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New York's Top 10 Hockey Teams

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Honorable Mention to the 1975-79 New York Islanders. Before the adjustments that made the 4 straight Stanley Cup wins, they got to the Cup Semifinals in 1975, '76, '77 and '79, and the Quarterfinals in '78.

Honorable Mention to the 1984-90 New York Islanders. The Denis Potvin and Mike Bossy era gave way to the Pat LaFontaine era. 6 seasons, 5 Playoff berths, but only 2 Playoff series won.

Honorable Mention to the 1987-88 New Jersey Devils. The 1st Playoff run for the team, not counting 1978 as the Colorado Rockies. They clinched a berth on the final day of the regular season, then beat the Islanders in the 1st Round (the only time these 2 teams have ever met in the Playoffs), then beat the Washington Capitals to reach the Finals of what was then called the Prince of Wales Conference, before falling to the Boston Bruins in a controversial 7-game series. It would take them 6 years to win another Playoff series.

Honorable Mention to the 1992-94 New York Islanders. After 2 straight Playoff misses, they had an inspiring run to the 1993 Conference Finals, then lost to the Rangers in the 1st round the next year. Then came Mike Milbury, and 7 straight Playoff misses.

10. 2011-12 New Jersey Devils. They beat the Rangers in a great Eastern Conference Finals, but lost the Stanley Cup Finals to the Los Angeles Kings. This remains the Devils' only season with a Playoff series win since 2007.

9. 2011-15 New York Rangers. 4 seasons, 3 trips to the Eastern Conference Finals, 1 trip to the Stanley Cup Finals. But let's be honest: This was a lucky team. It didn't have anywhere near the talent of the Rangers Cup Finals teams of 1928-29, 1932-33, 1937, 1940, 1950, 1972, 1979 or 1994.

8. 1947-50 New York Rangers. Made the Playoffs in '48, missed in '49, got all the way to overtime of Game 7 of the Finals in 1950, but lost, then missed the Playoffs for the next 5 seasons.

7. 1977-84 New York Rangers. 7 straight Playoff berths, and a trip to the 1979 Stanley Cup Finals, including a Semifinal thriller over the Islanders. But the Montreal Canadiens were too strong for them that time, and the Islanders were too strong for them in '81, '82, '83 and '84.

6. 1966-75 New York Rangers. 10 straight Playoff seasons. Got to the Stanley Cup Semifinals in 1971, the Finals in 1972, and the Semifinals in 1973 and 1974. Then got upset by the upstart Islanders in 1975, and it all fell apart.

This team may have had more talent than any Ranger team except the 1994 Cup winners: Goalie Eddie Giacomin, defenseman Brad Park, and the "Goal-a-Game Line" (the GAG Line) of Rod Gilbert, Jean Ratelle and Vic Hadfield. But they ran smack into the Henri Richard and Yvan Cournoyer Montreal Canadiens, and the Bobby Orr and Phil Esposito Boston Bruins.

5. 1940-42 New York Rangers. The Broadway Blueshirts won the Stanley Cup in 1940, and finished 1st overall in 1942. At the time, there was no Presidents Trophy for doing that, but having the best overall record in the regular season was considered nearly as important as winning the Cup. Then World War II's manpower drain caught up with the Rangers, and in the 76 years, they've been to just 5 Stanley Cup Finals, winning exactly 1 of them.

4. 1926-33 New York Rangers. 8 seasons (the 1st 8 in franchise history), 2 American Division titles, 4 trips to the Stanley Cup Finals, 2 Stanley Cups. The 1st great hockey team in New York history, advertised as "the Classiest Team in Hockey." Yes, the Rangers. This was a long time ago.

3. 1992-97 New York Rangers. 6 seasons, 2 regular-season Division titles (1992 Patrick, 1994 Atlantic), 2 Presidents Trophies for best regular-season record, 2 trips to the Eastern Conference Finals, 1 Stanley Cup (1994). Talent-wise, this team was  better than the Cup-winners of 1928, 1933 and 1940. And yet, so many stars, so little results.

If the Vancouver Canucks had won that Game 7 at Madison Square Garden, think about how Ranger fans would have reacted. Mark Messier would have gone from "The Messiah" to the greatest failure in the history of New York sports. They could have taken him downstairs to Penn Station and literally run him out of town on a rail. And then, instead of "78 Years, 1 Cup," it would be 78 years, no Cups!

2. 1995-2003 New Jersey Devils. 9 seasons, 5 Atlantic Division titles, 4 Eastern Conference Championships, 3 Stanley Cups. They weren't as star-laden as the '94 Rangers that delayed their rise by a year, but they were more accomplished.

1. 1978-84 New York Islanders. 7 seasons, 5 Patrick Division regular-season titles, 3 Presidents Trophies for best overall regular-season record, 5 straight trips to the Stanley Cup Finals, 4 straight Stanley Cups.

Love 'em or hate 'em, but, for sustained excellence, this was the best hockey team ever based in America, better than any the Boston Bruins, the Chicago Blackhawks, the Detroit Red Wings or the Pittsburgh Penguins -- and certainly the Rangers -- has ever produced.

Top 10 New York Tri-State Area Soccer Teams

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Honorable Mention to New York Tri-State Area teams that won the U.S. Open Cup, the leading competition in the country at the time, prior to the 1967 founding of the original North American Soccer League: Brooklyn Field Club in 1914, Paterson FC in 1923, the New York Nationals in 1928, New York Hakoah in 1929, the New York Americans in 1937, Brooklyn Celtic in 1939, Brooklyn Hispano in 1943, Brookhattan in 1945, New York Hungaria in 1951 and 1962, and the New York Ukranians in 1965.

From then until the founding of MLS in 1996, it's been won by the Greek American Athletic Club in 1967, 1968, 1969, 1985 and 1994; Elizabeth Soccer Club in 1970 and 1972; New York Hota in 1971; Brooklyn Dodgers Soccer Club in 1979; the New York Pancyprian-Freedoms in 1980, 1982 and 1983; New York AO Krete in 1984; and the Brooklyn Italians in 1991.

Since MLS was founded, the only U.S. Open Cup Finalists not to be MLS teams were the Rochester Rhinos in 1996 and 1999 (winning the latter), and the Charleston Battery in 2008.

I am not including the Major Indoor Soccer League. Given the smaller field, and needing to get the ball over the hockey boards at the arenas for it to go out of bounds, it was a very different game.

10. 1967-68 New York Generals. The 1st "major league" soccer team in New York, they played at the old Yankee Stadium, finished 3rd both seasons, and didn't make the Playoffs. They're just here to fill out the ranks.

9. 1996-2000 New York/New Jersey MetroStars. In their 1st 5 seasons, they made the Playoffs 3 times, and 3 times reached the Semifinal of the U.S. Open Cup.

8. 2001-05 New York/New Jersey MetroStars. In their 2nd 5 seasons, they made the Playoffs all 5 times, but lost in the Conference Semifinals all 5 times. In 2003, they reached the U.S. Open Cup Final, losing to the Chicago Fire. In 2006, they were bought by Red Bull, and the name was changed, although many fans still call them "Metro" and come to games wearing old MetroStars jerseys.

7. 2015-19 New York City FC. They have now played 5 seasons, with considerably more hype than the Red Bulls, if not with a stadium they can call their own. In the regular season, they finished 2nd in 2016 and '17, and 1st in '19.

But, after missing the Playoffs in their 1st season, they have made the Conference Semifinals 4 straight seasons, but never the Conference Finals. The closest they've come to the U.S. Open Cup is this year's Quarterfinal. Next year will be the 1st CONCACAF Champions League for which they've qualified.

6. 2006-08 New York Red Bulls. 3 seasons, 3 Playoff berths, the Quarterfinal of the 2006 U.S. Open Cup, and the 2008 MLS Cup Final, losing to the Columbus Crew. This remains the closest that the MetroStars/Red Bulls have ever come to winning a league title. Then came 2009, and the worst season in franchise history. Then came the move from the Meadowlands to Harrison, and a new era.

5. 2016-18 New York Red Bulls. Won the 2018 Supporters' Shield for MLS' best regular-season record. Got to the Conference Semifinals in 2016 and '17 and the Conference Finals in '18, and to the Final of the 2017 U.S. Open Cup, losing to Sporting Kansas City. Got to the Quarterfinals of the CONCACAF Champions League in '16 and '17, and the Semifinals in '18. But it all fell apart last season, ending this run.

4. 2010-15 New York Red Bulls. 6 seasons, the beginning of the Red Bull Arena era, and (through 2014) the Thierry Henry era. Won the Supporters' Shield in 2013 and 2015. Got at least to the Conference Semifinals every year, and to the Conference Finals in 2014 and 2015. Got to the Quarterfinals of the U.S. Oen Cup in 2011 and 2015. But, for varying reasons, didn't really get close to a title.

3. 1971-73 New York Cosmos. In their 1st 3 seasons in the old NASL, they finished 2nd, 1st and 2nd in their division, and reached the Semifinals of the Playoffs all 3 times. In 1972, they won the title.

2. 1981-84 New York Cosmos. 4 seasons, 3 division titles, the 1981 NASL runners-up and the 1982 Champions. This team was a bit different from the 1976-80 "dynasty." Chinaglia and Carlos Alberto were still there, but now, they had Rick Davis, Vladislav Bogićević, Dutch stars Wim Rijsbergen and Johan Neeskens, Steve Wegerle, Steve Hunt, Andranik Eskandarian, Seninho, and Hubert Birkenmeier in goal.

1. 1976-80 New York Cosmos.5 Playoff berths, and the 1977, 1978 and 1980 NASL Championships. Still the greatest soccer team in North American history, and if you think any MLS or Mexican team was better, then you must be smoking something Mexican. This team had Pelé, Carlos Alberto, Franz Beckenbauer, Giorgio Chinaglia, Jomo Sono, Werner Roth, Bobby Smith and Shep Messing.

It's hard to measure the Cosmos against the great teams of European and South American "football," since the competition they were facing wasn't exactly top-flight. But they did win 5 league championships, and the only other Tri-State Area teams to have done that are the Yankees and both the baseball and the football Giants.

Seriously, here's the count: Yankees 27 (counting World Series wins, rather than Pennants, as "league championships"), Giants (football) 8, Giants (baseball) 7, Cosmos 5, Rangers 4, Islanders 4, Devils 3, Mets 2, Knicks 2, Jets 1, Dodgers 1, Nets 0 (although 2 in the ABA), Liberty 0 (although 4 Conference Championships), Red Bulls 0 (although 3 Supporters' Shields), NYCFC 0.

How to Be a Devils Fan in Colorado -- 2019-20 Edition

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Next Friday night, the New Jersey Devils visit Denver to play the Colorado Avalanche.

Before You Go. The Denver Post is predicting high 40s for Friday afternoon, and low 30s for the evening. Although the mountain air leads to a lot of snow, no precipitation of any kind is forecast for the weekend. Still, keep the thin air in mind, and don't exert yourself too much.

Denver is in the Mountain Time Zone, so you'll be 2 hours behind New York time. And there's a reason it's called the Mile High City: The elevation means the air will be thinner. Although the Rocky Mountain region is renowned for outdoor recreation, if you're not used to it, try not to exert yourself too much. Cheering at a sporting event shouldn't bother you too much, but even if the weather is good, don't go rock-climbing or any other such activity unless you've done it before and know what you're doing.

Tickets. When the Avs arrived in 1995, and immediately won the Stanley Cup, the Rocky Mountain region went nuts, having never before won a World Championship in any sport. They stayed good for 10 years, and attendance remained great.

Then they fell apart, and people saw how well Colorado fans supported a non-winner: Not well, dropping under 15,000. However, the team and the attendance have both gotten better. Last season, they averaged 17,132 per game -- not terrible, but only 95 percent of capacity. So tickets will almost certainly be available.

Tickets in the lower level are $155 between the goals and $116 behind them. In the upper level, they're $58 between and $39 behind.

Getting There. It's 1,779 miles from Times Square in New York to the Denver plaza that contains the State House and the City-County complex, and 1,767 miles from Prudential Center to the Pepsi Center. You're probably thinking that you should be flying.

The good news: As was its predecessor, Stapleton International Airport (named for 1923-47 Mayor Benjamin F. Stapleton), the new Denver International Airport is a major change-planes-here spot for going to the West Coast and Las Vegas, meaning lots of nonstop flights from New York to Denver are possible.

The bad news: The game is a 1:00 (local time) start, so getting a morning flight might not help. You might have to fly out the night before, and spend 2 nights in a hotel. But at least it'll be cheap this time: A round-trip nonstop ticket can be had on United Airlines for only $321 -- cheaper than the bus or the train.

Amtrak's Lake Shore Limited leaves Penn Station at 3:40 PM Wednesday, arrives at Union Station in Chicago at 9:50 AM Thursday (that's Central Time). The California Zephyr leaves Chicago at 2:00 PM Saturday and arrives at Denver's Union Station at 7:15 AM (Mountain Time) Friday. The return trip would leave Denver at 7:10 PM Saturday, arrive in Chicago at 2:50 PM Sunday, leave Chicago at 9:30 PM Sunday, and get back to New York at 6:23 PM Monday. The round-trip fare is $508.

Conveniently, Union Station is at 1700 Wynkoop Street at 17th Street, just 3 blocks from Coors Field. The front of the building is topped by a clock, framed by an old sign saying UNION STATION on top and TRAVEL by TRAIN on the bottom.
Greyhound allows you to leave Port Authority Bus Terminal at 4:00 PM Tuesday, and arrive at Denver at 10:50 AM on Thursday, a trip of just under 45 hours, without having to change buses. That 44:50 does, however, include layovers of 40 minutes in Philadelphia, an hour and a half in Pittsburgh, an hour in Columbus, an hour in Indianapolis, 2 hours in St. Louis, and half an hour in Salina, Kansas; plus half-hour meal stops in Pennsylvania, Illinois and Kansas.

Round-trip fare is $575, but you can get it for $356 on advanced-purchase. You can get a bus back at 7:20 PM Friday and be back in New York at 3:00 PM Sunsday. The Denver Bus Center is at 1055 19th Street.

If you actually think it's worth it to drive, get someone to go with you, so you'll have someone to talk to, and one of you can drive while the other sleeps. You'll be taking Interstate 80 most of the way, through New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Ohio, Indiana, Illinois, Iowa and Nebraska, before taking Interstate 76 from Nebraska to Colorado, and then Interstate 25 into Denver.

(An alternate route: Take the New Jersey and Pennsylvania Turnpikes to Interstate 70 and then I-70 through Pennsylvania, Ohio, Indiana, Illinois, Missouri, Kansas and Colorado into downtown Denver. It won't save you an appreciable amount of time over the I-80 route, though.)

If you do it right, you should spend about an hour and a half in New Jersey, 5 hours and 15 minutes in Pennsylvania, 4 hours in Ohio, 2 hours and 30 minutes in Indiana, 2 hours and 45 minutes in Illinois, 5 hours and 15 minutes in Iowa, 6 hours in Nebraska, and 3 hours and 15 minutes in Colorado. Including rest stops, and accounting for traffic (you'll be bypassing Cleveland and Chicago, unless that's where you want to make rest stops), we're talking about a 40-hour trip.

Even if you're only going for one game, no matter how you got there, get a hotel and spend a night. You'll be exhausted otherwise. Trust me, I know: Trains and buses are not good ways to get sleep.

Once In the City. Founded in 1858 as a gold rush city, and named for James W. Denver, then Governor of the Kansas Territory, from which Colorado was separated, Denver is a State capital and city of 700,000 people, in a metro area of 3.4 million -- roughly the population of Brooklyn and Staten Island combined. It's easily the biggest city in, and thus the unofficial cultural capital of, the Rocky Mountain region.
The State House

Broadway is the main north-south drag, separating East addresses from West. But the northwestern quadrant of the street grid is at roughly a 45-degree angle from the rest of the city, and this area includes the central business district, Union Station and the ballpark.

The sales tax in the State of Colorado is 2.9 percent, however, the City of Denver adds a 3.62 percent sales tax, for a total of 6.52 percent. ZIP Codes in Colorado start with the digits 80 and 81, with the Denver area running from 800 to 810. The Area Code for Denver is 303, with 720 overlaid. Xcel Energy runs the electricity for the Denver area. The city is about 52 percent white, 32 percent Hispanic, 10 percent black, and 3 percent Asian.

The Denver Post is a good paper, but don't bother looking for the Rocky Mountain News: It went out of business in 2009. State Route 470 serves as Denver's "beltway." Bus and light rail service in Denver is run by the Regional Transportation District (RTD), and goes for $2.25 for a single ride, and $6.75 for a DayPass. Denver switched from tokens to farecards in 2013.
Don't worry, the weather isn't forecast to look like this during your visit.
I chose this picture for the look of the train, not for the snow and wet streets.

Going In. The Pepsi Center -- the soda company has always had naming rights on the arena since it opened -- is across Cherry Creek from downtown, about 2 miles northwest of City Hall. The intersection is 11th Street & Auraria Parkway, but the mailing address is 1000 Chopper Circle, in honor of Robert "Chopper" Travaglini, the beloved former trainer (and amateur sports psychologist) of the NBA's Nuggets, who share the arena. It is 1 of 10 current arenas that is home to both an NBA team and an NHL team.

Chopper was actually a Jersey Boy, albeit from Woodbury on the Philly side. He died in 1999, age 77, right before the new arena opened. Chopper Circle is an extension of Wewatta Street.
Pepsi Center/Elitch Gardens station on the RTD light rail. If you're coming in that way, you'll probably enter from the west gate, the Grand Atrium. If you're driving, parking starts at just $5.00. The rink is laid out east-to-west, and the Avs attack twice toward the east end.
In addition to hosting the Avs and the Nugs, the Pepsi Center has also hosted NCAA Tournament basketball games, the 2008 edition of NCAA's hockey "Frozen Four," and the 2008 Democratic National Convention.

Food. Being a "Wild West" city, you might expect Denver to have Western-themed stands with "real American food" at its arena. Being in a State with a Spanish name, in a land that used to belong to Mexico, you might also expect to have Mexican food. And you would be right on both counts.

Unfortunately, the team and arena websites don't include charts showing where the concession stands are. The arena website does mention specialty restaurants:

The Shock Top Lodge is a restaurant that seats 325 guests, 250 in the restaurant and 75 at the bar, and is open to all ticketholders.


The Land Rover Denver Club has seating for 125 and can accommodate over 300 in a lounge-like environment. Guests can enjoy a Colorado craft beer or specialty drink coupled with a chef-inspired dish without missing any of the action in the arena while watching on one of the 20 HD TVs positioned throughout the space. 
The Peak Pub House seats 236 patrons, and is available to suite holders, KeyBank Club Level ticket holders, the first row of rinkside, all courtside seat holders, and all patrons with 5 minutes remaining in the game.
Team History Displays. The Nuggets' banners are at the east end of the arena, and the Avalanche's banners at the west end. There are also banners for the Arena Football League's Colorado Mammoths -- which, like the Avs, the Nugs, MLS' Colorado Rapids, the NFL's St. Louis (for the moment) Rams, and English soccer's Arsenal Football Club, is owned by Walton of Walmart infamy in-law Stan Kroenke.

Despite the Avs' brief history, they have plenty of banners: 9 for Division titles in 1996, 1997, 1998, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003 and 2014; 2 for President's Trophies in 1997 and 2001; 2 for Western Conference Championships in 1996 and 2001; and 2 for Stanley Cups in 1996 and 2001.
There is no notation for what the franchise won as the Quebec Nordiques, and, since the original, hockey version of the Colorado Rockies made the Playoffs just once in 6 seasons before moving to become the Devils, there is nothing to hang for them anyway.
They've also retired 6 uniform numbers. From the 1996 Stanley Cup winners, they've retired 19 for center Joe Sakic, 21 for center Peter Forsberg, 33 for goaltender Patrick Roy (now the team's head coach) and 52 for defenseman Adam Foote.

All of these players were still there for the 2001 Stanley Cup win (although Forsberg was injured for the Playoffs). By that point, they'd brought in Number 23, right wing Milan Hejduk. And, in case the 2,001 times that Gary Thorne and ABC Sports mentioned it wasn't enough to jam it into your memory for all time, the Avs had added Number 77, defenseman Ray Bourque. (Interestingly enough, both times the Avs won the Cup, the Devils won it the season before. Too bad for the Avs that this pattern did not hold in 2003-04.)
Prior to the team's move to become the Avalanche, the Quebec Nordiques had retired 3 for defenseman Jean-Claude Tremblay, 8 for left wing Marc Tardif, 16 for left wing Michel Goulet, and 26 for center Peter Stastny (who, of course, also played for the Devils). Each of these numbers was returned to circulation, and Peter's son Paul Stastny, now with the Vegas Golden Knights, wore his father's Number 26 with the Avs.

In 2015, the Avs named a 20th Anniversary Team. From the 1996 Cup team, they chose Roy, Sakic, Forsberg, Foote, defenseman Sandis Ozolinsh, left wing Valeri Kamensky, right wings Adam Deadmarsh and our old friend Claude Lemieux, and center Stephane Yelle.

From the 2001 Cup team, they chose Roy, Sakic, Forsberg, Foote, Bourque, Hejduk, Yelle, defenseman Rob Blake, left wing Alex Tanguay, and centers Stephen Reinprecht and Chris Drury.

From after, but not including, 2001, they've chosen goalie Semyon Varlamov, defensemen John-Michael Liles and Erik Johnson, left wing Gabriel Landeskog, and centers Paul Stastny and Matt Duchene.
Yay, Claudie!

Roy, Sakic, Forsberg and Bourque are in the Hockey Hall of Fame. So are Jari Kurri, who played 70 games for the Avs in 1997-98; Dave Andreychuk, who played just 14 games for them in 2000; Paul Kariya, who played 51 for them in 2003-04; and Teemu Selanne, who played 78 for them in 2003-04.

Foote, Forsberg, Roy, Sakic, Hejduk and former team president and general manager Pierre Lacroix have been elected to the Colorado Sports Hall of Fame, which is located at the new Broncos' stadium. Bourque and Claudie have not.

Stastny and Sundin from the Quebec years, and Forsberg and Kamensky from both cities, have been elected to the International Ice Hockey Federation (IIHF) Hall of Fame. Bourque has received the Lester Patrick Trophy for contributions to hockey in America.

Sakic, Roy and Bourque -- the latter, still with the Boston Bruins at the time -- were named to The Hockey News' 100 Greatest Players in 1998. From the Nordiques, Tremblay, Tardif, Goulet, Christian Bordeleau, Rich LeDuc, Serge Bernie, and Richard Brodeur (no relation to Marty) were named to the WHA All-Time Team. Bill Baker and Steve Janaszak of the 1980 U.S. Olympic team played for the Rockies before they became the Devils. Earlier this year, Sakic, Roy, Forsberg and Bourque were named to the NHL's 100th Anniversary 100 Greatest Players.

Stuff. Altitude Athletics is located in the Grand Atrium at the arena's west end. It sells Avs, Nugs, Rapids and Mammoths merchandise -- but not the Rams or The Arsenal, as these teams are located nowhere near Denver. They may sell cowboy hats with team logos on them, to tie in with the State's Western heritage.

There are books available about the team, but, being Devils fans, you won't want to be reminded of how they plowed into the Meadowlands, off Exit 16W (as in 16 wins to get through the Playoffs), and took the Cup away from us. That story is told in the Denver Post's official retrospective, Mission 16W: Colorado Avalanche: 2000-'01 Stanley Cup Champions. Of course, Bourque is in the center of the cover, holding up the Cup, flanked by photos of Sakic and Roy.

From Claude Lemieux's unacceptable hit on Kris Draper in Game 6 of the 1996 Western Conference Finals, Detroit Red Wings fans have hated the Avs in general and Claudie in particular. They met in 5 Playoff series in 7 seasons from 1996 to 2002, and mixed in there was a regular-season nasty brawl in Detroit on March 26, 1997, in which Claudie was targeted by the Wings. Denver Post hockey writer Adrian Dater and then-Wings coach Scotty Bowman have collaborated on Blood Feud: Detroit Red Wings v. Colorado Avalanche: The Inside Story of Pro Sports' Nastiest and Best Rivalry

Of course, the Wings' real arch-rivals are the Chicago Blackhawks, as the Hawks' 2010s renaissance has reminded everyone. Wings-Avs was like Mets-Braves, Knicks-Heat and 49ers-Cowboys, in that it was only a rivalry for a brief time, and no longer really matters, especially now that the Wings have been moved to the Eastern Conference. It's also worth noting that Claudie had a nasty reputation even before 1996. Indeed, when he was introduced before Game 1 of the 1995 Stanley Cup Finals in Detroit, no Devils player was booed harder.

The Avs didn't release a 20th Anniversary DVD, but highlight packages for the 1996 and 2001 Cup wins are be available. The '96 version is titled The Colorado Avalanche Landslide; the '01, Mission Accomplished (again, playing on the theme of Bourque's 22-year quest for the Cup, failing 20 times with the Boston Bruins and once for the Avs before finally doing it).

During the Game. A November 19, 2014 article on The Hockey News' website ranked the NHL teams' fan bases, and listed the Avalanche's fans 27th, ahead of only Columbus, Dallas and Arizona: "Long way from 1990s heyday. Avs 3rd in standings, 23rd in attendance last year." Meaning the 2013-14 season. But in 2015-16, they were 19th, with their arena averaging 97 percent full. Maybe they should rethink their "metrics" for deciding these things.

Coloradans love their sports, but they're not known as antagonistic. Although the Jets came within a half of derailing a Bronco Super Bowl in 1999 (1998 season), and the Devils came within a game of short-circuiting their Stanley Cup run in 2001, the people of the Centennial State don't have an ingrained hatred of New Yorkers. As long as you don't wear Kansas City Chiefs or Oakland Raiders gear, you'll probably be completely safe. (But, as always, watch out for obnoxious drunks, who know no State Lines.)

Jake Schroeder is the Avs' regular National Anthem singer. The Avs take the ice to "Scalped," an old surf-rock instrumental by Dick Dale. (Shouldn't the L.A. Kings use a surf-rock song? I guess nobody ever thought to invent "ski-rock.") Their goal song is "Born to Rage" by the Swedish DJ duo Dada Life. (From Blue Swede and ABBA in the '70s to Ace of Base in the '90s, to Robyn to Dada Life today, Sweden has never learned how to make good music.) If the Avs win, they'll play "Takin' Care of Business" by Bachman-Turner Overdrive.
Jake Schroeder

Sometimes, the Avs will wear jerseys with "COLORADO" in descending diagonal block letters, much like the hated Rangers. This is an attempt to show how they might have dressed had they existed in the old days, not a "throwback" uniform, but a "fauxback." And since this game is on St. Patrick's Day, there will be holiday-themed promotions.

Despite sometimes featuring a shoulder patch of a Sasquatch/Bigfoot footprint, the Avs' mascot is Bernie the St. Bernard, emblematic of rescuing people trapped in alpine avalanches. He even has a keg around his neck, although from a distance, Avs fans, trained on Broncomania, could easily mistake it for a football. His theme song is "Atomic Dog," by Plainfield, New Jersey native George Clinton and his "P-Funk Empire." His uniform number is a bone, although it could, from a distance, appear to be a Number 1.
After the Game. Denver has had crime issues, and just 3 blocks from Coors Field is Larimer Street, immortalized as a dingy, bohemian-tinged, hobo-strewn street in Jack Kerouac's novel On the Road. But that scene was written in 1947. The Pepsi Center is, essentially, an island in a sea of parking. LoDo (Lower Downtown) has become, with the building of Coors Field and the revitalization of Union Station, a sort of mountain Wrigleyville, and thus the go-to area for Denver nightlife. So you'll probably be safe.

Across Chopper Circle from the arena is Brooklyn's at the Pepsi Center, a typical sports bar. If you want something a little more substantial, a Panda Express is on the other side of the arena, across Elitch Circle.

LoDo is loaded with bars that will be open after the game, including Scruffy Murphy's at Larimer & 20th, and an outlet of the Fado Irish Pub chain at Wynkoop & 19th. But the only baseball-named place I can find anywhere near Coors is Sandlot Brewery, at 22nd & Blake, outside the park's right-field corner. Behind home plate, at 1930 Blake Street, is The Sports Column, hailed by a recent Thrillist article as the best sports bar in the State of Colorado.

Perhaps the most famous sports-themed restaurant near Denver is Elway's Cherry Creek, a steakhouse at 2500 E. 1st Avenue in the southern suburb of Cherry Creek. Bus 83L. It's owned by the same guy who owns John Elway Chevrolet in another southern suburb, Englewood.

About a mile southeast of Coors Field, at 538 E. 17th Avenue in the Uptown neighborhood (not sure why a southern, rather than northern, neighborhood is called "Uptown"), is The Tavern, home of the local New York Giants fan club. Jet fans gather at Chopper's Sports Grill, possibly named for Chopper Travaglini, at 80 S. Madison Street at Bayaud Avenue, 3 miles southeast of downtown, in the Pulaski Park neighborhood. Bus 83, then a mile's walk.

If your visit to Denver is during the European soccer season (which is now in progress), your best bet for watching your favorite club is at The British Bulldog, 2052 Stout Street, just north of Downtown. The previous best choice, The Three Lions at 2239 E. Colfax Avenue, recently closed.

Sidelights. Denver is a fantastic city, and a good sports city, with much to look for. On February 3, 2017, Thrillist made a list ranking the 30 NFL cities (New York and Los Angeles each having 2 teams), and Denver came in 8th, in the top 1/3rd. They said:

Ah, Denver! Breathe in that fresh mountain air with just a hint of cannabis and green chile. Drink in the hoppy splendor of a craft beer scene that was bustling back when everyone still called them "microbreweries." Tolerate the alarmingly in-shape bro who stuck around after four years at Boulder to work as a part-time ski instructor and won't stop talking to you about fourteeners. Denver often gets championed for all the fantastic stuff to do right outside the city, what with the skiing and the hiking and the Red Rocks, but that does a disservice to all the good times to be had in Denver proper. The fact that said times can be had with herbal enhancement with nary a legal concern is just a bonus. 

On November 30, 2018, Thrillist published a list of "America's 25 Most Fun Cities," and Denver came in 13th. On February 12, 2019, they published an article calling Denver "America's Must-Visit City for 2019."

Empower Field at Mile High, formerly Invesco Field at Mile High and Sports Authority Field at Mile High, has been the home of the NFL's Denver Broncos since 2001. Everyone just gives it the same name as the old facility: "Mile High Stadium." It includes the Colorado Sports Hall of Fame, and the Broncos' Ring of Fame.

It was built on the site of the McNichols Sports Arena, home to the NBA's Denver Nuggets from 1975 to 1999, the NHL's Colorado Avalanche from 1995 to 1999, and the 1st major league team called the Colorado Rockies, the NHL team that became the Devils, from 1976 to 1982. It hosted the NCAA Final Four in 1990, with UNLV (the University of Nevada at Las Vegas) clobbering Duke. (The University of Colorado, in Boulder, made the Final Four in 1942 and 1955, although it wasn't yet called the Final Four.  No other Colorado-based school has made it, and none has won a National Championship -- not in basketball, anyway.)
The Rockies they're wishing good luck are the baseball team,
not the hockey team that used to play there and became the Devils.

When the time came to play the final concert at McNichols, the act that played the first concert there was brought back: ZZ Top. This fact was mentioned on an ABC Monday Night Football broadcast, leading Dan Dierdorf to note the alphabetic distinction of the long red-bearded men, and say, "The first one should have been ABBA." Which would have been possible, as they were nearly big in the U.S. at the time. However, the fact that the arena only lasted 24 years, making it not that hard for the act that played the first concert there to also play the last, says something about America's disposable culture.

The old stadium was just to the north of the new stadium/old arena. The current address is Mile High Stadium Circle, but the old intersection was W. 20th Avenue & Bryant St. (2755 W. 17th Avenue was the mailing address.) It was built in 1948 as Bears Stadium, an 18,000-seat ballpark.

When the American Football League was founded in 1960, it was expanded to 34,000 seats with the addition of outfield seating. The name was changed to Mile High Stadium in 1966, and by 1968 much of the stadium was triple-decked and seated 51,706. In 1977 – just in time for the Broncos to make their first Super Bowl run and start "Broncomania"– the former baseball park was transformed into a 76,273-seat horseshoe, whose east stands could be moved in to conform to the shape of a football field, or out to allow enough room for a regulation baseball field. The old-time ballpark had become, by the standards of the time, a modern football stadium.

The biggest complaint when the Rockies arrived in 1993 wasn't the thin air, or the condition of the stadium (despite its age, it was not falling apart), but the positioning of the lights: Great for football fans, but terrible for outfielders tracking fly balls. But it was only meant to be a temporary ballpark for the Rockies, as a condition for Denver getting a team was a baseball-only stadium. What really led to the replacement of Mile High Stadium, and its demolition in 2002, was greed: The Broncos' desire for luxury-box revenue.

At Bears/Mile High Stadium, the Broncos won AFC Championships in 1977, 1986, 1987, 1989, 1997 and 1998, winning the Super Bowl in the last 2 years after losing the first 4 in blowouts.  (They've now won an AFC title at the new stadium, but not a Super Bowl.) The Denver Bears won Pennants while playing there in 1957 (as a Yankee farm team), 1971, 1976, 1977, 1981, 1983 and 1991 (winning the last one under the Denver Zephyrs name).

The U.S. national soccer team played a pair of games at Mile High Stadium in the 1990s, and beat Mexico at the new stadium in 2002 (the only game they've played there so far). While the 2008 Democratic Convention was held at the Pepsi Center, Senator Barack Obama gave his nomination acceptance speech outdoors in front of 80,000 people at New Mile High Stadium.

The old stadium also hosted the Denver Gold of the United States Football League, the 1983 USFL Championship Game, the Colorado Caribous of the original North American Soccer League, and the Rapids from their 1996 inception until 2001 -- in fact, they played the stadium's last event, before playing at the new stadium from 2002 to 2006.

The U.S. national soccer team played a pair of games at Mile High Stadium in the 1990s, and beat Mexico at the new stadium in 2002 (the only game they've played there so far). It has been selected by the U.S. Soccer Federation as a finalist to be one of the host venues for the 2026 World Cup.

While the 2008 Democratic Convention was held at the Pepsi Center, Senator Barack Obama gave his nomination acceptance speech outdoors in front of 80,000 people at New Mile High Stadium.

The Red Lion Hotel Denver and the Skybox Grill & Sports Bar are now on the site of the old stadium. At McNichols, the Nuggets reached the ABA Finals in 1976, and the Avalanche won the 1996 Stanley Cup (albeit clinching in Miami). The Denver Dynamite won the 1st ArenaBowl in 1987, and again in 1989, 1990 and 1991, before finances forced them to fold anyway. Elvis Presley sang at McNichols on April 23, 1976.

The complex that included Mile High Stadium and the McNichols Arena was supposed to be the centerpiece of the 1976 Winter Olympics. But in a 1972 referendum, Colorado voters rejected funding that would have built more facilities, and, in what remains the only example of this ever happening, Winter or Summer, a city withdrew as host for an Olympic Games. They were awarded, instead, to Innsbruck, Austria, which already had the facilities in place from hosting them in 1964.

The new stadium, and the site of the old stadium and arena, are at Mile High Station on the light rail C-Line and E-Line.

Coors Field has been home to the Rockies since it opened in 1995. In February 2016, it hosted 2 hockey games. The University of Denver beat arch-rival Colorado College 4-1 in a game billed as the Battle On Blake. And as part of the NHL Stadium Series, the Colorado Avalanche hosted the Detroit Red Wings, perhaps perversely celebrating the 20th Anniversary of the birth of their brief but nasty rivalry. The Wings won 5-3.

2001 Blake Street (hence the team's nickname, the Blake Street Bombers) at 20th Street, 3 blocks from Union Station, accessible by light rail.

The Nuggets, known as the Denver Rockets until 1974, played at the Denver Auditorium Arena, at 13th & Champa Streets, from their 1967 inception until McNichols opened in 1975. It was also the home of the original Nuggets, who played in various leagues from 1935 to 1948, and then in the NBA until 1950.

It opened in 1908, and its seating capacity of 12,500 made it the 2nd-largest in the country at the time, behind the version of Madison Square Garden then standing. It almost immediately hosted the Democratic National Convention that nominated William Jennings Bryan for President for the 3rd time – although it's probably just a coincidence that the Democrats waited exactly 100 years (give or take a few weeks) to go back (it's not like Obama didn't want to get it right the 1st time, as opposed the 0-for-3 Bryan).

The Auditorium Arena hosted Led Zeppelin's 1st American concert on December 26, 1968. It was demolished in 1990 to make way for the Denver Performing Arts Complex, a.k.a. the Denver Center. Theatre District/Convention Center Station on the light rail's D-Line, F-Line and H-Line.

The Denver area's Major League Soccer team, the Colorado Rapids, plays at Dick's Sporting Goods Park in Commerce City, about 8 miles northeast of downtown. They'e won the MLS Cup since moving there, in 2010.

The U.S. national team has played there 3 times: A 2-0 win over Guatemala in a World Cup Qualifier on November 19, 2008; a 1-0 win over Costa Rica in a World Cup Qualifier on March 22, 2013 (the famous Snow Classico); and a 2-0 win over Trinidad & Tobago in a World Cup Qualifier this past June 8. The women's team has played there twice: A 2008 win over Brazil, and a 2012 win over Australia. It's also hosted football, rugby, lacrosse and concerts.

6000 Victory Way. If you're going in by public transportation from downtown Denver, Number 48 bus to 60th Avenue & Dahlia Street, then Number 88 bus to 60th & Monaco. Then they make you walk 10 blocks on 60th to get to the stadium.

The Beatles played Red Rocks Amphitheatre in suburban Morrison on August 26, 1964. It is still in business, and a Colorado Music Hall of Fame is a short walk away. 18300 W. Alameda Parkway, 10 miles west of downtown. Sorry, no public transportation.

Elvis played 2 shows at the Denver Coliseum on April 8, 1956, and 1 each on November 17, 1970 and April 30, 1973. Built in 1951, it still stands, seating 10,500, and is best known for concerts and the National Western Stock Rodeo. 4600 Humbolt Street at E. 46th Avenue, off Interstate 70, 3 miles northeast of downtown. Apparently, no public transportation to there, either.

On June 5, 1897, the Heavyweight Championship of the World was contested in Colorado. The British-born Champion, Bob Fitzsimmons – supposedly, in response to being told he was too small to fight heavyweights, the originator of the saying, "The bigger they are, the harder they fall"– knocked Lew Joslin out in the 2nd round. The fight happened in Leadville, 100 miles southwest of Denver.


Theoretically, it is possible to get there via public transportation. You'd have to take Greyhound from Denver to Vail, and then a local bus for over an hour to Leadville. And I can't find a source that lists the name of the fight's venue, or its address. So, unless you're a fanatic about boxing history and have to see the sites of every heavyweight title fight, I'd say skip this one.

Denver has some renowned museums, including the Denver Museum of Nature & Science (their version of the Museum of Natural History) at 2001 Colorado Blvd. at Montview Blvd. (in City Park, Number 20 bus), and the Denver Art Museum (their version of the Metropolitan Museum of Natural History), at 100 W. 14th Avenue Parkway at Colfax Avenue (across I-25 from Mile High Stadium, Auraria West station on the C-Line and E-Line).

Denver's history only goes back to a gold rush in 1859 – not to be confused with the 1849 one that turned San Francisco from a Spanish Catholic mission into the first modern city in the American West. The city isn't exactly loaded with history.

There's no Presidential Library – although Mamie Doud, the eventual Mrs. Dwight D. Eisenhower, grew up there, and her house is now a historic site. Mamie and "Ike" were married there, their son John (a future General, Ambassador and military historian) was born there, and the Eisenhowers were staying there when Ike had his heart attack in 1955. The house is still in private ownership, and is not open to the public. However, if you're a history buff, or if you just like Ike, and want to see it, it's at 750 Lafayette Street, at 8th Avenue. The Number 6 bus will get you to 6th & Lafayette.

After his heart attack, Ike was treated at Fitzsimmons Army Medical Center in nearby Aurora, 12 years after Senator John Kerry, nearly elected President in 2004 and now Secretary of State, was born there. It's not a Presidential Birthplace, because Kerry narrowly lost. It is now the University of Colorado Hospital. The Fitzsimmons Golf Course is across Montview Boulevard – it figures that Ike would be hospitalized next to a golf course! 16th Avenue & Quentin Street. Number 20 bus from downtown.

The University of Denver's Newman Center for the Performing Arts hosted a 2012 Presidential Debate between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney. 2344 East Iliff Avenue, about 5 miles south of downtown. The University's Magness Arena hosted the Frozen Four in 1961, 1964 and 1976. 2250 E. Jewell Avenue. Both can be reached via H Line light rail to University of Denver Station.
Magness Arena, part of the Daniel L. Ritche Center.

Byron "Whizzer" White was a star football and basketball player at the University of Colorado in the late 1930s, a Rhodes scholar, a running back for the Pittsburgh Steelers and the Detroit Lions, a Bronze Star-winning Navy officer in World War II, one of Colorado's finest lawyers, the chairman of John F. Kennedy's Presidential campaign in the State, and one of the longest-serving Justices on the U.S. Supreme Court. He is buried at the Cathedral of St. John in the Wilderness, 1350 N. Washington Street at 14th Avenue. Bus 6.

Denver doesn't have as many tall buildings as the nation's bigger cities, nor are they as interesting, architecturally. The tallest building in the State of Colorado is Republic Plaza, 714 feet high, at 17th Street & Tremont Place downtown. A 1,000-foot, 90-story residential/hotel tower, currently named Six Fifty 17 for its address (650 17th Street), has been proposed by Uruguay-born, New York-based architect Carlos Ott and local real estate firm Greenwich Realty Capital. They hope to break ground on it in Summer of 2018.

The University of Colorado is in Boulder, 30 miles to the northwest. At Market Street Station, 16th & Market, take the BV Bus to the Boulder Transit Center, which is on campus. The ride should take about an hour and 20 minutes. Colorado State University is in Fort Collins, 65 miles up Interstate 25 north, and forget about reaching it by public transportation.

The U.S. Air Force Academy is outside Colorado Springs, 60 miles down I-25. As with Fort Collins, you'd need Greyhound. Unlike CSU, you might not be able to just go there: Some of the area is restricted.  It is, after all, a military base.

Colorado Springs was also home to the Broadmoor Ice Palace, which hosted what's now called the Frozen Four every year from its inception in 1948 until 1957, and again in 1969. The 3,000-seat arena at The Broadmoor Resort & Spa was home ice to Colorado College from 1938 to 1994. 1 Lake Avenue, across Cheyenne Lake from the main hotel.

Its 7,750-seat 1998 replacement, the Broadmoor World Arena, is 4 miles to the east, at 3185 Venetucci Blvd.
Colorado College has won hockey's National Championship in 1950 and 1957. The University of Denver has won it in 1958, 1960, 1961, 1968, 1969, 2004 and 2005. None of the other Colorado schools has yet won it.

A few TV shows have been set in Denver, but you won't find their filming locations there. The old-time Western Whispering Smith and the more recent one Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman were set in old Colorado (Colorado Springs), but filmed in Southern California. And Greendale, the setting of
Community, is fictional.

Probably the most famous show set in Colorado is South Park, and that's a cartoon, so forget seeing anything from that. Not quite as cartoonish was Mork & Mindy, set in Boulder. The McConnell house actually is in Boulder, at 1619 Pine Street. But don't try to copy the opening-sequence scene with Robin Williams and Pam Dawber on the goalposts at the University of Colorado's Folsom Field. You could fall, and end up saying, "Shazbot!"

The most famous show ever set in Colorado was Dynasty, ABC's Excessive Eighties counterpart to CBS' Dallas, starring John Forsythe as Blake Carrington, an oilman and a thinly-veiled version of Marvin Davis, who nearly bought the Oakland Athletics from Charlie Finley in 1978 with the idea of moving them to Mile High Stadium, but the deal fell through. Right, you don't care about Blake, all you care about is the catfights between the 2nd and 1st Mrs. Carrington's: Krystle (Linda Evans) and Alexis (Joan Collins). The Carrington mansion seen in the opening credits is in Beverly Hills, but the building that stood in for the headquarters of Denver Carrington is at 621 17th Street, while the one that stood in for Colbyco is at 1801 California Street.

Movies set in Denver or its suburbs include The Unsinkable Molly Brown, the original Red Dawn, and, of course, Things to Do In Denver When You're Dead. Films involving skiing often take place in Colorado towns such as Aspen or Vail. City Slickers, a film with loads of baseball references, has a cattle drive that ends in Colorado, but there's no indication of how close it is to Denver. Flashback
takes place on the Pacific Coast, but Denver's Union Station stands in for a train station in San Francisco.

*

The Colorado Avalanche arrived in Denver 25 seasons ago, ready to challenge for the Stanley Cup, and, with a couple of roster tweaks, won it. They stayed strong, won another Cup, fell, and have risen again. Their history isn't long, but it's already deep. Not unlike the Devils.

How to Go to the Army-Navy Game

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On Saturday afternoon, December 14, the Army-Navy Game will be played at Lincoln Financial Field in Philadelphia. In college football, a sport so rife with at best tomfoolery and at worst corruption, this is the noblest day of the year.

It occurs to me that I'm posting this on December 7, the anniversary of the U.S. military's darkest day, the Japanese attack on the naval base at Pearl Harbor in Honolulu, Hawaii in 1941. The game has been played on the Pearl Harbor anniversary, in 1963 -- having been postponed from November 30, the weekend after President John F. Kennedy was assassinated. It was scheduled for December 7 in 1985, 1991, 1996 and 2002.

Starting in 1978, it was scheduled for the week after Thanksgiving weekend, usually the 1st Saturday in December, so it wouldn't conflict with any other major rivalries. But with the institution of conference championship games, starting in 2009, it's been moved to the 2nd Saturday in December. And it is nearly always played in Philadelphia.

Before You Go. Philadelphia is just down the road, so it's in the Eastern Time Zone, and you don't have to worry about fiddling with various timepieces. And the weather will be almost identical to what you'd have on the same day in New York. Still, check the combined website for the Philadelphia newspapers, the Inquirer and the Daily News, before you head out.

For the moment, it looks like, for next Saturday, temperatures in Philly will be in the high 30s all day, with light snow predicted late, possibly during the game. That might make getting out difficult, especially if you drove in. There was an Army-Navy Game a few years ago played entirely in a snowfall.

Tickets. Yeah, right. This game always sells out. And the Army football website specifically says, "Army-Navy tickets cannot be purchased online."

So unless you know a guy -- or you know a guy who knows a guy -- you're watching this game, if at all, on TV. Maybe you can go to StubHub or somebody like that. At last check, StubHub's cheapest ticket for this game was $150, and Seatgeek had them for $160 and up.

Army's usual ticket prices: $95 on the sidelines, $40 in the end zones and in the upper deck. Navy's usual ticket prices: $45 for all seats.

Getting There. It's an even 100 miles from Times Square in Manhattan to Lincoln Financial Field in South Philadelphia. Too close to fly. If you are driving, you'll need to get on the New Jersey Turnpike. If you're not "doing the city," but just going to the game, take the Turnpike's Exit 3 to NJ Route 168, which forms part of the Black Horse Pike, to Interstate 295. (The Black Horse Pike later becomes NJ Route 42, US Route 322 and US Route 40, going into Atlantic City. Not to be confused with the White Horse Pike, US Route 30, which also terminates in A.C.)

Take I-295 to Exit 26, which will get you onto Interstate 76 and the Walt Whitman Bridge into Philly. Signs for the sports complex will soon follow, and the stadium is at 11th Street and Pattison Avenue (though the mailing address is "1 Lincoln Financial Field Way").

From anywhere in New York City, allow 2½ hours for the actual drive, though from North Jersey you might need only 2, and from Central Jersey an hour and a half might suffice. But you'll need at least another half-hour to negotiate the last mile or so, including the parking lot itself.

If you don't want to drive, there are other options, but the best one is the train. Philadelphia is too close to fly, just as flying from New York (from JFK, LaGuardia or Newark) to Boston, Baltimore and Washington, once you factor in fooling around with everything you gotta do at each airport, doesn't really save you much time compared to driving, the bus or the train.

And I strongly recommend not taking the bus. If you do, once you see Philadelphia's Greyhound terminal, at 10th & Filbert Streets in Center City, the nation's 2nd-busiest behind New York's Port Authority Bus Terminal, you'll say to yourself, "I never thought I'd say this, but thank God for Port Authority!"
The Philly terminal is a disgrace. I don't know how many people are in Atlantic City on an average Summer day, when both the beaches and the casinos are full (I'm guessing about half a million, or 1/3rd the size of Philly), but it has a permanent population of 40,000 people, compared to the 1.6 million of Philadelphia, and it has a bus station of roughly equal size and far greater cleanliness than Philly's. Besides, Greyhound service out of Newark's Penn Station is very limited, and do you really want to go out of New Jersey into Manhattan just to get across New Jersey into Philadelphia?

If you can afford Amtrak, and that will be $110 round-trip between New York and Philly, it takes about 2 hours to get from Penn Station to the 30th Street Station at 30th & Market Streets, just across the Schuylkill River from Center City.
West front of 30th Street Station, with Center City in background

Unlike the dull post-1963 Penn Station, this building is an Art Deco masterpiece from 1933, and is the former corporate headquarters of the Pennsylvania Railroad. Ironically, it never had the official name "Pennsylvania Station" or the nickname "Penn Station." You might recognize its interior from the Eddie Murphy film Trading Places. (If you can't afford Amtrak, or if you can but you'd rather save money, I'll get to what to do in a minute.)
Interior of 30th Street Station

If you do want to go for it, from 30th Street Station, you can take a cab that will go down I-76, the Schuylkill Expressway, to I-95, the Delaware Expressway, to South Broad Street to the Sports Complex. I would advise against this, though: When I did this for a Yankees-Phillies Interleague game at the Vet in 1999, it was $15. It's probably $30 now.

Instead, you'll need to take the subway, which, like Philly's commuter-rail and bus systems, is run by SEPTA, the SouthEastern Pennsylvania Transportation Authority. You might recognize their "S" logo from Trading Places, and the bus that hits Tommy Morrison at the end of Rocky V. You'll have to exit 30th Street Station and cross 30th Street itself to get into the 30th St. station on the Market-Frankford Line.

Philadelphia was the last American city to use tokens for their subway system, but, this year, phased them out in favor of a farecard. An all-day KeyCard will allow up to 8 rides, for $9.00. One ride on a SEPTA subway train is $2.50, cheaper than New York's.

One ride on a SEPTA subway train is $2.50, cheaper than New York's, but they don't sell single tokens at booths. They come in packs of 2, 5 and 10, and these packs are damn hard to open. Two cost $4.00; five are $10.00, and a ten-pack costs $20.00. They are also available for bulk purchase.

From 30th Street, take the Market-Frankford Line to 15th Street (that's just one stop), where you'll transfer to the Broad Street Line at City Hall Station. Being a Met fan, you'll notice that the MFL's standard color is blue, while the BSL's is orange. Blue and orange. Don't think that means they want to make Met, Knick or Islander fans feel at home, though.

From City Hall, if you're lucky, you'll get an express train that will make just 2 stops, Walnut-Locust and AT&T (formerly "Pattison" -- yes, they sold naming rights to one of their most important subway stations). But you'll want to save your luck for the game itself, so don't be too disappointed if you get a local, which will make 7 stops: Walnut-Locust, Lombard-South, Ellsworth-Federal, Tasker-Morris, Oregon, Snyder and AT&T. The local should take about 10 minutes, the express perhaps 7 minutes.

If you don't want to take Amtrak, your other rail option is local. At Newark Penn, you can buy a combined New Jersey Transit/SEPTA ticket to get to Center City Philadelphia. Take NJT's Northeast Corridor Line out of Penn Station to the Trenton Transit Center. This station recently completed a renovation that has already turned it from an absolute hole (it was so bad, it made Philly's bus station look like Grand Central) into a modern multimodal transport facility. At Trenton, transfer to the SEPTA commuter rail train that will terminate at Chestnut Hill East, and get off at Suburban Station, at 17th Street & John F. Kennedy Blvd. (which is what Filbert Street is called west of Broad Street). Getting off there, a pedestrian concourse will lead you to the City Hall station on the Broad Street Line, and then just take that to Pattison.
A SEPTA train at 30th Street Station

Because there will be a lot more stops than there are on Amtrak (especially the SEPTA part), it will take 2 hours and 10 minutes, but you'll spend $52 round-trip, about what you'd spend on a same-day purchase on Greyhound, and less than half of what you'd be likely to spend on Amtrak. However, again, time will be an issue: The last SEPTA Trenton Line train of the night that will connect to an NJT train leaves Suburban Station at 11:57 PM (and the NJT train it will connect to won't get to Penn Station until 2:46 AM), so this might not be an option for you this time, either.

The subway's cars are fairly recent, and don't rattle much, although they can be unpleasant on the way back from the game, especially if it's a football game and they're rammed with about 100 Eagles fans who've spent the game sweating and boozing and are still loaded for bear for anyone from outside the Delaware Valley.
As for the Academies: The U.S. Military Academy is in West Point, New York, 51 miles north of Midtown. By car, the best way is to take the West Side Highway to the George Washington Bridge into New Jersey, then the Palisades Interstate Parkway into New York State, until reaching U.S. Route 6. Take that east until you reach U.S. Route 9W, and take that north to N.Y. Route 218, the West Point Highway. It becomes Thayer Road. Turn left on Mills Road, which turns right. Soon, you will have Michie Stadium on your left, and the Lusk Reservoir on your right.

The U.S. Naval Academy is in Annapolis, Maryland, 216 miles southwest of Midtown. Take the Lincoln Tunnel to the New Jersey Turnpike, over the Delaware Memorial Bridge, to Interstate 95 South, across Delaware and into Maryland. When Interstate 895 splits off from I-95, and becomes the Harbor Tunnel Thruway, take that, to Interstate 97 South, all the way to its end at U.S. Route 50. Take that east, to Maryland Route 70 East, then make a right on Farragut Road. Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium will be on your right.

If you do it right, getting to West Point should take about an hour and 15 minutes, no rest stop necessary; and getting to Annapolis should take 3 1/2 hours, maybe 4 1/2 if you make a rest stop halfway, at the rest area on the Delaware Turnpike.

Amtrak doesn't go to West Point or Annapolis. The Short Line bus service leaves Port Authority at 8:30 AM, arriving at West Point at 9:55; and leaves West Point at 5:07 PM, returning at 7:00. Round-trip fare is $32.80.

Greyhound doesn't cooperate for Navy: They have 1 bus a day leaving Port Authority for Annapolis, leaving at 9:00 AM, arriving in Baltimore at 12:40 PM, then you have to change buses to one leaving at 2:00, and arriving at 2:30. So a noon kickoff is already blown, and even a 3:30 kickoff might be problematic if the bus you're switching to comes in late. There won't be a bus back that night: You'd have to leave Annapolis at 11:45 AM on Sunday, arrive at Baltimore at 12:15 PM, change buses and leave at 12:45, getting back to New York at 4:25.

The fare is $142, but it can drop to $93 with advanced purchase. The station is at 308 Chinquapin Round Road, a mile and a half west of Navy's stadium.

Once In the City. Philadelphia is a Greek word meaning "brotherly love," a name given to it by its founder, William Penn, in 1683. So the city is nicknamed "The City of Brotherly Love." The actions and words of its sports fans suggest that this is ridiculous. Giants coach Bill Parcells was once caught on an NFL Films production, during a game with the Eagles at the Vet, saying to Lawrence Taylor, "You know, Lawrence, they call this 'the City of Brotherly Love,' but it's really a banana republic." And Emmitt Smith, who played for that other team Eagles fans love to hate, the Dallas Cowboys, also questioned the name: "They don't got no love for no brothers."
Center City, with the Ben Franklin Bridge in the foreground

On a map, it might look like Penn Square, surrounding City Hall, is the city's centerpoint, but this is just geographic, and only half-refers to addresses. Market Street is the difference between the north-south numbering on the numbered Streets. But the Delaware River is the start for the east-west streets, with Front Street taking the place of 1st Street. Broad Street, which intersects with Market at City Hall/Penn Square, takes the place of 14th Street.
The William Penn statue atop City Hall

In the Colonial and Revolutionary periods, Philadelphia was the largest city in America, before being overtaken by New York. As recently as 1970, it had about 2 million people. But "white flight" after the 1964 North Philadelphia riot led to the population dropping to just over 1.5 million in 2000. It has inched back upward since then. The metro area as a whole -- southeastern Pennsylvania, South Jersey and most of Delaware -- is about 7.2 million, making it the 7th-largest in the country, behind New York, Los Angeles, Chicago, San Francisco, Boston and Dallas.

The sales tax is 6 percent in the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania (Massachusetts, Virginia and Kentucky are also "commonwealths" in their official State names), 8 percent within the City of Philadelphia.

ZIP Codes in Philadelphia start with the digits 191. In the suburbs, it's 189, 190, 193 and 194. For much of the Lower Hudson Valley, it's 105 to 109, including West Point at 10996. For Annapolis, it's 214.

The Area Code for Philadelphia is 215, and the suburbs 610, with 267 overlaying both, and 445 being added in 2018. For the Lower Hudson Valley, it's 914, with 845 split off in 2000, including West Point. For Annapolis, it's 410, with 443 and 667 overlaid.

Philadelphia is about 42 percent black, 36 percent white, 13 percent Hispanic, and 7 percent Asian. North, Northwest and West Philadelphia are now almost entirely black, although University City (home to the University of Pennsylvania and Drexel University) and some of Southwest Philly remains white. South Philadelphia (Italian) and Northeast Philadelphia (Irish and Polish) remain mostly white.

The Philadelphia electric company is named just that: Philadelphia Electric Company, or PECO. And while it's not quite as close as it is to New York, much of the Jersey Shore is easily reachable from Philadelphia, thanks to Interstate 195, New Jersey Route 70, U.S. Routes 30 and 40, the Atlantic City Expressway, and New Jersey Transit's buses and its Atlantic City Rail Line. Point Pleasant Beach is 76 miles away, Seaside Heights 64 miles, Long Beach Island 62, Atlantic City 61, Ocean City 65, Wildwood 90, and Cape May 92.

Once At the Academy -- West Point. Both services trace their lineage back to 1775, in the War of the American Revolution. The Continental Congress passed resolutions establishing the Continental Army on June 14, and the Continental Navy on October 13.

On January 27, 1778, the Continental Army established a post at West Point, in the Town of Highlands, Orange County, New York, because its high ground over a bend in the Hudson River made it a good place to defend the City of New York from British attack from Canada. It was this that made it a target for betrayal by General Benedict Arnold when he turned coat in 1780, but the plot was exposed in time. Ironically, it was then known as Fort Arnold for his heroics upriver at Saratoga in 1777.

So it was renamed Fort Clinton, and it remains the oldest continuously occupied place in the U.S. Army. The United States Military Academy was established there on March 16, 1802, as various internal rebellions and the "Quasi-War" with France showed the federal government that the Founding Fathers' mistrust of a large standing army was no longer advisable. The administration building, seen in the background of this photo, is named Thayer Hall, after the Academy's founder, Brigadier General Sylvanus Thayer.
The Academy should not be confused with the Army War College, which (with some irony, and not just football-related) is on the grounds of the former Carlisle Indian School in Carlisle, Pennsylvania

There are about 4,300 Cadets and 600 academic staff. The student body is currently about 61 percent white, 18 percent Hispanic, 13 percent black, 5 percent Asian, 3 percent others; and 20 percent female. West Point graduates include, but are by no means limited to (listed here with their Class year):

* 1820s: Albert Johnston 1826, served in the Mexican-American War, then betrayed his country by becoming a Confederate General, killed at the Battle of Shiloh; Jefferson Davis 1828, served in the Mexican-American War, served Mississippi in both houses of Congress, Secretary of War, then betrayed his country by becoming the President of the Confederate States of America; Robert E. Lee 1829, served in the Mexican-American War, then betrayed his country by becoming a Confederate General.

* 1830s: George Meade 1835, won the Battle of Gettysburg; Edward Ord 1839, instrumental in the closing days of the American Civil War; Montgomery Blair 1835, served in the Mexican-American War, represented Dred Scott in his legal bid for freedom from slavery.

* 1840s: William Tecumseh Sherman 1840, conqueror of Georgia and the Carolinas; Ulysses S. Grant 1842, conqueror of Mississippi and Virginia, Secretary of War, 18th President of the United States 1869-77; Abner Doubleday 1842, a hero of the Battle of Gettysburg, but not the inventor of baseball, nor claimed to be; Winfield Scott Hancock 1844, a hero at Gettysburg, Democratic nominee for President in 1880; George McLellan 1846, disastrous 1st commander of U.S. forces in the Civil War, Democratic nominee for President in 1864; James Longstreet 1842, George Pickett 1846, and Thomas "Stonewall" Jackson 1846, all 3 served in the Mexican-American War, then betrayed their country by becoming Confederate Generals, Jackson being killed by "friendly fire" at the Battle of Chancellorsville.

* 1850s: Henry Slocum 1852, Union General, Congressman from New York, namesake of a tour boat that burned and killed over 1,000 people in the East River in 1904; Philip Sheridan 1853, Grant's adjutant in Virginia, later both a hero and a villain of the Indian Wars, credited with saying, "The only good Indian is a dead Indian"; John Bell Hood 1853, James Ewell Brown "Jeb" Stuart 1854, and Joseph Wheeler 1859, betrayed their country by becoming Confederate Generals. Stuart was killed in the Battle of Yellow Tavern. "Fighting Joe" Wheeler was a commander in the Western Theater, then restored his loyalty to the Union, served Alabama in Congress, and was welcomed back into the U.S. Army for the Spanish-American War, at one point forgetting what war he was in, telling his men, "Come on, boys, we've got the damn Yankees on the run!" He was 62, but survived the war.

* 1860s: Adelbert Ames 1861, Medal of Honor for the First Battle of Bull Run, Governor and Senator from Mississippi; Henry du Pont 1861, Medal of Honor for Battle of Cedar Creek, Senator from Delaware; George Armstrong Custer 1861, a hero at Gettysburg, decidedly unheroic in the Indian Wars thereafter, killed at the Battle of Little Bighorn in 1876.

* 1870s: Tasker Bliss 1875, General in Spanish-American War, Army Chief of Staff in World War I; Henry O. Flipper 1877, the 1st black graduate, served in the Indian Wars.

* 1880s: George Goethals 1880, designed and built the Panama Canal; John J. Pershing 1886, commanding General in World War I.

* 1900s: Hugh S. Johnson 1903, World War I quartermaster general, led President Franklin Roosevelt's National Recovery Administration, and was named Time magazine's Man of the Year in 1933; Douglas MacArthur 1903, decorated in World War I, Medal of Honor for commanding the evacuation of Bataan in World War II, 1st commander of U.S. forces in Korean War; George S. Patton 1906, hero of World War I, General of World War II; Henry "Hap" Arnold 1907, commander of the U.S. Army Air Force in World War II, 1st commander of the U.S. Air Force and its only 5-star General; George S. Patton 1909, served in World War I, commander of the 7th, 3rd and 15th U.S. Army in World War II, namesake of the Academy Award winner for Best Picture of 1970.

* 1910s: Carl Spaatz 1914, 1st Chief of Staff of the U.S. Air Force; Omar Bradley 1915, commanded 1st Army in WWII, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff 1949-53; Luis Esteves 1915, 1st Hispanic graduate, commanded troops in both World Wars, founded the Puerto Rico National Guard; Dwight D. Eisenhower 1915, Supreme Allied Commander in World War II, President of Columbia University 1948-50, 34th President of the U.S. 1953-61; Bob Neyland 1916, longtime football coach at the University of Tennessee, their stadium is named for him; Matthew Ridgway 1917, commanded 82nd Airborne in WWII, commanded UN troops in Korea in 1951 and '52, Supreme Commander of NATO 1952-53; Mark Clark 1917, commanded UN troops in Korea in 1952 and '53; Norman Schwarzkopf Sr. 1918, director of New Jersey State Police, father of later General "Stormin' Norman"; Leslie Groves 1918, directed the Manhattan Project to build the atomic bomb; Lucius Clay 1918, ran the Berlin Airlift 1948-49; Anthony McAuliffe 1919, famously answered a Nazi call for surrender at the Battle of the Bulge with one word, "Nuts!"; Nathan Twining 1919, helped turn the Army Air Force into the separate Air Force, 1st General from that branch to serve as Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, 1957-60.

The Class of 1915 is known as "The Class the Stars Fell On," because 59 out of 164 graduates, 36 percent, eventually became Generals, led by 5-star Generals Eisenhower and Bradley.

* 1920s: Lyman Lemnitzer 1920, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff 1960-62, Supreme Commander of NATO 1963-69; Maxwell Taylor 1920, commanded 101st Airborne in WWII, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff 1962-64; Earl Blaik 1920, longtime Army football coach, more about him later.

* 1930s: Earle Wheeler '32, commanded units in WWII and Korea, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff 1964-70; William Westmoreland '36, served in WWII and Korea, commanded U.S. troops in Vietnam 1964-68; Creighton Abrams '36, served in WWII and Korea, commanded U.S. troops in Vietnam 1968-72, namesake of the M1 Abrams Tank; Benjamin O. Davis Jr. '36, commander of the Tuskegee Airmen, 1st black 4-star General, son of the 1st black Army General; Andrew Goodpaster '39, Supreme Commander of NATO 1969-74.

* 1940s: George S. Brown '41, Air Force, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff 1974-78; Bernard Rogers '43, Supreme Commander of NATO 1979-87; John Eisenhower '44, Ike's son, U.S. Ambassador to Belgium 1969-71, military historian; Warren Hearnes '46, Governor of Missouri 1965-73, University of Missouri's arena is named for him; Anastasio Somoza '46, President of Nicaragua 1967-72 and 1974-79; Alexander Haig '47, served in Korea, brigade commander in Vietnam, White House Chief of Staff to Presidents Nixon and Ford, Supreme Commander of NATO 1974-79, Secretary of State to President Reagan 1981-82; Brent Scowcroft '47, National Security Advsier 1975-77 and again 1989-93.

* 1950s: Frank Borman '50, commanded Apollo 8; Edwin "Buzz" Aldrin '51, lunar module pilot on Apollo 11 and 2nd man to walk on the Moon; Fidel Ramos '50, President of the Philippines 1992-98; Ed White '52, made 1st U.S. spacewalk on Gemini 4; Michael Collins '52, command module pilot on Apollo 11; John Galvin '54, Supreme Commander of NATO 1987-92; Norman Schwarzkopf Jr. '56, commanded coalition troops in Persian Gulf War.

* 1960s: George Joulwan '61, Supreme Commander of NATO 1993-97; Barry McCaffrey '64, Bronze Star in Vietnam, unit commander in Persian Gulf War, Director of the Office of National Drug Control Policy 1996-2001; Eric Shinseki '65, 3 Bronze Stars in Vietnam, 1st Asian-American 4-star General, Secretary of Veterans Affairs 2009-14; Wesley Clark '66 (valedictorian), served in Vietnam, unit commander in Persian Gulf War, Supreme Commander of NATO 1997-2000; Roy Moore '69, Chief Justice of the Alabama Supreme Court 2001-03 and 2013-17, bid for U.S. Senate lost due to sex scandal.

* 1970s: Jack Reed '71, current Senator from Rhode Island; David Petraeus '74, commanded U.S. forces in Afghanistan 2007-10, CIA Director 2011-12; Martin Dempsey '74, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff 2011-15; Stanley McChrystal '76, commanded U.S. troops in Iraq 2003-08; Jose Maria Figueres '79, President of Costa Rica 1994-98.

* 1980s: H.R. McMaster '84, unit commander in Iraq War, National Security Adviser 2017-18; Mike Pompeo '86, CIA Director 2017-18, now U.S. Secretary of State; Mark Esper '86, current U.S. Secretary of Defense; John Bel Edwards '88, current Governor of Louisiana.

Once At the Academy -- Annapolis. Like the County in which it sits, Annapolis, the capital of the State of Maryland, was named for Anne Arundell (the County's name drops the 2nd L), Lady Baltimore, wife of Cecil Calvert, 2nd Baron Baltimore, who founded the Maryland Colony. (Her father was also a Baron.) The city was founded in 1649, and is now home to about 39,000 people, about 55 percent white, 26 percent black, 17 percent Hispanic and 2 percent Asian.
The Maryland State House

The United States Naval Academy was founded on October 10, 1845, and produces officers for both the U.S. Navy and the U.S. Marine Corps. The Air Force, the Coast Guard and the Merchant Marine have separate academies, but the Marines do not. The Academy should not be confused with the Naval War College in Newport, Rhode Island.
Currently, the Academy has 4,576 Midshipmen, of whom 64 percent are white, 17 percent Hispanic, 12 percent black and 7 percent Asian. Women were first admitted in 1975, and now make up 28 percent of the students. Presuming they graduate, they will receive commissions as Ensigns in the Navy or 2nd Lieutenants in the Marines. Notable graduates include:

19th Century: George Dewey 1858, Admiral in the Spanish-American War, winner of the Battle of Manila Bay without losing a man;John A. Lejeune 1888, 3-star General in World War I, Commandant of the Marine Corps 1920-29, Marine training center Camp Lejeune in North Carolina is named for him; William D. Leahy 1897, 1st Fleet Admiral (5-star Admiral), during World War II.

1900s: Ernest King 1901, Fleet Admiral in World War II; William Halsey 1904, also Fleet Admiral in World War II; Chester Nimitz 1905, another Fleet Admiral in World War II; John McCain Sr. 1906, Admiral in World War II and founder of an Annapolis dynasty.

1910s: Richard Byrd 1912, Admiral, Arctic and Antarctic explorer; Arthur W. Radford 1916, Admiral, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff 1953-57.

1920s: Charles McVay 1920, Captain of the ill-fated USS Indianapolis; Hyman Rickover '22, submarine Admiral, "Father of the Nuclear Navy"; Robert A. Heinlein '29, science fiction pioneer.

1930s: John McCain Jr. '31, commanded the U.S. Pacific Command while his son was a prisoner of war; Thomas H. Moorer '33, Admiral, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff 1970-74; William Lederer '36, co-author of The Ugly American; Edward Beach '39, author of the submarine warfare novel Run Silent, Run Deep.

1940s: John McMullen '40, engineer, former owner of the NHL's New Jersey Devils and MLB's Houston Astros, the Academy's hockey arena is named for him; Alan Shepard '45, 1st American in space aboard Freedom 7, commanded Apollo 14 and walked on the Moon; Walter Schirra '46, only man to fly in Projects Mercury, Gemini and Apollo; Jimmy Carter '47, 39th President of the United States, 1977-81; Jeremiah Denton '47, prisoner of war in Vietnam, Senator from Alabama; William Crowe '47, Admiral, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff 1985-89.

1950s: James Irwin '51, lunar module pilot on Apollo 15, walked on the Moon; Jim Lovell '52, flew on Apollo 8 and commanded Apollo 13; Ross Perot '53, computer mogul, heavily involved in getting some Vietnam War prisoners released, 3rd party candidate for President in 1992 and 1996; William Anders '55, also flew on Apollo 8; Politics: Charles Wilson '56, Congressman from Texas involved in Afghanistan, namesake of book and film Charlie Wilson's War; John McCain III '58, pilot in the Vietnam War, America's most famous prisoner of war, longtime Senator from Arizona, Republican nominee for President in 2008; John Poindexter '58, National Security Advisor 1985-86, convicted in Iran-Contra; Robert "Bud" McFarlane '59, National Security Advisor 1983-85, also convicted in Iran-Contra.

1960s: Peter Pace '67, Marine General, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff 2005-07; Oliver North '68, Marine veteran of Vietnam, aide to President Reagan, convicted in Iran-Contra scandal, right-wing radio and talk show host; Michael Mullen '68, Admiral, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff 2007-11; Jim Webb '68, former Senator from Virginia.

1980s: Montel Williams '80, actor and talk show host; Alan Hale '80, astronomer known for his discovery of comets.

2000s: John S. McCain IV '09, known as Jack like his grandfather.

There seem to be more notable Annapolis graduates in fiction than West Point graduates. These include Steve McGarrett of Hawaii Five-O (1941 in the original version, 1997 in the new version), Thomas Magnum of Magnum, P.I. (1967), Jack Ryan in Tom Clancy's novels (1972 in The Hunt for Red October, probably moved up for the current TV series), President Matthew Santos of The West Wing (1982), and Harmon Rabb of JAG (1985).

Going In. Philly sports fans' reputation will not come into play for the Army-Navy Game. This may be the most respectful sports crowd you will ever be in. Why Philadelphia? Because it's roughly halfway between the academies: 146 miles from West Point, and 122 miles from Annapolis. This will be the 120th Game, and the 89th played in Philadelphia.

The Philadelphia sports complex is at Broad Street and Pattison Avenue, 36 blocks -- 7 miles -- south of City Hall. It once included Sesquicentennial/Municipal/John F. Kennedy Stadium (1926-1992), The Spectrum (1967-2009), and Veterans Stadium (1971-2004). The arena now known as the Wells Fargo Center was built on the site of JFK Stadium. Citizens Bank Park, the new home of the Phillies, was built to the east of The Vet. And Lincoln Financial Field was built south of the new ballpark, and east of the Spectrum.
The old version of the Philly sports complex, on a 1980s postcard.
Top to bottom: The Vet, The Spectrum, JFK Stadium.

JFK Stadium hosted the Game from 1936 to 1941, and again from 1945 to 1979, at which point its condition was judged to have deteriorated too much to host it. Veterans Stadium hosted from 1980 to 2001, except for 1983, 1989, 1993, 1997 and 2000. Lincoln Financial Field, named for the insurance and investment company that owns the naming rights, has been the regular host since it opened in 2003. 

There is plenty of parking in the complex, including a lot on the site of  The Vet. But you'll be a lot better off if you take the subway. Not really because of the price of parking ($45 for Army-Navy), but because traffic is going to be awful.

The first time I went to a sporting event in Philadelphia, it was a 4th of July celebration at the Vet, and 58,000 people showed up to see the Phils face the Houston Astros, with Nolan Ryan pitching. The game and the fireworks combined did not last as long as it took to get out of the parking lot and onto the Walt Whitman Bridge: 2 hours and 40 minutes. Trust me: Take the freakin' subway.

Coming out of the AT&T subway station, you'll walk down Pattison Avenue, with a parking lot on the former site of Veterans Stadium to your left, and the site of the Spectrum to your right. Further to your right is the successor to the Spectrum, the Wells Fargo Center, named for the banking and insurance company. Further to your right is Lincoln Financial Field. You'll be likely to enter either at the north end zone or the west sideline.
The Philly sports complex, prior to The Spectrum's demolition in 2010.
The site of the Vet is now a parking lot, and JFK Stadium has been replaced
by the Wells Fargo Center. On the right, Citizens Bank Park and Lincoln Financial Field.

The new home of the Eagles has seen them make the Playoffs more often than not, and reach the Super Bowl in the 2004 and 2017 seasons, winning the latter. And fan behavior, while still rowdy, is not as criminal as it was at The Vet: No more municipal court under the stands is necessary.
"The Linc" has hosted 4 games of the U.S. National Soccer Team, games of the 2003 Women's World Cup, an MLS All-Star Game, and several games by touring European teams such as Manchester United, Glasgow Celtic and A.C. Milan. It hosted an NHL Stadium Series game between the Pennsylvania teams, the Philadelphia Flyers and the Pittsburgh Penguins, in 2019. It has been selected by the U.S. Soccer Federation as a finalist to be one of the host venues for the 2026 World Cup.
Midshipmen on the field, before marching into the stands.
The stadium looks a lot taller from the inside,
because the field is well below street level.

Inside the stadium, concourses are wide and well-lit, a big departure from The Vet. Escalators are safe and nearly always work, as opposed to the Vet, which did not have escalators, only seemingly-endless ramps. Getting to your seat should be easy. The field is natural grass, and aligned north-to-south.

Army football began on The Plain, the parade field at the Academy, about a mile northeast of Michie Stadium. It hosted the 1st Army-Navy Game, a 24-0 Navy win on November 29, 1890; and the 3rd, a 12-4 Navy win on November 26, 1892.

This was the site of 2 of the defining games of early college football, both upsets of Army: By the Carlisle Indian School, coached by Pop Warner and led by Jim Thorpe, 27-6 on November 9, 1912; and by Notre Dame, effectively introducing the forward pass to football, with Gus Dorais passing to end and future coach Knute Rockne, resulting in a 35-13 win on November 1, 1913. Before that, Notre Dame was just another small Catholic university in the Midwest; after it, it was legend.
The Plain! The Plain!
(Do not make that joke if you visit.)

The official address for Michie Stadium is 700 Mills Road. Parking is $25. It was named for Captain Dennis Michie, who organized the 1st Army football team in 1890, and was killed in the Spanish-American War in 1898. Its 1st game was a 17-0 Army win over St. Louis University on October 4, 1924.
It seats 38,000, sits on Lusk Reservoir, with the Hudson River in view to the east, surrounded by trees, giving it, especially with the leaves changing in mid-season, one of the greatest settings in college football.
The playing surface, which runs north-to-south, and has sadly been artificial turf since 1977 (FieldTurf since 2008), has been named Red Blaik Field since 1999, in memory of the man who coached Army to the 1944, '45 and '46 National Championships.

It has hosted the Army-Navy Game only once, on November 27, 1943, due to wartime travel restrictions. Navy won, 13-0. Army didn't lost another game for 4 years, until "The Miracle of Morningside Heights," their 1947 loss at Columbia.
Navy football began in 1879 at Worden Field, like The Plain a parade ground, located at Upshur and Balch Roads. It hosted the 2nd Army-Navy Game on November 28, 1891, Army's 1st win, 32-16; and the 4th, on December 2, 1893, a 6-4 Navy win.
A recent photo of Worden Field

Navy built a stadium in 1914, but didn't start using it for football until 1924. The 12,000-seat Thompson Stadium was named for Robert Means Thompson, Class of 1868, who created or led several athletically-based organizations until his death in 1930. It was only then that the facility named simply "The Football Field" was renamed Robert Means Thompson Stadium.
Again due to wartime travel restrictions, it hosted the Army-Navy Game on November 28, 1942, a 14-0 Navy win. Neither Academy has played a home game in the series since 1943.

The Academy realized that Thompson Stadium was too small, and built Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium. They tore Thompson Stadium down, and built Lejeune Hall in 1982, hosting the Naval Academy Athletic Hall of Fame and its swimming teams. 52 King George Street at Brownson Road.
The new stadium opened on September 26, 1959, with Navy beating William & Mary 29-2. The official address is 550 Taylor Avenue, at Cedar Park Road. Parking is $30. Capacity is 34,000. The playing surface runs northwest-to-southeast, has been FieldTurf since 2004, and is named Jack Stephens Field, for Jackson T. Stephens '47, who contributed to, among other things, a recent renovation of the stadium.
In addition to Navy football, the stadium has been home to the Military Bowl since 2013, the Chesapeake Bayhawks of Major League Lacrosse since 2009 (lacrosse is big in the Chesapeake region, especially in Maryland), and a game in the NHL Stadium Series on March 3, 2018, with the "host" Washington Capitals beating the Toronto Maple Leafs 5-2.

It also hosted some of the soccer games of the 1984 Olympics, despite the Games being across the country in Los Angeles; and a home game of D.C. United, between the closing of Robert F. Kennedy Stadium and the opening of Audi Field, a 1-0 win over the Columbus Crew on April 14, 2018.
Hockey configuration

Food. From the famed Old Original Bookbinder's (125 Walnut Street at 2nd, now closed) and Le Bec Fin (1523 Walnut at 16th) to the Reading Terminal Market (Philly's version of  the South Street Seaport, at 51 N. 12th St at Filbert) to the South Philly cheesesteak giants Pat's, Geno's and Tony Luke's, Philly is a great food city and don't you ever forget it.

The variety of food available at The Linc. Little of it is healthy (no surprise there), but all of it is good. Tony Luke's has a stand (as it also does at the ballpark and the arena). So does Chickie's & Pete's, to sell their fish and their "crab fries" -- French fries with Old Bay seasoning mix, not fries with crabmeat. Also at The Linc are outlets of Bassett's Original Burgers & Fresh Cut Fries, Seasons Pizza, and Melt Down grilled cheese stands.

So what kind of food can you get at Michie Stadium? Fortunately, not stereotypical Army food, like Spam, powdered eggs, and creamed chipped beef on toast, served on a metal tray, the legendary "shit on a shingle." According to StadiumJourney.com:

 

 
 
At Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium, StadiumJourney says:

     

Team History Displays. The Eagles' championship banners and retired number banners are retracted for Temple football games and the Army-Navy Game, so you won't be able to see them.

Army's teams were originally called the Cadets, which is what the players, and all the others members of the student body, actually are. But when they were in their glory years in the 1940s, newspapers called them "The Black Knights of the Hudson," for their black jerseys. So, in 1999, the Academy officially changed the teams' names to the Black Knights.

Except for 1998 to 2004, when it was a member of Conference USA, Army has been an independent team. No, they were never a member of the Big East Conference, nor the Atlantic Coast Conference, nor the American Athletic Conference, as Navy is. So they've never won a Conference Championship.

But they were awarded National Championships in 1944, 1945 and 1946. Was this due to the manpower shortage of World War II, when West Point Cadets, being trained for war, got the most obvious deferments of all? Perhaps. These titles are on the facing of the upper deck. They do not display their retroactively-awarded 1914 and 1916 National Championships. Although those were during World War I, America did not enter until the Spring of 1917, so that wasn't the reason they won.
Those wartime teams were led by a pair of running backs known as Mr. Inside and Mr. Outside -- respectively, Felix "Doc" Blanchard, winner of the 1945 Heisman Trophy; and Glenn Davis, winner of the 1946 Heisman. Blanchard's Number 35 and Davis' Number 41 have been retired. So was the Number 61 of one of their blockers, guard Joe Steffy. Their 4th and most recent retired number is 24, of running back Pete Dawkins, the 1958 Heisman winner, and later a General in the Vietnam War.

