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Baseball Is More Popular Than Football

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It's Opening Day. Sort of. Major League Baseball and ESPN are trying a "Community Shield" type of thing, where they have last season's World Series opponents start the season off.

In this case, it's the Kansas City Royals and the Mets. Since it's the Mets, we can ignore it.

The Yankees start tomorrow, so that's the real Opening Day.

To hear the conventional wisdom tell it, baseball is in trouble. It has been less popular than football for decades, it hasn't been as popular as basketball for a generation, it's not as popular as NASCAR, and even soccer is catching up.

First of all, NASCAR is not a sport, so toss that nonsense out.

Second of all, no, soccer is not catching up to baseball.

Third of all, basketball is seriously overhyped.

But let's just concentrate on the old comparison: As the late, great George Carlin put it, baseball, the 19th Century pastoral game, vs. football, the 20th Century technological struggle.

And let's put aside the things that make football stupid, like Commissioner Roger Goodell, cheerleaders (this isn't college, let alone high school), $50,000 fines for wearing your uniform slightly different from everybody else, and the existence of the Dallas Cowboys. And let's also put aside the things that make football cruel, like brain damage, permanent damage to other body parts, and fixed games and even fixed seasons. (Suspending Tom Brady for 4 games for essentially cheating his way into a Super Bowl is like giving John Gotti 2 years in prison for using too much hairspray.)

Baseball is still more popular than football.

In the 2015 NFL season, the average per-game attendance was 68,274. In the 2015 MLB season, it was 30,477.

Sounds pretty clear, right? The NFL's average was more than double MLB's.

As Lee Corso would say, "Not so fast, my friend!" NFL teams play once a week. MLB teams play an average of 6 times a week. So multiply that 30,477 times 6, and you get 182,863 people, on the average, paying to see a Major League Baseball game every week -- about 3 times (okay, 2.67 times) what the NFL gets.

What's that, you say? That's not a fair comparison? The NFL can't play more than once a week? Of course it can. All a team has to do is sign enough players. There are 128 colleges playing NCAA Division I Football Bowl Subdivision teams. (What used to be known as Division I-A.) They've got over 100 players on a team. That's between 12,000 and 13,000 men playing college football's equivalent of "the major leagues." Are you telling me that, out of those 13,000 men, only 1,696 (32 teams times 53 men on a roster) will ever be good enough to play in the NFL? Expand the rosters, schedule the games, and play 6 NFL games a week. Certainly, the men in question could use the money. And most NFL owners are rich as hell, and can afford it.

What's that, you say? That's not fair, either? Football is played on the weekend, so that people can go to the games? Balderdash. You've got Monday Night Football and Thursday Night Football. Besides, baseball maintains its 30,477 despite playing every weekday. (Not every time plays every day, but, aside from the All-Star Break, from early April to late September, there's usually a full slate, and at least a half-slate, of MLB games every day.) If the NFL is more popular than baseball, then, sure, you can find enough players to play 6 NFL-quality games every week, and get an average of more than 30,477 fans per game, and maintain that over 6 months.

What's that, you say? That's not fair, either? There's weather to think of? It's too hot to play football in July and August? It's too cold to play football in February? Well, it's too hot to play football in September, too. And it's too cold to play football in December and January. But you do it. It's too cold to play baseball in April, but we still do it, and fans still come to the games.

What's that, you say? The NFL has better TV ratings? That's because people bet on football. Take out the bettors, and you lose half your audience.

Face it: Baseball is more popular than football.

Why? Simple: Baseball is better than football.

How to "Bring Baseball Back"

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So if baseball, as I proved in my last post, is more popular than football, why do so many people say baseball is in trouble?

Because these people are stupid. They prefer football, which appeals to the lowest common denominator. As opposed to baseball, which appeals to thought.

Think of it this way: The Yankees, the Mets (yes, the Mets), the Boston Red Sox, the Chicago Cubs, the St. Louis Cardinals, the Los Angeles Dodgers and the San Francisco Giants have all shown great appeal to literary people, who have written great prose about them.

Which NFL teams have done the same thing? Name one.

You can't.

There are, however, people who prefer baseball to football, but still believe that baseball is in trouble, and needs to be "brought back."

Back to what? A time when it was more popular? It's never been more popular. A time when it was more popular than the NFL? As I showed, it still is. A time when its primacy was unquestioned? That's not necessary.

A time when "it was still a game, not a business"? Men have been charging admission for baseball games since 1862. At that point, 7 years before the Cincinnati Red Stockings were publicly admitting that they were playing their players, it is likely that some men were already being secretly paid to play baseball.

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But, to humor people who think we need to "bring baseball back," here's how you do it:

1. Get it off Fox, and put it on a real network, one that cares more about the game than about promoting its own shows, including putting its show stars on camera in seats next to the dugout and letting American Idol singers sing the National Anthem.

Corollary to the preceding: Never, ever let Joe Buck broadcast another baseball game. I don't care that his father was the great Cardinal announcer Jack Buck. You don't see the children of Mel Allen, Red Barber, Jack Brickhouse, Ernie Harwell, Phil Rizzuto or Bob Murphy broadcasting baseball games, do you?

Actually, there have been a lot of father-son sportscasting duos, including a few in baseball. Sometimes, it works, as with Thom Brennaman and Todd Kalas. Sometimes, it doesn't, as with Joe Buck and Skip Caray.

2. Advertise it as "the family sport." Show fathers, sons and grandsons -- and mothers, daughters and granddaughters. Show the people the connections that they're aware of -- and the ones they may not have noticed.

3. Show the first ball ceremonies, and have interviews with the teams' legends, so people see that your team connects to your father's and your grandfather's generations.

4. Advertise it as "the sport where you're not likely to have your favorite player suffer post-concussion syndrome," and "the sport where you're not likely to have your favorite player beat up his wife and children." Yes, take potshots at the NFL. Which will never happen as long as Fox holds the MLB TV rights, because the NFL is the cash cow that makes it possible for Fox to spew their political garbage.

5. Advertise it as "the sport where anyone can win." The idea that the lack of a salary cap prevents small-market teams from winning has been blown to pieces.

Just since the dawn of the 21st Century, we have seen Pennant winners, and thus World Series participants, from Phoenix, St. Louis, Houston, Detroit, Denver, Tampa Bay and Kansas City. Pittsburgh has now made the Playoffs 3 seasons in a row.

As for the 4 markets with 2 teams: Yes, the Mets won the National League Pennant last year; but the Yankees and the Mets have won just 1 Pennant each since 2003. The San Francisco Giants have won 3 of the last 6 World Series, but the Oakland Athletics haven't won a Pennant since 1990. The Los Angeles Dodgers won the NL Western Division last year, and the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim usually make the American League Playoffs, but, between them, they've won just 1 Pennant since 1988. And Chicago? The White Sox have won 1 Pennant since 1959 and 2 since 1919, and the Cubs no Pennants since 1945.

Baseball is a game that needs its big markets to survive, but doesn't need its big markets to be successful to survive. The smaller markets can do well, and have done well recently.

6. Show how some teams have national followings: The Yankees, the Red Sox, the Cubs, the Cardinals, the Dodgers, the Atlanta Braves. But don't actively favor any of them, the way Fox currently does with the Red Sox and used to do with the Yankees, or the NFL's networks do with New England and Dallas.

7. Have more frequent steroid tests, and reveal the results. So that we know who's dirty, but also that the vast majority of players are clean.

Corollary to the preceding? Punish the cheaters severely, and promote the ones who are clean. The reason Barry Bonds took steroids is because he was jealous of the attention that Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa were getting. If they'd been outed as steroid users before either of them got to 60 home runs in a season, they would have been abandoned by the fans, and Bonds would have been able to put himself forward as a clean star, and he would have not only gotten, but earned, the adulation he craved.

8. Discourage violence. Brushbacks should be allowed: A pitcher has the right to "control the plate." And accidents can happen: Batters are going to get hit with pitches, even when the pitcher doesn't want to do that. A pitcher shouldn't be punished for an accident.

But if a pitcher has a known history of hitting batters, and he clearly doesn't have control issues, put the hammer down. If the plate umpire thinks a pitch was on purpose, he has to throw the pitcher out of the game. And then he has to warn both managers that it ends now, or else there's going to be more ejections -- and suspensions. This will show both sides that he means business, and it will also cut down on batters charging the mound after they get hit.

Which brings us to the MLB office. It needs to suspend the offending pitcher for 5 games, so that he misses 1 start. If he does it again, a month: 6 starts. A 3rd time, a season. A 4th time, for life. And also punish players who charge the mound.

Collisions at home plate? As long as the purpose is clearly to prevent the catcher from making the play, and not to injure him, leave it alone. Likewise, if a slide is meant to break up a double play, it shouldn't be punished, unless the runner goes out of the baseline to do it, in which case the batter running to 1st base should also be called out.

On the other hand (and, remember, I hate the Mets, so this has nothing to do with protecting one of their players), Chase Utley's slide into Ruben Tejada was dirty, and Utley should have been suspended for the rest of the postseason.

9. Tell the players and managers to get on with it. Stoppages of play for injuries are necessary. I'm not talking about those.

But if umpires really believe that games are taking too long, they have the authority to tell pitchers, catchers and managers to cut the mound conferences short, and to tell batters to quit fidgeting like Mike Hargrove and Carlton Fisk, and get your behind back in the batter's box!

Sidebar: Funny how NFL fans complain that "Baseball is boring" because games take 3 1/2 hours now, but they don't complain about how NFL games now last just as long. Here's what's boring: Touchdown, 5 instant replays, extra point, 2 more instant replays of the touchdown, a break that includes 4 commercials (at least 1 of which will be an incredibly stupid one for a beer or a car, and another one of which will be a trailer for an incredibly stupid movie), another instant replay of the touchdowns, the ensuing kickoff, the return, and another commercial break.

In other words, you can have 10 minutes between the touchdown and the next play from scrimmage, with nothing but the extra point, the kickoff, instant replays and commercials. And NFL fans say MLB takes too long, and has too much down time between plays? Physicians, heal thyselves.

Also designed to reduce the time of the game, but also because it's idiocy and should be stopped:

10. Stop bringing in a pitcher to pitch to only 1 batter. The MLB office and the umpires can't do anything about this, only the managers can. But you're bringing in a pitcher to pitch only to the next batter, because they're both lefthanded? This is so stupid: If a pitcher can't get batters out simply because they bat with the other hand, then you shouldn't have him on your major league roster at all. I'd call this The Boone Logan Rule.

11. Bring back the Saturday Game of the Week and Monday Night Baseball, and air a revival of This Week In Baseball, showing it 5 times a week, the way NBC Sports Network does their soccer show Men In Blazers.

In fact, have a Men In Blazers-type show for baseball (but not with Englishmen, obviously). Have three guys: One from the Northeast (but not a Yankee or Red Sox fan), one from the Midwest (but not a Cub or Cardinal fan), and one from the West Coast (but not a Dodger fan), and have them discuss the sport the way real fans who don't have show-hosting jobs do.

12. Doubleheaders. Every team should have 1 per month. This will cut down on MLB teams' revenue at first. But the goodwill it will generate will cause more people to want to come to games, and they'll get it back: 77 paid admissions, but 81 games' worth of revenue.

The preceding will also allow this:

13. Shorten the season. Right now, it takes 26 weeks to play 162 games. Throw in these doubleheaders, and it will take 25.

Finally:

14. Realignment. Expand to 32 teams, scrap the Leagues entirely (you've already got common baseballs and common umpiring crews, as you didn't have before 2000), and do it geographically like the NBA, the NHL, and (sort of) the NFL does it, with 8 teams in each Division:

Atlantic Division: Baltimore Orioles, Boston Red Sox, a team in Charlotte (which has always done well in attendance in the minor leagues), a restored Montreal Expos, New York Mets, New York Yankees, Philadelphia Phillies, Washington Nationals. 

Midwestern Division: Chicago Cubs, Chicago White Sox, Cincinnati Reds, Cleveland Indians, Detroit Tigers, Milwaukee Brewers, Pittsburgh Pirates, Toronto Blue Jays. 

Central Division: Atlanta Braves, Houston Astros, Kansas City Royals, Miami Marlins, Minnesota Twins, St. Louis Cardinals, Tampa Bay Rays, Texas Rangers.

Pacific Division: Arizona Diamondbacks, Colorado Rockies, Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, Los Angeles Dodgers, Oakland Athletics, San Diego Padres, San Francisco Giants, Seattle Mariners.

10 games (5 home, 5 away, a 3-game and a 2-game roadtrip every season) against teams in your own Division. That's 70. 4 games (2 home, 2 away, a pair of 2-game roadtrips or a single 4-game roadtrip every season) against teams in the other Divisions. That's 96. That's 166 games -- only 4 more than we have now, and certainly enough to make up for the single-admission doubleheaders.

Then, as from 1969 to 1993, have only the Division winners advance to the MLB Semifinals, seeding them by regular-season wins, and the winners of those will play each other in the World Series.

If this setup were in place this season, we could begin today, April 3, and end on Sunday, September 25. A best-4-out-of-7 Semifinal would be over by October 6, the World Series could begin on Saturday, October 8, and end with Game 7 no later than Sunday, October 16 (barring rainouts). This would put it in line with the dates the season tended to end between 1960 and 1984, and it would also reduce (but certainly not eliminate) the possibility of a Playoff or World Series game being cold.

"Wait, Uncle Mike," you say, "if we eliminate the Leagues, what do we do about the designated hitter? The AL uses the DH, the NL doesn't." The DH becomes universal. If the NL owners don't like it, they can sell their teams to people who accept that any DH can field any position better than 99 percent of pitchers can hit.

Does anybody else have any suggestions? Feel free to tell me in the Comments.

Top 10 Best Days In Yankee History

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Opening Day is always a good day, at least until the game begins. But what are the best days in Yankee history?

I've done this before, and it doesn't really need an update. I just felt like doing it again. These will be in chronological order, and will not necessarily involve actual games.

Top 10 Best Days In Yankee History

1. January 9, 1903. This was the day American League founder and President Byron Bancroft "Ban" Johnson approved the move of the AL's Baltimore Orioles to New York, where they would take on the name "Highlanders" until officially being renamed the "Yankees" in 1913, though the name had been around nearly from the start. So this day is as close to an official "birthday" as the Yankees have. Naturally, it is a great day, as the founding day is for each of the 30 MLB teams.

For the record, on the New York Tri-State Area's other teams:

* It's not clear when in 1925 the National Football League franchise for the New York Giants was granted, but they played their 1st game on October 4, 1925.

* The New York Rangers were granted National Hockey League membership on April 30, 1926

* The New York Knickerbockers, or Knicks for short, were granted Basketball Association of America membership on June 6, 1946. The league merged with the National Basketball League and became the National Basketball Association in 1949.

* The New York Titans were granted American Football League membership on August 14, 1959. They became the New York Jets in 1963.

* The New York Mets were granted National League membership on March 6, 1961.

* The New Jersey Americans were granted American Basketball Association membership on February 2, 1967. They became the New York Nets in 1968, the New Jersey Nets in 1977, and the Brooklyn Nets in 2012.

* The New York Islanders were granted National Hockey League membership on November 8, 1971.

* The Colorado Rockies franchise was transferred from Denver to New Jersey on May 27, 1982, and renamed the New Jersey Devils on June 30, 1982.

2. January 11, 1915. The Yankees' first owners, Frank Farrell and Big Bill Devery are sick of losing, sick of the baseball business, and sick of each other. So they sell the team to Jacob Ruppert and Tillinghast L'Hommedieu Huston.

Ruppert, son of a German immigrant, was a brewer (the Ruppert Houses project now stands on the site of the Ruppert Brewery at 92nd Street & 2nd Avenue on the Upper East Side), and had served 2 terms as a Democratic Congressman from New York. Due to his political connections, he had been named an honorary colonel in the New York National Guard.

Huston was an engineer, who had made his name and fortune helping the U.S. Army out during the Spanish-American War in 1898, rising to the rank of Captain. So Ruppert was nicknamed "Colonel" (you didn't dare call him "Jake"), and Huston was nicknamed "Cap" (which he still answered to even after he went off to World War I and was promoted to an actual Colonel, though he also answered to "Til").

Ruppert was a lot like George Steinbrenner, beyond his role and his German ancestry: He was not willing to pay for mediocrity, but he was willing to spend to build a champion. He and Huston did so, although by the time the Yankees won their 1st World Series in 1923, they, like the men from whom they purchased the franchise, had had enough of each other (Huston never liked Miller Huggins, Ruppert's choice for manager), and Ruppert bought out Huston's half-share.

Huston has been virtually forgotten: While Ruppert's heirs dedicated a plaque in his memory that graced the outfield wall of the pre-renovation Yankee Stadium from 1940 to 1973, and hung on the wall in the old Stadium's Monument Park from 1976 to 2008 and is now in the new Stadium's Monument Park, and the street connecting 157th and 161st Streets on the third-base side of the old Stadium was named Ruppert Place, there is no memorial to Huston at the Stadium.

When Ruppert died in 1939, he was still the sole owner of the Yankees, and had been around the team nearly every day until his final illness, so there were big headlines; when Huston died the year before, no current member of the team had even met him.

Nevertheless, when "the Colonels" bought the Yankees, they set an ambitious course that intended championships -- if not a gigantic new stadium -- from the start. In 1915, the Yankees were New York's 3rd-most-popular team, and it wasn't even close. By 1923, and the Yanks' defeat of the Giants in the World Series after losing the last 2 to them, they were not only the most popular team in New York, but, thanks to someone I'm about to mention, they were the most popular sports team in the world.

3. December 26, 1919. Let's clear some things up right now. Harry Frazee, owner of the Boston Red Sox from 1916 to 1923, is not to blame for selling George Herman "Babe" Ruth to the Yankees. Ruth himself is.