There are 24 Army football players in the College Football Hall of Fame:

* From the 1900s: Quarterback Charlie Daly and halfback Paul Bunker.

* From the 1910s: Center John McEwan, tackle Alex Weyand and fullback Elmer Oliphant.

* From the 1920s: Center Ed Garbisch, halfback Harry Wilson, tackle Bud Sprague and halfback Chris Cagle.

* From the 1930s: Guard Harvey Jablonsky.

* From the 1940s, including the 3 National Championships: Tackles Robin Olds and Frank Merritt; quarterbacks Doug Kenna, Arnold Tucker and Arnold Galiffa; guards John Green and Joe Steffy; halfback Glenn Davis; fullback Doc Blanchard; and end Barney Poole. Head coach Earl "Red" Blaik is also in the Hall. In 1986, in recognition of Blaik's service to the nation, President Ronald Reagan awarded him the nation's highest civilian honor, the Presidential Medal of Freedom. (He died in 1989, at age 92.)
Blanchard, Blaik and Davis

* From the 1950s: Quarterback Don Holleder, halfbacks Pete Dawkins and Bob Anderson, and tight end Bill Carpenter.

From 1960 onward, Army football (like Navy football) simply hasn't been what it used to be. They have resisted the forward pass, and few high school stars have wanted to go to any of the service academies. Probably the most notable Army football player of the last 60 years is Andrew Rodriguez, a linebacker who rebounded from a serious back injury to win the 2011 James E. Sullivan Award as America's foremost collegiate athlete.

Future 5-star Generals Dwight D. Eisenhower and Omar Bradley played in the 1912 loss to Carlisle. Legend has it that "Ike" ended his football career when he tried to tackle Carlisle's Jim Thorpe, and Thorpe stepped on him, breaking his leg. It's not true: Ike's injury happened in the next game. Bradley also played in the 1913 loss to Notre Dame. Both played before uniform numbers were worn, or else Ike's number would surely be retired. I suppose they could retire Number 34 for him, since he was the 34th President.

Just as Army's teams used to be called the Cadets, Navy's teams are called the Midshipmen. Navy was an independent until 2015, when it joined the American Athletic Conference, and has never won a conference title. No, they never joined the Big East or the ACC, either.

They were retroactively awarded the 1926 National Championship, but there is no display for this at the stadium. Rather, they have the names of battles on the facing of the upper deck.
The Lambert Trophy, for "the best college football team in the East," has been awarded to Army in 1944, 1945, 1946, 1948, 1949, 1953 and 1958; and to Navy in 1943, 1954, 1957, 1960 (a tie vote with Yale), 1963 and 2015.

Navy have 2 Heisman Trophy winners: Running back Joe Bellino in 1960, and quarterback Roger Staubach in 1963. Staubach's Number 12 and Bellino's Number 27 are retired. So are the Number 19 of 2010s quarterback Keenan Reynolds, and the Number 30 of 1980s running back Napoleon McCallum.

There are 19 Navy players in the College Football Hall of Fame:

* From the 1900s: fullback Jonas Ingram.

* From the 1910s: Halfback John Dalton, guard John Brown.

* From the 1920s: Halfback Tom Hamilton, tackle Frank Wickhorst.

* From the 1930s: Halfback Buzz Borries, tackle Slade Cutter.

* From the 1940s: Tackle Don Whitmire, guard George Brown, end Dick Duden, halfbacks Skip Minisi and Clyde Scott, center Dick Scott.

* From the 1950s: Tackle Steve Eisenhauer (no relation to Dwight D. Eisenhower, though it must have been strange to see that name at Annapolis instead of West Point), end Ron Beagle, tackle Bob Reifsnyder and running back Joe Bellino.

* Since 1960: 1962-64 quarterback Roger Staubach, 1973-75 safety Chet Moller and 1981-85 running back Napoleon McCallum.

* Coaches: Gil Dobie, 1917-19; Bill Ingram, 1926-30, including the '26 title; Wayne Hardin, 1956-64, including Bellino's and Staubach's Heisman years; George Welsh, 1973-81.

Aside from football players, Navy's most famous athlete is Basketball Hall-of-Famer David Robinson '88.

For most of their histories, Army's football team did not accept invitations to bowl games. Army's 1st bowl was the 1984 Cherry Bowl at the Silverdome outside Detroit, and they beat Michigan State. They've also won the 1985 Peach Bowl, the 2016 Heart of Dallas Bowl, and the Armed Forces Bowl (played every year at Texas Christian University in Fort Worth since 2003, except for 2010 and 2011 at Southern Methodist University in Dallas) in 2010, 2017 and 2018.

Navy never showed reluctance to accept bowl bids. They played in the 1924 Rose Bowl, playing the University of Washington to a 14-14 tie. They've won the 1955 Sugar Bowl, the 1958 Cotton Bowl, the 1978 Holiday Bowl, the 1996 Aloha Bowl, the 2004 Emerald Bowl, the 2005 and 2014 Poinsettia Bowls, the 2009 Texas Bowl, the 2013 Armed Forces Bowl, and the 2015 and 2017 Military Bowls (played in their own stadium). They also played in bowls usually played on New Year's Day in the 1961 Orange Bowl and the 1964 Cotton Bowl, but lost.

The Army-Navy Game is prone to streaks. From 1922 to 1933, Army went 8-0-2. Navy won 5 straight, 1939-43. Then Army went 5-0-1, 1944-49. Navy won 5 straight, 1959-63. Navy went 9-1-1, 1973-83. Army won 5 straight, 1992-96. Navy won a whopping 14 straight, 2002-15. Since then, Army has won the last 3. Overall, Navy leads 60-52-7. The last tie was in 1981. Among the most notable games:

* November 27, 1926, the dedication of the original Soldier Field in Chicago (which opened in 1924 and was demolished in 2002, to make way for the new one), as a monument to the American servicemen of World War I. Navy was undefeated, and Army had lost only to Notre Dame, so this was for the National Championship. Before over 100,000 fans, the game ended in a 21-21 tie, and Navy, still undefeated, was awarded the National Championship.

* December 2, 1944, at Municipal Stadium in Baltimore. Army was Number 1, Navy Number 2, and Army won 23-7.

* December 1, 1945, at Municipal (JFK) Stadium in Philadelphia. Again, Army was Number 1, Navy Number 2, and it was, like the next year's Army-Notre Dame game, labeled "The Game of the Century." Army won 32-13.

* November 30, 1946, at Municipal Stadium in Philadelphia. Army was coming off its tie with Notre Dame and a win away to Number 5 Penn, and hadn't lost in 3 years. Navy had won their opener against Villanova, and then dropped 7 straight. And Army took a 21-0 lead.

But Navy fought back, and were down 21-18 and on Army's 2-yard line with time on the clock for 1 more play. Tom Hamilton, Navy's coach and a member of the 1926 title team, decided to go for the winning touchdown, and they didn't make it. After the game, he was asked why he didn't go for the tying field goal, and introduced a new saying to the American sports lexicon: "A tie is like kissing your sister."

* November 26, 1949, at Municipal Stadium in Philadelphia. This one was a doozy. Undefeated Army's schedule did not include Notre Dame (which won the National Championship), and it did include such teams as Davidson, VMI, and Ivy League schools Harvard, Columbia and Penn. On the other hand, they did have to travel to Michigan, then ranked Number 1, and won 21-7. And Fordham came into their game with Army 4-0, having outscored its opponents 178-34, and Army beat them 35-0. So it wasn't that bad.

Anyway, some Cadets went on a reconnaissance mission to Annapolis, to see what the Midshipmen were planning, and came back to West Point to prepare. So the Midshipmen taunted the Cadets with a rewrite of "On, Brave Old Army Team" with these lyrics: "We don't play Notre Dame, we don't play Tulane, we just play Davidson, for that's the fearless Army way!" And they unfurled a banner reading, "WHEN DO YOU DROP NAVY?" And the Cadets unfurled a banner reading, "TODAY."

Uh-oh... The next Midshipmen banner referenced the famous college for women, not far from West Point: "WHY DON'T YOU SCHEDULE VASSAR?" And the Cadets unfurled a banner reading, "WE ALREADY GOT NAVY." Annapolis' humiliation continued, as Army won 38-0.

* December 7, 1963, at Municipal Stadium in Philadelphia. There had been talk of canceling the game, scheduled for November 30, in the wake of the assassination of President John F. Kennedy. But Jacqueline Kennedy said her husband would've wanted it to be played, so it was postponed for a week.

Quarterback Rollie Stichweh led Army to a touchdown on its 1st drive. CBS, broadcasting the game, used the occasion to present the first-ever instant replay of a sports play, for that touchdown. But Navy quarterback Roger Staubach led his Number 2-ranked team to a 21-15 lead.

Stichweh got Army to 4th and goal on the Navy 2 with time running out, but he couldn't make himself hear over the roar of a crowd of 102,000 fans (the stadium seated 105,000), and he couldn't get a play off. Navy won, and were sent to the Cotton Bowl to play Number 1 Texas for the National Championship, but lost.

The following year, Municipal Stadium was renamed John F. Kennedy Stadium. It hosted the U.S. leg of the Live Aid concert in 1985, and was closed in 1992, torn down to make was for the arena now named the Wells Fargo Center.

* November 25, 1983, at the Rose Bowl in Pasadena, California. The site was chosen because the Academies wanted to bring the game to Southern California with its various military bases: An Army base in Inglewood, Naval Base San Diego, Edwards Air Force Base outside Mojave, the Marines' Camp Pendleton in Oceanside, and the Coast Guard station in Long Beach.

It was said to be the largest airlift of U.S. military personnel since World War II. The attendance was 81,000, although the Rose Bowl could then seat over 100,000. The referee -- obviously, he was NCAA-qualified, or he wouldn't have been given this job -- was noted chef, art collector, author, and, oh yes, actor Vincent Price. Navy won, 42-13, and nobody complained that Price, known for his horror movie roles, was unfair.

* December 10, 2016, at M&T Bank Stadium in Baltimore. Army won 21-17, ending Navy's 14-game winning streak in the rivalry.

Since 1972, Army, Navy and Air Force have played for the Commander-in-Chief's Trophy. Air Force has won it 19 times, Navy 15, Army 6, and there have been 4 ties. All-time in games, despite being the newest of the academies, Air Force leads Army 37-16-1 and Navy 30-22.
Whichever team wins the Trophy turns it so that their mascot faces front:
Army with a mule. Navy with a goat, Air Force with a falcon.

Both Army and Navy have rivalries with Notre Dame. The 1913 Army-Notre Dame game was the 1st meeting between the teams, and, as I said, was also the beginning of the South Bend legend. Army played Notre Dame at the Polo Grounds in New York on October 18, 1924, a 13-7 Fighting Irish win that saw the greatest sports columnist of the day, Grantland Rice, name the Irish backfield "The Four Horsemen."

On November 10, 1928, at the old Yankee Stadium, Notre Dame trailed Army 6-0 at halftime. Coach Knute Rockne told his team about George Gipp, who helped them win the 1920 National Championship, but soon died.

As Rockne told it, Gipp told him on his deathbed, "Sometime, when the team is up against it, and the breaks are beating the boys, tell them to go out there with all they've got, and and win just one for the Gipper. I don't know where I'll be then, Rock, but I'll know, and I'll be happy." And then he told them, "Gentlemen, this is that game." And the players left the locker room in tears, and beat Army 12-6.

The truth? George Gipp was a great player by the standards of his day, but also the kind of guy who, if today's rules were in effect, would've gotten Notre Dame put on probation. The movie about Rockne and Gipp hadn't been made yet. These players would have been about 10 years old when Gipp played. So, presuming Rockne did give the speech -- regardless of whether he made it up or it was true -- it wouldn't have had much of an effect. But it makes a great story!

They played at Yankee Stadium again on November 9, 1946, and it was billed as "The Game of the Century," because Notre Dame went into it ranked Number 2, Army was Number 1, Army hadn't lost since Notre Dame beat them in 1943, and Notre Dame was undefeated as well, and they had won the last 3 National Championships between them, and whoever won this one would make it 4. It was broadcast coast-to-coast on radio. Network TV was still a year away, but it would have been huge on that, too. But the game didn't live up to the hype, and ended 0-0. The National Championship was split between them.

The teams played their 1913 to 1922 and 1973 games at West Point; 1923 at Ebbets Field in Brooklyn; 1924 at the Polo Grounds; 1925 to 1929, 1931 to 1946, and 1969 at the old Yankee Stadium; 1930 at Soldier Field in Chicago; 1947, 1958, 1966, 1970, 1974, 1980, 1985, 1998 and 2006 at Notre Dame Stadium in South Bend; 1957 at Franklin Field in Philadelphia; 1965 at Shea Stadium; 1977, 1983 and 1995 at Giants Stadium; 2010 at the new Yankee Stadium (but Notre Dame was designated the home team), and 2016 at the Alamodome in San Antonio.

It ceased to be an annual rivalry after the 1947 game, and has been played only sporadically since then. Army hasn't won since 1958, Notre Dame winning the last 15 meetings, and they lead 39-8-4.

Navy's rivalry with Notre Dame has been played more often, and is also lopsided. Notre Dame leads 77-13-1, including winning 44 straight years, 1964 to 2006. In fact, Until 2007 (and even that one took 3 overtimes before Navy won, 46-44), neither Army (1958, with Pete Dawkins) nor Navy (1963, with Roger Staubach) had beaten Notre Dame without a Heisman Trophy winner playing for them. Navy won 3 of the next 4 games, but Notre Dame has since won 8 of the last 9.

Notre Dame has hosted the game in 1928 at the original Soldier Field in Chicago, in 1930, in 1937, in 1994, and in odd-numbered years since 1953. The October 13, 1928 game at Soldier Field is said to have had the largest crowd in college football history, over 120,000 people, due to Notre Dame being relatively close in northeastern Indiana, and Chicago being a Navy city, home to the Great Lakes Naval Training Station.

Because its on-campus stadium is so much smaller, Navy tends to host the game in bigger cities, frequently in Baltimore: At Municipal Stadium in 1927, 1929, 1931, 1933, 1935, 1936, 1938, 1940, 1941, 1944, 1946, 1948, 1949 and 1951; at that stadium's replacement, Memorial Stadium, in 1954, 1956, 1958, 1986 and 1988; and at that stadium's replacement, M&T Bank Stadium, in 2002, 2006 and 2008.

They've also hosted it at Cleveland Municipal Stadium in 1932, 1934, 1939, 1942, 1943, 1945, 1947, 1950, 1952, 1976, 1978; Franklin Field in Philadelphia in 1960, 1962, 1964, 1966, 1968 and 1970; Veterans Stadium in Philadelphia in 1972, 1974, 1993; Giants Stadium in 1980, 1982, 1984, 1990 and 2004; that stadium's replacement, MetLife Stadium, in 2010; FedEx Field outside Washington in 1998 and 2014; the Citrus Bowl in Orlando in 2000; TIAA Bank Field in Jacksonville in 2016; and Jack Murphy Stadium in San Diego in 2018.

Twice, the game has been played on foreign soil, in Dublin, Ireland -- which, you would presume, would feel like a home game for "the Fighting Irish"). It was played at Croke Park, the national home of the sports of Gaelic football and hurling, in 1996; and at the national soccer stadium, Aviva Stadium, in 2012. Aviva Stadium will host it again in 2020.

Stuff. The Linc has a Pro Shop, and there are also outlets in the Market Place at Garden State Park (built on the site of the old horse racing track in Cherry Hill) and in Lancaster (way out in Pennsylvania Dutch Country).

The Academies' respective stadiums have souvenir stands, but not team stores as you would find at NFL stadiums. The West Point Gift Shop is at 2110 New South Post Road, behind the Visitors' Center. There is a USMA Bookstore, at 606 Thayer Road. Navy has the USNA Gift Shop across from Lejeune Hall, and the Midshipmen Store at 101 Wilson Road. I don't know if visiting civilians can shop at the USMA Bookstore and the Midshipmen Store, or if it's only for students.

There are a lot of good books about Army football, and a few about the Army-Navy Game, but hardly any strictly about Navy football. Brian Kelly -- not the current Notre Dame coach -- wrote Great Moments in Army Football: From the Beginning of Football all the way to Army's Great 2017 team. Lars Anderson wrote Carlisle vs. Army: Jim Thorpe, Dwight Eisenhower, Pop Warner, and the Forgotten Story of Football's Greatest Battle.

Mike Belter wrote both A Forgotten First National Championship: The 1914 Army Football Team and Operation Black September: The 1977 Army Football Team. His writing is better than his timing: The former was published in 2016, a little late for its event's 100th Anniversary; and the latter was published in 2018, slightly late for its 40th Anniversary.

Jack Cavanaugh and Pete Dawkins wrote about the 1940s West Point team in Mr. Inside and Mr. Outside: World War II, Army's Undefeated Teams, and College Football's Greatest Backfield Duo. Mark Beech wrote about Dawkins' 1958 Heisman season in When Saturday Mattered Most: The Last Golden Season of Army Football.

In 2005, Barry Wilner and Ken Rappoport published Gridiron Glory: The Story of the Army-Navy Football Rivalry. Randy Roberts wrote about the 1944 game in A Team for America: The Army-Navy Game That Rallied a Nation.

Crime fiction novelist Michael Connelly and Roger Staubach wrote of Staubach's biggest regular-season game for Navy in The President's Team: The 1963 Army-Navy Game and the Assassination of JFK. Nicholaus Mills wrote about the next year's game with Every Army Man Is with You: The Cadets Who Won the 1964 Army-Navy Game, Fought in Vietnam, and Came Home Forever Changed. John Feinstein, who's written a lot of sports books and does radio broadcasts for Navy football, published A Civil War: Army Vs. Navy, a Year Inside College Football's Purest Rivalry in 1997.

The year 2011 produced 2 videos about the Army-Navy Game: A Game of Honor and From Philadelphia to Fallujah, a reminder not only that the men playing in this game are not likely to ever play a down of professional football (a few do), but also of what Bob Feller, who pitched for the Great Lakes Naval Training Center team before becoming a Navy gunner in World War II, said: "Anybody who says sports is war has never been in a war."

During the Game. Unlike most venues in North American sports, an Eagles home game carries with it the specter of fan violence. But although this game is being played in the Eagles' stadium, it will not be an Eagles home game. It is the Army-Navy Game, and it might be the most respectful sports crowd you will ever be in. Both sides take the West Point motto of "Duty, Honor, Country" seriously.

(The Naval Academy's motto is "Ex Scientia Tridens," Latin for "Through Knowledge, Sea Power." For the Army as a whole, it's "This We'll Defend"; for the Navy as a whole, "Semper Fortis," Latin for "Always Courageous." This should not be confused with the mottoes for the Marines, "Semper Fidelis,""Always Faithful"; and the Coast Guard, "Semper Paratus,""Always Ready.")

At Michie Stadium, the Corps of Cadets sits in the northeast corner, identifiable from a distance by their all-gray uniforms, including hats and coats, giving rise to their nickname, "The Long Gray Line."
The Corps of Cadets

At Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium, the Brigade of Midshipmen sits in the northwest corner, identifiable from a distance by their white hats and navy blue coats. At Lincoln Financial Field, each team keeps its usual position: The Cadets in the northeast, the Midshipmen in the northwest, facing each other across the north end zone.
The Brigade of Midshipmen

Each Academy's band -- together when they play each other -- plays the National Anthem, and pretty much anybody who ever served (including each Academy's current students) sings along. The West Point band played the National Anthem prior to the last game at the old Yankee Stadium in 2008, in reference to the Academy's connection to the Stadium.

There is an Army song, and an Army football fight song. The former is "The U.S. Field Artillery March," written by none other than John Philip Sousa, known for its opening verse: "Over hill, over dale, we will hit the dusty trail, as the caissons go rolling along." The latter is "On, Brave Old Army Team": "On, brave old Army team! On to the fray! Fight on to victory, for that's the fearless Army way!"

The Navy uses its traditional "Anchors Aweigh" as its fight song. Charles Zimmerman wrote it in 1906, but the lyrics were officially revised in 1926 and again in 1997. The current version has a chorus of, "Anchors aweigh, my boys, anchors aweigh! Farewell to foreign shores, we sail at break of day-ay-ay-ay! Through our last night ashore, drink to the foam! Until we meet ones more, here's wishing you a happy voyage home!"

But a different version is sung for Navy football games, and, unlike Army, Navy tweaks their rivals in their fight song: "Stand Navy down the field, sails set to the sky! We'll never change our course, so Army, you steer shy-y-y-y! Roll up the score, Navy, anchors aweigh! Sail Navy down the field and sink the Army, sink the Army grey!" (See also: Georgia Tech, and both sides of Texas vs. Texas A&M.)

Traditionally, both teams wear gold helmets, Army's with a black stripe down the middle, Navy's plain gold. However, this is not set in stone. Sometimes, Army will wear black helmets, and Navy might wear blue ones. Sometimes, the helmets will have logos: An A for Army, an N or an anchor for Navy. When Army is the designated home team, their jerseys are black, although sometimes dark gray; when Navy is, theirs are, naturally, navy blue, although sometimes gold; and the visiting team wears white. The players on both teams wear unit logos on their jerseys.

You might think that the Academies would dispense with silliness like cheerleaders and mascots, but both have both. Navy's 1st Bill the Goat (a play on "billy goat") appeared in 1893. Goats don't live as long as many other mascots, so they go through a lot of them. The current mascots are Bill XXXVI and Bill XXXVII.
In the late 1970s, Navy coach George Welsh was asked how good his team was, and tried, as they say in naval circles, an evasive maneuver. Instead of talking about the team, he said, "We're deep at goat." An Army Cadet would say, "That means you stink." Not that the team stinks, but the goats do. And Cadets have, on many occasions, if you'll pardon the pun, kid-napped the Goat.

The Army has used mules as work animals from the beginning, and as football team mascots since 1899, starting because of Navy's already-present goat mascot. Currently, there are 3: Ranger III, Stryker and Paladin.
Image result for Ranger III Army Mule"
Ranger III and Stryker

Each Academy also has a man-in-a-costume mascot. Navy's is also a goat, while Army has both a mule and a Black Knight, and was using the Knight well before the switch from "Cadets" was made official.
Not to be confused with Goat Boy,
Jim Breuer's 1996-98 character on Saturday Night Live.

Not to be confused with Francis the Talking Mule,
and John Cleese's Black Knight from
Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

In the week leading up to the game, a Cadet has to address a higher-ranking person with, "Beat Navy, sir!" and a Midshipman has to do the same with, "Beat Army, sir!" When the game ends, each team walks over to their respective band.

The Cadets and Midshipmen are given a great deal of leeway (by their standards) during the game. I went to the 1998 Rutgers vs. Army game at Rutgers Stadium, and saw the Corps jumping up and down like European soccer fans, even though Rutgers was winning the game 27-15 with a few minutes left. (That was the final score. Neither team had a winning season.)

One year, I forget which, but they were still playing at Veterans Stadium, I was watching the Army-Navy Game on TV, and it was snowing, and Army was winning, and as the clock wound down, there were Cadets standing four abreast, naked from the waist up, swinging their gray coats over their heads. How cold was it? West Point is north of Philly, but not so far north that it's in Canada. They had to have been freezing their epaulets off. I have no idea if they faced any discipline.

The team that loses plays their Academy's Alma Mater first, and the team that wins plays theirs second. In the age of Twitter, the hashtag #SingLast was developed.

After the Game. Philadelphia is a big city, with all the difficulties of big cities as well as many of the perks of them. As this is not an Eagles game, your safety will not be an issue, no matter how many men and women trained in combat are around you.

If you drove down, and you want to stop off for a late dinner and/or drinks (except, of course, for the designated driver), the nearby Holiday Inn at 9th Street & Packer Avenue has a bar that is co-owned by former Eagles quarterback, now ESPN pundit, Ron Jaworski. As I mentioned earlier, the original outlet of Chickie's & Pete's is at 15th & Packer. Right next to it is a celebrated joint, named, appropriately enough, Celebre Pizzeria.

The legendary Pat's and Geno's Steaks, arch-rivals as intense as any local sports opponents, are across 9th Street from each other at Passyunk Avenue in the Italian Market area. My preference is Pat's, but Geno's is also very good. Be advised, though, that the lines at both are of Shake Shack length, because people know they're that good.

Also, Pat's was the original "Soup Nazi": You have to have your cash ready, and you have to quickly order your topping, your style of cheese, and either "wit" or "widdout" -- with or without onions. I haven't been there in a while, but I've been there often enough that I have a "usual": "Mushroom, whiz, wit."

Both Pat's and Geno's are open 24 hours, but, because of the length of the line, unless you drove down to the game, I would recommend not going there after the game, only before (if you can make time for it). Broad Street Line to Ellsworth-Federal, then 5 blocks east on Federal, and 1 block south on 9th.

The Tavern on Broad, at 200 S. Broad Street at Walnut, seems to be the headquarters of the local Giants fan club. Another supposed Giant fan spot is the Fox & Hound, at 1501 Spruce in Center City. Revolution House, in Old City at 200 Market Street, is supposedly Jets country. A particular favorite Philly restaurant of mine is the New Deck Tavern, at 3408 Sansom Street in University City, on the Penn campus.

You can also pick up a sandwich, a snack or a drink at any of several Wawa stores in and around the city. If you came in via Suburban Station, there's one at 1707 Arch, a 5-minute walk away; if the game lasts 3 hours or less, you have a shot at getting in, getting your order, getting out, and getting back to the station in time to catch your train.

The Army-Navy Game starts at 3:00 PM on a Saturday, so there probably aren't any European soccer games of consequence in progress at the time. However, if you do visit Philly during the European soccer season, you can probably watch your favorite club at Fadó Irish Pub, at 1500 Locust Street in Center City. Be advised that this is home to supporters' groups for Manchester United, Liverpool, Tottenham Hotspur and Celtic FC; so if you're not particularly fond of any of those teams, you might want to stay away.

If you go to an Army home game, and want a postgame meal, you'll probably have to head up Route 9W to Cornwall, or head down Route 202 to Stony Point. And if you want to catch a morning (afternoon, Europe time) soccer game, you're probably out of luck: No bar near the Academy shows such games.

It's a different story for Navy home games, as Annapolis is a decent-sized city with lots of restaurants. There is an Annapolis chapter of the American Outlaws, the fan group for the U.S. national soccer team, and they meet at Union Jack's, 2072 Somerville Road, just off the intersection of Routes 50 and 450, about 4 miles west of the Academy.

Sidelights. Aside from the South Philadelphia Sports Complex, the Army-Navy Game was held in Philadelphia at Franklin Field from 1899 to 1904, from 1906 to 1914, in 1922, and from 1932 to 1935.

The current stadium on the site dates to 1923, but the University of Pennsylvania has been playing football on the site since 1895, making it the oldest continuously-used college football site. They have also hosted the Pennsylvania Relay Carnival, or the Penn Relays for short, America's greatest annual track and field meet, since 1895.

The Eagles played there from 1958 to 1970, including the 1960 NFL Championship Game, beating the Green Bay Packers in a day-after-Christmas thriller, 17-13. It would be their last NFL title for 57 years. Penn's football team has been considerably more successful, having won 14 Ivy League titles since the league was formally founded in 1955.

Like the Palestra, the basketball cathedral next door, the stadium at Franklin Field is in surprisingly good shape (must be all those Penn/Wharton Business School grads donating for its upkeep), although the playing field has been artificial turf since 1969. 33rd and Spruce Streets. SEPTA "Subway-Surface Lines" to 33rd Street.

As stated earlier, the Game was played on-campus for Army in 1890 and 1892 on The Plain, and at 1943 at Michie Stadium; and for Navy in 1891 and 1893 at Worden Field, and in 1942 at Thompson Stadium.

It's been held in Baltimore, just 28 miles from Annapolis, making it more of a home game for Navy, in 1924 and 1944 at Municipal Stadium, which would be converted into Memorial Stadium in 1954 (1000 E. 33rd Street, Bus 3 from downtown); and in 2000, 2007, 2014 and 2016 at M&T Bank Stadium 1101 Russell Street, Light Rail to Hamburg Street).

It's been held in the Washington, D.C. area once, on December 10, 2011, a 27-21 Navy win at FedEx Field, home of the Washington Redskins. 1600 FedEx Way, Landover, Maryland, just 24 miles from the Naval Academy, the closest it's been to either Academy since 1943. Metro Blue Line to Morgan Blvd., and then a mile's walk north.

It's been hosted in the New York Tri-State Area 15 times -- 16 if you count Princeton, whose Osborne Field hosted it in 1905, a 6-6 tie. It was replaced as the home of Princeton football in 1914 by Palmer Stadium, and in 1998 by Powers Field. The Engineering Quadrangle was built on the site. Bordered by Nassau and Olden Streets, Prospect Avenue and Murray Place. New Jersey Transit Rail to Princeton, or Coach USA Bus from Port Authority in New York to Palmer Square.

It was held at the Polo Grounds in 1913, 1915, 1916, 1919, 1920, 1921, 1923, 1925 and 1927. The Polo Grounds hosted the baseball New York Giants from 1891 to 1957, the football version from 1925 to 1955, the Yankees from 1913 to 1922, the Mets from 1962 to 1963, and the New York Titans/Jets from 1960 to 1963. A housing project called Polo Grounds Towers was built on the site. 155th Street and 8th Avenue. D Train to 155th Street.

The Game was played at the original Yankee Stadium on December 13, 1930, a 6-0 Army win; and December 12, 1931, a 17-7 Army win. The southwest corner of 161st Street and River Avenue. D Train to 161st Street. The new Stadium is on the northwest corner.

It was played at Giants Stadium in 1989, 1993 and 1997; and at its replacement at the Meadowlands, MetLife Stadium, in 2002. MetLife Stadium will host it again in 2021. (Lincoln Financial Field will host in 2020 and 2022, but, beyond that, it has not been scheduled.) 1 MetLife Stadium Drive, East Rutherford, Bergen County, New Jersey. New Jersey Transit Rail to Meadowlands, or Bus 320 from Port Authority. The Meadowlands, Yankee Stadium, and the site of the Polo Grounds are all about 48 miles from Michie Stadium.

Only twice has the Army-Navy Game been played outside of the Northeast Corridor. On November 27, 1926, it was played, appropriately enough, at the original, then-new, Soldier Field in Chicago, a 21-21 tie. The attendance was said to be over 100,000, a lot more than the 67,000-seat capacity it had from 1970 until its closing in 2001, and that's more than the 61,500 the new one built on the site has had since its 2003 opening. 1410 Museum Campus Drive. Bus 146 from the Loop. And on November 25, 1983, it was played at the Rose Bowl, outside Los Angeles, a 42-13 Navy victory.

I wouldn't be surprised to see the Army-Navy Game one day played outside the U.S., due to the large U.S. military contingents around the world, possibly at Wembley Stadium in London, the Olympiastadion in Berlin, or the new Olympic Stadium in Tokyo. Knowing Donald Trump, if he gets a 2nd term, it could be played at the Luzhniki Stadium in Moscow, or in Dubai.

To sum up: From Michie Stadium to downtown, West Point is 52 miles from New York, 142 miles from Philadelphia, 235 miles from Baltimore, 274 miles from Washington, and 210 miles from Boston. From Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium to downtown, Annapolis is 211 miles from New York, 128 miles from Philadelphia, 31 miles from Baltimore, 30 miles from Washington, and 421 miles from Boston. And the 2 stadiums are 257 miles apart from each other.

*

The Army-Navy Game is one of the great spectacles in American sport. It is a stunning display of pageantry on television. It is even grander in person. If you ever get a chance to go, take it.

How to Be a Devils Fan In Arizona -- 2019-20 Edition

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Why would you want to go to Arizona? Well, if you're a New Jersey Devils fan, they're playing the Arizona Coyotes (formerly the Phoenix Coyotes, and before that the original Winnipeg Jets) this coming Saturday night.

You may not have many more chances to see the Coyotes in their current form, at their current home. With the Islanders now ensconced in Brooklyn, and the Atlanta Thrashers having become the new Winnipeg Jets, the 'Yotes are now the NHL most likely to move.

How likely? They've been in danger of it since at least 2009, and their current arena lease runs only through the end of the current season. The team was sold earlier this year, but new owner Alex Meruelo, the 1st Hispanic majority owner in the NHL, has few ties to Arizona: He was born in New York, grew up in Los Angeles, went to college there, still lives there, owns Fuji Food which is headquartered there, and owns casinos in Nevada. But the L.A. area already has 2 teams, and Las Vegas now has one as well, so if he does move them, it won't be there.

The current Phoenix hockey team is called the Coyotes, and the old one, playing there in the World Hockey Association from 1974 to 1977, was called the Roadrunners. Coyote and Roadrunner. "Meep meep!"

Before You Go. According to a January 30, 2019 article in Thrillist:  

Occasionally, retired Kroger business executives from Ohio and their Pilates-instructor second wives will accidentally move to Flagstaff and get very sad and angry when they realize the average winter temperature is somewhere in the 20s. But most of Arizona offers up that dry desert day heat that is good for arthritis and any lingering guilt about leaving their first wives to deal with their delinquent teenage kids back in Indian Hill.    

AZcentral.com, the website for Phoenix's largest newspaper, the Arizona Republic, is predicting the high 60s for Saturday afternoon, and the high 40s for the evening. So the legendary Arizona "dry heat" won't be an issue. Still, you'll want to bring a jacket for the night.

Arizona's infamous Daylight Savings Time issue has been settled: The State is on Mountain Time when New York is on Daylight Savings Time, and on Pacific Time when we're on Standard Time. This isn't the DST time of year. So you'll be on Mountain Time, 2 hours behind New Jersey and New York City. Adjust your timepieces accordingly.

If you're thinking of making a side trip into Mexico, you should know that it's a 4-hour drive at the least. No public transportation. You'll need a passport, and you'll also need Mexican driving insurance, which you might be able to get at the Mexican consulate in Phoenix. In other words, it's not really worth the trip.

Tickets. The Coyotes averaged 13,989 fans per home game last season. It's only 81.7 percent of their arena's seating capacity. Only the Islanders and the Florida Panthers averaged fewer fans per game, and only those 2, the Ottawa Senators and the Carolina Hurricanes had a lower percentage of capacity. Now who's "a Mickey Mouse operation on the ice," former Coyotes owner Wayne Gretzky?

Getting tickets will not be hard: You could probably show up at the arena box office 5 minutes before puck-drop, and get any ticket you can afford.

With the law of supply and demand, Coyotes tickets are among the cheapest in the NHL. Seats in the lower level, the 100 sections, are $99 between the goals and $79 behind them. In the upper level, the 200 sections, seats are $50 between the goals and $40 behind them, maybe even as low as $26.

Getting There. It's 2,458 miles from Times Square downtown Phoenix, and 2,444 miles from the Prudential Center in Newark to the Gila River Arena in Glendale. In other words, if you're going, you're flying.

You think I'm kidding? Even if you get someone to go with you, and you take turns, one drives while the other one sleeps, and you pack 2 days' worth of food, and you use the side of the Interstate as a toilet, and you don't get pulled over for speeding, you'll still need nearly 2 full days to get there. One way.

But, if you really, really want to... You'll need to get on the New Jersey Turnpike. Take it to Exit 14, to Interstate 78. Follow I-78 west all the way through New Jersey, to Phillipsburg, and across the Delaware River into Easton, Pennsylvania. Continue west on I-78 until reaching Harrisburg. There, you will merge onto I-81. Take Exit 52 to U.S. Route 11, which will soon take you onto I-76. This is the Pennsylvania Turnpike, the nation's first superhighway, opening in 1940.

The Turnpike will eventually be a joint run between I-76 and Interstate 70. Once that happens, you'll stay on I-70, all the way past Pittsburgh, across the little northern panhandle of West Virginia, and then across Ohio, Indiana and Illinois, into Missouri.

At St. Louis, take Exit 40C onto Interstate 44 West, which will take you southwest across Missouri into Oklahoma. Upon reaching Oklahoma City, take Interstate 40 West, through the rest of the State, across the Texas Panhandle and New Mexico, into Arizona.  At Flagstaff, take Interstate 17 South, which will take you into Phoenix. Take Interstate 10 West to Exit 133B, which will lead you to State Route 101. Take Exit 6 to the arena/stadium complex

If you do it right, you should spend about an hour and 15 minutes in New Jersey, 5 hours and 30 minutes in Pennsylvania, 15 minutes in West Virginia, 3 hours and 45 minutes in Ohio, 2 hours and 45 minutes in Indiana, another 2 hours and 45 minutes in Illinois, 5 hours in Missouri, 6 hours in Oklahoma, 3 hours in Texas, 6 hours and 15 minutes in New Mexico, and 5 hours and 30 minutes in Arizona. That's about 42 hours. Counting rest stops, you're probably talking about 55 hours.

That's still faster than Greyhound, averaging around 68 hours, including a 1:45 bus-change in Richmond, a 1:15 stopover in Charlotte, an hour's bus-change in Atlanta, an hour's stopover in Birmingham, a 45-minute stopover in Jackson, Mississippi, an hour's stopover in Shreveport, a 1:30 bus-change in Dallas (that's right, changing buses 3 times each way), and a 1:15 stopover in El Paso.

It's $656 round-trip ($425 with advanced purchase). The station is at 2115 East Buckeye Road, adjacent to Sky Harbor International Airport. Number 13 bus to downtown.

Forget Amtrak. Between the fact that the Sunset Limited, the Jacksonville-to-Los Angeles train, only runs 3 times a week, and a 35-mile distance between Maricopa Station and downtown Phoenix, it just doesn't make sense.

United Airlines can get you round-trip from Newark to Sky Harbor for under $500, but you'll probably have to change planes, most likely in Chicago. 

Once In the City. While the Coyotes (as do MLB's Diamondbacks and the NFL's Cardinals, but not the NBA's Suns) have the State name as their geographic identifier -- apparently from a Native American word meaning "small spring" -- they play in the metropolitan area of Arizona's State capital, Phoenix.

Jack Swilling, a Confederate veteran who founded the place in 1867, accepted the suggestion of a fellow settler, an Englishman named Lord Duppa: Since it was on the site of a previous Indian civilization, it should be named Phoenix, for the mythical bird that rose from its own ashes. The city was incorporated in 1881, making it the youngest city in American major league sports.
The State House in Phoenix

Home to just 100,000 people in 1950, Phoenix saw huge growth in the 2nd half of the 20th Century: 440,000 by 1960, 580,000 by 1970, 800,000 by 1980, and it surpassed the 1 million mark in the early 1990s. It's 1.6 million now, with about 4.6 million people in the metropolitan area.

All this made it an expansion target. The NBA's expansion Suns arrived in 1968. The NFL's St. Louis Cardinals in 1988, changing their name from the Phoenix Cardinals to the Arizona Cardinals in 1993. The USFL's Arizona Wranglers played there in 1984, and became the Arizona Outlaws the following year. This was around the time that the Philadelphia Eagles nearly moved there due to owner Leonard Tose's fractured finances.

The MLB team that became the Diamondbacks was awarded in 1995, to begin play in 1998. And the NHL's 1st Winnipeg Jets became the Phoenix Coyotes in 1997, changing their name to the Arizona Coyotes in 2013. This was after the World Hockey Association had the Phoenix Roadrunners in the 1970s -- and, yes, I'm well aware of the cartoon connection: Roadrunners replaced by Coyotes. The WNBA's Phoenix Mercury also began play in 1997. Today, the Suns are the only Phoenix-area team to keep the city's name as their identifier, rather than the State's name.

The sales tax in Arizona is 5.6 percent, but it's 8.3 percent within the City of Phoenix. ZIP Codes for Arizona start with the digits 85 and 86, and the Area Codes are 602 (for Phoenix), 480 and 623 (for the suburbs). Arizona Public Service provides electricity and water. The Phoenix metropolitan area has a population that is about 58 percent white, 31 percent Hispanic, 5 percent black, 3 percent Asian, and 3 percent Native American. 

Central Avenue is the source street for east-west house numbers; oddly, the north-south streets are numbered Streets to the east, and numbered Avenues to the west. Washington Street divides addresses into north and south. State Route 101 forms a partial "outer beltway," while Interstates 10 (north and east) and 17 (south and west) form an "inner beltway." A single ride on Phoenix buses and Valley Metro Rail is $2.00, with an All-Day Pass a bargain at $4.00. 
A Valley Metro Rail train

Going In. The Glendale Sports & Entertainment District, in the Phoenix suburb of Glendale, consists of State Farm Stadium, home to the Arizona Cardinals since 2006; and the Gila River Arena, home to the Coyotes since 2003. (Until 2018, the stadium was known as University of Phoenix Stadium. There is an actual University of Phoenix, on the ground, not just on the Internet. But that's not here.) 

The complex is about 17 miles northwest of downtown Phoenix. The official address of the stadium is 1 Cardinals Drive, and that of the arena is 9400 W. Maryland Avenue. Number 8 bus from downtown to 7th & Glendale Avenues, then transfer to Number 70 bus, to Glendale and 95th Avenue, then walk down 95th. If you drive in, parking starts at $10.

New York Tri-State Area sports fans know the stadium as the site of Super Bowl XLII, where the Giants derailed the New England Patriots' bid for the NFL's first 19-0 season. The Cardinals defeated the Philadelphia Eagles there in January 2009 to advance to Super Bowl XLIII. The Baltimore Ravens beat the San Francisco 49ers there in Super Bowl XLIX. It is scheduled to host Super Bowl LVII on February 5, 2023.

The stadium is also home to the Fiesta Bowl, and thus has hosted what has amounted to 3 National Championship Games: 2006-07, Florida over Ohio State; 2010-11, Auburn over Oregon; and 2015-16, Alabama over Clemson.

In 2017, it became the 1st building in Arizona to host a Final Four, with North Carolina defeating Gonzaga in the Final. It's hosted 4 matches of the U.S. soccer team, most recently a 3-0 win over Panama.
Gila River Arena, under its former name Jobing.com Arena,
between State Farm Stadium and the Westgate Mall

Formerly the Jobing.com Arena, named for an employment-service website, Gila River Casinos, run by local Native American tribes, now holds naming rights to the arena. The rink is laid out north-to-south. The Coyotes attack twice toward the south end.
Since the Suns' arena is downtown, the Coyotes' arena doesn't get many concert tours. It averages 14 non-hockey events a year -- so, not counting any Playoff games the Coyotes host, that's 55 dates a year, out of 365 days (366 in leap years such as 2016 or 2020). Not good. The stadium is a moneymaker, but the arena is not.

The reason the Coyotes left the downtown arena in the first place is because its retrofit meant losing about 2,000 seats for hockey, resulting in poor revenue, but they don't control this arena, either, and aren't making much money off it. Hence, they may still have to move. If they do, the Glendale Entertainment District might as well just move the arena's concert operations to the stadium and tear the arena down.

Last year, Arizona State University killed a deal for a new arena on ASU's Tempe campus, which would be home to the Coyotes and ASU's basketball team. The Coyotes would've picked up half the cost, and the taxpayers of the State of Arizona the other half.

As I write this, the Coyotes' long-term future in Arizona is once again in doubt. The Suns currently have no plans to leave their 1992-built home, now named the Talking Stick Resort Arena, so they won't be going halfsies with the Coyotes on a new arena.

Food. As a Southwestern city, you might expect Phoenix to have Mexican, Spanish, Western and Southwestern food themes. Which is the case. Tortilla Flats stands are on the Plaza Concourse outside of sections 102 and 230. Chuckwagon Grill, specializing in burgers, has locations on the Plaza Concourse outside of sections 109 and 212. Koko Pollo (chicken) is on the Plaza Concourse outside of section 204.

They also have Papa John's Pizza outside sections 115 and 219; the Yotes Head Pub at 103; Big City Reds Center Ice (hot dogs and chili) at 111, 122, 202 and 2014; Boars Head Deli at 110 and 120; Vienna Beef (hot dogs) at 114 and 217; AZ Cheesesteaks and Sausages at 119 and 227; Taste of Belgium (drinks including Stella Artois beer) at 122; End Cap Bars at 102, 110, 114 and 120; Dreyers Ice Cream (not Breyers) at 111 and 122; and Dippin Dots at 102, 110, 204 and 219.

Team History Displays. As one of the newer teams (due to their move), the Coyotes don't have a lot of history, and they don't hang banners for what they won as the original Winnipeg Jets. Their only championship banner is for their 2012 Pacific Division Championship, when they were still known as the Phoenix Coyotes, the name they used from 1996 to 2014. 
Yup, that's all they got.

This is the only division title the Jets/Coyotes franchise has won in the NHL. Their last one before that was in 1979, when they won the last World Hockey Association Championship. The 2011-12 season is also the only time they've reached the last 4 of the Stanley Cup Playoffs. (The Jets won 3 WHA titles in 4 trips to the Finals.)

The Coyotes have 7 retired numbers, not counting the Number 99 retired through the entire NHL for Wayne Gretzky, who was the team's main owner. All of these, including Gretzky's, are displayed on the Coyotes Ring of Honor.

Center Keith Tkacuk, Number 7, and defenseman Teppo Numminen, Number 27, spanned both Winnipeg and Phoenix. So did the newest honoreed, right wing Shane Doan, Number 19, who debuted in 1996. He retired in 2017, making him the last active member of the old Jets. He recently retired having played more NHL games without winning the Stanley Cup (or even reaching the Finals) than any other player, 1,595 (counting his 55 Playoff games).
Center Jeremy Roenick, Number 97, is the only one featured who played for the franchise only in Phoenix, never in Winnipeg. Left wing Bobby Hull, Number 9; center Dale Hawerchuk, Number 10; and right wing Thomas Steen, Number 25, all played for them only in Winnipeg, never in Phoenix.

Hull and Steen had their numbers retired in Winnipeg, but they were unretired in Phoenix. Still, 10 and 25 have remained unworn. Bobby's son, Brett Hull, briefly played for the Coyotes and wore 9. Clayton Keller wears it now.
Only 2 members of the Hockey Hall of Fame have ever played for the Coyotes since their move to Arizona: Mike Gartner, for 2 seasons, 1996-98; and Brett Hull, briefly, in 2005. (No, Roenick has not yet been elected.) Numminen has been elected to the International Ice Hockey Federation (IIHF) Hall of Fame.

Bobby Hull received the Lester Patrick Trophy for contributions to hockey in America, and was named to The Hockey News' 100 Greatest Players in 1998. He was one of several of the old Winnipeg Jets to be named to the WHA All-Time Team: The others were Ulf and Kent Nilsson, Anders Hedberg, Joe Daley, Lars-Erik Sjoberg, Ernie Wakely, Ted Green and Terry Ruskowski. Robbie Ftorek, who played for the Phoenix Roadrunners, was also named to the WHA All-Time Team. Dave Silk and Dave Christian from the 1980 U.S. Olympic team played for the old Jets.

There is an Arizona Sports Hall of Fame, but the only Coyotes player yet elected to it is Doan. Also in it is Jerry Colangelo, but he's in for what he did with the Suns and, secondarily, the Diamondbacks.

Stuff. The Coyotes' Den is located in the northwest corner of the arena, by Gate 3. You can find the usual team-themed stuff there. Perhaps, due to Arizona's Western heritage, you can find cowboy hats with the team's logo on them.

With hardly any history, there's no team highlight DVDs, and the only book I could find about the team was Laura Winters' entry for them in the NHL's Inside the NHL series, published last year.

During the Game. A November 19, 2014 article on The Hockey News' website ranked the NHL teams' fan bases, and listed the Coyotes' fans 30th in the League -- dead last: "In seats and on Twitter, Dogs' fan base is microscopic despite respectable play."

In other words, they're not nasty fans, or stupid fans; they simply don't have enough fans. Gee, maybe that could be explained by having an arena far from the center of the metropolitan area. Or by the metro area being, you know, in Arizona, a hot-weather city which never should have had an NHL team in the first place!

Wearing Devils gear in Arizona will not endanger your safety. As a franchise only in their 20th season, the Coyotes don't really have a rivalry yet; and if they did, it wouldn't be with the Devils. For the most part, Arizona fans are okay, not making trouble for fans of teams playing the NFL Cardinals, NBA Suns or MLB's Diamondbacks, either. In fact, their biggest rivalry is intrastate: The University of Arizona vs. Arizona State University. It's a heated rivalry... but it's a dry heat.

The Friday game against the Devils will not feature a promotion. Patrick Lauder has sung the National Anthem for the Coyotes since the return from the lockout in 2005, after having done so several times since the team's arrival in 1996. The goal song is "Howlin' for You" by the Black Keys.
Patrick Lauder wearing a Coyotes throwback jersey

The mascot is Howler the Coyote. He wears uniform Number 96, in honor of the team's 1996 arrival. He seems to think the Coyotes do have a rivalry, with the Anaheim Ducks. And he does kind of look like Wile E. Coyote, albeit not nearly as thin and with shorter ears.
Arizona fans have their own Southwestern spin on the Detroit tradition of throwing an octopus onto the ice: They throw rubber snakes. At least, I hope they're rubber, and not real.

After the Game. Be advised that outgoing traffic from this game may run into incoming traffic for the NFL Playoff game in which the Cardinals will host the Green Bay Packers.

Phoenix does have crime issues, but you should be safe as long as you stay downtown. What's more, the arena is in the suburbs. It's incredibly unlikely that Coyote fans will bother you, and the fact that the Devils aren't rivals to them helps.

This is a matinee, so the Westgate Mall, to the north across Coyotes Blvd., will be open after the game if you want to do some postgame dining or shopping. A McFadden's is outside the arena at the northwest corner, and a Saddle Ranch Chophouse at the northeast corner.

As for anything New York-friendly, the closest I can come at this time is a place called Tim Finnegan's, the local Jets fan hangout, but that's 11 miles north of downtown, at 9201 North 29th Avenue. It appears that the local football Giants fan club meets at the Blue Moose, at 7373 East Scottsdale Mall, 13 miles northeast of downtown. I've also heard that Loco Patron, at 1327 E. Chandler Blvd., is a Giants fan hangout, but that's 21 miles south. I've read that a Yankee Fan hangout is at LagerFields Sports Grill, at 12601 N. Paradise Village Pkwy. W., 14 miles northeast of downtown. Alas, I can find nothing Mets-specific in the area.

If you visit Phoenix during the European soccer season, as we are now in, the best "football pub" in Arizona is the George & Dragon Pub, which opens at 7:00 AM on matchdays. 4240 N. Central Avenue, about 3 miles north of downtown. Bus 13 to Buckeye Road & Central Avenue, then transfer to Bus ZERO to Farrington Lane. Unless you're a Liverpool fan, or you'd prefer to stay downtown, in which case you can go to the Rose and Crown, at 628 E. Adams Street, 2 blocks north of the ballpark.

Sidelights. Phoenix's sports history is relatively brief, and not very successful. But there are some notable locations.

* Chase Field and Talking Stick Resort Arena. The capital of Arizona sports is 2 buildings separated by 2 blocks and the Jefferson Street Garage, which provides parking for both.

The Arizona Diamondbacks have played since their 1998 inception at Chase Field, a retractable-roof stadium, originally named Bank One Ballpark, and having that name during what remains the Diamondbacks' only World Series thus far, 2001. It looks like a big airplane hangar, without much atmosphere. True, there is that pool in the right-center-field corner... but what's a pool doing at a ballpark?

Major League Baseball is now concerned enough about developments at Chase Field that it might force the Diamondbacks to move.

The Talking Stick Resort Arena, previously known as the US Airways Center and the AmericaWest Arena for a previous airline, it is 2 blocks west of Chase Field, at 2nd & Jefferson. The Suns have played here since 1992, and the WNBA's Phoenix Mercury since 1997. The Coyotes played here from 1996 to 2003.
Chase Field, with Talking Stick Resort Arena
behind it and to the left

The arena's address is 201 E. Jefferson Street, and the ballpark's is 401 E. Jefferson Street. Both buildings can be reached on Metro Light Rail via the Jefferson Street & 3rd Street station.

* Arizona Veterans Memorial Coliseum. The Grand Canyon State's 1st home to big-league sports, opening in 1965, was home to the Suns from their 1968 arrival until 1992, and to the World Hockey Association's Phoenix Roadrunners from 1974 to 1977.

Elvis Presley sang at the Coliseum on September 9, 1970, and again on April 22, 1973. Early in his career, on June 9, 1956, he sang at a grandstand at the adjoining Arizona State Fairgrounds. The next day, he sang at the Rodeo Grounds in Tucson. He also sang at the Tucson Community Center on November 9, 1972 and June 1, 1976. (While individual ex-Beatles have performed in Arizona, the band as a whole did not do so on any of their 3 North American tours.)

The Coliseum still stands, and is part of the State Fairgrounds. 1826 W. McDowell Road. Northwest of downtown. Number 15 bus to 15th & McDowell, then 3 blocks west.

* Phoenix Municipal Stadium. This ballpark was home to the Phoenix Giants/Firebirds from its opening in 1964 until 1991, and is the current spring training home of the Oakland Athletics, the Diamondbacks' Rookie League team, and Arizona's State high school baseball championship. 5999 E. Van Buren Street. East of downtown, take the Light Rail to Priest Drive/Washington station, then a short walk up Priest.

* Scottsdale Stadium. This stadium was home to the Firebirds in their last years, 1992 to 1997. Its seating capacity of 12,000, 4,000 more than Phoenix Municipal, was meant to showcase the Phoenix area as a potential major league market. It's the San Francisco Giants' spring training site, and replaced a previous stadium on the site that dated to 1956, used as a spring training home for the Giants, A's, Red Sox, Orioles and Cubs -- sometimes all at the same time.

Because it was the Cubs' spring training home, thus leading to Phoenix becoming "Chicago's Miami," where retirees from the city tend to go (paging Michael Wilbon of the Washington Post & ESPN's Pardon the Interruption & NBA coverage), it was where former Cub catcher Randy Hundley hosted the very first baseball fantasy camp. As Met fans, you might remember Randy's furious reaction to Tommie Agee scoring on a controversial umpiring call at home plate at Shea in September 1969. You might also remember Randy's son, former Met catcher Todd Hundley.

7408 E. Osborn Road, at Drinkwater Boulevard. Northeast of downtown. Light Rail to Veterans Way/College station, then transfer to Number 72 bus to Osborn, then walk 2 blocks east.

* Arizona State University. The University of Arizona is 114 miles away in Tuscon, but ASU is just a 24-minute Light Rail ride from downtown. The station is at 5th Street & Veterans Way, and is 2 blocks away from Sun Devil Stadium and the Wells Fargo Arena, home to their football and basketball teams, respectively.

Sun Devil Stadium was built in 1958, and ASU still plays there rather than move to the larger, more modern (but well off-campus) University of Phoenix Stadium. The Cardinals played there from 1988 to 2005, and the Fiesta Bowl was held there from 1971 to 2006. This included what amounted to the National Championship Game 5 times: 1986-87, Penn State over Miami; 1988-89, Notre Dame over West Virginia; 1995-96, Nebraska over Florida; 1998-99, Tennessee over Florida State; and 2002-03, Ohio State over Miami.

The Dallas Cowboys treated it as a second home field when they played the Cardinals (mainly because there always seemed to be more Cowboy fans there), and won Super Bowl XXX there, when the world learned A) it was possible for the Pittsburgh Steelers to lose a Super Bowl, and B) Terry Bradshaw was smart compared to Neil O'Donnell. It also hosted 2 U.S. soccer team matches in the 1990s.


The Wells Fargo Arena was previously known as the ASU Activity Center. Elvis sang there on March 23, 1977.

Packard Stadium, opened in 1974, is home to the ASU baseball program, one of the most successful college baseball teams, east of the stadium and arena, at Rural Road and Rio Salado Parkway. The Sun Devils have won 5 National Championships, most recently in 1981. Their legends include Reggie Jackson, Barry Bonds, and current stars Dustin Pedroia and Andre Ethier. Notable ASU and Met alumni include Gary Gentry, Duffy Dyer, Lenny Randle, Craig Swan, Hubie Brooks, Paul Lo Duca and Ike Davis.

ASU’s Gammage Auditorium, at the other end of the campus, hosted one of the 2004 Presidential Debates between George W. Bush and John Kerry. 1200 S. Forest Avenue.

The US Airways Center, Wells Fargo Arena, University of Phoenix Stadium, and the University of Arizona's McKale Center have all hosted NCAA basketball tournament games. UA has been in the Final Four in 1988, 1994, 1997 and 2001, winning it all in 1997; but ASU has never gotten any closer than the Sweet 16, in 1995.

The highest-ranking pro soccer team in Arizona is Phoenix Rising FC, in the United Soccer League, our 2nd division. They play at the rather unimaginatively-named Phoenix Rising FC Soccer Complex, which seats 6,200. 751 N. McClintock Drive, in Scottsdale, 10 miles east of downtown Phoenix. It takes 4 buses over 2 hours to get there, so if you don't have a car, forget it. 

Presuming Major League Soccer's current expansion wave passes Phoenix by, the closest MLS teams are the 2 in Los Angeles, 375 (LAFC) and 376 (LA Galaxy) miles to the west, respectively. The San Jose Earthquakes and Real Salt Lake are considerably further away.

* Arizona Science Center. Phoenix is not a big museum center. And while there have been Native Americans living in Phoenix for thousands of years, and Spaniards/Mexicans for hundreds, its Anglo history is rather short. No Arizonan has ever become President (although Senators Barry Goldwater and John McCain got nominated), so there's no Presidential Library or Museum. And it doesn't help history buffs that the city only goes back to 1867, and Statehood was gained only in 1912. But the Science Center is at 4th & Washington, just a block from the ballpark. And Arizona State has a renowned Art Museum.

The tallest building in Phoenix, and in all of Arizona, is the Chase Tower, bounded by Central Avenue and Van Buren, 1st and Monroe Streets. That it's only 483 feet, and that no taller building has been built in the city since it opened in 1972, says something about this city, but I'm not sure what. But the city seems to be intent on growing outward, not upward.

Television shows set in Phoenix, or anywhere in Arizona, are few and far between. The High Chaparral, another Western created by Bonanza creator David Dortort, ran on NBC from 1967 to 1971, and is fondly remembered by some. Medium was set in the Maricopa County District Attorney's office in Phoenix.

But the best-remembered show is Alice, starring Linda Lavin as one of several waitresses at fictional Mel's Diner, running on CBS from 1976 to 1985. Although the show was taped in Hollywood (Burbank, actually), that once-famous "14-ounce coffee cup" sign is still used outside a real working diner in Phoenix. It was Lester's, until the owner agreed to change the name to "Mel's Diner" for the publicity. Today, it's Pat's Family Diner, at 1747 NW Grand Avenue, 2 miles northwest of downtown. Number 15 bus to 15th Avenue & Pierce Street, and then walk one block east to Grand, Pierce, and 12th. There are also still-in-business diners in Ohio and Florida that use the same sign design. "Pickup!"

Movies set in modern-day Arizona usually show the Grand Canyon or the Hoover Dam. Notable on this list is Thelma & Louise, in which Geena Davis and Susan Sarandon drive a 1966 Ford Thunderbird into the Canyon rather than be captured by the FBI, enacting a distaff version of Butch Cassidy & the Sundance KidNational Lampoon's Vacation and Natural Born Killers also used Arizona as a backdrop.

The vast majority of movies set in Arizona have been Westerns, including the 1957 and 2007 versions of 3:10 to Yuma, the 1950 film Broken Arrow (not the later John Travolta film of the same title), Fort Apache (not the later Paul Newman film set in The Bronx), Paul Newman's Hombre, Johnny Guitar, A Million Ways to Die In the West, No Name On the Bullet, and all the films based on the 1881 Earps vs. Clantons gunfight, including My Darling Clementine in 1946, Gunfight at the O.K. Corral in 1957, Tombstone in 1993 and Wyatt Earp in 1994. While not a Western, Revenge of the Nerds was filmed at the University of Arizona, in Tucson.

If you're a Western buff, and you want to see the site of the legendary gunfight, the official address is 326 East Allen Street, Tombstone, AZ 85638. Reenactments are held daily. Be advised, though, that it's 184 miles southeast of downtown Phoenix, a 3-hour drive, and ain't no Greyhound or Amtrak service, stranger. It's also just 50 miles from the Mexican border.

And the other 2 things in Arizona that everybody talks about? The Grand Canyon Skywalk is 262 miles northwest of downtown Phoenix, and Hoover Dam 269 miles. They're 96 road miles apart, but about half that as the crow flies. 

*

If you go to Phoenix to see the Devils play the Coyotes, you won't be subjected to Arizona's usual intense heat, and you can probably see a hockey game relatively cheap. Have fun!

Ranking the Yankees' Seasons: Part I, #'s 117 to 81

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1st of a 4-part series. Key:

1903 to 1968: Had to win the American League Pennant to reach the postseason, which consisted only of the World Series, which was a best-4-out-of-7, except in 1919, 1920 and 1921, when it was a best-5-out-of-9..

1969 to 1984: Had to win the AL Eastern Division to reach the postseason, first the AL Championship Series, which was then a best-3-out-of-5, and then the World Series.

1985 to 1993: Still had to win the AL East, but the ALCS was now a best-4-out-of-7.

1995 to 2010: With the postseason canceled in 1994, had to win the AL East, or to have the best record of any AL team that didn't win its Division, to win the AL Wild Card berth, to make the AL Division Series, a best-3-out-of-5. The ALCS and the World Series remained a best-4-out-of-7.

2011 to present: The top 2 AL teams that didn't win their Divisions played a Wild Card Game against each other, with the winner advancing to the ALDS.

So here's the start of the list:

117. 1912. 102 losses, a team-record-low .329 "winning" percentage, and a team-record 55 games out of 1st place. The highlight of the season was playing the Boston Red Sox in the opening game of Fenway Park, which was announced as a benefit for the survivors of the sinking of the RMS Titanic 6 days before. The Yankees lost, but ruined the 100th Anniversary game in 2012.

This was the last season with the team using the name of the New York Highlanders. They had been nicknamed the Yankees almost since the beginning. The 1913 season would make it official. It was also the last season at their 1st home field, Hilltop Park.

116. 1908. A team-record 103 losses, 39 1/2 games out of 1st.

115. 1913. 7th place, 38 games out. This was the 1st season sharing the Polo Grounds with the New York Giants.

114. 1915. 5th place, 32 1/2 games out. The 1st season under the ownership of Jacob Ruppert and Tillinghast L'Hommedieu Huston. It would take a while to work. But they did make the 1st big Yankee acquisition, pitcher Bob Shawkey.

113. 1914. 6th place, 30 games out.

112. 1917. 6th place, 28 1/2 games out. Afterward, Ruppert (against Huston's wishes) signed Miller Huggins to manage.

111. 1925. 7th place, 28 1/2 games out, but with hope. This was a true "rebuilding year." Several players from the 1921-23 Champions had to be replaced, and were. At 1st base: Wally Pipp out, Lou Gehrig in. At 2nd base: Aaron Ward out, and, the next season, Tony Lazzeri in. At shortstop: Everett Scott out, Mark Koenig in. At center field: Whitey Witt out, Earle Combs in.

110. 1911. 6th place, 25 1/2 games out.

109. 1909. 5th place, 23 1/2 games out.

108. 1990. 7th place out of 7, the only Yankee last-place finish of my lifetime, 21 games out.

107. 1966. 10th place out of 10, last, the lowest finish in club history. 26 1/2 games out. Why is this one better than the last few entries? Because there were still some legends, like Mantle and Ford.

106. 1967. 9th, 20 games out, only slightly more optimistic than the preceding season.

105. 1969. 5th, 28 1/2 games out, and, for the 1st time in half a century, since the arrival of Ruth, no great legend, as Mantle had retired. Munson arrived, and Murcer and Stottlemyre were there, but don't kid yourselves that they were at that level.

104. 1965. 6th, 25 games out, the year the Dynasty collapsed.

103. 1905. 6th, 21 1/2 games out.

102. 1907. 5th, 21 games out.

101. 1971. 4th, 21 games out.

100. 1991. 5th, 20 games out, but the climb out of the abyss had begun.

99. 1992. 4th, 20 games out, and a 5-game improvement over the year before. It looked like things were happening.

98. 1945. 4th, 6 1/2 games out.

97. 1944. 3rd, 6 games out. These last 2 seasons saw the Yankees, and every other team, depleted by the manpower drain of World War II. The fact that the Yankees were able to go 81-73 in '44 and 83-71 in '45 is noteworthy, but not that much.

96. 1968. 5th, 20 games out, and 83 wins was certainly an improvement over the preceding 3 seasons, but not much hope, as we could tell that this was it for Mantle.

95. 1982. 5th, 16 games out, another year of dynasty collapse. The year before had been a Pennant. It had been 5 Division titles in 6 years, and at least being in the Pennant race as late as late September in 7 out of 8 seasons. This season? 79-83. Dave Winfield had a great season, but he was pretty much the only player who had even a good one.

94. 1989. 5th, 14 1/2 games out, and the end of what seemed like a revival from 1983 through 1988. Winfield missed the entire season due to injury, Don Mattingly went from being the best player in baseball (or so we thought) to being a chronic injury case, Ron Guidry had to retire, yet another of George Steinbrenner's managerial changes... It was a mess, all around.

93. 1973. 4th, 17 games out. The 1st year of the Steinbrenner regime began with a lot of hope, but George's antics became a distraction, and a team that was in the race at the start of August took a nosedive. The closing of the Stadium for a 2-year renovation also made it depressing.

92. 1918. 4th, 13 1/2 games out. The 1st year of Miller Huggins' managerial tenure showed improvement. Yankee Fans weren't yet trained to expect big things, despite the pronouncements of owners Jacob Ruppert and Til Huston. They had no idea what was coming.

91. 1979. 4th, 13 1/2 games out. The death of Thurman Munson is what everybody remembers from this year. But it was also the year Goose Gossage and Cliff Johnson got into a fight, injuring the Goose, leading Guidry to volunteer for the bullpen, taking him out of the rotation. Mickey Rivers was traded in midseason.

Other injuries -- including to Munson, who was pretty much done as a catcher even before his crash -- meant that the Yankees were never really in the race, arguably the only time between 1972 and 1981 that this was true.

90. 1959. 3rd, 15 games out. At 79-75, this was the worst Yankee season by record between 1925 and 1965. There were lots of injuries, and, statistically, just about everybody had an off-year. It didn't help that, due to the Dodgers and Giants leaving after 1957, the Yankees were all alone in The City and had the entire baseball focus on them.

After the season, the trade for Roger Maris was made, and the switch was made with Yogi Berra going to left field and Elston Howard to catcher, and a new Pennant string was born.

89. 1946. 3rd, 17 games out. The 1st year after World War II was a tough transition year for the team, as Joe DiMaggio and Phil Rizzuto both struggled to regain their stroke, and Charlie Keller hurt his back, curtailing what could have been a Hall of Fame career.

And it was the year Joe McCarthy, the greatest Yankee manager to that point, left. But it was also the debut of Yogi Berra and Vic Raschi, and the year Yankee Stadium got lights.

88. 2016. 4th, 9 games out, 5 from the 2nd AL Wild Card. In late July, the Yankees were close. The strength of the team was the hitting of Carlos Beltran, and a bullpen with Dellin Betances, Andrew Miller and Aroldis Chapman. So what did general manager Brian Cashman do as the trading deadline approached? Traded all of those except Betances, and also Ivan Nova, a decent starting pitcher. All for "prospects" which, over 2 years later, have failed to bring the Yankees a Pennant.

An absolute surrender, which was absolutely unnecessary, and is unacceptable. To make matters worse, these trades resulted in 3 Pennants -- 1 for Chicago, 1 for Cleveland, 1 for Houston (2 for them, if you count Cashman's inaction on Justin Verlander, Zack Greinke and Gerrit Cole), and none for New York.

87. 2014. 3rd, 12 games out, 4 from the 2nd AL Wild Card. Derek Jeter's farewell, as well-managed by the club as it was, couldn't cover up the fact that the Yankees never seemed likely to make the Playoffs.

86. 1916. 4th, 11 games out. The 2nd year of the Ruppert-Huston regime was little better than the 1st.

85. 2013. 4th, 12 games out, 6 1/2 from the 2nd AL Wild Card. Mariano Rivera's farewell, as well-managed by the club as it was, couldn't cover up the fact that the Yankees missed the Playoffs for only the 2nd time since the Strike of '94.

84. 1984. 3rd, 17 games out. The Detroit Tigers ran away with the the AL East, winning 35 of their 1st 40, so there was never a race. But with no pressure on them, the Yankees played some quality baseball, including the battle title race between Don Mattingly (finishing at .343) and Dave Winfield (.340). By Met standards, it would be a season worth still talking about 34 years later. (Of course, it was also a season in which the Mets actually did "take back New York.")

83. 1903. 4th, 17 games out. The 1st season, and, while the New York Highlanders never seriously challenged the Boston Americans (Red Sox) for the Pennant, having 3 genuine Hall-of-Famers (not that there was a Hall of Fame until 1936) in pitcher-manager Clark Griffith, pitcher Jack Chesbro, and right fielder Willie Keeler showed that the New York club of the American League meant business. So there was lots of reason to hope.

82. 1910. 2nd, 14 1/2 games out. The Philadelphia Athletics ran away with the Pennant. Still, the Yankees had a talented team -- but with a dark cloud hanging over it. Hal Chase was the best 1st baseman in baseball at the time, but manager George Stallings accused him of throwing games. Chase went to owners Frank Farrell and Bill Devery, and told them. Stallings said either Chase goes or I go. Not only did the owners side with Chase, but made him the new manager. Disgraceful.

81. 1987. 4th, 9 games out. In July, Sports Illustrated had a cover showing a perplexed Darryl Strawberry and a determined Don Mattingly. It read: "NEW YORK, NEW YORK: The Mets are feuding, the Yanks are flying." Right after that, Dave Winfield and Willie Randolph both got hurt, and the Yankees fell out of 1st place, never to return.

Part II follows.

Ranking the Yankees' Seasons: Part II, #'s 80 to 56

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80. 2008. 3rd, 8 games out, 6 games out of the Wild Card. The last season for the original Yankee Stadium had its moments, but it was the only time the Yankees finished outside the Playoffs between 1993 and 2013. (There was no finish in 1994.)

79. 1975. 3rd, 12 games out. After the close call for the Division in 1974, the signing of Catfish Hunter, and the trade for Barry Bonds, this was the most optimistic Yankee season since 1964. And at the All-Star Break, on July 12, they were only 3 1/2 games back. But they were 10 back on July 27, and never recovered, getting no closer than 8 1/2 back on August 8. After the season, Bonds was traded for Mickey Rivers and Ed Figueroa.

78. 1972. 4th, 6 1/2 games out. A strike that wiped out the 1st few games of the season meant that things never really felt like they got going. It also made this the only season since 1945 that the Yankees haven't drawn at least 1 million fans at home.

Nevertheless, the Yankees were close most of the way. A 4-game winning streak got them within half a game of 1st place on September 12. But they followed that going 7-12 the rest of the way, including a 1-6 stretch and closed with a 5-game losing streak. Of the 17 games they lost in September and October, 10 were by 1 or 2 runs.

77. 1970. 2nd, 15 games out. Their 93 wins was their best total between 1964 and 1976, but the Baltimore Orioles ran away with the Division. This was the high-water mark of the Dark Age of Bobby Murcer, Horace Clarke, Gene Michael as a player, Mel Stottlemyre, and, in his only 20-win season, Fritz Peterson.

76. 1929. 2nd, 18 games out.

75. 1930. 3rd, 16 games out.

74. 1931. 2nd, 13 1/2 games out. In each of these 3 seasons, the Yankees were really good, and had Babe Ruth and Lou Gehrig, but the Philadelphia Athletics ran away with the Pennant. I put 1929 the lowest of these because of the death of Miller Huggins at the end of the season, the only Yankee manager ever to die in office.

73. 1954. 2nd, 8 games out. The 1 time in a Major League Baseball career that began as a player in 1912 and ended as a manager in 1965 that Casey Stengel won 100 games (103, to be precise), and it wasn't enough, because the Cleveland Indians won 111, breaking the record of the 1927 Yankees, holding it until the 1998 Yankees, and ended the Yankees' streak of 5 straight Pennants and World Series wins. Yogi Berra won the MVP, but it didn't matter. The fact that another New York team, the Giants, won the World Series, didn't help.

72. 1919. 3rd, 7 1/2 games out. The lst real Pennant race of the Ruppert ownership, and the last year before the Ruth acquisition turned the Yankees from hoping to win to expecting to do so.

71. 1983. 3rd, 7 games out. Billy Martin's 3rd tenure as manager, and he won 91 games with a team that really didn't have enough pitching. But the Orioles led most of the way. The Yankees beat them on September 9 to close within 4 games, but the O's took the next 3, and that was that.

70. 1993, 2nd, 7 games out. This was the beginning of the 1996-2003 Dynasty built by Gene Michael: The 1st season in Pinstripes for Paul O'Neill, Wade Boggs and Jimmy Key; and the blossoming of Bernie Williams. On September 5, the Yankees were tied for 1st with the Toronto Blue Jays. But a 4-game losing streak began a 10-14 run. The next great Yankee team still needed some additions.

69. 1933. 2nd, 7 games out.

68. 1934. 2nd, 7 games out. The last 2 years of Babe Ruth saw the Yankees win 91 and 94 games, respectively. In 1934, Lou Gehrig won the batting Triple Crown, and Lefty Gomez won the pitching Triple Crown, his 26 wins still more than any Yankee pitcher since. (Whitey Ford in 1961 and Ron Guidry in 1978 won 25.) But the Washington Senators won the Pennant in '33, the Tigers in '34.

67. 1935. 2nd, 3 games out. The transition year, with Gehrig, but with Ruth gone and Joe DiMaggio not yet arrived. A 7-game winning streak near the end nearly salvaged the season, but losing 3 out of a rare 5-game series at home in mid-September pretty much ended it.

66. 1986. 2nd, 5 1/2 games out. Don Mattingly set a Yankee record for hits in a season that still stands, Dave Winfield remained an RBI machine, and Dave Righetti set a major league record with 46 saves (which stood for 4 years).

But the starting rotation fell woefully short, The Yankees were 4 games behind the Red Sox on August 16, but a 4-game losing streak at home put an end to serious hopes. They were 9 1/2 back before a 4-game season-finale sweep at Fenway Park, one that no one was willing to call a "Boston Massacre," because the Sox had already clinched.

65. 1988. 5th, 3 1/2 games out. The last real 5-team Pennant race in baseball. In spite of an early injury crisis that made 2019 look like a healthy season, and ended Billy Martin's 5th and last run as manager, the Yankees were in it almost the whole way under the 2nd run of Lou Piniella. But dropping 3 out of 4 at Fenway was a killer, as the Red Sox won the Division by 1 game over Detroit, and 2 each over Milwaukee and Toronto.

64. 1940. 3rd, 2 games out. The 1 season between 1936 and 1943 that the Yankees didn't win the Pennant. DiMaggio won his 2nd straight batting title, but a few guys had supbar seasons, and the Tigers edged the Indians and the Yankees for the Pennant.

63. 1974. 2nd, 2 games out. The closest call since the last Pennant of the Old Dynasty, and the last gasp for Stottlemyre and the 1st run of Murcer. The Orioles were just too tough.

62. 1985. 2nd, 2 games out. The team was 6-12 on April 30, and George Steinbrenner fired Yogi Berra as manager. That it needed to be done could be justified; how, cannot. But on came Billy Martin for his 4th tenure, and, given that he never had a full starting rotation, getting this team to 97-64 may have been his best managing job. After being 9 1/2 games out on August 4, he got them to a game and a half out in the opener of a 4-game series with the Blue Jays on September 12.

But they lost the last 3, starting an 8-game losing streak, then won 8 of 9 to get back in it. They had to sweep the Jays in Toronto to set up a Playoff, won on Friday night, but lost on Saturday afternoon before winning the now-meaningless Sunday game, ending an MVP season for Don Mattingly. This one still bugs me: One more win against the Jays, and who knows?

Book about this season: Doc, Donnie, the Kid, and Billy Brawl: How the 1985 Mets and Yankees Fought for New York's Baseball Soul, by Chris Donnelly, published earlier this year. "Doc" was Dwight "Doctor K" Gooden. "The Kid" was Gary Carter. The Yankees lost that battle, and would not regain New York's baseball soul until 1993 -- maybe 1996.

61. 1906. 2nd, 3 games out. A good job by the standards of the pre-Ruppert years (1903-14), including the New York Highlanders years (1903-12). The fact that it was the Chicago White Sox and their "Hitless Wonders" made this fallshort frustrating.

60. 1920. 2nd, 3 games out. A tough race won by Cleveland, with Chicago also finishing ahead, complicated by the White Sox having 8 players suspended (and eventually banned for life) for throwing the previous season's World Series. This was Babe Ruth's 1st year in New York, and his 54 home runs, nearly doubling the record he already held, took the sting out of it.

59. 1948. 3rd, 2 1/2 games out. Boston and Cleveland finished in a tie for the Pennant, with the Indians winning a 1-game Playoff at Fenway. The Yankees were in it until the next-to-last day of the season, losing at Fenway, before beating the Sox to set up the Playoff.

58. 1924. 2nd, 2 games out. Another great year for Ruth, but a streak of 3 straight Pennants ended. That it was the long-suffering Washington Senators, winning their 1st Pennant, who topped the Yankees, softened the blow, as did the fact that the Yankees had won the World Series for the 1st time the year before.

57. 1904. 2nd, 1 1/2 games out. The 2nd season for the Highlanders, their 1st Pennant race. and the 1st big showdown between the teams that would become known as the Yankees (in 1913) and the Red Sox (in 1907). Going into the last day of the season, they had to sweep a doubleheader with the Boston Americans at Hilltop Park in Upper Manhattan to win the Pennant. Lose either game, and they're beaten.

Jack Chesbro had won 41 games, still a record with the post-1892 pitching distance of 60 feet, 6 inches. But with the opener tied in the 9th, he threw a wild pitch that let the Pennant-winning run score. As would happen in Toronto 81 years later, the finale would be meaningless and the Yankees would win it anyway.

Book about this season: The Year They Called Off the World Series: A Try Story, by Benton Stark. Published in 1991, 3 years before another World Series would be called off.

56. 1994. led the American League Eastern Division when the Strike of '94 hit. This was Don Mattingly's best chance, and we'll never know.

Part III follows. From here on out, each of these seasons was, at least, a Playoff season.

Ranking the Yankees' Seasons: Part III, #'s 55 to 28

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In each of these seasons, the Yankees made the postseason, but did not win the World Series.

55. 2015. reached the AL Wild Card Game, lost it to the Houston Astros. There was some optimism going into this one, but it was a total capitulation. The fact that the Astros have now won 2 Pennants in the following 4 seasons does not mitigate this one.

54. 2007. won the AL Wild Card, lost the ALDS to the Cleveland Indians. Game 2 was The Bug Game. Had we just gotten 1 more run before the bugs hit, it would have set up an ALCS showdown with the Red Sox. But once the bugs hit, it was over. We just didn't hit in this series.

53. 2018. Won the AL Wild Game Game vs. the Cleveland Indians, lost the ALDS to the Boston Red Sox. Taking Game 2 at Fenway gave us a lot of hope going into Game 3 at Yankee Stadium II. But we lost 16-1, and then Game 4 was kind of a damp squib, too. For the 2nd time, the 1st being in 2004, the Red Sox clinched a postseason series on our field.

52. 1995. Won the AL Wild Card, lost the ALDS to the Seattle Mariners. Donnie Baseball's Last Stand. After a hard season that saw 2 Yankee Legends dented -- the death of Mickey Mantle and Lou Gehrig's playing streak record broken by Cal Ripken -- and a 2nd place finish to Boston, we took a 2-0 lead in the ALDS, and then dropped 3 straight in the Kingdome, Games 4 and 5 being winnable classics.

For the Cult of St. Donald Arthur of Evansville, this was heartbreaking. I just felt empty. There was such an air of finality about it. If you had told me then that the Yankees would win 6 Pennants in the next 8 years, I would have taken it, but I wouldn't have believed you.

51. 1997. Won the AL Wild Card, lost the ALDS to the Cleveland Indians. Despite blowing a 2-1 lead, this one didn't hurt as much, because of the previous year's title.

50. 2006. Won the AL Eastern Division, lost the ALDS to the Detroit Tigers. The 5-game sweep at Fenway, followed by the Red Sox falling to 3rd behind us and Toronto, felt really good. That's what made the disintegration of the bats so much more pathetic. Joe Torre batting Alex Rodriguez 8th in the order angered many, but it was completely justified. Not that anybody else hit much, either.

49. 2005. Won the AL East, lost the ALDS to the Los Angeles Angels. Given the emotions of the previous 2 seasons, ending with a win and then a loss against the Red Sox, this year's race with them was exhausting in every way. I can't really fault the Yankees for falling flat against the Halos, especially since they ended up losing to the White Sox, who on their 1st World Series in 88 years.

48. 2011. Won the AL East, lost the ALDS to the Detroit Tigers. Another disappearing act by the Yankee bats, and Ivan Nova's injury forced Joe Girardi to take him out after the 1st inning of Game 5, making it feel like we'd already lost in Game 4. This team should have won: Big years from big names, and the Yankees winning the Pennant instead of the Texas Rangers and the World Series instead of the St. Louis Cardinals wouldn't have denied a worthy team in either case.

47. 2002. Won the AL East, lost the ALDS to the Anaheim Angels. (The name was changed back to "Los Angeles" in 2004.) After 5 Pennants in 6 years, this loss didn't sting as much, but we still should have hit better.

46. 2004. Won the AL East, won the ALDS over the Minnesota Twins, lost the ALCS to the Boston Red Sox after being up 3-0. The worst loss in Yankee history, in terms of both how close we came to winning and in how badly it made us feel. Although losing the 2000 World Series to the Mets would have been 10 times worse. This season still ranks ahead of any season in the post-1968 Divisional Play Era where we didn't make the ALCS, but it is the worst loss.

45. 1980. Won the AL East, lost the ALCS to the Kansas City Royals. The 1st 3 against the Royals, 1976, '77 and '78, were not easy, but they should have given the Yankees enough confidence to win in '80 as well. But it was already a different team: Gone were Thurman Munson, Chris Chambliss, Mickey Rivers, Catfish Hunter, Ed Figueroa and Sparky Lyle. And the Royals were what the Yankees no longer were: Hungry. So they swept us in 3 straight. Embarrassing.

44. 2010. Won the AL Wild Card, won the ALDS over the Minnesota Twins, lost the ALCS to the Texas Rangers. The Rangers had never won a Pennant before, and, basically, Joe Girardi gave them this series by pitching lefthanded reliever Boone Logan against lefthanded steroid-aided slugged Josh Hamilton, and it didn't work.

43. 2012. Won the AL East, won the ALDS over the Baltimore Orioles, lost the ALCS to the Detroit Tigers in 4 straight. With Derek Jeter breaking his ankle in Game 1, and Mariano Rivera already lost for the season to a torn ACL, losing the ALCS was a formality. Rain delaying the inevitable Game 4 defeat didn't help. Still, I'd rather lose to a team from Detroit than a team from Dallas.

42. 2017. Reached the AL Wild Card Game, won it over the Oakland Athletics, won the ALDS over the Cleveland Indians, lost the ALCS to the Houston Astros. The home team won every game, so with the Yankees having a 3-2 lead, they ended up losing Games 6 and 7 in Houston. This was infuriating: Had Brian Cashman traded for Justin Verlander, he would have been available to the Yankees in that series, not the Astros. It made all the difference.

41. 2019. Won the AL East, won the ALDS over the Minnesota Twins, lost the ALCS to the Houston Astros. This would have hurt a lot more losing in 6 than in 7, like in 2017. But once we lost Game 2 when we had a chance to go 2-0 up before leaving Houston, I had no confidence. This was supposed to be the year Cashman's grand plan reached its conclusion, with Title 28. It didn't. We're still waiting.

40. 1981. Won the AL East in the 1st half, won the Strike-forced ALDS over the Milwaukee Brewers, won the ALCS over the Oakland Athletics, lost the World Series to the Los Angeles Dodgers in 6 games.

We were up 2 games to 0, then dropped the next 4. Reggie Jackson missed Games 3 and 4 with an injury, and told manager Bob Lemon he was ready for Game 5, but was held out of the lineup -- possibly on George Steinbrenner's order. Then he went 0-for-5 in Game 6 to prove Lemon's (Steinbrenner's?) point, and that was his last game in Pinstripes. Losing was bad enough, but losing to the L.A. O'Malleys? This one still sticks in my craw.

39. 1963. Won the Pennant, lost the World Series to the Los Angeles Dodgers. The Yankees won 104 games, their highest total between 1939 and 1998, but got swept in 4 straight. That Dodger team was the 1st ever to win the World Series without a single hitter reaching the Hall of Fame, but Sandy Koufax (winner of Games 1 and 4) and Don Drysdale (winner of Game 3) did, and that was enough.

38. 1926. Won the Pennant, lost the World Series to the St. Louis Cardinals. This was the 1st Pennant won by the team that became known as Murderers' Row: Although Babe Ruth, Waite Hoyt and Herb Pennock were holdovers from the 1921-23 Pennant run, new to such glory were Lou Gehrig, Tony Lazzeri and Earle Combs. No way were the Cards the better team. But Grover Cleveland Alexander won Game 6 and saved Game 7 for them. The Yankees returned the favor by sweeping the Cards in 1928.

Book about this season: The Cardinals and the Yankees, 1926: A Classic Season and St. Louis in Seven, by Paul E. Doutrich, published 2011.

37. 2003. Won the AL East, won the ALDS over the Minnesota Twins, won the ALCS over the Boston Red Sox, lost the World Series to the team then known as the Florida Marlins. After the Aaron Boone Game, we thought this was another Yankee team of destiny. But it wasn't. I could have lived with losing the Series to the Cubs. But the Marlins? Thanks for nothing, Jeff Weaver!

36. 1960. Won the Pennant, lost the World Series to the Pittsburgh Pirates. To say that the Pirates were deserving Champions is fair. To say they were the better team is not. The Yankees won their wins 16-3, 12-0 and 10-0; the Pirates won theirs 6-4, 3-2, 5-2 and 10-9, the Bill Mazeroski Game.

Mickey Mantle said not only that, out of the 12 World Series in which he played, including those the Yankees lost, this was the only one in which he thought the better team didn't win, but that he cried the entire flight home.

Book about this season: Bottom of the Ninth: Branch Rickey, Casey Stengel, and the Daring Scheme to Save Baseball from Itself, by Michael Shapiro, published in 2010. It's mainly about baseball's greatest bluff, the Continental League, but it also details Stengel's last season as Yankee manager, including the World Series, and its aftermath, when he "resigned," and then general manager George Weiss saw the writing on the wall and resigned.

35. 1922. Won the Pennant, lost the World Series to the New York Giants. After having lost to them the year before, it should have gotten better. But, this time, they got swept, not counting Game 2 which got called due to darkness (no lights in those days) after 10 innings.

34. 1942. Won the Pennant, lost the World Series to the St. Louis Cardinals. The Yankees won Game 1 in St. Louis, then lost the next 4, all by 3 runs or less.

33. 1957. Won the Pennant, lost the World Series to the Milwaukee Braves. Because of Milwaukee's newness as a major league city (they'd been minor-league as recently as 1952), and their fans' over-exuberance, the New York newspapers called the city "Bushville." (The minor leagues had been known as "bush leagues," and lame behavior in baseball has long been called "bush.")

It was unfair: By this point, Warren Spahn was already a legend, Eddie Mathews a slugging superstar, and Hank Aaron, then just 23, a batting champion. (At that point, he seemed more likely to match Ted Williams with a .400 batting average for a season than Babe Ruth with 714 home runs in a career.) The Yankees should have taken the Braves more seriously. They didn't, and paid the price, losing a 5-0 Game 7 at Yankee Stadium.

32. 1964. Won the Pennant, lost the World Series to the St. Louis Cardinals. The toughest Yankee Pennant race between 1948 and 1978, and, unlike most World Series the Yankees had played to that point, they never felt like clear favorites, not even when they went up 2 games to 1.

Book about this season: October 1964, by David Halberstam, published in 1995. He had previously written Summer of '49, about the beginning of the longest Yankee Dynasty, and this was the other bookend. It also details the Cardinals, and the changes going on in baseball and in America at large.

31. 2001. Won the AL East, won the ALDS over the Oakland Athletics, won the ALCS over the Seattle Mariners, lost the World Series to the Arizona Diamondbacks. After everything that happened from the morning of September 11 onward, this team brought the New York Tri-State Area so much joy and relief.

But when it came (figuratively -- certainly, not literally) crashing down on the night of November 4, I had nothing left to feel. I was disappointed, but not heartbroken. When I later found out about all the steroid use by Arizona, I got angry. It bothers me a lot more now than it did then.

Given the context of September 11 to November 4, 2001, had the Yankees finished the job, as they came within 2 outs of doing, not only would Alfonso Soriano, whose 8th inning home run gave the Yankees a 2-1 lead in Game 7, been a tremendous hero, and possibly made the difference in getting him to the Hall of Fame, but this season might well rank not just in the top 28 (being 1 of 28 Yankee World Series wins), but it would almost certainly be thought of, in hindsight, as Number 1.

Book about this season: The Last Night of the Yankee Dynasty: The Game, the Team, and the Cost of Greatness, by Buster Olney, published in 2008.

30. 1921. Won the Pennant, lost the World Series to the New York Giants. The Yankees' 1st Pennant and 1st trip to the World Series, the loss might have hurt at the time, especially since it was to the established team in New York City.

But it could have been mitigated by the sense that this young, powerful Yankee team (led by a record 59 home runs by Babe Ruth) would be back. There was no guarantee of that, of course. But nobody could have imagined that this would begin a run of 29 Pennants in 44 years.

Book about this season: 1921: The Yankees, the Giants, and the Battle for Baseball Supremacy in New York, by Lyle Spatz and Steve Steinberg, published in 2010. Although the battle was hardly over, as the World Series of 1922, '23, '36 and '37 would prove. And that was just Yankees vs. Giants.

29. 1955. Won the Pennant, lost the World Series to the Brooklyn Dodgers. Even the most hardcore of Yankee Fans couldn't have begrudged Dem Bums finally doing it.

28. 1976. Won the AL East, won the ALCS over the Kansas City Royals, lost the World Series to the Cincinnati Reds. The ALCS was emotionally exhausting, and I don't think too many fans expected the Yankees to defeat the defending champions, the Big Red Machine. This loss was disappointing, but hardly discouraging. Given the 12-year wait just to get back into the World Series, and the nature of the opponents, it may have been the most tolerable Yankee October loss ever.

Book about this season, and the dark age that came before it: Dog Days: The New York Yankees' Fall From Grace and Return to Glory, 1964-1976, by Philip Bashe. A Yankee Fan, Bashe has mostly written about the entertainment industry, including biographies of actor and cartoon voice man Mel Blanc and early rock star Ricky Nelson, and a history of heavy metal music.

Part IV will conclude the story.

Ranking the Yankees' Seasons: Part IV, #'s 27 to 1

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27. 1937. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the New York Giants. If it is possible for the Yankees to have a "least meaningful World Series-winning season," this could be it. The previous year's win over the Giants was tougher and more meaningful. (More on that later.) This whole season seemed to be a bit too easy.

26. 1950. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the Philadelphia Phillies. The Pennant race wasn't very interesting, and the Series, although close in the 1st 3 games, wasn't especially interesting, either. Nor were the Phillies a team with whom they had any history.

25. 1999. Won the AL East, won the ALDS over the Texas Rangers, won the ALCS over the Boston Red Sox, won the World Series over the Atlanta Braves. Beating the Red Sox was great. Taking the "Team of the Decade" title away from the Braves was nice. Cementing the "Team of the Century" title had already been done, probably with the 1977 and '78 titles. Confirming the 1995 Star Trek: Deep Space Nine prediction that the '99 Yankees would be in the conversation for the title of "greatest team ever" was fun.

But, after the epic story of 1996 and the domination of 1998, this one was kind of anti-climactic. Aside from the ALCS battle with the Red Sox, this season wasn't even all that interesting, and it certainly wasn't as important as 1996 (getting back to the top) or 2000 (beating the Mets).

24. 1938. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the Chicago Cubs. No real race for the Pennant, and a 4-game sweep. Unlike the one with the Cubs 6 years earlier, this one didn't even have an interesting subplot. (More on that later.) It was Lou Gehrig's last title, and Game 2 involved a pitching performance by Dizzy Dean that amounted to a "last stand" for the former Cardinal star, but the most notable thing about this Series is that it was the 1st time any team had won 3 straight.

23. 1932. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the Chicago Cubs. Winning 107 games and ending the Philadelphia Athletics' 3-year Pennant run was kind of a foregone conclusion. So was beating the Cubs, if not sweeping them.

The drama over how the Cubs treated former Yankee Mark Koenig, which sparked the Yankees' hitting onslaught, including Babe Ruth's "called shot" in Game 3, was the only real story for this one. Though it should be noted that this was the 1st Pennant the Yankees had won without Miller Huggins as manager. (Joe McCarthy took charge in 1931.)

Book about this season: The 1932 New York Yankees: The Story of a Legendary Team, a Remarkable Season, and a Wild World Series, by Ronald A. Mayer, published in 1928.

22. 1928. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the St. Louis Cardinals. A tough Pennant race with the rising A's was followed by a bit of an anti-climax. Sure, it was good to get revenge over the Cards for '26, and it was good to see Ruth hit 3 home runs in St. Louis in Game 4, as he had in '26, only this time it was the clincher. Ruth batted .625, while Gehrig had an on-base percentage of .706 and a slugging percentage of 1.727, and all remain Series records 91 years later.

If the 1927 Yankees were "Murderers' Row" and "the greatest team ever," the 1928 Yankees put the exclamation point on it, and turned the team into "the Dynasty" and "the lordly Yankees," 2 phrases that would be used often through 1964.

Book about this team: The 1928 New York Yankees: The Return of Murderers' Row, by Charlie Gentile, published in 2014.

21. 1962. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the San Francisco Giants. The Yankees have played the Giants in 7 World Series, but only this one since the Jints caught the last train for the Coast in 1957. There have been close calls (both teams making the Playoffs) in 1997, 2000, 2002, 2003, 2010 and 2012. But, with the exception of Willie Mays, there were few connections to the Polo Grounds years, so this one didn't mean as much.

20. 1939. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the Cincinnati Reds. Losing Gehrig early in the season didn't seem to stop the Yankees. Indeed, it seemed to motivate them: They had never before won a Pennant with neither Ruth nor Gehrig, and they seemed to want to make a statement. They did, becoming the 1st team ever to win 4 straight World Series. To this day, no other franchise has even done 3, except the 1972-74 A's.

Bill Dickey, Gehrig's best friend on the team, became the unofficial Captain. DiMaggio won his 1st batting title (.381) and his 1st MVP, while Charlie Keller batted .334. Between them, DiMaggio, Dickey, Joe Gordon and George Selkirk drove in 443 runs. The Reds were a good team, winning the Series over Detroit the next year, but, this time, the Yankees swept them. (This would be reversed in 1976-77, with the Yankees getting swept by the Reds before beating someone else the next year.)

Book about this season:  A Legend in the Making: The New York Yankees in 1939, by Richard J. Tofel, published in 2003. So much has been made of the Yankee titlists of 1927, 1941, 1961, 1977-78 and 1996-2000, that the 1936-39 Dynasty kind of gets lost in the historical shuffle. With this book, Tofel wanted to make the point that the 1939 team, the one in which DiMaggio took over the team headlines and (to use the phrase of Nuke LaLoosh in Bull Durham) announced his presence with authority, was the real beginning of "the lordly Yankees."

19. 1947. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the Brooklyn Dodgers. This was the last gasp of the Dodgers that won the National League Pennant in 1941, and nearly won them in '42 and '46. It was the rookie season of Jackie Robinson, Duke Snider and Ralph Branca -- the last survivor of this team, he won 21 games at age 21, so he should be remembered for more than 1 pitch he threw to Bobby Thomson 4 years later -- but it was still the team of Pete Reiser, Dixie Walker, Cookie Lavagetto and Joe Hatten. The other "Boys of Summer" were yet to come.

Likewise, this was the 1st of the 2 seasons that Bucky Harris managed the Yankees, but it was still Joe McCarthy's team, the team that had won in 7 Pennants in 8 years from 1936 to 1943. Harris would manage them to a close 3rd place in '48, and was fired. Casey Stengel was hired, and, while Yogi Berra, Vic Raschi and Allie Reynolds were already there in '47, '49 was when McCarthy's Yankees began to get phased out: DiMaggio, Keller, Tommy Henrich, Spud Chandler. (The McCarthy guys, including Phil Rizzuto, who hung on until 1956, never liked Stengel much.)

The Series was dramatic, and DiMaggio would call it "the most exciting ever." It was heightened by Robinson's presence and the dramatic moments of Lavagetto breaking up Bill Bevens' no-hitter on the last play in Game 4 and Al Giofriddo's catch robbing DiMaggio in Game 6. But the season was not: There was no Division Series or LCS in those days, and a 19-game winning streak, then tied with the 1906 White Sox for the longest in AL history (until the 2002 A's won 20 straight), removed all suspense from the AL race.

Book about this season: Electric October: Seven World Series Games, Six Lives, Five Minutes of Fame That Lasted Forever, by Kevin Cook, 2007. The title refers to the fact that this was the 1st World Series to be broadcast on television, by NBC. The 6 lives were those of the opposing managers, the Yankees' Harris and the Dodgers' Burt Shotton; pitching almost-hero Bevens; hitting hero Lavagetto; fielding hero Gionfriddo; and Yankee 2nd baseman George "Snuffy" Stirnweiss, who had won the AL batting title in 1945, but heard criticism that he had become a baseball hero only because of World War II's manpower drain, and proved otherwise.

18. 1943. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the St. Louis Cardinals. With World War II on, and the outcome by no means certain, this title isn't particularly cherished. But it was revenge for the preceding season.

17. 1951. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the New York Giants. After the Bobby Thomson Game, even winning would have been anticlimactic for the Jints. And they had their chances, going up 2-1. But Game 4 featured DiMaggio's last home run and strong pitching by Reynolds, and Game 5 featured a grand slam by Gil McDougald and brilliant pitching by Eddie Lopat. Game 6 was tough, but the Yankees finished it off, and DiMaggio retired.

16. 1952. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the Brooklyn Dodgers. The 1st title without DiMaggio, with Rizzuto and Berra the veteran presences (although Yogi was only 27) and Mantle the 20-year-old budding star. This season had a tough Pennant race with Cleveland, and possibly the best World Series ever, with the Yankees needing to win Games 6 and 7 at Ebbets Field to take the title, and they did.

15. 1958. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the Milwaukee Braves. Bob Turley became the 1st Yankee to win the Cy Young Award, and the Yanks came from 3 games to 1 down (it had only been done once before) to gain revenge over the Braves for 1957.

14. 1978. Won the AL East, won the ALCS over the Kansas City Royals, won the World Series over the Los Angeles Dodgers. Although this title didn't mean as much to the New York Tri-State Area as the previous year's did, it is, in many ways, the quintessential Yankee story.

Once again, there were intrasquad feuds. There was an injury crisis that put the Yankees 14 games behind Boston on July 20. And manager Billy Martin finally pushed his luck too far, resulting in his resignation one step ahead of George Steinbrenner's law. His replacement, Bob Lemon, calmed everybody down, and they surged, with the "Boston Massacre" series at Fenway Park in early September bringing them from 4 games back to a tie with the Red Sox.

It wasn't over, of course. The teams ended up tied, and home runs by Bucky Dent and Reggie Jackson gave the Yankees victory in the Playoff. They once again beat the Royals and the Dodgers, although they needed to come from 2-0 down to win the World Series.

Book about this season: October Men: Reggie Jackson, George Steinbrenner, Billy Martin, and the Yankees' Miraculous Finish in 1978. Roger Kahn, former New York Herald Tribune baseball writer and author of the Brooklyn Dodger memoir The Boys of Summer, published this book in 2003, on the 25th Anniversary.

13. 1956. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the Brooklyn Dodgers. Mickey Mantle batted .353, hit 52 home runs, and had 130 runs batted in. Not only did he join Lou Gehrig as the only Yankees ever to win the Triple Crown, but he remains the last player to have led both Leagues in all 3 categories.

Then came the World Series, and the perfect game by Don Larsen in Game 5, followed by the 9-0 barrage over the Dodgers at Ebbets Field, including a shutout by Johnny Kucks. It was revenge for 1955, and the last Subway Series except for 2000. The season's association with Mantle's Triple Crown and Larsen producing the greatest single-game pitching performance ever is what makes this Yankee season iconic.

Book about this season: My Favorite Summer 1956, by Mickey Mantle as told to Phil Pepe. I realize that the Mick was frequently what they call an unreliable narrator, and this was published in 1991, before he quit drinking. Between quitting and it having fully caught up with him, in 1994, Mickey published one last memoir, about his 12 Pennant-winning seasons, All My Octobers. Larsen wrote a memoir as well: The Perfect Yankee: The Incredible Story of the Greatest Miracle in Baseball History, published in 1996.

12. 1949. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the Brooklyn Dodgers. One of the most-discussed Yankee Pennant races, taking Boston down to the wire, including Joe DiMaggio being out until late June, then coming back with a vengeance. The Series was a little anticlimactic, but it was still a Subway Series.

Book about this season: Summer of '49, by David Halberstam, 1989. Most of the Yankees and Red Sox from this season were still alive, and Halberstam was able to interview most of them, but he didn't get to talk to Joe, only to his brother, Boston center field Dom DiMaggio, who would have been the greatest athlete in almost any other family.

11. 1941. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the Brooklyn Dodgers. On May 15, the Yankees were a game under .500, in 4th place, 6 1/2 games out of 1st. On July 16, the Yankees were 28 games over .500, in 1st place by 6 games. In between, they played 56 games, winning 41, and DiMaggio had gotten a hit in all 56. The Yankees clinched on September 3, the earliest Pennant-clinching in AL history.

The Dodgers clinched their Pennant on September 25, and both the players and their fans were chirping about how they were going to beat the Yankees and take over New York. Sound familiar? The Yankees ended up beating them in 5 games, clinching on their field. Yeah, that sounds like 2000 as well.

Books about this season, and about DiMaggio's streak in general, a common. But Baseball and Other Matters in 1941, Robert Creamer's 2000 book (originally titled Baseball in '41), remains the definitive tale of the '41 Yanks, the streak, Ted Williams' .406 season, the Dodgers winning their 1st Pennant in 21 years, and the way baseball helped people get through the last year of the Great Depression, the last year without having to think about America being at war..

10. 1936. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the New York Giants. The Yankees had won only 1 Pennant in 8 years, but ran away with this Pennant. (To be fair, the main reason the Detroit Tigers, winners of the 2 previous Pennants, finished 19 1/2 games back is that Hank Greenberg suffered an early injury.)

There were 5 regulars with at least 107 RBIs, including Lou Gehrig topping out at 152, plus 49 home runs. There were 6 regulars batting at least .300, led by Bill Dickey at .362 and Gehrig at .354. And there was one of the greatest rookie seasons ever, by Joe DiMaggi: .323, 29 homers and 125 RBIs, despite missing April with an injury.

It was the fact that they beat the Giants that really shook things up: The Jints had won the Series in 1933. But this was the Yankees' 5th, tying them with the Giants, Red Sox and A's for the most all-time. They have never trailed again, as this was the start of 4 straight titles. What's more, it made the Yankees, definitively, New York's greatest baseball team, something they would remain, depending on how you define that, either until this day or until 1969 when the Mets won their 1st title.

Book about the dynasty that this season started: Yankees 1936-39, Baseball's Greatest Dynasty: Lou Gehrig, Joe DiMaggio and the Birth of a New Era, by Stanley Cohen, published in 2018.

9. 2009. Won the AL East, won the ALDS over the Minnesota Twins, won the ALCS over the Los Angeles Angels, won the World Series over the Philadelphia Phillies. This was the official handoff of control from the dying George Steinbrenner to his son Hal. This was the opening of George's dream, the new Yankee Stadium. And this was the Year of the Walkoffs -- making it also, thanks to new pitching acquisition A.J. Burnett, the Year of Pie.

It was the Yankee debut of Burnett, pitcher CC Sabathia, 1st baseman Mark Teixeira and right fielder Nick Swisher. It was a year of (temporary) redemption for Alex Rodriguez. And it was the year Derek Jeter became the 1st Yankee ever to be named Sports Illustrated magazine's Sportsperson of the Year.

Winning the Division by sweeping the Red Sox, especially after failing to win it the preceding 2 years and the Sox' tainted 2004 and 2007 titles, was nice. Beating the Angels in the Playoffs, after the other way around happened in 2002 and 2005, was good. Defeating the Phillies, the defending World Champions, was impressive. The fact that we won Games 2 and 6 by defeating former Sox nemesis Pedro Martinez made it sweeter. And what a clinching game, and what a Yankee farewell, for Hideki Matsui in Game 6.

It was the Yankees' 40th Pennant and 27th World Championship. In each case, it remains their most recent. It was the 5th World Series win for Jeter, Mariano Rivera and Andy Pettitte, and the 4th (he was barely there for the 1996 title) for Jorge Posada -- "The Core Four."

Book about this season: Mission 27: A New Boss, A New Ballpark, and One Last Ring for the Yankees' Core Four, by longtime Yankee beat writers Mark Feinsand of the MLB Network and Bryan Hoch of MLB.com, with a foreword by Swisher, published this year on the 10th Anniversary.

8. 1927. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the Pittsburgh Pirates. The Yankees' 1st 4 Pennants (1921, '22, '23 and '26) were all close races. This was their 1st runaway win, featuring 110 regular-season wins, a total that has only been topped 4 times in MLB history. This was the team that became known as Murderers' Row and "The Greatest Team of All Time." That title is now disputed by many, but it set the standard for Yankee teams until 1961 -- 1998 at the latest.

Legend has it that Ruth, Gehrig and company put on such at show in batting practice before Game 1 at Forbes Field in Pittsburgh that the Pirates were completely intimidated and folded. But the players who lived long enough to be interviewed later by nostalgia merchants such as Lawrence Ritter denied that. The fact somewhat back that up, as both Game 1 and Game 4 were 1-run games, and none of the games was truly beyond doubt after 6 innings. Nevertheless, the Yankees did sweep the Series.

The most recent book about this team: Five O'Clock Lightning: Babe Ruth, Lou Gehrig and the Greatest Baseball Team in History, The 1927 New York Yankees, by Harvey Frommer. The great travel writer was a big Yankee Fan, and published this book in 2007. The title refers to the fact that Yankee home games in those days started at 3:00, so a late winning hit would come at around 5:00.

7. 1953. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the Brooklyn Dodgers. Aside from Mickey Mantle "inventing""the tape-measure home run" with tremendous blasts in Washington, Philadelphia and St. Louis, all in the 1st 2 weeks of the season, this season wasn't especially memorable. There wasn't really a Pennant race, as the Yankees finished 8 1/2 games ahead of the Cleveland Indians.

But it was the capper of the only time in history a team won 5 straight World Series. Afterward, owners Dan Topping and Del Webb gave the players World Series rings with a 5 in them, and a single diamond inside the curve of the 5. Whitey Ford, who came back that season after 2 years in the U.S. Army for the Korean War, says it's his favorite World Series ring.

Book about the dynasty that this season concluded: The October Twelve: Five Years of Yankee Glory 1949-1953, by Phil Rizzuto. In this book, published in 1994, the year he was finally, rightfully, elected to the Baseball Hall of Fame, the Scooter focused on 12 players who were on all 5 teams, including himself, Yogi Berra, and the starting pitching triad of Allie Reynolds, Eddie Lopat and Vic Raschi -- but not DiMaggio, who retired after 1951, and not Mantle, who arrived in '51. They're both in the book, to be sure, but not part of the focus.

6. 2000. Won the AL East, won the ALDS over the Oakland Athletics, won the ALCS over the Seattle Mariners, won the World Series over the New York Mets. At first, this didn't look like a special season. And when they lost 15 of 18 to close the regular season, nearly blowing the Division title in the process, it looked bad. They couldn't even really celebrate the clincher, since it came during a rain delay in a loss in Baltimore, when Tampa Bay lost.

But they got off the deck in time to squeeze out a tough 5-game win over the A's, then avenged the '95 ALDS loss by beating the M's in 6. Then came the 1st Subway Series since 1956. All 5 games were close, but the Yankees beat the Mets, and clinched at Shea Stadium. That made it special.

As Yankee Fan Paul Louis put it, the win meant that "The Yankees have scoreboard over the Mets for all time." He was right, especially when you consider the alternative: Given that there are a lot more Met fans we have to face, face-to-face, every day than Red Sox fans, losing the 2000 World Series would have been 10 times worse than what actually happened in 2004.

Book about this season: Next year, on April 7, 2020, in commemoration of the 20th Anniversary, a book by Jerry Beach will be published: The Subway Series: Baseball's Big Apple Battles And The Yankees-Mets 2000 World Series Classic. It will also look at earlier matchups between the Yankees, Mets, Giants and Dodgers, including regular-season Interleague games, regular-season intraleague Dodger-Giant games, the Dodgers' and Giants' 1960s returns to face the Mets, and the Spring Training and Mayor's Trophy Games between the Yankees and the Mets.

5. 1961. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the Cincinnati Reds. Why '61 over '27? It's not because the M&M Boys hit 115 home runs between them -- Mickey Mantle with 54 and Roger Maris with a new record of 61, breaking the 2-teammates record of 107 set in '27 by Ruth and Gehrig, and still standing.

It wasn't because of the pitching, although it's close, with Whitey Ford and Ralph Terry going 41-7 between them, and Luis Arroyo going 15-5 with what was then a record 29 saves. It wasn't even the defense: Not only were Mantle and Maris both very good fielders, but the "Wall-to-Wall Infield" of Moose Skowron, Bobby Richardson, Tony Kubek and Clete Boyer was probably the best-fielding infield the American League had yet seen. (Fans of the 1970s Baltimore Orioles would come to dispute that.)

The '27 Yankees were weakest at, ironically, the most important position: Catcher. In contrast, the '61 Yankees had Yogi Berra and Elston Howard trading off between catcher and left field, and Johnny Blanchard as a 3rd string catcher and 5th outfielder. Between them, they had 64 home runs and 192 RBIs.

The '27 Yankees won 110 games and outpaced the A's, a team on the rise but not yet there, by 19 games, as they won 91. The '61 Tigers won 101 games, and the Yankees won 109 to top them by 8, so they faced tougher competition. (The Orioles finished 3rd with 95 wins. Nobody outside Maryland remembers that.) The Yankees didn't sweep the Reds, but won the last 2 games (in Cincinnati, mind you) by a combined 20-5. The '27 Pirates won 94, the '61 Reds 93, so the level of competition there was about the same.

Book about this season: Sixty-One: The Team, the Record, the Men, by Kubek, with help from Cleveland sports columnist Terry Pluto. This was published in 1986, on the 25th Anniversary, so most of the players involved were still alive, except for, with some irony, Maris himself. (Howard had also died.)

In 2011, the 50th Anniversary, Phil Pepe published 1961*: The Inside Story of the Maris-Mantle Home Run Chase. By this point, most of the major players on the Yankees were dead (and Pepe himself has since died), but Pepe was able to add the context of the players who surpassed 61 home runs in a season (Mark McGwire, Sammy Sosa and Barry Bonds), and the conditions under which they did (including their cheating and how they, as compared to Maris, were treated by the media).

4. 1977. Won the AL East, won the ALCS over the Kansas City Royals, won the World Series over the Los Angeles Dodgers. The Yankees were close to the AL East lead all season long, but Boston and Baltimore wouldn't give in. And everybody seemed to be arguing with somebody, especially manager Billy Martin and newly-acquired slugger Reggie Jackson with each other. Billy would bat Reggie 3rd in the lineup, 5th or 6th, but never 4th, in the traditional "cleanup" spot.

Then, on August 10, owner George Steinbrenner gave Billy an ultimatum: "Billy, Bat Reggie 4th, or you're fired." Billy did so, and the Yankees ended up winning the Division by 2 1/2 games. They came from 1-0 and 2-1 deficits to Kansas City to win in 5, and capped the season with Reggie's 3-homer performance in Game 6 of the World Series.

This was the team's 1st title in 15 years, and came at a time when the City really needed it, following a 20-year period that began with the Dodgers and Giants being moved out of town, and included a crime wave that seemed like it would never stop, systemic municipal racism, and the City's near-bankruptcy in 1975.

Book about this season: Ladies and Gentlemen, the Bronx Is Burning: 1977, Baseball, Politics, and the Battle for the Soul of a City, by Jonathan Mahler. The book also looked at the City's cultural status of the time, and the year's nasty Mayoral race, which saw incumbent Mayor Abe Beame go down, and, ultimately, Congressman Ed Koch triumph over eventual Governor Mario Cuomo. It was published in 2006, and the following year saw it made into an 8-hour ESPN miniseries, The Bronx Is Burning.

3. 1923. Won the Pennant, won the World Series over the New York Giants. This was the 2nd time an American League team had won 3 straight Pennants, following the 1907-09 Detroit Tigers. (The Philadelphia Athletics won 4 in 5 years, 1910-14. The Boston Red Sox won 4 in 7 years, 1912-18.) But it was the 1st time the Yankees won the World Series, beating the intracity Giants, and it was the year the original Yankee Stadium opened.

Book about this season: The House that Ruth Built: A New Stadium, the First Yankees Championship, and the Redemption of 1923, by Robert Weintraub, published in 2011. Both the team in general and Ruth in particular needed redemption after the '21 Series and the '22 season in general.

2. 1996. Won the AL East, won the ALDS over the Texas Rangers, won the ALCS over the Baltimore Orioles, won the World Series over the Atlanta Braves. The Yankees went into this season not having won the Division or the Pennant in 15 years, and not having won the World Series in 18 years. It was also the 1st season in 15 years without Don Mattingly in uniform, and, following the previous season's Playoff collapse, few people expected the Yankees to make a serious run at a 23rd World Championship.

They fooled everybody. Derek Jeter, forced by injury to become the starting shortstop at age 21, became the AL Rookie of the Year. Bernie Williams matured into a star in center field, and Andy Pettitte did so on the mound. David Cone came back from what was feared to be a career- maybe even life-threatening shoulder condition, and was his old self again. Former Mets Darryl Strawberry and Dwight Gooden got their grooves back.

The bullpen pretty much made any game against the Yankees a 6-inning proposition: If you didn't have the lead in the 6th inning, you were not going to get one against the emerging Mariano Rivera in the 7th or the 8th, or against John Wetteland in the 9th.

Overseeing it all was Joe Torre, a Brooklyn native who had played 18 seasons in the major leagues, and managed 15, but had only reached the postseason once. Team owner George Steinbrenner, front office boss Gene Michael, and general manager Bob Watson showed faith in him, and he calmly guided the team to 92 wins, enough to win the Division.

They dropped Game 1 of the ALDS, but won the next 3. They won Game 1 of the ALCS in controversial fashion, then dropped Game 2, but took 3 straight in Baltimore to win the Pennant. Then they got embarrassed at home in Games 1 and 2 of the World Series, but took 3 straight in Atlanta and then the clincher at home.

Along the way, something amazing happened. The whole City seemed to unite behind them. Maybe it was the presence of former Mets Torre, Strawberry and Gooden. Maybe it was the lack of egos, the kind that the Yankees seemed to have in 1977 and '78. Maybe it was the appearance that the City had, thanks to President Bill Clinton's crime bill and Mayor Rudy Giuliani's crackdowns (the former made the latter viable), finally come out of a 30-year crime wave, and it was okay to feel good about New York again. But even people who would normally be Met fans seemed to stand with these Yankees. (That wouldn't last, of course.) But it made the '96 Yanks the most popular team in the franchise's history.

As broadcaster John Sterling -- whose closing call of "Ballgame over! Yankees win! Theeeeeeee Yankees win!" became familiar that season -- put it, "They're not a great team, but they're a team that plays great together. That would change in 1998.

Book about this season: Birth of a Dynasty: Behind the Pinstripes with the 1996 Yankees, by Joel Sherman and David Cone. Sherman covered them for the New York Post, and Cone gave the inside story.

1. 1998. Won the AL East, won the ALDS over the Texas Rangers, won the ALCS over the Cleveland Indians, won the World Series over the San Diego Padres. Losing the previous year's ALDS to the Indians stung, but not as much as it would have without the title the year before.

So the Yankees overcame a 1-4 start to go 114-48, setting a new AL record for wins in a season (though broken 3 years later). The season included a perfect game as part of an 18-4 season by David Wells, a 20-7 season by David Cone, the arrival of Orlando "El Duque" Hernandez, Mariano Rivera stamping himself as the greatest reliever in baseball, Bernie Williams winning the batting title at .339, the emergence of Jorge Posada, and a surprisingly good season from new 3rd base acquisition Scott Brosius.

The only real moment of doubt came when the Yankees fell 2-1 behind in the ALCS, but they didn't lose another game until the next April. The Rangers, the Indians and the Padres may have each had the most talented team in their respective franchises' histories, and the Yankees went 11-2 against them to take Title 24. The 1998 Yankees might not have been the greatest team in baseball history, but at 125-50 counting the postseason, they had the best season of any team in baseball history.

Book about this season: This Championship Season: The Incredible Story of the 1998 New York Yankees, by Howard Blatt. A "quickie book," published right after the season, and it reads like one: One reviewer said it seemed to be aimed at kids. But while other books have been written about the 1998 season -- including The Perfect Season: Why 1998 Was Baseball's Greatest Year, by catcher-turned-broadcaster Tim McCarver -- this seems to be the only one written about the Yankees in that season.

50 Rules for 50 Years

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Ziva David (Cote de Pablo): "Just to be clear: Are there any more of these 'Rules' I should be aware of?"
Leroy Jethro Gibbs (Mark Harmon): "About 50 of them."
Ziva: "Ha! And I don't suppose they're written down anywhere."
Gibbs: "Nope."
Ziva: "Then how am I supposed to -- "
Gibbs: "It's my job to teach them to you."
-- NCIS 

Gibbs Rule Number 7 is, "Always be specific when you lie." He broke his own Rule when he told Ziva that the Rules weren't written down and left it at that. He had them written down at his house.

I turn 50 next week. Here are 50 rules I've learned from my 1st 50 years:

1. Family always sticks together. Desertion is treason.
  
2. Never do anything only for the money. No matter how much it is. No matter how badly you need it. If you need the money that badly, you can find another reason to do it.

3. Anytime someone says, "It's not about (fill in the blank)," they're lying.

4. If you have to lie, make it a plausible lie. It shows you respect the person you're lying to, and thus raises less suspicion.

5. Courage is not the absence of fear, it's looking fear dead in the eye and saying, "To hell with you, I'm moving forward, and you won't stop me."

6. It's never too late to apologize. Corollary: It's never too late to forgive.

7. It's okay to rat someone out if it will save a life, but never if all that will be saved is money.

8. Always give the effort. People will forgive defeat if it looked like you cared enough to try to win. Corollary: If you can't win, at least make the winner feel as though his win wasn't worth the effort.

9. Better to trust a sincere fool than a smart liar.

10. If people think you're crazy or stupid, use it to your advantage before they can use it to theirs. (I like to call this the Dizzy Dean Rule.)

11. You don't need a third drink.

12. Admit it when you're wrong.

13. Coincidence is what the incurious believe in.

14. Never throw the first punch. Throw the next four. (From Billy Martin.)

15. There's no shame in a man admitting he's in over his head. (From Colonel Sherman T. Potter on M*A*S*H.)

16. Never apologize for having told the truth.

17. It's better to be called a coward by an asshole than to be revealed as an asshole by anyone. Corollary: Nothing is worth a triple-dog-dare. (A reference to A Christmas Story.)

18. Love is worth a concession, but no kind of sex is worth making yourself look undignified in public. (A variant of Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons: "No woman's worth crawling on the Earth, so walk like a man, my son.")

19. Never pick on a rookie when he's down.

20. If you can keep your head about you while all others are losing theirs, maybe they know something you need to know. (A variant of Rudyard Kipling: " ...while all others are losing theirs, and blaming you... yours is the world and all that's in it, and, what's more, you'll be a man, my son!")

21. Be the underestimated, never the underestimator.

22. If life hands you lemonade, drink it, before someone turns it back into lemons.

23. Never blame on malice what you can blame on incompetence. (This, and variations on it, are called "Hanlon's Razor," and have been attributed to Robert J. Hanlon, Robert A. Heinlein, Bernard Ingham, Napoleon Bonaparte and Johann Wolfgang von Goethe.)

24. If the music don't sound good, who cares what the picture looks like? (From Ray Charles, in a 1984 commercial for Pioneer laserdisc players.)

25. Sometimes, paranoia is justified.

26. Always look busy, so they won't know that you're fooling around. (A variant of George Costanza on Seinfeld: "If you look annoyed, people will assume that you're busy.")

27. You don't have to understand women. You only have to understand one woman.

28. Never remind a woman that you were right and she was wrong. Even if you were right, reminding her of that just makes you wrong-squared. Which is worse than doubly wrong.

29. Never talk on the phone in the bathroom. It's like you're pissing on the other person's shoes.

30. Never shut up, or the other side will be the only one heard.

31. Have a heart of gold, but never at the cost of a spine of steel.

32. Never let the desire for perfection interfere with your ability to do good. (Sometimes written as, "Never let the perfect be the enemy of the good." Originally, "The better is the enemy of the good," from Voltaire. Also known as "settling for half a loaf.")

33. It's not the crime that gets you, it's the cover-up. (Variations of this go back to Watergate.)

34. When a politician resigns his office, or announces he's not running for re-election, "to spend more time with my family," it's code for, "I did something wrong, and my wife found out about it, and I have to make it up to her."

35. Forgetting when to keep the truth to yourself can be as damaging as getting caught in a lie.

36. There will be times when neither you nor an ally is the best spokesman for your own opinion. Corollary: Not every person in your party is an ally, and not every person in the other party is an enemy. Another Corollary: Better to trust a principled member of the other party than an unprincipled member of your own. Counterpoint: Sometimes, a good message comes from a messenger you won't like.

37. If you're not in favor of government spending for universal health care, you are NOT "pro-life."

38. Never accept an apology from someone who's only sorry he got caught. 

39. Never go to bed with someone that you're not willing to have breakfast with in the morning.

40. Never draw your weapon, unless you're willing to use it. (This one can be traced back at least as far as Richard Boone playing Paladin on Have Gun -- Will Travel.)

41. When you walk into a room, look around, and see if you can see a sucker. If you can't, walk out of the room, because the sucker is you. (I think this one came from Nelson Algren.)

42. Anybody who says sports is war has never been in a war. (From Bob Feller.)

43. Sports may be a microcosm of life, but it's not life and death. Corollary: Your successes and failures are not tied in with your team's. (From Nick Hornby.)

44. Your season may have ended badly, but there's always another season. (Also from Hornby.)

45. Sports, or anything else you might be interested in, isn't something that anyone else can understand, unless they also belong. (Also from Hornby.)

46. If a child that is not your own believes in Santa Claus, let them. If the child is not yours, then explaining how St. Nicholas was turned into Santa Claus is not your call.

47. Logic is the beginning of wisdom, not the end. (From Leonard Nimoy.)

48. It's not important that you are the one who does something. What is important is that it is done. (From Reggie Jackson.)

Okay, there's more than 50 rules.

49. Anything worth doing is worth doing with a full heart. If you can't, don't do it.

50. If a little girl wants you to play with her, do it. She won't remember it when she's ten, but it's not just for her. It's for you.

The Cole Hard Fact: Hal Steinbrenner Wants to Win Now

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Gerrit Cole, 2001: He's one of our own!

Let the "Cole hard facts" be made to a candid world.

The Yankees have signed free agent pitcher Gerrit Cole, a genuine ace, who had helped the Houston Astros win 2 of the last 3 American League Pennants, beating the Yankees in the Playoffs both times.

The contract is for $324 million over 9 years, an average of $36 million per year. This will almost certainly blow the luxury tax threshold that general manager Brian Cashman has striven to stay under for years.

Gerrit Alan Cole was born on September 8, 1990 in the Los Angeles suburb of Newport Beach, California, and grew up there, which -- along with the L.A. area teams, the Dodgers and the Angels, having money to burn -- led some people to speculate that he would be more likely to sign with one of them than with the Yankees. Turns out, he was a Yankee Fan.

He pitched at UCLA, and debuted in the major leagues with the Pittsburgh Pirates in 2013, helping them reach the Playoffs. He stayed through 2017, and was traded to the Houston Astros, so he missed their 2017 World Championship. He went 15-5 in 2018, and 20-5 in 2019, helping the Astros win the AL Pennant, and finishing 2nd to teammate Justin Verlander for the AL Cy Young Award.

He became a free agent, 1 of 2 big ones available in the off-season. The other was from the team that beat the Astros in the World Series, the Washington Nationals: Stephen Strasburg. The Yankees had to get at least one of them, and when Strasburg re-signed with the Nats, that made it imperative that they sign Cole. They did.

This contract means that, like all true Yankee Fans, the team's operating owner, Hal Steinbrenner, has had enough, and is acting like his father, George Steinbrenner. "I'm opening the vault," he appears to have told Cashman. "Sign this guy and bring him in, or you're fired." Cashman has done it, offering Cole a contract, and he has accepted it.

The message could not be any clearer: 10 years without winning a pennant, much less the World Series -- and it will be 11 years by next October -- is absolutely unacceptable.

Coming close and not getting there is no longer good enough for Hal. His message is, "Brian, we tried it your way, and it didn't work. Now, we are going to try it my way, which was my father's way." Or, as the evil Chancellor would have put it in V for Vendetta, "We are being buried beneath the avalanche of your inadequacies, Mister Cashman!"

The 2020 season will be what, really, each of the last 5 years should have been: The he referendum on Cashman. Hal is telling him, "I am giving you everything you need to win the World Series this year, and if you don't win it, it's not going to be on me, it's going to be on you. You can no longer use cheapness as an excuse. You can no longer use the luxury tax as an excuse. It is time to win."

So, as things currently stand, the starting rotation, presuming they will all be healthy, will be -- not necessarily in this sequence, but in this order of perceived effectiveness -- Gerrit Cole, Masahiro Tanaka, Luis Severino, James Paxton, and an open slot.

The open slot could be filled by Domingo German, who was on his way to a Cy Young Award-worthy season before he was suspended due to a domestic violence accusation. That suspension, and injuries, meant the Yankees had to use the "opener" strategy in the postseason, and it may have cost them the Pennant.

Without a police report, the charge should be ignored by MLB completely. I suspect it would be if he played for the Boston Red Sox. But he's a Yankee, so, even without admissible evidence, we're probably looking at 30 games.

So the 5th starter will probably start out as Jordan Montgomery, back from a long-term injury. If your 5th starter is Jordan Montgomery, you're in decent shape.

But once German is available again, the rotation would be Cole, German, Tanaka, Severino and Paxton. If James Paxton is your 5th starter, you should be able to avoid a 5-game losing streak.

The news isn't all good. Cashman didn't lift a finger to re-sign Didi Gregorius, and he signed a 1-year deal with the Philadelphia Phillies. The team gave up on the oft-injured Greg Bird.

But with Cole, the Yankees have a real ace for the 1st time since CC Sabathia became injury-prone.

This is not a good time to be an Astros fan. They lose Cole, on top of the accusations of cheating. Already, now that the checking for cheating will be increased, people are predicting that the 2018 Astros could end up crashing. Like the 1998 Florida Marlins, or the 1977 Oakland Athletics. Or like the 1965 and 1982 Yankees.

We shall see. And we may like what we see.

*

Days until the U.S. national soccer team plays again: Unknown. No matches are currently scheduled. There won't be another CONCACAF Gold Cup until July 2, 2021. The USMNT will compete in the 2020 Olympics, which open on July 24. Surely, there will be tuneup matches before then.

Days until Arsenal play again: 1, tomorrow, at 12:55 PM New York time, in Europa League Group Stage action, away to Standard Liege of Belgium.

Days until my 50th Birthday, at which point I can join AARP and get discounts for travel and game tickets: 7, on Wednesday, December 18. One week.

Days until the premiere of the final Star Wars film, Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker: 9, on December 20, 2019.

Days until the New Jersey Devils next play a local rival: 22, on Thursday night, January 2, 2020, against the New York Islanders, at the Barclays Center in Brooklyn. The next game against the New York Rangers, a.k.a. The Scum, will be on Thursday, January 9, at Madison Square Garden. The next game against the Philadelphia Flyers, a.k.a. The Philth, will be on Thursday, February 6, at the Wells Fargo Center.

Days until the Baseball Hall of Fame vote is announced, electing Derek Jeter: 41on January 21. Under 6 weeks.

Days until the 1st Presidential voting of 2020, the Iowa Caucuses: 54, on Monday, February 3. Under 8 weeks. The New Hampshire Primary will be 8 days later.

Days until the New York Red Bulls play again: 81, on Sunday March 1, at 1:00 PM, home to FC Cincinnati. Under 12 weeks. Only the season's 1st 3 games have been released. I don't know when the full 2020 MLS schedule will be released.

Days until the Yankees' 2020 Opening Day: 106, on Thursday, March 26, away to the Baltimore Orioles. Under 4 months. And now, it feels as though we can look forward to it.

Days until the Red Bulls next play a "derby": At least 107. None of their 1st 3 games will be against one of their regional rivals: The Union, New York City FC, D.C. United and the New England Revolution.

Days until the Yankees' 2020 home opener: 113, on Thursday, April 2, against the Toronto Blue Jays.

Days until the next North London Derby: 136, on Saturday, April 25, Arsenal's 1st visit to the new Tottenham Stadium, adjacent to the site of the previous White Hart Lane. Under 5 months. It is currently scheduled to be on the 16th Anniversary of the 2nd time that Arsenal won the League at White Hart Lane -- but also the last time Arsenal won the League anywhere. Of course, for TV reasons, the game could be moved to another date, probably the next day.

Days until the next Yankees-Red Sox series begins: 149, on May 8, 2020, at Yankee Stadium II. Under 5 months. 

Days until Euro 2020 begins, a tournament being held all over Europe instead of in a single host nation: 184, on Friday, June 12, 2020. About 6 months.

Days until the next Summer Olympics begins in Tokyo, Japan: 226, on July 24, 2020. Under 8 months.

Days until Rutgers University plays football again: 269, on Saturday, September 5, at noon, home to Monmouth University, a Football Championship Subdivision School in West Long Branch, Monmouth County, New Jersey. In other words, if they don't win this game overwhelmingly, especially now that Greg Schiano is back as head coach, it will look very, very bad. Anyway, under 9 months.

Days until East Brunswick High School plays football again: Unknown, as the 2020 schedule has not been released yet. Most likely, the season opener will be against arch-rival Old Bridge, on Friday night, September 11, away at the purple shit pit on Route 9. That's 275 days.

Days until the next East Brunswick-Old Bridge football game: See the previous answer.

Days until the next Presidential election, when we can dump the Trump-Pence regime and elect a real Administration: 328on November 3, 2020. Under 11 months.

Days until the next Rutgers-Penn State football game: 353, on Saturday, November 28, at home. Under 1 year.

Days until a fully-Democratic-controlled Congress can convene, and the Republicans can do nothing about it: 389, on January 3, 2021. A little over a year, or a little under 13 months.

Days until Liberation Day: 406at noon on January 20, 2021. A little over a year, or under 14 months. Note that this is liberation from the Republican Party, not just from Donald Trump. Having Mike Pence as President wouldn't be better, just differently bad, mixing theocracy with plutocracy, rather than mixing kleptocracy with plutocracy.

Days until the next Winter Olympics begins in Beijing, China: 786, on February 4, 2022. A little over 2 years, or a little under 26 months.

Days until the next World Cup is scheduled to kick off in Qatar: 1,076, on November 21, 2022, in Qatar. Under 3 years, or a little over 35 months.

Days until the next Women's World Cup is scheduled to kick off: As yet unknown, but probably on the 2nd Friday in June 2023, which would be June 9. That would be 1,276 days, a little over 3 1/2 years, or under 42 months. A host nation is expected to be chosen on March 20, 2020. Since 2 of the last 3 host nations have been in Europe, North America (Canada) hosted in 2015, and Asia (China) hosted in 2007, my guess is that it will be in either Asia (Japan, possibly Korea, but not China) or Oceania (Australia, possibly a joint bid with New Zealand).

How to Be a Devils Fan In Columbus -- 2019-20 Edition

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Next Saturday, the New Jersey Devils will go to Ohio to play the Columbus Blue Jackets.

Before You Go. Columbus can get really hot in the Summer, but this game will be played right before Christmas, and, besides, it will be indoors. The Columbus Dispatch website is predicting the high 30s for Saturday afternoon, and the mid-20s for the evening.

Columbus is in the Eastern Time Zone, so you won't have to set your clocks back.

Tickets. The Blue Jackets averaged 16,658 fans per home game this season, only about 92 percent of capacity.

Which does beg the question: Why did Columbus get an NHL team? Why not Cleveland or Cincinnati, the more proven major league cities? Probably because somebody (probably the actual Devil, a.k.a. Commissioner Gary Bettman) though that neither Cleveland nor Cincinnati could support a team by itself, but a team in Columbus, in Central Ohio, would be supported by the entire State. (Or maybe that theory makes no sense, since he let the Minnesota North Stars move to Dallas, when he could have suggested Austin as a way to get fans from Dallas and Houston, but didn't.)

At any rate, you should be able to walk up to the box office 5 minutes before puck-drop, and buy any seat you can afford. In the Lower Level, the 100 sections, seats are $140 between the goals and $108 behind them. In the Upper Level, the 200 sections, seats are $74 between the goals and $53 behind them.

Getting There. It's 536 miles from Times Square in New York to Capitol Square in Columbus, and 526 miles from the Prudential Center to Nationwide Arena. Flying may seem like a good option, and United Airlines can get you a nonstop flight from Newark Liberty to Port Columbus International Airport for a round-trip fare of as little as $518.

Amtrak does not go to Columbus. Its main train station was demolished in 1979 to make way for the Columbus Convention Center (which is too bad, because it was just 2 blocks from the Arena), and it is now the largest metropolitan area in America that doesn't have Amtrak access.

Greyhound's run between New York and Columbus is about 14 hours with no change of buses necessary, costing $310, and dropping to as little as $144 with advanced-purchase. The station is at 111 E. Town Street, at 3rd Street, downtown, 2 blocks south of the State House.

If you decide to drive, it's far enough that it will help to get someone to go with you and split the duties, and to trade off driving and sleeping. You'll need to get on the New Jersey Turnpike. Take it to Exit 14, to Interstate 78. Follow I-78 west all the way through New Jersey, to Phillipsburg, and across the Delaware River into Easton, Pennsylvania. Continue west on I-78 until reaching Harrisburg. There, you will merge onto I-81. Take Exit 52 to U.S. Route 11, which will soon take you onto I-76. This is the Pennsylvania Turnpike, the nation's first superhighway, opening in 1940.

The Turnpike will eventually be a joint run between I-76 and Interstate 70. Once that happens, you'll stay on I-70, all the way past Pittsburgh, across the little northern pandhandle of West Virginia, and into Ohio all the way to Columbus.

If you do it right, you should spend about an hour and 15 minutes in New Jersey, 5 hours and 30 minutes in Pennsylvania, 15 minutes in West Virginia, and about 2 hours and 15 minutes in Ohio. That's about 9 hours and 15 minutes. Counting rest stops, preferably halfway through Pennsylvania and just after you enter Ohio, and accounting for traffic in both New York and Columbus, it should be no more than 11 hours, which would save you time on Greyhound, if not flying.

Once In the City. Founded in 1816, Columbus, named for Christopher Columbus, is easily the largest city in Ohio by population, with about 823,000 people, to a mere 397,000 for Cleveland and 298,000 for Cincinnati. But its metropolitan area has just 2.4 million people, still larger than Cincy's 2.2 million but considerably smaller than Cleveland's 3.5 million, because Cleveland has a much larger suburban area.

High Street is the street address divider between East and West, and Broad Street serving as the divider between North and South. The southeaster corner of High & Broad includes Capitol Square, with the State House. The sales tax in the State of Ohio is 5.75 percent, rising to 7.5 percent in Franklin County, including the City of Columbus.
The Ohio State House. No, I don't know why they stopped building it
before finishing the dome.

ZIP Codes in Columbus begin with the digits 432, and the Area Code is 614, with 380 overlaid. The Central Ohio Transit Authority (COTA) runs buses, with a $2.00 fare, but no rapid transit rail system: No subway, no elevated, no light rail, no commuter rail. Interstate 270 serves as a beltway, known as the Outerbelt or, for a local "sports" hero, the Jack Nicklaus Freeway.

The city government runs the electricity. The city is about 59 percent white, 28 percent black, 6 percent Hispanic and 4 percent Asian.

Going In. The Nationwide Arena (naming rights bought by the insurance company) is about a mile northwest of the State House, in the Arena District, near the confluence of the Scioto and Olentangy Rivers, in an area that includes their minor-league ballpark and their Convention Center.
Several bus lines get you there. The official address is 200 W. Nationwide Blvd. Parking is cheap, starting at $3.00. The rink is laid out east-to-west, and the Jackets attack twice toward the east end.

The Arena includes an in-house practice facility, the OhioHealth IceHaus. It was the 1st NHL arena to have this since the old Madison Square Garden, and inspired the building of the AmeriHealth Pavilion as part of the Devils' Prudential Center project.
The Arena has hosted NCAA Tournament basketball, "professional wrestling" and concerts. The husband & wife team of country singers Tim McGraw & Faith Hill played the Arena's 1st event, and British rock legends Paul McCartney and (the surviving members of) The Who have played there within the past year. President Barack Obama held one of his final 2012 campaign rallies, with Bruce Springsteen and Jay-Z performing.

ESPN The Magazine declared it "the No. 2 stadium experience in professional sports." The Ultimate Sports Road Trip rated it the best arena in the NHL, saying, "This newer arena in downtown Columbus is the anchor for the emerging Arena District, already burgeoning with shops, restaurants and hotels. The venue is spectacular, from its nostalgic brick and stone veneer to its sweeping concourses with blue mood lighting and modern amenities. The arena bowl has state of the art scoreboards and surround LED graphics boards which look 21st century high tech. With a separate practice rink built right in the facility, theme restaurants and great food selection, not to mention a raucous hockey atmosphere, this NHL venue is a must see!"

But despite its youth, the Arena already has a tragic history. On March 16, 2002, 13-year-old Brittanie Cecil was struck in the head by a deflected puck during the Blue Jackets' game against the Calgary Flames, dying from her injuries 2 days later. As far as can be determine, she is the only fan in the NHL's nearly 100-year history ever to be killed in a game-related accident. As a result of her death, the NHL mandated safety netting in all its arenas.

Food. Being in Big Ten Country, where tailgate parties are practically a sacrament, you would expect the Columbus arena to have lots of good options. They do not disappoint. Their chain stands include ColdStone Creamery behind Sections 108, 121, 202, 203 and 218; Tim Hortons at 210; Kettle Chipper potato chips at 105; Papa John's Pizza 102 and 226; and that Cincinnati specialty, Skyline chili -- chili over spaghetti -- at 105, 119 and 206.

There are stands for that Midwestern staple, Bratwurst, at 108, 121, 202, 203 and 209; a Sausage Haus at 121; a Baked Potato stand at 105; Burgers at 105, 119, 206 and 222; Hot Dogs at 108, 111, 119, 202, 203, 206, 209, 218 and 222; Chicken Tenders at 101, 119, 206 and 222; French Fries at 105, 119, 206 and 222; Cheese Fries at 229; Popcorn at 108, 121, 202, 203, 209 and 218; Milkshakes at 105; and Mexican food at 217.

Team History Displays. As 1 of the 3 newest teams in the NHL, the Jackets don't have much history. They have no retired numbers. They have just 1 banner honoring anyone, founding owner John H. McConnell. "Mr. Mac" was also the founder of Worthington Industries, a steel company. Kilbourn Street, on the Arena's west side, has been renamed John H. McConnell Blvd. in his memory. The team's parking deck, across the Boulevard from the Arena, is named the McConnell Garage. His son, John P. McConnell, now owns both the team and Worthington Industries.
They have just 1 player from their history who has been elected to the Hockey Hall of Fame, Sergei Fedorov, who played for them from 2005 to 2008, but is better known as a Detroit Red Wing. (I don't know why they haven't retired his number: It's not like 91 is a popular one.) They have never won their Division in 16 tries (not counting the current season and the never-played 2004-05). They've made the Playoffs only 3 times (in 2009, 2014 and 2017), and won a grand total of 3 Playoff games (2 in 2014 and 1 last year, all against Pittsburgh).

Dave King, the team's 1st head coach, has been elected to the International Ice Hockey Federation (IIHF) Hall of Fame, for his contributions to the Canadian national team. As yet, no member of the Jackets' organization has received the Lester Patrick Trophy for contributions to hockey in America.

Instead of banners detailing the team's history (which wouldn't take many banners), they have banners of the NHL's other 30 teams. Yes, even the teams that Jacket fans don't particularly like, such as Pittsburgh, Detroit and Chicago.

Because of the nature of Ohio sports, both Cleveland and Cincinnati, the Browns-Steelers and Reds-Pirates rivalries have given the Jackets a rivalry with the Pittsburgh Penguins; and the Ohio State-Michigan and Cavaliers-Pistons rivalries have given them one with the Detroit Red Wings. The Jackets trail the Pens 28-14, and they trail the Wings 55-37-1.

Stuff. The Blue Line Team Store is on the north side of the Arena. The usual items that can be found at a souvenir store can be found there, including Union-style Army hats with the team logo on them.

As 1 of the 2 newest teams in the NHL, starting play in 2000 along with the Minnesota Wild, there aren't any official NHL videos about the Jackets. Don't count on finding many books about them either: The only one I could find on Amazon.com was Erin Butler's entry for them in the NHL's official Inside the NHL series. Maybe if this strong season they're having turns out well.

During the Game. A November 19, 2014 article on The Hockey News' website ranked the NHL teams' fan bases, and listed the Blue Jackets' fans 28th, ahead of only Dallas and Arizona: "Jackets fans have decent reputation, but THN metrics suggest it's exaggerated." I'm not sure what that means.
Does it mean that they have an exaggerated reputation for decency?

No, their reputation for decency is fine: You do not have to worry about wearing Devils gear in Nationwide Arena. Their rivals are the Pittsburgh Penguins, the Detroit Red Wings, and the Chicago Blackhawks (because everybody in the Midwest seems to hate the Hawks, now that they've replaced the Wings as the Midwest's most successful hockey team). They won't bother New Jersey fans, as long as you don't bother them first.

So you may be asking yourself, "I know what a Yellow Jacket is, it's a nasty stinging insect. I know what a Green Jacket is, it's the jacket you get for winning the Masters golf tournament. But what's a Blue Jacket?" The team's name was inspired by Ohio's connection to the American Civil War: Not only were legendary Generals Ulysses S. Grant, William Tecumseh Sherman and Philip Sheridan from Ohio, but the State lost a greater percentage of its population in battle than any other (on the non-traitor side, anyway).

Next Saturday's Devils-Jackets game will not feature a promotion. Leo Welsh of Opera Columbus is the Jackets' National Anthem singer. When he's introduced, the fans shout out, "Leo!" The 1st time he sang it, in 2003, he pumped his left fist after finishing. He says he doesn't know why he did it. Afterward, the team said it got such a great reaction that he should do it every time. So he does.
The fans, who call themselves the 5th Line (hockey teams usually have 4 forward lines) like to do the "O-H-I-O" chant made famous at Ohio State football games (and copied by the R&B group the Ohio Players on their song "Fire"), and also chant the team's initials, "C-B-J!"

Prior to the start of the 2007-08 season, the team bought a hand-made replica of an 1857 Napoleon cannon. It is "fired" at home games when the Jackets take the ice, score, or win. Their goal song is "The Whip" by Locksley.

The mascot is Stinger the Yellow Jacket, although his costume was changed from yellow to green because it clashed less with the Blue Jackets' blue jerseys. He wears Number 00, in honor of the team's 2000 founding, and tends to bang on a snare drum.
That's right: They say that this clashes less.

After the Game. The Arena district is well-policed, and downtown should be safe. Columbus doesn't have nearly the reputation for crime that Cleveland and Cincinnati do.

As for where to go for a postgame meal or drink, an Italian restaurant called Beppa di Bucco is across from the Arena to the east, a Mexican restaurant named Nada to the west, and bd's Mongolian Grill to the south.

The most famous bar, perhaps in the entire State of Ohio, is the Varsity Club, across from the OSU Ice Arena and 3 blocks north of Ohio Stadium. 278 W. Lane Avenue, at Tuttle Park Place. High Street, the eastern boundary of the OSU campus, has been described as "a zoo" on home football Saturdays, although that won't affect you as a visiting hockey fan.

Unfortunately, the most storied Ohio State fan bar of all, Papa Joe's, home of the Saturday morning Kegs and Eggs breakfast, burned down in 1996. The current pizza chain of the same name has no connection, aside from being an Ohio tradition. Retail space, including the current Ohio State bookstore (a Barnes & Noble, of course), is on the site. 1556 N. High Street at 11th Avenue.

I can find no references to places where New Yorkers gather in or around Columbus: The sites that usually list bars for football fans in exile don't seem to have references to where Yankees, Mets, Giants or Jets fans go when they live nearby.

Remember the York Steak House? There was one at the Brunswick Square Mall in East Brunswick, New Jersey, and I grew up a mile down the hill from it. There is only one left, and it is in Columbus. 4220 W. Broad Street, a.k.a. U.S. Route 40, at the interchange of I-270, across from the Westland Mall, 6 miles west of downtown. Bus 10.

If you visit Columbus during the European soccer season, the Fado Irish Pub chain has an outlet here, at 4022 Townsfair Way, about 9 miles northeast of downtown. Number 16 bus.

Sidelights. Columbus may have only the 1 major league team, unless you count the Crew, but it's a decent sports town, and here's some of the highlights:

* Huntington Park. Just 2 blocks west of Nationwide Arena, at 330 Huntington Park Lane, this 10,100-seat stadium has been home to the International League's Columbus Clippers since 2009. Since moving in, they've won Pennants in 2010, 2011 and 2015, giving them a total of 10 Pennants.
* Cooper Stadium. Opened in 1932 as Red Bird Stadium, and renamed for Harold Cooper, the Franklin County Commissioner and team owner who kept professional baseball in the city in the 1950s, this stadium was one of the most successful ballparks in the minor leagues. It was also one of the largest, seating 17,500 people at its peak, and 15,000 in its last years.

Initially, it was home to the Columbus Red Birds, a farm team of the St. Louis Cardinals (also nicknamed the Redbirds), and to a Negro League team, the Columbus Blue Birds. The Red Birds won Pennants in 1933, 1934, 1937, 1941, 1942, 1943 and 1950.

The Cardinals moved them to Omaha in 1955, and a new team was brought in, the Columbus Jets, a farm club first of the Kansas City Athletics, then of the Pittsburgh Pirates. This led to the stadium being renamed Jets Stadium. They won the Pennant in 1961 and 1965, before being moved to Charleston, West Virginia after the 1970 season. The Pirates restored Columbus as their Triple-A team in 1977, the Yankees took over in 1979, the Washington Nationals in 2007, and the Cleveland Indians in 2009.
The Clippers were a Yankee farm team from 1979 to 2006, infamous as the bad end of "The Columbus Shuttle," George Steinbrenner's pipeline from Triple-A ball to the Yankees and back. As a Yankee farm team, they won IL Pennants in 1979, 1980, 1981, 1987, 1991, 1992 and 1996. All told, Columbus baseball teams have won 19 Pennants.

Cooper Stadium was closed after the 2008 season, but instead of being demolished, it has been converted into an auto racing facility. 1155 W. Mound Street, 3 miles west of downtown. Number 6 bus.

An April 24, 2014 article in The New York Times, showing baseball fandom by ZIP Code, shows that, despite being considerably closer to Cincinnati (107 miles) than to Cleveland (143 miles), the Indians still have a slight edge on baseball fandom in Columbus, on the average having 28 percent to the Reds' 22 percent. The September 2014 issue of The Atlantic Monthly had a similar map, showing that the Browns are more popular in Columbus than the Bengals.

Cincinnati is the nearest MLB and NFL city, while Cleveland is the nearest NBA city. If it had teams in those sports, Columbus would rank 29th in population in MLB, 26th in the NFL, and 25th in the NBA. So don't hold your breath.

* Ohio State. The most famous building in the State of Ohio is Ohio Stadium, or, as ABC Sports' legendary college football announcer Keith Jackson called it, The Big Horseshoe On the Olentangy -- home field of the school usually referred to as "THE... Ohio State University." How big is it? The official seating capacity is currently listed as 104,944, making it the 4th-largest non-racing stadium in the world. 411 Woody Hayes Drive (formerly Woodruff Avenue), 3 1/2 miles north of downtown. Number 18 bus.
The Value City Arena at the Schottenstein Center opened in 1998, at 555 Borror Drive, across the Olentangy River from the Stadium. It hosted the NCAA's hockey Final Four, a.k.a. the Frozen Four, in 2005. The Bill Davis Stadium (baseball) and the Jesse Owens Memorial Stadium (track & field) are part of this complex as well.
From 1956 to 1998, Ohio State played basketball at St. John Arena, across from the Stadium at 410 Woody Hayes Drive. It was at this arena that the Buckeyes played the 1959-60 season in which they won the National Championship. Coach Fred Taylor is in the Basketball Hall of Fame, along with 3 players on this team, although 1 is in as a coach: Jerry Lucas, John Havlicek, and "sixth man" Bob Knight.
It was also at St. John that Elvis Presley sang on June 25, 1974. Early in his carer, Elvis played 2 shows at the Franklin County Veterans Memorial Auditorium on May 26, 1956. Built in 1955, it was demolished in 2015, and an Ohio Veterans Museum is being built on the site. 300 W. Broad Street, on the Scioto River, just across from downtown. (The Beatles played in Cleveland and Cincinnati, but not in Columbus.)

Columbus has never hosted an NCAA Final Four. Nor has any other Ohio city. The 13,435-seat University of Dayton Arena, built in 1969, 74 miles west of Columbus, has hosted more NCAA Tournament games than any other facility: 107.

* Indianola Park. This was the home ground of the Columbus Pandhandles, one of the 1st professional football teams, from 1901 to 1926, before the glut of early pro football doomed them. Along with the Canton Bulldogs, in the 1910s they dominated the Ohio League, one of the NFL's predecessors.
They are best remembered for the 7 Nesser brothers (sons of German immigrants, there were 8, but Pete, 1877-1954, ironically the largest of them, didn't like football and didn't play; there were also 4 sisters): John (1875-1931), Phil (1880-1959), Ted (1883-1941), Fred (1887-1967), Frank (1889-1953), Al (1893-1967) and Ray (1898-1969, the youngest and the last survivor).

Knute Rockne, who did play a little pro football before going back to Notre Dame to coach, said, "Getting hit by a Nesser is like falling off a moving train." In 1921, Ted's son Charlie (1903-1970) played with the Panhandles, marking the only time a father and son have played in the NFL at the same time, let alone for the same team.

The Indianola Shopping Center is now on the site, 3 miles north of downtown. 1900 N. 4th Street at 19th Avenue. Number 4 bus.

* Mapfre Stadium. Opening in 1999, and known until 2015 as Columbus Crew Stadium before naming rights were sold to a Spain-based insurance company, the Crew moved into this 22,555-seat stadium after playing their 1st 3 seasons (1996-98) before 90,000 empty seats at Ohio Stadium. They won the MLS Cup in 2008, and reached the Final again in 2015, losing to the Portland Timbers despite playing at home.
The Stadium also hosted the MLS Cup Final in 2001 (San Jose beating Los Angeles), 10 games of the U.S. National Team (including 4 games against Mexico, all 2-0 or "Dos A Cero" wins), and 6 games of the 2003 Women's World Cup (including a 3-0 U.S. win over North Korea).

The Crew's long-term status is now settled, as Cleveland Browns owner Jimmy Halsam has bought them from their would-be new owners, who have now gotten an expansion franchise for Austin, Texas, instead of moving the Crew there for the 2019 season.

One Black and Gold Blvd., at 20th Avenue, about 3 1/2 miles north of downtown, near the Indianola Shopping Center. Number 4 bus.

Currently without an NBA team, a May 12, 2014 article in The New York Times shows basketball allegiances in the Columbus area are mixed between the Cleveland Cavaliers and the Miami Heat. But once you get into the suburbs, it becomes more Cavs territory. My guess: Ohio State students from elsewhere, some of whom end up staying in Columbus, stick with their old home teams; while some stick with LeBron James (who's played for both the Cavs and the Heat), and some adopted the Cavs regardless of LeBron.

The aforementioned Ohio Veterans Museum opened on October 27, 2018.

Ohio Village is a recreated 19th Century community, sort of an updated, Midwestern version of Colonial Williamsburg. 800 E. 17th Avenue, at Velma Avenue. Number 4 bus. The Columbus Museum of Art is at 480 E. Broad Street, at Washington Avenue. Number 10 bus. The Center of Science & Industry (COSI) is across from the Veterans Memorial Auditorium site, at 333 W. Broad Street, at Washington Blvd. Number 10 bus. The James Thurber House, home to the legendary author and humorist, is at 77 Jefferson Avenue,at N. 11th Street. Number 6 bus.

Farther afield -- with no public transportation available -- the Armstrong Air & Space Museum is in the hometown of Neil Armstrong, the late 1st man to walk on the Moon. 500 Apollo Drive in Wapakoneta, just off Interstate 75, 87 miles northwest of downtown Columbus.

No Presidents have come from Columbus, but Rutherford B. Hayes and William McKinley lived there while they were Governor of Ohio. Alas, there was no Governor's Mansion during their times in the office. The Ohio Governor's Residence and Heritage Garden has only been the Governor's Mansion since 1957, and current Governor John Kasich, who ran for President in 2016, already lived nearby (he'd been a Congressman for the area), and so he only uses it for official functions. 358 N. Parkview, in Bexley, about 4 miles northeast of downtown. Number 10 bus.

McKinley's historical sites are all in or near his hometown of Canton, and I discuss them in my Cleveland trip guides. Hayes' home, Spiegel Grove, and his grave and Presidential Library are in Fremont, 106 miles north of Columbus. Warren G. Harding's hometown of Marion is 51 miles north. Dying in office in 1923, he remains the last President to have lived in Ohio. As with both locations, there is no public transportation to there from any of Ohio's major cities.

Marion was also the official hometown of the Oorang Indians, a pro football team made up entirely of Native Americans, led by Hall-of-Famers Jim Thorpe and Joe Guyon. The problem wasn't that some of the players used their Native names, which included animal names like Ted Buffalo, Gray Horse, Big Bear, Eagle Feather and War Eagle. The problem is that they were party animals, not getting the rest they needed. As quarterback Leon Boutwell noted:

White people had this misconception about Indians. They thought they were all wild men, even though almost all of us had been to college and were generally more civilized than they were. Well, it was a dandy excuse to raise hell and get away with it when the mood struck us. Since we were Indians we could get away with things the whites couldn't. Don't think we didn't take advantage of it.

As a result of their wild ways, they went 3-6 in 1922, and 2-10 in 1923, and folded. I say Marion was their official hometown because they were a "traveling team," playing just 1 of their 21 games in Marion.

The Armstrong Air & Space Museum was built to honor Neil Armstrong, the 1st man to walk on the Moon, in his hometown of Wapakoneta, Ohio. The building is, naturally, shaped like a crescent moon. 500 Apollo Drive, 185 miles southwest of Cleveland, 93 miles southwest of Toledo, and 88 miles northwest of Columbus.

The tallest building in Columbus is the Rhodes State Office Tower, named for the longtime Governor who ordered the Ohio National Guard to fire on the protestors at Kent State University on May 4, 1970. Completed in 1974, it is 629 feet high, and every bit as ugly as the Administration it memorializes. 30 E. Broad Street, downtown, across from the State House.

While lots of movies have been shot and/or set in Ohio, Columbus hasn't been a popular location for them. There have been 3 TV shows set in Columbus: Family Ties, the 1982-89 NBC sitcom that introduced us to Michael J. Fox; Hope & Faith, a sitcom that ran on ABC, 2006-09; and Man Up!, an ABC sitcom set in nearby Gahanna that tanked and was canceled after 13 episodes in 2011.

Lima, the real town that was the setting for the Fox drama Glee, is 92 miles northwest of downtown Columbus. Further northwest, 152 miles from Columbus, is Sherwood, which was used as the setting for the film Heathers, with the oh-so-Middle American town's high school ironically named after Paul Westerburg, lead singer of the alternative rock band The Replacements. But both Glee and
Heathers were filmed completely in Southern California.

*

Columbus may be Ohio's largest city, but aside from being the State capital, it's known for 2 things: Ohio State football, and Ohio State anything else. But a Blue Jackets game could be fun, and it's close enough for a fairly easy New Jersey Devils roadtrip.

New Jersey Five-O

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December 18, 1969, 50 years ago: Yours truly is born at St. Barnabas Medical Center in Livingston, Essex County, New Jersey.

The neat thing about being born that week was that it was the only time that the American music charts had an Elvis Presley single and a Beatles single in the Top 5 at the same time: Elvis had "Suspicious Minds," which had hit Number 1 in early November; and the Beatles had the double-sided hit "Come Together" and "Something." which had hit Number 1 in late November.

I wouldn't mind turning 50, or being old, or having people think I'm old, or having people think I'm out of touch due to my age (which is often the case), if it wasn't for the pain that comes with advancing age.

All right, let's get the jokes out of the way. Uncle Mike is so old! How old is he? I actually have a record collection. I not only have records by the Captain and Tennille, I have records by the Private and Tennille. I know only have records by the King of Rock and Roll, I have records by the Queen of Sheba. I not only have records by John, Paul, George and Ringo; I have records by Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. I not only have records by Louis Armstrong, I have records by Louis XIV. I not only have records by Sonny & Cher, I have records by Daddy & Cher.

I'm so old, I used Preparation A. I'm so old, my 1st breakfast cereal was Product 1. I'm so old, I still think of the Six Million Dollar Man when I hear the name Steve Austin. I hear Demi, and I think Moore instead of Lovato. I hear Selena, and I think Quintanilla instead of Gomez. I hear Kylie ,and I think Minogue instead of Jenner.

I'm so old, I remember when Exxon was called Esso, when Nissan was called Datsun, and when Beijing was called Peking. I'm so old, I remember when Czechia and Slovakia were one country; when Serbia, Croatia, Bosnia and Herzegovina, Slovenia, Montenegro, North Macedonia and Kosovo were one country; and when Germany was two countries.

I'm not quite so old that I can remember when the old Madison Square Garden and the old Penn Station were open. But I am so old, I can remember when the current Garden was referred to as "The New Madison Square Garden," and when the old World Trade Center was new.

I'm so old, I can remember when Pete Rose, O.J. Simpson and Bill Cosby were beloved men on top of the world, and when Donald Trump was a man with a future. I'm so old, I can remember when Joe Biden had hair, and when Trump had good hair.

I'm so old, I can remember when unleaded gasoline was an option, and cheap. I'm so old, I can remember when McDonald's signs said, "Over 15 billion served." I'm so old, I can remember arcades having pinball machines, but no video games except Pong.

I'm so old, I can remember when a computer was too big to fit on your desk, and you couldn't take a telephone with you. Now, you can fit both in your pocket, and both can be the same machine.

I'm so old, I can remember when the last Superman was George Reeves, the last Batman was Adam West, the current Wonder Woman was Lynda Carter, there had never been a live-action Spider-Man, the current James Bond was Roger Moore, and the current Doctor Who was Tom Baker. I'm so old, I still call Star Trek: The Original Series"Star Trek," and Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope"Star Wars." I'm so old, I can remember when Sesame Street had Mr. Hooper, but not Elmo.

When I was a kid, 1990 seemed like the future. 2001: A Space Odyssey was a recent movie, and felt like the far future. It still does, since we don't have regular passenger flights to the Moon, or even into space.

I remember reading a comic book in which Batman busts a guy, and tells him, "You're going away all the way to the year 2020!" It seemed impossibly far away. Now, that year is days away.

I'm about to enter my 7th decade: 1960s, 1970s, 1980, 1990s, 2000, 2010, 2020s.

Friedrich Nietzsche was a great writer, but a lousy philosopher. That which has not managed to kill me these last 50 years has not made me stronger. But it has made me more appreciative of the things that have made me stronger.

I've put up with a lot of nonsense in 50 years. But I've also survived it. And I've had a lot of good times.

And there's been a lot of people who've helped me get that far. Some of you have done it time and time again. Some of you have done it only once. I still owe you my thanks. I could not have gotten this far without you.

I am well aware that I have a lot more yesterdays than tomorrows, and that tomorrow is promised to no one.

Fortunately, I've already been to 2 doctors this week, and, in spite of the deterioration of my leg joints, which may soon get the attention it deserves, my overall health is good.

I'm not going to sit here, and say, as Lou Gehrig did 80 years ago, knowing he was dying, that today, I consider myself the luckiest man on the face of the Earth.

But I will say what he said at the end of that speech: I might have been given a bad break, but I've got an awful lot to live for.

Thank you.

*

Some notable people with whom I share my birthday:

* The Good: Queen Christina of Sweden, 1626-1689, played in film by Greta Garbo; Charles Wesley, 1707-1788, missionary and hymn composer, brother of John Wesley, founder of the United Methodist Church, of which I am a member; John Hall, 1824-1907, Prime Minister of New Zealand 1879-1882, noted for extending voting rights; H.H. Munro, 1870-1916, Briitsh author who wrote under the pen name Saki; Edwin H. Armstrong, 1890-1954, inventor of FM radio; Fletcher Henderson, 1897-1952, jazz composer.

* Also Good; Abe Burrows, 1910-1985, author and humorist; Benjamin O. Davis Jr., 1912-2002, pilot, commander of the Tuskegee Airmen, the 1st black General in the U.S. Air Force; Willy Brandt, 1913-1992, Chancellor of Germany 1969-74; Ray Meyer, 1913-2006, Hall of Fame basketball coach at DePaul University; Betty Grable, 1916-1973, actress, the leading "pinup" of World War II; Ossie Davis, 1917-2005, actor and civil rights activist; Ramsey Clark, born 1927 and still alive, U.S. Attorney General 1967-69; Bill "Moose" Skowron, 1930-2012, Yankee 1st baseman 1954-62; Roger Smith, 1932-2017, actor, husband and manager of actress-singer Ann-Margret; Jacques Pepin, born 1935, chef; Chas Chandler, 1938-1996, bass guitarist for The Animals; Jean Pronovost, born 1945, hockey star; Steve Biko, 1946-1977, martyred South African civil rights leader; Steven Spielberg, born 1946, film director.

* Also Good: Leonard Maltin, born 1950, film critic; Ray Liotta, born 1954, actor; Brian Orser, born 1961, figure skater; Charles Oakley, born 1963, basketball player; Brad Pitt, born 1963, actor; Don Beebe, born 1964, football coach; Gianluca Pagliuca, born 1966, Italian soccer star; Arantxa Sanchez Vicario, born 1971, tennis player; Peter Boulware, born 1974, football player; Sia Furler, born 1975, singer; Katie Holmes, born 1978, actress; Christina Aguilera, born 1980, singer; Brian Boyle, born 1984, hockey player; and Billie Eilish, born 2001, singer, who recently said she didn't know who Van Halen were, and is probably better off if that was true.

* The Bad: Archduke Franz Ferdinand of Austria, 1863-1914, heir to the Austrian throne, not a good guy, his assassination was the spark that set off World War I; Ty Cobb, 1886-1961, charter member of the Baseball Hall of Fame, but frequently a rotten guy; Allen Klein, 1931-2009, managed The Beatles into the ground; Marc Rich, 1934-2013, corrupt businessman; Keith Richards, born 1943, lead guitarist for The Rolling Stones, also managed by Klein; Steven Anderson, 1964, professional wrestler known as Stone Cold Steve Austin; Casper Van Dien, born 1968, actor (not a bad guy, just a bad actor); Earl Simmons, born 1970, rapper known as DMX.