Ruth, about to turn 25 years old, was still very much a juvenile delinquent -- perhaps not a malicious sort, but he was, in the word he had hated since he was sent off to a combination orphanage/reform school in Baltimore at age 7, "incorrigible." He had openly defied his manager and his team owner, was making unreasonable demands, and was one of the champion carousers of that era. He made today's star athletes and music stars look like rank amateurs.

Frazee had no choice: He had to get rid of the Babe, just to restore order at Fenway Park. And with a dispute cutting the AL in half, there were only 2 teams willing to make deals with him: The Yankees and the Chicago White Sox. And the White Sox were owned by Charlie Comiskey. There are 2 things everyone not a White Sox fan remembers about Comiskey today: He was cheap, and that caused the Black Sox Scandal that was then about to break. Comiskey was willing to make a deal with Frazee, but he wasn't willing to pay what he considered an exorbitant sum for Ruth.

Ruppert and Huston were. So they bought Ruth's contract for $125,000, by far the biggest sum ever spent on a player transfer in North American sports. (I seriously doubt that any soccer club -- in Europe, South America or anywhere else -- had yet reached their national currency's equivalent of that figure on a player transfer.) The deal was announced a few days later, on January 5, 1920. The rest is history.

Well, history and myth. Let me make a point that others have made: Frazee was hurting, all right, but it was because Ruth was giving him headaches and ulcers. He was not hurting for cash. He didn't need the money to finance a new Broadway play: The plays he was producing, mostly musical comedies, were doing well. And the play most often cited as the reason for the Ruth sale, No, No, Nanette, didn't debut until 1925.

Say what you want about Harry Harrison Frazee, but he didn't sell Ruth because he was greedy, and he didn't sell Ruth so he could sacrifice the Red Sox on the altar of Broadway.

Funny thing: When the Yankees played the Red Sox in Game 7 of the 2003 ALCS, I couldn't get in, so I went from bar to bar in Manhattan looking for a good place to watch it, until finally deciding I had to go up to The Stadium to be there for the result, whatever it turned out to be. But because it was now after midnight, the trains were on a different schedule. So I got off at 50th Street, and soon found myself at 220 West 48th Street, outside the Longacre Theatre, which had once been owned by... Harry Frazee. Once I realized the significance of where I was and what it represented (where Frazee staged the plays that he supposedly needed to sell Ruth to finance), I heard a tremendous sound on my Walkman: Aaron Boone hitting the Pennant-winning home run, giving the supposed Curse of the Bambino one last extension. Tell me God isn't a Yankee Fan!

One more thing: In the picture above, Ruth signs his contract with his right hand. But he did everything else lefthanded: Bat, throw a baseball, bowl, even swing a golf club. Most baseball players who bat lefty and like golf still swing a club righthanded. This may be because it's still difficult to get good lefty clubs.

4. April 18, 1923. Opening Day of the original Yankee Stadium. The biggest ballpark yet built, and although it wouldn't stay that way (Cleveland Municipal Stadium would seat more), The Stadium, as much as anything else, became part of the Yankees' identity and mystique. Ruth hit the park's first home run, and the Yankees beat (who else?) the Red Sox, 4-1.

5. November 21, 1934. The Yankees purchase the contract of an outfielder, who had just turned 21 years old, from the San Francisco Seals of the Pacific Coast League. No other big-league team seemed to want him. Why not? Knee injury. The Yankees took a chance, giving the Seals $25,000, 5 players, and the right to hang onto the kid for the 1935 season before sending him east for 1936. His name? Joseph Paul DiMaggio.

Ruth had played his last game for the Yankees, although the general public didn't know that yet. Gehrig was just 31 and still at his peak -- in fact, he'd just won the Triple Crown. But with DiMaggio, the Yankees had secured their future, all the way through the 1940s and into the early 1950s. This made what we now think of as "The Yankee Mystique" possible -- including the scoutings and signings of the cornerstones of their 1950s dynasty: Mickey Mantle, Yogi Berra and Whitey Ford. They no longer needed Ruth to promote themselves.

Purchasing DiMaggio turned the Yankees from a team that had a great generation into a team for all generations. In essence, they went from being what the New York Islanders became from 1975 to 1987 to being... the New York Yankees.

Neat little footnote: DiMaggio's 1st pro game was for the Seals on October 1, 1932 -- the very day Ruth called his shot against the Chicago Cubs in the World Series.

6. October 12, 1948. The Yankees take the next step in their future-securing by hiring Charles Dillon "Casey" Stengel as manager. He'd gotten a reputation, both as a player and as a manager, for being a "clown." For this reason, many Yankee players, fans and sportswriters were against the hiring.

As Jim Ogle, the Newark Star-Ledger reporter who later ran the Yankee Alumni Association (making him responsible for putting together Old-Timers' Day), put it, "Well, the clown did pretty well. He won 10 Pennants in 12 years, and made the Yankee legend and mystique grow volumes." As Casey himself would have put it, "And you could look it up."

7. April 14, 1955. Aside from the opening of the original Yankee Stadium, this the only date on this list to involve an actual game. And it was a loss, to the Red Sox of all teams, 8-4 at Fenway Park. So had could this have been one of the best days in Yankee history?

Because Elston Howard played left field at the end of the game. The Yankees had finally put a black player on the field in a game that counted. It had been 8 years since Jackie Robinson had done the same for all of baseball.

It should be noted that the Red Sox were then managed by Michael "Pinky" Higgins, a Dallas native (and thus a Southerner) who allegedly said, "There'll be no (N-word)s on this ballclub as long as I have anything to say about it." In 1959, he was fired, and Pumpsie Green was promoted from the minors, making the Sox the last MLB team to integrate.

Oddly, no one blames Sox general manager (and former shortstop and field manager) Joe Cronin for the color bar at Fenway, yet 1959 was the year he was named AL President, thus leaving the Sox organization, and the year the Sox integrated. Coincidence? That's what the incurious believe in.

For the record, Higgins returned as manager a year later, and became general manager as well, holding the latter job until 1965. He did bring in some black players. Is it possible that he was misquoted? Is it possible that he had a change of heart? Is it possible that Sox owner Tom Yawkey told him that he had to bring in black players if he wanted to continue working in the organization?

Whatever the truth is, it is interesting that, for decades, no one dared blame Cronin, instead preferring to blame Higgins, whose firing as GM paved the way for Dick O'Connell as GM and Dick Williams as field manager to build the 1967 "Impossible Dream" Pennant winners.

8. January 3, 1973. George Steinbrenner and his group buy the Yankees from CBS. The era of Yankee management tolerating mediocrity was over. The Boss Years were about to begin.

When George bought the Yankees, the purchase price was $8.8 million. When he died in 2010, the team and all its assets were said to be worth $1.6 billion. With inflation factored in, that's about 37 times what he paid.

9. July 30, 1990. Commissioner Francis T. "Fay" Vincent permanently bans George Steinbrenner from the day-to-day management (although not the actual ownership, and financial responsibilities and receipt of income thereof) of the team. This was because George had hired Howie Spira, a private investigator and compulsive gambler, to find damaging information about Yankee star Dave Winfield and his charitable foundation, in order to discredit Winfield.

If Spira ever found anything, it has never been publicly revealed. For that reason, Dave, in the exact opposite of what George intended, was the only one of the three who came out looking good. Spira turned to Vincent, and George was banned. George was, however, permitted to apply for reinstatement after 2 years, and in 1993 reinstatement was granted.

The Yankees were already in last place at the time -- 1908, 1912, 1966 and 1990 remain the only last-place finishes in the team's history -- and I actually went to the game that night, against the Detroit Tigers. The Yankees won, 6-2. Only 24,037 attended, and what a relief there was in the crowd. I'm not ashamed to admit it: I took part in the "Steinbrenner sucks!" chant.

If you had told us that night that, as a result of the banning order, Gene Michael (whose initials, appropriately, are GM) would rebuild the organization, top to bottom, and within 6 years we'd be World Champions again, I think we would have taken it.

But if you had told us then that, 6 years later, we'd be chanting, "Thank you, George!" at the ticker-tape parade following said World Series win, we'd have wondered what you were smoking.

And yet, both came true: Both the Yankees and their Boss were rehabilitated, restored and redeemed. In order for both the team and Steinbrenner to be redeemed, George had to go. As Richie Ashburn would've said to his broadcast partner, "Hard to believe, Harry."

10. July 30, 2009. If you're a Red Sox fan, and you're intellectually honest, this was The Day the Music Died. This was the day it was revealed that both David Ortiz and Manny Ramirez flunked steroid tests in 2003 -- meaning the team's 2004 and 2007 World Championships were illegitimate. 

Maybe Manny was already a great hitter without steroids, but there's no way the Sox would've won either title with the David Ortiz who averaged 14 homers and 59 RBIs a year for the Minnesota Twins from 1997 to 2002. Big Papi was a big fat fraud.

To this day, Sox fans chant "Sterrrr-oids!" at the Yankees, especially Alex Rodriguez, who, to this day, has still never been caught as a Yankee, and whose 1st World Championship came 6 years -- not 1 year -- after he was caught. Since 1918, Yankees 27, Red Sox 0*. The Curse of the Bambino could not be broken without the Sox cheating. So if it ever actually existed, then... it still does.

And the collapse of October 17-20, 2004 counts for nothing. The Yankees didn't choke, the Sox fucking cheated.

And July 30, 2009 was the day that confirmed that we never deserved such ignominy. And the Sox did. In other words, the Curse of the Mitchell Report was dead.

And any Sox fan who says those 2004, 2007 and 2013 titles are real, whether I know you or not, you can kiss my ring. Take your pick: There's 27 of them. All real.

New Lineup For Yesterday

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My grandmother's favorite poet was Ogden Nash (1902-1971). He was known for quirky rhymes. In 1931, he wrote his most famous lines: "Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker." In 1968, addressing the rise of the hippies, he made it, "Candy is dandy, liquor is quicker, pot is not."

Nash was a big baseball fan. In the January 1949 issue of SPORT magazine, his poem "Lineup for Yesterday" was published. He honored 24 players, plus himself, and the game in general.
Of those 24, all but one either had been, or would be, elected to the Baseball Hall of Fame. The one who hasn't been, and never will be, was Louis "Bobo" Newsom, who pitched most of his career for the early American League's two legendary losers, the Washington Senators and the St. Louis Browns, although he did win a World Series with the Yankees in 1947. Nash, whose own surname started with N, needed one. Why not Hal Newhouser, I wonder?

Here's his original text:

(Grover Cleveland Alexander)
A is for Alex
The great Alexander;
More Goose eggs he pitched
Than a popular gander.

(Roger Bresnahan)
B is for Bresnahan
Back of the plate;
The Cubs were his love,
and McGraw his hate.

(Ty Cobb)
C is for Cobb
Who grew spikes and not corn,
And made all the basemen
Wish they weren't born.

(Jerome "Dizzy" Dean)
D is for Dean,
The grammatical Diz,
When they asked, Who's the tops?
Said correctly, I is.

(Johnny Evers)
E is for Evers,
His jaw in advance;
Never afraid
To Tinker with Chance.

(Frankie "Fordham Flash" Frisch)
F is for Fordham
And Frankie and Frisch;
I wish he were back
With the Giants, I wish.

(Lou Gehrig)
G is for Gehrig,
The Pride of the Stadium;
His record pure gold,
His courage, pure radium.

(Rogers Hornsby)
H is for Hornsby;
When pitching to Rog,
The pitcher would pitch,
Then the pitcher would dodge.

(Ogden Nash, the author)
I is for Me,
Not a hard-hitting man,
But an outstanding all-time
Incurable fan.

(Walter "the Big Train" Johnson)
J is for Johnson
The Big Train in his prime
Was so fast he could throw
Three strikes at a time.

(Willie Keeler)
K is for Keeler,
As fresh as green paint,
The fastest and mostest
To hit where they ain't.

(Napoleon "Nap" Lajoie)
L is for Lajoie
Whom Clevelanders love,
Napoleon himself,
With glue in his glove.

(Christy Mathewson)
M is for Matty,
Who carried a charm
In the form of an extra
brain in his arm.

(Bobo Newsom)
N is for Newsom,
Bobo's favorite kin.
You ask how he's here,
He talked himself in.

(Mel Ott)
O is for Ott
Of the restless right foot.
When he leaned on the pellet,
The pellet stayed put.

(Eddie Plank)
P is for Plank,
The arm of the A's;
When he tangled with Matty
Games lasted for days.

(Connie Mack)
Q is for Don Quixote
Cornelius Mack;
Neither Yankees nor years
Can halt his attack.

(Babe Ruth)
R is for Ruth.
To tell you the truth,
There's just no more to be said,
Just R is for Ruth.

(Tris Speaker)
S is for Speaker,
Swift center-field tender,
When the ball saw him coming,
It yelled, "I surrender."

(Bill Terry)
T is for Terry
The Giant from Memphis
Whose .400 average
You can't overemphis.

(Carl Hubbell)
U would be 'Ubell
if Carl were a cockney;
We say Hubbell and Baseball
Like Football and Rockne.

(Charles "Dazzy" Vance)
V is for Vance
The Dodgers' very own Dazzy;
None of his rivals
Could throw as fast as he.

(Honus Wagner)
W is for Wagner,
The bowlegged beauty;
Short was closed to all traffic
With Honus on duty.

(Jimmie Foxx)
X is the first
of two x's in Foxx
Who was right behind Ruth
with his powerful soxx.

(Cy Young)
Y is for Young
The magnificent Cy;
People battled against him,
But I never knew why.

Z is for Zenith
The summit of fame.
These men are up there.
These men are the game.

*

I've decided to update it, for my lifetime.

I originally had, "M is for Maddux. He wasn't no cheater, and proved you could win 300 without a heater." Then I realized I'd forgotten Mickey Mantle (who retired before I was born) and Willie Mays (who hung on until right before I turned 4).

I couldn't find a place for my favorite player of all time. But after hearing him endorse Donald Trump, I decided to remove another favorite, Paulie Pinstripes, for whom I'd written, "O is for O'Neill, who might throw his helmet, but could also take a pitch and then overwhelm it." Then I adjusted the focus slightly, and my man, Number 44, fits in.

A is for Aaron
called Hammerin' Hank
who rolled to the record
like an old army tank.

B is for Bench
of the Big Red Machine.
In my lifetime, the greatest
catcher on the scene.

C is for Clemens
the fiery Rocket.
Both plaudits and controversies
he could well stock it.

D is for Dawson
the Montreal Hawk
who also made fans
at Wrigley Field squawk.

E is for Eckersley.
Once he could start
until he superbly
played a fireman's part.

F is for Fingers
known for his mustache
but the pitching of Rollie
had lots of panache.

G is for Gooden
the fell-from-grace Doc
but on one night in Pinstripes
he turned back the clock.

H is for Henderson
the ego-rich Rickey.
Let him get on base
and things could get sticky.

I is for Ichiro
the slapping Suzuki
who has long since proven
he wasn't just fluky.

J is for Jeter
the glorious Captain.
Those 5 Yankee titles?
They didn't "just happen."

K is for Kaline
whose 3,000 hits
made Michigan baseball fans
love him to bits.

L is for Larkin
the Cincy shortstop.
His bat had some clout
and his arm had some hop.

M is for Mantle
and also for Mays
who started off millions
on the baseball craze.

N is for Niekro
who tossed from the knuckle
and for 24 seasons
not once did he buckle.

O is for October
the time of Reggie Jackson.
Those World Series balls he hit?
They ain't coming back, son.

P is for Pujols.
He may not be Stan
for a generation of Cardinal
fans, he's The Man.

Q is for Quisenberry
the sumbarining Quis.
The Royals' best pitcher?
That reliever still is.

R is for Rodriguez
the puzzling A-Rod.
What goes on in his head
is known only to God.

S is for Schmidt.
When he took a hack
it was a long drive, outta here
for Michael Jack.

T is for Thome
the powerful Jim
who crushed lots of homers
with vigor and vim.

U is for Utley
the young man named Chase
who won for the Phils
but Met fans call him disgrace.

V is for Vladimir
the hard-hitting Guerrero
whose hits are more common
than the Golden Sombrero.

W is for Winfield
a stunning athlete.
No baseball specimen
may have been more complete.

X is the last letter
in baseball's network.
I wonder how their announcers
managed to get work.

Y is for Yastrzemski.
When pitching to Carl
the pitcher would throw
and Yaz would make him snarl.

Z is for Zero.
I'm all out of names.
But you can't predict baseball
in any of its games.

Basketball Hall-of-Famers By Team -- 2016 Edition

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Congratulations to the newest members of the Basketball Hall of Fame: Shaquille O'Neal, Allen Iverson, Yao Ming, WNBA star Sheryl Swoopes, Michigan State coach Tom Izzo, and Chicago Bulls owner Jerry Reinsdorf (also co-owner of the White Sox, congrats even though I don't like him).

Congratulations also to the families of posthumous inductees: 1960s NBA and 1970s ABA great Zelmo Beaty, referee Darrell Garretson, longtime black-college coach John McClendon, and early black star Cumberland Posey.

"Cum" Posey, who played before not just integration but his nickname becoming R-rated, is the 1st man elected as a player to both the Baseball and the Basketball Hall of Fame.

*

For this list, I'm only including NBA players, coaches and executives, not guys who got in mostly on the basis of their college or pre-NBA pro tenure. I'm also relaxing the 4-season rule that I put in for baseball and pro football, because a lot of guys were with teams for less than that but were still vital contributors to an NBA title with a team.

I'm also amending my separate-cities rule to include all Nets -- "New York" (Long Island), "New Jersey" and "Brooklyn," ABA and NBA -- as the same franchise. And I'm not doing this because I still root for them. At the moment, I remain an NBA free agent, a fan without a team.

Ties broken by most players, then by fewest seasons in the league (more HOFers per year), then by most non-broadcasters.


First list: All HOFers.  Second list: Living HOFers.