* The Ugly: Josef Stalin, 1878-1953, Soviet dictator; Robert Moses, 1888-1981, whose designs built bridges, roads, parks and beaches in New York State, but also devastated neighborhoods in New Yokr City.

*

Days until my 50th Birthday, at which point I can join AARP and get discounts for travel and game tickets: None. It's today.

Days until the premiere of the final Star Wars film, Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker: 2, this Friday.

Days until Arsenal play again: 3, this Saturday, at 7:30 AM New York time, in Premier League Group Stage action, away to Everton of Liverpool.

Days until the New Jersey Devils next play a local rival: 15, on Thursday night, January 2, 2020, against the New York Islanders, at the Barclays Center in Brooklyn. The next game against the New York Rangers, a.k.a. The Scum, will be on Thursday, January 9, at Madison Square Garden. The next game against the Philadelphia Flyers, a.k.a. The Philth, will be on Thursday, February 6, at the Wells Fargo Center.


Days until the Baseball Hall of Fame vote is announced, electing Derek Jeter: 34on January 21. Under 5 weeks.


Days until the 1st Presidential voting of 2020, the Iowa Caucuses: 47, on Monday, February 3. Under 7 weeks. The New Hampshire Primary will be 8 days later.


Days until the Yankees' 2020 Opening Day: 99, at 1:00 on Thursday, March 26, away to the Baltimore Orioles. A little over 3 months. And now, it feels as though we can look forward to it.

Days until the U.S. national soccer team plays again: 99, at 3:45 PM New York time on March 26, 2020, against the Netherlands, at Philips Stadion in Eindhoven, home of PSV Eindhoven.

Days until the Red Bulls next play a "derby": At least 100. None of their 1st 3 games will be against one of their regional rivals: The Union, New York City FC, D.C. United and the New England Revolution.

Days until the Yankees' 2020 home opener: 106, on Thursday, April 2, against the Toronto Blue Jays.

Days until the next North London Derby: 129, on Saturday, April 25, Arsenal's 1st visit to the new Tottenham Stadium, adjacent to the site of the previous White Hart Lane. A little over 4 months. It is currently scheduled to be on the 16th Anniversary of the 2nd time that Arsenal won the League at White Hart Lane -- but also the last time Arsenal won the League anywhere. Of course, for TV reasons, the game could be moved to another date, probably the next day.

Days until the next Yankees-Red Sox series begins: 177, on May 8, 2020, at Yankee Stadium II. Under 5 months. 

Days until Euro 2020 begins, a tournament being held all over Europe instead of in a single host nation: 184, on Friday, June 12, 2020. Under 6 months.

Days until the next Summer Olympics begins in Tokyo, Japan: 219, on July 24, 2020. A little over 7 months.

Days until Rutgers University plays football again: 262, on Saturday, September 5, at noon, home to Monmouth University, a Football Championship Subdivision School in West Long Branch, Monmouth County, New Jersey. In other words, if they don't win this game overwhelmingly, especially now that Greg Schiano is back as head coach, it will look very, very bad. Anyway, under 9 months.

Days until East Brunswick High School plays football again: Unknown, as the 2020 schedule has not been released yet. Most likely, the season opener will be against arch-rival Old Bridge, on Friday night, September 11, away at the purple shit pit on Route 9. That's 268 days.

Days until the next East Brunswick-Old Bridge football game: See the previous answer.

Days until the next Presidential election, when we can dump the Trump-Pence regime and elect a real Administration: 321on November 3, 2020. Under 11 months.

Days until the next Rutgers-Penn State football game: 346, on Saturday, November 28, at home. A little over 11 months.

Days until a fully-Democratic-controlled Congress can convene, and the Republicans can do nothing about it: 382, on January 3, 2021. A little over a year, or under 13 months.

Days until Liberation Day: 399at noon on January 20, 2021. A little over a year, or just over 13 months. Note that this is liberation from the Republican Party, not just from Donald Trump. Having Mike Pence as President wouldn't be better, just differently bad, mixing theocracy with plutocracy, rather than mixing kleptocracy with plutocracy.

Days until the next Winter Olympics begins in Beijing, China: 779, on February 4, 2022. A little over 2 years, or under 26 months.

Days until the next World Cup is scheduled to kick off in Qatar: 1,069, on November 21, 2022, in Qatar. Under 3 years, or a little over 35 months.

Days until the next Women's World Cup is scheduled to kick off: As yet unknown, but probably on the 2nd Friday in June 2023, which would be June 9. That would be 1,269 days, a little over 3 1/2 years, or under 42 months. A host nation is expected to be chosen on March 20, 2020. Bids have bee put in by Brazil (South America has never hosted), Colombia (ditto), Japan (Asia last hosted in 2007), and a joint bid by Australia and New Zealand (Oceania has never hosted).

What the World Was Like When I Was Born

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December 18, 1969, 50 years ago today: Yours truly was born in Livingston, Essex County, New Jersey. This is what the world was like at the time:

There was an American League team in Washington, D.C., and it wasn't the Nationals, it was the Senators. There was also an American League team in Washington State, in Seattle, as there is now, but it wasn't the Mariners. It was the Pilots, who would, before the next season dawned, fill a 4-year void (save for a few "home games" in 1968 and '69 by the Chicago White Sox) and become the Milwaukee Brewers. The Houston Astros were in the National League. There were still minor-league teams in Dallas, Denver, Phoenix, Miami and the Tampa Bay area.

There were black players and Hispanic players in Major League Baseball, but no Asian players, and no designated hitter. Only the Astrodome in Houston had a roof, and it was not retractable. There was no regular-season Interleague Play.

The Pilots/Brewers, the Kansas City Royals, the Montreal Expos, and the San Diego Padres had all just debuted, and, between them, lost 411 games that season. The Baltimore Orioles won 109 games, a match for the most games won between 1954 and 1998... and still lost the World Series.

Every major league ballpark had lights except Wrigley Field in Chicago. But only one, the Astrodome, had artificial turf.  That would soon change, as, the following season, multipurpose stadiums would open in Cincinnati and Pittsburgh with the plastic stuff, and in Philadelphia a year after that, while St. Louis, San Francisco and, strangely, Comiskey Park in Chicago would all put it down for a few years, before tearing it back up and replacing it with real grass.

But, for the moment, there were still 11 of the 24 teams playing in ballparks built before World War II, and 7 of them built in 1912 or earlier.  Indeed, there were still 3 ballparks standing -- Comiskey, Connie Mack Stadium in Philadelphia (formerly Shibe Park) and Forbes Field in Pittsburgh -- that had hosted not just Cy Young Award winners, but Cy Young himself.

Of the 24 ballparks used by MLB teams that year, only 9 still stand, and only 5 are still in use by the teams then using them: Fenway, Wrigley, Dodger Stadium and Angel Stadium in the Los Angeles area, and the Oakland Coliseum. Still standing but no longer being used by an MLB team: Robert F. Kennedy Stadium in Washington (scheduled for demolition in 2021), San Diego Stadium (now SDCCU Stadium) and the Astrodome (dormant, its future uncertain).

The only NFL team still in the same stadium they were in for the 1969 season are the Green Bay Packers (Lambeau Field). The Los Angeles Rams and Oakland Raiders left the ones they used for 1969, and returned, but both are about to leave again, the Rams for a dome in suburban Inglewood, the Raiders for Las Vegas.

From the NBA and the NHL combined, only one arena remains from the 1969-70 season that was being played: Madison Square Garden in New York, then billed as "the New Madison Square Garden Center," but now older than the "Old Garden" that it replaced.

Major League Baseball celebrated the 100th Anniversary of professional baseball, with an all-time team that proclaimed Babe Ruth "Baseball's Greatest Player Ever" and Joe DiMaggio "Baseball's Greatest Living Player." Also on their list of greatest living players, but like Joe D no longer living today, were George Sisler, Charlie Gehringer, Joe Cronin, Pie Traynor, Ted Williams, Bill Dickey, Lefty Grove and Bob Feller. The only one still alive from that team is Willie Mays, still active at that time.
The National Football League celebrated its 50th season (the next year would be its 50th
Anniversary) with an all-time team, with members like Johnny Unitas, Sammy Baugh, Marion Motley, Don Hutson, Forrest Gregg, Mel Hein, Gino Marchetti, Leo Nomellini, Ray Nitschke, Dick "Night Train" Lane and Emlen Tunnell. All of these men were then all still alive. Unitas, Gregg and Nitschke were still active. All of them are now dead.
The NFL, in the process of being merged with the AFL, and had a combined total of 26 teams. There was a team in Baltimore, but it wasn't the Ravens. There was one in St. Louis, but it wasn't the Rams. There was one in Houston, but it wasn't the Texans.

The Boston Patriots had yet to move out to the suburbs and became "the New England Patriots." The Patriots, 49ers, Raiders, Dallas Cowboys, Miami Dolphins and Pittsburgh Steelers had yet to win any World Championships. The Seattle Seahawks and Tampa Bay Buccaneers did not exist, nor did the Baltimore Ravens under that name. Between them, those teams have now won 29 Super Bowls.

Some of the NFL's founding fathers were not only still alive, but still involved: George Halas with the Chicago Bears, Art Rooney with the Steelers, and Dan Reeves with the Rams – no relation to the Cowboys running back of the same name, later to be head coach of the Broncos, Giants and Atlanta Falcons. 

The defending World Champions in the 4 major sports were the Mets, the Jets, the Boston Celtics and the Montreal Canadiens. Yes, the Mets and the Jets were both World Champions, and the Knicks were about to be. Stop laughing. The Jets had actually won a title before the Knicks, who were now -- if you didn't count the American Basketball Association's New York Nets, out on Long Island -- the only New York team without a World Championship. But that would soon change.

The Heavyweight Championship of the World was split following Muhammad Ali being stripped of the title. The World Boxing Council (WBC) recognized Joe Frazier as Champion, while the World Boxing Association (WBA) recognized Jimmy Ellis. On February 16, 1970, they settled things at Madison Square Garden. Having never been knocked down (though he had been defeated), Ellis was knocked down twice in the 4th round, and the referee stopped the fight before the 5th, and Frazier was Champion. He really settled things at The Garden a year later, beating Ali.

What were the defining baseball players of my childhood doing at this time? Reggie Jackson had just finished his 2nd full season, in which he hit 47 home runs. Thurman Munson and Carlton Fisk had recently made their big-league debuts.

Tom Seaver and Nolan Ryan had helped the Mets to their Miracle – but, at this point, if you had bet then that neither one would ever win another World Championship, people would have laughed at you. (Of course, at that point, they also would have laughed if you had then bet that Ryan would win more games in the majors than Seaver.) Steve Carlton had recently struck out 19 Mets in a game, setting a new National League record -- and losing, because Ron Swoboda hit 2 home runs.
 
Pete Rose won his 2nd straight NL batting title, and his Cincinnati Reds teammate Johnny Bench had a pretty good season, but they hadn't yet won their 1st Pennant, Cincinnati's 1st since 1961. That would come the next season. Willie Stargell had just become the 1st player to hit a home run completely out of Dodger Stadium. Rod Carew had just won his 1st American League batting title. Carl Yastrzemski hit 40 home runs and drove in 111 runs, but his Red Sox had already changed significantly from their "Impossible Dream" Pennant team of 2 years earlier.

Mike Schmidt was still playing at Ohio University (not to be confused with The… Ohio State University, whose football team had just blown a 2nd straight National Championship by getting upset by arch-rival Michigan), and had yet to face a professional pitch. George Brett was still at El Segundo High School in Los Angeles County.

The head coaches of the major league teams then playing in the New York Tri-State Area were Ralph Houk of the Yankees, Gil Hodges of the Mets, Alex Webster of the Giants, Weeb Ewbank of the Jets, Red Holzman of the Knicks, York Larese of the Nets, and Emile Francis of the Rangers. Only Francis is still alive. The Islanders wouldn't begin play for another 3 years, the Devils for 13, the Red Bulls for 26, the Liberty for 27, NYCFC for 45.

Of the current coaches of the Tri-State Area teams: Barry Trotz of the Islanders was 7 years old. So was Domenec Torrent of New York City FC, who was just relieved of his duties, but his successor has not yet been named. Mike Miller of the Knicks was 5, Pat Shurmur of the Giants was 4, David Quinn of the Rangers was 3, and Kenny Atkinson of the Nets was 2. Aaron Boone of the Yankees, Carlos Beltran of the Mets, Adam Gase of the Jets, Katie Smith of the Liberty, Alain Nasreddine of the Devils and Chris Armas of the Red Bulls weren't born yet.

The Olympic Games have since been held in America 4 times, Canada 3 times; Japan, Russia and Korea twice; and once each in Germany, Austria, Bosnia, France, Spain, Norway, Australia, Greece, Italy, China, Britain and Brazil. The World Cup has since been held twice each in Mexico and Germany, and once each in America, Argentina, Spain, Italy, France, Japan, Korea, South Africa, Brazil and Russia.

The University of Texas had just beaten the University of Arkansas to win yet another college football "Game of the Century," and would beat Notre Dame in the Cotton Bowl to win the National Championship. It was the 1st time Notre Dame had accepted a bowl bid since their "Four Horsemen" went to the 1925 Rose Bowl. The University of California at Los Angeles (UCLA) was about to win its 4th straight National Championship in college basketball, their 6th overall, and this time without a dominant center.

UCLA's recently-graduated dominating center, Lew Alcindor, was winning the NBA Rookie of the Year with the Milwaukee Bucks, who got him because they finished tied with the Phoenix Suns with the worst record in the NBA the season before (each club's 1st season), and the tie was broken when… the Bucks won a coin toss. Unfair? Perhaps: The Bucks did get a title out of it, in 1971, but haven't won one since. The Suns have never won one, although, like the Bucks, they've usually been good. Soon after that title, Alcindor changed his name to Kareem Abdul-Jabbar.


There were then 25 Amendments to the Constitution of the United States. There was, as yet, no Environmental Protection Agency, Title IX or legalized abortion. The Stonewall Riot had happened less than 6 months earlier. 

Richard Nixon was President of the United States. Harry Truman and Lyndon Johnson were still alive. So was the widow of Dwight D. Eisenhower, who had died earlier in the year. Gerald Ford was the Minority Leader of the U.S. House of Representatives. Jimmy Carter was a former State Senator in Georgia, about to run his 2nd, much more successful, campaign for Governor. Ronald Reagan was in his 1st term as Governor of California. 
Keep smiling, Tricky Dick. We know how the story ends.

George Herbert Walker Bush was a Congressman from Texas, and his son George had entered the Texas Air National Guard. Apparently, it was okay for him and his father to support the Vietnam War even if he didn't have to actually fight in it. Bill Clinton did not support the war, and managed to avoid service through means that, if not entirely ethical, were, at least, legal. He was then a Rhodes Scholar at Oxford University. Hillary Rodham had just entered Yale Law School. Barack Obama was in grade school.


Donald Trump was at the University of Pennsylvania, having gotten 5 deferments, including one for bone spurs in his heel, not that anyone believed that. Joe Biden, who got a deferment due to asthma, had just gotten elected to the New Castle County Council in Delaware. Nancy Pelosi was working for San Francisco-based Congressman Philip Burton, whose seat she would win in 1986. Her brother, Thomas D'Alesandro Jr., like their father before them, was then Mayor of Baltimore.
Trump actually had decent hair then.
He was still an indecent person.

The Governor of New York was Nelson Rockefeller, having made 3 unsuccessful runs for President. The Mayor of New York City was John Lindsay, who had just been denied renomination by the City's Republican Party because of his poor handling of snow removal during the blizzard earlier in the year. But he ran as a 3rd-party nominee and won a 2nd term anyway.

The Governor of New Jersey was Richard J. Hughes, about to wrap up his 2nd term. Former Governor Robert B. Meyner had tried to get the office back, but lost to South Jersey Congressman William T. Cahill, who became the State's 1st Republican Governor in 16 years (8 of Meyner, 8 of Hughes).

There were still living people who were veterans of the Indian Wars, the Mahdist War, the Northwest Rebellion; competitors at the 1st modern Olympics in 1896, and in every World Series except those of 1905, 1906 and 1907.

The United Nations' International Labor Organization had just be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. The Pope was Paul VI. The current Pope, Benedict XVI, then Father Joseph Ratzinger, was teaching in his native Germany, at the University of Regensburg. There have since been 8 Presidents of the United States, 8 Prime Ministers of Britain and 4 Popes.


Canada's Prime Minister was Pierre Trudeau. He was young (51), dashing and charismatic. It was as if John F. Kennedy was singing lead for the Beatles – in French. Canada, as I said, now had its 1st Major League Baseball team, the Montreal Expos. And a group called The Guess Who had just become Canada's biggest rock band ever (to that point). For the first time ever, Canada was hip. Especially if you were an American worrying about being drafted. 
Elizabeth II was Queen of England -- that still hasn't changed -- but she was just 43 years old. Britain's Prime Minister was Harold Wilson. The English Football League season that was underway would be won by Everton, the "other club" in Liverpool, and the FA Cup, for the 1st time, would be won by London's Chelsea.
Queen Elizabeth, 43, looking a bit like my grandmother did at that time.
Prince Charles, 19, looking a bit like I did at the same age.

In the season that ended earlier in the year, the League was won by Leeds United, and the FA Cup was won by Manchester City, the defending League Champions, beating Leicester City 1-0 on a goal by Neil Young – no, not that Neil Young.

AC Milan, led by perhaps Italy's greatest player ever, Gianni Rivera, won their 2nd European Cup by beating Ajax Amsterdam, led by 21-year-old wunderkind Johan Cruijff. Ajax and their "Total Football" would be back, big-time. The current season's European Cup would be won by the other major Dutch team of the time, Rotterdam's Feyenoord.


Major novels of the year included The Godfather by Mario Puzo, Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut, The Andromeda Strain by Michael Crichton, The French Lieutenant’s Woman by John Fowles, Portnoy’s Complaint by my fellow native of Essex Count, New Jersey, Philip Roth, Rich Man, Poor Man by Irwin Shaw, and The Seven Minutes by Irving Wallace (about a novel, of the same title, that was "the most banned book in history," containing a woman's thoughts during 7 minutes of sex).

There was also Naked Came the Stranger by Peneleope Ashe. This was a name used for a composite of 24 authors, conspiring to see if a novel could be really, really bad, but still sell big if it had a lot of sex scenes in it. This was a truly late-Sixties kind of experiment – and it worked.

Major non-fiction books included the career-launching memoir I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou and the career-launching historical work Mary, Queen of Scots by Antonia Fraser.

J.R.R. Tolkein was still alive. Tom Clancy, rejected by the U.S. Army due to poor eyesight, had gone to work for an insurance company. Anne Rice was a graduate student at the University of California, having witnessed the People's Park demonstration earlier in the year. Stephen King was at the University of Maine. George R.R. Martin was at Northwestern University. John Grisham was in high school. J.K. Rowling was 4 years old.

No one had yet heard of John Rambo, Spenser: For Hire, George Smiley, The Punisher, Rocky Balboa, T.S. Garp, Arthur Dent, Jason Bourne, Hannibal Lecter, Celie Harris, Kinsey Millhone, Jack Ryan, Forrest Gump, John McClane, Alex Cross, Bridget Jones, Robert Langdon, Bella Swan, Lisbeth Salander or Katniss Everdeen.


The films On Her Majesty's Secret Service (George Lazenby's debut, and farewell, as James Bond) and Anne of the Thousand Days (starring Genevieve Bujold as Anne Boleyn and Richard Burton as King Henry VIII) were released on the exact day that I was born. The Adam West version of Batman
had been canceled a year and a half earlier, and Bob Holiday, in the 1966 Broadway musical It's a Bird... It's a Plane... It's Superman, was the most recent live-action Man of Steel. Jon Pertwee was about to begin playing The Doctor.
"My name is... wait, this never happened to the other fella."

Other films out at the time were the film version of Hello, Dolly! with Barbra Streisand; They Shoot Horses, Don't They?The Undefeated, a Western starring John Wayne and Rock Hudson; and Change of Habit, with Elvis Presley playing an inner-city doctor (seriously) who unintentionally tempts a nun played by Mary Tyler Moore. It was Elvis' last feature film, and it's one of his better ones. It was also the 1st time that Mary worked with Ed Asner, with The Mary Tyler Moore Show yet to come.
Reminding The Beatles, and everybody else,
who's King around here, anyway.

In 1963, Elvis had appeared in It Happened at the World's Fair. This film was the film debut of Kurt Russell, 11 years old at the time of filming. In 1969, Elvis' character in Change of Habit was named John Carpenter. In 1979, Russell played the King of Rock and Roll in the TV-movie Elvis. It was directed by John Carpenter, who would also direct Russell in a few other films, including The Thing.

George Lucas and Francis Ford Coppola had just founded American Zoetrope Studios, but Lucas had yet to make a full-length feature film. This was also then true of Steven Spielberg. Martin Scorcese had made 1, Who's That Knocking At My Door? Michael Douglas was 25 years old and filming Adam at Six A.M. His future wife, Catherine Zeta-Jones, was almost 3 months old. No one had yet heard of John Shaft, Leatherface, Damien Thorn, Howard Beale, Michael Myers, Jason Voorhees or Freddy Krueger.

Television shows that debuted in that season included Room 222Marcus Welby, M.D., Medical CenterThe Brady Bunch, and kids' shows Sesame StreetH.R. Pufnstuf and Scooby-Doo, Where Are You? From Britain came the debuts of Monty Python’s Flying Circus and The Benny Hill Show.  
Zoinks!

Star Trek aired its last first-run episode 6 months earlier. As series star William Shatner put it, "We all thought it was over!" As series creator Gene Roddenberry put it, "Six weeks later, man landed on the Moon. Suddenly, traveling to space didn't seem all that strange anymore." The original show was a victim of timing.

Or was it? It was soon picked up in syndication, and, like The Honeymooners before it and The Odd Couple after it, also shown on New York's WPIX-Channel 11, it gained a massive following that it never got on its original network.

That didn't help Roddenberry -- at least, not yet. He had just gotten divorced, and had just seen his pet project get canceled, had sworn he would never write for television again, and was now writing a sexploitation film, Pretty Maids All in a Row. Despite being directed by Roger Vadim, and starring Rock Hudson, Angie Dickinson, Telly Savalas, Keenan Wynn, Roddy McDowell, Star Trek veterans James Doohan and William Campbell, and future The Secrets of Isis star Joanna Cameron, it flopped upon its 1971 release.

No one had yet heard of Mary Richards, Keith Patridge, Archie Bunker, Kwai Chang Caine, Fred Sanford, Bob Hartley, Theo Kojak, Arthur Fonzarelli, Barney Miller, Basil Fawlty, J.R. Ewing, Mork from Ork, Jake and Elwood Blues, William Adama, Arnold Jackson, Ken Reeves, Mario and Luigi, Derek "Del Boy" Trotter, Sam Malone, Christine Cagney and Mary Beth Lacey, He-Man, Edmund Blackadder, Goku, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the Thundercats, Bart Simpson, Hayden Fox, Zack Morris, Dale Cooper, The Seinfeld Four, Buffy Summers, Fox Mulder, Andy Sipowicz, Doug Ross, Alan Partridge, Ross Geller and Rachel Greene, Xena, Ash Ketchum, Carrie Bradshaw, Tony Soprano, Jed Bartlet, Master Chief, Jack Bauer, Omar Little, Michael Bluth, Leroy Jethro Gibbs, Rick Grimes, Bette Porter, Michael Scott, Don Draper, Walter White, Jax Teller, Richard Castle, Leslie Knope, Sarah Manning, Jane "Eleven" Hopper and Maggie Bell.

Robert Kardashian was in law school, Bruce Jenner was playing college football in Iowa, Kristen Mary Houghton was about to turn 14, and none of them knew each other yet.

The Number 1 song in America on the day I was born was "Na Na Hey Hey Kiss Him Goodbye" by Steam. They were not a real group, just a bunch of studio musicians, and the song is better known by its chorus: "Na na na na... Na na na na... hey hey hey, Goodbye!"

The month before, and it was the only month in which it would ever be true, both Elvis and the Beatles had Number 1 hits: Elvis had "Suspicious Minds" and the Beatles had the double-sided hit "Come Together" (written by John Lennon) and "Something" (which Frank Sinatra would call "the greatest love song of the last 50 years" after hailing Lennon and Paul McCartney as great songwriters, even though it was written by George Harrison).
Ironically, the one who this photo was said to have "proved" he was dead,
and is holding a cigarette, in this photo, is still alive.

The Supremes also had their last hit with Diana Ross, and it would become their last Number 1: "Someday We'll Be Together." Led Zeppelin had their highest-charting single (in the U.S., anyway), "Whole Lotta Love." Sinatra had hit with Paul Anka's song "My Way." Louis Armstrong and Duke Ellington were still alive and performing. Bob Dylan had hit with his country-themed album Nashville Skyline, Johnny Cash had a variety show on ABC, and each helped the other's comeback when Cash invited Dylan to appear on his show.

The Jackson 5 had just had their 1st hit, putting Michael Jackson into the national consciousness for the 1st time. David Bowie was riding the success of "Space Oddity." Elton John released his debut solo album, Empty Sky. Bruce Springsteen had just formed a band named Steel Mill, Billy Joel one named Attila.

Hippies were all the rage, although they would have been shocked that it would take until 2012 for recreational marijuana use to be legal in any State. The gay rights movement had really kicked off in June, but at the time, I don't think anyone involved expected that gay marriage would be legal in their lifetimes, in even a few States.
A noted photo from Woodstock, August 17, 1969. Bobbi Kelly and Nick Ercoline.
The same couple now. They married in 1971 and are still together.

Inflation has been such that what $1.00 would buy then, $6.82 would buy now. A U.S. postage stamp was 6 cents. A New York Subway token was 20 cents. The average prices of a gallon of gas was 35 cents, a cup of coffee 42 cents, a McDonald's meal 79 cents (49 cents of that being the recently-introduced Big Mac), a movie ticket $1.20, a new car around $2,300, and a new house $28,100. The Dow Jones Industrial Average closed that day at 783.79.
Photo taken from Ellis Island, 1969.
Note the original World Trade Center under construction.

The tallest building in the world was the Empire State Building, but the World Trade Center complex was under construction. There were no portable telephones, unless you count car phones. Only about half of American homes had color television sets. There were no video games -- there were arcades, but they were still based on pinball machines, as told in The Who's rock opera of that year, Tommy.

There were artificial kidneys, but no artificial hearts. There were birth control pills, but no Viagra. Credit cards were still a relatively new thing, and the 1st automatic teller machine in America had just gone into operation. There were no tabletop, let alone desktop or laptop, computers. Steve Jobs, Bill Gates and Tim Berners-Lee were all 14 years old. But at least then, we could legitimately say, "We can put a man on the Moon, so why can't we... ?"

Toward the end of 1969, the first draft lottery of the Vietnam War era was held. The 1st Boeing 747 made its maiden flight, from Seattle to New York. Black Panther Party members Fred Hampton and Mark Clark were assassinated by Chicago police officers. Labor leader Jock Yablonski was assassinated on the order of a rival.

And 2 people were murdered at a rock concert at the Altamont Speedway in California's East Bay region, while the Rolling Stones sang "Gimme Shelter," thus providing both a stark contrast to Woodstock 4 months earlier and a painful end to the 1960s for rock and roll fans.

Joseph Kennedy Sr., and Josef von Sternberg, and Ruth White, an actress from Perth Amboy, New Jersey who had recently appeared in Midnight Cowboy, died. (She was 55 and had cancer, while the others were much older.) Shawn Carter (a.k.a. Jay-Z), and Kristy Swanson (the 1st Buffy the Vampire Slayer), and Julie Delpy were born. And, on the exact same day that I was born, so was a Major League Baseball player, Joe Randa, a 3rd baseman who played from 1995 to 2006, mostly for the Kansas City Royals.
Joe Randa

That's what life was like when I was born, on December 18, 1969. It was a different time.

Aren't they all?

How to Be a Devils Fan In Chicago -- 2019-20 Edition

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This coming Monday, the New Jersey Devils face the Chicago Blackhawks, at the United Center in Chicago. (I'm cutting this one a little close.)

Hog Butcher for the World,
Tool Maker, Stacker of Wheat,
Player with Railroads and the Nation’s Freight Handler,
Stormy, husky, brawling,
City of the Big Shoulders:

They tell me you are wicked and I believe them, for I have seen your painted women under the gas lamps luring the farm boys.

And they tell me you are crooked and I answer: Yes, it is true I have seen the gunman kill and go free to kill again.

And they tell me you are brutal and my reply is: On the faces of women and children I have seen the marks of wanton hunger.

And having answered so I turn once more to those who sneer at this my city, and I give them back the sneer and say to them:

Come and show me another city with lifted head singing so proud to be alive and coarse and strong and cunning.

Flinging magnetic curses amid the toil of piling job on job, here is a tall bold slugger set vivid against the little soft cities;

Fierce as a dog with tongue lapping for action, cunning as a savage pitted against the wilderness,

Bareheaded, shoveling, wrecking, planning, building, breaking, rebuilding,
Under the smoke, dust all over his mouth, laughing with white teeth,
Under the terrible burden of destiny laughing as a young man laughs,
Laughing even as an ignorant fighter laughs who has never lost a battle,
Bragging and laughing that under his wrist is the pulse.
And under his ribs the heart of the people, laughing!

Laughing the stormy, husky, brawling laughter of Youth, half-naked, sweating, proud to be Hog Butcher, Tool Maker, Stacker of Wheat, Player with Railroads and Freight Handler to the Nation.

-- Carl Sandburg, 1916.

Sandburg knew. He was right then. He is still right now. And this legendary poem "Chicago" fits the Blackhawks, one of the National Hockey League's traditional "roughhouse" teams.

Before You Go. Chicago weather can be unpredictable. This game being played in mid-November, cold weather can be expected. However, the arena is 3 miles inland from Lake Michigan, so the local wind, a.k.a. The Hawk (not named for the hockey team), which tends to produce "Bear Weather," won't be that much of a problem while you're right outside.

The Chicago Tribune is predicting temperatures to be in the high 40s during daylight, and the mid-30s at night. The Chicago Sun-Times backs up its rivals' temperature predictions.

Wait until you cross into Illinois to change your clocks. Indiana used to be 1 of 2 States, Arizona being the other, where Daylight Savings Time was an issue; however, since 2006 -- 4 years after a West Wing episode lampooned this -- the State has used it throughout. Once you cross into Illinois, you'll be moving from Eastern to Central Daylight Time.

Tickets. The Blackhawks lead the League in per-game attendance every season: 22,374 last season. Even now that the Cubs have finally won a World Series, the Hawks are the toughest ticket in town. Which, as you might guess, makes them expensive, more expensive than Bulls tickets. (Think of how silly that would have sounded in 1998, or even in 2009.)

And so, tickets are expensive. Seats in the lower and club levels, the 100 and 200 sections, are $246 between the goals and $233 behind them. In the upper level, the 300 sections, they're $90 between and $112 behind. Standing-room tickets are $45.

I would, however, recommend avoiding Sections 321 to 330 in the upper deck, behind the west goal, because that's the Blackhawk equivalent of the 400 level, the old "Blue Seats," at Madison Square Garden.

Getting There. Keep in mind that this is Christmas week, so tickets will be fewer in availability and considerably more expensive than normal. Amtrak is sold out, so the information for them is the usual, but does not apply this week.

Chicago is 792 land miles from New York. Knowing this, your first reaction is going to be to fly out there. Unlike some other Midwestern cities, this is a good idea if you can afford it. You might be able to get flights, nonstop in both directions, for under $800.

O'Hare International Airport (named for Lt. Cmdr. Edward "Butch" O'Hare, the U.S. Navy's 1st flying ace, who was nevertheless shot down over the Pacific in World War II), at the northwestern edge of the city, is United Airlines' headquarters, so nearly every flight they have from the New York area's airports to there is nonstop, so it'll be 3 hours, tarmac to tarmac, and about 2 hours going back.

The Chicago Transit Authority (CTA) Blue Line train will take you from O'Hare to the downtown elevated (or "L") tracks that run in "The Loop" (the borders of which are Randolph, Wells, Van Buren and Wabash Streets) in 45 minutes. From Midway Airport, the Orange Line train can get you to the Loop. Both should take about 45 minutes.

Bus? Greyhound's run between the 2 cities, launched 5 times per day, is relatively easy, but long, averaging about 18 hours, and is $330 round-trip -- but can drop to as low as $142, less than half, on Advanced Purchase. Only 1 of the 5 runs goes straight there without requiring you to change buses: The one leaving Port Authority Bus Terminal at 10:15 PM (Eastern) and arriving at Chicago at 2:30 PM (Central). This includes half-hour rest stops at Milesburg, Pennsylvania and Elkhart, Indiana, and an hour-and-a-half stopover in Cleveland.

The station is at 630 W. Harrison Street at Des Plaines Street. (If you've seen one of my favorite movies, Midnight Run, this is a new station, not the one seen in that 1988 film.) The closest CTA stop is Clinton on the Blue Line, around the corner, underneath the elevated Dwight D. Eisenhower Expressway.
Doesn't look like a major transportation hub, does it?

Train? Amtrak's Lake Shore Limited (formerly known as the Twentieth Century Limited when the old New York Central Railroad ran it from Grand Central Terminal to Chicago's LaSalle Street Station) leaves New York's Penn Station at 3:40 every afternoon, and arrives at Union Station at 225 South Canal Street at Adams Street in Chicago at 9:50 every morning. It leaves Chicago at 9:30 every evening, and returns to New York at 6:23 the following night.
Usually, it's $220 round-trip, very cheap per mile by Amtrak standards. The closest CTA stop is Quincy/Wells, in the Loop, but that's 6 blocks away – counting the Chicago River as a block; Union Station is, literally, out of the Loop.
If you do decide to walk from Union Station to the Loop, don't look up at the big black thing you pass. That's the Willis Tower, formerly known as the Sears Tower, which, until the new World Trade Center was topped off, was the tallest building in North America, which it had officially been since it opened in 1974, surpassing the old WTC. If there's one thing being in New York should have taught you, it's this: "Don't look up at the tall buildings, or you'll look like a tourist."
But since you've come all this way, it makes sense to get a hotel, so take a cab from Union Station or Greyhound to the hotel – unless you're flying in, in which case you can take the CTA train to within a block of a good hotel. There are also hotels near the airports.

If you decide to drive, it's far enough that it will help to get someone to go with you and split the duties, and to trade off driving and sleeping. The directions are rather simple, down to (quite literally) the last mile. You'll need to get into New Jersey, and take Interstate 80 West. You'll be on I-80 for the vast majority of the trip, through New Jersey, Pennsylvania and Ohio. In Ohio, in the western suburbs of Cleveland, I-80 will merge with Interstate 90. From this point onward, you won't need to think about I-80 until you head home; I-90 is now the key, and will take you right past Union Station the Loop.

If you do it right, you should spend about an hour and a half in New Jersey, 5 hours and 15 minutes in Pennsylvania, 4 hours in Ohio, 2 hours and 30 minutes in Indiana, and half an hour in Illinois before you reach the exit for your hotel. That's 13 hours and 45 minutes. Counting rest stops, preferably halfway through Pennsylvania and just after you enter both Ohio and Indiana, and accounting for traffic in both New York and Chicago, it should be no more than 18 hours, which would save you time on both Greyhound and Amtrak, if not on flying.

Once In the City. A derivation of a Native American name, "Chikagu" was translated as "Place of the onion," as there were onion fields there before there was a white settlement. Some have suggested that the translation is a little off, that it should be "Place of the skunk." Others have said, either way, it means "Place of the big stink."

Founded in 1831, so by Northeastern standards it's a young city, Chicago's long-ago nickname of "the Second City" is no longer true, as its population has dropped, and Los Angeles' has risen, to the point where L.A. has passed it, and Chicago is now the 3rd-largest city in America. But at 2.7 million within the city limits, and 9.5 million in the metropolitan area, it's still a huge city -- and if you divide the Los Angeles market equally between the Kings and the Ducks, that makes Chicago the largest market in the NHL. If you count Anaheim separately, boosting the Kings' share, then Chicago falls to 2nd place.

The "Loop" is the connected part of the Chicago Transit Authority (CTA)'s elevated railway (sometimes written as "El" or "L") downtown: Over Wells Street on the west, Van Buren Street on the south, Wabash Street on the east and State Street on the north. Inside the Loop, the east-west streets are Lake, Randolph, Washington, Madison, Monroe, Adams, Jackson and Van Buren; the north-south streets are Wells, LaSalle (Chicago's "Wall Street"), Clark, Dearborn, State and Wabash.

The city's street-address centerpoint is in the Loop, at State & Madison Streets. Madison separates North from South, while State separates East from West. The street grid is laid out so that every 800 on the house numbers is roughly 1 mile. As the United Center is at 1901 West Madison Street, and on the 3600 block of North Sheffield Avenue, now you know it's on the main east-west axis, and a little more than 2 miles west of State Street and the center of the Loop.

Chicago has 2 "beltways": Interstate 294 forms an inner one, while Interstates 290 and 355 form an outer one. It also has highways named for 3 Presidents, and 1 defeated Presidential nominee from the Chicago area.

I-290 is the Eisenhower Expressway; a run that goes from I-90 to I-94 to I-190 is the Kennedy Expressway; I-88 from the suburbs west to the Mississippi River in Iowa is the Ronald Reagan Memorial Tollway (it passes his birthplace of Tampico and other towns where he grew up); and the Cook County portion of I-55 is the Stevenson Expressway, named for Adlai Ewing Stevenson II, grandson of Grover Cleveland's 2nd Vice President, Governor of Illinois 1949-53, and Dwight D. Eisenhower's defeated opponent of 1952 and 1956.

The CTA's rapid-rail system is both underground (subway) and above-ground (elevated), although the El is better-known, standing as a Chicago icon alongside the Sears Tower, Wrigley Field, Michael Jordan, deep-dish pizza, and less savory things like municipal corruption, Mrs. O'Leary's cow and Al Capone. The single-ride fare is $2.50 for the El, $2.25 for the bus. A 1-day pass is $10, and a 3-day pass is $20.
(By the way, the Great Chicago Fire of 1871 was more likely the result of Mr. O'Leary hosting a poker game in his barn, in which he, or one of his friends, dropped cigar ash, rather than Mrs. O'Leary's cow, knocking a lantern, onto some hay.)

I was actually in Chicago on the day they switched from tokens to farecards: June 1, 1999. It took me by surprise, as I had saved 10 tokens from my previous visit. I was able to use them all, because I'd gotten there 2 days before.

Illinois' State sales tax is 6.25 percent, but in the City of Chicago it's 9.25 percent -- higher than New York's. So don't be shocked when you see prices: Like New York, Boston and Washington, Chicago is an expensive city.

ZIP Codes in the Chicago area start with the digits 60. The Area Code is 312, with 708 and 847 in the suburbs. Just as New York's electric company is Consolidated Edison, or "Con Ed," Northern Illinois' is Commonwealth Edison, or "ComEd," which confused the heck out of me the 1st time I heard it.

Chicago's legendary crime problem has evolved: It's no longer Al Capone-style gangs running things, it's poor kids with guns. So whatever precautions you take when you're in New York, take them in Chicago as well.

Demographically, Chicago is split almost right down the middle: 32.4 percent black, 31.7 percent white, 28.9 percent Hispanic, with Asians trailing at 5.4 percent. The South Side is the largest black neighborhood in the country, ahead of even New York's Harlem, and the West Side also has a large ghetto. But there are clumps of Irish and Poles on the South Side, and the Daley family lived in Bridgeport, a few blocks from Comiskey Park, and were White Sox fans.

The North Side is now roughly split between white and Hispanic, with many Mexicans intermarrying with the Irish, Italians and Poles of the North and Northwest Sides, due to their common Catholicism.

Just as the stereotype of New Yorkers getting old is moving to Florida, when Chicagoans get old, they tend to go to Arizona. Part of that is due to baseball, as Cubs owner Phil Wrigley owned a hotel in the Phoenix area, and moved the team's Spring Training there. The White Sox moved their Spring Training there as well.

Chicago has beaches! If not boardwalks. Lake Michigan even has tides. You can swim or get a tan while seeing a spectacular skyline -- something difficult, though not impossible, to do in New York City -- at Montrose Beach, 4400 N. Lake Shore Drive (Bus 146 to Marine Drive and Montrose, then a 15-minute walk east); Oakwood Beach, 4100 S. Lake Shore Drive (Red Line to 47th Street, then Bus 43 to Oakenwald & 43rd, then a 10-minute walk over Lake Shore Drive and north); and 57th Street Beach, 5700 S. Lake Shore Drive (Bus 10 to the Museum of Science and Industry, then a 10-minute walk east).

Going In. From 1929 to 1994, the NHL's Chicago Blackhawks played at Chicago Stadium, "the Madhouse on Madison," at 1800 W. Madison Street at Wood Street. The NBA's Bulls played there from 1967 to 1994.
The United Center opened across the street at 1901 W. Madison at Honore Street. Naming rights were bought by the O'Hare-based airline. The public transportation situation is a little tricky. You can take the CTA Blue Line to Illinois Medical District Station, and then walk 2 blocks up Ogden Avenue and 5 blocks up Wood Street. Or you can take the Green Line or the Pink Line (no joke: The CTA acutally does have a Pink Line) to Ashland, walk 4 blocks down Ashland Avenue, and then walk 3 blocks down Madison Street. The best way is to take the Number 20 bus, which goes right down Madison.
If you drive in, parking can be had for as little as $5.00. What you don't want to do is park outside of official lots. In a 1992 article, in advance of Chicago Stadium hosting the NBA and Stanley Cup Finals at the same time, a writer for Sports Illustrated suggested that, due to their success having been more recent, Bulls fans were much more likely than Blackhawks fans to say, "I got a great parking space, over in those condos!" Those aren't condos: Those are West Side housing projects.

However you go in, you're least likely to enter from the west side (Damen Avenue). More likely, you'll go in from the north (Madison Street), east (Wood Street) or south (Monroe Street) side. The rink is laid out east-to-west. The Blackhawks attack twice toward the west end.

The United Center has hosted both the Blackhawks and the Bulls since the 1994-95 season, although, due to the 1994 NHL strike, it was January 1995 before the Hawks actually took their new ice for the 1st time. It is 1 of 11 arenas currently home to both an NBA team and an NHL team.

Each team has now won 6 World Championships, and each has won 3 since it moved in. The Bulls clinched at home in 1996 and 1997, the Blackhakws in 2015. At Chicago Stadium, the Blackhawks clinched at home in 1934 and 1938, the Bulls in 1992. The city's 1st NBA team, the Chicago Stags, played there from 1946 to 1950, and reached the 1st NBA Finals there in 1947.

The United Center has become Chicago's top venue for concerts and professional wrestling, and it hosted the 1996 Democratic Convention, at which President Bill Clinton was nominated for a 2nd term. The Democrats had their Convention at Chicago Stadium in 1932, '40 and '44, nominating Franklin D. Roosevelt each time; the Republicans also had their Convention there in '32 (renominating Hebert Hoover) and '44 (nominating Thomas E. Dewey).

Chicago Stadium hosted 4 fights for the Heavyweight Championship of the World: Joe Louis defending the title by knocking out Harry Thomas on April 4, 1938; Ezzard Charles defending the title by defeating Light Heavyweight Champion Joey Maxim on May 30, 1951; Rocky Marciano defending the title he'd won from Jersey Joe Walcott the year before by knocking Walcott out in the 1st round on May 15, 1953; and Light Heavyweight Champion Archie Moore, the last man Marciano beat before his retirement vacated the title, facing Olympic champion Floyd Patterson, with Patterson winning, on November 30, 1956.

Elvis Presley gave concerts at Chicago Stadium on June 16 and 17, 1972; October 14 and 15, 1976; and May 1 and 2, 1977 -- meaning he was singing while burglars were breaking into the Watergate complex in Washington, and while Chris Chambliss as hitting a Pennant-winning home run for the Yankees.

The United Center will host the NCAA Frozen Four this season, and hosts the annual Champions Classic, a college basketball season-opening tournament.
Food. As one of America's greatest food cities, in Big Ten Country where tailgate parties are practically a sacrament, you would expect the Chicago sports venues to have lots of good options. The United Center lives up to this obligation.

The north side of the arena has DiGiorno pizza, a Captain Morgan/Don Julio cocktail bar, Madison Street Eats and a Ketel One cocktail bar. The east side has Chicago Dish pizza, Chicago Burger, and a Goose Island cocktail bar. The south side has Monroe Street Eats and a Smirnoff/Crown Royal cocktail bar. The west side has Leghorn Chicken, a Crown Royal Whiskey Bar and a Sweet Baby Rays barbecue stand. That's just on the 100 Level. The 300 Level has fewer theme stands, but quite a few of them, including Breakaway (in keeping with the hockey theme) and Fast Break (the basketball theme).

Team History Displays. The Blackhawks' banners are at the east, Wood Street, side of the building. The Blackhawks' banners are at the west, Damen Avenue, side.
Chicago Stadium in its Blackhawks setup

The Blackhawks have banners for their 6 Stanley Cups: 1934, 1938, 1961, 2010, 2013 and 2015. (Their 49-year drought seemed impossible to break, but for today's kids, it seems impossible to imagine.) They have 16 banners for Division titles (from 1970 to 2017), 2 banners for President's Trophies (1991 and 2013), and 4 banners for Conference Championships (1992, 2010, 2013 and 2015). They do not have banners for pre-1992 seasons in which they reached the Stanley Cup Finals (1931, 1944, 1962, 1965, 1971 and 1973), unless they also won the Division in those years.
Image result for Chicago Blackhawks Stanley Cup banners"
The Blackhawks have retired 6 numbers for 7 players. On October 19, 1980, the Hawks retired Number 21 for the recently retired center Stan Mikita, a member of their 1961 Cup winners. Due to a feud between left wing Bobby Hull and the team-owning Wirtz family, stemming from Hull's defection to the World Hockey Association in 1972, they hadn't retired Number 9 for "the Golden Jet." Dale Tallon, an All-Star defenseman, was acquired in 1973, and was given 9, and joked, "They forgot the decimal point." (Tallon is now the general manager of the Florida Panthers.) Hull and the Wirtzes patched things up, and his 9 was retired on December 18, 1983.

On November 20, 1988, the Hawks honored their 2 greatest goaltenders, retiring 1 for Glenn Hall (1961 Cup winners) and 35 for Tony Esposito (1971 and 1973 Cup Finalists). When the last regular-season game was played at Chicago Stadium in 1994, each man was given the banner for his number that had hung in the rafters, and was invited back the next season when new banners were raised to the roof at the United Center.
At Chicago Stadium's closing, April 18, 1994

On March 19, 1998, the Hawks retired 18 for center Denis Savard (1992 Cup Finalists). On November 12, 2008, they retired 3 for a pair of defensemen: Keith Magnuson (1971 and 1973 Cup Finalists, killed in a car crash in 2003) and Pierre Pilote (1961 Cup winners, on hand for the ceremony).

The Hawks dedicated statues to Hull and Mikita on the east side of the United Center in 2012. A plaque with the words "Chicago Stadium - 1929–1994 - Remember The Roar" is located behind a statue of the Blackhawks greatest players on the north side of the United Center.
In 2001, a 75th Anniversary Team was named:

* From the 1934 and 1938 Cup winners: Only right wing Harold "Mush" March. Goaltender Charlie Gardiner, and defensemen Lionel Conacher, Art Coulter and Earl Seibert (there in '38 but not in '34), Hall-of-Famers all, were not selected. Neither were should-be-Hall-of-Famers defenseman Taffy Abel and left wings Paul Thompson and Johnny Gottselig. Owner Frederic McLaughlin is also in the Hall.

* From the 1944 Cup Finalists: No one. McLaughlin and Seibert were holdovers. The Bentley brothers, left wing Doug and center Max, played on this team, and were elected to the Hall of Fame. So was right wing Bill Mosienko, famous for his record achievement of scoring 3 goals in 21 seconds in a 1952 game. Defenseman John Mariucci is in the Hall of Fame, but for coaching at the University of Minnesota. Left wing Roy Conacher (Lionel's brother, and also brother of Toronto Hall-of-Famer Charlie) and defenseman Bill Gadsby played for the Hawks in the late 1940s and early '50s, and made the Hall of Fame.

* From the 1961 Cup winners: Hull, Hall, Pilote and Mikita. They, owner Art Wirtz, head coach Rudy Pilous, head coach Tommy Ivan, and defenseman Al Arbour were elected to the Hall. It should be noted that, while Arbour was an All-Star, he was elected for what he did as Islanders coach.

* From the 1971 and 1973 Finalists, but not the '61 Cup winners: Esposito, Magnuson, and left wing Dennis Hull, Bobby's brother, a.k.a. the Silver Jet. Esposito is in the Hall of Fame.

* From between the 1973 and 1992 Finalists: Savard; Defensemen Doug Wilson, Pat Stapleton and Bill White; and left wing Al Secord. Savard and 1980s head coach Bob Pulford are in the Hall of Fame.

* From the 1992 Finalists: Goaltender Ed Belfour, defenseman Chris Chelios, center Jeremy Roenick, and right wing Steve Larmer. Chelios, Belfour, Dominik Hasek (then Belfour's backup, so not elected for what he did in Chicago), left wing Michel Goulet, and owner Bill Wirtz are in the Hall of Fame.

* Right wing Tony Amonte was with the Hawks at the time of the 2001 vote. Obviously, no one from the 3 recent Cups was selected.

Gardiner, Hull, Hall, Mikita, Esposito, Chelios, 1938 Cup hero Earl Seibert, 1940s star brothers Max and Doug Bentley, and 1950s star Bill Gadsby were named to The Hockey News' 100 Greatest Players in 1998. Max Bentley, Hall, Hull, Mikita, Esposito, Savard, Chelios, and current Blackhawks Jonathan Toews, Patrick Kane and Duncan Keith were named to the NHL's 100th Anniversary 100 Greatest Players in 2017. Stapleton, who also played for the Chicago Cougars of the World Hockey Association, was named to the WHA's All-Time Team.

Gardiner and Conacher were named to the NHL All-Star Team that opposed the host Toronto Maple Leafs in the Ace Bailey Benefit Game in 1934. Gottselig and Marsh were named to the team that opposed a combined Canadiens and Maroons team in the Howie Morenz Memorial Game at the Montreal Forum in 1937. Gottselig and Seibert -- note the difference in the spelling, they were not related -- played for the team that faced the Canadiens in the Babe Siebert Memorial Game at the Forum in 1939.

The Bentley brothers and Bill Mosienko -- best known for his 1952 feat of scoring 3 goals in a span of 21 seconds against the Rangers -- were on the team that faced the defending Champion Leafs in the 1st official NHL All-Star Game in 1947.

Dave Christian and Jack O'Callahan of the 1980 U.S. Olympic team went on to play for the Blackhawks. Esposito, Mikita, Stapleton, White and Dennis Hull were named to the Team Canada that faced the Soviets in the 1972 Summit Series. Bobby was not: It was only open to NHL players, and he had just jumped to the WHA. As a result of not being selected for that Team Canada, Canada's Walk of Fame is an honor that Dennis -- as well as Mikita, Stapleton, White, Esposito and his brother Phil Esposito, a Blackhawk at the beginning of his career -- has received, but Bobby hasn't.

Hull, Mikita, Pulford, Ivan, Mariucci, and former owners James D. Norris, and Art and Bill Wirtz all received the Lester Patrick Trophy, for contributions to hockey in America. Lloyd Pettit and Pat Foley have received the Foster Hewitt Memorial Award, considered election to the Hockey Hall of Fame for broadcasters.

Historically, the Hawks' biggest rivals are the Detroit Red Wings. These 2 teams have been trying to beat each other's brains out since they were both founded in 1926. The Wings have won 406 games, the Hawks 328, with 84 ties. They've faced each other in the Playoffs 16 times, although with the recent NHL realignment, another matchup is only possible in the Stanley Cup Finals. The Hawks have won 9 of these series, the Wings 7. The Hawks beat the Wings in the Finals in 1934 and 1961.

Geographically, the Hawks' other big rivals are the St. Louis Blues. This time, the Hawks lead, 187 to 158, with 35 ties. There have been 12 Playoff meetings, with the Hawks winning 8.

Stuff. The Blackhawks Store and the Bull Market -- 2 sides of a large store -- are on the lower level of the arena's west end. They may sell Indian headdresses and foam tomahawks, in keeping with the "Blackhawk" image.

Chicago is a great literary city, and while the Cubs have been seen as the city's most romantic sports, there have been some good books about the Blackhawks. George Vass wrote The Chicago Black Hawks Story in 1970. (Until 1986, when the team's original charter was found, and the name of it was found to be written as one word, "Blackhawks," it was usually written as two words, "Black Hawks." This made sense, as the team was named after Chief Black Hawk, the early 19th Century leader of Native American tribes in the Midwest.)

Chicago Tribune columnist Bob Verdi and former head coach Billy Reay collaborated on Chicago Blackhawks: Seventy-Five Years in 2000 (a little early). Lew Freedman recently published Chicago's Big Teams: Great Moments of the Cubs, Bears, White Sox, Blackhawks and Bulls.

DVD packages are available for the 2010, 2013 and 2015 Cup wins.

During the Game. A November 19, 2014 article on The Hockey News' website ranked the NHL teams' fan bases, and listed the Blackhawks' fans as 2nd, behind those of the Toronto Maple Leafs: "Hawks fans are boisterous and publicly supportive. Spoiled with wins, though."

Nevertheless, they still came out 20,000 strong during that long stretch from their Conference Finals berth of 1995 until 2007, when longtime cheapskate owner William Wadsworth "Bill" Wirtz died and his son William Rockwell "Rocky" Wirtz took over and rebuilt the team. This was a time when the Hawks were barely even relevant: Only the low level of support for soccer and thus for the Chicago Fire, and for women's basketball and thus for the Chicago Sky, kept them from being the 5th team in a 5-team town; instead, they were 5th out of 7, behind the Bears, Cubs, Bulls and White Sox.

The United Center is on the West Side, but the well-policed parking lots should buffer you from neighborhood crime. Chicago fans can get a bit rough, and they do like to drink. However, if you don't antagonize them, they will probably give you no worse than a bit of verbal.

This Monday night's game against the Devils will not feature a promotion. Wayne Messmer, former Cubs public address announcer, used to sing the National Anthem for both the Cubs and the Blackhawks. But when he became part-owner of the minor-league Chicago Wolves, the Hawks dropped him. Jim Cornelison has sung the Anthem for both the Blackhawks and the Bulls since 2008.
The Blackhawks' mascot is Tommy Hawk (as opposed to "tomahawk"), a black hawk wearing the 4 feathers shown on the team's logo, in colors red, green, yellow and orange. He has been elected to the Mascot Hall of Fame.
The main chant for Blackhawks fans is "Let's go, Hawks!" -- definitely not, "Let's go, Blackhawks! (Clap, clap, clap-clap-clap)," because, to a Chicagoan, it sounds too much like, "Let's go, Red Wings!" Wings vs. Colorado Avalanche was never a real rivalry: Wings vs. Hawks has been going on since 1926. However, unlike us, and Islanders fans, with our "Rangers suck!" chant (and our addition of "Flyers swallow!"), they only use "Dee-troit sucks!" when they're playing the Wings. Otherwise, they put that chant away.

The goal song is "Chelsea Dagger" by The Fratellis: "Dip-diddle-ip-diddle-ip... " And their victory song is the Notorious B.I.G.'s "Old Thing Back." A little touch of our Tri-State Area on Chicago's West Side.

After the Game. The neighborhood should be safe after a day game, but after a night game, with all that extra time to drink, it can get a little dodgy. As I said, leave them alone, and they'll probably leave you alone.

As I said, the parking lots are a buffer zone against the dodgy neighborhood, but also put distance between the arena and any bars or restaurants worth going to: None are in the vicinity.

If you want to be around other New Yorkers and New Jerseyans, I found listings of 4 Chicago bars where New York Giants fans gather: Red Ivy, just south of Wrigley Field at 3519 N. Clark Street at Eddy Street; The Bad Dog Tavern, 4535 N. Lincoln Avenue at Wilson Avenue (Brown Line to Western); Racine Plumbing Bar and Grill, 2642 N. Lincoln Avenue at Kenmore; and Trinity, at 2721 N. Halsted Street at Diversey Parkway (Brown or Purple Line to Diversey for either Racine or Trinity). Racine Plumbing is also listed as the local bar for Mets and Notre Dame fans.

And I found these 3 which show Jets games: Rebel Bar & Grill, also just south of Wrigley, at 3462 N. Clark at Cornelia Avenue; Wabash Tap, 1233 S. Wabash Avenue (Red Line to Roosevelt); and Butch McGuire's, 20 W. Division Street at Dearborn Street (Red Line to Clark/Division).

Note that, with the exception of Wabash Tap, all of these are a lot closer to Wrigley than to the United Center. But there are plenty of good places in the city to get a postgame meal, or just a pint.

If your visit to Chicago is during the European soccer season (which were are now in), the best place to watch your favorite club is at The Globe Pub, 1934 W. Irving Park Rd., about 6 miles northwest of The Loop. Brown Line to Irving Park.

Sidelights. Chicago is one of the best sports cities, not just in America, but on the planet. Check out the following – but do it in daylight, as the city's reputation for crime, while significantly reduced from its 1980s peak, is still there.

On November 30, 2018, Thrillist published a list of "America's 25 Most Fun Cities," and, as you might expect from America's 3rd-largest city, Chicago came in 3rd.

* Wrigley Field. Built in 1914 for the Chicago Whales of the Federal League, and home of the Cubs since 1916, it is by far the oldest ballpark in the National League, and only Fenway Park in Boston is older among North American major league sports venues.

The Cubs have never won the World Series here, but won 6 Pennants between 1918 and 1945 -- and none since. They've made the Playoffs 7 times in the last 32 seasons (including this year), which is better than some teams have done over that stretch -- but no Pennants. The Bears played here from 1921 to 1970, and won 8 NFL Championships between 1921 and 1963. It hosted the NHL Winter Classic in 2009, with the Hawks losing to the Wings. Wrigley (still known as Cubs Park) was also home of the Chicago Tigers, who played in the NFL only in its 1st season, 1920.

If you go, don't watch a game from one of the rooftops on Waveland (left field) or Sheffield (right field) Avenues. What's the point of watching a game at Wrigley Field if you're not in Wrigley Field? 1060 W. Addison Street at Clark Street. Red Line to Addison.

* Guaranteed Rate Field. Home of the White Sox since 1991, and originally named the new Comiskey Park and later U.S. Cellular Field, they've made the Playoffs 4 times since, including winning the 2005 World Series. 333 W. 35th Street at Shields Avenue (a.k.a. Bill Veeck Drive), off the Dan Ryan Expressway. Red Line to Sox-35th.

* Site of old Comiskey Park. The longtime home of the White Sox, 1910 to 1990, was across the street from the new one, at 324 W. 35th Street, is now a parking lot, with its infield painted in. This was the home field of Big Ed Walsh (the pitcher supposedly helped design it to be a pitchers' park), Eddie Collins, Shoeless Joe Jackson and the rest of the "Black Sox," Luke Appling, the great double-play combination of Luis Aparicio and Nellie Fox of the '59 "Go-Go White Sox," Dick Allen, the 1977 "South Side Hit Men" of Richie Zisk and Oscar Gamble, and the 1983 Division Champions of Carlton Fisk, Ron Kittle, LaMarr Hoyt and Harold Baines.

The old Comiskey was also where future Yankee stars Russell "Bucky" Dent and Rich "Goose" Gossage began their careers, and where, in the last game the Yankees ever played there, Andy Hawkins pitched a no-hitter – and lost, thanks to his own walks and 3 errors in the 8th inning.

The NFL's Chicago Cardinals played there from 1922 to 1959, and the franchise, now the Arizona Cardinals, won what remains their only NFL Championship Game (they didn't call 'em Super Bowls back then) there in 1947. The Chicago Sting of the old North American Soccer League played there from 1980 to 1982, won the league title in 1981 and 1984, and hosted the 1st leg of Soccer Bowl '84.

Comiskey Park hosted 3 fights for the Heavyweight Championship of the World: Joe Louis winning the title by knocking out "Cinderella Man" Jim Braddock on June 22, 1937; Ezzard Charles defeating Jersey Joe Walcott for the title vacated by Louis' retirement on June 22, 1949; and Sonny Liston knocking out Floyd Patterson to take the title on September 25, 1962.

* Previous Chicago ballparks. The Cubs previously played at these parks:

State Street Grounds, also called 23rd Street Grounds, 1874-77, winning the NL's 1st Pennant in 1876, 23rd, State, and Federal Streets & Cermak Road (formerly 22nd Street), Red Line to Cermak-Chinatown.

Lakefront Park, also called Union Base-Ball Grounds and White-Stocking Park (the Cubs used the name "Chicago White Stockings" until 1900, and the AL entry then took the name), 1878-84, winning the 1880, 1881 and 1882 Pennants, Michigan Avenue & Randolph Street in the northwest corner of what's now Millennium Park, with (appropriately) Wrigley Square built on the precise site. Randolph/Wabash or Madison/Wabash stops on the Loop.

West Side Park I, 1885-91, winning the 1885 and 1886 Pennants, at Congress, Loomis, Harrison & Throop Streets, now part of the campus of the University of Illinois at Chicago (UIC), Blue Line to Racine.

South Side Park, 1891-93, just east of where the Comiskey Parks were built.

West Side Park II, 1893-1915, winning the 1906 and 1910 Pennants and the 1907 and 1908 World Series, the only World Series the Cubs have ever won, at Taylor, Wood and Polk Streets and Wolcott Avenue, now the site of a medical campus that includes the Cook County Hospital, the basis for the TV show ER, Pink Line to Polk.  (Yes, the CTA has a Pink Line.)

Prior to the original Comiskey Park, the White Sox played at a different building called South Side Park, at 39th Street (now Pershing Road), 38th Street, & Wentworth and Princeton Avenues, a few blocks south of the Comiskey Parks.

* Soldier Field. The original version of this legendary stadium opened in 1924, and for years was best known as the site of the Chicago College All-Star Game (a team of graduating seniors playing the defending NFL Champions) from 1934 to 1976.

It was the site of the 1927 heavyweight title fight between Jack Dempsey and Gene Tunney, the famed "Long Count" fight, which may have had what remains the greatest attendance ever for a U.S. sporting event, with figures ranging from 104,000 to 130,000, depending on who you believe. It definitely was the site of the largest football crowd ever, 123,000 to see Notre Dame play USC a few weeks after the Long Count; that record stood until a 2016 Tennessee-Virginia game was staged at Bristol Motor Speedway in front of 156,990. The 1926 Army-Navy Game was played there, in front of over 100,000.

The Chicago Rockets of the All-America Football Conference played at Soldier Field in 1946, '47 and '48, changing their name to the Chicago Hornets in '49. They were not admitted into the NFL with their AAFC brethren in Cleveland, San Francisco and Baltimore.

Games of the 1994 World Cup and the 1999 Women's World Cup, were also held at the old Soldier Field. MLS' Chicago Fire made it their 1st home ground, winning the MLS Cup in 1998, and will return to it for the 2020 season.

There have been 14 matches of the U.S. soccer team played on the site, most recently a 2016 win over Costa Rica. The U.S. has won 7 of these games, lost 4 and tied 3. An NHL Stadium Series game was played there earlier this year, with the Blackhawks beating the Pittsburgh Penguins 5-1.

Amazingly, the Bears played at Wrigley from 1921 to 1970, with the occasional single-game exception. The story I heard is that Bears founder-owner-coach George Halas was a good friend of both the Wrigley and Veeck families, and felt loyalty to them, and that's why he stayed at Wrigley even though it had just 47,000 seats for football.

But I heard another story that Halas was a Republican and didn't like Chicago's Democratic Mayor, Richard J. Daley (whose son Richard M. recently left office having broken his father's record for longest-serving Mayor), and didn't want to pay the city Parks Department a lot of rent. (This is believable, because Halas was known to be cheap: Mike Ditka, who nonetheless loved his old boss, said, "Halas throws nickels around like manhole covers.") The real reason the Bears moved to Soldier Field in 1971 was Monday Night Football: Halas wanted the revenue, and Wrigley didn't have lights until 1988.

A 2002-03 renovation demolished all but the iconic (but not Ionic, they're in the Doric style) Greek-style columns that used to hang over the stadium, and are now visible only from the outside. It doesn't look like "Soldier Field" anymore: One critic called it The Eyesore on the Lake Shore.

Capacity is now roughly what it was in the last few years prior to the renovation, 61,500. And while the Bears won 8 Championships while playing at Wrigley, they've only won one more at Soldier Field, the 1985 title capped by Super Bowl XX. The Monsters of the Midway have been tremendous underachievers since leaving Wrigley, having been to only 1 of the last 28 Super Bowls (and losing it).

1410 S. Museum Campus Drive, at McFetridge and Lake Shore Drives, a bit of a walk from the closest station, Roosevelt station on the Green, Orange and Red Lines.

* Site of Chicago Coliseum. There were 2 buildings with this name that you should know about. One hosted the 1896 Democratic National Convention, where William Jennings Bryan began the process of turning the Democratic Party from the conservative party it had been since before the Civil War into the modern liberal party it became, a struggle that went through the Woodrow Wilson and Franklin Roosevelt years before it finally lived up to its promise under John F. Kennedy and Lyndon Johnson.

It was here that Bryan gave the speech for which he is most remembered, calling for the free coinage of silver rather than sticking solely to the gold standard: "You shall not press down upon the brow of labor this crown of thorns. You shall not crucify mankind upon a cross of gold."

Now a part of Jackson Park, at 63rd Street & Stony Island Avenue. 63rd Street Metra (commuter rail) station.

The other was home to every Republican Convention from 1904 to 1920. Here, they nominated Theodore Roosevelt in 1904, William Howard Taft in 1908 and 1912, Charles Evans Hughes in 1916 and Warren Harding in 1920. When TR was maneuvered out of the nomination to return to office at the 1912 Convention, he held his subsequent Progressive Party Convention was also held there.

It was also the original home of the Blackhawks, from 1926 to 1929 and briefly again in 1932. In 1935, roller derby was invented there. In 1961, an NBA expansion team, the Chicago Packers, played there, becoming the Zephyrs in 1962 and moving to become the Baltimore Bullets in 1963 (and the Washington Bullets in 1973, and the Washington Wizards in 1997).
The Coliseum hosted a few rock concerts before the Fire Department shut it down in 1971, and it was demolished in 1982. The Soka Gakkai USA Culture Center, a Buddhist institute, now occupies the site. East side of Wabash Avenue at 15th Street, with today's Coliseum Park across the street. Appropriately enough, the nearest CTA stop is at Roosevelt Avenue, on the Red, Yellow and Green Lines.

* Site of International Amphitheatre. Home to the Bulls in their first season, 1966-67, and to the World Hockey Association's Chicago Cougars from 1972 to 1975, this arena, built by the stockyards in 1934, was home to a lot of big pro wrestling cards. Elvis sang here on March 28, 1957. The Beatles played here on September 5, 1964 and August 12, 1966.

But it was best known as a site for political conventions. Both parties met there in 1952 (the Republicans nominating Dwight D. Eisenhower, the Democrats nominating their host, Governor Adlai Stevenson of Illinois), the Democrats in 1956 (Stevenson again), the Republicans in 1960 (Richard Nixon), and, most infamously, the Democrats in 1968 (Hubert Humphrey), with all the protests. The main protests for that convention were in Grant Park and a few blocks away on Michigan Avenue in front of the Conrad Hilton Hotel, one of the convention headquarters (now the Chicago Hilton & Towers. 720 S. Michigan).

The Amphitheatre, torn down in 1999, was at 4220 S. Halsted Street, where an Aramark plant now stands. Red Line to 47th Street. This location is definitely not to be visited after dark; indeed, unless you're really interested in political history, I'd say, if you have to drop one item from this list, this is the one.

Elvis also sang in Illinois at Assembly Hall at the University of Illinois in Champaign on October 22, 1976, and at Southern Illinois University Arena in Carbondale on October 27.

* Northwestern University. Chicago's Big Ten school is just north of the city, 16 miles from the Loop, in Evanston. Dyche Stadium/Ryan Field, and McGaw Hall/Welsh-Ryan Arena, are at 2705 Ashland Avenue between Central Street and Isabella Street. (Purple Line to Central.)

While Northwestern's athletic teams have traditionally been terrible, the school has a very important place in sports history: The 1st NCAA basketball tournament championship game was held there in 1939, at Patten Gymnasium, at 2145 Sheridan Road: Oregon defeated Ohio State. The original Patten Gym was torn down a year later -- don't be too hard on them, no one had any idea how important this historical distinction would become -- and the school's Technological Institute was built on the site. Sheridan Road, Noyes Street and Campus Drive. Purple Line to Noyes.

Welsh-Ryan, under the McGaw name, hosted the Final Four in 1956: Bill Russell and K.C. Jones, soon to be Boston Celtics stars, led the University of San Francisco past Iowa. These are the only 2 Final Fours ever to be held in the Chicago area.

The University of Illinois is in Champaign, 137 miles south on Interstate 57.

* SeatGreek Stadium. MLS' Chicago Fire played here, a stadium until recently named Toyota Park, from 2006 to 2019. The NWSL's Chicago Red Stars have played here since 2016. The U.S. soccer team has played here once, a 2008 win over Trinidad & Tobago. 7000 S. Harlem Avenue, Bridgeview, in the southwestern suburbs. Orange Line to Midway Airport, then transfer to the 379 or 390 bus.

* Allstate Arena. Known from its 1980 opening until 1999 as the Rosemont Horizon, this 17,500-seat area was built as a modern (for the time) suburban alternative to the ghetto-ridden Chicago Stadium. It became Chicagoland's premier site for NCAA Tournament basketball, rock concerts, "professional wrestling" and the Ringling Brothers Barnum & Bailey Circus.

Mostly, it's known as the home court for DePaul University basketball, and the playing surface is named the Ray and Marge Meyer Court for the coaching legend and his wife. It's also been home to the WNBA's Chicago Sky (2010-17), minor-league hockey's Chicago Wolves, and Arena Football's Chicago Rush, winners of the 2006 ArenaBowl and hosts of the game in 1988. (The Rush, named for the city's Rush Street nightclub district, suspended operations in 2013, and are currently listed as dormant rather than folded.)

6920 N. Mannheim Road at Lunt Avenue, 18 miles northwest of the Loop, across I-90 from O'Hare Airport. Possible to reach by public transportation, but not really worth it: If you're pressed for time, and need to cross some items off your list, this should be one of them.

* DePaul University. Led by legendary coach Ray Meyer, and then his son Joey Meyer, the basketball team at this "mid-major" Catholic school has featured eventual pro stars George Mikan, Bill Robinzine, Mark Aguirre, Terry Cummings, Dallas Comegys, Quentin Richardson and Rod Strickland.

The Blue Demons' longtime home court was Alumni Hall, until 1979. It was demolished in 2000, and DePaul's new student center was built on the site. 1011 W. Belden Avenue. Red Line to Fullerton. Starting in 1980, they moved out to the aforementioned Allstate Arena.

In a few days, they'll move into the new Wintrust Arena, at the McCormick Place Convention Center. The WNBA's Chicago Sky will follow them next Summer. 2201 S. Indiana Avenue, at Cermak Road. Green Line to Cermak-McCormick Place.

* UIC Pavilion. On the campus of the University of Illinois at Chicago, this 6,972-seat arena opened in 1982. It was the 1st home of the Chicago Sky, from 2006 to 2009. 525 S. Racine Avenue, on the West Side. Blue Line to Racine.

* Arlington Park. Now officially named Arlington International Racecourse, this track, with a 41,000-seat grandstand, has been the Chicago area's leading horse racing facility since it opened in 1927. Jimmy Jones, the Hall of Fame trainer of 1948 Triple Crown winner Citation, and late 1950s Kentucky Derby winners Iron Liege and Tim Tam, said, "Arlington Park became the finest track in the world, certainly the finest I've ever been on."

In the spirit of Chicago's tendency toward innovation, Arlington Park was the 1st track to install a public address system, hiring horse racing's top radio announcer of the time, Clem McCarthy, to speak over it. It added the sport's 1st electronic tote board and clock in 1933, the 1st photo finish camera in 1936, and the 1st electric starting gate in 1940. One of the earliest televised major horse races was held there in 1955, with Preakness Stakes and Belmont Stakes winner Nashua defeating Kentucky Derby winner Swaps.

In 1973, hoping to lure Triple Crown winner Secretariat to the Midwest, the track's owners created the Arlington Invitational. It worked: Secretariat's owner, Penny Chenery, accepted the challenge, and Secretariat won the race. The race was renamed the Secretariat Stakes the following year, and is still run.

On August 31, 1981, it hosted the 1st thoroughbred race with a $1 million payout, the Arlington Million. That may not sound like a big deal today, but in 1981, when horse racing was a lot bigger than it is now, and an athlete earning $1 million in a season was a new phenomenon, it was huge. (With inflation, that $1 million would be worth about $2.7 million today.) John Henry was the winner, with Bill Shoemaker aboard.

A fire burned down the original 1927 grandstand in 1985, and the track reopened in 1989. In the interim, its meets were moved to Hawthorne Race Course in Stickney, home of the Illinois Derby. It shut down again from 1998 to 2000, for a renovation  that allowed it to host the 2002 Breeders' Cup.

2200 W. Euclid Avenue in Arlington Heights, 25 miles northwest of the Loop. METRA commuter rail from Ogilive Transportation Center (formerly Northwestern Station) to Arlington Park.

* National Italian-American Sports Hall of Fame. Appropriately in Chicago's Little Italy, west of downtown, it includes a state uf Yankee legend Joe DiMaggio.  Other New York native or playing baseball players honored include Joe Torre, Yogi Berra, Phil Rizzuto, Billy Martin, Vic Raschi, Tony Lazzeri, Dave Righetti, Frank Crosetti, Roy Campanella, Sal Maglie, Mike Piazza, Bobby Valentine, John Franco, Carl Furillo, Frank Viola, Jim Fregosi, Ralph Branca, Rocky Colavito, broadcaster Joe Garagiola, and the last active player to have been a Brooklyn Dodger, Bob Aspromonte, and his brother Ken Aspromonte. 1431 W. Taylor Street at Loomis Street.  Pink Line to Polk.

* Museums. Chicago's got a bunch of good ones, as you would expect in a city of 3 million people. Their version of New York's Museum of Natural History is the Field Museum, just north of Soldier Field. Adjacent is the Shedd Aquarium. On the other side of the Aquarium is their answer to the Hayden Planetarium, the Adler Planetarium.

They have a fantastic museum for which there is no real analogue in New York, though the Franklin Institute in Philadelphia is similar: The Museum of Science & Industry, at 57th Street & Cornell Drive, near the University of Chicago campus; 56th Street Metra station. The Art Institute of Chicago is their version of the Metropolitan Museum of Art, at 111 S. Michigan Avenue, just off the Loop.

Ferris Bueller's Day Off. If you're a fan of that movie, as I am (see my 25th Anniversary retrospective, from June 2011), not only will you have taken in Wrigley Field, but you'll recognize the Art Institute as where Alan Ruck focused on Georges Seurat's painting A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte.

Other sites visited by Ferris, Cameron and Sloane were the Sears Tower, then the tallest building in the world, 1,454 feet, 233 S. Wacker Drive (yes, the name is Wacker), Quincy/Wells station in the Loop; and the Chicago Mercantile Exchange, 335 S. La Salle Street, LaSalle/Van Buren station in the Loop. (That station is also where Steve Martin & John Candy finally reached Chicago in another John Hughes film, Planes, Trains and Automobiles). The von Steuben Day Parade goes down Lincoln Avenue every September, on or close to the anniversary of Baron von Steuben's birth, not in the spring as in the film.

While the Bueller house was in Long Beach, California, the Frye house is in Highland Park, north of the city. Remember, it's a private residence, and not open to the public, so I won't provide the address. And the restaurant, Chez Quis, did not and does not exist.

Nor did, nor does, Adam's Ribs, a barbecue joint made famous in a 1974 M*A*S*H episode of the same title. Today, there are 18 restaurants in America named Adam's Ribs, including two on Long Island, on Park Boulevard in Massapequa Park and on the Montauk Highway in Babylon; and another on Cookstown-Wrightstown Road outside South Jersey's Fort Dix and McGuire Air Force Base. But only one is anywhere near Chicago, in Buffalo Grove in the northwestern suburbs.

Not far from that, in the western suburbs, is Wheaton, home town of football legend Red Grange and the comedic Belushi Brothers, John and Jim. John and Dan Aykroyd used Wrigley Field in The Blues Brothers, and Jim played an obsessive Cubs fan in Taking Care of Business. Their father, an Albanian immigrant, ran a restaurant called The Olympia Cafe, which became half the basis for John's Saturday Night Live sketch of the same name, better known as the Cheeseburger Sketch: "No hamburger! Cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger... No fries, chips!... No Coke, Pepsi!"

Don Novello, an SNL writer who played Father Guido Sarducci, said the other half of the inspiration was the Billy Goat Tavern, originally operated by Greek immigrant William "Billy Goat" Sianis, originator of the supposed Billy Goat Curse on the Cubs, across Madison Street from Chicago Stadium, from 1937 until 1963. At that point, Sianis moved to the lower deck of the double-decked Michigan Avenue, since it was near the headquarters of the city's 3 daily newspapers, the Tribune, the Sun-Times, and the now-defunct Daily News. Mike Royko, who wrote columns for each of these papers, made it his haunt and frequently mentioned it in his columns.

Novello and Bill Murray, Chicagoans, were regulars at the Billy Goat, but John Belushi later said he'd never set foot in the place, so while the others may have drawn inspiration from it, his came from his father's restaurant.

Sam Sianis, nephew of the original Billy, still serves up a fantastic cheeseburger (he was there when I visited in 1999), he deviates from the sketch: No Pepsi, Coke. It's open for breakfast, and serves regular breakfast food. It looks foreboding, being underneath the elevated part of Michigan Avenue, and a sign out front (and on their website) says, "Enter at your own risk." But another sign says, "Butt in anytime." 430 N. Michigan Avenue, lower deck, across from the Tribune Tower. Red Line to Grand. The original location near Chicago Stadium has effectively been replaced, at 1535 W. Madison Street.

The Tribune Tower is a work of art in itself. Its building, Tribune publisher "Colonel" Robert R. McCormick, had stones taken from various famous structures all over the world: The Palace of Westminster in London, the Western Wall in Jerusalem, the Taj Mahal, the Great Wall of China, the Grand Canyon.  (He must've paid a lot of people off.) These can be seen at near ground level, but the building itself is so grand that it doesn't need it.

The building is also the headquarters of the TV and radio station that McCormick named for his paper: WGN, "The World's Greatest Newspaper," a line that has long since disappeared from the paper's masthead. 435 N. Michigan Avenue. Red Line to Grand.

The Wrigley Building is right across from it, at 400 N. Michigan. The block of North Michigan they're on is renamed Jack Brickhouse Way, and Brickhouse's statue is on the grounds of the Tribune Tower.

* Quad Cities. Rock Island and Moline, Illinois, and Davenport and Bettendorf, Iowa, are, together, known as the Quad Cities. Together, these cities and adjoining smaller towns have a population of about 475,000. (Davenport about 100,000, Moline 44,000, Rock Island 39,000 and Bettendorf 35,000). Not big enough to be major league -- but some people tried.

The 5,000-seat Douglas Park was the home of the Rock Island Independents from 1907 to 1925, including 1920 to 1925 in the NFL. In fact, it was the site of the 1st NFL game, on October 3, 1920, a 45-0 Indys win over the Indiana-based Muncie Flyers. It was also home to a minor-league baseball team, the Rock Island Islanders, from 1907 to 1937, winning Class D Pennants in 1907, 1909 and 1932. West side of 10th Street between 15th and 18th Avenues in Rock Island, 180 miles west of Chicago.

One of the oldest surviving pro basketball teams is the Atlanta Hawks. They began as the Tri-Cities Blackhawks (they dropped Bettendorf from the "Quad Cities" description) in 1946. They weren't very good, and moved to Milwaukee in 1951, St. Louis in 1955, and Atlanta in 1968. They played at the 6,000-seat Wharton Field House, which opened in 1928 and still stands. 1800 20th Avenue.

There is a minor-league baseball team in the Quad Cities, but it's been known by various names since its inception in 1879 as the Davenport Brown Stockings. They've won 10 Pennants, previously in Class B, and in what's now Class A: In 1914, 1933 and 1936 as the Davenport Blue Sox; in 1949 as the Davenport Pirates; in 1968 and 1971 as the Quad City Angels; In 1979 as the Quad City Cubs; in 1990 again as the Quad City Angels; and in 2011 and 2013 under their current name, the Quad Cities River Bandits.

Since 1931, they have played at a stadium right on the Mississippi River, which proved a problem during the 1993 flood. The 4,024-seat ballpark was known as Municipal Stadium until 1971, then as John O'Donnell Stadium until 2008, when it became Modern Woodmen Park, as the fraternal organization bought naming rights. 209 S. Gaines Street in Davenport.

No President has ever come from Chicago, and none has a Presidential Library anywhere near it -- yet. Barack Obama has spent his adult life in Chicago, as a lawyer, law professor, and, famously "community organizer," before being elected to the Illinois State Senate, the U.S. Senate, and the Presidency in 2008 and 2012. Since he taught at the University of Chicago, his Library is being built there, at 6201 S. Stony Island Avenue. 63rd Street Station on the South Shore commuter line. It is scheduled to open in 2021.

Abraham Lincoln's Presidential Library is 200 miles away, in the State capital of Springfield. Many other Presidents have Chicago connections. Most notably, the 1st true Presidential Debate, between John F. Kennedy and Richard Nixon, was held on September 26, 1960, at the old CBS Studio, home to WBBM, 780 on your AM dial and Channel 2 on your TV. 630 N. McClurg Street. The building is no longer there. Red Line to Grand, then an 8-minute walk.