1. New York Knicks, 22: Dick McGuire (player, coach & executive), Nat "Sweetwater" Clifton, Harry Gallatin, Richie Guerin, Tom Gola, Willis Reed (also coached for them), Dave DeBusschere (player & executive), Walt "Clyde" Frazier, Bill Bradley, Earl "the Pearl" Monroe, Jerry Lucas, Spencer Haywood, Bernard King, Patrick Ewing, Joe Lapchick (coach), Red Holzman (coach), Pat Riley (coach), Ned Irish (owner), Marty Glickman (broadcaster), Bob Wolff (broadcaster), Marv Albert (broadcaster), John Andariese (broadcaster).

Surprise: The Knicks have the most! Although they still trail the Celtics when you count only guys who were elected as players, 18-14.

Hubie Brown coached the Knicks, but was elected as a broadcaster, and not for the Knicks. Phil Jackson played for the Knicks, but was elected as a coach, and has never coached them. His maneuvers as team president haven't yet been Hall-worthy, either. Larry Brown only coached one season, possibly the worst of his career, partly the fault of general manager Isiah Thomas. Because he never played for the Knicks, and he was not elected as an executive, you can't count Isiah as a Knick HOFer -- and why would you want to?

2. Boston Celtics, 21: Bob Cousy, Bill Sharman, Ed Macauley, Frank Ramsey, Tommy Heinsohn (elected as player & a coach, was also a broadcaster), Bill Russell (player & coach), K.C. Jones (player & coach), Sam Jones, Tom "Satch" Sanders, John Havlicek, Bailey Howell, Dave Cowens, Jo Jo White, Larry Bird, Kevin McHale, Robert Parish, Nate "Tiny" Archibald, Dennis Johnson, Walter Brown (founder & owner), Red Auerbach (coach & executive), Johnny Most (broadcaster).


Hard to believe the Celtics don't have the most. That won't last, though: Due to having won the 2008 title, Kevin Garnett and Paul Pierce will probably be elected, and Rajon Rondo might be.

3. Los Angeles Lakers, 15: Elgin Baylor, Jerry West (player & executive), Gail Goodrich, Wilt Chamberlain, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Jamaal Wilkes, Earvin "Magic" Johnson, Bob McAdoo, James Worthy, Shaquille O'Neal, Bill Sharman (coach), Pat Riley (coach), Phil Jackson (coach), Jerry Buss (owner), Chick Hearn (broadcaster).


Kobe Bryant will join them, since his Colorado incident has been unofficially swept under the rug by the NBA establishment. Rod Hundley played for the Lakers, but was elected as a Utah Jazz broadcaster.

4. Philadelphia 76ers, 12: Wilt Chamberlain, Hal Greer, Chet Walker, Billy Cunningham (player & coach), Julius "Doctor J" Erving, Moses Malone, Charles Barkley, Allen Iverson, Alex Hannum (coach), Larry Brown (coach), Harvey Pollack (executive), Bill Campbell (broadcaster).

Doug Collins, who both played for the Sixers and was their head coach, has been elected as a broadcaster, but not for the Sixers, and thus can't be counted with them. Dolph Schayes was the team's 1st coach after it moved from being the Syracuse Nationals in 1963, but can't be counted as a Sixers' HOFer. Jack Ramsay is in the Hall as a coach, but for his performance elsewhere, and was largely responsible for the breakup of the 1965-68 Sixer team that really should have won more, and was turned from the best record the NBA had yet seen (68-13 in 1967) into still the worst it has ever seen (9-73 in 1973) in just 6 seasons.

5. Detroit Pistons, 12: Dave DeBusschere, Bailey Howell, Bob Lanier, Dave Bing, Isiah Thomas, Joe Dumars, Dennis Rodman, Chuck Daly (coach), Larry Brown (coach), Fred Zollner (owner), William Davidson (owner), Bob Wolff (broadcaster). If Grant Hill is ever elected, it will be for what he did at Duke, but he can be counted here.

6. Chicago Bulls, 10: Chet Walker, Artis Gilmore, Jerry Sloan, Michael Jordan, Scottie Pippen, Dennis Rodman, Phil Jackson (coach), Tex Winter (coach), Jerry Reinsdorf (owner), Jim Durham (broadcaster). 

Philadelphia Warriors, 9: Joe Fulks, Paul Arizin, Andy Phillip, Neil Johnston, Tom Gola, Wilt Chamberlain, Guy Rodgers, Eddie Gottlieb (founder & owner), Bill Campbell (broadcaster).


7. Houston Rockets, 8: Elvin Hayes, Calvin Murphy, Moses Malone, Ralph Sampson, Hakeem Olajuwon, Clyde Drexler, Dikembe Mutombo, Yao Ming. Oddly, former player and coach Rudy Tomjanovich has not yet been elected.

8. San Francisco/Golden State Warriors, 8: Guy Rodgers, Nate Thurmond, Rick Barry, Jamaal Wilkes, Robert Parish, Chris Mullin, Sarunas Marciulionis, Don Nelson (coach).


Since they've only moved within the San Francisco Bay Area since 1962 (San Francisco to Oakland in 1971, and plan to move back to San Francisco for the 2017-18 season), I'm counting them as a single team. Wilt Chamberlain wasn't with this version of the Warriors long enough to count, although I would count him if the Warriors had won, rather than lost, the 1964 NBA Finals. Bill King was the longtime radio voice of all 3 Oakland teams -- the Athletics, the Raiders and the Warriors -- but, for all the respect he earned, strangely, never received any of sport's Hall of Fame's award for broadcasters during his lifetime, and still hasn't since his death. As for Steph Curry, he certainly looks like he's headed for Hall qualification.

St. Louis Hawks, 8: Bob Pettit, Cliff Hagan, Alex Hannum (player-coach), Ed Macauley, Clyde Lovellette, Slater Martin, Lenny Wilkens, Zelmo Beaty.

Rochester Royals, 7: Al Cervi (player & coach), Arnie Risen, Bob Davies, Bobby Wanzer, Red Holzman, Maurice Stokes, Les Harrison (owner). Holzman was elected as a Knicks coach, but could have been elected as a player anyway, so I'm counting him here.

9. Portland Trail Blazers, 6: Bill Walton, Clyde Drexler, Arvydas Sabonis, Scottie Pippen, Jack Ramsay (coach), Bill Schonely (broadcaster). Pippen was only a Blazer for 3 seasons, but that included a trip to the Western Conference Finals, when they were probably cheated out of the NBA Finals by the Lakers, so I'm counting him here.

10. Milwaukee Bucks, 6: Oscar Robertson, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Bob Lanier, Don Nelson (coach), Wayne Embry (executive), Eddie Doucette (broadcaster).

11. Indiana Pacers, 6: Mel Daniels, Roger Brown, Reggie Miller, Chris Mullin, Bob "Slick" Leonard (coach), Jack Ramsay (coach). Although Larry Bird was a head coach and executive for them, that's not why he was elected, and so he can't be counted here.

Minneapolis Lakers 6: George Mikan, Jim Pollard, Slater Martin, Clyde Lovellette, Vern Mikkelsen, John Kundla (coach). Essentially, their starting 5 and their head coach for their 5 NBA Championships in 6 seasons, 1949-54. Bud Grant, the Hall of Fame coach of the Minnesota Vikings, also played for the Minneapolis edition of the Lakers, but obviously he can't be counted here.

12. Utah Jazz, 5: Adrian Dantley, John Stockton, Karl Malone, Jerry Sloan (coach), Rod Hundley (broadcaster).

13. Atlanta Hawks, 5: Walt Bellamy, Pete Maravich, Dominique Wilkens, Dikembe Mutombo, Lenny Wilkens (coach). 'Nique and Lenny spell their names differently, and are not related. Lenny played for the Hawks, but that was in St. Louis.


14. Denver Nuggets, 5: Dan Issel, David Thompson, Alex English, Dikembe Mutombo, Larry Brown (coach).

Cincinnati Royals, 5: Jack Twyman, Oscar Robertson, Jerry Lucas, Nate "Tiny" Archibald, Wayne Embry.

Fort Wayne Pistons, 5: Andy Phillip, Bob Houbregs, Bobby McDermontt, George Yardley, Fred Zollner (owner).

14. Miami Heat, 4: Shaquille O'Neal, Alonzo Mourning, Gary Payton (2 years, I'm relaxing the rule for him), Pat Riley (coach & executive). Dwyane Wade and LeBron James will be elected. Tim Hardaway and Chris Bosh also might be.

15. Phoenix Suns, 4: Connie Hawkins, Charles Barkley, Jerry Colangelo (owner), Al McCoy (broadcaster). Despite being at least competitive, and usually very good, for most of their 48 seasons in the NBA, the Suns have really been short-changed. Paul Westphal (who played and coached for the Suns), Kevin Johnson, Dan Majerle and coach Lowell "Cotton" Fitzsimmons should all be in the Hall by now. Cases could also be made for Alvan Adams, Walter Davis, and coach John MacLeod. If Grant Hill is ever elected, it will be for what he did at Duke, but he can be counted here.

Seattle SuperSonics, 4: Lenny Wilkens (player & coach), Spencer Haywood, Dennis Johnson, Gary Payton.

Baltimore Bullets, 4: Buddy Jeannette (player-coach), Gus Johnson, Earl Monroe, Wes Unseld. There were actually 2 separate teams with this name, 1947-54 and 1963-73. Unseld spent most of his career with the franchise in Washington, but played 5 seasons with them in Baltimore.

Syracuse Nationals, 4: Al Cervi (player & coach), Dolph Schayes, Earl Lloyd, Danny Biasone (owner, whose idea for the 24-second shot clock may have made the NBA's long-term survival possible).
16. San Antonio Spurs, 3: George Gervin, Artis Gilmore, David Robinson. Tim Duncan, Manu Ginobili and coach Gregg Popovich will join them, and Tony Parker might.
17. Cleveland Cavaliers, 3: Wayne Embry (player & executive), Lenny Wilkens (coach), Joe Tait (broadcaster). LeBron James, of course, will be added eventually.
18. New York/New Jersey/Brooklyn Nets, 3: Julius Erving, Drazen Petrovic, Bill Raftery (broadcaster). Eventually, Jason Kidd and Vince Carter will probably be added. As should Buck Williams, but he probably won't make it.
No, you can't count Rick Barry (played briefly for them in the ABA), Billy Cunningham (ditto), Lou Carnesecca (coached them to an ABA Division title between stints at St. John's), Larry Brown (coached them 2 seasons), Chuck Daly (ditto), or even, due to his later broadcast work for the Nets, Marv Albert (appropriately, on the network named YES!).
20. Washington Bullets/Wizards, 3: Elvin Hayes, Wes Unseld, Bernard King. Says a lot for this franchise that they've had none for the last 25 years.
Buffalo Braves, 2: Bob McAdoo, Jack Ramsay (coach).
21. Toronto Raptors, 1: Lenny Wilkens (coach). Vince Carter will probably be elected, and can be counted as a Raptor. No, you can't count Isiah Thomas as a Raptors executive -- and why would you want to?
22. Orlando Magic, 1: Shaquille O'Neal. No, you can't count Dominique Wilkins (1 season), Patrick Ewing (2, plus was an assistant coach) or Chuck Daly (2 seasons as a coach). If Grant Hill is ever elected, it will be for what he did at Duke, but he can be counted here.
23. Charlotte Hornets, 1: Alonzo Mourning. No, you can't count owner Michael Jordan.
24. Sacramento Kings, 1: Mitch Richmond.
25. Dallas Mavericks, 1: Don Nelson (coach). Dirk Nowitzki and Jason Kidd will make it.
New Orleans Jazz, 1: Pete Maravich.  Only played half of the team's first season in Utah, yet has his Number 7 retired by both the Jazz and the Pelicans.
26. Oklahoma City Thunder, none: A bit too soon to tell, but Kevin Durant could be their first HOFer, unless current head coach Scott Brooks gets in first.
27. New Orleans Pelicans, none: If Chris Paul is elected, he can be counted with this franchise, even though he only played for them as the Hornets.
28. Memphis Grizzlies, none: No, you can't count Jerry West for his time as a Grizzlies executive. If Pau Gasol is elected, he can be counted, although he'll most likely be remembered mainly as a Laker.
29. Minnesota Timberwolves, none: No, you can't count Kevin McHale (coach & executive). You can, when he is elected, count Kevin Garnett. If Christian Laettner is ever elected, it will be for what he did at Duke, but he can be counted here.
30. Los Angeles Clippers, none: No, you can't count longtime executive Elgin Baylor. Nor can you count Bill Walton, who hardly played for the franchise, and left before they were moved from San Diego to Los Angeles. As for current players, such consideration is still very premature.
*
Now, for each team's living Hall-of-Famers. In this case, I'll count only the current teams:
1. Boston Celtics, 15: Bob Cousy, Frank Ramsey, Tommy Heinsohn, Bill Russell, K.C. Jones, Sam Jones, Satch Sanders, John Havlicek, Bailey Howell, Dave Cowens, Jo Jo White, Larry Bird, Kevin McHale, Robert Parish, Tiny Archibald.
2. New York Knicks, 13: Richie Guerin, Willis Reed, Walt Frazier, Bill Bradley, Earl Monroe, Jerry Lucas, Spencer Haywood, Bernard King, Patrick Ewing, Pat Riley, Bob Wolff, Marv Albert, John Andariese.

3. Los Angeles Lakers, 12: Elgin Baylor, Jerry West, Gail Goodrich, Wilt Chamberlain, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Jamaal Wilkes, Magic Johnson, Bob McAdoo, James Worthy, Shaquille O'Neal, Pat Riley, Phil Jackson.

4. Chicago Bulls, 8: Chet Walker, Artis Gilmore, Jerry Sloan, Michael Jordan, Scottie Pippen, Dennis Rodman, Phil Jackson, Jerry Reinsdorf.

5. Detroit Pistons, 8: Bailey Howell, Bob Lanier, Dave Bing, Isiah Thomas, Joe Dumars, Dennis Rodman, Larry Brown, Bob Wolff.

6. Houston Rockets, 7: Elvin Hayes, Calvin Murphy, Ralph Sampson, Hakeem Olajuwon, Clyde Drexler, Dikembe Mutombo, Yao Ming. 

7. Philadelphia 76ers, 7: Hal Greer, Chet Walker, Billy Cunningham, Julius Erving, Charles Barkley, Allen Iverson, Larry Brown.

8. San Francisco/Golden State Warriors, 7: Nate Thurmond, Rick Barry, Jamaal Wilkes, Robert Parish, Chris Mullin, Sarunas Marciulionis, Don Nelson..

9. Milwaukee Bucks, 6: Oscar Robertson, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Bob Lanier, Don Nelson, Wayne Embry, Eddie Doucette.

10. Portland Trail Blazers, 5: Bill Walton, Clyde Drexler, Arvydas Sabonis, Scottie Pippen, Bill Schonely.

11. Atlanta Hawks, 5: Walt Bellamy, Dominique Wilkens, Dikembe Mutombo, Lenny Wilkens.

12. Denver Nuggets, 5: Dan Issel, David Thompson, Alex English, Dikembe Mutombo, Larry Brown.

13. Miami Heat, 4: Shaquille O'Neal, Alonzo Mourning, Gary Payton, Pat Riley.

14. Utah Jazz, 4: Adrian Dantley, John Stockton, Karl Malone, Jerry Sloan.

15. Phoenix Suns, 4: Connie Hawkins, Charles Barkley, Jerry Colangelo, Al McCoy.

16. San Antonio Spurs, 3: George Gervin, Artis Gilmore, David Robinson.

17. Washington Bullets/Wizards, 3: Elvin Hayes, Wes Unseld, Bernard King.

18. Cleveland Cavaliers, 3: Wayne Embry, Lenny Wilkens, Joe Tait.

19. Indiana Pacers, 3: Reggie Miller, Chris Mullin, Slick Leonard.

20. New York/New Jersey/Brooklyn Nets, 2: Julius Erving, Bill Raftery.

21. Toronto Raptors, 1: Lenny Wilkens.

22. Orlando Magic, 1: Shaquille O'Neal.

23. Charlotte Hornets, 1: Alonzo Mourning.

24. Sacramento Kings, 1: Mitch Richmond.

25. Dallas Mavericks, 1: Don Nelson.
26. Oklahoma City Thunder, none.

27. New Orleans Pelicans, none.

28. Memphis Grizzlies, none.

29. Minnesota Timberwolves, none.

30. Los Angeles Clippers, none.

Hockey Hall-of-Famers By Team -- 2016 Edition

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After doing this for basketball earlier, upon hearing of the new electees, I realized I've never done this for hockey.

Players qualify for the team in question if they played for them for 4 years, although I may bend this rule if they played less by were a key contributor on a Stanley Cup-winning team. Some, of course, qualify for more than 1 team.

Players arranged in chronological order, followed by head coaches, executives, and broadcasters.

Ties broken by fewer seasons, then by most players (as opposed to other categories), then by most non-broadcasters.

I'm only counting teams that have existed since the end of World War II, the start of the so-called "Original Six" era.

1. Toronto Maple Leafs, 60: Harry Cameron, Rusty Crawford, Cecil "Babe" Dye, Reg Noble, Jack Adams, Clarence "Hap" Day, Irvine "Ace" Bailey, George "Red" Horner, Joe Primeau, Charlie Conacher, Harvey "Busher" Jackson, Francis "King" Clancy, George Hainsworth, Syl Apps, Walter "Turk" Broda, David "Sweeney" Schriner, Walter "Babe" Pratt, Gordie Drillon, Ted "Teeder" Kennedy, Harry Watson, Max Bentley, Fern Flaman, Harry Lumley, George Armstrong, Leo Boivin, Tim Horton, Dick Duff, Bob Pulford, Frank Mahovlich, Johnny Bower, Bert Olmstead, Allan Stanley, Leonard "Red" Kelly, Terry Sawchuk, Marcel Pronovost, Dave Keon, Norm Ullman, Darryl Sittler, Lanny McDonald, Borje Salming, Doug Gilmour, Mats Sundin and Ed Belfour.

Also: J.P. Bickell (executive), Conn Smythe (owner), Frank Selke (executive), Dick Irvin Sr. (coach), Frank Mathers (executive), Harold Ballard (owner), George "Punch" Imlach (coach), Jim Gregory (executive), Cliff Fletcher (executive), Pat Burns (coach), Foster Hewitt (broadcaster), Howie Meeker (broadcaster, also played for them), Wes McKnight (broadcaster), Brian McFarlane (broadcaster), Bob Cole (broadcaster), Bill Hewitt (broadcaster), Harry Neale (broadcaster).

Surprise: The Leafs are Number 1! This despite having only 7 Hall-of-Fame players in the last 50 years, and only 2 in the last 20. Al Arbour played for the Leafs, winning 3 Cups, but was elected as a coach, and never coached them, so he can't be included with them. Bud Poile played for them, winning 3 Cups, but was elected as a "Builder," and never worked in their front office.

2. Montreal Canadiens, 59: Jack Laviolette, Didier Pitre, Eduoard "Newsy" Lalonde, Georges Vezina, Sprague Cleghorn, Joe Malone, Aurele Joliat, Howie Morenz, Sylvio Mantha, George Hainsworth, Hector "Toe" Blake (elected as player but better known as coach), Elmer Lach, Bill Durnan, Emile "Butch" Bouchard, Kenny Reardon, Buddy O'Connor, Doug Harvey, Dickie Moore, Bernie "Boom-Boom" Geoffrion, Jean Beliveau, Jacques Plante, Tom Johnson, Henri Richard, Bert Olmstead, Lorne "Gump" Worsley, Dick Duff, Jacques Laperriere, Yvan Cournoyer, Guy Lapointe, Jacques Lemaire, Serge Savard, Frank Mahovlich, Ken Dryden, Steve Shutt, Larry Robinson, Guy Lafleur, Bob Gainey, Rod Langway, Chris Chelios, Patrick Roy and Denis Savard.

Also: Dick Irvin Sr. (coach), Ambrose O'Brien (founder-owner), Donat Raymond (owner), William Northey (executive), Leo Dandurand (owner), Joe Cattarinich (owner), Tommy Gorman (executive), Hartland Molson (owner), Frank Selke (executive), Sam Pollock (executive), Scotty Bowman (coach), Pat Burns (coach), Danny Gallivan (broadcaster), Rene Lecavalier (broadcaster), Doug Smith (broadcaster), Dick Irvin Jr. (broadcaster), Richard Garneau (broadcaster), Gilles Tremblay (broadcaster, also played for them).

I expected to see the Habs at Number 1. Who among their greats could tip the balance? Possibilities include Guy Carbonneau, Eric Desjardins and John LeClair from the 1993 Cup win.

3. Detroit Red Wings, 44: George Hay, Reg Noble, Ebenezer "Ebbie" Goodfellow, Herbie Lewis, Syd Howe, Marty Barry, Jack Stewart, Sid Abel (also broadcaster), Bill Quackenbush, Ted Lindsay, Harry Lumley, Gordie Howe, Leonard "Red" Kelly, Marcel Pronovost, Terry Sawchuk, Alex Delvecchio, Glenn Hall, Norm Ullman, Bill Gadsby, Marcel Dionne, Dino Ciccarelli, Adam Oates, Steve Yzerman, Sergei Fedorov, Viacheslav Fetisov, Nicklas Lidstrom, Igor Larionov, Brendan Shanahan, Larry Murphy, Dominik Hasek, Brett Hull and Chris Chelios.

Also: James E. Norris (owner), James D. Norris (owner), Jack Adams (executive), Tommy Ivan (coach), Bruce Norris (owner), John Ziegler (executive), Mike Ilitch (owner), Scotty Bowman (coach), Jim Devellano (executive), Budd Lynch (broadcaster), Bruce Martyn (broadcaster), Mickey Redmond (broadcaster, also played for them).

4. New York Rangers, 35: Frank Boucher, Bill Cook, Frederick "Bun" Cook, Ivan "Ching" Johnson, Earl Seibert, Albert "Babe" Siebert, Lynn Patrick, Walter "Babe" Pratt, Art Coulter, Neil Colville, Bryan Hextall, Clint Smith, Edgar Laprade, Chuck Rayner, Buddy O'Connor, Allan Stanley, Harry Howell, Lorne "Gump" Worsley, Andy Bathgate, Bill Gadsby, Eddie Giacomin, Rod Gilbert, Jean Ratelle, Brad Park, Phil Esposito, Brian Leetch, Mike Gartner and Mark Messier.

Also: Lester Patrick (coach), Bill Jennings (executive), Emile Francis (coach), Roger Neilson (coach), Glen Sather (executive), Sal Messina (broadcaster), John Davidson (broadcaster, also played for them).

Adam Graves is not in. Nor has Vic Hadfield yet joined his "Goal-A-Game Line" mates Gilbert and Ratelle. If you grew up in the 1970s and '80s like I did, don't count on seeing Dave Malone, Ron Greschner or, God forbid, Ron Duguay getting in. No, you can't count Wayne Gretzky (3 seasons, none a Cup or even a Finals season). I'm even stretching it a bit to count Gartner (4 seasons, though not 4 full). The Rangers' spectacular failures in the 2012, '14 and '15 Playoffs may prevent any recent players from getting in, unless Henrik Lundqvist gets traded and wins a Cup elsewhere.

5. Boston Bruins, 32: Eddie Shore, Harry Oliver, Aubrey "Dit" Clapper, Ralph "Cooney" Weiland, Clarence "Tiny" Thompson, Marty Barry, Bobby Bauer, Woody Dumart, Milt Schmidt, Bill Cowley, Roy Conacher, Nels Stewart, Frank Brimsek, Fern Flaman, Bill Quackenbush, Leo Boivin, Johnny Bucyk, Bobby Orr, Phil Esposito, Gerry Cheevers, Brad Park, Jean Ratelle, Ray Bourque, Cam Neely, Adam Oates, Charles Adams (owner), Art Ross (coach), Weston Adams (owner), Walter Brown (executive), Harry Sinden (executive), Fred Cusick (broadcaster), Bob Wilson (broadcaster).

6. Chicago Blackhawks, 26: Charlie Gardiner, Art Coulter, Earl Seibert, Doug Bentley, Max Bentley, Bill Mosienko, Bill Gadsby, Roy Conacher, Pierre Pilote, Glenn Hall, Bobby Hull, Stan Mikita, Phil Esposito, Tony Esposito, Denis Savard, Ed Belfour, Michel Goulet, Chis Chelios, Frederic McLaughlin (owner), James D. Norris (owner), Tommy Ivan (executive), Rudy Pilous (coach), Arthur Wirtz (owner), Bill Wirtz (owner), Lloyd Pettit (broadcaster), Pat Foley (broadcaster).

7. St. Louis Blues, 13: Glenn Hall, Doug Harvey, Bernie Federko, Joe Mullen, Doug Gilmour, Brett Hull, Al MacInnis, Brendan Shanahan, Grant Fuhr, Chris Pronger, Scotty Bowman (coach) Emile Francis (coach), Dan Kelly (broadcaster).

8. New Jersey Devils, 11: Brendan Shanahan, Peter Stastny, Viacheslav Fetisov, Scott Stevens, Scott Niedermayer, Joe Nieuwendyk. Lou Lamoriello (executive), Jacques Lemaire (coach), Larry Robinson (coach), Pat Burns (coach), Mike Emrick (broadcaster).

Didn't think the Devils would be so high, did you? And that's with Martin Brodeur not yet eligible. I'm stretching things by including Nieuwendyk, a Devil for a season and a half, but the full season was a Cup season, and if the Avalanche get to count Ray Bourque, the Devils get to count Nieuwendyk.

9. Calgary Flames, 11: Al MacInnis, Lanny McDonald, Joe Nieuwendyk, Doug Gilmour, Joe Mullen, Phil Housley, Harley Hotchkiss (owner), Doc Seaman (owner), Cliff Fletcher (executive), Bob Johnson (coach), Peter Maher (broadcaster).

10. Pittsburgh Penguins, 11: Mario Lemieux, Paul Coffey, Bryan Trottier, Larry Murphy, Joe Mullen, Ron Francis, Craig Patrick (executive), Bob Johnson (coach), Scotty Bowman (coach), Herb Brooks (executive), Mike Lange (broadcaster).

11. Buffalo Sabres, 10: Gilbert Perreault, Phil Housley, Dale Hawerchuk, Pat LaFontaine, Dominik Hasek, Seymour Knox (owner), George "Punch" Imlach (coach), Scotty Bowman (coach), Ted Darling (broadcaster), Rick Jeanneret (broadcaster). Things might have been very different if either the 1975 or the 1999 Finals had turned their way.

12. Los Angeles Kings, 10: Marcel Dionne, Larry Murphy, Luc Robitaille, Wayne Gretzky, Rob Blake, Larry Murphy, Jake Milford (executive), Jiggs McDonald (broadcaster), Bob Miller (broadcaster), Nick Nickson (broadcaster). This number will likely rise significantly after the players from the 2012 and '14 Cup wins become eligible.

13. New York Islanders, 9: Billy Smith, Denis Potvin, Clark Gillies, Bryan Trottier, Mike Bossy, Pat LaFontaine, Al Arbour (coach), Bill Torrey (executive), Jiggs McDonald (broadcaster). It says a lot of this franchise that LaFontaine is the only significant addition in the last 30 years.

14. Edmonton Oilers, 8: Wayne Gretzky, Mark Messier, Paul Coffey, Jari Kurri, Glenn Anderson, Grant Fuhr, Glen Sather (coach, also played for them), Rod Phillips (broadcaster).

15. Philadelphia Flyers, 8: Bernie Parent, Bobby Clarke, Bill Barber, Mark Howe, Ed Snider (owner), Keith Allen (executive), Fred Shero (coach), Gene Hart (broadcaster). Ron Hextall, Eric Lindros, Eric Desjardins and John LeClair are eligible.

16. Washington Capitals, 6: Mike Gartner, Rod Langway, Scott Stevens, Larry Murphy, Adam Oates, Ron Weber (broadcaster). Alexander Ovechkin is still active. Peter Bondra is eligible, and should be in. Dale Hunter is also eligible, but don't hold your breath.

Hartford Whalers, 6: Dave Keon, Gordie Howe, Mark Howe, Ron Francis, Emile Francis (executive), Chuck Kaiton (broadcaster). No, you can't count the last few games of a washed-up Bobby Hull.

17. Colorado Avalanche, 5: Joe Sakic, Peter Forsberg, Patrick Roy, Rob Blake, Ray Bourque (a stretch, since he was with them for only a year and a half, but that included a Cup in which he did play a key role despite his advanced age).

18. Dallas Stars, 4: Mike Modano, Joe Nieuwendyk, Ed Belfour, Brett Hull (3 seasons, but 1 and nearly 2 were Cup seasons).

19. Vancouver Canucks, 4: Pavel Bure, Frank Griffiths (owner), Jake Milford (executive), Jim Robson (broadcaster). That's right: 46 years, 4 guys. Trevor Linden is eligible, but not in.

Quebec Nordiques, 4: Michel Goulet, Peter Stastny, Joe Sakic, Mats Sundin.

Minnesota North Stars, 4: Lorne "Gump" Worsley, Dino Ciccarelli, Mike Modano, Al Shaver (broadcaster). 

20. Carolina Hurricanes, 2: Ron Francis, Chuck Kaiton (broadcaster). No, you can't count any of the other Whaler Hall-of-Famers. You could count Rod Brind'Amour if he gets in, and he is eligible.

21. Anaheim Ducks, 2: Scott Niedermayer, Chris Pronger (3 seasons, but 1 was the Cup season). Paul Kariya is eligible. Teemu Selanne becomes eligible next year.

22. Florida Panthers, 2: Pavel Bure, Bill Torrey (executive). Bure only played 3 seasons with them, so this is a bit of a strech. No, you can't count Denis Potvin as a broadcaster.

23. Winnipeg Jets, 2: Bobby Hull, Dale Hawerchuk. That's both the old version (became the Coyotes in 1996) and the new version (had been the Thrashers until 2011). Keith Tkachuk is eligible. Teemu Selanne and Jean-Sebastien Giguere become eligible next year.

Atlanta Flames, 2: Cliff Fletcher (executive), Jiggs McDonald (broadcaster). The closest they came to having a Hall of Fame player was... um... well... they had Ken Houston. But this was not the great safety who's in the Pro Football Hall of Fame, merely a contemporary.

24. Columbus Blue Jackets, 1: Sergei Fedorov. Only 3 seasons, so this was a bit of a stretch. Rick Nash is not yet eligible.

25. Minnesota Wild, 1: Jacques Lemaire (coach). Marian Gaborik, now with the Kings, might be the 1st player elected, but he's still active.

26. Nashville Predators, none: Shea Weber might be the 1st, but he's still active.

27. Arizona Coyotes, none: They had Mike Gartner for 2 seasons and Brett Hull for part of 1. No, you can't count former owner, GM and coach Wayne Gretzky.

28. Tampa Bay Lightning, none: Denis Savard and Dino Ciccarelli each played 2 seasons for them. Dave Andreychuk, who would count as a Bolts HOFer, is eligible. Martin St. Louis, Vincent Lecavalier and Steven Stamkos, as yet, are not. No, you can't count original GM Phil Esposito.

29. Ottawa Senators, none: Dominik Hasek played 1 season for them. Daniel Alfredsson is not yet eligible. No, you can't count players from the original Senators, unless you want to let Canucks fans count players from the old Vancouver Millionaires.

30. San Jose Sharks, none: They had Igor Larionov and Rob Blake for 2 seasons each, and Ed Belfour for part of 1. Owen Nolan is eligible. Patrick Marleau and Joe Thornton, as yet, are not.

Atlanta Thrashers, none: Chris Chelios is, thus far, the only Hall-of-Famer to have played so much as a shift for them.

Colorado Rockies, none: Lanny McDonald was the only Hall-of-Famer who played for them before their move to become the Devils.

Cleveland Barons, none: The closest thing they had to a Hall-of-Famer was having Harry Howell as general manager.

Kansas City Scouts, none: They didn't even come as close as the Barons.

*

Now, for the living Hall-of-Famers. As with basketball, I'll count only the current teams:

1. Detroit Red Wings, 25: Ted Lindsay, Gordie Howe, Leonard "Red" Kelly, Alex Delvecchio, Glenn Hall, Norm Ullman, Marcel Dionne, Dino Ciccarelli, Adam Oates, Steve Yzerman, Sergei Fedorov, Viacheslav Fetisov, Nicklas Lidstrom, Igor Larionov, Brendan Shanahan, Larry Murphy, Dominik Hasek, Brett Hull, Chris Chelios, John Ziegler, Mike Ilitch, Scotty Bowman, Jim Devellano, Bruce Martyn, Mickey Redmond.

2. Toronto Maple Leafs, 22: George Armstrong, Leo Boivin, Dick Duff, Bob Pulford, Frank Mahovlich, Johnny Bower, Bert Olmstead, Leonard "Red" Kelly, Dave Keon, Norm Ullman, Darryl Sittler, Lanny McDonald, Borje Salming, Doug Gilmour, Mats Sundin, Ed Belfour, Jim Gregory, Cliff Fletcher, Howie Meeker, Brian McFarlane, Bob Cole, Harry Neale.

3. Montreal Canadiens, 19: Henri Richard, Dick Duff, Jacques Laperriere, Yvan Cournoyer, Guy Lapointe, Jacques Lemaire, Serge Savard, Frank Mahovlich, Ken Dryden, Steve Shutt, Larry Robinson, Guy Lafleur, Bob Gainey, Rod Langway, Chris Chelios, Patrick Roy, Denis Savard, Scotty Bowman, Dick Irvin Jr.

4. New York Rangers, 13: Harry Howell, Eddie Giacomin, Rod Gilbert, Jean Ratelle, Brad Park, Phil Esposito, Brian Leetch, Mike Gartner, Mark Messier, Emile Francis, Glen Sather, Sal Messina, John Davidson.

5. Boston Bruins, 12: Milt Schmidt, Leo Boivin, Johnny Bucyk, Bobby Orr, Phil Esposito, Gerry Cheevers, Brad Park, Jean Ratelle, Ray Bourque, Cam Neely, Adam Oates, Harry Sinden.

6. St. Louis Blues, 11: Glenn Hall, Bernie Federko, Joe Mullen, Doug Gilmour, Brett Hull, Al MacInnis, Brendan Shanahan, Grant Fuhr, Chris Pronger, Scotty Bowman, Emile Francis.

7. Chicago Blackhawks, 11: Pierre Pilote, Glenn Hall, Bobby Hull, Stan Mikita, Phil Esposito, Tony Esposito, Denis Savard, Ed Belfour, Michel Goulet, Chis Chelios, Pat Foley.

8. New Jersey Devils, 10: Brendan Shanahan, Peter Stastny, Viacheslav Fetisov, Scott Stevens, Scott Niedermayer, Joe Nieuwendyk. Lou Lamoriello, Jacques Lemaire, Larry Robinson, Mike Emrick.

9. Pittsburgh Penguins, 9: Mario Lemieux, Paul Coffey, Bryan Trottier, Larry Murphy, Joe Mullen, Ron Francis, Craig Patrick, Scotty Bowman, Mike Lange.

10. Los Angeles Kings, 9: Marcel Dionne, Larry Murphy, Luc Robitaille, Wayne Gretzky, Rob Blake, Larry Murphy, Jiggs McDonald, Bob Miller, Nick Nickson.