In the early days of American politics, any temporary meeting structure was called a "Wigwam," which is a Native American word for a temporary dwelling. Chicago's 1st Wigwam was at what is now 191 N. Upper Wacker Drive, right where the Chicago River splits into north and south branches. Abraham Lincoln was nominated there at their 1860 Convention. A modern office building is on the site today. Clark/Lake station in the Loop.

Another Wigwam stood at 205 East Randolph Street, in what was then called Lake Park, now Grant Park. The Democrats held their Convention there in 1892, nominating Grover Cleveland for the 3rd time. The Harris Theater is on the site today. Randolph/Wabash station in the Loop.

In 1864, the Democrats nominated General George B. McClellan at The Amphitheatre, 1100 South Michigan Avenue. A Best Western Hotel is on the site today. Red Line to Roosevelt. In 1868, the Republicans nominated Ulysses S. Grant at Crosby's Opera House, 1 West Washington Street. A modern office building is on the site today. Blue Line to Washington.

The Interstate Industrial Exposition Building, a.k.a. the Glass Palace, was where the Republicans met and nominated James Garfield in 1880, and both parties met in 1884, the Republicans nominating James G. Blaine and the Democrats nominating Cleveland for the 1st time. 111 South Michigan Avenue. The aforementioned Art Institute of Chicago is on the site today. Adams/Wabash station in the Loop. And in 1888, the Republicans met at the Auditorium Building, 430 South Michigan Avenue. It still stands. Harold Washington Library station, a.k.a. State-Van Buren station, in the Loop.

The old Cook County Courthouse, where the Black Sox trial took place in 1921 (and where a boy allegedly called out to Shoeless Joe Jackson, "Say it ain't so, Joe!" which may actually have happened) was at 1340 South Michigan Avenue, corner of 14th Street. The building has been replaced by an office building, with an Italian restaurant named Giordano's on the ground floor. Green, Orange or Red Line to Roosevelt.

You may notice some other film landmarks. The Chicago Board of Trade Building was used as the Wayne Tower in Christopher Nolan's Batman films. And Chicago stood in for Metropolis in the Superman-themed TV series Lois & Clark, with the Wrigley Building and the Tribune Tower as standout landmarks.

Chicago seems to lend itself well to TV dramas: Crime, legal and medical. Crime dramas set there include The Untouchables, about Eliot Ness and his Depression-era crimebusters; the 1960s period piece Crime Story, Kolchak: The Night Stalker, Angel Street, Due South and Chicago Code. Legal dramas include Reasonable Doubts, Boss and The Good Wife.

The setting of the cop TV show Hill Street Blues was never explicitly stated onscreen, but there was much to show that it was obviously Chicago: The skyline, the elevated railways and expressways, the lousy weather, and the police cars with "METRO POLICE" on the doors were obviously patterned after Chicago's, saying, "CHICAGO POLICE."

At the start of the 1994-95 TV season, competing hospital shows aired: ER on NBC lasted a whopping 15 seasons, while Chicago Hope on CBS lasted 6; it lost the competition, but was hardly a loser. Oddly, CBS had previously aired a sitcom titled E/R, set in a Chicago hospital, but it only lasted the 1984-85 season. Starting in 2012, NBC began airing shows of producer Dick Wolf's "Chicago Franchise": Chicago Fire, Chicago P.D., Chicago Med (hospital) and Chicago Justice
(prosecutors).

Other shows set in Chicago include Good Times, set in the infamous, now-demolished Cabrini-Green housing project; Punky Brewster; the related sitcoms Perfect Strangers and Family Matters (Great shows? Well, of course, they were, don't be ridiculous!); Married... with Children, Fox's longest-running non-cartoon (though the Bundy family was pretty darn cartoonish); the fantasy series Early Edition; the TV version of Soul Food; Steve Harvey's sitcom The Steve Harvey Show (not to be confused with his current talk show); According to Jim, starring Wheaton, Illinois native Jim Belushi; the inaptly named (it was, after all, a comedy) Andy Richter Controls the UniverseMike & Molly, a sitcom about a cop and his teacher girlfriend; the Disney Channel teen sitcom Shake It Up; Shameless; and, perhaps most classically, The Bob Newhart Show, with Bob as psychiatrist Dr. Bob Hartley.

Roseanne, its recent reboot, and its post-Roseanne "threeboot," The Conners, have been set in Lanford, Illinois, a fictional small town near Chicago, perhaps too working-class to be called a "suburb."

Nearly every one of these shows was actually filmed in Los Angeles, and the exterior shots were also mostly L.A. sites, so don't bother going to look for them. However, a statue of Newhart is at the Navy Pier, near its amusement rides, between Grand Avenue & Illinois Street at the lake.

As far as I can tell, Chicago has never been a setting for a soap opera, but 2 have been set in fictional Illinois locations: As the World Turns in Oakdale, and Another World in Bay City (not to be confused with the city of the same name in Michigan). On The West Wing, White House Chief of Staff Leo McGarry was from Chicago.

*

Every American should visit Chicago. And with the Blackhawks having won 3 of the last 6 Stanley Cups, a visit to the United Center can be an epic experience. Have fun -- but remember, be smart, and don't go out of your way to antagonize anyone.

How to Be a Devils Fan In Ottawa -- 2019-20 Edition

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This Sunday, the New Jersey Devils travel up to Ottawa to play the reborn version of the Senators. These teams played each other in the Stanley Cup Playoffs in 1998 (we lost in the 1st round), 2003 (we beat them at their place in Game 7 of the Conference Finals) and 2007 (a pathetic performance, losing in the Conference Semifinals). The Senators also beat us in the 1st game at the Prudential Center, on October 27, 2007.

Needless to say, while they're not exactly a geographic rival or a perennial Playoff opponent, we don't like them.

Hardly anyone does. While Canadian fans were glad to see another Canadian team enter the NHL for the 1992-93 season, they share a common trait with several countries: Wanting to stick it to their national government, and that includes wanting the teams in the capital city to lose. So if we can beat the Sens, Canadians from Newfoundland to British Columbia will like it.

And, of course, if you can add Ottawa to the list of NHL cities you've been to and seen the Devils win at, you will like it very much.

Before You Go. Ottawa is in Canada -- indeed, it is the nation's capital, hence "Ottawa Senators," just as our federal capital once had the Washington Senators, and various State capitals had minor-league baseball teams named the Trenton Senators, the Albany Senators, etc. Canada may be a country very much like our own, but it is still a separate country.

So, on top of having to bring a valid passport and change your money, you should contact your bank, and let them know that you're going there. If they see credit card charges or ATM withdrawals listed as being in a country other than the U.S., they may get suspicious and think your card has been stolen, and cancel it. So let them know that (barring an actual loss or theft) any such transactions will be legit.

One big difference between being a Yankee Fan going to see your team play in Toronto and being a Devils fan going to see your team play anywhere in Canada is that it's a lot harder to get your money changed. Living in New York City, you can find currency exchanges all over. On the New Jersey side of the Hudson River, it's a lot harder.

If you're flying to Ottawa, you can get it done at Newark Airport. Otherwise, you may have to search for a place. Some malls have them, including Jersey Gardens in Elizabeth, Menlo Park in Edison, and Bridgewater Commons in, well, Bridgewater.

I would advise leaving yourself with at least $50 in bills and $1.00 in change in American money, just in case you have difficulty finding a place to change your money back before you leave. And, while the differences in the countries' paper money will be clear, the differences in the coins will be harder. Make sure you keep your American coins and your Canadian coins separate.

As of Tuesday afternoon, December 24 (5 days before the game), C$1.00 = US 76 cents, and US$1.00 = C$1.31. In other words, the exchange rate currently favors us. But since the exchanges need to make a profit, you might not get much of an advantage over the border.

Since Canada is part of the British Commonwealth, you'll also have to deal with the metric system. In other words, that speed limit you're seeing is 100 kilometers per hour (about 62 MPH). And don't be thrilled at the gasoline prices: That's per "litre," not per gallon. A liter is a little more than a quart, so 1 gallon = 3.785 liters. So, it's much worse up there, despite the fact that Canada is a big oil-producing nation. (Indeed, American imports more oil from Canada than from any other country. Why so much? Taxes. Gotta pay for that great national health service somehow.)

One thing you won't have to do is fiddle with your watch or your phone. Ottawa is in the Eastern Time Zone, and all times there will be the same that they would be here.

At 45' 17" north latitude, the Canadian Tire Centre is not the northernmost arena in the NHL (it's actually the southernmost of the 7 Canadian teams' arenas), but it's considerably north of most arenas you're likely to visit. However, this is early November, so it the Ottawa Citizen newspaper (a broadsheet, and far more responsible in journalism than the tabloid Ottawa Sun) is predicting temperatures in the 30s all day on Sunday, plus snow, and snow and rain for the next day. So bring a Winter jacket.

The Ottawa River forms part of the border between English-speaking Ontario and French-speaking Quebec. That said, the Outaouais (pronounced the same as "Ottawa") region of western Quebec, including the cities of Gatineau and Hull, is among the most Anglophone parts of the Province. And most Quebecois, while they would prefer to converse in French, can do so in English. So while you'll see a lot of things in French, it's not necessary to speak or understand the language.

If you can speak French, and someone wants to speak French with you, go ahead. But trying to impress people with your ability to speak it won't work: If you're wearing Devils gear, they won't treat your ability as anything more than a courtesy; if you're not wearing Devils gear, their first inclination will be to think you're one of them -- unless they consider your accent to be strange.

Tickets. Canadians love their hockey. But the Senators averaged 14,553 fans last season, about 76 percent of capacity. This will make getting tickets easier than for any of the other NHL teams in Canada.

Note that these prices are in Canadian dollars, since they come from the club website. 100 level seats are $171 between the goals and $106 behind them, 200 level seats are $141 and $81, 300 level seats are $71 and $35.

Getting There. It's 442 miles from Times Square in New York to Parliament Hill in Ottawa (61 miles from the nearest border crossing, in Ogdensburg, New York), and 428 miles from the Prudential Center in Newark to the Canadian Tire Centre in the suburb of Kanata. (Yes, that's pronounced roughly like the name of the country.) It's in that weird range of "Too close to fly, too far to get there any other way."

Air Canada, voted North America's top airline 5 years in a row, is the cheapest way to fly there. Except it's not cheap: $1,234 round-trip from Newark Liberty to Ottawa Macdonald-Cartier International Airport. (Sir John A. Macdonald was the 1st Prime Minister. He and George-Etienne Cartier are considered, respectively, the fathers of English Canada and French Canada.) And they don't fly non-stop: You'd have to change planes in Toronto, or possibly in Montreal. Yow! (Which is also Ottawa's airport code: YOW. All Canadian airports' codes start with the letter Y.) So, what are your other options?

The train is not an option. Amtrak does not go directly there. You could get on the Adirondack out of New York's Penn Station at 8:15 Monday morning, and arrive at Montreal's Gare Centrale at 7:11 that night. But while VIA Rail Canada offers 6 trains a day from Montreal to Ottawa, it takes about 2 hours, and it's only C$44 each way, the last one each day leave Montreal at 6:50 PM, right before you'd arrive from New York. So unless you want to get a hotel in Montreal and start out the next morning, you can't get from New Jersey to Ottawa by rail.

So your best options are to take the bus or to drive. Greyhound does operate in Canada. However, again, you would have to change in Montreal. This time, however, it could be done. You could leave Port Authority in New York at 12:00 midnight on Monday, reach Montreal at 7:55 on Tuesday morning, switch to a bus to Ottawa at 9:00, and be in Ottawa by 11:30.

The return trip is a little trickier: Presuming the game ends before 10:00 on Tuesday night, the next bus back to Montreal will be at 2:30 Sunday morning, arriving in Montreal at 5:00, and then you would catch your New York bus at 7:30, change at Albany at 1:05 in the afternoon to a bus leaving at 1:30, and arrive at 4:20. This is still doable, whereas the train really isn't. Round-trip fare is $320, though it can drop to $227 with advanced purchase. The Ottawa Central Station is at 265 Catherine Street, at the intersection of Catherine Street and Kent Street.

If you're driving, get to Interstate 80, and take it all the way across New Jersey. Shortly after crossing the Delaware River and entering Pennsylvania, take I-380, following the signs for Scranton, until reaching I-81. (If you've driven to a game of the Yankees' Triple-A farm team, the Scranton/Wilkes-Barre RailRiders, you already know this part.) Take I-81 north into New York State. (If you've driven to a game of the Mets' Double-A farm team, the Binghamton Rumble Ponies, you already know this part.) Continue on I-81 past Binghamton, Syracuse and Watertown, all the way up to the border, at the Thousand Islands on the St. Lawrence River.

You need to take this next part seriously. Because Canadian Customs will. You'll be asked your citizenship, and you'll have to show your passport and your photo ID. You'll be asked why you're visiting Canada. Seeing a Devils vs. Senators game should be reason enough, although, if you got your tickets by mail, showing them to the Customs agent won't hurt.

If you're bringing a computer with you (counting a laptop, but probably not counting a smartphone), you don't have to mention it, but you probably should. Chances are, you won't be carrying a large amount of food or plants; if you were, depending on how much, you might have to declare them.

Chances are, you won't be bringing alcohol into the country, but you can bring in one of the following items duty-free, and anything above or in addition to this must have duty paid on it: 1.5 litres (53 ounces) of wine, or 8.5 litres (300 ounces or 9.375 quarts) of beer or ale, or 1.14 litres (40 ounces) of hard liquor. If you have the slightest suspicion that I'm getting any of these numbers wrong, check the Canada Customs website. Better yet, don't bring booze in. Or out.

As for tobacco, well, you shouldn't use it. But, either way over the border, you can bring up to 200 cigarettes, 50 cigars, and 200 grams (7 ounces) of manufactured tobacco. And, on October 14, 2016, President Obama finally ended the ban on bringing Cuban cigars into America. This also applies to rum, for which Cuba is also renowned. It is still considerably easier to buy these items in Canada than in America, but, now, you can bring them back over the border.

If you've got anything in your car (or, if going by bus or train, in your pockets or your luggage) that could be considered a weapon, even if it's a disposable razor or nail clippers, tell them. And while Canada does have laws that allow you to bring in firearms if you're a licensed hunter (you'd have to apply for a license to the Province where you plan to hunt), the country has the proper attitude concerning guns: They hate them. They go absolutely batshit insane if you try to bring a firearm into their country. Which, if you're sane, is actually the sane way to treat the issue.

You think I'm being ridiculous? How about this: Seven of the 45 U.S. Presidents -- 9 counting the Roosevelts, Theodore after he was President and Franklin right before -- have faced assassins with guns, 6 got hit and 4 died; but none of the 23 people (including 1 woman) to serve as Prime Minister of Canada has ever faced an assassination attempt. John Lennon recorded "Give Peace a Chance" in Montreal and gave his first "solo concert" in Toronto, but he got shot and killed in New York. In fact, the next time I visit Canada, I half-expect to see a bumper sticker that says, "GUNS DON'T KILL PEOPLE, AMERICANS WITH GUNS KILL PEOPLE."

(Another note about weapons: I'm a fan of the CBS-TV show NCIS, which airs in Canada on Global Network TV. If you are also a fan of this show, and you usually observe Gibbs Rule Number 9, "Never go anywhere without a knife," you need to remember that these are rules for members of Gibbs' team, not for civilians. So, this time, forget the knife, and leave it at home. If you really think you're going to need it -- as a tool -- mention the knife to the border guard, and show it to him, and tell him you have it to use as a tool in case of emergency, and that you do not intend to use it as a weapon. Do not mention the words "Rule Number 9" or quote said rule, or else he'll observe his Rule Number 1: "Do not let this jackass into your country, eh?" And another thing: Border guards, and the Royal Canadian Mounted Police, most likely will observe a variation on Gibbs Rule Number 23: "Never mess with a Mountie's Tim Hortons coffee if you want to live.")

And if you can speak French, don't try to impress the Customs officials with it. You're going into Ontario, not Quebec.

When crossing back into the U.S., in addition to what you would have to declare on the way in (if you still have any of it), you would have to declare items you purchased and are carrying with you upon return, items you bought in duty-free shops or (if you flew) on the plane, and items you intend to sell or use in your business, including business merchandise that you took out of the United States on your trip. There are other things, but, since you're just going for hockey, they probably won't apply to you. Just in case, check the Canadian Customs website I linked to above.

After going through Customs, I-81 will become Ontario Route 137. You won't be on this for long, as it terminates at O-401, the Macdonald-Cartier Freeway. (This road is named for the founding fathers of English and French Canada, respectively: First Prime Minister Sir John A. Macdonald, and George-Etienne Cartier, responsible for getting Quebec's support for Confederation, Canada's 1867 independence.)

Take the Freeway East, to Exit 721A, which will put you on O-416 North. Exit 75A will put you on the Queensway West. You'll take this until Exit 140, east on Terry Fox Drive, named for the man who tried to walk across Canada on a prosthetic leg to raise money for cancer research until his own cancer returned and stopped him. The 1st right will be Palladium Drive. (The arena's original name was The Palladium.) The Canadian Tire Centre will soon be on your right. The official address is 1000 Palladium Drive in Kanata, about 14 1/2 miles west of downtown.

You should be in New Jersey for an hour and 15 minutes (after getting out of your driveway, that is), Pennsylvania for an hour and a half, New York State for 3 hours, and Ontario for an hour and 45 minutes, for a total of 7 and a half hours. If you make 3 rest stops – I would recommend at or near Scranton and Syracuse, and count Customs, where they will have a restroom and vending machines – and if you don't do anything stupid at Customs, such as fail to produce your passport, or flash a weapon, or say you watch South Park (a show with a vendetta against Canada for some reason), or call Sidney Crosby a cheating, diving pansy (even though he is one) – the trip should take less than 11 hours.

Once In the City. Ottawa was originally named Bytown, named for the general who commanded the first fort there. The name Ottawa comes from the Algonquin word meaning "to trade," as it was founded in 1826 as a trading post. On December 31, 1857, Britain's Queen Victoria was asked to choose a common capital for the Province of Canada, and she chose Ottawa.

Her advisers suggested it for several reasons. Ottawa's position in the back country made it more defensible, while still allowing easy transportation over the Ottawa River. Ottawa was at a point nearly exactly midway between Toronto and Quebec City (310 miles between the capitals of Ontario and Quebec). The smaller size of the town also made it less prone to rampaging politically motivated mobs, as had happened in the previous Canadian capitals.

Ottawa is home to about 935,000 people, making it the 10th-largest in the NHL (13th if you split up the New York and Los Angeles markets), but its metropolitan area has just 1.3 million, making it smaller than any U.S. metro area with a major league sports team. It's already lost 2 pro football teams and a Triple-A baseball team in the last 20 years, although they rejoined the Canadian Football League last year and got a new Double-A baseball team this year.

Canada's Conservative Party government got rid of the hated Goods & Services Tax (GST), but replaced it with a Harmonized Sales Tax (HST), which is 13 percent in Ontario -- in other words, it's a consumption tax that hits the poor and the middle class a lot harder than it hits the rich, which means Canada's conservatives are just as bastardish as America's.

Ottawa's north-south streets increase in address numbers moving away from the Ottawa River, while the Rideau Canal divides the city into east and west. OC Transpo (not "Transport") runs public transit in the area, with single rides costing C$3.45. Get a DayPass for C$8.10. The city has no "beltway."

The drinking age in the Province of Ontario is 19. Across the river in Quebec, it's 18. Postal Codes in the Ottawa section of Ontario start with the letter K, and on the Quebec side of the river, with J. The Area Code for Ottawa is 613, and for the Quebec side 819, with 873 as an overlay. Hydro Ottawa runs the electricity.

The population of Ottawa is about 74 percent white, 17 percent Asian, 6 percent black, 2 percent Aboriginal/Native Canadian/First Nations, and just over 1 percent Hispanic. About 37 percent can speak both English and French, but the percentage of "mother tongues" runs about 62 percent English, 14 percent French, and 20 percent others, including 3 percent each for Arabic and Chinese, and 1 percent each for Spanish and Italian.

Going In. The Number 401 bus goes directly from Ottawa Central Station to the arena, 17 miles to the southwest, taking 26 minutes. General parking is C$15.
The Canadian Tire Centre, set up for the 2012 NHL All-Star Game.
At the time, it was named Scotiabank Place.

The building was originally named The Palladium. But soon after it opened in 1996, it was changed to the Corel Centre, after an Ottawa-based software company. In 2006, it became Scotiabank Place, after the Halifax-based bank. In 2013, Toronto-based Canadian Tire bought the naming rights.

Oddly, while Canada uses the British spelling for most words, they don't use "tyre" for a car's wheels the way the British do. Nor is the arena, due to its sponsored name, nicknamed "The Garage." The building is round, and the rink is laid out east-to-west. The Senators attack twice at the west end.
Since December 2014, Senators Sports and Entertainment has been negotiating with the National Capital Commission (NCC) for the redevelopment of LeBreton Flats in downtown Ottawa. The proposal includes a new arena, along with other mixed uses. It's still a plan, though, so the earliest it would open is the 2021-22 season.

Food. Getting something to eat at Canadian Tire Centre isn't going to be a problem.The 111 Deli & Pub and the 212 Deli & Pub, named for the sections they're behind, feature sandwiches and standard "pub grub." Bytown Grill and The Ledge Carvery & Bar serve similar fare. Frank Finnigan's, a restaurant named for an early Senators great (more about whom shortly), is more "casual dining."

The arena goes international as well, with stands for Chef Bento Sushi, Golden Palace Egg Rolls, and the Toronto-based "favourite" Pizza Pizza. There's Burger Shack stands, and what would a Canadian point of interest be without Tim Hortons? Ottawans may hate the Toronto Maple Leafs, for whom Horton played so nobly for so long, but they're still Canadians, and so they gotta have their Timmy's.

And, while the Outaouais region includes western Quebec, no one says you have to eat that foul poutine, which, in one bite, comes close to undoing all the good La Belle Province has ever done. Nevertheless, if you can actually keep the stuff down (in which case your stomach is stronger than mine), Smoke's Poutinerie stands are at Sections 107, 113, 119, and a larger section at 225.

Team History Displays. Only 2 men associated with the current Senators franchise have been elected to the Hockey Hall of Fame: Roger Neilson, who coached them from 2001 to 2003, and Dominik Hasek, who tended goal for them in the 2005-06 season.

This season, on February 18, 2020, the Senators will officially retire the Number 4 of defenseman Chris Phillips, 1997-2015. It will join the 11 of right wing Daniel Alfredsson, 1995-2013; and the 8 of Frank Finnigan.

Finnigan came from Shawville, Quebec, not far from Ottawa, so he was a "local boy who made good." He was honored for his play for the original Ottawa Senators, as a right wing, 1923–31 & 1932–34, including being an integral part of their 1927 Stanley Cup win.

Due to the Great Depression, the Senators did not play in the 1931-32 season, and the Toronto Maple Leafs were allowed to sign him, enabling him to win that season's Stanley Cup with the Leafs. He was the Senators' Captain upon their return. But after that season, they moved to St. Louis, already known for good support of a minor-league team. Finnigan scored the final goal in the history of the old Senators. The St. Louis Eagles were terrible in 1934-35 and folded, selling him back to the Leafs, for whom he played until 1937. He served in the Royal Canadian Air Force in World War II and managed hotels.

Finnigan was the last surviving Senator from the Stanley Cup winners of 1927 -- still the last Cup won by an Ottawa team -- and participated in the "Bring Back The Senators" campaign. Sadly, he died in 1991, living long enough to see the city officially announced as returning to the NHL, but not long enough to see them play. His Number 8 was raised to the rafters of the Ottawa Civic Centre, and his son Frank Finnigan Jr. was invited to drop the ceremonial puck before the 1st home game.

The Senators also have a banner honoring Brian Desmond Smith. "Smitty" was an Ottawa native who played left wing for the Los Angeles Kings and Minnesota North Stars of the NHL, the Houston Aeros of the WHA, and the Hull-Ottawa Canadiens in junior hockey. He became the sports anchor at CTV station CJOH-Channel 13, and was shot and killed by a mentally disturbed man in 1995. Smitty's banner has the Number 18 he wore for Hull-Ottawa. Although not officially retired, the number is not currently worn by any Senators player.

This past February 3, the Senators announced the results of fan voting for a 25th Anniversary Team:

* Forwards: Alfredsson, Radek Bonk, Mike Fisher, Martin Havlat, Dany Heatley, Marian Hossa, Chris Kelly, Chris Neil, Jason Spezza, Kyle Turris, Antoine Vermette and Alexei Yashin.

* Defensemen: Phillips, Zdeno Chara, Steve Duchesne, Erik Karlsson, Wade Rdden and Anton Volchenkov.

* Goaltenders: Craig Anderson and Patrick Lalime.

Anderson is still with the team; Neil, Kelly, Karlsson and Turris were at the time of the voting.

The Senators have also established a Ring of Honour, but, for the moment, it only has 1 member, 2005-08 head coach and 2007-16 general manager Bryan Murray.

The Senators also hang 9 Stanley Cup banners, representing the achievements of the original team, originally known as the Ottawa Hockey Club and then the Ottawa Silver Seven, before taking the Ottawa Senators name. The banners represent the Cup wins of 1903, 1904, 1905, 1909, 1911, 1920, 1921, 1923, 1927. And they hang banners representing their 2003 President's Trophy and their 2007 Eastern Conference Championship, and for their Division titles of 1999, 2001, 2003 and 2006.
A street that loops around the arena is named Cyclone Taylor Blvd., and the street on the east side of the arena is named Frank Finnigan Way. Other nearby streets are Frank Nighbor Place and Silver Seven Way. (Back in the days when hockey had 7 players on the ice, including the now-discarded position of "rover," the Ottawa Hockey Club was nicknamed the Silver Seven, before they officially became the Senators.)

Hockey Hall-of-Famers from the original Senators include:

* From their 1903, 1904 and 1905 Cup winners: Player-coach Alf Smith, his brother Tommy Smith, Billy Gilmour, J.B. "Bouse" Hutton, Frank McGee, Harvey Pulford and Harry "Rat" Westwick.

* From their 1909 and 1911 Cup winners: Gilmour, (in 1909 but not 1911), Taylor, Pecy LeSueur, Bruce Stewart, Marty Walsh and Jack Darrah (in 1911 but 1909).

* From their 1920, 1921, 1923 and 1927 Cup winners: Darragh, Nighbor, Finnigan, owners Tommy Gorman and Frank Ahearn, Clint Benedict, George "Buck" Boucher, Harry "Punch" Broadbent, Sprague Cleghorn, Cy Denneny, Eddie Gerard, Frank "King" Clancy, Jack Adams, Alex Connell and Reginald "Hooley" Smith. Nighbor, Boucher and Denneny were the only players to play on all 4 of their 1920s Cup-winning teams.

No member of the Senators organization has received the Lester Patrick Trophy for contributions to hockey in America. Denneny, Nighbor, Clancy and Benedict were named to The Hockey News' 100 Greatest Hockey Players in 1998. Finnigan and Al Shields were named to the NHL All-Stars to oppose the host Toronto Maple Leafs in the Ace Bailey Benefit Game on February 12, 1934, which is now recognized as the 1st NHL All-Star Game. Clancy from the original Senators, and Hasek from the new one, were named to the NHL's 100th Anniversary 100 Greatest Players this year.

The Memorial Cup, the championship of Canadian junior hockey, has been won by Ottawa-area teams 7 times: The Ottawa-Hull Junior Canadiens in 1958; the Hull Olympiques in 1971; the Cornwall Royals in 1972, 1980 and 1981; and the Ottawa 67's in 1984 and 1999.

The Senators' biggest rivalry is with the Toronto Maple Leafs, across the Province. It's known as the Battle of Ontario, and the Senators lead it, but it's close: 70-68-3. Actually, the Montreal Canadiens are closer to Ottawa than Toronto is, 138 miles as opposed to 241.

Stuff. Souvenir stands are all over the arena. There are large team stores at Gate 1 at street level, a "vintage" products location at club level, a "Main Street" location on the 200 level, and a jersey-customization shop on the upper bowl level.

There aren't many books about the Senators. The best one I could find on Amazon was about the original version, Chris Robinson's 2004 book Ottawa Senators: Great Stories From the NHL's First Dynasty. J. Alexander Poulton (a name that sounds like it would have been around in the days of the old Silver Seven) wrote one about the current franchise: The Ottawa Senators: The Best Players and the Greatest Games.

Team videos are also in short supply: The only thing I could find on the Sens was the 2007 Stanley Cup highlight film -- and they lost the Finals, ignominiously, in 5 games to the Anaheim Ducks. Of the 5 times a Canadian team has reached the Stanley Cup Finals since 1993, that was the only time they didn't win at least 3 games, and then get screwed by the league and lose in Game 7. The Senators were so pathetic, Gary Bettman didn't have to have his officials fix the games, or (in the case of the Boston Bruins letting the ice melt a little in Boston for Game 6) allow the American team to cheat.

During the Game. A November 19, 2014 article on The Hockey News' website ranked the NHL teams' fan bases, and listed the Senators' fans 16th. That puts them roughly in the middle overall, but 7th and last among Canadian teams: "The least supported of the Canadian teams by a wide margin." They have Toronto 1st, Montreal 3rd, Vancouver 4th, Edmonton 5th, Winnipeg 7th and Calgary 8th.

I don't know how they figured that, because Ottawans love their Senators. But they don't hate the Devils or their fans. You do not need to fear wearing Devils gear to a Senators game. Maple Leafs, maybe. Canadiens, possibly. But not Devils. As long as you don't mock their country, their flag or their National Anthem, they will leave you alone. (They care intensely about their flag, and will sometimes move a large one around the stands, as seen in the photo below.)
Since the game is in Canada, the National Anthem presentation will be unusual to you, with the order reversed from what you're used to: Lyndon Slewidge, a retired Ontario Provincial Police officer, will sing "The Star-Spangled Banner" first, and then "O, Canada." Because Ottawa is next-door to Quebec, "O, Canada" may be begun in French, and switched to English halfway through, as is traditionally done in Montreal. (When Quebec still had the Nordiques, it was sung entirely in French, although "The Star-Spangled Banner" was sung entirely in English.)

The Senators' mascot is Spartacat the Lion, perhaps a tribute to the country's English roots. The Senators have also outright ripped off the baseball team in our nation's capital. Instead of "Racing Presidents," they have 4 guys in period suits with big foam heads designed to resemble 4 of Canada's most prominent Prime Ministers: Sir John A. Macdonald (the 1st, 1867-73 and 1878-91), Sir Wilfrid Laurier (1896-1911, the 1st Francophone PM and, for the way he espoused Canadian nationalism, often compared to our Theodore Roosevelt), Sir Robert Borden (1911-20, including during World War I) and William Lyon Mackenzie King (the longest-serving PM, off and on from 1921 to 1948, including during World War II).

Each of them is on Canadian paper money: Laurier on the $5 bill, Macdonald on the $10, Mackenzie King on the $50 and Borden on the $100. (Queen Elizabeth II is on the $20 and all the coins, while there hasn't been a $1 or $2 bill for many years.)
Left to right: Laurier, Borden, Macdonald, Mackenzie King
and Spartacat, with some friends, challenge
the Nationals' Presidents. So far, no acceptance.

Each of Canada's 1st 8 Prime Ministers were knighted by the British Empire, but Borden is the last to receive this honor, and Mackenzie King's assertion of Canadian control, rather than British control, over Canada's government ended such things. To do this, he had to outflank the man who was then Canada's Governor-General -- the monarch's representative in the country and thus head of state -- and also Canada's greatest living military hero, Viscount Byng of Vimy. If the Viscount's name seems familiar, it's because his wife donated the award for "the most gentlemanly player" in the NHL, the Lady Byng Trophy.

Of course, these Prime Ministers don't race around the "field": Rather than put on skates and go on the ice, they just go around the arena and do typical mascot things. But, because they are "old men" -- Sir John A. was 76 when he died in office, Laurier 70 when he was finally defeated by Borden, Borden 66 when he retired, and Mackenzie King 74 when he packed up his 3rd and final government -- they've been jokingly compared to Statler and Waldorf, the elderly hecklers from The Muppet Show.

ESPN hockey writer Patrick Smith commented, "Old, grey-haired men with straight faces or frowns don't really scream, 'Get excited for hockey,' unless the face is Don Cherry's. That said, former Prime Ministers in Ottawa makes sense, because of the political nature of the city." And, with Mackenzie King having died in 1950, there's no chance of a more recent figure stirring up resentments, the way John Diefenbaker (1957-63), Pierre Trudeau (1968-84), or the still-living Brian Mulroney (1984-93) or Jean Chretien (1993-2004) might do. (The Washington Nationals have added a John F. Kennedy, who's now widely seen as a "safe" figure, but not the much more recent Ronald Reagan.)

The Senators' goal song is "Wake Me Up" by Avicii. This is a horrible recording (what did you expect, the people of Sweden can play hockey and tennis well, but they can't make music worth a damn), with no chantable lyrics or even sounds. Their victory song is "You Make My Dreams Come True" by Hall & Oates. Not exactly a big rouser -- and hardly anybody has made Senators' fans dreams come true since the 2007 Eastern Conference Finals.

After the Game. The Canadian Tire Centre is an island in a sea of parking in a suburb of a big city, in Canada rather than America. Safety will not be an issue. You will be safe. If you drove in, your car will be safe, too -- even if you have a Maple Leafs sticker on your car. (But why would you?)

There isn't much around the arena: Just office parks, car dealerships and big-box stores. So you may have to head all the way back downtown to get a postgame meal or pint. The Senate Sports Tavern & Eatery, at 33 Clarence Street, just a few steps down from the U.S. Embassy on Parliament Hill, has been noted as a hockey fans' bar.

If your visit to Ottawa is during the European soccer season, as we are now in, Georgetown Sports Pub bills itself as "Ottawa's #1 soccer pub!" (Exclamation point theirs, not mine.) 1159 Bank Street, downtown.

Sidelights. By American standards, Ottawa is very small-time. For decades, the biggest sports team in town was a Canadian Football League team that, while once very successful, no longer exists. Pro football has had a troubled last 20 years there, they've never had a Major League Baseball team, they didn't have a Triple-A baseball team for very long, they've never had an NBA team, the pro basketball team they do have is minor-league (Canada does have a league, but it's not even at the level of the NBA's D-League), and from 1934 to 1992, hockey fans in the region had to rely on the junior and university levels. And even when the Senators arrived, in their 2nd season, 1993-94, they set an NHL record by losing 70 games. It was like, "We waited 58 years for this?"

Nevertheless, by Canadian standards, Ottawa would be an important city even if it were not the capital. Here are some notable sites in the area:

* LeBreton Flats. This park, on the river across from the Canadian War Museum, is the site currently projected for the Senators' new arena, currently named the Ottawa Major Events Centre. The earliest it would open is for the 2021-22 NHL season.

* Raymond Chabot Grant Thornton Park. Formerly named Ottawa Baseball Stadium, JetForm Park and Lynx Stadium, its naming rights are now held by an accounting firm. As Triple-A stadiums go, its 10,332-seat capacity is about average. As Double-A stadiums go, it's huge.
The Ottawa Lynx of the International League played there from 1993 to 2007, and won the Pennant in 1995. Appropriately, they were then the top farm team of the Montreal Expos, producing players such as Rondell White and Cliff Floyd. But new owners moved the team to Pennsylvania, and 2 other teams failed in the interim.

The Ottawa Champions began play there in 2014, in the independent Can-Am League. Managed by former San Francisco Giants and Yankees infielder, and former Houston Astros manager, Hal Lanier, they won their 1st Pennant last season, so the name isn't just a name anymore. 300 Coventry Road at Vanier Parkway, in the East End. Number 9 bus.

* Ottawa Civic Centre complex. This was originally the site of the Ottawa Exposition Grounds, used for equestrian events, lacrosse and rugby -- which, as in America, evolved into a game that its home country called "football." The team that became known as the Ottawa Rough Riders began play there in 1876, and were Canada's oldest continually-operating professional sports team when financial difficulties forced them to fold in 1996.

Lansdowne Park, Ottawa's longtime football stadium, began when a grandstand was built on the north side in 1908. A south side grandstand was built in 1924, and replaced with a larger stand in 1960.

The north side grandstand was demolished so that a new arena, the Ottawa Civic Centre, could be built, and a new north side grandstand was incorporated into the structure. The Civic Centre opened at the end of 1967, and a new Ontario Hockey League team, the Ottawa 67's -- named for Canada's Confederation and Centennial years, as well as for their debut -- began play there.
Frank Clair Stadium, with the Civic Centre
and the Aberdeen Pavilion behind it.

The 67's have played there ever since, except for the 2012-13 and 2013-14 seasons, when the Civic Centre was renovated, and they had to groundshare with the Senators. They've won the Memorial Cup, the championship of Canadian junior hockey, in 1984 and 1999.

The Senators played their 1st 4 seasons there, 1992 to 1996, but the building's small capacity, 10,585, made it unsuitable as a long-term home, necessitating the building now named the Canadian Tire Centre. The Civic Centre also hosted Ottawa's entries in the World Hockey Association, the Nationals and later the Civics.
The Civic Centre, with minimal seating on one side,
so it can support half the football stadium.

At its peak, the stadium, renamed in 1993 for longtime Rough Riders coach and general manager Frank Clair, seated nearly 31,000 people. (Clair was from the Cincinnati area, and played end at Ohio State and in 1941 for the Washington Redskins.) The Riders -- known as Ottawa Football Club from 1876 to 1897, and the Senators until 1930 -- won Canada's football championship, the Grey Cup, 9 times: 1925, 1926, 1940, 1951, 1960, 1968, 1969, 1973, and in their Centennial season of 1976.

From 2002 to 2006, the Ottawa Renegades played at Frank Clair Stadium, wearing the red and black "colour" scheme of the Riders, but were short on cash and victories, and folded. In 2014, a new team, with the unimaginative named of the Ottawa Redblacks, launched at a renovated complex, with the stadium and arena both now named for TD Bank. (TD stands for Toronto-Dominion.) The new owners wanted to bring back the Rough Riders name, but the Regina-based Saskatchewan Roughriders (1 word, as opposed to the 2 that the Ottawa club had used) didn't want to go through that again.

Officially, the Redblacks carry the history of the Rough Riders, including their Grey Cups and their retired numbers. They just added a Grey Cup of their own, beating the Calgary Stampeders 39-33 in Toronto.

The new TD Place Stadium is also home to Ottawa Fury FC, of the United Soccer League (USL), the 3rd division of North American soccer. It also hosted 9 games of the 2015 Women's World Cup, including the U.S. team's Quarterfinal win over China. It may also be home to a team in the new Canadian Premier League that is being planned for Spring 2018, although it is not a given that the team would be the Fury.

In late 2017, the stadium hosted the Grey Cup Final, with the Toronto Argonauts defeating the Calgary Stampeders 27-24; and the NHL 100 Classic, an outdoor hockey game, in which the Senators beat the Montreal Canadiens 3-0.
TD Place, with the Civic Centre beside it.

The Aberdeen Pavilion, a long barnlike structure with a domed cupola, was adjacent to the stadium. Built in 1898, it is the oldest building in North America to have hosted the finals of a major league sport, having hosted the old Senators (then still Ottawa HC or the Silver Seven) in the 1903-04 season, including the Finals. (They were in a dispute with arena owner Ted Dey.)

As with the Grand National Livestock Pavilion outside San Francisco, a.k.a. the Cow Palace, it hosted livestock shows, and was nicknamed the Cattle Castle. Nearly demolished due to its disrepair, it was renovated instead, and reopened to the public in 1994.
1015 Bank Street at Queen Elizabeth Drive, on the Rideau Canal, about 2 miles south of downtown. Number 1 bus.

* Homes of the old Senators. The Senators bounced around a bit in their earlier days, settling at Dey's Arena, downtown at the northwest corner of Bay Street & Gladstone Avenue. The Senators won the Stanley Cup there in 1903, 1905 and 1906 (with the 1904 Cup being won at Aberdeen Pavilion). This rink burned down in 1920.

Dey's Arena was quickly outgrown, so the Deys built a 7,000-seat structure named simply The Arena, for the 1907-08 season. Here, the Silver Seven/Senators won the Cup in 1909, 1911, 1920, 1921 and 1923. (Actually, the '21 and '23 Cups were clinched on the road, but it was still their home ice at the time.) Despite being the largest arena in Canada at the time, and having a heated locker room (a big innovation at the time), it wasn't so good for the fans, as interior support poles obstructed a lot of views.
Postcard of Dey's Arena, dated 1910

After the Senators moved into the Auditorium in 1923, The Arena's days were numbered. It was torn down in 1927, and Confederation Park was put on the site. That park, across Laurier Avenue from City Hall, contains memorials to Canadian soldiers and sailors of the Boer War, and to Aboriginal war veterans (a.k.a. First Nations or, as we would say here, Indians or Native Americans). Downtown at Slater & Elgin Streets, Laurier Avenue and the Rideau Canal.

* Ottawa Auditorium. Opening in 1923, this was the last home of the original Ottawa Senators. It hosted the clinching game of the 1924 Stanley Cup Finals, because the Montreal Canadiens asked for it since their new Forum hadn't yet been built. The Senators won the Cup there in 1927.

It seated 7,500 people for hockey, but could be expanded to 10,000 for concerts, and was sold out for 2 shows by Elvis Presley early in his career, on April 3, 1957. Lots of early rockers played the Auditorium, including Buddy Holly, Ray Charles, and Ottawa native Paul Anka. The Rolling Stones played it on their 1st North American tour in 1964, and Bob Dylan did so in 1966. The last event there was a concert by, appropriately, Guy Lombardo & His Royal Canadians, in Canada's Centennial year of 1967.
The Auditorium, 1954

The auditorium was then demolished, having been made obsolete by the building of the Civic Centre. A YMCA now stands on the site. O'Connor Street between Argyle Avenue and Catherine Street, downtown.

* College Football. The University of Ottawa's teams are called the Gee-Gees, and play their home games at the 4,152-seat Gee-Gees Field. The odd name is an abbreviation, as they used to be known by their colors, Garnet and Grey. (This also worked in French: Grenat et Gris.)

They've won 4 Yates Cups as champions of Ontario college football: 1907, 1975, 1976 and 2006. And they've won the Vanier Cup, Canada's national championship, in 1975 and 2000. 200 Lees Avenue, about 2 1/2 miles southeast of downtown. Bus 95.

Carleton University is their arch-rivals. They're more successful in basketball, having won 12 of the last 14 National Championships, including an 87-game winning streak from 2003 to 2006. Their football team plays at the 3,044-seat MNP Park, formerly Keith Harris Stadium. Bronson & Sunnyside Avenues, about 3 miles south of downtown. Bus 4.

Every year from 1955 until 1998, the teams played The Panda Game at Lansdowne Park. A stuffed toy named Pedro the Panda was given to the winner. Carleton suspended its football program after the 1998 season, but revived it in 2013, and the game was held at Gee-Gees Field since the Lansdowne Park site was being redeveloped. Since 2014, it's been held at the new TD Place stadium. Carleton has won the last 3 games, but U of O still leads the series, 33-15.

The closest MLB, NBA and MLS city to Ottawa is Toronto. The Scotiabank Arena (formerly the Air Canada Centre) is 251 miles from Parliament Hill. Don't count on Ottawa ever getting a team in either MLB or the NBA: It would rank 31st and last in metropolitan area population in either league. MLS is a longshot, too, especially with teams already in Toronto and Montreal.

At any rate, the Toronto Blue Jays are easily the most popular MLB team there, while NBA fandom is divided between the Toronto Raptors, the Los Angeles Lakers, and whatever team LeBron James happens to be playing for at any given time.

* Parliament Hill. Running along Wellington Street, bounded by the Ottawa River, the Portage Bridge and the Rideau Canal, this is home to Canada's national government -- like Capitol Hill in Washington, often shortened to just "The Hill." The original fort protecting the city was on the site, as a natural defense (or "defence" as they'd spell it).

The original Parliament building, the Centre Block, opened in 1866, in time for Confederation the next year, on Wellington at the foot of Metcalfe Street. It burned down on its own 50th Anniversary, on February 3, 1916 -- during World War I, leading many to suspect German sabotage. (Like with the USS Maine in Havana Harbor in 1898, triggering the Spanish-American War, no such sabotage was proven. Unlike the Americans of 1898, the Canadians of 1916 kept their heads.) Parliament met in a hotel for 4 years while reconstruction was undertaken.

By 1920, the new Centre Block was ready for Parliament to sit again, and in 1927 the Peace Tower was topped off, restoring the look of the old Victoria Tower and giving Ottawa its signature building. A new renovation is underway, and is expected to take until the building's centennial in 2020.
The Supreme Court of Canada is 3 blocks west on Wellington, at the foot of Kent Street. The National War Memorial, a.k.a. The Response, is on a triangle bounded by Wellington and a fork of Elgin Street. It includes a Tomb of the Unknown Soldier, and, like our counterpart at Arlington National Cemetery, always has a guard on duty.

* Government Houses. Rideau Hall is the official residence of the head of state, the Governor-General, the official representative of the British monarch, as Canada is still a part of the British Commonwealth. 1 Sussex Drive, at Princess Avenue and Rockcliffe Parkway. It is open to public tours.

Unlike Rideau Hall, the official residence of the head of government, the Prime Minister, doesn't have an official name like The White House. Rather, like that of the British Prime Minister, it is best known by its address, "24 Sussex" -- 24 Sussex Drive, at the foot of MacKay Street.

Built in 1868, and the official residence since 1951, it is strictly a residence and a reception area: The Prime Minister's office is on Parliament Hill, in the Langevin Block. So while "The White House" is synonymous with the President of the United States, and "10 Downing Street" or "Number 10" is for the Prime Minister of Britain, no one refers to the Prime Minister's office (either the role or the actual workplace) as "24 Sussex." (Rather, the Prime Minister's Office is called just that, sometimes abbreviated to "the PMO.") 24 Sussex is not open to public tours, but a virtual tour can show you the interiors.

Both Rideau Hall and 24 Sussex are about 2 miles northeast of Parliament Hill, across the Rideau River (as well as the Rideau Canal), in the New Edinburgh section of town. Number 7 or Number 9 bus from downtown.

Museums. Canada doesn't have "libraries" or museums for their Prime Ministers like we have for many of our Presidents. The aforementioned rival Prime Ministers, Wilfrid Laurier and Robert Borden, are buried in Ottawa: The former, a French Catholic, in Notre-Dame Cemetery; the latter, an English Protestant, in Beechwood Cemetery. Lester Pearson, the Nobel Peace Prize laureate who served as PM from 1963 to 1968, and for whom Toronto's main airport is named, is also buried near Ottawa, at MacLaren Cemetery in Wakefield, Quebec. (As for the other 2 PM mascots: Macdonald is buried in his hometown of Kingston, Ontario, and Mackenzie King in Toronto.)

As I said, Canada didn't have an official Prime Minister's residence until 1951. Laurier lived at what became known as Laurier House from 1897 until he died in 1919, and his widow stayed there until her death in 1923. She willed it to Mackenzie King (who never married), and he lived there until he died in 1950. His successor, Louis St. Laurent, didn't want to make it the official PM's residence, because he knew that, one day (in 1957, as it turned out), the Conservative Party would make a comeback, and he didn't want any Tories living in the house of Liberal icons Laurier and Mackenzie King.

So Canada's former answer to the White House is now under the banner of Parks Canada, and, unlike 24 Sussex, is open to public tours. 335 Laurier Avenue East at Chapel Street, in the Sandy Hill district. Number 5 bus from downtown.

The Canadian War Museum tells Canada's military story from the French and Indian War of 1756-63 to the present. Needless to say, with the Centennial of World War I (1914-18) being in progress, the museum is focusing on that conflict, which was central to establishing Canada's identity on the world stage. (Prime Minister Borden's lobbying of the British government led to the first separate Canadian Army, instead of having Canadian units assigned to British units, as had been the case through the Boer War.) A display honoring the 200th Anniversary of the War of 1812 (1812-15), which did so much to establish Canada's identity, may also still be in place, although scaled down since 2015. 1 Vimy Place at Booth Street, down Wellington Street, west of Parliament Hill. Several bus lines go there from downtown.

A much more peaceful setting is the Canadian Museum of History, formerly the Canadian Museum of Civilization. (While they use the American spelling, rather than the British "Civilisation," they use the British pronunciation -- hence, both major Star Trek captains, Montrealer William Shatner and Yorkshireman Patrick Stewart, say, "To seek out new life, and new SIV-il-igh-ZAY-shuns," instead of the American, "SIV-il-ih-ZAY-shuns.")

It serves about half the function of New York's Museum of Natural History, with a big anthropology and aboriginal peoples' section, and also the function of the Smithsonian Institution's Museum of American History, telling the story of a people that were a "nation" long before they were a "country." Like New York's Hayden Planetarium (part of the Museum of Natural History complex), it has an IMAX theater. 100 Rue Laurier at Rue Papineau in Gatineau, across the Alexandra and Portage Bridges from downtown. Oddly, bus service doesn't get very close, so you're probably better off walking the 20 minutes from Parliament Hill.

The other half of our Museum of Natural History's function, the story of the planet and its life, can be found at the Canadian Museum of Nature. 240 McLeod Street at Metcalfe Street downtown. A short walk, no bus necessary.

Canada's answer to our Metropolitan Museum of Art -- or, more accurately, to the Smithsonian's National Gallery of Art -- is the National Gallery of Canada. 380 Sussex Drive, at St. Patrick Street, at the foot of the Alexandra Bridge. Number 9 bus from downtown.

Frank Boucher, who starred for the original Senators before captaining the 1st 2 Ranger Stanley Cups and coaching the 3rd, is buried at South Gower Cemetery. South Gower Drive (Provincial Route 22), in Morrisburg, about 33 miles south of downtown Ottawa. Can't be reached without a car. (The Rangers made his uniform number the 1st one they retired, but retired it for someone else: He wore 7, as did Rod Gilbert.)

Ottawa isn't much for tall buildings. In fact, much like the fact that most of the taller buildings in Washington D.C. are, due to regulations in the District itself, across the Potomac River in Arlington and Alexandria, Virginia, so, too, are some of the tallest buildings in the Ottawa area across the Ottawa River in Gatineau, Quebec.

This includes the tallest, Les Terrasses de la Chaudière. Built in 1978, and standing 407 feet high, it is a federally-owned apartment building that houses over 6,500 government workers. Rue Eddy at Blvd. Alexandre Taché, right across the river from the War Museum. Number 8 bus from downtown.

The 469-foot Claridge Icon is now under construction, and will be the tallest building in the region in 2018. 485 Preston Street at Carling Avenue, about 2 miles southwest of Parliament Hill. Bus 85.

Although Alanis Morissette is from Ottawa, and Avril Lavigne got her big break by winning a contest to sing with Shania Twain onstage at the Canadian Tire Centre (then the Corel Centre), Ottawa isn't really known as a big music city the way Canada's big 3 cities -- Toronto, Montreal and Vancouver -- are. It does have an independent music scene, and the arena does host major music tours.

But the Beatles did not visit Ottawa on their North American tours, limiting their Canadian shows to the Montreal Forum and Maple Leaf Gardens. Nor did Elvis sing in Ottawa during his latter years, since his manager, "Colonel" Tom Parker, was actually an illegal immigrant from the Netherlands and couldn't cross borders. But, as I said, he sang in Ottawa early on, in 1957.

There have been a few TV shows and movies set in Ottawa -- national capitals are a natural for them -- but most Americans would never have heard of any of them. So I'll skip this item, although quite a few shows and films are now being filmed there, as Toronto, once a destination of choice for studios wishing to save money, has gotten a bit expensive.

*

Unlike Montreal, which is on a direct route, Interstate 87, north of New York and New Jersey, Ottawa is a bit out of the way for us. But Canada's capital is worth a visit, for reasons above and beyond hockey.

Tales of Christmas Past -- Real Ones

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A few years ago, because of the length of the post, I decided to split the real and fictional events of Christmas Day up. This year, I'm also taking out the music, the specials, and the sports stuff out, and giving them each separate entries.

December 25, in the 753rd year since the founding of the city of Rome – or so Dionysius Exiguus, working in AD 525, would have us believe – Yeshua ben Yoseph was born in Bethlehem, in what is now the West Bank, Palestinian Territories.

In Greek, his name (of which Joshua and Isaiah are also derivatives) became "Jesus.""Christ" is also a Greek word: "Christos" means "the anointed one."

Based on historical and astronomical evidence, and even passages in the Gospels themselves, this date is almost certainly incorrect. Besides, Jesus appears to be one of the last people in human history who would be concerned about people remembering his birthday. He'd rather we were good to each other.


December 25, 274: Christmas is still a minor celebration in Rome, not an official holiday. Instead, Emperor Aurelian dedicates a temple for Sol Invictus: "The Unconquered Sun." Previously, the Romans had called the god of the Sun "Apollo," and the Greeks had called him "Helios" -- although, in modern pop culture (such as on the Star Trek episode "Who Mourns for Adonais?"), even when he's depicted as a Greek god, he's usually called Apollo.

The name Sol Invictus has passed into history, although in 1888, British poet William Ernest Henley published a poem titled "Invictus," with its classic closing lines, "I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul." Which would seem to fly in the face of any religion.

December 25, AD 336: The 1st recorded Christmas celebration in Rome occurs. Emperor Constantine the Great had legalized Christianity with the Edict of Milan in 313, and called the Council of Nicaea in 325.

December 25, AD 597: Augustine of Canterbury -- considered the 1st Archbishop of Canterbury, the founder of the Catholic Church in England, and not to be confused with St. Augustine (Augustine of Hippo) -- leads priests to baptize more than 10,000 Anglo-Saxons in Kent.

December 25, AD 800: Charles the Great (a.k.a. Charles Le Magne, Charlemagne and Carolus Magnus) is crowned Holy Roman Emperor in Rome. Not that there was much about him that was holy.


December 25, AD 820: Emperor Leo V of the Byzantine Empire is assassinated inside the Hagia Sophia, the cathedral in Constantinople (now Istanbul, Turkey), by supporters of a rival, who becomes Emperor Michael II. 

The new Emperor also orders the exile of Leo's mother and wife, and the castration and exile of Leo's 4 sons, to end Leo's family line and prevent descendants from trying to retake the throne. One of the sons dies soon thereafter, while the others live out their lives in exile.

December 25, 1000: The Kingdom of Hungary is founded by King Stephen I.

December 25, 1065: Westminster Abbey is consecrated in London. But the King of England, Edward the Confessor, who ordered and funded its building, is too ill to attend, and dies early the next year. Which leads us to…


December 25, 1066: William, Duke of Normandy, a.k.a. William the Bastard and William the Conqueror, is crowned King William I of England at Westminster Abbey.


As the saying goes, never go into battle against a man called "the Bastard," because he's probably got a chip on his shoulder. And never go into battle against a man called "the Conqueror," because, chances are, he earned that nickname.


December 25, 1184: In Santa Claus, A Biography, historian Gerry Bowler notes that the Yule Log was one of the most widespread Christmas traditions in early modern Europe, with the first recording of its appearance dating to this time.

Bowler notes that the tradition's roots are debated -- some saying it is an "enfeebled version of the ancient Celtic human sacrifices" and others saying it's simply related to a feudal obligation of acquiring firewood.

Nevertheless, the log was a huge block, lasting for the Twelve Days of Christmas, and it was not burned completely its first year: Part of it was saved to light the following year's Yule Log. While the mostly burned wood waited for its duty to light a new Yule Log, it was kept around the house to ward off a range of misfortunes, including toothaches, mildew, lightning, house fires, hail and chilblains (an inflammation of small blood vessels brought on from exposure to cold).

December 25, 1492: La Santa María de la Inmaculada Concepción -- The Holy Mary of the Immaculate Conception -- runs aground in what's now Cap-Haïtien, Haiti. 

Seeing that his flagship is irretrievably damaged, Christopher Columbus orders his men to strip the timbers from the ship. The timbers were later used to build a fort which Columbus called La Navidad (Nativity, or Christmas), at Limonade. Today, it is part of Université D'Etat D'Haiti, Campus Roi Henri Christophe.

Despite several claims over the last 500 years or so, the wreck of the Santa María has never been found. The Pinta would also be wrecked on the return voyage. The Niña made it back to Spain, and made a trading voyage to Venezuela in 1501, but nothing further is recorded of her.

December 25, 1526: King Henry VIII orders that the main course of his Christmas feast be not a goose, which was traditional in England, but a turkey, a bird first brought to England that year. The 1933 film The Private Life of Henry VIII, with Charles Laughton in the title role, popularized the image of the Tudor monarch as a fat old guy gorging himself, with a turkey leg in his hand, even though he would have been just 35 at this point.

Turkeys became popular feast meals in England because they didn't have the usefulness of traditional English livestock: Cows for milk, chickens for eggs, sheep for wool. But up until the 1950s, a goose remained the traditional bird for the Christmas feast. A Christmas Carol, published in 1843, had Ebenezer Scrooge include as part of his redemption the ordering of the biggest goose in a butcher shop to be sent to the Crachit family. There's also an old song, going back at least that far:

Christmas is coming.
The goose is getting fat.
Please put a penny
in an old man's hat.
If you have no penny
a ha'penny (half-penny) will do.
If you have no ha'penny
then God bless you!

Other countries have their variations on Christmas dinner. Some English-speaking countries serve ham, which is also popular (as "hamón") in Spanish-speaking countries, including Mexico and the Philippines. Some use chicken, including India, and the Japanese began a tradition of going to Kentucky Fried Chicken on Christmas Day in the 1970s. Northern Italy uses poultry, while Southern Italy uses lamb or fish.

In Eastern Europe, including Poland (where the meal is held on Christmas Eve and is known as Wigilia, "vigil") and Austria, fried fish is often the meal of choice. Seafood is also common in French-speaking places, including Québec and New Orleans: The meal is called réveillon, or "waking," because you stay awake until midnight on Christmas Eve, and then the meal is served after midnight, when it's the 25th. Portuguese-speaking places, including Brazil, also tend to use fish.

And in Britain, the meal ends with a pudding -- but it's not what Americans call "pudding," be it chocolate, rice or tapioca. Whether black pudding, white pudding, Yorkshire pudding, bread pudding, blood pudding, or, celebrated in song, figgy pudding, it's a cake -- often recognizable to Americans as a "fruitcake."

And if you don't like fruitcake -- especially if you remember Johnny Carson's joke that there is only one fruitcake, and it gets eternally passed around -- well, do what I did when confronted as an adult with that other English classic, fish and chips: Presume that you didn't like it as a child because you'd never had it prepared and served the right way, and try it. You'll like it.

December 25, 1576: The earliest known firmly dated representation of a Christmas tree is on a sculpture at a home in Turckheim, Alsace, then part of Germany, but since 1918 part of France.

It may go back further than that. Martin Luther, who reached the height of his fame in the early 1520s, is said to have placed lit candles on an evergreen tree. This is not recommended. However, the tree's supposed German origins led to the best-known song about Christmas trees, "O Tannenbaum."

Tinsel has long been associated with Christmas trees. It used to be made out of lead, since it didn't tarnish like other metals. Of course, we now know that using lead for anything except pipes is a bad idea.

December 25, 1584: Princess Margaret of Austria is born in Graz, later to be the hometown of Arnold Schwarzenegger. She married King Philip III of Spain, and was thus Queen of Spain from 1598 until her death in 1611, from complications of childbirth, her 8th.

She was the mother of King Philip IV of Spain, Anne of Austria (later Queen of France under King Louis XIII, and mother of King Louis XIV), and Maria Anna of Spain (later Empress of Emperor Ferdinand III of the Holy Roman Empire).


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December 25, 1620: The Plymouth Pilgrims spend their 1st Christmas Day in the New World building their 1st structure in the New World, thus demonstrating their complete contempt for celebrating the birth of Jesus. To the Puritans, in America and in England, it was the death and Resurrection that mattered, not the birth.

December 25, 1635: Samuel de Champlain, the explorer known as "the Father of New France," dies from the effects of a stroke, at the city he founded, Québec -- which is still a capital, of the Province of Québec. He was 61.

December 25, 1642: Isaac Newton is born in Wolsthorpe-by-Colsterworth, Lincolnshire, in the north of England. And, from what I've heard of his personality, Sir Isaac could be considered, as they say in English "football," a Dirty Northern Bastard. In other words, if you messed with him, clearly (Don't say it, Mike!) you didn't understand (Don't say it!) the gravity of the situation. (He said it... )


Actually, since England had not yet adopted the Gregorian Calendar, Newton spent his whole life believing that he was born on December 25, 1642, but science (which he did so much to advance) now shows him to have been born on January 4, 1643.

December 25, 1643: Christmas Island in the Indian Ocean is found and named by Captain William Mynors of the English East India Company vessel, the Royal Mary. It became a British possession in 1888, and was transferred to Australian control in 1958.

December 25, 1647: The Puritan-led English Parliament bans the celebration of Christmas, considering it "a popish festival with no biblical justification," and "a time of wasteful and immoral behavior." Oliver Cromwell, essentially the country's dictator from 1647 until his death in 1658, probably never spoke the words, but he would have agreed with Ebenezer Scrooge's assessment of Christmas celebration: "Bah! Humbug!"

Parliament replaces the "popish festival" with a day of fasting, although no one seems to have had the guts to tell Cromwell, "Um, yeah, Ollie? A day of fasting sounds like Yom Kippur. You know: A Jewish holiday."

Protests followed, as pro-Christmas rioting broke out in several cities. For weeks, Canterbury was controlled by rioters, who decorated doorways with holly and shouted royalist slogans. 

The book The Vindication of Christmas, published in 1652, argued against the Puritans, and makes note of Old English Christmas traditions: Dinner, roast apples on the fire, card playing, dances with "plow-boys" and "maidservants," carol singing, and old Father Christmas, the English version of St. Nicholas, who still, in the 21st Century, bears as much of a resemblance to an old bishop as he does to the figure we have come to know as Santa Claus.

December 25, 1659: Christmas observance is outlawed in Boston, still a Puritan-controlled city. By this point, New Amsterdam (present-day New York) was a fully-functioning Dutch city, and, though also Protestant, celebrated Christmas.

This is not the source of either the New York-Boston rivalry, or of that classic New York phrase "Boston sucks." But if the New World Dutch knew what was going on up in Boston, they would have understood the sentiment.

December 25, 1660: With Cromwell dead, his son Richard refusing to take up his father's role as "Lord Protector," and the Restoration complete with the son of Charles I having been crowned as King Charles II, England's ban on celebrating Christmas is ended. Poor Robin's Almanack contained these lines:

Now thanks to God for Charles' return
Whose absence made old Christmas mourn
For then we scarcely did it know
Whether it Christmas were or no.
December 25, 1663: On December 19, in his now-famous diary, Samuel Pepys, a Member of Parliament in Britain, mentioned that it was a custom for tradesmen to collect "Christmas boxes" of money or presents on the 1st weekday after Christmas, as thanks for good service throughout the year.

This custom is linked to an older British tradition where the servants of the wealthy were allowed the next day to visit their families, since they would have to serve their masters on Christmas Day. The employers would give each servant a box to take home, containing gifts, bonuses, and sometimes leftover food. And so, December 26 became known in the British Empire as Boxing Day.

Other traditions involved with the day were masters and servants switching jobs for the day, the commensurate military version in which the enlisted men commanded the officers, and Football League (later Premier League) games.

December 25, 1681: The Puritan ban on Christmas in Boston is finally revoked, by the English-appointed governor, Edmund Andros. However, it would not be until the middle of the 19th Century that celebrating Christmas became fashionable in the Boston region.

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December 25, 1717: Giovanni Angelo Braschi is born in Cesena, Emilia-Romagna, Italy. The son of a count, in 1775 he was elected Pope, taking the name Pius VI. He was Pope throughout the War of the American Revolution.

He oversaw the establishment of the 1st Archdiocese in the new nation, that of Baltimore, as Maryland, named for St. Mary, was the one State founded by Catholics. Most of the places in this country founded by Catholic Frenchmen and Spaniards did not become States until taken by the English or the post-independence Americans.

Pope Pius VI condemned the French Revolution, for suppressing the Gallican Church. This did not please Napoleon Bonaparte, and he sent troops to occupy the Papal States in 1796. Pius refused to renounce the throne, and in 1798 he was arrested, brought to France, and imprisoned in Valence, dying there a year later.

Oddly, despite what can be argued was having been martyred for his faith, the Church has made no move to canonize him.

December 25, 1757: Benjamin Pierce is born in Chelmsford, Massachusetts, outside Lowell. A hero of the American Revolution, he served as Governor of New Hampshire twice between 1827 and 1830.

His son, Franklin Pierce, served New Hampshire in both houses of Congress, and was the 14th President of the United States, serving from March 4, 1853 to March 4, 1857. Benjamin died in 1839, having lived long enough to see Franklin elected to the Senate.

It is unknown if, when naming the character based on himself "Benjamin Franklin Pierce," Dr. Richard Hornberger (writing the book M*A*S*H: A Novel About Three Army Doctors under the name Richard Hooker) knew that Franklin Pierce's father was named Benjamin, although as a native of neighboring Maine, he might have known. (Franklin Pierce did go to Bowdoin College in Maine.)


December 25, 1776: George Washington, under cover of darkness, leads the Continental Army across the Delaware River. The next morning, when he's gotten all his troops across to the New Jersey side, he marches them 9 miles down the road, over which State Route 29 would eventually be built, and attacks the Hessians, German mercenaries fighting for Britain, who are sleeping off their Christmas revelry. Thus is won the Battle of Trenton, thus keeping the Patriot cause alive in the War of the American Revolution.

This crossing is memorialized in an 1851 painting by, with some irony, a German-born American, Emmanuel Leutze. In a further irony, the British got their revenge: In World War II, the Royal Air Force destroyed the original painting, by bombing its location, the Kunsthalle art museum in Bremen. Leutze also painted a copy that hangs in New York's Metropolitan Museum of Art.


But, like Jacques-Louis David's portrait of Napoleon, on a horse rearing back, leading his troops over the Alps, the painting is factually incorrect and logistically ridiculous. Just as Bonaparte, a brilliant military tactician, would have ridden a mule over the mountains (and there is a painting depicting that), a smart military veteran like Washington would never have stood up in his boat. It would have made him too easy a target, and it might have made the boat tip over.


The Pennsylvania location of the start of the crossing, then known as Taylorsville, is now known as Washington Crossing, in the Township of Upper Makefield. The New Jersey location where it finished is now known as Ewing, after one of Washington's aides, General James Ewing.


Among those who took part in the crossing were some future legends of American statecraft:


* Alexander Hamilton, Washington's Secretary of the Treasury and, in a way, the father of American conservatism.

* Henry Knox, Washington's Secretary of War, for whom the Kentucky army base and gold depository Fort Knox, and the seat of the University of Tennessee, Knoxville, is named.

* John Marshall, the longest-serving and most influential Chief Justice of the U.S. Supreme Court.

* And James Monroe, 5th President of the United States, and who, under 4th President James Madison during the War of 1812, had the unenviable task of serving as Secretary of State and War (Defense) at the same time, probably doing his country a greater service in that war than he did in the Revolution or his Presidency.

Monroe, who was 25 at the time, is often cited as the young man sitting behind Washington in the painting, holding the flag. That's another error: If any flags made the crossing, they would have been kept hidden, so as not to give their bearers away. Washington was a big believer in the element of surprise, hence the night crossing.

It was also around this time that kissing someone under mistletoe at Christmastime became a tradition, and that it was bad luck to refuse such a kiss. The plant is poisonous, and the word is believed to have come from German, "mist" meaning "dung," and "tang," meaning "branch." In other words, a stick of poop.

In the 1992 film Batman Returns, set right before Christmas, Batman (Michael Keaton) tells Catwoman (Michelle Pfeiffer), "Mistletoe can be deadly if you eat it." She tells him, "But a kiss can be even deadlier if you mean it." Later in the film, as Bruce Wayne and Selina Kyle dance at a Christmas party, Selina repeats Batman's line, and Bruce repeats Catwoman's response -- thus do they give away each other's secret identities. It's hard to believe Batman could make such a rookie mistake, but it's in the script.

Similarly, holly has a darker beginning than most people realize. It refers not to Christ's birth, but his death: The sharp leaves to the crown of thorns, and the red berries to his blood. "'Tis the season to be jolly"?

December 25,  1777: British Captain James Cook visits an island that he names Christmas Island. This is not the same place cited in the 1643 entry. The U.S. takes possession of it in 1856, but it goes back to Britain. In 1979, it becomes part of the newly independent nation of Kiribati -- pronounced "Kiribass" in the natives' language. The island is renamed "Kiritimati," but it is still pronounced "Christmas."

December 25, 1799: Augustinam Hejnek is born in Germany, although it's not clear where. In 1870, at age 70, "Augusta" Hejnek moved to Chicago. Eventually, she moved to Casimir, Wisconsin, where she died on March 1, 1908, at age 108. She is believed to have been the last surviving person born in the 18th Century.

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December 25, 1806: A riot occurs in Lower Manhattan -- or what would have been considered "Midtown" at the time. Fifty members of the Hide Binders, a nativist gang of apprentices and propertyless journeyman butchers, gather outside St. Peter's Church at 22 Barclay Street, to taunt Catholic worshipers leaving Midnight Mass.


There would be no formal New York Police Department until 1845, so what we would now call "neighborhood watch groups" tried to preserve order. The night watch prevented a serious disorder on the Eve, but on Christmas Day, Irishmen fearing a Hide Binder attack arm themselves with cudgels, stones and brickbats. A skirmish breaks out, a watchman is killed, and the Hide Binders invade the Irishtown. The riot only ends when magistrates are able to restore order.

The only people to get arrested were Irish -- a far cry from the post-Civil War era, by which point the vast majority of the NYPD was Irish-born, and it remained manned largely by men of Irish descent well into the 20th Century.

Traditionally, new groups have always been viewed suspiciously by the establishment in America.  The Irish, the Germans, the blacks, the Jews, the Italians, the Chinese, the Hispanics, and in more recent times the Arabs and the South Asians have all, against their will, taken their turns as the targeted group.


In the early days of the United States, Irish Catholics were particularly targeted and barred from holding office through a series of laws and requirements, such as a 1777 naturalization clause. The 1806 Christmas Riots occurred less than a year following the election of the 1st Irish Catholic member to the New York State Assembly.

December 25, 1815: The Handel and Haydn Society, the oldest continually operating performing arts organization in America, hosts its 1st performance, at King's Chapel in Boston. Given that Handel had written "Joy to the World," this is appropriate.

December 25, 1821: Clara Barton is born in Oxford, Massachusetts, outside Worcester. She goes on to found the American Red Cross. She lived on until 1912.

December 25, 1822: Clement Clarke Moore, a professor of literature and theology in New York, is asked by his children if there are any books about Santa Claus. He decides to find out, but discovers that no bookstore in town has any such book.


So he writes his own version of the story, "A Visit from St. Nicholas," which establishes so much of the Santa Claus legend that we know today. The story is published the following year. Moore was born in 1779, during the War of the American Revolution, and lived until 1863, during the American Civil War.

December 25, 1826: The Eggnog Riot, a.k.a. the Grog Mutiny, takes place at the United States Military Academy at West Point, New York. Twenty cadets were court-martialed. No. I am not making that up. There was an Eggnog Riot at West Point.

Among the cadets who took part, but was not punished, was Jefferson Davis, future U.S. Senator from Mississippi. He later served as Secretary of War under the aforementioned Franklin Pierce, and as President of the Confederate States of America.

December 25, 1831: The Great Jamaican Slave Revolt, also known as the Baptist War or the Christmas Rebellion, begins, led by the Reverend Samuel Sharpe. Up to 20 percent of Jamaica's slaves, 60,000 of them, mobilize. By January 4, 1832, British forces under the control of the inaptly-named Sir Willoughby Cotton put the rebellion down.

The "plantocracy" retaliates by killing 207 slaves during the revolt, and over 300 more through executions, including some for minor offenses such as theft. This infuriated the colonists' masters back in London, and the process of emancipation began. In 1833, slavery was banned throughout the British Empire, with a few exceptions, including Jamaica. That exemption was removed in 1838, and all others were by 1843 -- 22 years before America, and 46 years before Brazil became the last industrialized nation to ban it, in 1889.

December 25, 1835: Orville Elias Babcock is born in Franklin, Vermont. He went to West Point, and graduated 3rd in the Class of 1861. He was an aide to General Ulysses S. Grant during and after the American Civil War, and when Grant became President, he named Babcock his Secretary -- in modern terms, his White House Chief of Staff.

This was a mistake. He was indicted in 1875 as part of the Whiskey Ring, and again in 1876 as part of the Safe Burglary Committee. Both times, Grant's testimony gained him an acquittal, but damaged Grant's reputation. But the acquittals enabled him to serve as Inspector of Lighthouses in Florida under succeeding Presidents Rutherford B. Hayes, James Garfield and Chester Arthur. He died in 1884, still holding that job.

December 25, 1837: The Battle of Lake Okeechobee is fought in Florida, as part of the Second Seminole War. The Seminoles, under the command of Holata Micco (known to the U.S. government as Billy Bowlegs), defeats U.S. troops under the command of Colonel Zachary Taylor.

The problem was that Taylor's subcommander, Colonel Richard Gentry, was too timid to face the enemy, and was one of the American soldiers killed. Taylor's report back to Washington said so, and he was promoted to Brigadier General, and won the nickname "Old Rough and Ready." Though he lost the battle, it put him on the path to become the leading U.S. hero of the Mexican-American War of 1846-47, and to be elected President in 1848.

Eventually, the U.S. Army would win the war, and force the resettlement of the Seminoles to "the Indian Territory," present-day Oklahoma. Nonetheless, the name survives in Florida's Seminole County, and in the name of the sports teams at Florida State University, the Seminoles.

Holata Micco would live on until 1859, long enough to visit Washington, and to see a portrait of Taylor, who died in office in 1850, in the Capitol Building. Recognizing his old opponent, he pointed and said, "Me whip!"

December 25, 1843: With Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol having debuted earlier in the year, art shop owner Henry Cole prints up the first Christmas cards, costing one shilling each -- rather expensive by the standards of the time. But the debut in 1840 of the penny post -- a stamp costing 1 penny, 1/240th of a pound sterling at the time, could get your letter sent anywhere in the United Kingdom -- made the mailing, and thus the popularization, of Christmas cards possible.

At any rate, here's a picture of the very first Christmas Card. Note that a woman is feeding a child a glass of wine.
December 25, 1847: "Minuit, Chretiens" debuts, written in French by Adolphe Adam. In 1855, Unitarian minister John Sullivan Dwight wrote English lyrics, making it "O Holy Night."

In 1973, Harry Chapin would write "Mr. Tanner," and his bass guitarist, John Wallace, would sing the song as the title character -- as Harry wrote, "He did not know how well he sang, it just made him whole" -- even though the song "Mr. Tanner" makes no mention of Christmas itself.

December 25, 1849, 170 yeares ago: James Rees, a Christian missionary from Philadelphia, publishes the short story "A Christmas legend." This is the 1st literature to explicitly say that Santa Claus has a wife.

Two years later, the Yale Literary Magazine printed a story that gives Mrs. Claus a name -- sort of. She's listed as simply "Mrs. Santa Claus." In 1889, Katharine Lee Bates, composer of "American the Beautiful," published the poem "Goody Santa Claus On a Sleigh Ride" -- "Goody" being short for "Goodwife," an old New England term with the same meaning as "Mrs." This fleshed out her character as a bespectacled, chubby old woman -- essentially, a feminine, beardless, but otherwise physical match for her husband.

She has since become part of the legend, helped by the Rankin-Bass TV specials, from 1964 and Rudolph onward. Yet she is rarely given a first name. In Rankin-Bass' 1970 special Santa Claus Is Comin' to Town, she was named Jessica. In 1985's Santa Claus: The Movie, she was Anya, suggesting an Eastern European origin, tying in with the fact that much of the Santa legend comes from tales from Russia. In the 2011 animated Arthur Christmas, she was Margaret.

December 25, 1852: Henry Tifft Gage is born in Geneva, in Central New York, grows up in Saginaw, Michigan, and becomes a lawyer in California. He was the State's Governor at the turn of the 20th Century, serving from 1899 to 1903, as a Republican. This included the founding of baseball's Pacific Coast League. He died in 1924.

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December 25, 1865: Fay Templeton (apparently, her entire name) is born in Little Rock, Arkansas. She was a prominent American stage actress of the turn of the 20th Century.

December 25, 1868: In one of his last official acts as President, Andrew Johnson pardons all Confederate soldiers from the American Civil War, for any crimes they may have committed against the United States.

This date is also the Christmas debut of "O Little Town of Bethlehem," written by Phillips Brooks, then rector of the Church of the Holy Trinity in Philadelphia.

December 25, 1870: This was the 1st year in which December 25 was officially a federal holiday in America, thanks to a bill passed by Congress, and signed into law by President Ulysses S. Grant.

Also on this day, Chaja Rubinstein is born in Krakow, Poland. Better known as Helena Rubinstein, she becomes a cosmetics tycoon, and lives on until 1965. Those of us who grew up on PBS' childrens' programming in the 1970s and '80s know her name from the Helena Rubinstein Foundation, which contributed funding for Sesame Street, The Electric Company, et al.

December 25, 1876: Muhammad Ali Jinnah is born in Karachi, British India. He becomes the founder of the nation of Pakistan in 1947, but lives only a year after its establishment.

December 25, 1878: Louis Chevrolet is born in La Chaux-de-Fonds, Switzerland. A pioneer of auto racing, he founded the car company that bears his name. Which may also make his company the source of Eartha Kitt's Christmas 1953 request: "Santa baby, a '54 convertible, too, light blue." He did not live to hear that song, dying in 1941.

December 25, 1884: Evelyn Nesbit is born outside Pittsburgh in Tarentum, Pennsylvania. She became a popular Broadway actress after getting on the "casting couch" of architect, and friend of theater producers, Stanford White.

After marrying playboy Harry Thaw, a fellow Pittsburgher, she saw Thaw murder White, in the roof garden of the second Madison Square Garden (which White had designed), on June 25, 1906, resulting in "the Trial of the Century," making her the most familiar woman in America thanks to the era's "yellow journalism."


Her life was a disaster after that. Before her death in 1967, she said of the only man she truly loved, "Stanny White died. My fate was worse: I lived."


December 25, 1887: Conrad Nicholson Hilton is born in Socorro County, New Mexico Territory -- it wouldn't become a State until 1912. Sadly, the hotel icon, who lived until 1979, is now best known for his socialite great-granddaughters, Paris and Nicky. He was recently played by Chelcie Ross on Mad Men. (You may also remember Ross as Eddie Harris, the hypocritical grizzled veteran pitcher in Major League.)

Also on this day, Glenfiddich single malt Scotch whiskey is first produced. Merry Christmas, indeed. Of course, this may also bring us back to the subject of the Hilton sisters.


December 25, 1889, 130 years ago: Lila Bell Acheson is born in Virdon, Manitoba, Canada. In 1921, she married DeWitt Wallace, born 6 weeks before she was. In 1922, they founded Reader's Digest magazine. He lived until 1981, she until 1984.

December 25, 1890: Oklahoma Territorial Agricultural and Mechanical College is founded in Stillwater, a year after the former Indian Territory was taken over and settled by white people. In 1907, with the coming of Statehood, it became Oklahoma A&M. In 1958, the name was changed to Oklahoma State University.

The school was known for a basketball team that won the 1944 and 1945 National Championships under coach Henry Iba, and for building perhaps the greatest college wrestling program. Its football team has been considerably less successful.

OSU athletes have included: Baseball players Allie Reynolds, Joe Horlen, Jerry Adair, Gary WArd, Robin Ventura, Mickey Tettleton, Pete Incaviglia, Jeromy Burnitz, Matt Holliday, Josh Fields, and Boston Red Sox manager John Farrell; football players Sonny Keys, Walt Garrison, Jim Turner, Jerry Sherk, Dexter Manley, Thurman Thomas, Heisman Trophy winner Barry Sanders, Leslie O'Neal, Charlie Johnson, Jason Gildon and Dez Bryant, and coach Buddy Ryan (Rex' father); basketball players, Bob Kurland, John Starks, Bryant Reeves and Joey Graham, Kansas coach Bill Self, and Don Haskins, coach of the 1966 National Champion Texas Western (now Texas-El Paso) team; and the current wrestling coach, Olympic Gold Medalist John Smith. And, if you count golf, Bob Tway, Rickie Fowler and Scott Verplank.

Other alumni include: Oklahoma Senators Henry Bellmon, Don Nickles and Tom Coburn; Governors Bellmon and Mary Fallin; astronaut Stuart Roosa; oilman T. Boone Pickens, who donated enough money to the school to get the football stadium named after him; law professor and political figure Anita Hill; Dick Tracy creator Chester Gould; singers Hoyt Axton and Garth Brooks; and actors Gary Busey and James Marsden. It's also the alma mater of fictional character Ellie Bishop, part of the Special Agent team on CBS' drama NCIS.

Also on this day, Robert LeRoy Ripley is born in Santa Rosa, California. Yes, he was born on a Christmas Day – believe it or not!

Actually, a lot of the items he put in Ripley's Believe It Or Not were stone-cold lies that put in because he just plain liked them.  But some of them were true. He died in 1949.

December 25, 1892:The Nutcracker Suite premieres at the Imperial Maliinsky Theatre in St. Petersburg, Russia the preceding week, December 18. The ballet, with music by Pyotr Tchiakovsky and a libretto and choreography by Marius Petipa, tells a Christmastime story of little Clara Stahlbaum, her doll, and a prince cursed to live as a nutcracker.

"The March of the Toy Soldiers," "The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy," and "The Dance of the Reed Flutes" have all become part of the lexicon of Christmas music.

Due to the fantasy nature of the story, most film versions have been animated: 1979 (stop-motion), 1988 (using the Care Bears as characters), 1990, 2001 (using the Barbie doll in place of Clara) and 2007 (with cartoon legends Tom and Jerry).