11. Calgary Flames, 8: Al MacInnis, Lanny McDonald, Joe Nieuwendyk, Doug Gilmour, Joe Mullen, Phil Housley, Cliff Fletcher, Peter Maher.

12. Edmonton Oilers, 8: Wayne Gretzky, Mark Messier, Paul Coffey, Jari Kurri, Glenn Anderson, Grant Fuhr, Glen Sather, Rod Phillips.

13. New York Islanders, 8: Billy Smith, Denis Potvin, Clark Gillies, Bryan Trottier, Mike Bossy, Pat LaFontaine, Bill Torrey, Jiggs McDonald.

14. Buffalo Sabres, 7: Gilbert Perreault, Phil Housley, Dale Hawerchuk, Pat LaFontaine, Dominik Hasek, Scotty Bowman, Rick Jeanneret.

15. Washington Capitals, 6: Mike Gartner, Rod Langway, Scott Stevens, Larry Murphy, Adam Oates, Ron Weber.

16. Colorado Avalanche, 5: Joe Sakic, Peter Forsberg, Patrick Roy, Rob Blake, Ray Bourque.

17. Philadelphia Flyers, 5: Bernie Parent, Bobby Clarke, Bill Barber, Mark Howe, Ed Snider.

18. Dallas Stars, 4: Mike Modano, Joe Nieuwendyk, Ed Belfour, Brett Hull.

19. Carolina Hurricanes, 2: Ron Francis, Chuck Kaiton.

20. Anaheim Ducks, 2: Scott Niedermayer, Chris Pronger.

21. Florida Panthers, 2: Pavel Bure, Bill Torrey.

22. Winnipeg Jets, 2: Bobby Hull, Dale Hawerchuk.

23. Vancouver Canucks, 2: Pavel Bure, Jim Robson.

24. Columbus Blue Jackets, 1: Sergei Fedorov.

25. Minnesota Wild, 1: Jacques Lemaire.

26. Nashville Predators, none.

27. Arizona Coyotes, none.

28. Tampa Bay Lightning, none: Denis Savard and Dino Ciccarelli each played 2 seasons for them. Dave Andreychuk, who would count as a Bolts HOFer, is eligible. Martin St. Louis, Vincent Lecavalier and Steven Stamkos, as yet, are not. No, you can't count original GM Phil Esposito.

29. Ottawa Senators, none.

30. San Jose Sharks, none.

Girardi Ruins Opening Day

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Eddie Sawyer was the manager of the Philadelphia Phillies when he led the team, nicknamed the Whiz Kids, to the 1950 National League Pennant.

They didn't win another, he was fired after the 1950 season, they still didn't get back on track, and, in 1958, he was hired back. But he quit after the opening game of the 1960 season, saying, "I'm 49 years old, and I'd like to live to be 50."

He never managed again, but remained in the game as a scout. He lived to be 87.

*

Today, pushed back a day by inclement weather, the Yankees opened the 2016 Major League Baseball season, at home at Yankee Stadium II, against the team that knocked them out of the postseason last year, the Houston Astros.

I'm 46 years old. I want Joe Girardi to be fired as Yankee manager, because I'd like to live to be 47.

Things started off well today. New 2nd baseman Starlin Castro hit a 2-run double in the bottom of the 2nd, Masahiro Tanaka pitched well, and it was 2-1 Yankees going into the top of the 6th.

But the Astros threatened. Girardi looked at his pitch count, saw that Tanaka had now thrown 87 pitches, and looked into his damn Binder, and saw that it read, "Pitchers today are not men. They are babies. They cannot be trusted to throw more than 87 pitches. Do not trust the starter to go any further. Take him out."

Now, I could complain about the blatant running outside the baseline that led to Dellin Betances' game-costing throw in the 8th, leading to 3 Astro runs, which Didi Gregorius' home run was not enough to overcome.

I won't. Because, after his bullpen stupidity cost the Yankees 20 games last season, Girardi pulled Tanaka for Chasen Shreve, whom he then let pitch through the 7th. Shreve didn't do all that badly, but because he didn't, he should have been allowed to continue through the 8th. Instead, Girardi brought in Betances.

Also, the Yankees got only 4 hits all game long: Gregorius' homer, Castro's double, and singles by Carlos Beltran and Brian McCann. Jacoby Ellsbury went 0-for-4 at the top of the order. Aaron Hicks and pinch-hitter Brett Gardner, between them, went 0-for-3 with a walk at 2nd in the order. Alex Rodriguez, in October form, went 0-for-3 with a walk batting 3rd. Mark Teixeira, getting no protection from A-Rod, went 0-for-3 with a walk batting 4th. So the top 4 guys in the order, between them, went 0-for-13, though they did come up with 3 walks -- an on-base percentage of .188. Pathetic.

Between the hitters' weak bats and Girardi's weak brain, Opening Day was ruined.

Astros 5, Yankees 3. Winning Pitcher: Dallas Kuechel (1-0). Save: Luke Gregerson (1). Losing Pitcher: Betances (0-1).

The series continues tomorrow night, with Michael Pineda starting against Collin McHugh.

Yanks Bounce Back With 16-Run Onslaught

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Nobody likes to lose on Opening Day. All the hope of "Everybody starts out 0-0," and "Everybody has a chance," drifts away when you're 0-1.

And the 2nd game of the Yankees' season, also home to the Houston Astros, looked very unsettling at first. Carlos Correa, last year's American League Rookie of the Year, hit a home run off Michael Pineda, so the Yankees were down 1-0 before they even got to bat.

But in the bottom of the 1st, the Yankees put up the kind of inning we have rarely seen since 2009. Jacoby Ellsbury led off -- ugh -- and reached 1st base on that rarest of plays, catcher's interference. (Astros cheating again?) Collin McHugh then loaded the bases with nobody out by walking Brett Gardner and Alex Rodriguez. Mark Teixeira moved the runners over a base with an RBI single. Brian McCann doubled to right, scoring Gardner and A-Rod. Carlos Beltran got Teix home on a groundout. Chase Headley singled home McCann.

Exit Astro starter Collin McHugh, enter Michael Feliz. Headley stole 2nd. New guy Starlin Castro singled him home. 6-0 Yankees.

So, we're cruising, right? Not for long. Top of the 2nd, Pineda loaded the bases, and allowed a grand slam to Springer. 6-5 Yankees. And we're all thinking, "Here we go again."

But the Yankees dominated the rest of the way. They came right back in the bottom of the 2nd, with a McCann walk, a Beltran single, and Castro's 1st Yankee home run. 9-5 Yankees.

In the 3rd, Ellsbury led off with a single and stole 2nd. Gardner walked, making the stolen base pointless. A-Rod struck out, but Teixeira sent a Teix Message. 12-5 Yankees.

Correa took Pineda deep again in the 5th. That's 6 runs in 5 innings. Not good. Joe Girardi brought Ivan Nova in for the 6th, and he pitched scoreless ball the rest of the way. Gee, maybe he should have started. As somebody said on Twitter, did you ever think you'd see Ivan Nova leading the team in saves?

Beltran homered to lead off the bottom of the 6th. McCann singled in the 7th, followed by a single by Aaron Hicks, and Ronald Torreyes, a 23-year-old Venezuelan infielder making his Yankee debut (wearing Number 17), tripled them home. Castro singled home Torreyes.

We played a team from Texas, and got a football score. Yankees 16, Astros 6. I like it when the Yankees have 16-run onslaughts.

WP: Pineda (1-0, barely deserving it). SV: Nova (1). LP: McHugh (0-1).

The series continues this afternoon, weather permitting. (As of 3:36, about half an hour before 1st pitch, they were anticipating starting on time.) Nathan Eovaldi starts for the Good Guys, Mike Fiers for the interlopers.

Come on you Pinstripes!

*

I haven't done a countdown for a while: 

Days until Arsenal play again: 2, this Saturday, 7:45 AM our time, away to club West Ham United. It will be the Guners' last visit ever to the Boleyn Ground, a.k.a. Upton Park. Next season, after 112 years as home to the East End club, the Hammers will leave for the 2012 Olympic Stadium.

Days until the New York Red Bulls play again: 2, this Saturday night at 7:00, home to Sporting Kansas City.

Days until the 1st Yankees-Red Sox series of the season: 15, on Friday, April 22, taking on the baseball version of The Scum at Fenway Park. A little over 2 weeks.

Days until the Red Bulls play a "derby": 43, on Friday night, May 13, against D.C. United (a.k.a. The DC Scum), at Robert F. Kennedy Stadium in Washington. They next play New York City F.C. (a.k.a. Man City NYC and The Homeless) on Saturday afternoon, May 21, at Yankee Stadium II. They next play the Philadelphia Union on Sunday night, July 17, at Talen Energy Stadium (formerly PPL Park) in Chester, Pennsylvania. And the next game against the New England Revolution is on Sunday night, August 28, at Red Bull Arena in Harrison, New Jersey.

Days until the 2016 Copa America kicks off in the U.S.: 57, on Friday, June 3. A little over 2 months.

Days until Euro 2016 kicks off in France: 64, on Friday, June 10.

Days until Arsenal play as the opponents in the 2016 Major League Soccer All-Star Game: 112, on Thursday night, July 28, at Avaya Stadium in San Jose, California, home of the San Jose Earthquakes. A little under 3 months. Three days later, Arsenal will play C.D. Guadalajara, a.k.a. Chivas, one of the biggest clubs in Mexico, at the StubHub Center, home of the Los Angeles Galaxy, in Carson, California. This will be just 2 years after The Arsenal came to America to play the Red Bulls in New Jersey. I went to that one. I don't think I'll be going to either of these: Even if I could get a game ticket, paying for a plane ticket would be difficult.

Days until the 2016 Olympics begin in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil: 167, on Friday, August 5.


Days until the next North London Derby: Unknown, but at least 135. The 2016-17 Premier League season is likely to open on Saturday, August 20, but it's unlikely that Arsenal will play Tottenham (a.k.a. The Scum) in the opener.
 
Days until Rutgers University plays football again: 149, on Saturday, September 3, away to the University of Washington, in Seattle. A little under 5 months.

Days until East Brunswick High School plays football again: 155, on Friday, September 9, probably away, since, while the 2016 schedule hasn't been released yet, the Big Green opened last season at home.
Days until the New Jersey Devils play another local rival: Unknown, but at least 203. They have 2 games left, hosting the Tampa Bay Lightning tonight and the Toronto Maple Leafs on Saturday night. They missed the Playoffs for the 4th straight season. Still, they came a lot closer under new head coach John Hynes and new general manager Ray Shero, so there is reason to hope for a good 2016-17 season. At any rate, the new season is likely to being on the 1st Friday in October, which would be October 7. But they're not likely to play either the New York Rangers (a.k.a. The Scum), the New York Islanders or the Philadelphia Flyers (a.k.a. The Philth) in the opener.

Days until the next East Brunswick-Old Bridge Thanksgiving game: 
251, on Thursday morning, November 24, at the purple shit pit on Route 9. Under 8 months.

Days until Alex Rodriguez' alleged retirement becomes official: 592, as his contract runs out on October 31, 2017. Or at the conclusion of the 2017 World Series, if the Yankees make it. Whichever comes last. Under 20 months.

Days until the 2018 World Cup kicks off in Russia: 816, on June 14, 2018. A little over 26 months.

How to Be a Yankee Fan In Toronto -- 2016 Edition

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For this coming Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, the Yankees travel across the border to play away to the Toronto Blue Jays.

A lot of people predicted that those pesky Blue Jays would make the Playoffs, win the American League Eastern Division, or even win the AL Pennant in 2014. As it turned out, they weren't so much delusional as premature: The Jays did win the East last year, their 1st postseason berth of any kind in 22 years. They had been, following the Kansas City Royals' winning of the Pennant the previous October, the Major League Baseball team with the longest postseason drought.

(That distinction now belongs to the Seattle Mariners, who last made it 15 years ago. With the Royals and Jays having erased their droughts, now all 30 MLB teams, including the Washington Nationals with their move from being the Montreal Expos, have made the postseason at least once in the 21st Century.)

Why do I so frequently call them "those pesky Blue Jays"? Because it was the Blue Jays, then a 2-year-old expansion team, that the Yankees faced in the first Major League Baseball game I ever saw live, on May 27, 1978. The Yankees, defending World Champions, took a 1-1 tie into the 9th, but Ed Figueroa ran out of gas and lost, 4-1. (Why Billy Martin didn't put in Sparky Lyle, I don't know. I do know he didn't trust the new reliever, Goose Gossage, though Bob Lemon did, and that helped save the season.)

It took 4 games, over a span of 15 years, before I finally saw the Yankees beat the Blue Jays with me in the stadium. I used to keep records of this sort of thing, and I could probably rebuild it if I had the time, but think my record against the Jays is 2-5 -- and that includes 2 losses in Toronto. Which is a long way to go to not come away with a win.

Being in a foreign country has its particular challenges -- and, yes, for all its similarities to America, Canada is still a foreign country.

Before You Go. Make sure you call your bank and tell them you’re going. After all, Canada may be an English-speaking country, and a democracy (if a parliamentary one), and a country with a Major League Baseball team, but it is still a foreign country. If your bank gets a record of your ATM card making a withdrawal from any country other than the U.S., it may freeze the card, and any other accounts you may have with them. So be sure to let them know that you will, in fact, be in Canada for a little while.

And, since June 1, 2009, you need a passport to cross the border in either direction. Even if you have a valid driver’s license (or other State-issued ID) and your birth certificate, they ain’t lettin’ you across into the True North Strong and Free. Not even if you’re a Blue Jays season-ticket holder living in Buffalo or if you sing hosannas of praise to Wayne Gretzky. You don’t have a passport? Get one. You do have one? Make sure it’s valid and up to date. This is not something you want to mess with. Canadian Customs officials do not fuck around: They care about their national security, too.

Do yourself another big favor: Change your money before you go. There are plenty of currency exchanges in New York City, including one on 42nd Street between 7th and 8th Avenue.

Leave yourself $50 in U.S. cash, especially if you’re going other than by plane, so you’ll have usable cash when you get back to your side of the border. At last check, on the afternoon of April 7, 2016, US$1.00 = C$1.31 – or, C$1.00 = US 76 cents. However, since the currency exchanges need to make a profit, the current rate may actually favor Canada.  (I was actually in Canada on the day when it most favored the U.S.: January 18, 2002, $1.60 to $1.00 in our favor.)

The multi-colored bill were confusing on my first visit, although we have those now, too. The $5 is blue, and features Wilfrid Laurier (Prime Minister 1896-1911). The $10 is purple, and features John A. Macdonald (the 1st Prime Minister, 1867-1873 and again 1878-1891, essentially he’s their George Washington without having fought a war for independence). The $20 is green, and features the nation’s head of state, Britain’s Queen Elizabeth II. The $50 is red, and features William Lyon Mackenzie King (the longest-serving Prime Minister, 1921-1926, 1926-1930, 1935-1948, including World War II). And the $100 is yellow, and features Robert Borden (Prime Minister 1911-1920, including World War I).

The tricky part is going to be the coins – and you’ll thank me for telling you this, but keep your U.S. coins and your Canadian coins separate, for the simple reason that their penny, nickel, dime and quarter are all the same colors and just about the same size as our respective coins. (To make matters more confusing, as we recently did with our States, they had a Provincial quarter series.)

All coins have Queen Elizabeth’s portrait on the front, but she’s been Queen since 1952, and depending on how old the coin is, you might get a young woman, or her current 87-year-old self, or anything in between. You might even get a penny or a nickel old enough to feature her father, King George VI. Such a coin is still legal tender, however.

They have a $1 coin, copper-colored, bigger than a quarter, and 11-sided, with a bird on the back. This bird is a loon – not to be confused with the people lunatic enough to buy Maple Leafs season tickets. The coin is thus called the “loonie,” although they don’t say “ten loonies”: They use “buck” for “dollar” the way we would.  In fact, the term is connected to Canada: Their first English settlers were the Hudson’s Bay Company, and they set the value of a dollar to the price of the pelt of a male beaver, the male of the species being called, as are those of a deer and a rabbit, a buck. (And the female, a doe.) The nation’s French-speakers (Francophones) use the French word for loon, and call it a “huard,” but since the Montreal Expos are gone, you probably won’t hear that term unless you’re a hockey fan and go to see the Rangers, Devils or Islanders in Montreal – or maybe Ottawa, which is on the Ontario-Quebec border and has a lot of French-first-speakers.

Then there’s the $2 coin, or “toonie.” It’s not just two dollars, it’s two-toned, and even two-piece. It’s got a copper center, with the Queen on the front and a polar bear on the back, and a nickel ring around it. This coin is about the size of the Eisenhower silver dollars we used to have. This is the coin that drives me bonkers when I’m up there.

My suggestion is that, when you first get your money changed before you begin your trip, ask for $1 coins but no $2 coins. It’s just simpler. I like Canada a lot, but their money, yikes, eh?

This is Canada, the Great White North, so, being April, it may still feel like winter, especially if the wind is blasting off Lake Ontario. In which case the Rogers Centre roof will be likely to be closed. So you should pack a winter jacket. If you're going from May onward, even in late September, it will probably be warm enough to not bring any jacket, but bring a light one just in case.

According to the Toronto Star website, temperatures will be in the low 40s in the afternoons and the low 30s at night, so expect the dome to be closed for all 3 games. But no rain or snow is expected.

Toronto is in the Eastern Time Zone, so you won't have to reset your watch or fiddle with your smartphone's clock.

Tickets. It used to be that getting tickets to any Blue Jays home game, not just Yankee games, was hard, because they were selling the SkyDome out, 50,000 per night. It peaked in their 2nd straight World Championship season of 1993, 50,098.

But the strike of 1994, and the decline of the team (the World Championship roster had already begun to be broken up to save money), was the beginning of the end. They fell to 20,209 in 2002, had an uptick back to 29,626 in 2008, but in 2010 they averaged 20,068, 5th-worst in baseball, 3rd in the AL and dead last in the AL East – and that counts games against the well-traveling, not-that-far-away Yankees and Red Sox, not to mention their closest opponents, the Cleveland Indians and Detroit Tigers.