A live-action version was done in 2010 with Elle Fanning as Clara, and lyrics to Tchaikovsky's songs by Tim Rice, but it bombed. In 2018, Disney (which had used some of the music in Fantasia in 1940) released The Nutcracker and the Four Realms, moving the action to London, and starring Keira Knightley, Helen Mirren, Morgan Freeman, and Mackenzie Foy as Clara.

December 25, 1895: The legend of "Stagger Lee" is born -- and it is definitely not a song of holiday cheer. Lee Shelton, a black pimp known as "Stack" or "Stacker" Lee, ran an, um, entertainment venue called the Four Hundred Club in St. Louis. He and William Lyons, also involved in the St. Louis underworld, were drinking in the Bill Curtis Saloon. They began to argue, and Lyons took Shelton's Stetson hat off his head. For this offense, Shelton shot Lyons, killing him. Shelton was convicted, served 12 years for murder, was imprisoned again for robbery, and died in prison in 1912.

As early as 1897, during Shelton's trial, the 1st song about the murder was performed. It spread throughout American music, black and white alike, and, depending on the singer's accent, the perpetrator (and thus the title) could be "Stack-o-Lee,""Stag-o-Lee,""Stacker Lee,""Stagger Lee," and so on. The legendary New Orleans pianist Mac "Dr. John" Rebennack claimed that there were so many versions, he could sing the song for half an hour and never repeat a verse.

Eventually, "Stagger Lee" became the best-known version of the man's name. But the song, as most people know it now, gets the details wrong: In most versions, "Stagger Lee" and "Billy" are shooting dice in an alley late at night, and Billy, having already won all of Stagger Lee's money and Stagger's brand-new Stetson hat, tries to cheat him. So Stagger Lee goes home, gets his gun, goes to the bar, and, despite Billy pleading for his life -- "I got three little children and a very sickly wife" -- shoots him.

Fred Waring & His Pennsylvanians became the 1st white act to record it, in 1923. Lloyd Price hit Number 1 with it in 1959, but there was a problem: It was on ABC-Paramount Records, and ABC not only owned the label, but aired American Bandstand. That show couldn't have the Number 1 song in the country played for teenagers, on live national daytime television, with the words, "Stagger Lee shot Billy, oh, he shot that poor boy so bad, 'til the bullet came through Billy and it broke the bartender's glass!" (How did that lyric get past 1950s censors in the first place?)

So they had Price record a cleaned-up version, in which Stagger Lee and Billy aren't gamblers with guns, but friends, until Billy stole Stagger Lee's girlfriend, but he feels bad and gives her back, and the guys make up, and are both alive at the end.

The way to tell the difference at the beginning: In the original version, Price begins the song singing, in his New Orleans accent, "The night was Claire"; while in the cleaned-up version, he sings it straight, "The night was clear." In both versions, "and the Moon was yellow, and the leaves came tumbling down." (It's a haiku: Five syllables, seven, five.)

December 25, 1897: Actually, the "Yes, Virginia" editorial was published in the New York Sun on September 21 of this year. Laura Virginia O'Hanlon was then 8 years old. She married briefly, keeping the name Laura Douglas after her divorce. She had a daughter with her brief husband, got a doctorate from Fordham University, taught in New York's public schools from 1912 to 1935, was a principal from then until 1959, and lived on until 1971, always answering letters from kids who asked about the story.

December 25, 1899, 120 years ago: Humphrey DeForest Bogart is born in Manhattan. Listen, sweetheart, if you don't show some Christmas spirit, you'll regret it. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon, and for the rest of your life.

Bogie died from smoking in 1957, but he may still be the most beloved actor in American history.  "Here's looking at you, kid."


Also on this day, Woolwich Arsenal travel to Lincoln City, and lose 5-0.

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December 25, 1900: Albert J. Trace is born in Chicago. A musician who played minor-league baseball, he wrote songs with his brother Ben Trace, including "You Call Everybody Darlin'" and "If I Knew You Were Comin' I'd've Baked a Cake." He died in 1993.

December 25, 1901: 
Alice Christabel Montagu Douglas Scott is born at Montagu House in Central London. The daughter of Scotland's largest landowner, the 7th Duke of Buccleuch, she married Prince Henry, Duke of Gloucester and son of King George V.

This made her the mother of Prince Richard, the current Duke of Gloucester -- a title once held by the villainous King Richard III -- and the sister-in-law of Kings Edward VIII and George VI, and an aunt of Queen Elizabeth II. One of several long-lived women in the House of Windsor, she lived until October 29, 2004, nearly 103.

December 25, 1902: Barton MacLane (no middle name) is born in Columbia, South Carolina. Like Bogie, he developed a reputation for playing tough guys, especially cowboys and cops. He died in 1969.

December 25, 1907: Cabell Calloway III is born in Rochester, New York. "Minnie the Moocher" is not exactly a Christmas carol, but on December 25, Cab Calloway might've sung it, "Hi-de-hi-de-hi-de-ho-ho-ho!" The jazz legend of the 1930s, introduced to a new generation in the 1980 film The Blues Brothers, died in 1994.

December 25, 1908: 
Denis Charles Pratt was born in Sutton, Surrey, England, outside London. He was better known as the author Quentin Crisp. He lived until 1999.

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December 25, 1913: Alvin Morris is born in San Francisco. Known professionally as singer and actor Tony Martin, he starred on the Burns & Allen radio show, and married Alice Faye and Cyd Charisse. He and Charisse were married from 1948 until she died in 2008. He died in 2012.

December 25, 1914: Upon hearing German soldiers sing Christmas carols in their trench on the Western Front of what was then called The Great War (later World War I), the British soldiers start to do so in theirs. Soon, the men on both sides come out of their trenches, and stop treating each other as enemies for a few hours, exchanging food, drinks, and trinkets. It becomes known as the Christmas Truce.


Legend has it that there was even a soccer game. Sorry, forgot to "speak English" there: A football match. It's not clear which side produced the ball, but according to most accounts that discuss the match, the Germans beat the English, 3-2.


This is the 1st time that Englishmen would be defeated by Germans at their national game. There have been many more. But, as England manager Alf Ramsey pointed out before the 1966 World Cup Final, twice in the 20th Century, the English (well, the British, and their allies) would beat the Germans at their 
national game (war), and on their soil no less.

Military historian Andrew Robertshaw (a technical advisor for the film version of the World War I story War Horse) says such a truce would have been unthinkable a year later: "This was before the poisoned gas, before aerial bombardment. By the end of 1915, both sides were far too bitter for this to happen again."


In 1997, Garth Brooks and Joe Henry wrote a song titled "Belleau Wood" for Brooks' album Sevens.  It describes a Christmas truce between American and German soldiers at Belleau Wood in 1917. But this is fiction, as the battle of Belleau Wood took place in June 1918, in Aisne, Picardy, France.


December 25, 1916: 
Ahmed Ben Bella is born in Maghnia, in what was then French Algeria. He served in the French Army during World War II, and was personally decorated by Charles de Gaulle. But France's abuses in his homeland led to his joining the resistance, and in 1954 to the Algerian War, a bitter period for both sides.

Independence was achieved in 1962, and he was elected the country's 1st President in 1963, but was deposed and imprisoned in 1965. He essentially lived under house arrest until 1980, and remained leader of one political party or another until 1997, opposing one tyrannical government after another. He lived until 2012.  

December 25, 1917: 
Arseny Mironov (no middle name) is born in Vladimir, Russia. He designed planes for the Soviet Union during World War II, and was still active in flight direction in 1985. He died on July 3, 2019, age 101.

December 25, 1918: 
Muhammad Anwar e-Sadat is born in Monufia, in what was then the Sultanate of Egypt. He was an officer that participated in the Egyptian Revolution of 1952, overthrowing King Farouk and installing Gamal Abdel Nasser as military dictator. He became part of Nasser's Cabinet in 1954, served as Vice President briefly in 1964, and was named Vice President again in 1969. When Nasser died on September 28, 1970, Sadat became President.

He was the leading figure against Israel in the Yom Kippur War of October 1973, but lost. His brother Atef Sadat, a pilot, was killed. This seems to have changed him: Not only did he begin to reform Egypt domestically, making the nation more free than it had ever been, but by 1977 he was making overtures to Israel for a permanent peace between their nations.

With the assistance of President Jimmy Carter, Sadat and Prime Minister Menachem Begin signed the Camp David Accords on September 17, 1978. That peace has now held for 40 years, and he and Begin won the Nobel Peace Prize for it. But, as he well knew he might, he paid for it with his life, being assassinated at a military parade in Cairo on October 6, 1981, the 8th anniversary of the start of the Yom Kippur War. He was 62. 

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December 25, 1924: Submitted for your approval: Rodman Edward Serling is born in Syracuse, New York, and grows up in Binghamton. Rod Serling died in 1975, at age 50, from smoking-induced heart attacks. But he hopes you have a Merry Christmas. He sends you this greeting… from The Twilight Zone. (His opinion of the "Twilight Saga" books and films is unrecorded.)

Also on this day, Atal Bihair Vajpayee is born in Gwalior, in what is now the State of Madhya Pradesh, India. He served as his country's Prime Minister from 1998 to 2004, including its entry into "the Nuclear Club." He died in 2018, at age 93.

December 25, 1925: Carlos Castaneda (no middle name) is born in Cajamarca, Peru. The anthropologist and author lived until 1998.

December 25, 1926: Emperor Yoshihito of Japan dies of a heart attack, brought on by pneumonia. He was only 47. He is succeeded by his son, who becomes Emperor Hirohito.


December 25, 1928: Nellie Elizabeth McCalla is born in Pawnee City, Nebraska, and grows up in Iowa. Known professionally as Irish McCalla, she was a model, one of pinup artist Alberto Vargas'"Varga Girls." She got into movies in the early 1950s, and in the 1955-56 season starred in Sheena, Queen of the Jungle. By her own admission, "I couldn't act, but I could swing through the trees."

She left acting for art, her last role being on an 1963 episode of 77 Sunset Strip, and became an accomplished painter. But her status as an action-adventure hero -- the only female one on TV in those days -- kept her in demand at nostalgia and sci-fi/fantasy conventions. She died in 2002.


Also on this day, Walter Earl Brown is born in Salt Lake City. He wrote songs for TV shows in the 1960s and '70s, including "If I Can Dream" for Elvis Presley's 1968 NBC "Comeback Special." He died in 2008.


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December 25, 1931: This is the 1st Christmas with a Christmas tree in Rockefeller Center in New York, even though the project is still under construction. 30 Rockefeller Plaza -- a.k.a. 30 Rock, and known as the RCA Building, then the GE Building from 1988 to 2015, and now the Comcast Building -- opened on May 1, 1933, and the Rockefeller Center Skating Rink in 1936. The tree has been placed between 30 Rock's front entrance and the Rink ever since.

The tree is usually a Norway Spruce, nearly always cut from somewhere in New York State, and tends to rise to between 70 and 100 feet. It is decorated only with lights, not "ornaments" as we now understand that term. With 30 Rock's most famous tenant being NBC, the tree-lighting ceremony, presided over by the Mayor of New York, was televised locally beginning in 1951 and nationally since 1997.

Also on this day, Arsenal travel to Yorkshire, and lose to Sheffield United 4-1 at Bramall Lane. They go on to a dubious near-Double, finishing 2nd in the League and losing the FA Cup Final.

December 25, 1932: King George V delivers a Royal Christmas Message to the British Empire, broadcast live over the BBC and its Worldwide Service, thus beginning a tradition.

Also on this day, Mabel Elizabeth Washington is born in Charleston, South Carolina. We knew her as Mabel King -- although, as an American, it is a little odd that she went from being named Washington to being named King. Then again, it would have been even odder had her birthday been not Christmas but the 4th of July.

She played Mabel Thomas, a.k.a. Mama, on What's Happening!! and Evillene the Witch in The Wiz. She died in 1999.

December 25, 1934: The film Babes In Toyland, based on Victor Herbert's 1903 operetta of the same title, premiered on November 30, and it has become a Christmas classic. It stars the great comedy team of Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy, and is also known, due to a scene in it mimicking one in The Nutcracker Suite, as March of the Wooden Soldiers

December 25, 1935: Anne Roth is born in Manhattan. We know her as Anne Roiphe, a novelist whose works include the "feminist classic" Up the Sandbox, published in 1970. She is still alive.

Also on this day, Sadiq al-Mahdi is born in Al-Abasya, Sudan. He was twice his country's Prime Minister, from 1966 to 1967 and again from 1986 to 1989. He is still alive.


December 25, 1936: Alexandra Helen Elizabeth Olga Christabel Windsor is born in Belgrave Square, West London. She is the daughter of Prince George, Duke of Kent, and thus a niece of King George VI. Thus also a 1st cousin of Queen Elizabeth II.

She served as one of the future Queen's bridesmaids when she married Prince Philip in 1947. She later married a son of the Earl of Airlie, and became known as Princess Alexandra, The Honourable Lady Ogilvy. She is still alive.

December 25, 1937: Arturo Toscanini conducts the NBC Symphony Orchestra on radio for the 1st time, beginning an iconic tenure that lasts 17 years. His selections on this night include works by Antonio Vivaldi, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, and Johannes Brahms.

Also on this day, Newton Baker dies of a cerebral hemorrhage in the Cleveland suburbs. He was 66 years old. He was Mayor of Cleveland from 1912 to 1915. He served as Secretary of War under President Woodrow Wilson from 1916 to 1921, including the entire U.S. contribution to World War I. At 44 at the time of his appointment, he was the youngest member of the Cabinet.

He was so well-regarded that subsequent Republican Presidents Calvin Coolidge and Herbert Hoover crossed party lines to appoint him to commissions. He was seriously considered as a candidate for the Democratic nomination for President in 1932, but refused to run, preferring to work, successfully as it turned out, for the nomination of Governor Franklin D. Roosevelt of New York, whom he had known as Wilson's Assistant Secretary of the Navy. A law firm he founded, Baker Hostetler, is still considered one of the top firms in America.

Also on this day, O'Kelly Isley Jr. is born in Cincinnati. A very different kind of musical legend from Toscanini, he was the eldest of the singing Isley Brothers, he grew up and go their start in Teaneck, Bergen County, New Jersey -- eventually starting T-Neck Records.

He and his brothers Ronald and Rudolph (no, he wasn't born on Christmas, and didn't have a red nose) wrote "Shout!" (As in, "We-e-e-e-e-e-ll... You know you make me wanna shout!") They also wrote "Nobody But Me" (as in, "No no, no, no no, no no no no no... Nobody can do the shing-a-ling! like I do... "), which didn't chart for them, but became a hit a few years later for a Cleveland-based band called the Human Beinz. O'Kelly died in 1986, Ronald is now 78, and Rudolph (Isley, that is, not the reindeer) is 80.

December 25, 1938: Karel Capek dies of pneumonia in Prague, in what was then Czechoslovakia.  The science fiction pioneer was only 48. His 1922 play, Rossum's Universal Robots, contained the first published example of the use of the word "robot." He claimed the word was coined by his brother Josef, meaning "serf labor," essentially labor without any choice, as a robot could be programmed to do.

Karel had refused to leave his homeland after the Nazis annexed it, and this stress, combined with a spinal condition that made life very painful, may have contributed to his early death. Josef, a painter and a writer in his own right, didn't live much longer, as the Nazis sent him to the Bergen-Belsen concentration camp, where he died in 1945, age 58.   


December 25, 1939, 80 years ago: This was the 1st Christmas to feature Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. Robert L. May created the character, as an assignment for the retailer Montgomery Ward, based on Chicago. He was thinking about a Christmas-themed children's book that "Monkey Ward" could cheaply publish and sell, when a fog rolled in off Lake Michigan, but a ship's red light broke through it. He wrote the poem that became the song in anapestic tetrameter, because it was the same meter as Clement Clarke Moore's "A Visit from St. Nicholas."

The 1st mass-market edition was released in 1947, and that would also be the year that Gene Autry, the Singing Cowboy, recorded the song version. There have been new books about Rudolph, and at least 3 TV specials. Rudolph even got his own U.S. postage stamp in 2014, so, while, contrary to the 1947 version of Miracle On 34th Street, the U.S. Postal Service, and thus the U.S. federal government, does not officially recognize the existence of Santa Claus, they have honored both Santa and Rudolph with stamps.

The "eight tiny reindeer" are now nine in the public mind, to the point where, when Epic Rap Battles of History had Moses vs. Santa Claus right before Christmas 2012, rapper Snoop Dogg, playing Moses, tells Santa, played by ERB regular "Nice Peter" Shukoff, "It takes nine reindeers to haul your fat ass. You took the Christ out of Christmas, and just added more mass!"

Also on this day, Robert McElhiney James is born in Marshall, Missouri. A jazz pianist, Bob James has been repeatedly sampled by hip-hop performers, but is best known for his composition "Angela," which was taken as the theme song for the TV sitcom Taxi.

Bob James is still alive, and should not be confused with his contemporary, the saxophonist Bob James, who played on several hits, including Billy Joel's "Just the Way You Are."

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December 25, 1940: Pal Joey, a musical based on the novel by John O'Hara, premieres at the Ethel Barrymore Theatre at 243 West 47th Street in New York. It includes the songs "Chicago" and "Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered." It stars Gene Kelly, Vivienne Segal, June Havoc, Van Johnson and Stanley Donen.


It's better known for the 1957 film version, starring Frank Sinatra, Rita Hayworth and Kim Novak. In spite of Sinatra having done the best-known versions of both "My Kind of Town (Chicago Is)" and "Chicago (That Toddlin' Town)," the song "Chicago" in this musical is neither one of those.


The last surviving theatre built by the Shubert organization, the Ethel Barrymore is currently hosting The Inheritance, a play by Matthew Lopez, inspired by E.M. Forster's novel Howard's End.


Also on this day, Agnes Ayres dies of a cerebral hemorrhage. She was only 42, and had been one of the top actresses of the silent film era, starring opposite Rudolph Valentino in The Sheik and Son of the Sheik.

Also on this day, Peter Edward Brown is born in Ashtead, Surrey, England. A singer, and a cousin of actor Marty Feldman (What hump?), he once played with a Christmas theme and fronted a band he named Pete Brown & His Battered Ornaments.


He is best remembered for his collaborations with Jack Bruce, both in the band Cream and in Bruce's solo career. He and Bruce wrote "I Feel Free,""Sunshine of Your Love," and one of my favorite rock songs of all time, "White Room" -- which is definitely not to be confused with "White Christmas." He is still alive.


December 25, 1941: The British surrender Hong Kong to the Japanese, who had begun a siege of it on December 8, a day after bombing Pearl Harbor and other American targets in the Pacific region. The people of Hong Kong remembered it as "Black Christmas," and control would not return to Britain until August 30, 1945.

With China in control since July 1, 1997, the crushing of political demonstrations this year, and remembering its status as Britain's ally at the time and Japan's enemy at nearly all times, the "Black Christmas" continues.

Also on this day, Arsenal host Fulham and win 2-0, on goals by Kirchen and Lewis. Although both men's best years happened during The War (always Capital T, Capital W), Lewis would score twice to win Arsenal the 1950 FA Cup Final.

Also on this day, Katherine Kennicott Davis publicly debuts her song "Carol of the Drum." It would not be recorded until 1951, by the Trapp Family Singers -- the real-life version of the kids from The Sound of Music. The most familiar version would be made in 1958, by the Harry Simeone Chorale.

Also on this day -- or, at least, during this Christmas season -- Santa Claus appears on the cover of a comic book for the 1st time. It's Captain Marvel #19, with an issue date of January 1942, and it shows Santa on the back of Captain Marvel (usually known today as "Shazam"), with Mary Marvel flying beside them.
December 25, 1942: Françoise Dürr is born in Algiers, in what was then French Algeria. She was one of the top women's tennis players of the late 1960s and early 1970s, particularly in doubles. In singles, she won the 1967 French Open. She is still alive.

December 25, 1944, 75 years ago: Jonathan Edwards (no middle name) is born in St. Louis. In 1977, John Edwards became the lead singer of the soul group The Spinners. A stroke forced him to retire in 2000. Nevertheless, he is still alive.

December 25, 1945: W
ith World War II over and victory belonging to the Allies, a man for the future was born: Richard Keith Berman is born in Manhattan. Rick Berman became the keeper of the Star Trek flame after Gene Roddenberry died, until it was foolishly given to J.J. "Jar-Jar" Abrams. He is still alive.

Also on this day, David Noel Redding is born in Folkestone, Kent, England. Noel Redding was the guitarist for the Jimi Hendrix Experience. He died in 2003.

Also on this day, Gary Lee Sandy is born in Dayton, Ohio. Dayton is not far from Cincinnati, where he played radio station manager Andy Travis on WKRP in Cincinnati – not to be confused with country singer Randy Travis. Gordon Jump, who played station operator Arthur "Big Guy" Carlson, was also from Dayton, but no other castmember was from anywhere near Cincy. Sandy is alive.

December 25, 1946: L
egendary comedian W.C. Fields dies from the long-term effects of alcoholism. He was 66. In a 1941 film, titled Never Give a Sucker an Even Break after another quote of his, he said, "I was in love with a beautiful blonde once, dear. She drove me to drink. That's the one thing I am indebted to her for." This saying was eventually mixed up, and has become popularly known as, "'Twas a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the decency to thank her for it."

He might have agreed with quirky singer Jimmy Buffett, born James William Buffett on this same day in Pascagoula, Mississippi: "Some people claim that there’s a woman to blame, but I know it's my own damn fault."


December 25, 1947: This may be a landmark day in film history. As far as I know, this is the 1st time film companies premiered movies on Christmas Day, starting a tradition in which Jewish families would have something to do on a day when most places would be closed.


On this day, the biggest such film is The Road to RioOf the 7 "Road Pictures" starring Bob Hope, Bing Crosby and Dorothy Lamour, this was the most successful at the box office.

The day before was a landmark day in television history, featuring the 1st Christmas episode. At the dawn of the network TV era, many anthology shows were aired, because it was cheaper to have (mostly) unknown actors needing a quick buck than to have to pay regular performers star salaries.

On December 24, 1947, Kraft Television Theatre airs on NBC. Its installment is "The Desert Shall Rejoice," and is a modern retelling of the Nativity Story. In the American Southwest, A couple comes into a small hotel, Nick's Place, looking for a room. Nick says he hates Christmas, and is all booked up. He has a shed out back. The expectant wife goes into labor.

December 25, 1948: This was the year of the 1st Perry Como Christmas special, although, up until the 1960s, such TV shows weren't called "specials," they were called "spectaculars." (On the 1st episode of The Tonight Show, in 1954, original host Steve Allen explained to the audience, "It's not a 'spectacular.' It's going to be more of a 'monotonous.'"

Como's Christmas specials would be very popular, even after rock and roll replaced his crooning style as the dominant form of music. His last special would air in 1994, and he lived until 2001.

Actually on this day, Barbara Ann Mandrell is born in Houston. She, and her singing sisters Louise and Irlene, were country when country wasn't cool. And when it was.

December 25, 1949, 70 years ago: Leon Schlesinger dies of a viral infection at age 65. A film producer, he was a relative of the Warner Brothers, and founded their cartoon division, leading to Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, and all the others. Including Porky Pig. So he died on a Christmas Day. Dare I say it? I dare: "Abadee, abadee, abadee, aba, That's all, folks!"

Also on this day, Mary Elizabeth Spacek is born in Quitman, Texas. "Sissy" Spacek also sang country music, playing Loretta Lynn in the film version of Lynn’s memoir Coal Miner’s Daughter.

Also on this day, Mian Muhammad Nawaz Sharif is born in Lahore, Pakistan. Known as Nawaz Sharif, he has been his homeland's Prime Minister 3 times: 1990 to 1993, 1997 to 1999, and 2013 to 2017. He is still alive.


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December 25, 1950: Ian Hamilton, Gavin Vernon, Kay Matheson and Alan Stuart, students at the University of Glasgow, steal the Stone of Scone (that doesn't rhyme: It's pronounced "stoan of skoon"), a.k.a. the Stone of Destiny, a symbol of Scottish heritage, from the coronation chair at Westminster Abbey in London.

The klutzy Jocks broke the Stone in two. Incredibly, they managed to get the pieces back to Scotland. On April 11, 1951, the culprits were caught, and the Stone was returned to Westminster.

The Crown declined to prosecute the thieves, and so they got away with it. With some irony, Hamilton became a lawyer, and is still alive, age 94. He is the last survivor: Vernon and Stuart died in 2004. while Matheson, the only woman in the plot, died in 2013.

In 1996, the British government elected to keep the Stone in Scotland, until necessary to crown a new British monarch. So far, Queen Elizabeth II (whose mother was Scottish) remains on the throne, for nearly 68 years now, a record, and the Stone's transport back to Westminster has not been necessary.


Unfortunately for all of humanity, on the same day, Karl Christian Rove is born in Denver, and grows up to prove himself Christian, literally, in name only.


December 25, 1951: bomb explodes at the home of Harry T. Moore, President of the Florida branch of the NAACP, in Houston, Florida. Harry is killed instantly, at age 46. His wife Harriette is badly hurt as well, and dies of her injuries on January 3, 1952, age 49.

December 25, 1952: Carol Christine Hilaria Pounder is born in Georgetown, Guyana in South America. She became the actress CCH Pounder. (Like the Yankees' CC Sabathia, she does not use periods.) She played Dr. Angela Hicks on ER, Detective Claudette Wyms on The Shield, Caretaker Irene Frederic on Warehouse 13, and District Attorney Thyne Patterson on Sons of Anarchy. She now plays medical examiner Dr. Loretta Wade, a.k.a. "Miz Loretta," on NCIS: New Orleans.

And the Number 1 song in America is the original version of "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus," by Jimmy Boyd, then about to turn 14, much older than the character he's playing. Once married to "Batgirl" Yvonne Craig, and not to be confused with the actor of the same name who played J. Arthur Crank and Paul the Gorilla on The Electric Company, this Jimmy Boyd continued singing and doing standup comedy, often opening for the various members of the Rat Pack in Las Vegas, and died in 2009.

December 25, 1953: 
Carter Harrison Jr. dies in Chicago at age 93. The son of a Mayor, he was elected Mayor in 1897, 1901 and 1911. His tenure included the end of the era of Cap Anson as 1st baseman and manager of the team that became the Chicago Cubs, the turn of the 20th Century, and the birth and 1st Pennant of the Chicago White Sox.


December 25, 1954: Singer John Marshall Alexander Jr., a.k.a. Johnny Ace, kills himself while fooling around with a gun backstage at a concert at the City Auditorium in Houston. According to witnesses, he was not, as the legend says, playing Russian roulette, just goofing off, not intending to harm anyone, including himself. He was only 25.

Some have called him "the first dead rock star," although that title has also been given to country music icon Hank Williams, who died nearly 2 years earlier.


But the world of music breaks even, as Annie Lennox is born in Aberdeen, Scotland. With The Tourists, Eurythmics and on her own, she is one of the world's most beloved living singers.


Also on this day, Margaret Ann Williams is born in Kansas City, Missouri. She began her political career as an aid to Congressman Morris "Mo" Udall of Arizona, who finished 2nd to Jimmy Carter in the race for the 1976 Democratic Presidential nomination. Around here, she was an aide to Congressman, later Senator, Bob Torricelli of New Jersey.

She worked for the Children's Defense Fund, which was how she met Hillary Clinton, which was how she met Bill Clinton, which is how she got to be on his Presidential campaign staff in 1992. She joined Hillary's staff, and was alleged to have removed folders from the office of Deputy White House Counsel Vince Foster on the night of his suicide in 1993, in order to protect Bill and/or Hillary from suspicion. She has always denied this.

In 2008, she was Hillary's campaign manager in the Democratic Primaries. She is now a partner in Griffin Williams, a management-consulting firm.

December 25, 1955: Queen Elizabeth II delivers the 1st televised Royal Christmas Message, although it is in sound only, with only the royal coat of arms being seen by the television audience.


A couple of days before, Otis Blackwell, a black songwriter from Brooklyn, was walking in New York, with no money to buy Christmas presents for his family, or to get new shoes, and the ones he has on have holes in them, and it's cold and snowing.

He runs into a friend who works for a music publisher, who offers him $25 for any song he has. He has 6 written down on paper in his pocket, and hands them over. The man writes him a check for $150 -- about $1,440 in today's money. And if that had been the end of it, it would have been a great Christmas story.

That wasn't the end of it. A few weeks later, the friend calls and says that Elvis Presley is going to record one of the songs Otis gave him. Otis says that's nice. The friend says, "You don't understand: Elvis Presley!" Otis asks a question that, at the time, was still understandable outside the South: "Who the hell is Elvis Presley?" The friend says, "He's going to be the biggest thing ever in this business!" Otis says, "Okay, I've heard that before." The song was "Don't Be Cruel," and it was the biggest hit single of 1956.

Otis had another big hit in 1956, "Fever" by Little Willie John. Now, he could afford to rent an office to write songs. A friend came in one day, shaking a Coke bottle, and said, "Why don't you write a song called 'Shakeup'?" Otis immediately knew that this was a good idea for Elvis, and it became "All Shook Up."

He soon wrote 2 hits for Jerry Lee Lewis. No, not "Whole Lotta Shakin' Goin' On" -- that was by Dave "Curlee" Williams and Roy Hall -- but "Great Balls of Fire" and "Breathless.""Fever" was a hit again, for Peggy Lee. Otis had another Elvis hit with "Return to Sender." He died in 2002, age 71.

Also in 1955, but not on Christmas Day, C.S. Lewis published Xmas and Christmas: A Lost Chapter from Herodotus. It is a satire of the observance of two simultaneous holidays in "Niatirb" (that's "Britain" spelled backwards), from the supposed view of the ancient Greek historian Herodotus. He lived in the 5th Century BC, about 400 years before the Roman invasion of Britain, so this is a total fantasy.

One of the holidays, "Exmas," is observed by a flurry of compulsory commercial activity and expensive indulgence in alcoholic beverages. The other, "Crissmas," is observed in Niatirb's temples. Lewis' narrator asks a priest why they kept Crissmas on the same day as Exmas:

It is not lawful, O Stranger, for us to change the date of Crissmas, but would that Zeus would put it into the minds of the Niatirbians to keep Exmas at some other time or not to keep it at all. For Exmas and the Rush distract the minds even of the few from sacred things. And we indeed are glad that men should make merry at Crissmas; but in Exmas there is no merriment left.

And when Lewis/Herodotus asked the priest why they endured the Rush, the priest replied, "It is, O Stranger, a racket... "


December 25, 1957: Charles Pathé, a pioneer in film and recorded sound, dies in Monaco, one day short of his 94th birthday.

The films premiering on this day include Old YellerNice movie to take the family to on Christmas, right?

Also on this day, 
Queen Elizabeth II appears on television to deliver the Royal Christmas Message. Previously, she had only been heard, not seen, even in the TV broadcast. She continues to appear onscreen every Christmas Day, albeit on tape delay.


Also on this day, Shane Patrick Lysaght MacGowan is born in Pembury, Kent, England. His Irish parents took him back to Tipperary, before returning to London when he was 6 years old. In 1982, he founded The Pogues, an anglicisation of the Gaelic insult, "póg mo thóin," meaning "kiss my ass."

He and bandmate Jem Finer wrote "Fairytale of New York," and released it in 1987. It's a duet between Shane and British singer Kirsty MacColl. Not a hymn by any stretch of the imagination.

While Shane has beaten heroin addiction, with help from fellow Irish rocker Sinéad O'Connor, he remains a heavy drinker, and has had great difficulty getting around since a 2015 incident in which he fell and broke his pelvis. Sadly, Kirsty was killed in a boating accident in 2000. She was only 41.


December 25, 1958: Bell, Book and Candle premieres. A movie about a witch, premiering on Christmas Day?

Also on this day, Alannah Myles (no middle name) is born in Toronto. Essentially a one-hit wonder, the singer of the 1990 Number 1 hit "Black Velvet" has suffered nerve damage and has difficulty moving, but she still records. She says "medical marijuana" has helped her condition.

Also on this day, Cheryl Hudock (no middle name) is born in Manville, Somerset County, New Jersey. She uses her married name, Cheryl Chase. You may not know her name, her face, or her real voice, but she's the voice of Angelica Pickles on Rugrats.

December 25, 1959
, 60 years ago: Michael Phillip Anderson is born in Plattsburgh, New York, not far from the Canadian border. He rose to the rank of Lieutenant Colonel in the U.S. Air Force, and flew on the Space Shuttle Endeavour in 1998. Unfortunately, he also flew on the Space Shuttle Columbia, and was 1 of the 7 astronauts killed on re-entry on February 1, 2003. He was only 43 years old.

*

December 25, 1961: If President John F. Kennedy is to be believed, Santa Claus delivered presents on this day. On the preceding October 28, JFK responded to a letter from 8-year-old Michelle Rochon of Marine City, Michigan. She had heard that the Soviet Union was going to test a 50-megaton atomic bomb above the Arctic Circle. She wrote to JFK, "Please stop the Russians from bombing the North Pole. Because they will kill Santa Claus." He wrote back:

Dear Michelle:

I was glad to get your letter about trying to stop the Russians from bombing the North Pole and risking the life of Santa Claus.

I share your concern about the atmospheric testing of the Soviet Union, not only for the North Pole but for countries throughout the world; not only for Santa Claus but for people throughout the world.

However, you must not worry about Santa Claus. I talked with him yesterday and he is fine. He will be making his rounds again this Christmas.

Sincerely,
JOHN KENNEDY

Interestingly, Kennedy's name was typed on the letter, rather than signed with a pen.

As of Christmas 2018, Michelle was still alive, age 65, using her married name, Michelle Phillips -- not to be confused with the singer and actress of the same name -- and still living in Marine City. In a 2014 interview, she said that, after the letter was published, she got thank-you letters from people claiming to be Santa Claus -- postmarked from all over the country.

"I don't know why it didn't hit me that there were all these different Santa Clauses," she said. "I just figured it was all the one Santa Claus." As the 1947 film Miracle on 34th Street suggested was possible, the federal government seemed to be recognizing Santa's existence: "I had proof there was a Santa Claus. The United States told me they talked to Santa Claus, and he was fine."

Also on this day, Owen Brewster dies of cancer at age 73. Governor of Maine from 1925 to 1929, and serving in both houses of Congress from 1935 to 1952, he was an ally of Red-baiting Senator Joseph McCarthy, and nearly as reckless with his charges. His challenges to industrialist and film producer Howard Hughes allowed for his corruption to be publicly revealed, ruining his career.

In the film The Aviator, starring Leonardo DiCaprio as Hughes -- and premiering on Christmas Day 2004 -- Brewster is played by Alan Alda, who once again plays a native of Maine, but one whose politics are diametrically opposed to those of his real-life self and those of Hawkeye Pierce.


December 25, 1962: The film version of Harper Lee's novel To Kill a Mockingbird premieres, starring Gregory Peck as Atticus Finch, and, in their film debuts, 10-year-old Mary Badham (sister of film director John Badham, and now an art restorer), William Windom, Alice Ghostley, and, as the mysterious Arthur "Boo" Radley, Robert Duvall, about to turn 32 but with a lot of stage work to his name.


December 25, 1963: Although it's not specified, a Christmas party could be the "Oh What a Night" that produced the Four Seasons song "December 1963," a Number 1 hit in March 1976. In real life, at Christmas '63, the Seasons -- Frankie Valli, Bob Gaudio, Nick Massi and Tommy DeVito -- had a hit with their version of "Santa Claus Is Comin' to Town."

This was also the year of A Christmas Gift for You, a.k.a. The Phil Spector Christmas Album, featuring several acts produced by Spector, including The Ronettes, whose lead singer, Veronica Bennett, was his girlfriend, and later wife, better known as Ronnie Spector.

Unfortunately, it was released on November 22, 1963, mere hours before President John F. Kennedy was assassinated, and didn't sell well in the dreariest Christmas season in American history. It would be "rediscovered" in the 1970s. David Letterman often brought Ronnie (by then free from Phil's evil clutches) or Darlene Love onto his show to sing selections from the album.

What Phil did to Ronnie, and other women, eventually landing him in prison for what could well amount to a life sentence, puts him in the same category as Ike Turner, Roman Polanski, Bill Cosby and others, where we ask the question, "Does the creator being a monster mean we have to stop enjoying his genius artwork?" 

December 25, 1964: The TV special version of "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" premiered on December 6, produced for CBS by Arthur Rankin Jr. and Jules Bass. They would produce many animated Christmas specials, some in the traditional cartoon format, some (like this one) with stop-motion animation. Rankin died in 2014, at age 89. Bass is still alive, at 84.


Johnny Marks, writer of the song, was enlisted to write new songs, the best-known of which became "Holly Jolly Christmas," sung by Burl Ives in character as the special's narrator, Sam the Snowman. Marks died in 1985, at 75; Ives in 1995, at 85.

The movies released on this day aren't exactly family-friendly. The Pleasure Seekers, essentially a remake of Three Coins in the Fountain, stars Ann-Margret. It is also the last film for Gene Tierney. And Sex and the Single Girl stars Natalie Wood and Tony Curtis. Wood plays a fictionalized version of Helen Gurley Brown, who wrote the book of the same title, published 2 years earlier.

December 25, 1965: The BBC airs a Christmas Day, and a Christmas-themed, episode of Doctor Who for the 1st time. It's still the First Doctor, William Hartnell, so there's no need to identify him by number.

The episode, "The Feast of Steven," takes place in 1921. The TARDIS arrives outside a police station, and hilarity ensues. They end up meeting Charlie Chaplin (M.J. Mathews), and Bing Crosby (Robert Jewell), whom The Doctor thinks will never make it as an entertainer, due to his "stupid name."

At the episode's conclusion, there is a toast to Christmas inside the TARDIS, and Hartnell turns to the camera and says, "Incidentally, a Happy Christmas to all of you at home."

December 25, 1967: Jason Matthew Thirsk is born in the Los Angeles suburb of Hermosa Beach, California. The bass guitarist for the punk band Pennywise, he fell victim to depression and alcoholism, and shot and killed himself in 1996, only 28 years old.

December 25, 1968
: The Apollo 8 astronauts become the 1st people of Earth to see the far side of the Moon. Upon seeing a phased Earth, appearing as the Moon usually does, from lunar orbit, the astronauts -- Bill Anders, Jim Lovell and Frank Borman -- take turns reading from the Bible, but the opening, the Creation story of Genesis, rather than the First Christmas story.

But all is not well on planet Earth. There was one last horrible moment in a horrible year. In what becomes known as the Kilvenmani Massacre, 44 Dalits -- known in the West as the Untouchables -- are burned to death in Kizhavenmani, Tamil Nadu, in retaliation for a campaign for higher wages by their laborers.

Also on this day, Helena Christensen (no middle name) is born in Copenhagen, Denmark. She is one of the most heralded models of the last 30 years.

December 25, 1969, 50 years ago: Baby's First Christmas. Well, mine, anyway. Not that I knew it.

Also on this day, a film version of William Faulkner's novel The Reivers premieres, a coming-of-age story set in 1905 Mississippi.

*

December 25, 1970:Santa Claus Is Comin' to Town first aired on December 13, 1970.

December 25, 1971: Dido Florian Cloud de Bounevialle O'Malley Armstrong is born in the Kensington section of London. Best known for her song "Thank You" and her guest appearance in Eminem's video "Stan," Dido also sang one of the sexiest songs I've ever heard, "Who Makes You Feel."

Also on this day, Justin Trudeau is born in Montreal to Canada's Prime Minister, Pierre Trudeau, and his much-younger wife Margaret. Two years later to the day, another son would be born to them, Alexandre Trudeau.


Both brothers would become journalists, and Justin now serves in Parliament, as Leader of the Liberal Party, his father did before him. On October 19, 2015, the Liberals were returned to power in a federal election, making Justin the Prime Minister, and making the Trudeaus Canada's 1st father-and-son national leaders since Britain's Kings George III and IV (and William IV, another son of George III).


December 25, 1972: Adrian Scott dies in the Los Angeles suburb of Sherman Oaks, California at age 60. The native of Kearny, Hudson County, New Jersey was a screenwriter, one of the "Hollywood Ten," blacklisted in 1947 for refusing to testify before the House Un-American Activities Committee, investigating Communist influence in the American film industry.


He produced 3 films directed by another of the Ten, Edward Dymytryk, all film noirs, including the 1944 film Murder, My Sweet. He had just begun to be credited under his own name again when he died, just barely beating the blacklist.

Also on this day, Johnny Mac Powell is born in Clanton, Alabama. The gospel singer, lead singer for the band Third Day, doesn't use his first name, and won the 2001 Gospel Music Association award for Male Vocalist of the Year.

December 25, 1973: The film The Sting premieres, starring Paul Newman and Robert Redford as con men in 1936 Chicago. The theme song is Marvin Hamlisch's arrangement of Scott Joplin's 1902 song "The Entertainer" -- although my mother and a lot of people in her generation still call the song "The Sting."

Also on this day, Magnum Force premieres, the 2nd film to feature Clint Eastwood as San Francisco Police Inspector "Dirty" Harry Callahan. I know what you're thinkin', punk: "Not a great holiday film for the whole family." So you gotta ask yourself one question: "Was I naughty or nice?" Well, which were ya, punk?

Also on this day, Match Game '73 airs an episode taped on December 14. Panelist Charles Nelson Reilly dresses up as Santa Claus, and does so every year through 1981, the last Christmas the show had. The exception was the December 23, 1977 edition -- the 25th was a Sunday that year -- because he was upset with CBS over some slight. For the episode taped to air on December 26, he dressed up.

Also on this day, Robert James Elliott is born in Newcastle-upon-Tyne, in the North-East of England. A left back, he starred for his hometown team, Newcastle United, and also played the 2006-07 season for their arch-rivals, Sunderland. Since 2009, he has worked with the United States Under-20 national team.

December 25, 1975: Two very different Boston legends are born. Hideki Okajima is a Japanese-born pitcher for the Red Sox, who helped them win the 2007 World Series.

And Rob Mariano is born in Canton, Massachusetts. "Boston Rob" continually wore a Red Sox cap while appearing on the CBS series Survivor, and ended up marrying his season's winner, Amber Brkich. Together, they went on to compete on another CBS series, The Amazing Race. They now live in Pensacola, Florida, and have 3 children, all girls.


Also on this day, the rock band Iron Maiden is formed. Not exactly a musical act one would associate with a Christian holiday. Lead guitarist Dave Murray and bass guitarist Steve Harris are 63. Guitarist and main songwriter Adrian Smith and original drummer Doug Sampson are 62. Original lead singer Paul Di'Anno and the most familiar lead singer for the band, Bruce Dickinson, are 61.


December 25, 1976: Armin Jozef Jacobus Daniël van Buuren is born in Leiden, the Netherlands. The DJ is one of the world's leading figures in "trance music." I am not a fan. 

December 25, 1977: Charlie Chaplin dies as a result of a stroke. The most renowned of all silent-film actors is truly silenced, at age 88.

Also on this day, as neither man's faith celebrates Christmas, Prime Minister Menachem Begin of Israel and President Anwar el-Sadat of Egypt meet in the latter's country, beginning the discussions that will lead to the Camp David Accords 9 months later.


Also on this day, High Anxiety premieres, Mel Brooks' spoof of Alfred Hitchcock's thrillers. Hitchcock, still alive at the time, not only liked it, but sent Mel a case of wine in appreciation.

Mel had previously spoofed Broadway musicals in The Producers (1968), Westerns in Blazing Saddles (1974), classic horror films in Young Frankenstein (also in 1974), and silent movies in Silent Movie (1976). He would later spoof historical epics in History of the World, Pt. 1 (1981), science fiction in Spaceballs (1987), Robin Hood films in Robin Hood: Men In Tights (1993), and vampire films in Dracula: Dead and Loving It (1995).

December 25, 1979, 40 years ago: Actress Joan Blondell dies of leukemia. She was 73, having been born on August 30, 1906 in New York, the same day and in the same city as my grandfather, George Goldberg, who later changed his name to George Golden. (His wife, my grandmother, Grace Darton, was born on the same day as actor Dennis Weaver, although not in the same city.)

As her name suggests, Blondell was a blonde, and is best remembered for her "gold digger" roles in early 1930s films, including the legendary Busby Berkeley production Gold Diggers of 1933, in which she sings "We're In the Money" and "Remember My Forgotten Man."


*


December 25, 1980: The film 
First Family premieres. Bob Newhart plays the President of the United States -- as if any man could get elected with a face like Newhart's, a bald head like Newhart's, and a name like Manfred Link. Madeline Kahn plays the alcoholic First Lady, and Gilda Radner plays their easy daughter.

Also on this day, Altered States premieres. It is the film debut of both William Hurt and Drew Barrymore. It is not a suitable film for Christmas viewing.

December 25, 1981: Willy Taveras -- apparently, his entire full name -- is born in Tenares, Dominican Republic. A center fielder, he reached the postseason with the 2004 and '05 Houston Astros, and the 2007 Colorado Rockies, playing in the 2005 and '07 World Series. In 2008, with the Rockies, he led the National League in stolen bases.

But he was one of these players who simply didn't get on base often enough to make his speed a useful weapon. Although he has kept his career going by playing in the Mexican and Dominican leagues, but hasn't appeared in Major League Baseball since 2010, with the Washington Nationals.

December 25, 1982: The 1st Aloha Bowl is played at Aloha Stadium in Honolulu, Hawaii. The University of Washington, then ranked Number 9 in the nation, defeats the University of Maryland, then Number 16, 21-20.

Honolulu had previously hosted the Poi Bowl from 1936 to 1939, and the Pineapple Bowl from 1940 to 1952, but those games were held on New Year's Day. The Aloha Bowl would be held on Christmas Day, and would feature a man in a Santa Claus suit parachuting onto the field to present the referee with the game ball. In 1991, the ABC sitcom Coach would feature a 2-part episode about the show's fictional Minnesota State University playing in the Pineapple Bowl on Christmas Day.

In 1998, 1999 and 2000, Aloha Stadium hosted a doubleheader, with the Aloha Bowl preceded by the Oahu Bowl. But that game quickly folded. The last Aloha Bowl was played in 2000. It was a commercial failure: Of the 19 games played, only the 1989 edition was a sellout of the 50,000-seat Aloha Stadium.

Having quickly gone from hosting 2 bowl games in 2000 to none in 2001, Hawaii tried again. The Hawaii Bowl was established in 2002, and was played on Christmas Day that year and the next, but has usually been played on Christmas Eve since. This year, it will be played on Christmas Eve, between Brigham Young University and an opponent to be determined.

Also on this day, Shawn Cornelius Andrews is born in Camden, Arkansas. A guard, he starred at the University of Arkansas, made 2 Pro Bowls with the Philadelphia Eagles, and played in Super Bowl XXXIX. He is a member of the Arkansas Sports Hall of Fame and the Eagles' 75th Anniversary Team. He played with the Giants in 2010, but a back injury soon ended his career.

December 25, 1983: Spanish artist Joan Miró dies of heart disease. He was 90. Yes, in the Spanish region of Catalonia, "Joan" is the masculine form of "John," so, unlike Joan Blondell, he was male.

December 25, 1984: Jack Balmer dies in Liverpool at age 68. A forward, he helped Liverpool F.C. win the Football League title in 1947.


Also on this day, Alastair Nathan Cook is born in Gloucester, England. I don't know what makes a cricket player great, but Cook holds the records for most caps (appearances) and most caps as Captain for the England national team. He was named International Cricket Council Player of the Year in 2011. He is 5th on the all-time list for most runs in Test cricket, with 12,472. (Sachin Tendulkar of India holds the record, with 15,921.)

He currently plays for Essex County Cricket. That's Essex County in England, not in New Jersey. England does have a city named Newark, but, unlike in New Jersey, it isn't in the County of Essex, but in the County of Nottinghamshire. However, he retired from international cricket before the 2019 Cricket World Cup, and was not a member of the England team that won it.

Also on this day, Limas Lee Sweed Jr. is born outside Houston in Brenham, Texas. A receiver, he was with the University of Texas when it won the 2005 National Championship, and the Pittsburgh Steelers when they won Super Bowl XLIII. He last played in 2012, with the CFL's Saskatchewan Roughriders.

Also on this day, Jessica Louise Orgliasso and Lisa Marie Origliasso are born in Albany Creek, Queensland, Australia. The twin sisters formed the singing duo The Veronicas.

December 25, 1987: Empire of the Sun premieres, a World War II story produced and directed by Stephen Spielberg.

Also on this day, Demaryius Antwon Thomas is born in Montrose, Georgia. A receiver, he was with the Denver Broncos when they won Super Bowl 50. Now with the Jets, the 5-time Pro Bowler has caught 722 passes for 9,735 yards and 62 touchdowns.

December 25, 1988: Eric Ambrose Gordon Jr. is born in Indianapolis. Named Indiana's "Mr. Basketball" in 2007, the guard played just 1 season at Indiana University before declared for the NBA Draft. It took a while to become a big pro player, including 3 years with the Los Angeles Clippers and 5 years with the New Orleans Pelicans, but in 2017, with the Houston Rockets, he was named NBA Sixth Man of the Year.

December 25, 1989, 30 years ago: Romanian dictator Nicolae Ceausescu is overthrown, in the latest chapter of the anti-Communist revolutions of Eastern Europe of that amazing year. He and his wife Elena are executed.

Also on this day, legendary Yankee manager Billy Martin is killed in a drunken-driving crash near his home in Johnson City, New York, outside Binghamton. He was 61.


Also on this day, Walter Ris dies in Mission Viejo, California, just short of his 66th birthday. A swimmer, the Chicago native won 2 Gold Medals for the U.S. at the 1948 Olympics in London. He is a member of the International Swimming Hall of Fame.

*

December 25, 1990: What would become known as the World Wide Web gets its 1st trial run.


Also on this day, The Godfather Part III premieres. Yes, that's what you want to do on Christmas Day: Go see a Mob movie. And, unlike the 1st 2 parts, which are beloved classics, the 3rd time was definitely not the charm.

Also on this day, Garrett Nicholas Cooper is born in Auburn, Alabama, where his father was teaching at Auburn University. His father later got a teaching job in Los Angeles, and that's where Garrett grew up, although he returned to Auburn to play baseball. He made his major league debut in 2017, as a 1st baseman for the Yankees, but has since been traded to the Miami Marlins.

December 25, 1991: Mikhail Gorbachev resigns as President of the Soviet Union. He had become the opposite of "a man without a country": He was, in effect, a one-man country. The next day, the Supreme Soviet dissolved, its last act being to dissolve the Soviet Union itself after 74 years.

Also on this day, Frank Finnigan dies of a heart attack in his hometown of Shawville, Quebec, a suburb of Canada's national capital, Ottawa, Ontario. He was 90 years old, and had lived long enough to see his efforts to get his former hockey team, the Ottawa Senators, restored to the NHL for the 1992 expansion, but not long enough to see them take the ice.

A right wing, he played the original Senators from 1923 to 1934, including being an integral part of their 1927 Stanley Cup win. Due to the Great Depression, the Senators did not play in the 1931-32 season, and the Toronto Maple Leafs were allowed to sign him, enabling him to win that season's Stanley Cup with the Leafs. He was the Senators' Captain upon their return. In the 1933-34 season, he played in the Ace Bailey Benefit Game in Toronto.

But after that season, they moved to St. Louis, already known for good support of a minor-league team. Finnigan scored the final goal in the history of the old Senators. The St. Louis Eagles were terrible in 1934-35 and folded, selling him back to the Leafs, for whom he played until 1937. He served in the Royal Canadian Air Force in World War II and managed hotels.

Finnigan was the last surviving Senator from the Stanley Cup winners of 1927 -- still the last Cup won by an Ottawa team -- and participated in the "Bring Back The Senators" campaign. On October 8, 1992, before their 1st regular-season home game, at the Ottawa Civic Centre, his Number 8 was raised to the rafters, and his son Frank Finnigan Jr. was invited to drop the ceremonial puck before the 1st home game.

His brother Eddie Finnigan also played in the NHL, including for the St. Louis Eagles after they were no longer the Senators, but was mostly a career minor-leaguer. His daughter Joan Finnigan was a noted Canadian writer, including writing a book about the Senators' re-establishment, and several books about the Ottawa Valley.

Also on this day, The Prince of Tides premieres. Barbara Streisand had long wanted to adapt Pat Conroy's novel, and does so as director, and stars along with Nick Nolte.

December 25, 1992
: Monica Dickens, great-granddaughter of Christmas champion Charles Dickens, and a best-selling author and broadcaster in her own right, dies at age 77.

Also on this day, Arin Gilliland (no middle name) is born in Lexington, Kentucky. Now using her married name of Arin Wright, she plays left back for the Chicago Red Stars of the National Women's Soccer League (NWSL). She is currently expecting her 1st child, and will likely miss the 1st half of the 2020 season on maternity leave.


Also on this day, Tanner Scott Rainey is born outside New Orleans in Folsom, Louisiana. He debuted with the Cincinnati Reds in 2018, making 8 appearances for them. He was a member of the Washington Nationals this past season, making 52 regular-season appearances, and entering 4 games of the World Series, which the Nats won.

Also on this day, Hoffa premieres, written by David Mamet, directed by Danny DeVito, and starring Jack Nicholson as Teamsters union boss Jimmy Hoffa. Although exactly what happened to him after he was last seen on July 30, 1975, in the parking lot of a restaurant in the Detroit suburbs, is still debated, the film suggests that he and an associate were shot and killed, and their bodies taken away.

Also premiering on this day is Trespass. As far as I know, this is is the only collaboration between rappers-turned-actors Tracy Marrow and O'Shea Jackson, a.k.a. Ice-T and Ice Cube.

December 25, 1993: The films Tombstone (centered on the 1881 Gunfight at the OK Corral), Philadelphia (about a man's fights with AIDS and the legal system) and Grumpy Old Men premiere.
At least the last of those has snow and comedy in it.

December 25, 1994, 25 years ago: As part of the annual NBA Christmas Day doubleheader (now a tripleheader), the Knicks beat the Chicago Bulls 107-104, in overtime at the United Center in Chicago. Of course, this was during Michael Jordan's hiatus...

Also on this day, the film I.Q. premieres. I would never have cast Walter Matthau as Albert Einstein, but he did a great job. The film was shot on location in Princeton, New Jersey, where Einstein lived the last 22 years of his life, teaching at the Institute for Advanced Study.

Meg Ryan plays his niece (a character made up for the movie), Tim Robbins plays the decidedly "town not gown" mechanic who falls for her before finding out who her uncle is, and famously bald actor Keene Curtis plays President Dwight D. Eisenhower.

There is a scene where Einstein is driving a Volkswagen Beetle convertible, with Little Richard's song "Tutti-Frutti" blasting out of the car radio. I don't think Einstein ever drove a car. If he did, I doubt it would be the Hitler-championed "People's Car," which was only beginning to become popular in America when Einstein died on April 18, 1955. "Tutti-Frutti" wasn't recorded until September 14, 5 months later. And, as a violinist trained on classical pieces, I doubt that Einstein would have had much use for rock and roll.


Also premiering on this day is a live-action version of Rudyard Kipling's The Jungle Book, starring Jason Scott Lee as Mowgli.


December 25, 1995: Dean Martin dies of emphysema at age 78. It is unfortunate that one of the leading singers of Christmas songs -- or "Christmas" songs, as I explained in my entry on Problematic Christmas Songs -- died on a December 25.

December 25, 1996: JonBenet Ramsey is found murdered at her home in Boulder, Colorado. She was 6. Her killer has never been definitively identified. Had she been born a few years later, she likely would have been a child beauty pageant opponent of Alana Thompson, a.k.a. Honey Boo Boo.

Also on this day, a pair of not-exactly-family-holiday-friendly films is released. John Travolta stars as Michael. As the tagline says, "He's an angel – not a saint." Boy, am I glad this film didn't come out when I was in school. It could have: Thanks to Welcome Back, Kotter, Saturday Night Fever and
Grease, Travolta was already a star.)

And Woody Harrelson stars in The People vs. Larry Flynt, while Richard Paul, a character actor who generally played chunky Southerners, but was one of the best impressionists of his time, plays the Rev. Jerry Falwell. This is a film in which a redneck porn mogul is the good guy, and one of America's most famous clergymen is the bad guy. Great holiday-season film for the whole family.

December 25, 1997: Denver Pyle, best known as Uncle Jesse on The Dukes of Hazzard, dies of lung cancer at the age of 77.

Also on this day, Bill Hewitt dies in Port Perry, Ontario at age 68. The grandson of sportswriter W.A. Hewitt and the son of sportscaster Foster Hewitt, he was a longtime TV voice of the Toronto Maple Leafs. As far as I know, the Hewitts are the only family with 3 generations in any sport's Hall of Fame.

Premiering on this day are the films As Good As It Gets, Jackie Brown, and a live-action version of Mr. Magoo, starring Leslie Nielsen. I am serious, and don't call me "Shirley."

Also premiering is The Postman, set in postapocalyptic Oregon in 2013. Twice before, Kevin Costner had demanded big funding and total control on a movie: On 1990's Dances With Wolves, and on 1995's Waterworld

Both of them, in reference to Heaven's Gate, a Western whose costs ran out of control and bankrupted United Artists in 1980, were nicknamed "Kevin's Gate." But Dances With Wolves was a home run (winning the Oscar for Best Picture), and Waterworld a single (despite its enormous cost, in made a profit).

This time, the man who starred in Bull Durham and Field of Dreams, and would later star in For Love of the Game and The Upside of Anger, strikes out: The Postman becomes one of the biggest bombs in film history. He has never recovered, and while he's made successful movies since, none have had him as the leading man.

December 25, 1998: Alec Baldwin hosts Saturday Night Live. He participates in the recurring sketch in which Ana Gasteyer and Molly Shannon play Margaret Jo McCullen and Teri Rialto, hosts of the fictional National Public Radio show The Delicious Dish. Baldwin plays noted baker Pete Schweddy, who has made a Christmas treat: Assortments of spherical treats made out of anything from meat to cake to candy. He calls them "Schweddy Balls," and sells them in a little bag he calls a "Schweddy Ball Sack."

The episode aired on December 12, 1998, just 1 week before President Bill Clinton (then played by Darrell Hammond) was impeached for... I don't know, something apparently worse than lying the nation into a war or stealing a Presidential election, with or without a foreign government's help.


The monologue shows Baldwin deciding that he can't do the show that night, because the whole impeachment saga is ruining his Christmas spirit. So John Goodman -- who, along with Steve Martin, appears to be in a running competition with Baldwin for the record for most SNL apperances outside of the regular cast -- plays the Ghost of Christmas Future.

He shows Baldwin what happens right before Christmas 2011: The host is Jimmy Fallon (a current castmember in 1998), and he's making fun of Baldwin. Goodman, prematurely aged, is shown as a current castmember. (It was possible: Billy Crystal and some others were regulars for a year after they'd already been big stars.) And the announcer was "Robot Dan Pardo," as it was presumed that the real Pardo, who'd been working for NBC since getting a radio job in 1938, wouldn't still be announcing at age 93. Anyway, it shocks Baldwin into going ahead with the show.

Unfortunately, also on this date, the aforementioned Richard Paul dies of cancer. He was only 58. Had he lived a little longer, he could have played a nasty Southern politician on The West Wing, the way he played a nice but clueless Southern Mayor on the sitcom Carter Country in the late 1970s, and a considerably smarter New England Mayor on Murder, She Wrote.

December 25, 1999
, 20 years ago: Galaxy Quest premieres. Tim Allen stars as an actor who starred in a 1970s science fiction TV show, playing the Captain of a starship and its heroic crew. The show-within-the-movie is obviously meant to be a parallel to Star Trek, and Allen's Jason Nesmith is a parody of the difficulties that people -- fans and co-stars alike -- have had with William Shatner.

But when the actors have to save an alien race for real... Let's just say that it's a better version of Star Trek than anything J.J. Abrams or CBS have done. It's also a better film, and a considerably less creepy one, than any of Allen's Santa Clause movies.

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December 25, 2001: The film Ali premieres, starring Will Smith as Muhammad Ali, depicting his life from the 1st time he wins the Heavyweight Championship of the World, in 1964 against Sonny Liston in Miami Beach, to the 2nd time he wins it, in 1974 against George Foreman in Zaire, and all the magic and all the madness in between.

Also on this day, Kate & Leopold premieres. Meg Ryan plays a New York advertising executive, and Hugh Jackman plays an 1876 British duke who inadvertently ends up in the present day.

December 25, 2002
: Catch Me If You Can premieres, starring Leonardo DiCaprio as 1960s con man Frank Abagnale, based on his memoir.

December 25, 2003:
 A new live-action version of Peter Pan premieres, starring Jeremy Sumpter. Also premiering is Cold Mountain, starring Jude Law as a soldier in the American Civil War, and Nicole Kidman as the woman he left behind.

Also on this day, UTAGE Flight 141, a Boeing 727-223 used by the national airline of the African nation of Guinea, crashes at Cotonou Airport in the nearby nation of Benin, killing 151 people.

December 25, 2004: Eddie Spicer dies in Rhyl, Wales at age 82. In 1939, the centreback signed for his hometown soccer team, Liverpool F.C., at just 17 years old. But World War II was underway, and he served in Britain's Royal Marines. He didn't make his official debut for the Mersey Reds until January 30, 1946, at 23.

In the 1946-47 season, he made 10 appearances for the club, which won the Football League title, but that was 1 game short of qualifying for a winner's medal under the rules of the time. He played for Liverpool in the 1950 FA Cup Final, but they lost to Arsenal. He broke his leg late in the next season, missing the entire 1951-52 season, and retired a year later, just 31.

Also on this day, The Aviator premieres. Yeah, that's what you want to do on Christmas Day: Go see a movie about a nut like Howard Hughes. Leonardo DiCaprio pulls it off, though.

Superbly bringing screen legends back to life are Katharine Hepburn by Cate Blanchett, Ava Gardner by Kate Beckinsale, and Jean Harlow by No Doubt singer Gwen Stefani. She may not be a hollaback girl, but she made a good throwback girl. As he did on M*A*S*H, Alan Alda once again plays a character from Maine, but, this time, it's Senator Owen Brewster, a nasty Republican who hauled Hughes before a Congressional hearing.

Another film premiering on this day is a live-action version of Fat Albert. Albert and the rest of the Cosby Kids are brought from cartoons into "the real world," and Albert (played by Kenan Thompson) meets his maker. No, he doesn't die: He meets Bill Cosby, who faints upon seeing him for the first time.

Of course, knowing what we now know about Cosby, it's hard to see him as either the creator of Fat Albert or Dr. Cliff Huxtable from The Cosby Show.

The cartoons featured a character named Dumb Donald, whose name was borrowed for questions on the CBS game show Match Game, after panelist Brett Somers objected to so many questions starting with, "Dumb Dora is so dumb!" (Followed by the audience yelling, "How dumb is she?") She wanted a masculine equivalent. Hence, "Dumb Donald" was allowed, since CBS also aired Fat Albert. In Match Game questions, Donald was usually depicted as a grown man (several questions mentioned his wife, and one involved him having a handlebar mustache), but his race was never specified.

When Match Game, which ran on CBS from 1973 to 1982, was revived on ABC in 2016, Dumb Dora was still used, but Dumb Donald was replaced by Dumb Derek -- despite the fact that the host was Alec Baldwin, who plays Donald Trump (who is so dumb) on Saturday Night Live. And Dumb Derek is gay. I'm not sure that's progress.

December 25, 2006: James Brown, the Godfather of Soul, dies of pneumonia. He was 73.

In the "Great holiday-season film for the whole family" department this was the premiere date for Black Christmas, Notes On a Scandal, and Children of Men. Okay, the last of these did feature the birth of a baby that signaled a new hope for humanity.

December 25, 2007: Jim Beauchamp dies of leukemia at age 68. An outfielder, he was named Most Valuable Player of the Texas League in 1963, but that success didn't carry over into the major leagues. He debuted with the St. Louis Cardinals in 1963, was part of the Houston Astros' youth movement in 1964 and '65, was with the Milwaukee Braves when they moved to Atlanta in 1966, was traded away by the Cincinnati Reds right before they started winning Pennants again, and finally saw the postseason with the Pennant-winning 1973 Mets.

He then managed in the minor leagues, and was promoted to bench coach by the Braves in 1991, a part of 5 World Series with them, winning in 1995. His hometown of Grove, Oklahoma named its baseball field for him while he as still alive and well enough to enjoy it. "Beauchamp" is French for "beautiful field."

Also on this day, The Bucket List premieres, a fun film, but a painful reminder that, someday, even Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman will die. 

December 25, 2008
: Eartha Kitt dies of cancer. The singer of "Santa Baby," and 1 of 3 women to play Catwoman on the 1960s Batman series, apparently had used up her 9th life, but what a life it was. She was 81.

Also on this day, a bunch of movies are released: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, starring Brad Pitt as a man who ages backwards; Marley & Me, about a man and his troublesome dog (not a retelling of the story of Ebenezer Scrooge and Jacob Marley); Valkyrie, about the plot to assassinate Adolf Hitler in 1944; and The Spirit, the 1st attempt to turn Will Eisner's early (1940-52) comic book hero into a live-action film, and it doesn't do well.

December 25, 2009
, 10 years ago: al-Qaeda operative Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, a 23-year-old native of Nigeria, tries and fails to detonate plastic explosives hidden in his underwear while on board Northwest Airlines Flight 253, going from Amsterdam, the Netherlands to Detroit. Because he failed, the plane landed safely, and all 289 people on board survived.

"The Underwear Bomber," having one of the most ridiculous nicknames of any criminal ever, is now surviving multiple life sentences at the "supermax" federal prison in Florence, Colorado.

Also on this day, Sherlock Holmes premieres, Guy Ritchie's retelling of Arthur Conan Doyle's legend, with Robert Downey Jr. as a Holmes who is impossible to be around, and more of a man of action, but still brilliant. Jude Law plays Dr. John H. Watson, and Rachel McAdams plays Irene Adler.

The villain is played by Mark Strong, previously in the film version of Fever PitchNick Hornby's memoir about being a fan of Arsenal. There is an inside joke: Among the villain's business holdings is the Woolwich Arsenal, the place where the team was founded in 1886. The film depicts Tower Bridge still under construction. It opened in 1894. 

*

December 25, 2011: Jimmy Fallon, now the host of NBC's Late Night (and, starting in 2014, NBC's The Tonight Show, taking the show back to its 1954-72 roots, in the same 30 Rockefeller Plaza building as SNL), hosts Saturday Night Live on December 17. And he makes jokes about Alec Baldwin. Who shows up. Just as that Christmas 1998 episode said would happen 13 years later.

The prophecy from 1998 doesn't fully come true, however: Don Pardo was still alive and announcing for the show. He died in 2014, at age 96, after 76 years of working for NBC, and was replaced as announcer by former castmember Darrell Hammond -- who had played Bill Clinton in that 1998 episode.

December 25, 2012: 
Quentin Tarantino's film Django Unchained premieres, reminding us of how bad slavery was. And a film version of the musical version of Victory Hugo's novel Les Misérables
premieres. More great entertainment for the family in the holiday season....

Also on this day, a Russian private jet, an Antonov An-72, crashes outside Shymkent, killing 27 people.

December 25, 2013: A man dressed as Santa Claus -- the brother of the husband of a friend of my sister's -- showed up at my sister's apartment, and presented my 6-year-old nieces Ashley and Rachel with new bicycles. They were so happy. This was the best Christmas ever!

Or it will be, until they can do something like that for their own children. Or even, God willing, before that can happen, they could help me do it for their cousin, my own as yet hypothetical child.

December 25, 2014: This was my 1st Christmas without my father. He was the hardest person in the family to shop for, but I'd take that problem in a heartbeat if it meant still having him around to shop for.

December 25, 2015: The Revenant premieres. This is the film that finally got Leonardo DiCaprio his Oscar for Best Actor. ("Finally"? He was 41 years old. Henry Fonda had to wait until he was 77 and dying.)

Also on this day, George Clayton Johnson dies in Los Angeles at age 86. He wrote the Twilight Zone episodes "Nothing in the Dark,""Kick the Can,""A Game of Pool" and "A Penny for Your Thoughts."

He also wrote the 1st episode of Star Trek that aired, "The Man Trap" (a.k.a. "The Salt Vampire"). He also wrote the story on which both versions of Ocean's Eleven were based, and, with William F. Nolan, wrote the novel Logan's Run, later turned into a sci-fi film and a short-lived TV series.

December 25, 2016: This was the 1st Christmas for my niece Mackenzie, born 7 months earlier. She was into it: She loved looking at Christmas trees, and other things with Christmas lights. On Christmas Eve, at a the United Methodist Church of Milltown, in Middlesex County, New Jersey, she made her acting debut, alongside Ashley and Rachel. All 3 played angels in a Christmas pageant.

Also on this day, a Russian Defense Ministry plane, a Tupolev Tu-154 (similar in design to the American L-1011 jet), en route from Sochi International Airport to Khmeimim Air Base in Syria,
crashes into the Black Sea shortly after takeoff.

All 92 people aboard are killed, including 64 members of the Alexandrov Ensemble, a.k.a. the Red Army Choir, who were going to the Russian army base in Syria to entertain the troops, on January 7, which is the day that the Russian Orthodox Church celebrates Christmas.

December 25, 2017: Ridley Scott's film All the Money In the World, about the 1973 kidnapping of oil heir J. Paul Getty III, premieres. Because of a sex scandal, Scott had to replace Kevin Spacey, whose scenes as Getty Sr. were already shot, with Christopher Plummer.

December 25, 2019: The world is a mess. Our country is a mess. The economy is getting dicey. Dictators are on the march all over the world. Not all of that, but a bit of it, is the fault of the #OrangeScrooge at the head of our government, and the people who still support him.

But Christmas is a day of new beginnings, of tolerance, of togetherness. Mackenzie, despite being just 3 1/2 years old, assisted my sister (her mother) and her sisters (now 12) in decorating the house, and was rightly proud of herself.

May your days be merry and bright. God bless us, every one. Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night. Sleep in heavenly peace.

Tales of Christmas Past -- Fictional Ones

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There's early in history, and then there's early in history. Both Hercules: The Legendary Journeys and its companion series Xena: Warrior Princess had Christmas episodes, despite taking place centuries before the birth of Christ. Hercules' episode, "A Star to Guide Them," was an allegory about the Nativity story and King Herod's order of "The Slaughter of the Innocents."

Xena's series was frequently much darker than Hercules', but "A Solstice Carol," full of references to things that would become associated with Christmas in the 19th and 20th Centuries A.D., was really, really campy. And yet, as a story, it works very well.


Both stories were set around the time of the Winter Solstice, which falls on December 21 or 22 -- which is possibly the reason that the early Church set Christmas on December 25, given the difference between the Julian Calendar then in effect and the Gregorian Calendar being used now.

December 25, 1183: Not the best of Christmases for the 50-year-old King Henry II of England, his Queen Eleanor of Aquitaine, and their sons, the princes Richard, Geoffrey and John. 

The film is The Lion In Winter, and they are played by the following: Henry by Peter O'Toole, Eleanor by Katherine Hepburn, the future King Richard I (the Lionhearted) by Anthony Hopkins in his 1st major film role, Geoffrey by John Castle (not to be confused with Godfather actor John Cazale), and the future Magna Carta signer King John by Nigel Terry (who would play a much better King of England, Arthur, in Excalibur).

On an episode of The West Wing, President Jed Bartlet (Martin Sheen) confirms that this is his favorite movie of all time. Though, uncharacteristically, the New Hampshire professor turned head of state gets Henry's quote wrong: In the film, it's, "I've snapped and plotted all my life. There's no other way to be alive, King, and 50 all at once."


December 25, 1842: In London, moneylender Ebenezer Scrooge has a change of heart. Instead of treating it with a cry of "Bah, humbug!" he accepts Christmas the way those around him do, with the words of his employee Bob Crachit's small, handicapped son Tim: "God bless us, every one!" The story is A Christmas Carol, by Charles Dickens.

Some may say Scrooge was corrupted by socialistic thoughts. Well, he didn't follow the suggestion of Christ that he give away all his money and possessions. The reason we celebrate Scrooge is simple: He stopped being a jerk about having great resources, and started using them for good.


Liberals can celebrate him for finding his heart. Conservatives can celebrate him for actually doing what they always say should be done: "Let the private sector do it." Like Pope Francis has been saying the rich should do, Scrooge lived up to the Christian ideal.

I previously had this date as 1843, because that's the year the story was published. But because of this, it had to have been about a past Christmas. Hence, I now have it listed as the year before, December 25, 1842.

Dickens sought to construct Christmas as a family-centered festival of generosity, in contrast to the community-based and church-centered observations, the observance of which had dwindled during the late 18th and early 19th Centuries. A Christmas Carol helped to restore Christmas to a day of celebration in Britain, and to establish it as such in America.

The versions of the story are so many, including the 1962 animated musical with Mr. Magoo (the 1st version that I saw, on TV around 1977 or so), the 1970 live-action musical version with Albert Finney, the 1970 Odd Couple episode "Scrooge Gets an Oscar," the 1979 Bugs Bunny version with Yosemite Sam as Scrooge, the 1983 Mickey Mouse version with Scrooge McDuck as Scrooge, Bill Murray's 1988 modern take
Scrooged, the 1992 Muppet Christmas Carol with Michael Caine, the 1994 Flintstones version, and a 2013 Smurfs version.

The 1951 film Scrooge, starring Alastair Sim, is often cited as the best version. No, the best version remains the 1984 CBS version with George C. Scott. In 1990, Star Trek actor Patrick Stewart began doing a one-man version on stage, and in 1999 starred as Scrooge in a version broadcast on TNT.

The 2009 animated version, with Jim Carrey voicing him, lists Scrooge's year of birth as 1786, making him 56 years old. I realize living was harder then, even for people as wealthy as Scrooge, but, dang, he's usually depicted as elderly, maybe over 70.


December 25, 1867: Young singer Andy Walker returns to his hometown of Virginia City, Nevada after a world tour. His uncle and manager, Thadeus Cole, tries to con Eric "Hoss" Cartwright (Dan Blocker) out of the money he's trying to raise for an orphanage. But Andy catches on to his uncle, and there's a Dickensian twist to the ensuing Christmas party at the Cartwright family's Ponderosa Ranch.

This 1966 episode of Bonanza was titled "A Christmas Story," and Andy is played by Wayne Newton, in his 2nd appearance in the role. Thadeus was played by Jack Oakie.

At age 77, Newton is still alive and performing. He has released 3 Christmas albums: Songs for a Merry Christmas in 1966, Christmas Isn't Christmas Without You in 1968, and Christmas Everywhere in 1976.

Bonanza episodes took place 99 years in the past -- established since a gravestone in a 1967 episode showed a date of death of 1868. It's odd that, in the supposedly progressive 1960s, the 3 most progressive TV shows were Bonanza, which took place nearly a century in the past; Star Trek, which took place 3 centuries in the future; and The Twilight Zone, which, as Rod Serling's narration suggested, took place in "another dimension."

As Trek creator Gene Roddenberry remarked, it was easier to get an allegory about a problem with current American life on television if it wasn't depicting current American life -- or even life on Earth at all.


December 25, 1872: We got trouble. Right here in Dodge City. With a capital T, and that rhymes with C, and that stands for Christmas. Deputy Chester Goode (Dennis Weaver) tells Marshal Matt Dillon (James Arness) that his brother Magnus (Robert Easton) is coming to the Kansas frontier town, and that he's "uncivilized." But Magnus proves to be in the holiday spirit.

This episode, titled "Magnus," aired on December 24, 1955, during the 1st season of Gunsmoke. It would be 16 years before the classic CBS Western had another Christmas episode.

Around the same time, 2 days before Christmas, falsely disgraced former U.S. Army Captain Jason McCord (Chuck Connors) meets 2 children, who tell them that their father is trying to run an orphanage out of town. This episode of Branded is titled "A Proud Town," airing on December 19, 1965.

Branded was a Western version of The Fugitive: Like Dr. Richard Kimble (David Janssen), McCord was falsely accused of a terrible crime, and so he went around the country, doing what good he could, until people figured out who he really was, and he had to leave. The difference was, Dick Kimble was a wanted man, who had fled justice when it took a wrong turn; while Jason McCord had seen justice come to its conclusion, however unfair, and was most definitely not wanted, anywhere.

December 25, 1880: I'm guessing at the year for this episode of the CBS Western series Annie Oakley, as Gail Davis was 31 years old when the episode aired on December 2, 1956, but her portrayal of Annie seems younger. In real life, Annie had already met her husband, fellow show sharpshooter Frank Butler, in 1881, and they were married the following year, but Butler never appeared as a character on the show. Jimmy Hawkins played Tagg Oakley, Annie's teenage brother, but was a wholly fictional character.

This episode was titled "Santa Claus Wears a Gun." A man calling himself Snowy Kringle (Stanley Andrews) arrives in the fictional town of Diablo, Arizona, where the Oakleys live, and demonstrates his shooting skill. The Army payroll is robbed, and Kringle is accused, but Annie clears him. There is no record of the real Annie ever serving as a detective, private or otherwise.

The year of the Western series The Lone Ranger is never specified, but it's definitely after the American Civil War ended in 1865. On December 20, 1956, 18 days after the Annie Oakley episode in question, The Lone Ranger aired "Christmas Story." The Ranger (Clayton Moore) and Tonto (Jay Silverheels) meet a boy whose Christmas wish is to be reunited with his father. Of course, "that masked man" and his faithful Indian companion succeed.

The year of the Western Have Gun -- Will Travel is stated to be 1875 at the start, so, by Season 6, it's 1880. "Be Not Forgetful of Strangers" aired on CBS on December 22, 1962, and parallels the Nativity story: The "gentleman gunfighter" Paladin (Richard Boone, who also directed the episode) helps a cowboy and his pregnant wife who are unable to find lodging.


December 25, 1892: The events of the Doctor Who episode "The Snowmen" take place, airing on December 25, 2012. Depressed over recent events, The Doctor -- the Eleventh Doctor, played by Matt Smith -- hides himself in Victorian London, where he meets barmaid Clara Oswald (Jenna Coleman). She not only discovers who and what he is, but also that there is a danger to all of humanity, and asks him to help.

He does, and they stave off the threat together, but she dies in the process. After her death, he sees her full name on her tombstone: Clara Oswin Oswald. He realizes that she is the same person as "Oswin," someone he previously saw die. Since a person can't die twice, he decides to use his TARDIS to find her elsewhere in time.

Clara becomes one of The Doctor's most popular "companions" among fans, and Coleman's career takes off as a result of her portrayal of Clara.

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December 25, 1905: Della Young has just $1.87 – about $49 in today's money – which she considers to be not enough to buy a Christmas present for her husband Jim. She goes to a woman who buys hair, has her long hair cut, and receives $20, enough money to buy a platinum fob chain to go with the watch that Jim owns and loves.

As it turns out, Jim sold the watch, and used the money to buy hair-care products for Della, which, now, she can't use until her hair grows back to a respectable length.


This story was "The Gift of the Magi," by William Sydney Porter, a.k.a. O. Henry, and is included in his 1906 collection of stories, The Four Million, named for what was then the population of New York City. It has been copied many times, as you'll see below.


Supposedly, Porter wrote it at Healy's, which is now Pete's Tavern, and claims origination as the Portman Hotel in 1829, thus making it (or so they say) the oldest continuously run bar in New York. It's at 129 East 18th Street at Irving Place, in Manhattan's Gramercy Park.


December 25, 1909, 110 years ago: The events of the Disney cartoon Lady and the Tramp begin. Jim Dear gives his wife an American Cocker Spaniel puppy, whom she names Lady.

December 25, 1930: Eliot Ness discovers that an old friend and informant of his, Hap Levinson (who does not appear onscreen), has been shot and killed after playing Santa Claus at a Chicago orphanage. Hap turns out not to be the first victim in a series of killings. Ness finds out what's going on and who's to blame.

This was on an episode of The Untouchables, titled "The Night They Shot Santa Claus." Oddly, it did not air anywhere near Christmas, but rather on September 25, 1962. Ness was a real person, but this story is entirely fictional. He was played by Robert Stack on the TV series, and by Kevin Costner in the 1987 film version.


December 25, 1933:"The Homecoming: A Christmas Story" airs on CBS on December 19, 1971, the backdoor pilot to The Waltons. The family, who live on Walton's Mountain, in the real-life Appalachians but in fictional Jefferson County, Virginia. is concerned that patriarch John Walton, who had to take a job in another State to get by, hasn't returned yet. He was played in this film by Andrew Duggan, but when the series began the next Fall, he was replaced by Ralph Waite.

December 25, 1939, 80 years ago: Ralphie Parker actually gets his "Red Ryder carbine-action, two hundred shot Range Model air rifle with a compass and this thing which tells time built right in to the stock." (This particular model did not exist in real life.) And doggone it if, but for the grace of God and his glasses, he doesn't come near to really shooting his eye out!

The film is A Christmas Story, narrated by the author of the original story, Jean Shepherd (who has a cameo as a parent standing on line with his son for Santa Claus in the store). Shepherd grew up in Hammond, Indiana, outside Chicago, although he was older than Ralphie, as 1939 was the year he graduated from Hammond High School.


In the film, Cleveland stands in for both Chicago and Hammond. Cleveland's Public Square is easily identifiable, with its big Civil War memorial in the center, the Terminal Tower (built in 1930), and Higbee's department store, which has since been turned into Horseshoe Casino Cleveland, although the Higbee's sign seen in the movie is still there.


Ralphie is played by Peter Billingsley. He is now 48, and while he still acts, having appeared in the 1st Iron Man film, he mainly produces and directs now, including the Netflix series F Is for Family.


In 2019, just 7 years after the Sandy Hook Massacre, only someone who doesn't understand anything about parenting -- or Christmas -- would give a child a firearm as a Christmas present.


December 25, 1945: Billy Bailey, co-director of the Bailey Brothers Building & Loan, of Bedford Falls, New York, with his late brother Peter's son George, loses $8,000 meant for the firm's accounts -- about $113,000 in today's money. Unable to come up with the money, George runs into one awful occurrence after another, and wishes he'd never been born.

An angel named Clarence Goodbody shows him what the world (or, at least, his home town) would have been like if that had been the case. George changes his mind, and finds that all the people he'd selflessly helped over the years have come to pay him back, to show him that, in the way that matters, he's "the richest man in town."


The film is It's a Wonderful Life, and George is played by James Stewart, Billy by Thomas Wilson, and Clarence by Henry Travers.


In the "bank run" sequence, set in 1932, $242 then would be $4,579 today; $20 would be $378.45; $17.50 would be $331.14; and the $2.00 the Baileys ended up with would be $37.84.


Here's what I don't get: George knows how Sam Wainwright can be reached. He knows Sam is a friend with means, and could help him. The bank examiner knows who Sam is, and knows that his word is good. Why doesn't George just wire Sam, and have him send a telegram not to George, but to the bank examiner, saying to expect a money order after the holiday? End of problem.

ABC late-night host Jimmy Kimmel recently showed what the film would have looked like from the perspective of the villain, Henry Potter, played by Lionel Barrymore. He was a brother of Ethel Barrymore and John Barrymore, whose granddaughter is Drew Barrymore.


On the same day, the Corleone family deals with the shooting and near-death of patriarch Vito Corleone (Marlon Brando), in the 1969 novel and the 1972 film The Godfather.

December 25, 1947: A man known only as Kris Kringle, hired to work as Santa Claus at the main Macy's store in New York's Herald Square, is committed, and his lawyer, Fred Gailey, can find only one way to get this harmless, if apparently delusional, old man out of the psych ward: By proving to a court that, just as Kris claims, he really is Santa Claus.

It works, and Fred wins the heart of Doris Walker (Maureen O'Hara), who had hired Kris, and her daughter Susan (Natalie Wood, 8 years old at the time of filming but playing 6).

Miracle On 34th Street was remade in 1973 and 1994. In those versions, Santa was played by Sebastian Cabot and Richard Attenborough, respectively; the lawyer by David Hartman and Dylan McDermott (by then starring as a lawyer on The Practice); Mrs. Walker by Jane Alexander and Elizabeth Perkins; and Susan by Suzanne Davidson and Mara Wilson.


For the 1973 version, the lawyer's name was changed to Bill Schafner, and Mrs. Walker's name was changed from Doris to Karen -- definitely not to be confused with the Karen Walker played by Megan
 Mullally on Will & Grace!

For the 1994 version, the lawyer is named Bryan Bedford, Mrs. Walker goes back to being named Doris (or, rather, "Dorey"), and, this time, fictional store names had to be used: Macy's had refused to give permission to use their name, and became "Cole's"; while Gimbel's had gone out of business, so the scriptwriters used "Shoppers Express."


And the scriptwriters decided to add the wrinkle of the U.S. military "proving" that there is no Santa Claus by proving there's no Santa's Workshop at the North Pole, thus forcing Bedford to figure out a way around that.

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December 25, 1950: Captain Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce, a surgeon with the U.S. Army at the 4077th Mobile Army Surgical Hospital in Uijeongbu, Korea, has to leave a Christmas party there to attend to a wounded soldier in a foxhole. While still wearing his Santa Claus costume. This was on an episode of M*A*S*H. Hawkeye is played by Alan Alda.

December 25, 1951: On another episode of M*A*S*H, Hawkeye pays tribute to the camp's chaplain, 1st Lieutenant (later Captain) Francis Mulcahy (played by William Christopher). And the company clerk, Corporal Walter "Radar" O'Reilly (Gary Burghoff) tells another surgeon, Major Charles Emerson Winchester III (David Ogden Stiers) that, on Father Mulcahy's recommendation, he'd written to Charles' mother, and asked her to send something that would remind the down-in-the-dumps Boston Brahmin of happier times. She sent his old toboggan cap, and Charles was overjoyed. This time, Santa was played by Captain B.J. Hunnicutt (Mike Farrell).

December 25, 1952: On yet another episode of M*A*S*H, Hawkeye, B.J., Major Margaret Houlihan (Loretta Swit), and Father Mulcahy are called away from Mulcahy's party for the local orphans, to tend to a wounded soldier. The soldier has no chance, but when Margaret finds a picture of his family in his pocket, B.J. goes back to work, saying, "A family's Christmas wreaths should be green, not black."

Despite their efforts, the patient dies at 11:25 PM. Hawkeye, seeing his best friend take it hard -- clearly thinking of his wife, Peg, and daughter, Erin, back home in the San Francisco suburb of Mill Valley, California -- moves the clock ahead, so that the time of death will read 12:05 AM, December 26.


Farrell also wrote and directed this episode. Harry Morgan played the commanding officer, Colonel Sherman Potter, and, in this episode, Potter played Santa Claus.


On yet another episode of M*A*S*H, the MASHers are celebrating Christmas with British soldiers, who tell them of the tradition of the day after Christmas, Boxing Day, which in England is celebrated with two things. Neither of which turns out to be prizefighting, as is found out by a confused Corporal (later Sergeant) Maxwell Q. Klinger (Jamie Farr), a former corpsman who, by this point, has replaced Radar as company clerk. One is noblemen trading places with their servants, to boost morale. The British Army matches this by having the officers and enlisted men switch jobs.


The other Boxing Day tradition, not mentioned on the show, is, as I mentioned earlier, nearby "football clubs" playing each other in "derby" matches. Although there was an episode that had wounded British soldiers mentioning their country's FA Cup, including Arsenal defeating Manchester United in a match. Arsenal did not, however, win an FA Cup Final during the Korean War, their best performance being losing the 1952 Final to Newcastle United. They won the Final in 1950, right before the war, and took the 1953 League title, the last one before the war ended.

Potter thinks the Boxing Day switcheroo is a great idea. So he becomes company clerk, and names Klinger commanding officer. Surgeon Hawkeye and Father Mulcahy become hospital orderlies. Surgeon B.J. and head nurse Margaret are assigned K.P. (kitchen patrol). Charles, a gourmet who's always complaining about the quality of Army food (though, to be fair, they all did), is assigned to be the cook.

Then problems arise, and Klinger is in way over his head. And then casualties arrive, and Hawkeye says, "Just this morning, I was a humble orderly. And now, I'm doing abdominal surgery."


The Korean War lasted 3 years, plus 1 month. But M*A*S*H had 4 Christmas episodes. Clearly, those British soldiers had to have arrived in the half-hour remaining of Christmas 1952, between the time B.J. lost the battle to save that soldier and midnight. It couldn't be 1950, since it would have been Captain "Trapper" John McIntyre (Wayne Rogers) in B.J.'s place, Lieutenant Colonel Henry Blake (McLean Stevenson) in Potter's, and Major Frank Burns (Larry Linville) in Charles'.  And it couldn't be 1951, since Klinger has already replaced Radar as company clerk.


This was also the year of the 1st regular TV show -- in other words, not an anthology series -- to have a Christmas episode: The Adventures of Ozzie & Harriet. The episode is titled "The Boys Earn Some Christmas Money." Bandleader Ozzie Nelson lets his sons David and Ricky do odd jobs so they can buy Christmas presents. The episode aired on December 19, 1952.

Which means that, by 6 days, it beat The Amos 'n Andy Show. Andy Brown (Spencer Williams) has a goddaughter for whom he wants to get a talking doll, but he's broke as usual. He convinces a department store manager to hire him -- making him TV's 1st black Santa Claus.

December 25, 1953: On television, Father Xavier Rojas (Harry Bartell -- far be it for a TV network in the early Fifties to get a Hispanic actor to play a Hispanic character) discovers that the statue of the Infant Jesus is stolen from its crib at the Old Mission Plaza Church in Los Angeles. The statue's worth is only a few dollars, but it is of great sentimental value for the parish.

L.A. Police Sergeant Joe Friday (Jack Webb) and Officer Frank Smith (Ben Alexander) promise to try to get it back before Mass on Christmas Day, but this means that they have less than 24 hours to catch the thief. As was always said on Dragnet, "The story you have just heard is true. The names have been changed, to protect the innocent."


The episode is title "The Big Little Jesus." When Dragnet returned in color in the 1960s, a 1967 episode basically redid the story, under the title "The Christmas Story," this time with Detective Friday teaming with Detective Bill Gannon (Harry Morgan -- 8 years before he first played Colonel Potter).


December 25, 1955: Not having enough money to buy his wife Alice a proper Christmas present, Brooklyn bus driver Ralph Kramden pawns his bowling ball. And on Christmas Eve, he finds Alice has given him a proper bag for his bowling ball.

This Honeymooners episode, "'Twas the Night Before Christmas," was based on "The Gift of the Magi." Ralph was played by Jackie Gleason, Alice by Audrey Meadows.


A year earlier, when "The Honeymooners" was still just a sketch on the hourlong The Jackie Gleason Show, Gleason played most of his characters: Ralph, Reginald Van Gleason III, Joe the Bartender, Fenwick Babbitt, and the mute, pantomiming Pour Soul. Noticeably absent was "Charlie Bratton the Loudmouth."


Halfway across the country, in Milwaukee, Richie Cunningham (Ron Howard) discovers that his pal Arthur Fonzarelli (Henry Winkler) has nowhere to go on Christmas. Naturally, Richie proves that, on occasion, he can be every bit as cool as the Fonz, and invites him to have dinner with the family. Happy Days, indeed.


This episode, titled "Guess Who's Coming to Christmas," aired in 1974 -- and it was eventually established that the show took place 19 years in the past; hence, 1955.


December 25, 1956: Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball), Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz), Fred Mertz (William Frawley) and Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance) reminisce while trimming the tree on The I Love Lucy Christmas Show, airing on Christmas Eve. It's a clip show, and includes Lucy announcing her pregnancy and the birth of Little Ricky.

*

December 25, 1960: Fired after arriving for work late and sloshed, department store Santa Henry Corwin wanders into an alley and finds a bag filled with gifts. The spirit of the holiday is one of the few bright spots in Henry's life, and as he begins handing out the gifts, he realizes the bag is able to produce any gift a recipient requests. After a brief jail stint that ends with Henry changing the mind of his mean, skeptical former boss, he continues handing out gifts.

Soon, one of his giftees points out that Henry has taken nothing from the bag himself. All he wants? To continue playing Santa every year. The wish is granted when he finds an elf with a reindeer-driven sleigh waiting, to whisk him off to the North Pole.


This was an episode of The Twilight Zone, titled "Night of the Meek," and one of the few episodes of the show to truly have a happy ending. Henry was played by Art Carney.


Also on this day, in Mayberry, North Carolina, department store owner and resident Scrooge Ben Weaver demands that Sheriff Andy Taylor lock up local moonshiner Jim Muggins. Muggins' family, as well as Andy's, gather to celebrate the holiday with Jim. After witnessing how Jim and Andy and their broods can turn the jailhouse stay into a warm, inviting celebration, Weaver gets himself arrested so he can be part of the fun, and he ends the holiday by getting a nip of Jim's hooch himself.

This was the only Christmas episode of The Andy Griffith Show, and was titled "The Christmas Story." Andy was played by Andy Griffith, Deputy (and substitute Santa Claus) Barney Fife by Don Knotts, Ben by Will Wright, and Jim by Sam Edwards.


December 25, 1963: Alan Brady (Carl Reiner) airs his annual Christmas show, and he's tired of critics saying his show lacks heart. So he asks his writing team to perform, instead of his usual company of actors.

So Rob Petrie (Dick Van Dyke), his wife Laura (Mary Tyler Moore), their son Ritchie (Larry Matthews), Solly Rogers (Rose Marie), Buddy Sorrell (Morey Amsterdam) and Mel Cooley (also Alan's director and his brother-in-law, played by Richard Deacon) go on the soundstage and goof off, and it's a roaring success.

"The Alan Brady Show" presents, an episode of The Dick Van Dyke Show, aired on December 18, 1963. Rob was based on Carl Reiner, meaning that Ritchie was based on Carl's son, Rob Reiner.

Although the song doesn't say so, the boy-meets-girl story of The Four Seasons' 1976 Number 1 hit "December 1963 (Oh What a Night)" -- "Late December, back in '63" -- could be a Christmas party. Certainly, the combination of love at first sight, Christmas decorations, and possibly hard cider or spiked egg nog could result in a situation that was "hypnotizin', mesmerisin' me."

December 25, 1964: The TV special version of "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" premiered on December 6, produced for CBS by Arthur Rankin Jr. and Jules Bass. They would produce many animated Christmas specials, some in the traditional cartoon format, some (like this one) with stop-motion animation.

Johnny Marks, writer of the song, was enlisted to write new songs, the best-known of which became "Holly Jolly Christmas," sung by Burl Ives in character as the special's narrator, Sam the Snowman.

It has often been pointed out that, in this special, the story gets worse before it gets better: Even Santa himself gets on Rudolph's case – and on that of Donner, who in the story is both the lead reindeer on the sleigh and Rudolph's father, for essentially passing on a genetic mutation (of which Donner himself appears to be only a carrier).

This is not one of Santa's better pop-culture representations. But, remember, this story isn't about Santa, it's about Rudolph. And Sam the Snowman (voice of Burl Ives) is giving you his perception of what happened. Sam might be an unreliable narrator.

Also, Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, which premiered on November 14, 1964, would have taken place. The leaders of Mars believe their children are watching too much TV from Earth. Understandable. But one thing leads to another, and they decide the way to alleviate this is to kidnap Santa Claus (John Call). In the end, instead of "conquering" Mars through combat, Santa does so inadvertently, as an aide to the King of Mars decides Mars needs Santa, and becomes their Santa, with our Santa agreeing to this.


Doris Rich plays Mrs. Claus, the 1st appearance of the character in a movie. It is regarded as "one of the worst movies ever," and "so bad, it's good," getting it chosen by the Mystery Science Theater 3000 crew in 1991.

Also on this day, the personal life of Peggy Olson (Elisabeth Moss) gets messy. That of Don Draper (Jon Hamm) gets even messier than it already was. And a Christmas party at the ad agency goes very wrong. This episode of Mad Men, which aired incongruously on August 1, 2010, is titled "Christmas Comes But Once a Year."

December 25, 1965: Charlie Brown, the lead character of Charles Schulz' comic strip Peanuts  (voiced here by Peter Robbins), wasn't the 1st fictional character to wonder what Christmas was all about, nor the last. Nor was he the first nor the last to get his Christmas hopes laughed at.

But, as his best friend Linus Van Pelt (voiced by Chris Shea) points out (after quoting The Gospel According to Luke, Chapter 2, Verses 8 through 14, to remind us of "what Christmas is all about"), like the scrawny little tree that he'd found, ol' Chuck (voiced by Peter Robbins) just needed a little love.


A Charlie Brown Christmas first aired on December 9, 1965, was the 1st Peanuts special, and it remains the best.

I have a theory, and, as far as I can tell, there is nothing in the images or script of the special that disproves it. Charlie Brown is depressed during the Christmas season, and everyone else has thrown themselves into the superficial and commercial sides of it, for the same reason: The special takes place in 1963, after the assassination.

December 25, 1966: Agents Napoleon Solo and Illya Kuryakin have to protect Chairman Georgi Koz, a foreign leader, who looks suspiciously like Nikita Khrushchev, at the United Nations. This episode of The Man from U.N.C.L.E. was titled "The Jingle Bells Affair."

Solo was played by Robert Vaughn, Kuryakin by David McCallum, and Koz by Akim Tamiroff, who was born in the part of the Russian Empire that is now the former "Soviet republic" of Georgia, but was of Armenian descent. Vaughn died in 2017. He was the last surviving member of the titular heroes in the 1960 film The Magnificent Seven.


Also on this day, as aspiring actress Ann Marie (Marlo Thomas) ends her shift as an elf for a department store Santa Claus, she tells her boyfriend Donald Hollinger (Ted Bessell) about her stint as a teacher in a boarding school trying to bring good tidings and joy to a boy who won't be able to go home for Christmas. This episode of That Girl was titled "Christmas and the Hard-Luck Kid." It was written by James L. Brooks. (Remember that for a few moments.)


That Girl premiered on September 8 of that year -- as did Star Trek.


December 25, 1968: The Arnold family of The Wonder Years -- the location is never specified, although show writer Neal Marlens wanted it to be set in his hometown of Huntington, Long Island, New York, hence Kevin often wears a Jets jacket -- is disappointed that family patriarch Jack (Dan Lauria) didn't take the opportunity of Christmas to buy the family's 1st color television set.

Kevin (played by Fred Savage, adult Kevin's voiceover by Daniel Stern) says that said set was bought in 1970. This suggests that the writers did well with their research, because that was the 1st year in which more than half of all American households had color TV.

December 25, 1969, 50 years ago: Carol Brady (Florence Henderson) loses her voice, just days before a lucky chance to sing a solo at her suburban Los Angeles church's Christmas service. Youngest daughter Cindy (Susan Olsen) hears the kid in front of her in line ask Santa Claus for a jillion things, so she tells Santa that all she wants for Christmas is for her Mom to get her voice back. She does, singing "O Come, All Ye Faithful," making this episode of The Brady Bunch, "The Voice of Christmas," a happy one.

This was also the year that Rankin-Bass debuted their special Frosty the Snowman, narrated by Jimmy Durante, with Jackie Vernon voicing Frosty. Had the character not already had his song -- which doesn't mention Christmas at all -- played endlessly at Christmastime, this special would have been enough to irrevocably link him with the holiday.

Billy DeWolfe voiced Professor Hinkle, and this is one of the cases in pop culture history where the villain had a point: "That old silk hat they found" was actually his. The kids didn't exactly steal it, but, once they knew who it belonged to, it should have been returned. Sorry, Frosty, but possession is not really 9/10ths of the law.

*

December 25, 1970: Felix Unger, a commercial photographer -- portraits a specialty -- asks his roommate, New York Herald sports columnist Oscar Madison, to play Ebenezer Scrooge in a neighborhood production of A Christmas Carol.

Oscar bah-humbugs the idea, until his awful diet produces a nightmare in which he actually is Scrooge, Felix becomes Jacob Marley, and "Ebenezer Madison" sees his Christmas Past, his Christmas Present, and a possible Christmas Future. This convinces him to do the play.


This episode of The Odd Couple was titled "Scrooge Gets an Oscar." Felix was played by Tony Randall, and Oscar by Jack Klugman. Sadly, Klugman died on a Christmas Eve, December 24, 2012. Randall died on May 17, 2004.


Also on this day, Mary Richards (Mary Tyler Moore) has to work on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day at Minneapolis TV station WJM-Channel 12, and so it seems that her favorite holiday is completely ruined.


However, on her Christmas Eve shift, her coworkers come to the rescue, bringing the holiday spirit to her, and proving that even if the holiday isn't in line with tradition, it can still be a wonderful night full of bright spirits.

This episode of The Mary Tyler Moore Show is titled "Christmas and the Hard-Luck Kid II": It was a reference to the aforementioned episode of That Girl, written by James L. Brooks. Brooks also wrote this episode, or rather co-wrote it with Allan Burns.


Rankin-Bass' Santa Claus Is Comin' to Town first aired on December 13, 1970. Fred Astaire, as mailman S.D. (for "Special Delivery") Kluger, narrates an origin story for Santa, who is voiced by Mickey Rooney -- already an "old elf," but frequently not jolly. In 1977, Rankin-Bass would bring Astaire as Kluger back, for another origin-story special, The Easter Bunny Is Comin' to Town.

December 25, 1971: "Christmas Day at the Bunkers'" in Flushing, Queens is not merry, as Archie (Carroll O'Connor) makes a mistake at work, sending an order to London, England (which, of course, he's heard of) when it should have been sent to London, Ontario (which he hasn't). This costs him a Christmas bonus. This was the 1st Christmas episode of All In the Family.

December 25, 1973: In another All In the Family Christmas episode, titled "Edith's Christmas Story," Archie's wife Edith (Jean Stapleton) tries to keep the holiday going despite knowing that the doctor found a lump in her breast.

I don't know if this was the 1st time the word "breast" was used in prime time. Edith did survive the scare -- although Stapleton left the show (by then renamed Archie Bunker's Place) in 1980, and Edith's death was written into the series. No cause was given.


December 25, 1974: This was almost The Year Without a Santa Claus. Mickey Rooney, reprises the role in this Rankin-Bass special, but he's just not feelin' it this year. Shirley Booth, in what turns out to be her final acting role (she retired, and lived a few more years), narrates in character as Mrs. Claus, replacing the previous special's voicer, Roberta "Robie" Lester.

This special also, many years before the Santa Clause movies did so, introduces Mother Nature into the Santa legend, and her sons, Snow Miser (Dick Shawn) and Heat Miser (George S. Irving).

December 25, 1976: Office of Scientific Intelligence Agent Steve Austin (Lee Majors), a former U.S. Air Force Colonel, test pilot and astronaut, discovers that an OSI project is being tampered with by a modern-day Scrooge.

So The Six Million Dollar Man uses his enhancements to create the episode's title, "A Bionic Christmas Carol," and gets the man to mend his ways. Factoring in inflation, the $6 million it cost to "rebuild" Steve in 1973 would be about $35.6 million today.

Another superhero, Wonder Woman (Lynda Carter), faces down a holiday-season saboteur in the episode "The Deadly Toys."


Meanwhile, across the country, in Queens, it's Christmas dinner at the Bunkers' house on All In the Family. Gloria and Mike Stivic (Sally Struthers and Rob Reiner) invite David
, an old friend of Mike's living in Canada, but choose not to tell Gloria's parents Archie and Edith that the reason David went to Canada is that he is, as the episode's title states, "The Draft Dodger." He was played by Renny Temple, who has mostly directed since the late 1980s.


Unlike most of these Christmas episodes, this one actually did air on a December 25, a day on which networks usually show reruns, thinking families will be eating Christmas dinner at the time, or show "family entertainment" films and specials.


Archie had also invited a friend, Pinky Peterson (Eugene Roche), whose son had asked him whether he should accept being drafted into the Army and fight in Vietnam, or run away to Canada. Pinky advised him to obey the law, and accept being drafted. Pinky's son was killed, making Pinky a "Gold Star Father." Also a widower, Pinky was thus alone on Christmas, and Archie, in a gesture of humanity not often seen from him, thought Pinky could use the company.


When Archie finds out about David, he rants and raves, until Pinky asks if his opinion means anything. Archie, citing Pinky's circumstances, says his opinion means more than anyone else's. Pinky tells his son's story, and offers David the handshake that he says his son would have given. As usual, Archie does not take defeat well.


December 25, 1978: Or, rather, on the 24th: It's Christmas Eve On Sesame Street, which first aired on PBS on December 3, 1978. Bert (voiced by Frank Oz) doesn't have enough money to buy a Christmas present for Ernie (Jim Henson). So he sells his beloved paper-clip collection to Harold "Mr." Hooper (played by Will Lee), and uses the money to buy a soap dish for Ernie's beloved Rubber Duckie.

But Ernie doesn't have enough money to buy a present for Bert, either, so he sells his Duckie to Mr. Hooper, and uses the money to buy a cigar box, which he thinks would be perfect for storing Bert's collection.


Then Mr. Hooper comes over and gives them presents: Bert gets his paper clips back, and Ernie gets his Duckie back. The boys, feeling guilty, tell Mr. Hooper – who's Jewish, and has been wished a Happy Hanukkah by Bob Johnson (Bob McGrath) – that they're sorry they didn't get him anything. He tells the boys, "I got the best Christmas present ever: I got to see that everybody got exactly what they wanted."


Another main plotline is the cruel question of Oscar the Grouch's to Big Bird (both of them voiced by Carroll Spinney): How does big fat Santa Claus get down those skinny chimneys? As it turns out, it doesn't matter how: Apparently, he does it.


The other, much funnier subplot, tells of Cookie Monster (also Frank Oz) trying to contact Santa Claus, to ask Big Red to bring him cookies for Christmas. The problem is, Cook keeps eating his means of communication. First, he ends up eating his pencil. Then he tries to type, but the typewriter keys remind him of raisins, and then the paper reminds him of fortune cookies. Finally, he tries to call Santa on the phone, but the ends of the receiver look like "cuppy-cakes" to him. Oddly, in later episodes, he claims to be allergic to peanut butter cookies and hazelnut cookies.


Also on this day, Mindy McConnell (Pam Dawber) has to explain Christmas to alien Mork from Ork (Robin Williams). This episode of Mork & Mindy is titled, naturally, "Mork's First Christmas." Morgan Fairchild guest-stars.

*

December 25, 1980: Hazzard County Executive Jefferson Davis "Boss" Hogg (Sorrell Boke) hires a trio of criminals to hijack a load of Christmas trees bound for the Georgia locale, knowing that Bo and Luke Duke (John Schneider and Tom Wopat) were responsible for the deliveries, and for the receipt of a $500 down payment. (About $1,491 in today's money.)

With the community convinced that the Duke Boys had stolen the funds, the crooks each dress as Santa Claus and break into Hogg's safe to retrieve the stolen money. Bo, Luke, their cousin Daisy (Catherine Bach) and their mechanic friend Cooter Davenport (Ben Jones) eventually team to give Hogg and the bad guys a lesson in confusion.


In the end, Hogg -- who has been Scroogelike throughout the episode -- gets a lesson in the meaning of the season. This episode of The Dukes of Hazzard is titled "The Great Santa Claus Chase."


December 25, 1982: Chicago Police Detective Neal Washington (Taurean Blacque) tries to make amends with the widow of a liquor store owner that he accidentally killed while trying to foil a robbery. Another Detective, Michael "Mick" Belker (Bruce Weitz), goes undercover as Santa Claus. This episode of Hill Street Blues is titled "Santaclaustrophobia." That title would also be used for a 2003 episode of The King of Queens.

Also on this day, Philadelphia commodities broker Louis Winthorpe III (Dan Aykroyd) learns of the scam pulled by Randolph and Mortimer Duke (Ralph Bellamy and Don Ameche); and that his apparent tormentor, Billy Ray Valentine (Eddie Murphy), is also about to become a victim of the scam.


He teams up with his butler Coleman (Denholm Elliott) and his prostitute girlfriend Ophelia (Jamie Lee Curtis), so that he and Billy Ray, and the Dukes (definitely richer and meaner than the "Duke Boys" of Hazzard), will be Trading Places.

The $1.00 that the Dukes bet each other? It would be worth about $2.64 in today's money.

December 25, 1984: Randall Peltzer buys a mogwai for his son Billy, unaware that "mogwai" is Canton Chinese for "devil." He is given 3 rules: Never expose it to direct sunlight, never let it get wet, and never feed it after midnight. Sunlight has the same effect that it would on a vampire. Getting it wet turns it into a tribble. Feeding it after midnight, well... This is a bad rule. There are time zone issues, and how long after midnight is it safe to feed the thing again?

Though it takes place during the Christmas season, Gremlins premiered at the other end of the year, on June 8, 1984. Randall is played by Hoyt Axton, Billy by Zach Galligan, Howie Mandel voices Gizmo, and Stripe is voiced by Frank Walker -- also the voice of Fred from Scooby-Doo, the title character in Dynomutt, Dog Wonder, Hefty Smurf on The Smurfs, Megatron from Transformers, and Dr. Claw in Inspector Gadget.

December 25, 1988: New York Police Detective John McClane goes to Los Angeles to visit his estranged wife Holly Gennaro, at the same time that Hans Gruber and his terrorists decide to rob her company of $640 million in bonds -- about $1.36 billion in today's money. The film is Die Hard. Ho ho ho and yippie-kai-yay.

I've gotten into debates as to whether Die Hard is "a Christmas movie." I say it isn't, because, while it takes place on Christmas Eve, and Christmas decorations are shown, almost none of the usual Christmas tropes are used.

There's no reference to the Nativity, or to Santa or any of his entourage, and the only Christmas song played is "Christmas in Hollis" by Run-DMC, near the beginning. Vaughn Monroe's version of "Let It Snow" plays over the closing credits, but, as I've noted before, that song has nothing to do with Christmas. The film wasn't even released at Christmastime: It premiered on July 15, 1988.

Also on this day, the extended Tanner family of San Francisco gets stuck at the snow-covered airport on Christmas. Middle daughter Stephanie (Jodie Sweetin) is convinced that she won't get any Christmas presents, because now, Santa Claus won't be able to find her. But Santa shows up at the airport. At first, she thinks it's actually "Uncle" Joey Gladstone (Dave Coulier) in disguise. It isn't.

This episode of Full House is titled "Our Very First Christmas Show," and it also features the first kiss between actual uncle Jesse Katsopolis (John Stamos) and Rebecca Donaldson (Lori Loughlin), co-host of the show-within-the-show Wake Up San Francisco along with Stephanie's father Danny (Bob Saget). Jesse and Rebecca, of course, eventually get married. Sorrell Booke, who played Boss Hogg on The Dukes of Hazzard, guest-stars.


A few weeks before Christmas 1988, Art Carney would appear in my favorite Christmas-themed commercial of all time, despite it being for a product I don't like, Coca-Cola: "Grandpa's magic pinecone!" The grandson was played by Brian Bonsall, who played Andy Keaton on Family Ties and Worf's son Alexander Rozhenko on Star Trek: The Next Generation. He stopped acting while in high school, and has been in punk bands ever since.

December 25, 1989
, 30 years ago: Married... with Children does a takeoff on It's a Wonderful Life. Al Bundy (Ed O'Neill) gets shocked into unconsciousness while working on his Christmas lights, and is visited by a rather unlikely guardian angel, played by Sam Kinison. He gets to see what the world would be like if he had never been born. As it turned out, much better for Peg (Katey Sagal). Unable to stand the thought of his family happier without him, Al wants to live again.

And the 3rd film in National Lampoon's Vacation series, Christmas Vacation, takes place. Chevy Chase again leads the Griswold clan of Chicago, but, this time, they're staying home for the holidays.

*

December 25, 1990: The film Home Alone takes place. Compared to Nicolae Ceausescu and Billy Martin the year before, the Wet Bandits, played by Joe Pesci and Daniel Stern, get off considerably easier, despite being tormented by Kevin McCallister, the child protector of the home they were invading in Shermer, Illinois. Kevin was played by Macaulay Culkin.

There are various wild theories about Kevin, including that he grew up to become Jigsaw in the Saw series, and that Old Man Marley (clearly named after Jacob) is actually Kevin as an old man, traveling through time, to fix his life after he initially failed to defend the house decades earlier.

Also on this day, on The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, Will Smith (played by Will Smith) spends his 1st Christmas in the Los Angeles suburb of Bel-Air. He wants to make himself feel a little more at home, and give his cousin Ashley Banks (Tatyana M. Ali) a taste of a real Christmas, so he decorates the Banks home in flashy, non-Home Owners Association approved decorations.

Naturally, the whole neighborhood -- which includes the 
newly-crowned Heavyweight Champion of the World, Evander Holyfield, who plays himself -- comes out in protest. Eventually, a group of neighborhood kids comes by to bestow an award for the best Christmas decorations in Bel-Air to the Banks and their "eyesore," because it has the whimsy of a child's idea of Christmas. The HOA gives up the fight, and Will chips away at another snobby Bel-Air tradition.


December 25, 1991: It's a wild Christmas for Gotham City, with Bruce Wayne, a.k.a. Batman (Michael Keaton), having to fight the Penguin (Danny DeVito), fellow billionaire industrialist Max Schreck (Christopher Walken, having stolen the Nosferatu star's name and Thomas Jefferson's hair), and Catwoman, who also happens to be his new girlfriend, Selina Kyle (Michelle Pfeiffer).

Batman Returns was released on June 19, 1992, at the opposite end of the year from Christmas. But if Die Hard counts as a Christmas film, then so does Batman Returns. One thing I can't figure out, though: How come DeVito's version of the Penguin had more henchmen dressed like clowns than any version of the Joker ever has?

December 25, 1993: New York Police Detective Andy Sipowicz (Dennis Franz) is not the first man you would think of to play Santa Claus at a Christmas party, but he does it. James Martinez (Nicholas Turturro) gets his shield, indicating his to Detective.

And Detective John Kelly (David Caruso) visits his mother at a nursing home. Her Alzheimer's-affected mind has her going back and forth between seeing her son as the man he is, and also as her husband, also a detective named John Kelly, who'd been killed in the line of duty years earlier.

This episode of NYPD Blue was titled "From Hare to Eternity," for a subplot in which Detective Greg Medavoy (Gordon Clapp) discovers that a cat living in the 15th Precinct house has eaten a rabbit he'd wanted to bring home to his kids.


Also on this day, Chicago-based toy company executive Scott Calvin accidentally causes the death of Santa Claus, and finds a note in Big Red's pocket: "If something should happen to me, put on the suit. The reindeer will know what to do." Scott does this, and gets taken to the remaining houses, and, through the magic of the "office" of Santa Claus, puts the gifts in the stockings. He is then taken to the North Pole, where he is told that, now, he is Santa.

Soon, he finds he is putting on a lot of weight, his hair is turning white, he can't stop himself from growing a beard, and he begins to develop Santa's powers, including knowing things about people he couldn't possibly know, mainly whether they are naughty or nice. This is told in the early part of the film The Santa Clause. Scott is played by Tim Allen.

December 25, 1994, 25 years ago: It's been a year since Scott Calvin became Santa, and now, he's fully prepared to go on his 1st real run. But he ends up getting arrested, and the elves have to, figuratively and literally, bail him out. This enables him to reconcile with, if not win back, his ex-wife, and concludes The Santa Clause.

Elsewhere in Tim Allen's ouevre, Tim Taylor has to tell his son Randy, who wants to spend Christmas at a ski lodge with his friends, "Christmas isn't about being with people you like! It's about being with your family!" The show was Home Improvement, Randy was played by Jonathan Taylor Thomas.

"Tim the Tool Man" could use some of Superman's invulnerability. However, on Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman, Big Blue (Dean Cain) has his hands full. This episode, titled "Seasons Greedings," adapts the Superman villain Winslow P. Schott, the Toyman, for the small screen.

Instead of the Ben Franklin-ish appearance of the comic book villain, this Toyman, a man fired from his job designing toys, is played by Sherman Hemsley. So he invents toys that spray a substance that makes people greedy, and makes adults act like children -- and, as it turns out, Kryptonians such as Superman/Clark Kent are not immune. 

With help from Lois Lane (Teri Hatcher), things get straightened out, Schott sees the error of his ways, and he even gets a date -- who is played by Hemsley's former TV wife, Isabel Sanford. Dick Van Patten (as a Santa), comedian Dom Irrera, and Dean's mother Sharon Thomas Cain also appear.


In the fictional Chicago satellite town of Lanford, Illinois, Becky Healey (Sarah Chalke, having replaced Lecy Goranson in the role), daughter of title character Roseanne Conner (Roseanne Barr), gets a job at Bunz (a ripoff of Hooters) to help put her husband Mark (Glenn Quinn) through college.


Becky's father Dan (John Goodman) and Mark have never really gotten along, but, together, they put up Christmas decorations in such a fashion that it gives this episode its title: "White Trash Christmas."
 Why? To protest the neighborhood's newly-installed "white twinkle lights only" rule. That this plot was a twist on the aforementioned Fresh Prince of Bel-Air episode seems to have escaped the Roseanne writers and producers.

December 25, 1997: In the 9th and final season of Seinfeld, we finally find out what Cosmo Kramer (Michael Richards) did when he, you know, actually worked. He worked at H&H Bagels -- which existed in real life, until going out of business in 2012. He and his fellow employees went on strike 12 years earlier, demanding an hourly wage that, in the show's continuity, has now become the New York State minimum wage. Kramer goes back to work, but soon quits.

The Seinfeld gang's, uh, friend, dentist Tim Whatley (Bryan Cranston, breaking naughty if not outright bad), hosts a Hanukkah party. Elaine Benes (Julia Louis-Dreyfus), who has an on-again-off-again relationship with him, can't believe Tim is still Jewish. Jerry Seinfeld (Jerry Seinfeld) says, "It's a breeze without the parents."


In a previous episode, Jerry came to the conclusion that Watley had converted just so he could tell Jewish jokes and use Yiddish words with impunity. Asked by a priest, "This offends you as a Jew?" Jerry says, "No, it offends me as a comedian!"


And George Costanza (Jason Alexander) has to deal with his father Frank (Jerry Stiller) reviving, upon urging from Kramer, his former, noncommercial holiday, set on December 23. "This is the best Festivus ever!" he yells during "The Feats of Strength." This episode is titled "The Strike."


December 25, 1998: Just Shoot Me! airs "How the Finch Stole Christmas," narrated by Kelsey Grammer (Frasier Crane on Cheers and Frasier), who uses his basso profundo voice to sing "You're a Mean One, Mr. Finch." But Dennis Finch (David Spade) has (roughly) the same thing happen to him that the Grinch did.

The episode also has references to It's a Wonderful Life and, with Elliot DiMauro (Enrico Colantoni) looking a lot like ol' Chuck thanks to his bald head and his shirt, A Charlie Brown Christmas.


December 25, 1999, 20 years ago: White House Director of Communications Toby Ziegler (Richard Schiff) discovers that a homeless man, who'd received a Winter coat that Toby had donated, has died, and is a Korean War veteran. Toby uses his position to get him a military funeral and burial at Arlington National Cemetery. President Bartlet (Martin Sheen, as stated earlier) isn't happy about how it was done, but allows it.

Bartlet's secretary, Delores Landingham (Kathryn Joosten), attends the funeral, and tells Toby that her late husband had also served in the Korean War, and that their twin sons Andrew and Simon had been killed in Vietnam -- on Christmas Eve, 1970. The episode of The West Wing is titled "In Excelsis Deo."


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December 25, 2000: A darker episode of The West Wing, titled "Noel," tells of how Deputy Chief of Staff Joshua Lyman is dealing with post-traumatic stress disorder, after being the person most seriously hurt in the recent assassination attempt on President Bartlet. Cellist Yo-Yo Ma appears as himself, and his performance at a holiday concert in the East Room of the White House triggers the memory of the police and ambulance sirens from the attempt.

Bradley Whitford won an Emmy for playing Josh in this episode. Near the end of it, Chief of Staff Leo McGarry (John Spencer) tells Josh the story about a man who falls into a hole, and puts Josh at ease by saying, "As long as I got a job, you got a job."


Also on this day, Shannon O'Donnel was not enjoying the Christmas season. Two days later, on December 27, she noted in her diary that she wasn't looking forward to New Year's Eve, but at least Christmas was over.

She was a project engineer on the Millennium Gate, a kilometer-high structure (taller than anything on Earth in real life, even now) to be built in Portage Lake, Indiana, and meant to be a model for future space colonization. She convinced the last holdout for the project, a bookstore owner named Henry Janeway, to sell his property and let the Gate be built. Within the Star Trek continuity, this project is completed in 2012.

This story was told in the Star Trek: Voyager episode "11:59." Shannon and Henry go on to marry, and become the ancestors of Captain Kathryn Janeway. Kate Mulgrew played Kathryn in the show's "present," 2365, and Shannon in the flashback sequence. Henry was played by Kevin Tighe.

Friends was not good with Christmas episodes. This could be because half the main cast -- David Schwimmer as Ross Geller, Courteney Cox as Monica Geller, and Jennifer Aniston as Rachel Green -- were playing Jewish characters. The best was "The One with the Holiday Armadillo," airing on December 14, 2000.

Ross wants to introduce his son Ben, now 5, to Hanukkah, but he's all jazzed for Christmas. So he wants to get a Santa Claus costume, to play the part for his son. Unfortunately, he just missed the last one, and the only costume left in the store is an armadillo. When Ross shows up at the party as "The Holiday Armadillo," his explanation of Hanukkah -- and what armadillos have to do with it -- fall flat. To make matters worse, Chandler Bing (Matthew Perry), his college roommate and Monica's boyfriend, shows up in a Santa suit, the last one that Ross just missed.

December 25, 2001: Or, rather, 2 days before. In "Bartlet For America," a Congressional hearing into whether President Bartlet committed any crimes in keeping his multiple sclerosis from the public focuses on Leo, who flashes back to the 1st Bartlet campaign.

Before a shocking truth can be revealed, the Republican Counsel on the committee, Cliff Calley (Mark Feuerstein), recommends that they break for Christmas. This buys time for a solution, which is found in the next episode (a Congressional censure of the President, but no impeachment process), and both the President and Leo end up keeping their jobs, at least through the end of the 1st term.


Also on this day, it's been 8 years since Scott Calvin became Santa Claus, and he's doing very well at it. But he begins to lose his powers, and even his look. It turns out that Santa has to be married. It's "The Mrs. Clause."

This is confirmed at a meeting of The Council of Legendary Elders: Aisha Tyler as Mother Nature, Peter Boyle as Father Time, Jay Thomas as the Easter Bunny, Kevin Pollak as Cupid, Art LaFleur (Babe Ruth in The Sandlot) as a rather masculine Tooth Fairy (preceding Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson in the role by a few years), and Michael Dorn (Worf in Star Trek) as The Sandman.

This brings up the question: What happened to all the previous Mrs. Clauses? Including the wife of the Santa that Scott accidentally killed on Christmas '93? Was he already a widower? Or is his wife still alive? Clearly, she didn't have to marry him. Could she be out for revenge? That would have made a heck of a sequel.

Certainly, that plot, with her attempt to sabotage Scott's attempt to woo his son's principal, Carol Newman (Elizabeth Mitchell), would have been a better story for The Santa Clause 2 than his attempt to build a robotic substitute Santa to stand in for him, resulting in near-disaster, actually was.

December 25, 2002: Now re-elected -- it was never explained on the show why Presidential elections were now taking place in even-numbered non-leap years -- Jed Bartlet has an old problem crop up.

Washington Post White House correspondent Danny Concannon (Timothy Busfield), who has a flirtatious relationship with White House Press Secretary C.J. Cregg (Allison Janney), arrives in a Santa Claus suit, and tells her he knows about the assassination of a foreign defense minister (and brother of the prime minister) who ran a terrorist group that intended to blow up the Golden Gate Bridge -- except that, in West Wing World, "their 9/11" was prevented. (The series would close by showing C.J. and Danny married with a baby.)

Meanwhile, we discover that Toby was born 2 days before Christmas 1954, and his father, Julius "Julie" Ziegler (Jerry Adler), an ex-con due to having worked for the long-defunct Brooklyn-based Jewish organized-crime outfit Murder, Incorporated, visits. Toby can't figure out how, with a criminal record, his father got past White House security. They have to tie up loose ends. The episode is titled "Holy Night."


The 1st "Hallmark Christmas movie" also premiered in 2002, on December 21: A Christmas Visitor. George and Carol Boyajian (William Devane and Meredith Baxter, respectively) haven't celebrated Christmas since their son Matthew was killed in the Gulf War shortly before Christmas 1991. (This is an error: While troops were deployed in "Operation Desert Shield" by Christmas 1990, the actual war, "Operation Desert Storm," lasted from January 16 to February 28, 1991. Matthew could have been killed by a terrorist attack around Christmas '91, but not in the war.)

Their remaining child, daughter Jeanie (Reagan Pasternak), has a life-threatening illness. George thinks they should celebrate Christmas again, but Carol doesn't. George finds Matthew (Dean McDermott), a hitchhiker about the age John would be now, who says he served in John's regiment. George invites him over. Eventually, the family sees a scar that John had before the war, and they realize that Matthew is John's ghost, who came back to restore their Christmas spirit.

Also for this Christmas, The Santa Claus 3: The Escape Clause takes place. Martin Short plays Jack Frost, who tricks Scott Calvin, whose wife Carol (who became Mrs. Claus at the end of the 2nd film) is about to have a baby (And where are all the children the various Santas have had through the ages?), into renouncing his post.

This is also the year of the Christmas episode of The Sopranos, "...To Save Us All from Satan's Power." Bobby Baccalieri (Steven R. Schirripa) makes a lousy Santa Claus. And, with some irony, Tony Soprano (James Gandolfini) confiscates a gun that had been a gift from a guy named Ralphie (Ralph Cifaretto, played by Joe Pantoliano), to Jackie Aprile Jr. (Jason Cerbone).

This creates an alternate timeline where Scott is now the boss of his former toy company, but his family is in ruins, and Jack is Santa, doing to the North Pole what Mr. Potter did to Bedford Falls. Things do get fixed, though.

December 25, 2003: The Bartlets, President Jed and First Lady Abbey (Stockard Channing), are still dealing with the repercussions -- including with each other -- of the kidnapping of Zoey (Elisabeth Moss) the preceding Spring.  It is not clear whether daughters Liz (Annabeth Gish) and Ellie (Nina Siemaszko) will come to the White House for Christmas. In the end, they all do.

Jed remembers a trip to Egypt: "Saw the Pyramids and Luxor, and then headed up into the Sinai. We had a guide, a Bedouin man, who called me 'Abu el Banat.' And whenever we'd meet another Bedouin, he'd introduce me as 'Abu el Banat.' And the Bedouin would laugh and laugh, and offer me a cup of tea. And I'd go to pay them for the tea, and they wouldn't let me. 'Abu el Banat' means 'Father of daughters.' They thought the tea was the least they could do.""Abu el Banat" is also the title of the episode.


In the Los Angeles suburbs of Orange County, California, the setting of the teen angst drama The O.C., mixed Christian and Jewish families celebrate a combination of Christmas and Hannukkah, which they call "Chrismukkah," which is also the title of the episode. The way it's explained is supposedly hilarious. I say, "supposedly," because I've never seen it.


December 25, 2005: The West Wing skipped over an entire year of the Bartlet Presidency, and jumped ahead to the end of Year 7 for an episode titled "Impact Winter." While the President suffers a paralyzing multiple sclerosis attack aboard Air Force One, on his way to a state visit to China, there is concern that an asteroid might hit Earth, resulting in the worst-case scenario, the phenomenon described by the episode's title.

While both crises are averted, Josh realizes that Year 8 is going to be an election year, and someone has to take the baton for Year 9. He thinks he's found his man, Congressman Matt Santos (Jimmy Smits), and shows up on Santos' doorstep in Houston, as a "ghost of Christmas yet to come." There was no Christmas episode for Season 7/Year 8.

Elsewhere in Washington, The Jeffersonian Institute is quarantined due to an outbreak of Valley Fever. (This is a real fungus-borne disease, which affects plants, but can affect people as well.) This forces Dr. Temperance "Bones" Brennan (Emily Deschanel) and FBI Special Agent Seeley Booth (David Boreanaz) to focus on a murder.


Also, the Jeffersonian gang finds out that Billy Gibbons of the band ZZ Top (who plays a fictional version of himself) is the father of one of their own, Dr. Angela Montenegro (Michaela Conlin). This episode of Bones is titled "The Man in the Fallout Shelter."

Not in Washington, D.C., but in Washington State, in Seattle, Grey's Anatomy has its Christmas episode, "Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer." Dr. Isobel "Izzie" Stevens (Katherine Heigl) cares for a man who fell from his roof while hanging decorations, while Dr. Cristina Yang (Sandra Oh) performs a heart transplant on a boy.

December 25, 2006: The Doctor Who story "The Christmas Invasion" takes place, although it aired on the BBC exactly 1 year earlier, and features an Earth probe to Mars, which still isn't possible in the 2019 we know. It is the 1st full story depicting the Tenth Doctor (David Tennant), still suffering from side effects of his most recent regeneration.

An alien race called the Sycorax arrives, and demands that Earth surrender, or 1/3rd of its people will be killed. The Doctor solves this by getting the Sycorax leader to agree to a duel with swords, and The Doctor wins. This story is also the backdoor pilot for the spinoff series Torchwood.

December 25, 2008: For the 1st time, NCIS airs a Christmas episode. The NCIS Major Case Response Team, led by Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs (Mark Harmon), is asked to investigate a long-ago murder, of a sailor whose death certificate had been signed by Dr. Donald "Ducky" Mallard (David McCallum). Guest stars include Peter Coyote, Kay Lenz, and Eric Stonestreet, in the role that likely got him hired as Cameron Tucker for Modern Family.

Also on this day, another Doctor Who adventure, "Voyage of the Damned," takes place, though which aired 1 year to the day earlier, with Australian singer-actress Kylie Minogue guest-starring. A replica of the RMS Titanic is orbiting Earth, and the people who launched it intend to crash it into Earth. The Doctor manages to stop it.

December 25, 2009, 10 years ago: Claire and Phil Dunphy (Julie Bown and Ty Burrell) discover what looks like a cigarette burn on the living room couch in their Los Angeles house, and presume that one of their kids smoked it. None wants to admit it: Not Haley (Sarah Hyland), not Alex (Ariel Winter), not Luke (Nolan Gould).

So Phil, acting the disciplinarian for once, threatens to cancel their Christmas celebration -- to "Undeck the Halls," the title of this episode of Modern Family. To prevent this, Alex confesses, and gets grounded for a week -- starting the day after, meaning she can celebrate Christmas, but not New Year's.

It turns out, all 3 kids, including Alex, were innocent. The burn was caused by the reflection of sunlight through an ornament that Phil's father, Frank (Fred Willard) had sent them. But Alex was willing to face whatever punishment she would have to take to save Christmas for the Dunphy branch of the Pritchett family. Kind of a twist on The Gift of the Magi.

December 25, 2012: Mystery writer Richard Castle (Nathan Fillion) and New York Police Detective Kate Beckett (Stana Katic) spend their 1st Christmas together as a couple, after finding out who killed a man dressed as Santa Claus, on Castle.

December 25, 2093: The Alien prequel Prometheus takes place around this time. It is not a happy holiday.

December 25, 2265: A Christmas party is held aboard the starship USS Enterprise. Captain James T. Kirk (William Shatner) hooks up with a scientist, the aptly-named Dr. Helen Noel. This was referenced in the Star Trek episode "Dagger of the Mind," taking place the following year.

So Christmas does survive all the trouble of the late 20th, 21st, 22nd and early 23rd Centuries in the Star Trek timeline. But this is the closest the Trek canon has ever come to having a "Christmas episode."

Dr. Noel was played by Marianna Hill, born Marianna Schwarzkopf. Still alive at age 77, she was a cousin of Norman Schwarzkopf, the leading field General in the U.S. Army in the Persian Gulf War.

December 25, 2367: In the Star Trek timeline, Christmas is still celebrated in the late 24th Century, as mentioned in "Devil's Due," an episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation. The USS Enterprise-D is staging a play version of A Christmas Carol, and Lieutenant Commander Data (Brent Spiner) is going to play Ebenezer Scrooge. This was an inside joke, as Captain Jean-Luc Picard was played by Patrick Stewart, who had already staged his own one-man version of the story.

In the 1994 film Star Trek: Generations, Picard ends up trapped in the Nexus in 2371. The Nexus shows him a fantasy of a family, meant to be an alternate version of his own, at Christmas in his hometown of La Barre, France. But it wasn't real, and he got out, and saved the Veridian solar system.

December 25, 2801: Christmas survives on the TV show Futurama, which takes place at the dawn of the 31st Century, but it's been twisted in the last 1,000 years. In 2801, a robotics company created a robot Santa Claus, but a programming error gives him standards set so high that nearly everybody is "naughty," and not only must be denied presents, but must be killed. Thus, by...

December 25, 3000: People have to be inside before sundown to hide from Santa Clause, The episode "Xmas Story" aired on December 19, 1999, with Robot Santa voiced by John Goodman. The character made a 2nd appearance in "A Tale of Two Santas," airing on December 23, 2001. Goodman was unavailable, so Robot Santa is voiced by John DiMaggio (no relation to Joe).

December 25, 4226: The Doctor Who episode "The End of Time" takes place, airing on December 25, 2009, and concluding on January 1, 2010. The Doctor (still Tennant) is warned of the return of his ancient enemy, The Master (Jon Simm). His plan is to replace all of humanity's DNA with his own. He succeeds, with only Wilfred Mott (Bernard Cribbins) and Donna Temple (Eileen Mott) unaffected.

In the finale, the Time Lords intervene, led by their Lord President, Rassilon (Timothy Dalton). One thing leads to another, and humanity is restored, but The Doctor sacrifices himself by absorbing radiation. This causes his regeneration into the Eleventh Doctor (Matt Smith).

December 25, sometime in the 44th Century (4300 to 4399): The Doctor Who episode "A Christmas Carol" takes place, airing on December 25, 2010. It is a variation on the Dickens story, with the Eleventh Doctor (Matt Smith) standing in for Jacob Marley and the Ghosts, and Kazran Sardick for Scrooge. (Kazran is played at age 12 by Laurence Belcher, as a young man by Danny Horn, and as an old man by Sir Michael Gambon.

Tales of Christmas Past -- Music

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These songs debuted in the years in question, but very few did so on a Christmas Day. When that has been the case, I have said so.

December 25, 1719, 300 years ago: "Joy to the World" debuts. Isaac Watts wrote the lyrics, and Georg Friedrich Händel wrote the melody.

In 1971, country singer and actor Hoyt Axton wrote a very different song titled "Joy to the World," and the band Three Dog Night took it to Number 1.


December 25, 1739, 280 years ago: "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing" debuts. It was written by Charles Wesley, brother of John Wesley, founder of the Methodist Church, and both brothers were prolific composers of hymns.

Charles' original opening lines were, "Hark! how all the welkin rings / Glory to the King of Kings." Eventually, he changed this to, "Hark! the herald angels sing / Glory to the newborn King."

1741:Messiah is composed by George Frederic Handel. It premieres in Dublin, Ireland on April 13, 1742, and has its London premiere on March 23, 1743, at the Covent Garden Theatre (now the Royal Opera House).

Legend has it that when the "Hallelujah Chorus" was sung at the London premiere, King George II stood up, and everyone else stood out of respect. There was no record of this happening until 1756, and neither Handel (who died in 1759) nor the King (who died a year later) ever confirmed it. Regardless, it became a tradition for the audience to stand during its performance.

The "Hallelujah Chorus" has become connected with Christmas, due to its connection with Jesus. Except the Chorus, and indeed the entire oratorio, isn't about Christ's birth. It's about the end of the story: His persecution, death and resurrection.

December 25, 1744, 275 years ago: John Francis Wade debuts his carol, written in Latin: "Adeste Fidelis." In 1841, an English priest named Frederick Oakeley wrote English lyrics: "O Come, All Ye Faithful."

1760: "God Rest You Merry, Gentlemen" (or "God Rest Ye... ") debuts in print, with lyrics by James Nares, although the melody goes back to at least the 16th Century.

I've usually seen it, or thought I did, written as, "God Rest Ye, Merry Gentlemen." But the comma is after "Merry": It doesn't mean, "Relax, gentlemen, God says it's okay to be merry"; it means, "Gentlemen, let God provide you with rest and merriment."

There is a gender-neutral version: "God Rest You Merry, People All," but it just doesn't sound right. 

1780: "The Twelve Days of Christmas" was first published in England. As someone pointed out to me, this is the "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" of Christmas songs.

The traditional 12 days run through January 5, when the Epiphany is celebrated. The song is believed to be French in origin, and is a cumulative song, with each verse being built on top of previous ones, like "There Was an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly" and "There's a Hole in the Bottom of the Sea."

The gifts are usually the same in the various versions, but can be moved around. Usually, it's 2 turtle doves and 3 French hens, but early versions sometimes reversed this. The entertainers -- usually 12 drummers drumming, 11 pipers piping, 10 lords a-leaping and 9 ladies dancing -- are sometimes interchanged.

First of all, where did your true love get all that stuff? Second of all, where are you going to put it all? I wonder if George Carlin ever incorporated this song into his bit "A Place For My Stuff."

Originally, the gift on the 4th day of 4 birds were "colley" birds, meaning coal-colored, or black. Then, with a version published in 1909, they became "calling birds," and thus have they been ever since.

Up until a version published in 1966, the 5 rings were "gold," but have since been "golden." But, as recently as the 1979 TV special "John Denver and the Muppets: A Christmas Together," Miss Piggy sang the line as "gold rings." Five golden rings? I can see getting 1, but 5? One for each finger on the hand? That doesn't make any sense, unless the singer is Elvis, Liberace, or Elton John. Or maybe Pink, or Pauley Perrette in character as Dr. Abby Sciuto of NCIS.

There's also a theory that "five gold rings" was originally "five goldspinks," another name for a five-ringed pheasant. If true, it would explain why 6 of the 1st 7 were game birds common to England, but 1 wasn't: Actually, all 7 were game birds, usable as food; while the 8th gift was the maids a-milking, also providing food; and the last 4 were all entertainers.

The value of the gifts is, I suppose, in the eye of the beholder, but on the 12th day after Christmas, between the partridge, the 2 doves, the 3 hens, the 4 calling birds, the 6 geese and the 7 swans, there's going to be a lot of bird poop to clean up. At least you'll have a lot of servants, but good luck getting the lords to quit a-leaping to do it. Eight maids a-milking? Maybe she already has 8 cows, but this is not specified in the song. Without cows, the milkmaids will have nothing to do.

Also, what's so special about a partridge, in that it's the centerpiece of the song? I looked it up: In Greek mythology, in a fit of jealous rage, Daedalus threw his nephew Perdix off a hill, and the gods turned him into the bird in question. Hence, a partridge makes his nest in a tree that's not too high off the ground, like a pear tree. In French, the bird is a "perdrix," pronounced "pair-DREE," which may have confused an Englishman.

1788: Robert Burns, Scotland's unofficial poet laureate, writes "Auld Lang Syne," in Scots Gaelic. Somehow, it got associated with Hogmanay, the Scottish version of New Year's Eve celebrations.

Starting in 1929, Guy Lombardo and his big band, the Royal Canadians, played it just after midnight, first over radio and then on television, on CBS from a major hotel in Midtown Manhattan: The Roosevelt Hotel until 1958, and then from 1959 until 1976 at the Waldorf Astoria. Lombardo died in 1977, but network broadcasts kept doing it, including The Tonight Show on NBC and Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve on ABC (even now, after Clark's own death).

But the song has nothing to do with Christmas. So why do we associate it with December 25 along with December 31/January 1? Probably because it was used at the end of the 1946 film It's a Wonderful Life. So, blame Frank Capra.

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December 25, 1818: "Silent Night" is first performed, at (appropriately enough) the Church of St. Nicholas in Oberndorf, a town outside Salzburg, on the Galzach River which separates Austria from Germany. (If you don't count Salzburg, today home to 145,000 people, as a major city, the closest one is Munich to the west, not Vienna to the east.)

Father Joseph Mohr (1792-1848) wrote the lyrics (in German: "Stille Nacht"), and Franz Gruber (1787-1863) composed the melody. That's Franz Gruber -- not Hans Gruber, the German terrorist played by Alan Rickman in Die Hard, a film that took place on Christmas Eve 1988.

The entire song suggests that it was quiet and peaceful at the Nativity. But the Gospels make no mention of whether Mary screamed over labor pains, or whether baby Jesus cried. The Rosary Prayer, the "Hail Mary," states, "Blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb" -- suggesting that both "yon virgin mother and child" may have been granted holy exemptions to the usual pains each would suffer at birth.

In 1963, although Jewish, Phil Spector used it to close A Christmas Gift for You from Philles Records, beginning it with a spoken-word thanks to his listeners, while all the perfomers "woo'ed" the song in the background.


1823: "The First Noël" makes its debut, written by Davies Gilbert.

1824:"O Tannenbaum" makes its debut, written by composer, organist and music teacher Ernst Anschütz in Leipzig, Germany. "Tannenbaum" means "fir tree," as most Christmas trees were at the time. By the dawn of the 20th Century, Americans had made it "O Christmas Tree."

Its melody has been turned into the State Song of Maryland, and the former State Songs of Florida, Michigan and Iowa. In 1988, the film Moon Over Parador used its music for the National Anthem of the titular fictional South American country.

1849: "It Came Upon the Midnight Clear" debuts, written by Edmund Sears, pastor of a Unitarian Church in the Boston suburb of Wayland, Massachusetts.

1853: "Good King Wenceslas" debuts, written by John Mason Neale, who took it from a 13th Century song. This song, while certainly telling of genuine Christian behavior on the part of its subject, has nothing to do with Christmas. In fact, it takes place the next day: December 26, in addition to Boxing Day in the British Commonwealth, is St. Stephen's Day, the anniversary of the death of an early Christian martyr, and thus his "feast day" -- hence, "Good King Wenceslas looked out on the feast of Stephen."

There was a real Wenceslas, not quite a king, but Duke of Bohemia, born 907, died 935, assassinated by his brother (and, judging by his nickname, his total opposite), Boleslav the Cruel. And Wenceslas, too, has been declared a Saint, and is the patron saint of Bohemia, which is now in the Czech Republic.

1857: The most familiar Christmas song of all debuts, even though its lyrics have nothing to do with Christmas, and it was originally intended for the earlier holiday of Thanksgiving. James Lord Pierpoint, of the Boston suburb of Medford, Massachusetts, published it under the title of "One Horse Open Sleigh" -- not "Shay," as my mother always told me was correct. By 1859, it was better known as "Jingle Bells."

Guess what: This song has nothing to do with Christmas! The lyrics make no mention of Christmas. Or Jesus, by any name or title: Christ, Lord, King, King of Kings, King of Israel, King of the Jews, King of the World, King of Heaven, Prince of Peace, Emmanuel, Holy Child, Teacher, Rabbi, Wonderful Counselor... none of them.

Nor do the lyrics make any mention of presents, or a gathering family, or even Santa Claus and his entourage (Mrs. Claus, reindeer, elves, whoever else he's got up at the North Pole). "Jingle Bells" is about Winter. It has nothing whatsoever to do with Christmas. It could be sung at any time from December 1 through March 31.

In early 1966, ABC debuted the Batman TV show. By that year's Christmas, there were already the first variations that went, "Jingle Bells, Batman Smells." The standard version adds, "Robin laid an egg, the Batmobile just lost its wheel... " But then, there's a discrepancy. Some versions sing, "and the Joker got away." Others, to rhyme with "egg," make it, "and the Commissioner broke his leg."

Also debuting in 1857 is "We Three Kings," written by the Rev. John Henry Hopkins Jr., the rector of Christ Episcopal Church in Williamsport, Pennsylvania. He wrote it for a Christmas pageant in Manhattan.

The chorus contains the words, "Star of wonder, star of night." Great phrase, but there are no "stars of day." Yes, there is such a thing as "the morning star," but that's usually the planet Venus. There are people who believe that the Star of Bethlehem could only have been a "conjunction" of at least two planets (probably Venus and either Mars or Jupiter), looking like one big, very bright star. And, at the time of the birth of Christ, it might not have been known that these planets which looked like stars weren't actually stars. Even a king might not have known that.

Ah, but the "three kings" were never actually called kings in the Gospels. They were, however, called "wise men" in The Gospel of Matthew, Chapter 2. But even their number isn't divulged: It's presumed that there were 3, since there were 3 gifts that they presented: Gold, frankincense and myrrh. One man, one gift? That seems reasonable, but neither the Gospel nor the song specifically says that.

They have often been called scientists, astronomers or astrologers. If they were any of those things, they would have known what the Star of Bethlehem really was.

The song also says the kings are traversing "Field and fountain, moor and mountain." In this case, a "moor" is "an uncultivated hill land." But since one of the Three Kings is usually depicted as black, it might confuse people who know a "Moor" as a native of North Africa, such as the title character in Shakespeare's Othello.

December 25, 1862: Two of the most familiar Christmas songs debut. One is "Angels We Have Heard On High," written by James Chadwick, then Bishop of Hexam and Newcastle in the North-East of England.

The other is "Deck the Hall," which later became "Deck the Halls." The melody dates to 16th Century Wales, and was written in the Welsh language, Cyrmraeg. The English lyrics were written by Scottish musician Thomas Oliphant.

It includes the line, "Don we now our gay apparel." Once, this meant, "Let's all put on some bright clothing to commemorate this festive season." Now, it means, "Sweetheart, even Nicki Minaj wouldn't be caught dead wearing that!" I've gone on Twitter and asked a few people with rainbow flag icons in their bio if it's okay to still use the line. So far, all have said it is.

And I'm guessing "Troll the ancient Yuletide carol" means "Please sing an old Christmas song." It could be worse, I suppose: You could be calling a woman "Carol the ancient Yuletide troll!"

1864: "Up On the Housetop" debuts, written by Benjamin Hanby. The best-known version is by Gene Autry in 1953. The Jackson 5 also did a version that gets played on Yuletide radio.

"First comes the stocking of little Will. Oh, just see, what a glorious fill. Give him a hammer and lots of tacks. Also a ball, and a whip that cracks." Huh? Either Hanby just threw together a few words that rhyme, without thinking about how they would sound; or Santa has his priorities way out of whack; or little Will is into, uh, things that are too risqué to mention on Christmas. Maybe he's not so little.

December 25, 1865: William Chatterton Dix writes Christmas-themed lyrics to the familiar song "Greensleeves," turning it into "What Child Is This?"

This was also the Christmas season featuring the debut in published form of "Go Tell It On the Mountain," an African-American spiritual, included in a book of songs published by John Wesley Work Jr. (Work did not claim authorship for himself, which suggests that it predates his own lifetime.) His son, John Wesley Work III, was also a well-known black songwriter in his time. Neither, though, was related to a popular white folksinger and writer of the time, Henry Clay Work.

"Go Tell It On the Mountain" would also be the title of James Baldwin's 1st novel, published in 1953. The song would regain popularity in 1963, when it was recorded by Peter, Paul and Mary. Paul Simon and Art Garfunkel would include it on their all-acoustic 1st album in 1964, Wednesday Morning, 3 A.M.


1868: "O Little Town of Bethlehem" debuts, written by Phillips Brooks, then rector of the Church of the Holy Trinity in Philadelphia. It includes the line, "The hopes and fears of all the years are met in thee tonight." Oh, really? Doesn't the Gospel have the angel saying to the shepherds, "Fear not"? Maybe the fears of all the years are dispelled in Bethlehem, but the point (or part of it) was that, with the birth of this child, there was less to fear.

1882: "Away in a Manger" debuts. Its composer is William J. Kirkpatrick.

1892: The Nutcracker Suite premieres at the Imperial Maliinsky Theatre in St. Petersburg, Russia on December 18. The ballet, with music by Pyotr Tchiakovsky and a libretto and choreography by Marius Petipa, tells a Christmastime story of little Clara Stahlbaum, her doll, and a prince cursed to live as a nutcracker.

"The March of the Toy Soldiers," "The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy," and "The Dance of the Reed Flutes" have all become part of the lexicon of Christmas music.

1897:"The Parade of the Wooden Soldiers" debuts, written by German composer Leon Jessel. In 1922, English lyrics were written for it by Ballard MacDonald. The Crystals sang it on A Christmas Gift for You from Philles Records.

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1917:"The Bells of St. Mary's" debuts, written by Englishmen A. Emmett Adams and Douglas Furber. It is not about Christmas: The lyrics mention "red leaves," suggesting that it takes place in Autumn.

But in 1945, it was used as the title song from a Christmas-themed movie starring Bing Crosby as Father Chuck O’Malley (he'd won an Oscar in the role in the previous year's Going My Way) and Ingrid Bergman as Sister Mary Benedict, the most beautiful nun you'll ever see.

The original, Clyde McPhatter version of The Drifters sang it in 1954, and was included in the film Goodfellas. One of the acts that Phil Spector produced, Bob B. Soxx & the Blue Jeans (with Bobby Sheen singing lead), recorded it for Spector's 1963 album A Christmas Gift for You from Philles Records.

1920: The one Christmas carol familiar in English but originating in Poland makes its English debut: "Infant Holy, Infant Lowly" ("W Żłobie Leży"). It dates back to the 13th Century, when Poland was what passed for a world power at the time, and was translated into English by Edith Margaret Gellibrand Reed, a British musician and playwright.


1931: "Good Christian Men, Rejoice" debuts, written by Cyril Alington. Some have tried to make it gender-neutral, as "Good Christians All, Rejoice" or "Good Christian Friends, Rejoice." It's fairer, but it just... doesn't... sound right.

1934: Eddie Cantor debuts "Santa Claus Is Comin' to Town" on his radio show. The song was written by John Frederick Coots and Haven Gillespie. Versions by Gene Autry, Ray Charles, The Crystals (on A Christmas Gift for You from Philles Records), The Four Seasons, and Bruce Springsteen tend to get played during the holidays.

This is probably the most oft-cited "problematic Christmas song," because of the line, "He sees you when you're sleeping. He knows when you're awake." Uh-oh, this makes Santa sound like something out of a George Orwell novel: "Big Brother is watching you."

Another song debuting this year is "Winter Wonderland," by Felix Bernard and Richard Bernhard Smith. Richard Himber had the 1st recording. Dean Martin's version is the best known, and Darlene Love sang it on A Christmas Gift for You from Philles Records. But the song makes no mention of Christmas.

1935: On December 6: Arthur Warrell conducts the University of Bristol Madrigal Singers in a holiday concert at their University. In it, he includes a song that he has published under the title, "A Merry Christmas: West Country Traditional Song," but had never been published before, not even in the West Country of England, which includes the City of Bristol.

The 1st verse goes, "We wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year." This flies in the face of the traditional British holiday greeting, which is "Happy Christmas."

Starting in 1989, Hershey has used the song in a commercial, featuring Hershey's Kisses, in Christmas-themed red and green wrappers, simulating handbells.

The 2nd verse says, "Now, bring us some figgy pudding." I had heard the song all my life, but had never seen figgy pudding until November 23, 2016. On the way to spend Thanksgiving Weekend with my sister and her side of the family in Ocean City, Maryland, my mother and I got off the New Jersey Turnpike and stopped for lunch in Haddonfield, New Jersey. We found a British-themed gift shop, and among the foods they sold, not normally sold in America, was figgy pudding. And, as I said in the entry for 1526, it looked more like fruitcake than any pudding I'd ever seen. Had I a few extra bucks to spare, I would have bought some, just for the heck of it.

The 4th and final verse says, "We won't go until we get some." Where is a family that doesn't have any figgy pudding gonna go to get some on Christmas Eve (or Day)? If there's a Jewish deli open (which once saved my mother when she needed wild rice for Christmas dinner), something tells me they're not going to have figgy pudding, either. Is it even Kosher?

What's more, the person being sung to could easily say, "This is my house, and when I say you go, you go. Don't make me break out my Ralphie Red Ryder BB gun."

1937: This year marked the debut of "I've Got My Love to Keep Me Warm," written by Irving Berlin for the musical film On the Avenue, sung by Dick Powell to Alice Faye. Several successful versions were done that year, especially by the Ray Noble Orchestra, but the definitive version came years later, by Dean Martin. The song makes no mention of Christmas.

December 25, 1942: Bing Crosby has had the Number 1 hit in America since Halloween: "White Christmas," written by Irving Berlin. In 1955, he and Danny Kaye starred in a film of that title.

In 1955, the Clyde McPhatter version of The Drifters had the first rock-and-roll version. In 1963, Darlene Love's version opened A Christmas Gift for You from Philles Records.

1943: Der Bingle strikes again, singing "I'll Be Home for Christmas," lyrics by Kim Gannon, music by Walter Kent. When this song is sung, the singer starts with, "I'll be home for Christmas. You can count on me," the singer says. But he closes by saying, "I'll be home for Christmas, if only in my dreams." So, can she count on him, or not? She can't: The singer is meant to play the role of a soldier overseas.

1944, 75 years ago: The film Meet Me In St. Louis premieres. It was directed by Vincente Minnelli, and starred Judy Garland. They soon married. It includes the song, "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas," which has the line "Make the Yuletide gay." This is made even more problematic by the fact that Judy, though straight herself, became the ultimate "gay icon."

1945:"Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!" debuts, written by Sammy Cahn and Jule Styne, during the year's Summer heat wave in Los Angeles. Vaughn Monroe sang the 1st version, and his version was used to close the 1988 film Die Hard. But the song makes no mention of Christmas.

1946: Nat King Cole has a hit with "The Christmas Song," better known by its opening line: "Chestnuts roasting on an open fire." Let "Let It Snow," it was written in Los Angeles during the Summer 1945 heat wave. Another of the top singers of the time, Mel Tormé, was trying to get through the heat by thinking cool thoughts. So was songwriter Robert Wells, and he had a notepad next to his piano, with what became the details of the song. Mel found Bob, and the song was written in 40 minutes.

It closes with, "And so, I'm offering this simple phrase, to kids from 1 to 92: Although it's been said, many times, many ways, Merry Christmas to you." So, for everyone age 93 and up, you're out of luck? Sorry, Betty White. Tough cookies, Old Man Periwinkle.

Also this year, Gene Autry, dressed as Santa Claus, rides Champion Jr. the Wonder Horse in the Santa Claus Lane Parade, now known as the Hollywood Christmas Parade. He heard children yelling, "Here comes Santa Claus!" So he writes a song with that title. He did not, however, write "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer," even though it is the song most identified with him, even more than "Back in the Saddle Again."

Bob B. Soxx & The Blue Jeans sang it on A Christmas Gift for You from Philles Records. In 1990, Danny DeVito sang it on Saturday Night Live, backed by Dana Carvey on drums (he really is a good drummer), in character as Enid Strict, a.k.a. The Church Lady.

1947: This was the 1st Christmas for which "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" was a hit song, by Gene Autry. Johnny Marks set the poem to music. Marks, though Jewish, would write several Christmas songs, as we will later see.

Those reindeer were rotten bullies. First, "All of the other reindeer used to laugh and call him names.""Then one foggy Christmas Eve," Rudolph's prominent proboscis saves Christmas. "Then how the reindeer loved him." What a lousy bunch of fur-covered front-runners. I wonder if any of them ever said, "I'm sorry."

Also, if you ever hear Dean Martin's version, you might note that both the singer and the subject are known for having a red nose, albeit with very different causes. The Crystals sang it on A Christmas Gift for You from Philles Records.

I can't find any reference to the introduction of the silly call-and-response: "Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer (Reindeer!) had a very shiny nose (Like a light bulb!)," and so on. It appears to have started a few years later. Also, there are variations: In some places, kids sing, "like a flashlight!" and, instead of "You'll go down in history! (Like George Washington!)" they make it, "(Like Columbus!")

But in 1997, on the song's 50th Anniversary, Vivian Walsh published a book based on a misinterpretation of a line in the song, "All of the other reindeer... ": Her family dog becomes "Olive, the Other Reindeer." It was made into a Fox TV cartoon in 1999.

This was also the year of the debut of "Boogie-Woogie Santa Claus," perhaps the earliest depiction of a black Santa. It was written by Leon René, who had previously written "When the Swallows Come Back to Capistrano" and "When It's Sleepy Time Down South," and would later switch to rock and roll and write "Gloria" (the doo-wop classic, not the Van Morrison or the Laura Branigan song), "Rockin' Robin" and "I Sold My Heart to the Junkman."

Mabel Scott recorded the 1st version, but the best-known one was in 1950, by Lionel Hampton and His Orchestra, with vocals by Sonny Parker, normally their drummer.

1948:"Blue Christmas" debuts, written by Billy Hayes and Jay W. Johnson. Doye O'Dell is the 1st to record it. The following year, country singer Ernest Tubb had a big hit with it. Also having hits with it were bandleaders Hugo Winterhaler and Russ Morgan, crooner Billy Eckstine, and pop singer Johnny Mathis. But the definitive version was in 1957, by Elvis Presley. 

1949, 70 years ago:"Baby, It's Cold Outside," written by Frank Loesser, debuts in the film Neptune's Daughter, sung by Ricardo Montalbán (yes, Mr. Roarke and Khan!) to Esther Williams. The song makes no mention of Christmas.

This is one of the songs that someone (I forget who) once described as "songs Dean Martin liked to sing to get a woman to snuggle up with him by the fireplace," also including "Winter Wonderland,""Let It Snow,""I've Got My Love to Keep Me Warm" and "A Marshmallow World."

Now, I'm not gonna rip Dino, or say that these aren't nice songs. But they don't have anything to do with Christmas, either. They're about Winter, not about Christmas. And since we associate Christmas with Winter, regardless of Scripture suggesting that it didn't happen during Winter (not to mention that there's no snow mentioned in any of the Gospels), we associate these songs with Christmas, however erroneously.

But, in recent years, "Baby, It's Cold Outside" has come under intense scrutiny: It most certainly is not nice, and goes far beyond even naughty. The woman in the song says she has to go, her mother will worry, she's got a reputation to protect. And the man she's with keeps telling her that it's cold outside, that there's no cabs to be had, that she should stay. "Well, maybe just half a drink more," she finally relents. (Dean Martin with booze on hand? How out of character... ) And then, just 2 lines later, she asks, "Say, what's in this drink?"

So on the 12th day of Christmas, your true love gave to you... 12 roofies roofing? That's why this is known as "The Date Rape Christmas Song," and it is inappropriate on so many levels. At the very least, it's about a guy working way too hard to seduce a girl, and using Old Man Winter (if not the Christmas season itself) as an excuse.

This year also marked the debut of "Sleigh Ride," written by Leroy Anderson as an instrumental, and recorded by Arthur Fiedler and the Boston Pops. The following year, Mitchell Parish wrote lyrics for it, but the lyrics make no mention of Christmas.

The Ronettes sang it on A Christmas Gift for You from Philles Records, but the most familiar version is by Johnny Mathis. Johnny is now openly gay, and it had been rumored for some time before he came out, but I never believed it until a few too many listens to him sing, "Just hear those sleigh bells jingling, ring-ting-tingling, too... "

Come to think of it, the song also mentions "a winter fairyland." Johnny's a great singer, even at age 84, making him one of the last survivors of the canon of "Classic Christmas Songs." But this song does him no favors.

1950:"A Marshmallow World" debuts, written by Carl Sigman and Peter DeRose. The hit version is by Bing Crosby. Dean Martin had a hit version as well, and Darlene Love sang it on A Christmas Gift for You from Philles Records. Although the song is full of Winter imagery, it makes no mention of Christmas.

Also debuting this year is "Frosty the Snowman," by Jack Rollins and Steve Nelson. The 1st recording was by Gene Autry, as a follow-up (if not a sequel) to Rudolph. It also has nothing to do with Christmas, as the original lyrics make no mention of the holiday.

It wasn't until the 1969 CBS TV special, narrated by an animated Jimmy Durante (as if the great comedian wasn't already quite animated), that Frosty (voiced by another great comedian, Jackie Vernon) got an official link with Christmas.

The Ronettes sang it on A Christmas Gift for You from Philles Records, although Ronnie Spector's N'Yawk accent is in big contrast to the song's apparent small-town vibe.

A a fellow Yankee-themed blogger pointed out, the song begins, "Frosty the Snowman was a happy jolly soul.""Was"? Not "is"? What happened? Is he dead now? As in melted? Or is he just unhappy? Maybe he's only mad that he didn't get any royalties from the song.

Also weird about Frosty: If he's so afraid of heat, why does he have a pipe? And "two eyes made out of coal"? And, as was once pointed out to me, no matter how fat a snowman (and he did kind of resemble the portly Vernon), his walking wouldn't sound like "Thumpety-thump-thump." He's made of snow, walking on snow. It would sound more like "Swish, swish, swish."

This was also the debut year for "(Everybody's Waitin' for) The Man with the Bag," written by Irving Taylor, Dudley Brooks and Hal Stanley. Stanley was married to Kay Starr, who was the first to record it.

Starr was one of the biggest singers of the early 1950s. Billie Holiday called her "the only white woman who could sing the blues." In fact, this Oklahoman was 3/4 Native American, from the Iroquois tribe. Her hits included "Wheel of Fortune," and would later try to pander to teenagers with "The Rock and Roll Waltz." She also had an uncredited guest appearance on The Honeymooners, when her version of the dance tune "The Hucklebuck" was played.

1951: "Silver Bells" debuts, written by Jay Livingston and Ray Evans. It debuts in the film The Lemon Drop Kid, first by William Frawley (who had been in the 1947 Miracle On 34th Street, and would soon begin playing Fred Mertz on I Love Lucy), and then in its most familiar form, in a duet between Bob Hope and Marilyn Maxwell, who had often accompanied Hope on his USO tours during World War II and, then ongoing, the Korean War.

Livingston and Evans mostly wrote songs for movies, and their other songs include "Buttons and Bows" (also by Hope), "Mona Lisa" (a huge hit for Nat King Cole), "Que Sera, Sera (Whatever Will Be, Will Be)" (a big hit for Doris Day) and "Tammy" (a Number 1 hit for Debbie Reynolds). They also wrote the theme songs for Bonanza and Mister Ed, with Livingston singing the latter.

There's nothing wrong with "Silver Bells," as far as I can tell. In fact, it's my favorite secular Christmas song, and Elvis Presley did a really nice version, his best Christmas song, much better than of "Blue Christmas."

But there's one version of it that's not... quite... right. I'm sorry, but Wilson Pickett? The Wicked Pickett should not have been recording Christmas songs! It would have been like asking Karen Carpenter to sing "In the Midnight Hour"! (Then again, she did cover "Please Mr. Postman.")

And how neat -- and weird -- was it in December 2010, on Saturday Night Live, to hear Jeff Bridges, not known as a singer (though he and brother Beau did play pianists in The Fabulous Baker Boys), duet on this song with Cookie Monster of Sesame Street?

Also this year, "It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas," debuts, written by Meredith Willson, who would later write the Broadway musical The Music Man. Perry Como recorded it this year, with The Fontane Sisters, backed by Mitchell Ayers & His Orchestra, the backing group for The Perry Como Show.

There's a line, "Take a look in the five-and-ten." Sadly, there are now very few five-and-ten-cent (or "five-and-dime") stores -- many of which were in chains. Woolworth's, J.J. Newberry's and McCrory's all closed in 2001. Now we have "dollar stores" -- or, as they're known in Britain, "poundshops."

Another line: "There's a tree in the grand hotel, one in the park as well." Well, I should hope there's a lot more than one tree in the park! I know, I know, Willson meant that one of the trees in the park was a Christmas tree.

It gets worse: "A pair of hopalong boots and a pistol that shoots is the wish of Barney and Ben. Dolls that will talk and will go for a walk is the hope of Janice and Jen." The gender stereotypes are troubling enough. But putting a gun in a kid's hand is completely irresponsible, especially now, with the Newtown Massacre happening so close to Christmas a few of years ago.

One of these days, I expect to see a version of A Christmas Carol where the Ghost of Christmas Past is a grown-up Ralphie Parker with an eye patch, saying, "See? I actually did shoot my eye out!"