The move of the Montreal Expos to Washington, making them Canada's only Major League Baseball team, didn’t seem to have affected attendance much: The increases in home attendance in 2005, ’06, ’07 and ’08 were mainly due to the Jays getting a little better (in 2006 they finished 2nd to the Yankees, the closest they came to postseason play since between 1993 and 2015), and they lost 6,500 fans per game in 2009 and lost another 3,000 in 2010.

The preseason hype of 2014 and the postseason run last year sold a lot of tickets, getting them up to
34,504, about 70 percent of capacity

Even with that increase, you should have no trouble getting tickets, and going to one of the many scalpers on and around the stadium grounds will be totally unnecessary – this is the Jays, not the Leafs, who haven’t played to an unsold seat since World War II. (Note that all ticket prices I’m mentioning in this post are in Canadian dollars, which means they're a bit less in U.S. dollars.)

Games against the Yankees are classified as "Premium Games," so they are a bit more expensive than usual. You can get Field Level Bases and 200 Level Bases for $60, 100 Level Outfield for $49, 200 Level Outfield for $40, and the entire upper deck, the 500 Level, is just $24. The 500 Level is really high up, but no worse than the upper decks at the old Yankee Stadium and Shea, and the first few rows shouldn't be all that bad.

Getting There. The best way is by plane. (Note that these prices, unlike the preceding, will be in U.S. dollars.) Air Canada runs flights out of Newark Liberty, John F. Kennedy and LaGuardia International Airport to Toronto's Lester Pearson International Airport (he was Prime Minister from 1963 to 1968 and won the Nobel Peace Prize), and the flight takes about an hour and a half. Book on Air Canada today, and you can get a round-trip flight for around $560. On an American carrier (including, but not necessarily, American Airlines), it will be much more expensive, and it won't be nonstop.

Greyhound runs 9 buses a day from Port Authority Bus Terminal to the Toronto Coach Terminal, at 610 Bay Street. (Countries in the British Commonwealth, including Canada, call a local bus a bus and an inter-city bus a “coach.”) The ride averages about 11 hours, and is $166 round-trip -- although an advance purchase can drop it to $84.  The TCT is big and clean, although a little confusing, as it seems to be two separate buildings. You shouldn’t have any difficulties with it. It's one block down Bay to Dundas Street, and turn left to get to the Dundas subway station.
Amtrak, however, runs just one train, the Maple Leaf, in each direction each day between New York and Toronto, in cooperation with Canada’s equivalent, VIA Rail. This train leaves Pennsylvania Station at 7:15 AM and arrives at Union Station at 7:42 PM, a trip of 12 hours and 22 minutes – 9:10 of it in America, 32 minutes of it at Customs (4:25 to 4:57 PM) and 2:45 of it in Canada. The return trip leaves Toronto at 8:20 AM, reaches the border at 10:22, and gets back to Penn Station at 9:50 PM.

So if you want to see, for example, this entire upcoming series), you would have to leave New York on a Monday morning and leave on a Friday morning, and spend 4 nights in a hotel.
So, while Toronto’s Union Station, at 65 Front Street West, is one of the world’s great rail terminals, and is the heart of the city (it's the centerpoint of the city's subway system, so it's not just in the heart of the city), taking Amtrak/VIA to Toronto is not particularly convenient. Especially since the Maple Leaf is one of Amtrak’s most popular routes, and it could sell out. If you still want to try it, it’s US$271 round-trip. That's a lot more than Greyhound.
If you’re driving, it’s 500 miles – well, 492 miles from Times Square to downtown Toronto. Get into New Jersey to Interstate 80, and take it all the way across the State. Shortly after crossing the Delaware River and entering Pennsylvania, take I-380, following the signs for Scranton, until reaching I-81. (If you’ve driven to a game of the Yankees’ Triple-A farm team, the Scranton/Wilkes-Barre Yankees, you already know this part.) Take I-81 north into New York State. (If you’ve driven to a game of the Mets’ Double-A farm team, the Binghamton Mets, you already know this part.) Continue on I-81 past Binghamton and to Syracuse, where you’ll get on the New York State Thruway, which, at this point, is I-90. Continue on the Thruway west, past Rochester, to Buffalo.

What happens next depends on where you cross the border. But first, let’s discuss what you should do when you're actually at the border. Because you need to take this seriously. Because Canadian Customs will.

You'll be asked your citizenship, and you'll have to show your passport and your photo ID. You'll be asked why you're visiting Canada. Seeing a Yankees vs. Blue Jays game probably won't (but might) get you a smart-aleck remark about how the Jays are going to win, but they won't keep you out of their country based on that alone.

If you're bringing a computer with you (counting a laptop, but probably not counting a smartphone), you don't have to mention it, but you probably should. Chances are, you won't be carrying a large amount of food or plants; if you were, depending on how much, you might have to declare them.

Chances are, you won't be bringing alcohol into the country, but you can bring in one of the following items duty-free, and anything above or in addition to this must have duty paid on it: 1.5 litres (53 ounces) of wine, or 8.5 litres (300 ounces or 9.375 quarts) of beer or ale, or 1.14 litres (40 ounces) of hard liquor. If you have the slightest suspicion that I'm getting any of these numbers wrong, check the Canada Customs website. Better yet, don't bring booze in. Or out.

As for tobacco, well, you shouldn't use it. But, either way over the border, you can bring up to 200 cigarettes, 50 cigars, and 200 grams (7 ounces) of manufactured tobacco. As for Cuban cigars, last year, President Obama relaxed the embargo: Now, travelers may return to the United States with up to US$100 worth of alcohol or tobacco or a combination of both. Products acquired in Cuba may be in accompanied baggage, for personal use only. 

If you've got anything in your car (or, if going by bus or train) that could be considered a weapon, even if it's a disposable razor or nail clippers, tell them. And while Canada does have laws that allow you to bring in firearms if you're a licensed hunter (you'd have to apply for a license to the Province where you plan to hunt), the country has the proper attitude concerning guns: They hate them. They go absolutely batshit insane if you try to bring a firearm into their country. Which, if you're sane, is actually the sane way to treat the issue.

You think I'm being ridiculous? How about this: Seven of the 44 U.S. Presidents -- 9 counting the Roosevelts, Theodore after he was President and Franklin right before -- have faced assassins with guns, 6 got hit and 4 died; but none of the 23 people (including 1 woman) to serve as Prime Minister of Canada has ever faced an assassination attempt. John Lennon recorded "Give Peace a Chance" in Montreal and gave his first "solo concert" in Toronto, but he got shot and killed in New York. In fact, the next time I visit, I half-expect to see a bumper sticker that says, "GUNS DON'T KILL PEOPLE, AMERICANS WITH GUNS KILL PEOPLE."

(Another note about weapons: I’m a fan of the TV show NCIS, which airs in Canada on Global Network TV. If you are also a fan of this show, and you usually observe Gibbs Rule Number 9, "Never go anywhere without a knife," you need to remember that these are rules for members of Gibbs' team, not for civilians. So, this time, forget the knife, and leave it at home. If you really think you're going to need it -- as a tool -- mention the knife to the border guard, and show it to him, and tell him you have it to use as a tool in case of emergency, and that you do not plan to use it as a weapon. Do not mention the words "Rule Number 9" or quote said rule, or else he'll observe his Rule Number 1: "Do not let this jackass into your country, eh?" And another thing: Border guards, and the Royal Canadian Mounted Police, most likely will observe a variation on Gibbs Rule Number 23: "Never mess with a Mountie's Tim Hortons coffee if you want to live.")

And if you can speak French, don't try to impress the Customs officials with it. Or the locals, for that matter. You're going into Ontario, not Quebec. (And even if you were going into Quebec, they're not going to be impressed by your ability to speak their first language.) A, People of French descent are a minority west of Quebec (although singers Alanis Morrissette and Avril Lavigne are both Franco-Ontarians); and, B, They can probably speak English, let alone French, and possibly another language or two, better than you can. If you try to speak French in Toronto, you won't sound like you're from Montreal, and you certainly won't sound like you're from Paris. You'll sound like a smartass. That's if you speak French well. If you don't, you'll sound like a damn fool.

When crossing back into the U.S., in addition to what you would have to declare on the way in (if you still have any of it), you would have to declare items you purchased and are carrying with you upon return, items you bought in duty-free shops or (if you flew) on the plane, and items you intend to sell or use in your business, including business merchandise that you took out of the United States on your trip. There are other things, but, since you're just going for baseball, they probably won't apply to you. Just in case, check the Canadian Customs website I linked to above.

Precisely where will you be crossing the border? It could be at the Peace Bridge, built to commemorate the U.S. and Canada having “the world’s longest undefended border,” from Buffalo into the Ontario city of Fort Erie.

After going through Customs, this would take you right onto the Queen Elizabeth Way (the QEW). After the Pennsylvania Turnpike, this was North America’s second superhighway, and was named not for the current Queen but for her mother, the wife of King George VI, the woman most people now under the age of 65 called the Queen Mother or the Queen Mum. (You know: Helena Bonham-Carter in The King's Speech.) This road will hug Lake Ontario and go through the Ontario cities of Niagara Falls, St. Catharines and Hamilton before turning north and then east toward Toronto. Toronto’s CN Tower is so tall that you may actually see it, across the lake, before you get to Hamilton.

The most common route from Buffalo to Toronto, however, is to go north on I-190, the Thruway’s Niagara Extension, to Niagara Falls. After you go through Customs, the road will become Ontario Provincial Highway 405, which eventually flows into the Queen Elizabeth Way.

At the edge of the "megacity" of Toronto (Montreal is also now a "megacity"), the QEW becomes the Frederick G. Gardiner Expressway.  ("Big Daddy" Gardiner was a major Toronto politician, and was responsible for getting it built.) The Gardiner does not have numbers on its exits.  If you're going for only one game, and are leaving Toronto right afterward (I don't recommend this this: Spend a day in the city), you'll take the Spadina Avenue exit to get to Rogers Centre.

If you make 3 rest stops – I would recommend at or near Scranton and Syracuse, and count Customs, where they will have a restroom and vending machines – and if you don’t do anything stupid at Customs, such as fail to produce your passport, or flash a weapon, or say you watch South Park (a show with a vendetta against Canada for some reason), or call Sidney Crosby a cheating, diving pansy (even though he is one) – the trip should take about 11 hours.

Though that could become 12, because Toronto traffic is every bit as bad as traffic in New York, Boston and Washington. As Canada native (Regina, Saskatchewan) Leslie Nielsen would say, I am serious, and don’t call me Shirley: Toronto traffic is awful.

Once In the City. Founded as York in 1793, it became the City of Toronto in 1834, the name coming from Taronto, a Native American name for the channel of water between Lake Simcoe and Lake Couchiching. There are 2.6 million people in the city, and 5.6 million in the metro area; in each case, making it larger than any in North America except New York, Los Angeles and Chicago -- unless you count Mexico to be part of "North America" instead of "Central America," in which case add Mexico City to those that are larger.

Since Canada is in the British Commonwealth, there are certain subtle differences. Every measurement will be in the metric system. Dates are written not as Month/Day/Year, as we do it, but as Day/Month/Year as in Britain and in Europe. So the series begins for us on "April 12, 2016" but for them on "12 April 2016."

They also follow British custom in writing time: A game starting at 7:07 PM would be listed as 1907. (Those of you who have served in the military, you will recognize this as, in the words of M*A*S*H's Lt. Col. Henry Blake, "all that hundred-hours stuff.") And every word we would end with -or, they will end with -our; and some (but not all) words that we would end with -er, they end with -re, as in "Rogers Centre."

Another thing to keep in mind: Don't ask anyone where the "bathroom" is -- ask for the "washroom." This difference was a particular pet peeve of mine the first time I arrived at the Toronto Coach Terminal, although it wasn't a problem in Montreal's Gare Centrale as I knew the signs would be in French.

Every measurement will be in the metric system: Temperatures will be in Celsius, not Fahrenheit; distances will be in "kilometres," not miles (including speed limits, so don't drive 100 thinking it's miles); and gas prices will be per "litre," not per gallon (so don't think you're getting cheap gas, because a liter is a little more than a quart, so multiply the price by 4, and you'll get roughly the price per gallon, and it will be more expensive than at home, not less).

When you arrive, I would recommend buying the Toronto Star and The Globe and Mail. The former newspaper is local, the latter is national, and both are liberal enough to suit my sensibilities (or, should I say, sensible enough to suit my liberalism). And The Star has a very good sports section, and should do a good job covering the Jays, although, being a hockey city in a hockey Province in a hockey country, you’ll see a lot of stuff about the Maple Leafs and nearby minor-league, collegiate and “junior” hockey teams no matter what time of year it is.

I would advise against buying the Toronto Sun, because it’s a right-wing sensationalist tabloid, and every bit the journalistically sloppy rag that the New York Post is. (It also has conservative “sister papers” called the Sun in Ottawa, Winnipeg, Edmonton and Calgary, although the Vancouver Sun is not connected.) The National Post, while also politically conservative (and thus a national competitor for The Globe and Mail), is a broadsheet and thus conservative in the sense that it is calmer and more sensible with its journalism.

If you can get to Union Station after leaving your hotel, you may also be able to get out-of-town papers, including the New York ones, as well as Canadian papers such as the Montreal Gazette and the Ottawa Citizen.

The drinking age in Ontario is 19. Toronto's sales tax is 13 percent -- in 2010, this replaced the former Provincial sales tax of 5 percent and the federal GST (Goods & Services Tax) of 8 percent. In other words, the Conservative Party government of Prime Minister Stephen Harper wanted Canadians to think he'd killed the hated GST, when, in fact, Ontarians (who only make up 36 percent of the country) are paying pretty much the same taxes that they did before. See how stupid it is to vote for conservative candidates? It doesn't work in any country.

Union Station is at the intersection of Bay & Front Streets. Bay runs north-south, and divides Toronto's east and west sides, and the street numberings thereof; the lake serves as the "zero point" for streets running north and south, and thus there's no North and South on street names. Bay Street is also Canada's "Wall Street," the center of Toronto's financial district, and is not particularly well-liked by, well, anybody who isn't conservative in Canada.

Toronto has a subway, Canada’s oldest, opened in 1954 and known as “the Rocket.” (I’ll bet Montrealers hated that, since it was the nickname of their beloved hockey star Maurice Richard, well before future Blue Jay and Yankee Roger Clemens was even born.) Along with Philadelphia, it's one of the last 2 subway systems in North America that still uses tokens rather than a farecard system such as New York's MetroCard.
They also have a streetcar system. Tokens can be used on both, and are C$3.25, (US$2.48, so it's actually cheaper than New York's), but are not sold individually. You must buy a minimum of 3, for C$8.10 (US$6.18), and the price per token goes down the more you buy. A Daypass is a much better value, at C$12.00 (US$9.16).
Going In. Originally known as the SkyDome, for its retractable roof, and opening in June 1989, the building was renamed the Rogers Centre in 2005, for the new corporate owner of the Jays, Rogers Communications, founded by the late Ted Rogers and featuring several cable-TV networks, most notably Rogers Sportsnet (although TSN, The Sports Network, ESPN's Canada version, is the more popular).
The official address is 1 Blue Jays Way. The stadium doesn't really have surrounding streets, unless you count Bremner Blvd. to the south, as there are buildings, parks and a railroad between. Parking is a whopping $40, so if you drove in, you're better off leaving your car in your hotel's parking deck.

If you're trying to get to Rogers Centre (under both names, they hate it when you use the definite article "the" in its name) from a downtown hotel, it is not going to be fun. The subway doesn’t go to the dome. The closest stop is the one for Union Station. And the city’s famed streetcars are no help, either. It’s a great city for public transportation, unless you’re going to Rogers Centre or the CN Tower, which are only the 2 biggest tourist attractions in the city, and right next-door to each other. (When SkyDome opened in 1989, somebody called them a sperm-and-egg pairing.) I’d say they’re the 2 biggest tourist attractions in the Province of Ontario, or even the entire country, but, as I said, you’ll have to pass Niagara Falls.

The stadium is, theoretically, just 3 blocks away from Union Station, down Front Street West: York, Simcoe, John. But it’s going to seem like a long walk. (Trust me, I’ve done it.) And Front Street West is perhaps the most touristy street in the entire country, much as Broadway in Midtown Manhattan is.

Most likely, you’ll be walking from Union Station along Front Street, or the Skywalk that connects the station to the CN Tower. Gates 2 and 3 are at the northeast corner, Gates 5 and 6 are on the east front, Gate 7 is at the southeast corner, Gates 9 and 9A are at the southwest corner, Gates 10 and 11 are on the west front, and Gates 13 and 14 are at the northwest corner.

There are, as yet, no statues outside the stadium dedicated to Blue Jays greats. But they do have some exterior sculptures depicting fans, which is nice. Even if the statues themselves are not all nice.

The hallways are carpeted. This makes the stadium feel more like a movie theater (or "theatre," as it would be "spelt" in Canada) than a sports stadium, especially if the roof is closed.  But the carpet that serves as the field is awful, about as bad as the one at Tropicana Field in Tampa Bay.

The field points north, but that doesn't make a difference, since you can't see outside the place anyway, unless you sit on the 3rd base side and the roof is open, in which case you can see the CN Tower.
The field is symmetrical: Outfield distances are 328 to the poles (exactly 100 "metres"), 375 to the alleys and 400 to "centre." While with the Red Sox in 2001, Manny Ramirez hit the dome's longest home run, 491 feet. This will be the last season that the field is artificial turf: They're going to natural grass next season, now that they no longer have to also host football. This will leave Tampa Bay as the only MLB team still playing on the plastic stuff.

With the Toronto Argonauts having moved out, the Jays no longer have to groundshare with anyone. This leaves the Oakland Coliseum as the only stadium shared by a Major League Baseball team and a professional football team. 
Rogers Centre hosted the Argos for 27 seasons, and has hosted 4 Grey Cups, the last in 2012, won by the Argos. It also hosted a few Buffalo Bills "home games," and the International Bowl, once won by Rutgers. With the new grass field coming in, the stands will be fixed in place, so, no more football. The NBA's Raptors played there from their 1995 debut until the 1999 opening of the Air Canada Centre.

Food. You know the economy is bad when a McDonald’s closes. And there was a McDonald’s in the SkyDome, the first in any stadium in the world, but it closed during the 2008-10 recession. The Hard Rock Café, the first in any stadium in the world, is also gone.

The stadium has standard baseball food, and although none of it is great, most of it upsets Canadian stomachs far less than do the Jays’ relief pitchers. There are several "HogTown Grill" stands -- Hogtown being an old nickname for Toronto, the rusticity of it belying its image as Canada's biggest city. Before the Indian (or, as they would say in Canada, instead of "Native American,""First Nations") name of Toronto was given to the city, the English called it "York" (not to be confused with New York), and "Muddy York Market" (presumably a fresh fruit stand) is behind 106, 110 and 514.  

12 Bar, named in honor of Roberto Alomar, is behind Section 215. Touch 'Em All Joe Bar, obviously named for Joe Carter and his 1993 walkoff, is at 232.

Although Toronto is not as known for Jewish culture and food as much as Montreal is, a Kosher stand called Olde Spadina Avenue is at 132, and Shopsy's Deli is at 124.

In spite of Canada being in the opposite direction, Rogers Centre nods toward Mexico and the Caribbean with the Big Smoke Jerk Chicken Nacho: Crisp corn tortilla chips topped with cheddar cheese sauce, smoked jerk chicken, pico de gallo, scallions, country slaw, and jerk infused sour cream. (Jerk-infused? Another tribute to Alomar, a.k.a. Ol' Spithead?) This item is also available as a sandwich.

There is an ice cream shop at 137. And what would a Canadian gathering place be without a Tim Hortons, or two? Rogers Centre has 'em at 114 and 128.

The "Great Canadian" -- not to be confused with Wayne "The Great One" Gretzky, whose restaurant is across the street from Rogers Centre -- is a hot dog topped with maple baked beans, crumbled Canadian back bacon, caramelized sweet red onions and Canadian cheddar cheese. I would advise against trying it. If you do, you'll be glad Canada has socialized medicine.

The Jays also serve poutine, the French fries, gravy and curd concoction that almost single-handedly undoes all the good that Quebec culture has done for the world. The Jays' take on it includes chicken wings on the bottom, loaded not just with everything else that comes with poutine, but pretty much anything you've ever seen put on a baked potato. Apparently, the Blue Jays' motto is, "If you can't beat 'em, kill 'em by clogging their arteries."

There is also something called "Bread Bottoms" behind 109. I have no idea what this refers to; on my 2005 and '06 visits, I did not notice it, so it may have been added since. Hopefully, it's nothing worse than a bakery stand.

Team History Displays. The Jays have championship banners in straightaway center field. (Or “centre field.”) They no longer have separate banners for their World Series wins, Pennants and American League Eastern Division Championships of 1992 and 1993, only for the World Series wins. They also have banners for their AL East titles of 1985, 1989, 1991 and 2015, and for the 1991 All-Star Game which they hosted.

The Jays retired a uniform number for the first time in 2011, when they had their first player elected to the Baseball Hall of Fame: Roberto Alomar -- Number 12, 2nd base, 1991-95. They've given similar treatment to Hall-of-Famer Pat Gillick, the team's general manager from its inception in 1977 until 1995. Pat's and Robbie's banners flank the championship banners.
Their main display of player honors is a “Level of Excellence,” between the 300 and 400 Levels (club seats). In addition to Alomar and Gillick, it honors the following: Paul Beeston, executive, 1976-present and chief operating officer 1989-2015; Tom Cheek, broadcaster, 1977-2005, his “number” being the number of consecutive games he broadcast until illness ended his streak at 4,306, soon ending his life as well; Dave Stieb, Number 37, pitcher, 1979-92 with a brief comeback in 1998; George Bell, Number 11, left field, 1981-90; Tony Fernandez, Number 1, shortstop, 1983-90, 1993, 1998-99 and 2001; Cito Gaston, Number 43, manager, 1989-97 and 2008-10; Joe Carter, Number 29, 1st base-right field, 1991-97; and Carlos Delgado, Number 25, 1st base 1993-2004. And, of course, Jackie Robinson's Number 42 is retired for all of baseball, including the Jays, so no Toronto ballplayer will ever wear it again.
The Level of Excellence previously featured the All-Time Team of the Canadian Football League’s most successful franchise, the 16-time Grey Cup winners, the Toronto Argonauts, including their 4 retired numbers: Joe Krol, Number 55, quarterback, 1945-52 and ’55; Dick Shatto, Number 22, running back, 1954-65; Danny Nykoluk, Number 60, offensive tackle, 1955-71; and Michael “Pinball” Clemons, Number 31, running back 1989-2000, since 2001 a team administrator, and, by a weird twist, comes from Dunedin, Florida, the only spring-training home the Blue Jays have ever had.

Aside from Dave Winfield, with the team for just 1 season (but a World Championship season), no Blue Jays were named to The Sporting News' 100 Greatest Players in 1999. If TSN were to do it again, none would be added, not even Alomar or Roy Halladay.

There is no mention at Rogers Centre of the 10 Pennants won by the Jays’ minor-league predecessor, the Toronto Maple Leafs, for whom the legendary hockey team was named: 1887 (in the original Eastern League, the rest in the International League), 1902, 1912, 1917, 1918, 1926, 1934, 1960, 1965 and 1966. Those last 3 came as a farm club of the Boston Red Sox, with the 1960 Pennant featuring Carl Yastrzemski, and the last 2 being managed by Dick Williams, who was promoted to the big club and took some of his Leafs with him and, with Yaz and Jim Lonborg and a few others, those ex-Leafs forged the “Impossible Dream” Pennant of 1967.

However, 1967 was also the last year of the franchise, as they were moved by the Sox. It would be 1991 before Toronto got full revenge on the Red Sox for taking their old team away, edging them for the AL East title in the first race where both of them went down to the wire.

A statue of Ted Rogers, Rogers Communications titan and Jays owner from 2000 until his death in 2008 (and thus responsible for neither the team's establishment, nor the stadium's construction, nor the team's current success) stands outside. When the 2016-17 season starts, there will be 3 major league sports venues in Canada with his name on them: The Rogers Centre in Toronto, the Rogers Arena in Vancouver (home of the NHL's Canucks), and Rogers Place in Edmonton (soon to be home of the NHL's Oilers).
Stuff. The usual types of memorabilia are sold, including jerseys with the names of current Jays players on them. For those of former Jays stars, such as those on the Level of Excellence, sorry, but you’ll have to go to Mitchell & Ness in Philadelphia (or their website) to get them.

At least you won’t have to look at those blue Js. When the Jays were heading into the 1992 postseason, somebody remembered the previous season’s World Series, when the Minnesota Twins brought back the Homer Hankies of 1987, and the Atlanta Braves made the foam tomahawks to do the Tomahawk Chop. So someone made up about a million big bright blue foam objects in the shape of the letter J. A “blue J.” Get it, eh? (Not to be outdone, when the Jays played the Chicago White Sox in the 1993 ALCS, white socks were given to Chicago fans to wave around. As far as I know, the Red Sox have never given people red socks to wave around.) The blue Js were still better than the foam headgear I once saw, resembling the bird on the team’s then-logo. That looked really ridiculous.

There aren't many good books about the Jays. Nate LeBoutillier (ironically, a French-Canadian) wrote the recently-published, but unimaginatively-titled, The Story of the Toronto Blue Jays.  
On May 1, The Big 50: Toronto Blue Jays: The Men and Moments that Made the Toronto Blue Jays by Shi Davidi and Dan Shulman will be published.

The Jays are also weak on video. The official World Series highlight films of 1992 and 1993 are available on DVD, but if you’re looking for The Essential Games of the Toronto Blue Jays, or The Essential Games of Rogers Centre, you’re out of luck. They do, however, have Game 6 of the '93 Series available as part of the official MLB series Baseball's Greatest Games.

I suspect next year's 40th Anniversary of the club will result in more commemorative books and videos, regardless of what they do in the 2016 season.

During the Game. A recent Thrillist article placed the Blue Jays' fans at 28th on the list of "most intolerable fans" -- making them the 3rd most tolerable. For the most part, this is accurate: You do not need to fear wearing your Yankee gear to Rogers Centre. Although quite a few U.S.-based crime dramas (and other shows, and films, particularly those that supposedly take place in Chicago) have been filmed in and around Toronto, it's not a particularly crime-ridden city.

You might get some verbal from the Jays fans, especially after a Jays win over the Yanks, but this will mainly consist of them yelling, "Yankees suck!" And you’ve heard that before, and you know how to respond: "Five rings since '93, what have you done since then?" (Answer: "We're defending AL East Champions!" Rebuttal: "Yeah: One Division title in twenty-three years.")

None of these Yanks-Jays game will feature a promotion. If it's a day game and it's warm, no threat of rain, and there's no wind, most likely the roof will be open. If it's a night game, or a day game but rainy and/or windy, or not especially warm, the roof will probably be closed. The ball travels farther with the roof closed (this is usually the case with domed stadiums, though the first, Houston's Astrodome, was a pitcher's park), but with a large amount of foul territory, the Rogers Centre is generally regarded as a pitchers' park.

Since you’re in Canada, there will be two National Anthems sung. "The Star-Spangled Banner" will probably be sung by about half of the few thousand Yankee Fans who show up, but "O Canada" will be sung by the home fans with considerable gusto. When I’m at a sporting event where the opposing team is Canadian, I like to sing "O Canada" in French. Montreal Canadiens fans like this when I do it at the Prudential Center. Fans of the other Canadian NHL teams just think it’s weird. When I did it in the 2 games I’ve been to at Rogers Centre, the Jays fans, as I warned they would, simply thought I was a twat. But then, they root for the Jays, and I root for the Yanks, so I’d rather have their opinion of me than my opinion of them. At any rate, the Jays hold auditions for Anthem singers, instead of having a regular.

The Jays' mascot is a blue jay named Ace. From 1979 to 1999, they had a blue jay mascot named B.J. Birdie. B.J. resembled the logo the Jays had at the time, while Ace resembles the one they’ve had since the 2004 season. From 2000 to 2003, Ace had a girlfriend, named Diamond – baseball or otherwise, "diamonds are a girl's best friend," get it? But they must have broken up, because Ace has been alone since 2004.

At the 7th inning stretch, after they sing "Take Me Out to the Ballgame," they go into "OK Blue Jays." It was written by Jack Lenz and Tony Kosinec, and the recorded version is by Keith Hampshire & the Bat Boys. They’ve used this song since 1983, and it is certified as a gold record in Canada. (That's 50,000 copies, as opposed to the 500,000 you need to sell to get a gold record in the U.S.) It's a very stupid song, but then, so are most baseball-themed songs. It's not like "Here Come the Yankees" is appreciably better.

On occasion, the Jays will wear throwback uniforms at home – but these will be their original road uniforms of the Exhibition Stadium era, 1977 to 1989. And they will be powder blue. There’s a reason why teams stopped wearing that color: It is not particularly athletic-looking! Except maybe at the University of North Carolina.

If the roof is closed, fireworks will shoot out from it following a Jays homer or a Jays win. That’s right, indoor fireworks. But the peak of the roof is high enough that you should not be in danger.

After the Game. As I said, Blue Jays fans may try to take a few liberties, especially if their team has beaten the Yankees. Toronto is an international city, every bit as much as New York is, and some of these people may have cut their teeth as sports fans in European soccer. But we’re not talking about hooligans here. And, of course, you can just bring up the 27 rings, or the 5 the Yankees have won since Joe Carter touched ‘em all 23 years ago. Wow, that means a 30-year-old living in Toronto may have no memory of it. Beats being 55 and having no memory of the Leafs winning the Cup, though.

The official address for the Rogers Centre is 1 Blue Jays Way, which is the street outside the left field corner, which flows into Peter Street. At 99 Blue Jays Way is Wayne Gretzky’s Restaurant. But since he betrayed his former fellow players and sided with his current fellow owners in the 2004-05 NHL lockout, I consider him a traitor to the game of hockey, and I will not set foot in his establishment, and I would advise you to avoid it as well.

I would also advise avoiding Jack Astor’s, a smart-alecky-named chain of Canadian restaurants that includes one at 144 Front Street West, about halfway between Union Station and the Rogers Centre. I ate there the last time I was in Toronto, and the food and service would be mediocre at half the price. They have only one location in the U.S. -- not surprisingly, in nearby Buffalo, at the Walden Galleria east of downtown.

There’s the Canadian Bar & Grill, at the Hyatt Regency at 370 King Street West, 4 blocks from Rogers Centre.  It features what it calls "traditional Canadian cuisine." This includes wild game, as well as regional items like poutine and Newfoundland clam chowder. (Apparently, the word "chowder" came from the Newfies, and theirs is closer to New England's than to the tomato-based abomination known as Manhattan clam chowder. Clam chowder is one of the few things New England does better, a lot better, than New York.)

If rabbit stew isn’t your cup of tea, try the Loose Moose Tap & Grill, at 146 Front Street West, 2 blocks from the stadium. There, as they say, you’ll "eat like a king then party like a rock star!" You’ll be dining like a typical Torontonian, rather than with guys likely to jump into the Monty Python "Lumberjack Song." (If you've never seen that sketch, let me put it this way: Don't ask, and I won't tell.) And the Lone Star Texas Grill, a block away at 200 Front Street West, is jointly owned by several former CFL players, and is a fair takeoff on the U.S. chain Lone Star Steakhouse.

Actually, your best bet may be, as Vancouver native Cobie Smulders of the TV series How I Met Your Mother would put it, "the most Canadian place there is": Tim Hortons. (Note that there is no apostrophe: It’s "Hortons," not "Horton's," because Quebec's ridiculous protect-the-French-language law prohibits apostrophes and the company wanted to keep the same national identity.) They have a 62 percent share of the Canadian coffee market (Starbucks has just 7 percent) and 76 percent of the Canadian baked goods market. They also sell sandwiches, soup, chili, and even (some of you will perk up faster than if you’d drunk their coffee) New York-style cheesecake. It’s fast food, but good food. I rate them behind Dunkin Donuts, but ahead of Starbucks.

Tim Horton, a defenceman (that’s how they spell it up there) for the Maple Leafs, and businessman Ron Joyce started the doughnut/coffee shop chain in 1964, while in the middle of the Maple Leafs' 1960s dynasty. He played a couple of years for the Rangers, then went to the Buffalo Sabres and opened a few outlets in the Buffalo area. He was still playing at age 44, and the only thing that stopped him was death. Specifically, a 100-MPH, not-wearing-a-seat-belt crash on the Queen Elizabeth Way over Twelve Mile Creek in St. Catharines, Ontario. (In other words, if you’re driving or taking the bus from New York to Toronto, you’ll pass the location.)

Joyce, whose son Ron Jr. married Horton’s daughter Jeri-Lyn, joined with Dave Thomas of Wendy’s and merged the two companies in 1995, becoming its largest shareholder, with even more shares than Thomas. Although the companies have since split again, it was mutually beneficial, as Wendy's gained in Canada and Timmy's poked their heads in the U.S. door. There are now over 3,000 Tim Hortons locations in Canada (including one at Toronto's Union Station and several on Canadian Forces Bases around the world) and over 500 in the U.S. – and they’re heavily expanding in New York, including 3 in the Penn Station complex alone (despite Horton himself only briefly having played for the Rangers upstairs at the "new" Madison Square Garden). They are also partnered with Cold Stone Creamery, with an outlet on 42nd Street, a 2-minute walk from Port Authority. These Hosers know what they're doing.

The only reference I can find to a bar or restaurant in Toronto where New Yorkers are known to gather is the Sports Centre Café, at 49 St. Clair Avenue West, off Yonge Street. It has lots of screens, and, supposedly, local Giants fans watch NFL games there. I know, that's a bit vague, but it may be your best shot. St. Clair stop on the subway.

Sidelights. Being the largest and most influential city in Canada, Toronto is loaded with tourist traps. This has been spoofed in "The Toronto Song," a bit by the Edmonton-based comedy trio Three Dead Trolls in a Baggie. (It's often cited incorrectly including by myself in previous editions of this piece, as being by the Arrogant Worms. It’s not obvious that 3DTB are from Edmonton until the end of the song, by which point they've said everything in Ontario sucks, as do all the other Provinces, except, "Alberta doesn't suck – but Calgary does.")

They're not far off.  Toronto is much cleaner than most American cities: U.S. film crews, trying to save money by filming there, have had to throw garbage onto the streets so it would look more like New York, Boston, Chicago or Los Angeles, and then they have to do it again between takes, because the street-sweepers clean it up that quickly.  But the city does have slums, a serious homeless problem, ridiculous rents, never-ending lakefront high-rise construction (mirroring Mayor Mike Bloomberg’s similar projects in New York), and their share of metalheads, punks, Goths and chavs.

I wouldn't call now-long-parted Mayor David Miller a dork, as 3DTB did, although his predecessor, Mel Lastman, was often a Canadian version of Rudy Giuliani. With better hair. You may have heard about recent Mayor Rob Ford: He's a crook, an alcoholic and a crackhead, who was just barely able, through legal action, to keep his office. Alas, cancer prevented him from running for re-election, and he recently died. The new Mayor is John Tory.