This year also marked the first recorded version of "The Little Drummer Boy," although it had been published in 1940. The first group to record it was the Trapp Family Singers. Yes, the real-life version of the kids from the musical The Sound of Music. The best-known version, though, is from 1958, by the Harry Simeone Chorale.

The 3rd verse has the line, "The ox and ass kept time." Sometimes it's sung as, "The ox and lamb kept time," in case you don’t want to use the word "ass" around kids, even to mean "donkey."

You know, call me a relic, call me what you will, say I'm old-fashioned, say I’m over the hill... but the drummer is the one who's supposed to keep time! Why does the little drummer boy need the ox and ass (or lamb) to do it for him? I know, he's just a kid, and he's certainly not responsible for the lyric, he's just telling the story. But this is another dumb one.

1952: "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" debuts, written by Tommie Connor, and sung by Jimmy Boyd, then 13 but singing in the role of a much younger kid. Later married to future Batgirl Yvonne Craig, he should not be confused with the Jim Boyd who played several roles, including J. Arthur Crank, on the 1970s PBS kids show The Electric Company.

Dumb Donald is so dumb! (How dumb is he?) He's so dumb, he appears to be unaware that the guy he sees in the Santa suit is actually his father! Or, worse, he appears to be not particularly troubled by the fact that his mother is kissing a man who (he thinks) is not his father. Either way, this is not a very bright kid.

Please, save the "Santa only comes once a year" joke. That, too, is too risqué.

To make matters worse, there's a version of this song sung by... the Jackson 5, back when they were first big. So, that explains Michael Jackson... I wonder if he ever asked a child to sit on his lap. These days, the best-known version is probably the one by The Ronettes on A Christmas Gift for You from Philles Records. Ronnie Spector was 20, and certainly looked like a grownup singing starlet, but if all you knew about her was her voice, she could pass for a kid.

1953: "Santa Baby" debuts, written by Joan Javits and Phillip Springer. Ah, the joy of Christmas, where everybody wants something. Usually several somethings. As Kanye West would say, "Now, I ain't sayin' she's a gold digger... "

But this song is also problematic on a practical level. A '54 convertible? Cars were huge in the Fifties. A yacht? A duplex? The ring could fit, the deed to the platinum mine could be folded up, but how exactly is Santa gonna get all that expensive loot into her stocking? He’s magic, the stocking is not! Okay, she does ask Santa to "slip a sable under the tree for me." I just got carried away, thinking Santa is only responsible for the stuff in the stockings.

Then again, considering the original version was by Eartha Kitt, maybe it's a long, slinky nylon stocking. As Bill Maher (on whose former show Politically Incorrect she guested a few times) would say, "Easy, Catwoman!"

To make matters worse, Eartha ended up dying on a Christmas Day, in 2008. James Brown, who recorded an album called Funky Christmas, also died on December 25, 2 years earlier. And the aforementioned Dean Martin died on December 25, 1994.

1954:"(There's No Place Like) Home for the Holidays" debuts, written by Robert Allen and Al Stillman, and recorded by Perry Como. Every place in this country has people trying to get back there for Christmas, because it's "home" to them. I have no issue with that.

This song first mentions that the man trying to get home to Pennsylvania (Como's home State), is starting out (or, perhaps, stopping along the way) in Tennessee. No problem there, either. But then he mentions people going "to Dixie's sunny shore." Even if you're not bothered by this glorification of the South (and I am), it doesn't fit with the whole "Christmas as Winter Wonderland" idea.

Also, when he sings, "From Atlantic to Pacific, gee, the traffic is terrific," whether he realizes it or not, he's using "terrific" in the original sense: Inspiring terror. If you've ever done Christmas shopping in Bergen County, New Jersey, where stores aren't permitted to open on Sundays, on the last Saturday before Christmas, you will understand. Christmas-shopping traffic and Christmas-travel traffic are not "terrific" as in "wonderful" or "jolly."

For me, this song closed with a big misheard lyric: It's, "For the holidays, you can't beat home sweet home." For years, I thought it was, "For the holidays, you can be home sweet home."

1955:"Nuttin' for Christmas" debuts, written by Sid Tepper and Roy C. Bennett. Several singers had hits with it this year, playing the part of a boy who's certainly ending up on the Naughty side of Santa's List. He doesn't take responsibility for his own actions, though, always saying, "Somebody snitched on me!"

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Now, we enter the Rock and Roll Era:

December 25, 1958: "The Chipmunk Song" is the Number 1 song in America. It remained the last Christmas-themed song to hit Number 1 -- until 2019!.

Johnny Marks strikes again. This time, despite being Jewish, and 49 years old, he has written 2 rock and roll Christmas songs. He brings Rudolph into the modern world with "Run, Rudolph, Run," a hit for Chuck Berry (although it's actually sung as "Run, Run, Rudolph"), and gives 15-year-old Brenda Lee her 1st hit with "Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree."

The title of the former is "Run, Rudolph, Run," but the lyrics say, "Run, run, Rudolph." Marks gave the song to Chuck Berry. Elvis Presley may have been the 1st rocker to record a Christmas song, with "Blue Christmas" the year before, but it was written in 1948, and Elvis' version hardly sounds like a rock and roll song. In contrast, the Chucker went out of his way to make "Run, Rudolph, Run" sound like a Chuck Berry song, and it works great. That's the (Johnny B.) good news.


The bad news is that the lyrics have Santa asking a boy what he wants for Christmas, and he wants a guitar. No problem there. Then they have Santa asking a girl what she wants, and she wants a doll. In the Ike Age, this didn't raise too many hackles. Now, it does. In 2006, Whitney Wolanin, then just 16 years old, recorded a new version with the genders reversed: The girl wants the guitar, and the boy wants the doll.

December 25, 1962: "Do You Hear What I Hear?" makes its Christmas debut, written by Gloria Shayne Baker and her husband at the time, the appropriately-named Noël Regney. They wrote it 2 months earlier, during the Cuban Missile Crisis, as a plea for peace.

It's a beautiful song, but it's got problems. Ignore for a moment that "Do you hear what I hear?" is from the 2nd verse, thus the title should be "Do You See What I See?" Ignore also the likelihood (based on Scripture itself) that Jesus was not born in Winter, on December 25 or otherwise.

In the 3rd verse, the shepherd boy says, "In your palace warm, mighty king, do you know what I know? A child, a child shivers in the cold. Let us bring him silver and gold." This is the Christmas song that gets my mother upset: She points out, if the child is shivering in the cold, forget the precious metals, bring him something more precious: Blankets. One would think that the shepherd boy, himself almost certainly poor, would figure that out.

And how did he get into the king's palace, anyway? Not that I want to take the king's side against a poor shepherd boy, but I would like to know. Maybe, like King David started out as, the boy was a crafty little shepherd who found a way around a seemingly impossible situation.

1963: Phil Spector's album A Christmas Gift for You had been released on November 22 -- mere hours before the assassination of President John F. Kennedy, which held sales down. The album had 13 songs, 5 of which are not Christmas-related.

Phil wanted an original song for the album, Jeff Barry and Ellie Greenwich, who had written (and would continue to write) so many songs he produced, wrote "Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)." Darlene Love sang it. Sonny Bono played percussion on the album, and if you listen closely, you can hear his eventual wife (and eventual ex-wife), Cher, singing backup on "Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)."

Hearing that Spector was going to do this album, Brian Wilson of the Beach Boys wanted to do a Christmas album, too. Only one song was recorded in time, though: "Little Saint Nick." This song is a guilty pleasure of mine: I love how they make Santa's sleigh sound like a hot rod.

But they have a little problem with counting: "Haulin' through the snow at a frightenin' speed, with a half a dozen deer, with Rudy to lead." Half a dozen is 6. There's supposed to be 8 -- 9, counting Rudolph. In this song, Big Red is 2 reindeer short.

Also premiering this year is "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year," written by Edward Pola and George Wyle, and sung by Andy Williams. It includes the line, "There'll be scary ghost stories... " I think Pola and Wyle got their holidays mixed up!

True, Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol has ghosts in it, but how old were you when you stopped being scared of those ghosts? Even when I saw my 1st version of it -- the 1962 Mr. Magoo version, when I was about 6 or so, in the 1970s -- I wasn't scared of them.

In 1995, Staples stores used the song for a commercial for its back-to-school sale, featuring a father dancing in the aisle with a shopping cart, happy that his kids are soon going back to school. The kids were not thinking it was so wonderful.

1964: The TV special Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer premiers. Burl Ives, in the role of Sam the Snowman, narrates, and closes the show with a new song written by "Rudolph" composer Johnny Marks: "Holly Jolly Christmas."

The song certainly seems jolly and innocuous enough -- until you get to the line, "Somebody waits for you. Kiss her once for me." Bump that! If she's waiting for me, I'm kissing her for nobody but myself! It reminds me of George Carlin's rant about the line, "Give her my best." (Said rant is too risqué to discuss in a Christmas-themed post.)

Also this year, The Beach Boys' Christmas Album finally gets released. It includes the aforementioned "Little Saint Nick," and original Brian Wilson/Mike Love songs "The Man With All the Toys" and "Santa's Beard."

It also has the carol "We Three Kings" and the standards "White Christmas,""Blue Chritsmas,""I'll Be Home for Christmas,""Santa Claus Is Comin' to Town" and "Frosty the Snowman" and closes with "Auld Lang Syne."

1970: This was the year we got the semi-official Christmas songs of African-Americans and Hispanic Americans. Donny Hathaway releases "This Christmas," which he wrote with Nadine McKinnor. It's been recorded by singers of all races, but far more black ones, and inspired a 2007 film of the same title with a mostly-black cast.

And José Feliciano releases "Feliz Navidad" -- Spanish for "Happy Nativity," or, effectively, "Merry Christmas." It helps revive his career after the unintentional controversy caused by his groundbreaking performance of the National Anthem at the 1968 World Series.

The only problem I have with this one is that it's incredibly repetitive. It was good of Feliciano to write a Christmas song that kids whose first language was Spanish can sing, but couldn't he have written a second verse?

He could have done a version for Quebec and other French-speaking places: "Feliz Navidad, prospero año y felicidad" -- "Merry Christmas, a prosperous year and happiness" -- could have become, "Joyeux Noël, prospérité en la année nouvelle," and it would have rhymed perfectly.

1971: John Lennon and Yoko Ono release "Happy Xmas (War Is Over," with backing from the Plastic Ono Band and the Harlem Community Choir.

They also rent Times Square billboards with the messages "Happy Xmas from John & Yoko" and "War is over (if you want it)."

1973: "Step Into Christmas" debuts, sung by Elton John, written by Elton and Bernie Taupin.

Also, "I Wish It Could Be Christmas Every Day" premieres, written by Roy Wood and recorded by his glam-rock band Wizzard. The title sounds like a nice idea, but it would be awful in concept. Look at all the places that are closed on December 25. If you need to buy something, you'll have to get it at 7-Eleven or Wawa or someplace like that. And you will have to get things. You think it's easy to shop for everyone you love for one day a year? Multiply that by 365!

1977: Bing Crosby taped a TV special, Bing Crosby's Merrie Olde Christmas, from England, with several British performers, including Leslie Hornby, a.k.a. the famously thin supermodel Twiggy.

He also recorded a duet with David Bowie, then still thought of by Bing's older, very square fans as a very weird glam-rocker. They sang a duet, with Bing singing "The Little Drummer Boy" (which he said he hated), and David singing "Peace On Earth," a new song written for the special by Alan "Buz" Kohan, Ian Fraser and Larry Grossman.

Fraser was the musical director for the special, and when he was asked, years later, if Bing knew who David was, he said, "I'm pretty sure he did. Bing was no idiot. If he didn't, his kids sure did." David agreed to the duet, saying, "I just knew my mother liked him." Afterward, Bing called David a "clean-cut kid, and a real fine asset to the show. He sings well, has a great voice, and reads lines well."

The recording, audio and videotape, was done at Elstree Studios in London on September 11. Still in Europe, in Spain to play a little golf, Bing had a heart attack and died on October 14. The special aired in the U.S. on CBS on November 30, and in the U.K. on ITV on Christmas Eve. It was a rough year for entertainers: In August, Elvis Presley and Groucho Marx had died within 3 days of each other; and then, on Christmas Day itself, Charlie Chaplin died.

1979: Paul McCartney releases "Wonderful Cheistmastime." How is it that former Beatle John Lennon, who dared to "Imagine there's no heaven... and no religion, too"– not that he was saying there was no God or Heaven, just asking us to imagine a world where people had "nothing to kill or die for"– wrote such a fantastic Christmas song, "Happy Xmas (War Is Over)"? While his former musical partner, Paul McCartney, one of the world's greatest songwriters and one of its greatest sentimentalists, facing that most sentimental of holidays, wrote such a weak one?

1984: "Do They Know It's Christmas?" premieres, written by Bob Geldof of the Boomtown Rats and Midge Ure of Ultravox, in response to news footage of the Ethiopian famine. They recorded it on November 25, with several British music superstars of the time, under the name Band Aid, and released it on December 3. It entered into the lexicon such lines as the chorus "Feed the World" and, as sung by Bono of U2, "Well, tonight, thank God it's them instead of you!"

It replaced Wings'"Mull of Kintyre" as the biggest-selling British single ever, holding the record until Elton John's Princess Diana tribute "Candle in the Wind 1997." It's sold 3.8 million units (from records to CDs to Internet downloads) in the United Kingdom alone, which, given the proportionate size of the countries (current populations, 67 million to 327 million), is like selling 18.5 million units in the United States.

In addition to Geldof, the other Boomtown Rats, Ure and fellow Ultravox member Chris Cross, Band Aid included Bono and Adam Clayton of U2 (but not The Edge or Larry Mullen), all 5 members of Duran Duran, all 3 members of Bananarama, all 5 members of Spandau Ballet, Boy George and Jon Moss from Culture Club, Rick Parfitt and Francis Rossi of Status Quo, Glenn Gregory and Martyn Ware of Haven 17, Sting, Phil Collins, George Michael, Paul Weller, Paul Young, Marilyn, and, not British but touring in Britain at the time, Jody Watley and all 3 members of Kool & the Gang.

This was also the debut of "Last Christmas," written by George Michael, and recorded by him and his partner in Wham!, Andrew Ridgely. It as a "double A-side," with "Everything She Wants," which hit Number 1 early the next year.

Where to begin with this one? First of all, it's by Wham! Second of all... Do I even need a "second of all"? The lyrics certainly suggest that it's the first gay Christmas song: "A face on a lover with a fire in his heart, a man under cover but you tore me apart."

There are "blue Christmas" songs -- "blue" as in sad, not "blue" as in "blue language" -- but this one, even if the "man under cover" is the narrator, not his target, is lame as heck. And did I mention it's by Wham?

This was also the year that "Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer" became a hit song. Randy Brooks wrote it, and originally performed it in 1978 with the then-husband-and-wife team of Elmo and Patsy Shropshire. (They have since divorced.) On the record jacket, Elmo appears in drag as Grandma.

What a terrible thing to have to think about at Christmastime! As B.J. Hunnicutt taught us on M*A*S*H, "A family's Christmas wreaths ought to be green, not black." On top of that, lemme tell ya somethin': If any reindeer had ever tried to run over my Grandma, she'd have popped him one, and then you'd know how he got the red nose!

The 2nd verse says, "We're so very proud of Grandpa. He's been taking it so well. See him in there, watching football, drinking beer and playing cards with Cousin Mel." But the video shows that Cousin Mel is actually a considerably younger woman. (Elmo played Grandma and Grandpa, while Patsy played Mel.) Gee, is Mel really a member of the family, or did Grandpa have Grandma offed so he could hang with his girlfriend at Christmas?

Given the backlash, the end of video shows Grandma, alive but a bit the worse for wear, staggering into the house giving the last line: "They should never grand a license to a man who drives a sleigh and plays with elves!"

In 2000 -- oddly enough, premiering on Halloween, on The WB -- there was an animated special based on the song. Grandma survives, and, as it turns out, Santa is not only innocent, but takes Grandma to the North Pole to nurse her back to health. It turns out, Cousin Mel is actually related to the family, but is a gold-digger, and seems to be more interested in killing Grandpa as well than in going after his money by marrying him. But Grandma has amnesia as a result of her accident, and it takes her until next Christmas to straighten everything out.

1987:"Fairytale of New York" is released on November 23, written by Shane MacGowan and Jem Finer of the London-based, but Irish-ethnic, rock band The Pogues, and sung by MacGowan and English-born Scottish singer Kirsty MacColl.

The song is more popular in the singers' native Britain than it is in the City in question, despite New York's still-strong Irish community. It is not a song whose lyrics are fit for this post. The short, clean version is that, for the couple in the song, the fairy tale did not come true.

December 25, 1994, 25 years ago: This was the 1st Christmas with Mariah Carey's song "All I Want for Christmas Is You." Mariah wrote it with Walter Afanasieff. It remains the most recent song to become a Christmas classic.

The song seems harmless enough. Indeed, it even seems to have the girl telling her guy to fight the commercialism of Christmas, that she doesn't need the kind of things that Eartha Kitt (and later Madonna) demanded in "Santa Baby."

But it also suggests that what she really needs is a man. So feminists tend to not like this one. To be fair, though, she doesn't say she needs him, only that she wants him -- which opens an entirely different can of worms. The song is rarely sung by a man to a woman, but when it is, it sounds a little stalkerish.

2000: Christian music group NewSong releases "The Christmas Shoes." The idea of this song is, on the surface, heartwarming: One of those, "And that's what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown" moments:

A guy on line at the cash register, having driven himself nuts shopping for Christmas presents, hears a kid tell the cashier he has to get these shoes for his dying mother, so that she can be presentable when she appears before Jesus, and he doesn't have the money for them, so the guy pays for the shoes for the kid. Certainly, a beautiful gesture.

On the other hand, it might be the biggest downer in the history of Christmas songs. This song isn't about life, it's about death. If it was "a real Christmas song," the mom should be so thrilled by such a beautiful gesture, from both son and stranger, that she gets better, and enjoys many more Christmases to come. Like a Hallmark Christmas movie would have happen. Real life tends to not work that way, but "Christmas miracles" do. Why not sing about that? After all, NewSong, are you Christian in just name, or in deed?

December 25, 2019: This past December 6, in anticipation of her 30th birthday on December 13, Taylor Swift released a song about the place where she grew up, outside Reading, Pennsylvania: "Christmas Tree Farm." We haven't had a decent new Christmas song since Mariah in 1994, maybe this will join the lexicon.

Somehow, Mariah's "All I Want for Christmas Is You" has done this year what it didn't do the first time around: Hit Number 1 on Billboard magazine's Hot 100. It is her 20th Number 1 hit, right behind the Beatles with 21 for the most Number 1 hits of any music act. She had already broken Elvis Presley's record for soloists with 18.

Did I forget any important ones? If so, let me know.

Tales of Christmas Past -- Sports

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December 25, 1851: James J. Thomson is born in Annan, Dumfries, Scotland. A halfback, he was one of the founding players for Glasgow soccer team Queen's Park, who stood as the Scotland national team in the 1st international soccer game, against England, at the West of Scotland Cricket Ground at Hamilton Crescent, in the Partick section of the west side of Glasgow. The game ended in a 0-0 draw. Thomson lived until 1915.

December 25, 1856: James Francis Galvin is born in St. Louis. The Hall of Fame pitcher was nicknamed "Pud" because he was said to have "reduced hitters to pudding." No word on whether it was figgy pudding.

He won 365 games -- a total topped by only 4 pitchers ever -- for the Buffalo Bisons (who went out of business in 1885) and the Pittsburgh team that would be renamed the Pirates before he retired, in a career that lasted from 1875 to 1892. That career curiously stopped right before the distance from home plate to the pitcher's mound was extended from 50 feet to the now-traditional 60 feet, 6 inches, thus making it harder on pitchers.


2006 National Public Radio article refers to Galvin as "the first baseball player to be widely known for using a performance enhancer." The Washington Post reported that Galvin used the Brown-
Séquard elixir, which contained monkey testosterone, before a game in 1889. However, no one then seemed bothered by his use of the elixir, and the Post practically endorsed it after the game, saying that Galvin's performance was "the best proof yet furnished of the value of the discovery."

He was poor, and couldn't afford to take care of himself, and died in 1902. He was only 45 years old. I can't find a reference to the cause of his death, so I can neither confirm nor deny that the steroid he took had anything to do with it.


December 25, 1864: Thomas W. Cahill -- I can find no record of what the W stands for -- is born in Manhattan, and grows up in St. Louis. He loved baseball and track, but when a soccer team from Toronto visited St. Louis, he got hooked on the sport.

On April 5, 1913, at the Astor House hotel in New York, Tom Cahill founded the United States Football Association, which later became and remains the United States Soccer Federation (USSF), the governing body of American soccer. He served as its 1st Executive Secretary, until 1921, when he left to merge 2 regional leagues into the American Soccer League. The Great Depression killed it in 1931, and he died in 1951, forgotten.


He would later be elected to the National Soccer Hall of Fame, and should be remembered as the father of American soccer.

December 25, 1871: Reading Football Club is founded in Reading, Berkshire, England. They played at Elm Park from 1896 to 1999, and since then at the 24,161-seat Madejski Stadium.

"The Royals" have not been particularly successful. They have won England's 4th division once, its 3rd division 3 times, and its 2nd division twice, but their best 1st division finish has been 8th place in 2007. Their best finish in the FA Cup has been the Semifinals, in 1927 and 2015, although they've gotten to at least the Quarterfinals 6 times, including 4 times since 2010. Their best finish in the League Cup is the Quarterfinals in 1996 and 1998.

They won the Football league Third Division South Cup in 1938, the London War Cup in 1941, and the Full Members Cup in 1988. This was a competition created after English clubs were banned from European play after the Heysel Stadium disaster of 1985, to give them some extra competition. It lasted a little longer than the ban did, until 1992.

December 25, 1875: "Young Tom Morris," an early golf legend, and the son of an early golf legend known as Old Tom Morris, dies in his native St. Andrews, Fife, Scotland. He is only 24. He had recently played a match in terrible weather, and probably caught pneumonia.

Although it would be a Scotsman, Alexander Fleming, who discovered penicillin, it would be decades before it could have saved Young Tom, who had also recently lost his wife and child in childbirth, and, between his grief and his illness, may have lost the will to live.


Old Tom Morris, born in 1821, lived on until 1908. St. Andrews, home of the Royal and Ancient Golf Club, and the site of 27 British Opens (but never, as yet, a Ryder Cup), is still "the Home of Golf," partly because of the legacy of the Tom Morrises.


December 25, 1877Henry Judah Trihey is born in Berlin (now Kitchener), Ontario. A center, Harry Trihey won the Stanley Cup with the Montreal Shamrocks in 1899 and 1900. Regarded as the best forward of his era, he was elected to the Hockey Hall of Fame, and died in 1942.

December 25, 1886: According to club legend, a meeting of workers of the Dial Square Shop of the Royal Arsenal in Woolwich, Kent (now part of Southeast London) is held at the nearby Royal Oak pub. The men involved had played football under the name Dial Square 2 weeks earlier, on December 11, defeating Eastern Wanderers 6-0 at Millwall's ground on the Isle of Dogs.

Now, the legend says, they formalize themselves, calling themselves Royal Arsenal Football Club. They will play their home games at the Manor Ground in nearby Plumstead.

We now know, thanks to research by the Arsenal History Society, that this story is not true. They uncovered a publication dated January 2, 1887, with an advertisement seeking matches under the Dial Square F.C. name, meaning that the change of name to Royal Arsenal had not yet occurred. But on January 8, just 6 days later, they used the Royal Arsenal name in a 6-1 win over Erith at Plumstead Common, not far from the Royal Arsenal itself.

They would turn professional in 1893, necessitating a name change, since a professional sports team was not permitted to have "royal" in its name. So they renamed themselves for their locality: Woolwich Arsenal. In 1913, they moved across the River Thames to the Highbury section of North London, and became simply Arsenal Football Club.



When they play at home right before Christmas, their fans are known to sing, "Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way! Santa is an Arsenal fan, and at Highbury today!" This is despite the fact that, in 2006, they moved from the old Arsenal Stadium, nicknamed Highbury, and into the Emirates Stadium. When their last game before Christmas is on the road, the fans sing, "Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way! Oh what fun it is to see The Arsenal win away!"


December 25, 1889, 130 years ago: Royal Arsenal play on Christmas Day for the 1st time, at the Manor Ground. They defeat Preston Hornets 5-0.

December 25, 1890: In Lancashire, England, soccer hooliganism, if not "invented," is first exposed to a wide audience. Blackburn Rovers play a home match at Ewood Park against nearby team Darwen. Rovers are scheduled to play West Midlands club Wolverhampton Wanderers the following day, Boxing Day, and so they field a weakened team. This infuriates the Blackburn fans, particularly as ticket prices had been increased for the game.

When the Darwen team appears, the fans urge them to leave the pitch, which they do, later re-emerging with their second eleven. Eventually, Blackburn and Darwen fans invade the pitch, pulling up the goal posts and threatening to wreck the press box. The police intervene, and finally manage to control the situation.


December 25, 1891: Royal Arsenal come from a 3-0 deficit to draw 3-3 with Sheffield United, at Bramall Lane in Sheffield, Yorkshire.

December 25, 1893: The newly-professional, newly-in-the-Football-League, newly-renamed Woolwich Arsenal host Burslem Port Vale, later just "Port Vale." Today, they are the only 2 teams in the 92-team Football League who are not named after a specific locality. Arsenal win, 4-1.

December 25, 1894, 125 years ago: In a manner of speaking, the 1st holiday-season college bowl game is played on this day. Certainly, it was the 1st game between teams from 2 different parts of the country. And it was the 2 men most responsible for the development of American football who set it up and opposed each other in it.

Walter Camp had been one of the 1st great college football players, at Yale University in the late 1870s. In 1888, he became Yale's head coach, and one of his players on that great team was Amos Alonzo Stagg. Between them, they invented pretty much every feature that turned American football from a game resembling soccer and rugby to the game that became so popular in the 20th Century.

Both men went West to start college football programs, Stagg at the University of Chicago, Camp at the newly-founded Stanford University in the San Francisco Bay Area. They played at the Haight Street Grounds in San Francisco. Chicago beat Stanford 24-4.

The Haight Street Grounds stood from 1887 to 1895. It was actually not at Haight Street, but at the southeastern corner of Stanyan and Waller Streets, in the Haight-Ashbury district that would become the seat of the Hippie movement in the 1960s, at the southeastern corner of Golden Gate Park, about a block from where Kezar Stadium would later be built.  


Also on this day, Woolwich Arsenal again host Burslem Port Vale, and win 7-0. Patrick O'Brien scores 3 goals -- not yet known as a "hat trick" in either ice hockey or association football.

December 25, 1895: Woolwich Arsenal again host Burslem Port Vale, and win 2-1. 


December 25, 1896: Woolwich Arsenal host Lincoln City, and win 6-2.

December 25, 1897: Arsenal lose on Christmas for the 1st time. It is against Tottenham Hotspur, then in Middlesex -- the Tottenham area wouldn't be brought into London, North or otherwise, until the municipal boundaries were redrawn in 1963, effective 1965. Until Arsenal moved to North London in 1913, they considered "Spurs" to be just another opponent. This time, though, Spurs win, 3-2 at the Manor Ground.

December 25, 1899: Woolwich Arsenal travel to Lincoln City, and lose 5-0.

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December 25, 1900: Woolwich Arsenal host East London club West Ham United, and win 1-0.

Also on this day, Albert J. Trace is born in Chicago. A musician who played minor-league baseball, he wrote songs with his brother Ben Trace, including "You Call Everybody Darlin'" and "If I Knew You Were Comin' I'd've Baked a Cake." He died in 1993.

December 25, 1901: 
Woolwich Arsenal host Lancashire club Blackpool. The game ends in a 0-0 draw.



December 25, 1902: Woolwich Arsenal travel to Staffordshire, and lose 2-1 to Burton United.

December 25, 1903: Woolwich Arsenal host Yorkshire club Bradford City, and win 4-1. At the conclusion of the 1903-04 season, Arsenal will be promoted to the Football League Division One for the 1st time.

December 25, 1905: 
Woolwich Arsenal host the defending Football League Champions, North-East club Newcastle United, and win 4-3.

December 25, 1906: Woolwich Arsenal host the defending Champions of the Scottish Football League, Celtic of Glasgow, and lose 2-0 in front of 15,000 fans, a big crowd for that era.

December 25, 1907
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Woolwich Arsenal again host Newcastle United, again the defending Champions, and play to a 2-2 draw.

Also on this day, John R. Rosenblatt (I can find no record of what the R stands for) is born in Omaha, Nebraska. Good enough in baseball to win a scholarship to the University of Iowa, he had to drop out to support his family. He went on to play semipro ball in Omaha for 20 years, played in a 1927 exhibition game with Babe Ruth and Lou Gehrig, and, in another, batted against Satchel Paige.

In 1948, Omaha elected him City Commissioner, and he got a stadium built. The College World Series would be held at his stadium, named for him in 1964, from 1950 until 2010, when a replacement was built. In 1954 and again in 1957, he was elected Mayor. Although Jewish, he was called "the supreme gentleman" by the city's Archbishop, Gerald T. Bergan. He lived until 1979.


December 25, 1908: Woolwich Arsenal visit Leicester Fosse, the club now known as Leicester City, and draw 1-1. In those days, it was a common practice for teams to play each other at one's ground on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day, and then travel to the other's ground to play again on December 26, Boxing Day. This was the 1st time that Arsenal did it, and they won the rematch in Plumstead, 2-1.

Also on this Day, William Benjamin Chapman is born in Nashville. A left fielder, he debuted for the Yankees in 1930, helped them win the World Series in 1932, played in the 1st 4 All-Star Games from 1933 to 1936, and led the American League in stolen bases in 1931, '32, '33 and '37.

By the last of those years, he was with the Washington Senators, as the dark side of his personality had surfaced. When the Nazis took over Germany in 1933, he took it as a sign that it was okay to yell anti-Semitic slurs and throw fascist salutes at Jewish fans, of which there were plenty in New York City, and, then, particularly in The Bronx. That season, sliding into 2nd base, he intentionally spiked Senators 2nd baseman Buddy Myer -- of Jewish descent but not raised in the faith. Myer fought back, and it grew into a 20-minute brawl, and both men were suspended for 5 games and fined $100.

It wasn't just bigotry that was wrong with him: In 1935, his 1st wife, Mary Elizabeth, filed for divorce, claiming what we would now call domestic abuse. In 1936, his hitting declining and Joe DiMaggio having arrived, Chapman was traded to Washington -- Myer's team. If there were any further incidents between them, they were not publicized. Ironically, one of the players the Yankees got in the trade was Jake Powell, who also turned out to be a nasty bigot.

Chapman managed in the minor leagues in 1942, but punched an umpire, and was suspended for the entire 1943 season. In 1944, with World War II having taken so many players, the 35-year-old Chapman was signed by the Brooklyn Dodgers -- which would retroactively become another irony. They traded him to the Philadelphia Phillies in 1945, and they named him their manager, and he continued to play until 1946, finishing with a lifetime batting average of .302.

But in 1947, when the Phillies went to Brooklyn to play the Dodgers, Chapman launched a fusillade of racial epithets at the Dodgers' new signing, Jackie Robinson. At the time, the press wouldn't get specific, only saying that it was bad enough that even the Southerners on the Dodgers rallied around Jackie.

The 1950 film The Jackie Robinson Story, with Jackie playing himself, showed a sanitized version of events. But the 2013 film 42 shows Alan Tudyk playing Chapman, and may well have set a record for the most utterances of "the N-word" by a white actor in movie history. (Tudyk's career has not suffered for this.)

Commissioner Happy Chandler warned the Phillies that there had better not be any incidents during the Dodgers' upcoming roadtrip to Philadelphia. It was suggested that a photograph be taken of Chapman and Robinson shaking hands. Chapman refused, so they posed together holding a bat. There were no further incidents.

Chapman was fired in the middle of the 1948 season -- not for the kind of person he was, but for losing. Only once more did he wear a major league uniform, as a coach with the Cincinnati Reds in 1952. Interviewed by Ray Robinson (a journalist working on a biography of Chapman's long-ago teammate, Lou Gehrig) in 1993, shortly before his death, he expressed regret over his actions, and pointed out that his son was coaching an integrated high school football team in Alabama: "Look, I'm real proud I've raised my son different. And he gets along well with them. They like him. That's a nice thing, don't you think?"

Also on this day, Joe Gregg Moore is born in Gause, Texas, outside Houston. A left fielder,"Jo-Jo" Moore played for the New York Giants from 1930 to 1941, helping them win 3 National League Pennants and the 1933 World Series. He was a 6-time All-Star, and retired with a lifetime batting average of .298. He lived until 2001.

December 25, 1909, 110 years ago: Woolwich Arsenal, by now in a financial meltdown that will see them just barely saved from going out of business in the Spring, against host Newcastle United, finishing up what is still the most productive decade in their history, and lose 3-0.

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December 25, 1911: Not that most people then rooting for Woolwich Arsenal cared about who the opponent was, but the Gunners lose 5-0 to Tottenham at White Hart Lane, in front of a huge crowd for the time, 47,000. The next day, the clubs meet again at the Manor Ground, and Arsenal win 3-1.

Also on this day, the 4,000-seat Patrick Arena opens in Victoria, the capital of the Province of British Columbia, with the 1st artificial ice surface in Western Canada. It is built by brothers Frank and Lester Patrick, who owned, ran and played for the Victoria Senators of the Pacific Coast Hockey Association. The team would later be known as the Victoria Aristocrats and the Victoria Cougars.

In 1925, by then members of the Western Canada Hockey League, they beat the NHL Champion Montreal Canadiens, and won the Stanley Cup. They remain the last non-NHL team, and the last team from British Columbia, to win the Cup.

Frank sold his share of the team to Lester, and led the Vancouver Millionaires to the 1915 Stanley Cup, still the only one won by a Vancouver team. In 1926, Lester became the general manager and head coach of the expansion New York Rangers. Neither was involved with the arena bearing their family name anymore.

On November 11, 1929, it burned down -- usually considered to be arson. It would take until 1949 for a new Victoria Memorial Arena to be built (not on the same site) and professional hockey in Victoria to be restored. In 2005, "The Barn on Blanshard" was replaced on the same site by a new arena, the 7,000-seat Save-On-Foods Memorial Centre. It is home to the Victoria Royals of the Western Hockey League.

December 25, 1912: Arsenal host Nottingham club Notts County, and draw 0-0. The 1912-13 season will be the worst in Arsenal's history, the only time they will ever be relegated to the 2nd division. Team owner Henry Norris, a real estate tycoon and a Member of Parliament, decided that the location in Southeast London, then having poor transportation links, was a problem.

So he bought land in Islington, in North London, and built a new stadium, officially named the Arsenal Stadium, but nicknamed Highbury after the neighborhood. It was much easier to reach for clubs both inside and outside London. Alas, it would begin life outside the top flight.


In 1987, the Docklands Light Railway began service, including to the area that was once home to Arsenal. That didn't help the team. But in 1913, the Highbury area included a stop on the London Underdround's Piccadilly Line.

In 1932, Arsenal manager Herbert Chapman convinced the company then running the Underground (what we would call a subway system) to rename the station closest to the stadium "Arsenal." The old tiles reading "GILLESPIE ROAD" can still be seen on the wall of the station, and motormen who are fans of arch-rival Tottenham Hotspur will, inevitably, use the train's public-address system to identify the station as "Gillespie Road" instead of Arsenal.

To this day, Arsenal are the only London-area team to have a stop named for them. With Tottenham having built a new stadium, there is a proposal to rename the White Hart Lane national railway station "Tottenham Hotspur," but it has not been acted upon.


December 25, 1913: Woolwich Arsenal travel to Yorkshire and beat Bradford Park Avenue (not to be confused with Bradford City) 3-2. At the conclusion of the season, Norris, noting that the club no longer plays in Woolwich, drops the locality from the name, and it becomes simply "Arsenal Football Club." Many fans will continue to call the club what they've been calling it: "The Arsenal." Many still do refer to it as such, writing and typing, Capital T, Capital A.

December 25, 1914: Upon hearing German soldiers sing Christmas carols in their trench on the Western Front of what was then called The Great War (later World War I), the British soldiers start to do so in theirs. Soon, the men on both sides come out of their trenches, and stop treating each other as enemies for a few hours, exchanging food, drinks, and trinkets. It becomes known as the Christmas Truce.

Legend has it that there was even a soccer game. Sorry, forgot to "speak English" there: A football match. It's not clear which side produced the ball, but according to most accounts that discuss the match, the Germans beat the English, 3-2.


This is the 1st time that Englishmen would be defeated by Germans at their national game. There have been many more. But, as England manager Alf Ramsey pointed out before the 1966 World Cup Final, twice in the 20th Century, the English (well, the British, and their allies) would beat the Germans at their 
national game (war), and on their soil no less.


Military historian Andrew Robertshaw (a technical advisor for the film version of the World War I story War Horse) says such a truce would have been unthinkable a year later: "This was before the poisoned gas, before aerial bombardment. By the end of 1915, both sides were far too bitter for this to happen again."


In 1997, Garth Brooks and Joe Henry wrote a song titled "Belleau Wood" for Brooks' album Sevens.  It describes a Christmas truce between American and German soldiers at Belleau Wood in 1917. But this is fiction, as the battle of Belleau Wood took place in June 1918, in Aisne, Picardy, France.


The Football League did not suspend operations until the conclusion of the 1914-15 season. On Christmas, Arsenal began a home-and-home series, defeating Leicester Fosse away 4-1 on the 25th, and 6-0 at home on the 26th.

December 25, 1915: With rosters depleted by the war, Arsenal travel to Upton Park in East London for what is, essentially, a reserve match, and lose 8-2 to West Ham United.

December 25, 1916: Arsenal travel to the Park Royal Ground in West London, then the stadium of Queens Park Rangers. They beat QPR 3-2.


December 25, 1917: Arsenal travel to Craven Cottage in West London, home of Fulham, and play to a 1-1 draw.

December 25, 1918: The war finally over, but the League deciding not to re-establish play until the following season (September 1919), Arsenal travel to East London, and lose 3-2 to Clapton Orient, the club now known as Leyton Orient.


It's a big day for Arsenal for another reason, as Bertram Mee (no middle name) is born in Bulwell, Nottinghamshire. A winger, he played for Mansfield Town and Southampton, but his playing career was cut short by injury.

This had also been the case for Arsenal players Tom Whittaker and Billy Milne, and Bertie Mee followed the path that each of those men took, taking what he'd learned in treating his injury and putting it to work as a physiotherapist, becoming Arsenal's, and in 1966 becoming Arsenal's manager. But before going to Arsenal, World War II intervened, and he entered the Royal Army Medical Corps.

He rose to the rank of Sergeant, but after succeeding Milne as physiotherapist in 1960 and being named manager in 1966, he remained a Sergeant through and through. He instilled discipline in an Arsenal side that was nearly relegated in 1966, a team that was not only terrible, but was perhaps the least interesting in London, what with Tottenham and West Ham having won major trophies in the decade, and Chelsea, Fulham and Queens Park Rangers all having gotten favorable notices in the media for their play.

In 1966-67, he handled the personnel management and the discipline, while assistant manager Dave Sexton trained the offense. After that season, Sexton was named manager at Chelsea, but former star right back Don Howe, another whose career ended too soon by injury, was named assistant manager, and he straightened out the defense. Arsenal reached the Final of the League Cup in 1968 and 1969, won the Inter-Cities Fairs Cup in 1970, and then, with a few adjustments due to injury that turned out to be very fortuitous, won both the Football League and the FA Cup -- "The Double" -- in 1971.

In 1972, with Howe having left for the manager's job at West Bromwich Albion, Arsenal finished 5th in a tight 5-team race, and lost the FA Cup Final. In 1973, they finished a close 2nd and lost the FA Cup Semifinal. Unfortunately, Mee saw every challenge to his authority, even minor ones, as betrayal, and acted the Sergeant too often. And he started a tradition followed by Terry Neill in 1980, George Graham in 1991, and Arsène Wenger in 2005: Breaking up a great Arsenal team too soon. Both of these problems manifested themselves in his sale of Captain Frank McLintock after the 1973 season.

Arsenal fell apart, and nearly got relegated in the 1975 and 1976 seasons, barely staying up both times. Mee was finally let go. He later served as Graham Taylor's assistant at Watford, and lived until 2001. He won 241 games as Arsenal manager, a record that stood until surpassed by Wenger in 2006.


December 25, 1919, 100 years ago: Arsenal, back in League play and promoted back to Division One, travel to Derbyshire, and lose 3-2 to Derby County. The next day, the teams meet at Highbury, and Arsenal win 1-0.

Also on this day, Cliftonhill Stadium opens in Coatbridge, North Lanarkshire, Scotland. It is the home of Albion Rovers Football Club. They have won Scottish soccer's 2nd division in 1934, its 3rd in 1989, and its 4th in 2015. But they have rarely been in the 1st division, under any name. They have never won the Scottish Cup, but in that 1st season, 1919-20, they got to the Final. They have won 8 Lanarkshire Cups, but the last was in 1987. 



Today, it is known as The Reigart Stadium for sponsorship purposes, and only the 1,572-seat Airdrie Stand remains open. Currently, Rovers are in the Scottish League Two, Scotland's 4th division. In the 1997-98 and 1998-99 seasons, Hamilton Academical F.C. groundshared at Cliftonhill, while their Douglas Park was rebuilt.

*

December 25, 1920: Arsenal go to Goodison Park in Liverpool, and beat Everton 4-2.

December 25, 1921: Melvin Anthony Maceau is born in Milwaukee. A center, he played for the Cleveland Browns, and helped them win the All-America Football Conference in 1946, 1947 and 1948, the last of these an undefeated season. He was cut before the 1949 season, when the Browns again won the AAFC title, before joining the NFL. Mel Maceau died in 1981.

December 25, 1922: Arsenal go to Burnden Park in Bolton, Lancashire, and lose to Bolton Wanderers 4-1.

Also on this day, Julius Neal Watlington is born in Yanceyville, North Carolina. A catcher, he arrived in professional baseball in 1941, then went off to World War II, and was wounded and received a Purple Heart. He appeared in 21 major league games, all with the Philadelphia Athletics in 1953, and remained at the Triple-A level until retiring after the 1958 season. He is still alive, 1 of 10 surviving players for that team before its 1954-55 move to Kansas City.


Also on this day, Stephen Wojciechowski (no middle name) is born in Fort William, Ontario, now part of Thunder Bay. A right wing, playing under the name of Steve Wochy, he played 49 games for the Detroit Red Wings in the 1944-45 season, and 5 in 1946-47. He continued playing professional hockey until 1955, helping the Cleveland Barons win the Calder Cup, the Championship of the American Hockey League, in 1951 and '53.

At 97, he may be the oldest living former NHL player, and the last to have played in the NHL during World War II.

Also on this day, Félix Loustau (no middle name) is born in Avellaneda, in the state of Buenos Aires, Argentina. A left wing, he starred on the Buenos Aires soccer team River Plate. With Juan Carlos Muñoz, José Manuel Moreno, Adolfo Pedernera and Ángel Amadeo Labruna, he formed a 5-man forward line known as La Máquina, "the Machine." They won Argentine league titles in 1941, 1942, 1945 and 1947.

Loustau also helped Argentina win the Copa América, South America's continental championship for national teams, in 1945, 1946 and 1947. He died in 2003. Muñoz was the last survivor of La Máquina, living until 2009.



December 25, 1923: James Gamble Nippert dies from blood poisoning, the result of an injury he suffered a month earlier playing football at the University of Cincinnati, in a win over arch-rival Miami University of Ohio. The son of a judge, and of an heir to the Procter & Gamble fortune, he had survived serving in World War I, only to face this fate. He was only 23 years old.

UC's stadium, built the following year, is named for him. His brother Louis Nippert would later own the Cincinnati Reds.

December 25, 1924: 
Arsenal go to St. Andrews Stadium in Birmingham, and lose to Birmingham City 2-1.

December 25, 1925: Arsenal host Notts County at Highbury, and win 3-0.

Also on this day, Ned Franklin Garver is born in Ney, Ohio, outside Toledo. In 1951, he went 20-12 pitching for the St. Louis Browns, the team that became the Baltimore Orioles 3 years later. This was quite a feat, considering that the Browns went 52-102 that year. Garver was the starting pitcher for the American League in that year's All-Star Game in Detroit.

Pitching in the major leagues from 1948 to 1961, with mostly bad teams, Garver finished with a career record of 129-157. But he must have had some talent, above and beyond his remarkable 1951 season, because the great Ted Williams said, "He could throw anything up there and get me out." He died on February 26, 2017, age 91.


Also on this day, Samuel Patterson Smyth Pollock is born in Montreal. Hired by the Montreal Canadiens' front office in 1959, he was general manager from 1963 to 1978, helping to build 12 Stanley Cup winners. He is in the Hockey Hall of Fame, and died in 2007.



December 25, 1926: Richard Wesley Manville is born in Des Moines, Iowa. A man brilliant enough to earn degrees from both Harvard and Yale, Dick Manville was also a major league pitcher -- briefly. He pitched 1 game, 2 innings, for the Boston Braves in 1950; and 11 games for the Chicago Cubs in 1952. He died this past February 13, at age 93.

December 25, 1927
: Jacob Nelson Fox is born in St. Thomas, Pennsylvania. Nellie Fox, a diminutive but crafty 2nd baseman, had his Number 2 retired by the Chicago White Sox, whom he led to an American League Pennant in 1959, resulting in his being named the AL's Most Valuable Player. Yankee pitching legend Whitey Ford called him the toughest out he ever faced, and author, radio show host and White Sox fan Jean Shepherd called him his favorite player of all time.

Along with his contemporaries Phil Rizzuto, Gil Hodges and Richie Ashburn, and the younger Ron Santo, Fox was one of those guys that everyone hoped would one day get into the Baseball Hall of Fame, but wondered why it was taking so long. Rizzuto lived long enough to make it, in 1994. So did Ashburn, in 1995. Fox didn't, dying of skin cancer in 1975 and getting elected in 1997. Santo didn't, either, dying in 2010 and being elected in 2012. Hodges died in 1972, and his supporters are still waiting.


Also on this day, Leo Roman Kubiak is born in Toledo, Ohio. He played professional baseball, but didn't make the major leagues. He did make them in basketball, playing for the Waterloo Hawks of Iowa from 1948 to 1950. He is one of the last surviving players from the founding days of the NBA.

December 25, 1928: Arsenal play their 1st Christmas Day match under manager Herbert Chapman. They lose 5-2, away to Blackburn Rovers.

December 25, 1929, 90 years ago: Arsenal, on the way to their 1st major trophy (the 1930 FA Cup), travel to Fratton Park, and beat Hampshire team Portsmouth 1-0 on a goal by their diminutive but prolific inside left Alex James.


*

December 25, 1930: Arsenal travel to Manchester, and beat Manchester City at Maine Road, 4-1. Goals by Joe Hulme, David Jack, Jack Lambert (no relation to the later Pittsburgh Steelers linebacker of the same name), and a penalty by Cliff Bastin. This is the start of a 3-game stretch where Arsenal score 14 goals, on the way to their 1st League title in April 1931.

Also on this day, Emanoul Aghassian is born in Salma, in the Persian Empire, present-day Iran. He represented Iran as a boxer in the Olympics of 1948 in London and 1952 in Helsinki, Finland. After the 1952 Games, he and his brother Samuel moved to Chicago. Emanoul changed his name to the more American-sounding Mike Agassi. He later took a job at the Tropicana Hotel in Las Vegas, where he raised his children, including his son Andre Agassi.

Andre not only won "the career Grand Slam," winning 4 Australian Opens, 2 U.S. Opens, and Wimbledon and the French Open once each, but, in Atlanta in 1996, won what had eluded his father: An Olympic Gold Medal. Mike is still alive, age 88.

December 25, 1931: Arsenal travel to Yorkshire, and lose to Sheffield United 4-1 at Bramall Lane. They go on to a dubious near-Double, finishing 2nd in the League and losing the FA Cup Final.

Also on this day, Charles Grice Driesell is born in Norfolk, Virginia. Although naturally lefthanded, he was nicknamed for country singer William "Lefty" Frizzell, a star in his youth. He played basketball at Duke University before that became a big deal, then became a coach, starting at his alma mater in Norfolk, Granby High School.

In 1960, he got his 1st college job, at Davidson College in Davidson, North Carolina, getting them to what we would now call the NCAA Sweet Sixteen in 1966 and the Elite Eight in 1968. That got the attention of the University of Maryland, and they hired him in 1969.

On July 12, 1973, Lefty Driesell and 2 friends were surf fishing in Bethany Beach, Delaware, when they saw a fire at a resort building. They rushed to shore, and Driesell broke down a door and rescued at least 10 children. It would be another half an hour before the firemen arrived. He said he wasn't a hero: "It was just lucky that we were fishing right in front of the houses."

He built a pretty good coaching record in College Park, too. He reached the Sweet Sixteen 5 times, and the Elite Eight in 1973 and 1975. He won them Atlantic Coast Conference Championships in the regular season in 1975 and 1980, and in the Tournament in 1984, led by a powerful sophomore forward named Len Bias. Other star players of his included Tom McMillen, Len Elmore, John Lucas, Albert King and Buck Williams.

In 1986, Bias had a chance to be taken as the Number 1 pick in the NBA Draft. He wasn't: Brad Daugherty of North Carolina was, by the Cleveland Cavaliers. But the Boston Celtics had traded up for the Number 2 pick, and chose Bias. When asked about him, Driesell said, "Leonard's only vice is ice cream." This turned out not to be the case. It was also revealed, after Bias' cocaine-induced death, that he'd used up his eligibility. The scandal forced Driesell to resign.

He returned to the coaching ranks in 1988, with James Madison University of Harrisonburg, Virginia. He led them to 5 Conference Championships. He closed his career at Georgia State University, and led them to 4 Conference Championships. In so doing, he became the 1st coach to win more than 100 games at 4 different NCAA Division I schools. His final record, from 1960 to 2003, was 786-394. He is still alive, and was just elected to the Basketball Hall of Fame.


December 25, 1933: Having won the League the season before, Arsenal travel to Yorkshire, and beat Leeds United 1-0 at Elland Road. Bastin scores. Despite Chapman's death 2 weeks after Chritmas, they win the League again under interim manager Joe Shaw.

Also on this day, Benjamin Basil Heatley is born in Kenilworth, Warwickshire, England. On June 13, 1964, Basil Heatley won the Polytechnic Marathon in London, running it in 2 hours, 13 minutes, 55 seconds to break the world record for the marathon. But he would only win a Silver Medal in the 1964 Olympics in Tokyo, as the man whose record he broke, 1960 Olympic Gold Medalist Abebe Bikila of Ethiopia, reclaimed the Gold and the record. Heatley this past August 3, at age 85.

December 25, 1934: Now managed by George Allison, Arsenal defeat Lancashire club Preston North End 5-3, at Highbury. Hulme scores 2, Bastin 1, Ray Bowden 1, and they also get the benefit of an own goal by Preston. The next day, Preston get revenge, 2-1 at their home ground of Deepdale. Arsenal go on to make it 3 straight League titles.

In the 1st season of the Football League, 1888-89, Preston went unbeaten, winning 18 games, drawing 4 and losing none. They also won the FA Cup, making the 1st "Double." An unbeaten League season would not happen again until Arsenal in 2003-04: As broadcaster Alan Parry said, "They were, quite literally, unbeatable: Played 38, won 24, drawn 12, lost exactly none!"


Also on this day, Santa Anita Park opens in Los Angeles. Still the West Coast's premier thoroughbred horse racing track, it annually hosts the Santa Anita Derby, one of the warmup races for the Triple Crown. It has also hosted the Breeders' Cup more times than any other track, 10: 1986, 1993, 2003, 2008, 2009, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2016 and 2019.


It's yet another location which, due to its proximity to Hollywood, has frequently served as a filming location for its usual subject: The Marx Brothers' A Day at the Races and the original version of A Star Is Born in 1937, and The Story of Seabiscuit in 1949. Seabiscuit had famously won his last race there, the 1940 Santa Anita Handicap. The ill-fated 2012 TV series Luck was also filmed there.

It also includes statues of several horses, including Seabiscuit, John Henry and Zenyatta; and jockeys such as Johnny Longden, Bill Shoemaker and Laffit Pincay Jr.

December 25, 1935: Liverpool win at Highbury, 2-1. Arsenal go on to win the 1936 FA Cup.

December 25, 1936: Arsenal host Preston, and win 4-1, on goals by Jackie Milne, Alf Kirchen, and 2 by Ted Drake.

December 25, 1938: Jack Edwin Hamilton is born in Burlington, Iowa. He went 32-40 in 8 seasons as a major league pitcher, including for the Mets in 1966 and 1967. However, the Mets traded him to the California Angels, and on August 18, 1967, he hit Tony Conigliaro of the Boston Red Sox in the head, ruining his career.

It was not intentional: He had no reputation for hitting batters, hit only 1 other batter during the course of the season, and someone had thrown a smoke bomb onto the field a few minutes earlier, and the smoke hadn't fully cleared, making it harder to see the ball during a night game.


Hamilton never recovered from the stigma of having hit Tony C, and retired after 2 more seasons. He later ran restaurants in his native Iowa, and in Branson, Missouri, where he died in 2018, at age 79.


Also on this day, Joseph Jean-Noel Yves Picard in Montréal, Québec. A defenseman, he won the Stanley Cup with the 1965 Montreal Canadiens, and reached the Stanley Cup Finals 3 more times, with the 1968, 1969 and 1970 St. Louis Blues.

He is best remembered for his unsuccessful attempt to trip Bobby Orr of the Boston Bruins up in overtime of Game 4 of the 1970 Finals, allowing Orr to score the Cup-winning goal, and putting Picard into perhaps the most famous photograph in the history of hockey.

Noel Picard was a member of 2 1st-year NHL expansion teams, the 1967-68 Blues and the 1972-73 Atlanta Flames. He later became a broadcaster for the Blues, and ran a restaurant in the suburbs of St. Louis. He died in 2017.

December 25, 1939, 80 years ago: With World War II underway, the Football League has again suspended operations, and won't start again until the 1946-47 season (although the Football Association will play a full FA Cup tournament in 1945-46). Arsenal host East London team Clapton Orient, and win 3-0. Kirchen, Jack Crayston and Reg Lewis score the goals. Clapton Orient is now known as Leyton Orient, nicknamed just "Orient," or "The O's."


*

December 25, 1940: South Side Park burns down in Chicago. As far as anyone knows, the fire is not purposely set. It was the 1st home of the American League's Chicago White Sox (1901 to 1910), and of the Negro Leagues' Chicago American Giants (1910 to 1940). The American Giants won 7 Pennants while playing there, the White Sox 2.

Also on this day, under the wartime conditions of depleted rosters, Tommy Lawton plays for Everton against Liverpool at Anfield in the morning. Liverpool win, 3-1. Then he is asked to play as a guest player for Merseyside club Tranmere Rovers at nearby Cheshire club Crewe Alexandra in the afternoon. 
As he recalled, "The Tranmere people came into the dressing room, and asked if anyone wanted to play, as they were two men short. I said, 'Go on, I'll help you out.' And I did."


I can't find a record of the result of the Tranmere-Crewe match, but Tranmere beat Liverpool 3-2 just 3 days later, and Crewe went on to finish 36th and last in the war-forced setup of the Northern Regional Championship in the 1940-41 season, winning only 2 games, drawing 3 and losing 19. Tranmere finished 27th, suggesting that Tranmere likely won the game. Liverpool 16th, and Everton, winners of the last prewar League title, 5th. Preston North End won.


On Christmas Day 1940, Lawton played a full 90 minutes in the afternoon, after having already done so in the morning. Given the heavy leather balls and ragged pitches (especially in Winter) of the era, this may qualify as a Christmas miracle.

Just 4 days after Christmas, the Luftwaffe bombed the Rolls-Royce factory in Crewe, which had been making Spitfire planes for the Royal Air Force.


Also on this day, Arsenal lose 4-2 away to West Ham United. They finished 4th in the Southern Regional, the Hammers 2nd, and 
Crystal Palace of Southeast London won.


December 25, 1941: Arsenal host Fulham and win 2-0, on goals by Kirchen and Lewis. Although both men's best years happened during The War (always Capital T, Capital W), Lewis would score twice to win Arsenal the 1950 FA Cup Final.

Also on this day, David Wayne Parks is born outside Dallas in Muenster, Texas. He starred as an end at Texas Tech, and was the 1st pick in the 1964 NFL Draft, the 1st receiver so honored, by the San Francisco 49ers. In 1965, he led the NFL in receptions, receiving yards and receiving touchdowns, the "receiving triple crown."

He played pro ball until 1974, making 3 Pro Bowls, catching 360 passes for 5,619 yards and 44 touchdowns. He is in the College Football and Texas Sports Halls of Fame. He went on to work in law enforcement, and invented a garden tool, the Speedy Weedy. He died on August 7, 2019. 

Also on this day, Noël Le Graët is born in Bourbriac, Côtes-d'Armor, France. Since 2011, he has been President of the French Football Federation (FFF), the governing body of French soccer. Under his leadership, France has advanced to the Final of Euro 2016, losing to Portugal, and won the 2018 World Cup, beating Croatia in the Final.

December 25, 1942: Arsenal travel to Stamford Bridge in West London, and lose 5-2 to Chelsea.

Also on this day, Françoise Dürr is born in Algiers, in what was then French Algeria. She was one of the top women's tennis players of the late 1960s and early 1970s, particularly in doubles. In singles, she won the 1967 French Open. She is still alive.

December 25, 1943: Arsenal travel to The Den in South London, and beat Millwall 5-1. Lewis scores twice. Goals are also scored by Drake, Denis Compton and Bobby Flavell.

The brothers Leslie and Denis Compton were accomplished athletes, both of whom played soccer for Arsenal (Les was better at that sport) and cricket for Middlesex County Cricket Club (Denis was better at that one).

Also on this day, Howard James Twilley Jr. is born in Houston. In 1965, playing wide receiver for the University of Tulsa, he was runner-up to USC running back Mike Garrett for the Heisman Trophy. He became an original 1966 Miami Dolphin, and was the only one to make it to their undefeated 1972 team that won Super Bowl VII, also winning Super Bowl VIII.

He later ran a string of Athlete's Foot sporting-goods stores, and then an investment firm, and is in the Oklahoma Sports Hall of Fame. He is still alive.

December 25, 1944, 75 years ago: Arsenal travel to Griffin Park in West London, and draw 1-1 with Brentford.

Also on this day, Jair Ventura Filho is born in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. Known as Jairzinho and nicknamed O Furacão (The Hurricane), he starred with hometown club Botafogo and the Brazilian national soccer team, and won World Cups for his country in 1962 and 1970. He is still alive, and currently manages a Rio-based team in the lower divisions of Brazil's league system.

Also on this day, Jonathan Edwards (no middle name) is born in St. Louis. In 1977, John Edwards became the lead singer of the soul group The Spinners. A stroke forced him to retire in 2000. Nevertheless, he is still alive.


December 25, 1945: W
ith World War II over and victory belonging to the Allies, Arsenal travel to Wales, and lose 2-1 to Newport County at Rodney Parade in Newport.

Also on this day, Kenneth Michael Stabler is born in Foley, Alabama. "The Snake" was backup quarterback to Joe Namath at the University of Alabama in their 1964 National Championship season, then led them to another title in 1965. He guided the Oakland Raiders to victory in Super Bowl XI in 1977.

He once said, "There's nothing wrong with reading a playbook by the light of a jukebox." The writer Jack London, also a noted party animal in Oakland, once wrote, "I would rather be ashes than dust. I would rather that my spark should burn out in a brilliant blaze than be stifled by dry rot. I would rather be a superb meteor than a sleepy, permanent planet." Someone once read those words to Stabler, and asked him what he thought they meant. Stabler paused a moment, then said, "Throw deep." He may have been reckless, but he was smart.


Somehow, in spite of all his carousing, Ken Stabler lived until 2015 -- but not long enough to be elected to the Pro Football Hall of Fame, which elected him in a sympathy vote right after his death.

December 25, 1946: The Buffalo Bisons of the National Basketball League announce that they're moving to the "Tri-Cities" of Rock Island and Moline, Illinois, and Davenport, Iowa, and becoming the Tri-Cities Blackhawks. Later, Bettendorf, Iowa will be added to the region's traditional name, making it the "Quad Cities."

The Blackhawks -- like the Chicago hockey team, named for the famous early 19th Century Native chief of the region -- play in Moline for 5 years, but in 1951, they moved again, becoming the Milwaukee Hawks. In 1955, they became the St. Louis Hawks, reaching 4 NBA Finals including winning the 1958 NBA Championship. In 1968, despite having won a Division title, they moved again, becoming the Atlanta Hawks. Given their attendance problems lately, they may have to move again.


Also on this day, Arsenal host Portsmouth, and win 2-1 on goals by Jimmy Logie and Ronnie Rooke. Rooke was 35, old for a forward and very old for a good one. But in 1947-48, the season in which he turned 36, he scored 33 goals to help Arsenal win the League.

That total remains the most any Arsenal player has scored in a post-World War II season, and only 2 Arsenal players since have scored 30 in a League season: Thierry Henry in 2003-04 and Robin van Persie in 2011-12. Rookie did not live to see either achievement, dying in 1985.

Also on this day, Lawrence Richard Csonka is born in Stow, Ohio, outside Akron. One of many star running backs at Syracuse University, he rushed for 8,081 yards and 64 touchdowns for the Miami Dolphins. He was a 3-time All-Pro, helped the Dolphins to an undefeated season in 1972, capped by Super Bowl VII, and was the MVP of Super Bowl VIII.

He left the Dolphins to play in the World Football League, but that didn't work out. He came to the New York Giants, but that didn't work out, either, culminating in the 1978 play known as "The Miracle of the Meadowlands." He came back to the Dolphins for 1 more season and retired. He has been elected to the College and Pro Football Halls of Fame. The Dolphins retired his Number 39. He is still alive.

Also on this day, Gene William Lamont is born in Rockford, Illinois. A catcher, he reached the postseason with the 1972 Detroit Tigers, but was never more than a backup. He is now best remembered as a coach, frequently working under Jim Leyland.

He reached the postseason as a coach with the Pittsburgh Pirates in 1990 and '91, as manager of the Chicago White Sox in 1993 (and was named American League Manager of the Year), the Houston Astros in 2004, and the Tigers in 2006, '09, '11, '12, '13 and '14. He has also managed the Pirates, and now works in the Kansas City Royals' front office.

Also on this day, John Boyle (no middle name) is born in Motherwell, Scotland. A midfielder, he reached the 1967 FA Cup Final with West London team Chelsea, but lost; and was injured for their 1970 FA Cup Final win. But he got a winner's medal for their 1971 win in the European Cup Winners' Cup.

He later came to America, and both played for and managed the Tampa Bay Rowdies, winning the NASL Championship as a player in 1975, Tampa Bay's 1st title in any sport. He is still alive.


December 25, 1947: Arsenal, now managed by former player and physiotherapist Tom Whittaker, beat Liverpool 3-0 at Anfield, on 2 goals by Rooke and 1 by Don Roper. As I said, Arsenal go on to win the 1948 League title.

December 25, 1948: Arsenal host East Midlands team Derby County, and the teams play to a 3-3 draw.

Also on this day, Joel Natalino Santana is born in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, his middle name coming from his birth on Christmas (Natal in Portuguese). A centreback, he starred for hometown team Vasco da Gama, winning the national league (Campeonato Brasileiro) in 1974.

He moved around a lot as a manager, leading Al Wasl to the league title in the United Arab Emirates in 1982, 1983 and 1985. He returned home and won Brazilian State Championships for Vasco in 1992 and 1993, Bahia in 1994, for Rio team Fluminense (or "Flu") in 1995, for Flu's arch-rivals Flamengo (or "Fla") in 1996, for Rio team Botafogo in 1997, for Bahia again in 1999, Vitória in 2003, Fla again in 2008, and Botafogo again in 2010.

But his biggest achievement was leading Vasco to the league title in 2000, making him one of the few managers in any country to win a league title for the same team as a player and a manager. He now manages an amateur team in the Los Angeles suburbs.

*


December 25, 1950: Arsenal host Stoke City and their legendary midfielder, Stanley Matthews, the man known as the Wizard of Dribble. Stoke win 3-0.

Also on this day, Jesus Manuel Marcano Trillo is born in Caripito, Venezuela. A child born on December 25, and named Jesus? Not just Jesus, but Jesus Manuel -- as in short for "Emmanuel," meaning "God with us"? He's better known as Manny Trillo, the 2nd baseman of the 1980 World Champion Philadelphia Phillies.


Also on this day, Kyle Rote Jr. is born in Dallas. The son of Southern Methodist University (SMU) running back Kyle Rote, soon to become a pro star with the Giants, Kyle Jr. played the original football. He starred for the Dallas Tornadoes, becoming one of the earliest American-born soccer players to be widely known. Indeed, he was the 1st American-born, and the 1st American-trained, player to lead the North American Soccer League in scoring for a season, in 1973.


However, he only played 5 games for the national team. He also won ABC's Superstars competition 3 times in 4 years in the late 1970s. He now runs an athletes' agent service.


December 25, 1951: Arsenal host Portsmouth, and win 4-1 on goals by Lewis, Logie, Freddie Cox and Peter Goring.

December 25, 1952: Arsenal beat Bolton Wanderers 6-4 at Burnden Park. The goals are scored by Logie, Roper, Ray Daniel, Arthur Milton, and 2 by Cliff Holton. Milton, who lived until 2007, was the last survivor of the 12 men to have played for England at the senior level in both soccer and cricket. The Compton Brothers had also done so. Arsenal would win the 1953 League title, the closest race in the League's history.

December 25, 1953: Patrick "Patsy" Donovan dies at age 88. The native of Queenstown, County Cork, Ireland was one of the top baseball players of his time, the 1890s and 1910s. A right fielder, he batted .307 for his career, collecting 2,253 hits, playing mainly for the Pittsburgh Pirates and St. Louis Cardinals.  He led the National League in stolen bases in 1900.

He also managed both teams, as well as the Brooklyn Dodgers and Boston Red Sox. But the only Pennant he was involved in was in his rookie year, with the Dodgers (or, as they were then known -- I swear, I am not making this up, it came from several of their players having gotten married in a single off-season -- the Bridegrooms) in 1890.



December 25, 1954: Arsenal host Chelsea at Highbury, and win 1-0 on a goal by 1940 Merseyside hero Tommy Lawton, now playing out the string at age 36.

But Chelsea will go on to win the League title for the 1st time in their 50-year history -- the only time they will do so until 2005, when corrupt Russian energy boss Roman Abramovich has taken them over. They win this 1955 title with the 1st man ever to win the League as both a non-managing player and a non-playing manager. And he's an Arsenal man: Ted Drake.


December 25, 1956: Arsenal play Chelsea to a 1-1 draw at Stamford Bridge. Whittaker had died earlier in the year, and the club had gone into a long decline that wouldn't be reversed for 10 years.

This remains the last game that Arsenal have played on a Christmas Day. By the 1970s, England's Football Association would stop allowing Football League games to be played on Christmas Day. To this day, however, they are still played on the day after, a.k.a. Boxing Day, usually neighboring rivals to save on travel costs.

December 25, 1957: 
Christopher Kamara (no middle name) is born in Middlesbrough, North Yorkshire, England. A midfielder, Chris Kamara helped Wiltshire team Swindon Town win England's 4th division in 1986, and get them promoted from the 3rd to the 2nd division the next year.

In 1990, he went back to Yorkshire, and helped Leeds United win the 2nd division and get promoted to the 1st. However, they sold him to Bedfordshire team Luton Town in 1991-92, and when Leeds won the League that year, Kamara didn't get a winner's medal.

He managed Yorkshire team Bradford City, and got them promoted from the 3rd to the 2nd division in 1996. He has since gone into the broadcasting side of soccer.

December 25, 1958: Rickey Nelson Henley is born in Chicago. His mother, who had named him after singer Eric Hilliard "Ricky" Nelson, remarried and took him to her husband's hometown of Oakland, California, and the boy was renamed Rickey Henley Henderson. A Baseball Hall-of-Famer and by far the all-time leader in stolen bases, Rickey is a legend. Just ask him.

Also on this day, Hanford Dixon (no middle name) is born in Mobile, Alabama. The All-Pro cornerback for the Cleveland Browns would bark like a dog at his teammates to get them psyched up, and fans in the bleachers at Cleveland Municipal Stadium would start barking along with him. Soon, he started calling that section the Dawg Pound, and they would respond by wearing dog masks and throwing dog biscuits.

December 25, 1959, 60 years ago: Robert Washington Jones is born in Demopolis, Alabama. A linebacker, Robbie Jones was a member of the University of Alabama team that won the 1979 National Championship, and was special teams captain of the Giants when they won Super Bowl XXI. 

December 25, 1964: Gary McAllister (no middle name) is born in Motherwell, Scotland. A midfielder, he helped hometown soccer club Motherwell gain promotion to Scotland's 1st division in 1985, was bought by English club Leicester City, helped Leeds United win England's Football League in 1992, played for Coventry City, and then was a member of the 2001 Liverpool team that won a "cup treble": The FA Cup, the League Cup and the UEFA Cup (the tournament now known as the UEFA Europa League).

He later managed Coventry, Leeds and Birmingham club Aston Villa, and is now a club ambassador for Liverpool.


December 25, 1966: Wendy Gebauer is born in Washington, D.C., and grows up in the nearby suburb of Reston, Virginia. A forward in the University of North Carolina's women's soccer dynasty, she was a member of the U.S. team that won the 1st-ever Women's World Cup in 1991.

December 25, 1968: James Thomas Dowd is born in Point Pleasant, New Jersey. Growing up in neighboring Brick, Jim Dowd was the 1st New Jerseyan to play for the Devils, and remains the only New Jerseyan to have his name on the Stanley Cup, having scored a late winner in Game 2 of the 1995 Finals against the Detroit Red Wings. He now coaches a youth hockey team in Red Bank, New Jersey.

Also, Corey Edward Widmer is born outside Washington in Alexandria, Virginia. A linebacker, he played for the Giants from 1992 to 1999.


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December 25, 1971: The longest game in NFL history is played. The Miami Dolphins beat the Kansas City Chiefs, 24-21, when Garo Yepremian kicks a field goal with 7 minutes and 20 seconds to go in the 2nd overtime of an AFC Divisional Playoff. It was also the Chiefs' last game at Kansas City Municipal Stadium, before moving to Arrowhead Stadium in September 1972.

Also on this day, Terry Vaughn (no middle name) is born in Sumter, South Carolina. A star receiver at the University of Arizona, he was not drafted by an NFL team, but became the 1st receiver in the Canadian Football League to catch 1,000 passes in a career.

He won the CFL Championship, the Grey Cup, with both Alberta teams, the 1998 Calgary Stampeders and the 2003 Edmonton Eskimos. He was named to the Canadian Football Hall of Fame and TSN's (The Sports Network, Canada's version of ESPN) 50 Greatest CFL Players.

December 25, 1973: Bullet Joe Simpson dies at age 80 in the Miami suburb of Coral Gables, Florida. A defenseman, he starred for the Edmonton Eskimos of the West Coast Hockey League, winning that league's title in 1922, and advancing to the Stanley Cup Finals, where they lost to the team now known as the Toronto Maple Leafs. He later starred for the NewYork Americans, and is in the Hockey Hall of Fame.

Also on this day, Robert James Elliott is born in Newcastle-upon-Tyne, in the North-East of England. A left back, Robbie Elliott starred for his hometown team, Newcastle United, and also played the 2006-07 season for their arch-rivals, Sunderland. Since 2009, he has worked with the United States Under-20 national team.

December 25, 1975: Two very different Boston legends are born. Hideki Okajima is a Japanese-born pitcher for the Red Sox, who helped them win the 2007 World Series.

And Rob Mariano is born in Canton, Massachusetts. "Boston Rob" continually wore a Red Sox cap while appearing on the CBS series Survivor, and ended up marrying his season's winner, Amber Brkich. Together, they went on to compete on another CBS series, The Amazing Race. They now live in Pensacola, Florida, and have 3 children, all girls.


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December 25, 1981: Willy Taveras -- apparently, his entire full name -- is born in Tenares, Dominican Republic. A center fielder, he reached the postseason with the 2004 and '05 Houston Astros, and the 2007 Colorado Rockies, playing in the 2005 and '07 World Series. In 2008, with the Rockies, he led the National League in stolen bases.

But he was one of these players who simply didn't get on base often enough to make his speed a useful weapon. Although he has kept his career going by playing in the Mexican and Dominican leagues, but hasn't appeared in Major League Baseball since 2010, with the Washington Nationals.

December 25, 1982: The 1st Aloha Bowl is played at Aloha Stadium in Honolulu, Hawaii. The University of Washington, then ranked Number 9 in the nation, defeats the University of Maryland, then Number 16, 21-20.

Honolulu had previously hosted the Poi Bowl from 1936 to 1939, and the Pineapple Bowl from 1940 to 1952, but those games were held on New Year's Day. The Aloha Bowl would be held on Christmas Day, and would feature a man in a Santa Claus suit parachuting onto the field to present the referee with the game ball. In 1991, the ABC sitcom Coach would feature a 2-part episode about the show's fictional Minnesota State University playing in the Pineapple Bowl on Christmas Day.

In 1998, 1999 and 2000, Aloha Stadium hosted a doubleheader, with the Aloha Bowl preceded by the Oahu Bowl. But that game quickly folded. The last Aloha Bowl was played in 2000. It was a commercial failure: Of the 19 games played, only the 1989 edition was a sellout of the 50,000-seat Aloha Stadium.

Having quickly gone from hosting 2 bowl games in 2000 to none in 2001, Hawaii tried again. The Hawaii Bowl was established in 2002, and was played on Christmas Day that year and the next, but has usually been played on Christmas Eve since. This year, it will be played on Christmas Eve, between Brigham Young University and an opponent to be determined.

Also on this day, Shawn Cornelius Andrews is born in Camden, Arkansas. A guard, he starred at the University of Arkansas, made 2 Pro Bowls with the Philadelphia Eagles, and played in Super Bowl XXXIX. He is a member of the Arkansas Sports Hall of Fame and the Eagles' 75th Anniversary Team. He played with the Giants in 2010, but a back injury soon ended his career.

His brother Stacy Andrews was an Eagle teammate in 2009, and closed his career helping the Giants win Super Bowl XLVI.

December 25, 1984: Jack Balmer dies in Liverpool at age 68. A forward, he helped Liverpool F.C. win the Football League title in 1947.

Also on this day, Alastair Nathan Cook is born in Gloucester, England. I don't know what makes a cricket player great, but Cook holds the records for most caps (appearances) and most caps as Captain for the England national team. He was named International Cricket Council Player of the Year in 2011. He is 5th on the all-time list for most runs in Test cricket, with 12,472. (Sachin Tendulkar of India holds the record, with 15,921.)

He currently plays for Essex County Cricket. That's Essex County in England, not in New Jersey. England does have a city named Newark, but, unlike in New Jersey, it isn't in the County of Essex, but in the County of Nottinghamshire. However, he retired from international cricket before the 2019 Cricket World Cup, and was not a member of the England team that won it.

Also on this day, Limas Lee Sweed Jr. is born outside Houston in Brenham, Texas. A receiver, he was with the University of Texas when it won the 2005 National Championship, and the Pittsburgh Steelers when they won Super Bowl XLIII. He last played in 2012, with the CFL's Saskatchewan Roughriders.

December 25, 1987: Demaryius Antwon Thomas is born in Montrose, Georgia. A receiver, he was with the Denver Broncos when they won Super Bowl 50. Now with the Jets, the 5-time Pro Bowler has caught 722 passes for 9,735 yards and 62 touchdowns.

December 25, 1988: Eric Ambrose Gordon Jr. is born in Indianapolis. Named Indiana's "Mr. Basketball" in 2007, the guard played just 1 season at Indiana University before declared for the NBA Draft. It took a while to become a big pro player, including 3 years with the Los Angeles Clippers and 5 years with the New Orleans Pelicans, but in 2017, with the Houston Rockets, he was named NBA Sixth Man of the Year.

December 25, 1989, 30 years ago: Yankee legend manager Billy Martin is killed in a drunken-driving crash near his home in Johnson City, New York, outside Binghamton. He was 61.

Also on this day, Walter Ris dies in Mission Viejo, California, just short of his 66th birthday. A swimmer, the Chicago native won 2 Gold Medals for the U.S. at the 1948 Olympics in London. He is a member of the International Swimming Hall of Fame.

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December 25, 1990: 
Garrett Nicholas Cooper is born in Auburn, Alabama, where his father was teaching at Auburn University. His father later got a teaching job in Los Angeles, and that's where Garrett grew up, although he returned to Auburn to play baseball. He made his major league debut in 2017, as a 1st baseman for the Yankees, but has since been traded to the Miami Marlins.

December 25, 1991: Frank Finnigan dies of a heart attack in his hometown of Shawville, Quebec, a suburb of Canada's national capital, Ottawa, Ontario. He was 90 years old, and had lived long enough to see his efforts to get his former hockey team, the Ottawa Senators, restored to the NHL for the 1992 expansion, but not long enough to see them take the ice.

A right wing, he played the original Senators from 1923 to 1934, including being an integral part of their 1927 Stanley Cup win. Due to the Great Depression, the Senators did not play in the 1931-32 season, and the Toronto Maple Leafs were allowed to sign him, enabling him to win that season's Stanley Cup with the Leafs. He was the Senators' Captain upon their return. In the 1933-34 season, he played in the Ace Bailey Benefit Game in Toronto.

But after that season, they moved to St. Louis, already known for good support of a minor-league team. Finnigan scored the final goal in the history of the old Senators. The St. Louis Eagles were terrible in 1934-35 and folded, selling him back to the Leafs, for whom he played until 1937. He served in the Royal Canadian Air Force in World War II and managed hotels.

Finnigan was the last surviving Senator from the Stanley Cup winners of 1927 -- still the last Cup won by an Ottawa team -- and participated in the "Bring Back The Senators" campaign. On October 8, 1992, before their 1st regular-season home game, at the Ottawa Civic Centre, his Number 8 was raised to the rafters, and his son Frank Finnigan Jr. was invited to drop the ceremonial puck before the 1st home game.

His brother Eddie Finnigan also played in the NHL, including for the St. Louis Eagles after they were no longer the Senators, but was mostly a career minor-leaguer. His daughter Joan Finnigan was a noted Canadian writer, including writing a book about the Senators' re-establishment, and several books about the Ottawa Valley.

December 25, 1992: Arin Gilliland (no middle name) is born in Lexington, Kentucky. Now using her married name of Arin Wright, she plays left back for the Chicago Red Stars of the National Women's Soccer League (NWSL). She is currently expecting her 1st child, and will likely miss the 1st half of the 2020 season on maternity leave.

Also on this day, Tanner Scott Rainey is born outside New Orleans in Folsom, Louisiana. He debuted with the Cincinnati Reds in 2018, making 8 appearances for them. He was a member of the Washington Nationals this past season, making 52 regular-season appearances, and entering 4 games of the World Series, which the Nats won.

December 25, 1997: Bill Hewitt dies in Port Perry, Ontario at age 68. The grandson of sportswriter W.A. Hewitt and the son of sportscaster Foster Hewitt, he was a longtime TV voice of the Toronto Maple Leafs. As far as I know, the Hewitts are the only family with 3 generations in any sport's Hall of Fame.

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December 25, 2001: The film Ali premieres, starring Will Smith as Muhammad Ali, depicting his life from the 1st time he wins the Heavyweight Championship of the World, in 1964 against Sonny Liston in Miami Beach, to the 2nd time he wins it, in 1974 against George Foreman in Zaire, and all the magic and all the madness in between.

December 25, 2004: Eddie Spicer dies in Rhyl, Wales at age 82. In 1939, the centreback signed for his hometown soccer team, Liverpool F.C., at just 17 years old. But World War II was underway, and he served in Britain's Royal Marines. He didn't make his official debut for the Mersey Reds until January 30, 1946, at 23.

In the 1946-47 season, he made 10 appearances for the club, which won the Football League title, but that was 1 game short of qualifying for a winner's medal under the rules of the time. He played for Liverpool in the 1950 FA Cup Final, but they lost to Arsenal. He broke his leg late in the next season, missing the entire 1951-52 season, and retired a year later, just 31.

December 25, 2007: Jim Beauchamp dies of leukemia at age 68. An outfielder, he was named Most Valuable Player of the Texas League in 1963, but that success didn't carry over into the major leagues. He debuted with the St. Louis Cardinals in 1963, was part of the Houston Astros' youth movement in 1964 and '65, was with the Milwaukee Braves when they moved to Atlanta in 1966, was traded away by the Cincinnati Reds right before they started winning Pennants again, and finally saw the postseason with the Pennant-winning 1973 Mets.

He then managed in the minor leagues, and was promoted to bench coach by the Braves in 1991, a part of 5 World Series with them, winning in 1995. His hometown of Grove, Oklahoma named its baseball field for him while he as still alive and well enough to enjoy it. "Beauchamp" is French for "beautiful field."

December 25, 2009, 10 years ago: Sherlock Holmes premieres, Guy Ritchie's retelling of Arthur Conan Doyle's legend, with Robert Downey Jr. as a Holmes who is impossible to be around, and more of a man of action, but still brilliant. Jude Law plays Dr. John H. Watson, and Rachel McAdams plays Irene Adler.

The villain is played by Mark Strong, previously in the film version of Fever PitchNick Hornby's memoir about being a fan of Arsenal. There is an inside joke: Among the villain's business holdings is the Woolwich Arsenal, the place where the team was founded in 1886. The film depicts Tower Bridge still under construction. It opened in 1894. 

December 25, 2019: Dear Santa Claus: The Yankees finally look serious. So do Arsenal and Rutgers. For Christmas, I want better head coaches for the Devils and the Red Bulls. I'll leave tickets with the milk and cookies.
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