Torontonians can’t quite decide whether they want to be Canada’s New York (national media, culture and finance capital, home of the CBC and CTV, and Bay Street is their "Wall Street"), Canada's Chicago (a gritty blue-collar "drinking town with a sports problem"), or Canada’s L.A. (movie-filming center.) Actually, Montreal is Canada's New York, Hamilton its Chicago, and Vancouver its L.A.

Toronto is... Toronto is something else. Scientists have yet to figure out what. But check out these locations:

* Hockey Hall of Fame, 30 Yonge Street, blocked by Yonge, Front, Bay and Wellington. If you go to Toronto and you don’t go to the Hockey Hall of Fame, they should deport you from Canada and never let you back in. This place is great, and the actual Stanley Cup is there. Well, 2 of them are, the original bowl that was so damaged that they replaced it in 1970, plus some of the bands with old-time winners on it, and a display copy. The one that gets awarded every year is also stored there in preparation for its annual awarding, then gets to go wherever the winning team’s players want to take it for almost a year.

You’ll also see why Canadians call hockey jerseys "sweaters": They used to be sweaters, as you’ll see in the display cases. You’ll also see why they’re not sweaters anymore: Holes where they were eaten by moths. Hockey eventually got that right.

They also got the location for their Hall of Fame right: While it’s not clear where hockey was invented, and the NHL was founded in Montreal, they put their Hall of Fame in an easily accessible city, unlike baseball (hard-to-reach Cooperstown, New York is NOT where baseball was invented), basketball (Springfield, Massachusetts is where it was invented but it’s a depressing town), and pro football (Canton, Ohio is where the NFL was founded but it's so drab and bleak it makes Springfield look like Disney World… Sorry, Thurman). Union Station stop on the TTC subway.

* Exhibition Place. The Canadian National Exhibition is kind of a nationwide “State Fair.” It was on the grounds, off Princes Boulevard, that Exhibition Stadium, or the Big X, stood from 1948 to 1999. It was home to the Blue Jays from 1977 to 1989 and the CFL’s Argonauts from 1959 to 1988. It hosted only one MLB postseason series, the 1985 ALCS, which the Jays lost to the Kansas City Royals.
It hosted 12 Grey Cups (Canadian Super Bowls), although only one featured the Argos, and that was the 1982 game, won by the Edmonton Eskimos in a freezing rain, with fans chanting, "We want a dome!" The SkyDome/Rogers Centre project soon began, and Exhibition Stadium never hosted another Grey Cup. Rogers Centre has now hosted 4, including the 100th, in November 2012, which the Argos won over the Calgary Stampeders.

BMO Field (pronounced "BEE-moh"), home of Canada’s Sports Hall of Fame and Major League Soccer’s rather unimaginatively-named Toronto FC, was built on the site of Exhibition Stadium. It hosted the 2010 MLS Cup Final. The Argos will begin play there this summer. Exhibition stop on the Lakeshore West line of GO, Toronto’s commuter-rail service out of Union Station.

* Varsity Stadium, 299 Bloor Street West and Devonshire Place. The home of the athletic complex of the University of Toronto, this is the 3rd stadium on the site, replacing one that stood from 1911 to 2002 and the one before that from 1898 to 1911. It only seats 5,000, but its predecessor could hold 21,739, and hosted more Grey Cups than any other facility, 29, from 1911 to 1957.

Unlike Exhibition Stadium, the Argos won 9 of their 16 Grey Cups at home at Varsity Stadium: 1914, 1921, 1937, 1938, 1945, 1946, 1947, 1950 and 1952. (They also won at Sarnia in 1933, Vancouver in 1983, Winnipeg in 1991, Hamilton in 1996, Edmonton in 1997 and Ottawa in 2004.)

Varsity Stadium was home to the various Toronto teams in the North American Soccer League, and hosted the 1969 Rock ‘n Roll Revival Concert, as shown in the film Sweet Toronto, featuring John Lennon and his Plastic Ono Band (of course, with Yoko Ono, but also with Eric Clapton), the Doors, Alice Cooper, and founding fathers of rock Chuck Berry, Bo Diddley, Little Richard, Jerry Lee Lewis and Gene Vincent. This was the concert where a live chicken was thrown at Cooper from the seats, and he threw it back, thinking it could fly, but it died. Museum stop on the Yonge-University Line, or St. George stop on the Yonge-University or Bloor-Danforth Lines.

* Rosedale Park, Scholfield and Highland Avenues. This is where the first Grey Cup game was held, on December 4, 1909. The University of Toronto defeated the Toronto Parkdale Canoe Club, 26-6. There’s now a soccer field on the site of the original stadium.

Unfortunately, the closest subway stop is Summerhill, on the Yonge-University Line, and you’ll have to walk a roundabout path to get there. If you really want to see it, you may want to take a cab.

* Maple Leaf Gardens, 60 Carlton Street, at Church Street. Home of the NHL’s Toronto Maple Leafs from 1931 to 1999, this was arguably the most famous building in Canada. The Leafs won 11 Stanley Cups while playing here: 1932, 1942, 1945, 1947, 1948, 1949, 1951, 1962, 1963, 1964 and 1967 – and they haven’t been back to the Finals since.

The Gardens (always plural, never “The Garden” like in New York and Boston) also hosted the first NHL All-Star Game, a benefit for injured Leafs star Ace Bailey in 1934, one of the Canada-Soviet “Summit Series” games in 1972, and the first Canada Cup in 1976, where Leafs star Darryl Sittler stole the show.

On November 1, 1946 -- we're coming up on the 70th Anniversary -- the 1st NBA game was held at the Gardens, with the New York Knicks beating the Toronto Huskies, who folded after that first season of 1946-47. It hosted the Beatles on all 3 of their North American tours (1964, ’65 and ’66), and Elvis Presley in 1957 – oddly, in his early period, not in his Vegas-spectacle era.

But somebody who doesn't give a damn about history, only money, decided the Gardens was obsolete, and the Leafs moved into the Air Canada Centre in 1999.  A plan to turn the arena into a shopping mall and movie multiplex, as was done with the Montreal Forum, was dropped because of the way the building was built: Unlike the Forum, if the Gardens' upper deck of seats was removed, the walls would collapse.

Fortunately, it has been renovated, and is now part of the athletic complex of Ryerson University, including its hockey team, with its seating capacity reduced to 2,796 seats, down from its classic capacity which ranged from 12,473 in the beginning to 15,726 at the end, with a peak of 16,316 in the 1970s. So, while the old Madison Square Garden, the old Boston Garden, Chicago Stadium, and the Olympia are gone, and the Montreal Forum has been converted into a mall, one of the "Original Six" arenas is still standing and being used for hockey. It also has a Loblaws supermarket. College stop, on the Yonge-University Line.

* Mutual Street Arena, bounded by Mutual, Shuter, Dundas and Dalhousie Streets. This arena stood at this location from 1912 until 1989, when condos were built there, and was the home of the Toronto Blueshirts, National Hockey Association Champions and Stanley Cup winners 1914, and the Maple Leafs from 1917 to 1931.

The Leafs were known as the Toronto Arenas when they won the first NHL Championship and their first Stanley Cup in 1918, and the Toronto St. Patricks when the won the Cup in 1922. Conn Smythe renamed them the Maple Leafs, after the city’s minor-league baseball team, when he bought them in 1927. Queen or Dundas stops on the Yonge-University Line.

* Air Canada Centre, 40 Bay Street. "The Hangar," the home of the Maple Leafs and the NBA’s Toronto Raptors since 1999 (the Raptors played at the SkyDome 1995 to 1999, with a few games at Maple Leaf Gardens), it is a modern, 18,800-seat facility with all the amenities, built between Union Station and the Gardiner Expressway. Union Station stops on the Yonge-University Line and the GO and VIA Rail systems.

* Hanlan’s Point. This was the home of Toronto baseball teams from 1897 to 1925, and was the site of Babe Ruth's 1st professional game, on April 22, 1914, for the Providence Grays, then affiliated with the Red Sox, much as their modern counterparts the Pawtucket Red Sox are. The Grays played the baseball version of the Maple Leafs, and the Babe pitched a one-hitter and homered in a 9-0 Providence win.

Unfortunately, Hanlan’s Point is on one of the Toronto Islands, in Lake Ontario off downtown. The stadium is long gone, and the location is only reachable by Ferry.

* Maple Leaf Stadium, at Stadium Road (formerly an extension of Bathurst Street) and Queens Quay West (that’s pronounced "Queen’s Key"). Home to the baseball Maple Leafs from 1926 to 1967, it was demolished a year later, with apartments built on the site.

The Leafs won 5 International League Pennants here, and it was the first sports team owned by Jack Kent Cooke, who would later own the NBA's Los Angeles Lakers, the NHL's Los Angeles Kings, and the NFL's Washington Redskins. Take the 509 Streetcar from Union Station to Queens Quay West at Dan Leckie Way.

* Fort York, Bathurst Street and Front Street West. You should see at least one place that doesn't have anything to do with sports. In the War of 1812, this place has become more interesting. In that war, the 2nd and last time the U.S. seriously tried to take Canada away from the British Empire, the U.S. Army, led by Zebulon Pike (for whom the Colorado Peak was named), burned the fort and what was then the city of York, now Toronto, on April 27, 1813. However, Pike was killed in the battle. In revenge, the British burned Washington, D.C. 

509 Streetcar to Fleet Street at Bastion Street. Essentially, Fort York is Canada’s Alamo. (But not their Gettysburg: That would be Lundy’s Lane, in Niagara Falls, and I recommend that you make time for that as well.)

* Royal Ontario Museum, 100 Queens Park at Bloor Street West. "The ROM" is at the northern edge of Queen's Park, which includes the Ontario provincial Parliament complex and the University of Toronto, and is, essentially, next-door to Varsity Stadium. It is Canada’s answer to New York's Museum of Natural History. Museum stop on the Yonge-University Line, or St. George stop on the Yonge-University or Bloor-Danforth Lines.

* CN Tower, 301 Front Street West at John Street. It rises 1,815 feet above the ground, but with only its central elevator shaft and its 1,122-foot-high observation deck habitable, the Council on Tall Buildings and Urban Habitat (CTBUH) ruled that it was never a candidate for the title of "the world's tallest building." From 1975 until Burj Khalifa opened in Dubai in 2007, it was officially listed as "the world's tallest freestanding structure." The CN stood for Canadian National railways, but with their bankruptcy and takeover by VIA Rail, the CN now stands for Canada's National Tower.

Like the Empire State Building, at night it is lit in colors (or "colours") for special occasions, with its standard colors being the national colors, red and white. Admission is C$44.00 -- US$33.59, making it even more expensive than the Empire State Building's $27.00. It's next-door to the Rogers Centre and accessible via a skywalk from Union Station.

Toronto has quite a few very tall actual "buildings." First Canadian Place has been the nation's tallest building since it opened in 1975, 978 feet high, northwest corner of King & Bay Streets.  There are 7 other buildings in excess of 700 feet, including, sadly, one built by Donald Trump and named for himself.

Being outside the U.S., there are no Presidential Libraries in Canada.  The nation's Prime Ministers usually don't have that kind of equivalent building. Of Canada's 23 Prime Ministers, 15 are dead, but only one is buried in Toronto: William Lyon Mackenzie King, who led the government off and on from 1926 to 1950, longer than anyone, and is buried at Mount Pleasant Cemetery. 375 Mount Pleasant Road, Yonge Street Line to St. Clair, then 74 Bus.

There have been plenty of TV shows set in Toronto, but most Americans wouldn't know them, so I won't list their filming locations. Probably the most familiar, due to its being shown on PBS, is Degrassi Junior High and its related series. Recently, ABC aired the Toronto-based cop series Rookie Blue.

Because Toronto has a lot of surviving Art Deco structures from the 1920s and '30s, it's frequently used as a filming location for period-piece movies, including the movie version of Chicago (despite Chicago also having many such buildings survive). There were also several scenes from the U.S. version of Fever Pitch (which, being Yankee Fans, we consider to be a horror film) that were shot in Toronto. One is the scene of the barbecue in the park: In the background, a statue can be seen. It's Queen Victoria. I seriously doubt that there are any statues of British monarchs left in Boston.

*

For some reason, the Jays list their start times as 1:07 and 7:07, instead of the usual 1:05/7:05 or the old-time 1:00/7:00 – or, as was the case with the Yankees while I was growing up, 2:00/8:00. This reflects what the starting time would be if it was, officially, 7 or 7:05.

Have fun, and remember, you're a guest in their country. Try not to go overboard with Yankeeness.

Living Hall-of-Famers by City, as of April 7, 2016

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1. New York, 73: Baseball: Whitey Ford, Reggie Jackson, Rich "Goose" Gossage, Dave Winfield, Rickey Henderson, Wade Boggs, Joe Torre, Tony Kubek, Tom Seaver, Mike Piazza, Tom Glavine, Pedro Martinez, Tim McCarver, Willie Mays, Vin Scully.

Football: Sam Huff, Y.A. Tittle, Fran Tarkenton, Harry Carson, Lawrence Taylor, Michael Strahan, Bill Parcells; Don Maynard, Joe Namath, John Riggins, Curtis Martin, Ron Wolf.

Basketball: Richie Guerin, Willis Reed, Walt Frazier, Bill Bradley, Earl Monroe, Jerry Lucas, Spencer Haywood, Bernard King, Patrick Ewing, Pat Riley, Bob Wolff, Marv Albert, John Andariese, Julius Erving, Bill Raftery.

Hockey: Harry Howell, Eddie Giacomin, Rod Gilbert, Jean Ratelle, Brad Park, Phil Esposito, Brian Leetch, Mike Gartner, Mark Messier, Emile Francis, Glen Sather, Sal Messina, John Davidson, Brendan Shanahan, Peter Stastny, Viacheslav Fetisov, Scott Stevens, Scott Niedermayer, Joe Nieuwendyk. Lou Lamoriello, Jacques Lemaire, Larry Robinson, Mike Emrick, Billy Smith, Denis Potvin, Clark Gillies, Bryan Trottier, Mike Bossy, Pat LaFontaine, Bill Torrey, Jiggs McDonald.

Manhattan separately, 27: Willie Mays; Richie Guerin, Willis Reed, Walt Frazier, Bill Bradley, Earl Monroe, Jerry Lucas, Spencer Haywood, Bernard King, Patrick Ewing, Pat Riley, Bob Wolff, Marv Albert, John Andariese; Harry Howell, Eddie Giacomin, Rod Gilbert, Jean Ratelle, Brad Park, Phil Esposito, Brian Leetch, Mike Gartner, Mark Messier, Emile Francis, Glen Sather, Sal Messina, John Davidson.

New Jersey separately, 16: Harry Carson, Lawrence Taylor, Michael Strahan, Bill Parcells, Curtis Martin; Bill Raftery; Brendan Shanahan, Peter Stastny, Viacheslav Fetisov, Scott Stevens, Scott Niedermayer, Joe Nieuwendyk. Lou Lamoriello, Jacques Lemaire, Larry Robinson, Mike Emrick.

Bronx separately, 11: Whitey Ford, Reggie Jackson, Rich "Goose" Gossage, Dave Winfield, Rickey Henderson, Wade Boggs, Joe Torre, Tony Kubek; Sam Huff, Y.A. Tittle, Fran Tarkenton.

Queens separately, 10: Joe Torre, Tom Seaver, Mike Piazza, Tom Glavine, Pedro Martinez, Tim McCarver; Don Maynard, Joe Namath, John Riggins, Ron Wolf.

Long Island separately, 10: Julius Erving, Bill Raftery; Billy Smith, Denis Potvin, Clark Gillies, Bryan Trottier, Mike Bossy, Pat LaFontaine, Bill Torrey, Jiggs McDonald.

Brooklyn separately, 1: Vin Scully.

Staten Island separately, none. 

2. San Francisco Bay Area, 44: Willie Mays, Orlando Cepeda, Willie McCovey, Juan Marichal, Gaylord Perry, Jon Miller, Reggie Jackson, Rollie Fingers, Rickey Henderson, Dennis Eckersley, Tony LaRussa; Y.A. Tittle, Hugh McElhenny, Dave Wilcox, Jimmy Johnson, Joe Montana, Fred Dean, Ronnie Lott, Jerry Rice, Steve Young, Charles Haley, Eddie DeBartolo, Jim Otto, Fred Biletnikoff, Willie Brown, Art Shell, Dave Casper, Ray Guy, Ted Hendricks, Mike Haynes, Howie Long, Marcus Allen, Jerry Rice, Warren Sapp, Tim Brown, John Madden, Ron Wolf; Nate Thurmond, Rick Barry, Jamaal Wilkes, Robert Parish, Chris Mullin, Sarunas Marciulionis, Don Nelson.

Oakland separately, 27: Reggie Jackson, Rollie Fingers, Rickey Henderson, Dennis Eckersley, Tony LaRussa; Jim Otto, Fred Biletnikoff, Willie Brown, Art Shell, Dave Casper, Ray Guy, Ted Hendricks, Mike Haynes, Howie Long, Marcus Allen, Jerry Rice, Warren Sapp, Tim Brown, John Madden, Ron Wolf; Nate Thurmond, Rick Barry, Jamaal Wilkes, Robert Parish, Chris Mullin, Sarunas Marciulionis, Don Nelson.

San Francisco separately, 19: Willie Mays, Orlando Cepeda, Willie McCovey, Juan Marichal, Gaylord Perry, Jon Miller; Y.A. Tittle, Hugh McElhenny, Dave Wilcox, Jimmy Johnson, Joe Montana, Fred Dean, Ronnie Lott, Jerry Rice, Steve Young, Charles Haley, Eddie DeBartolo; Nate Thurmond, Rick Barry.

San Jose separately, none.

3. Los Angeles area, 42: Sandy Koufax, Don Sutton, Mike Piazza, Tommy Lasorda, Vin Scully, Jamie Jarrin, Nolan Ryan, Rod Carew, Reggie Jackson, Bert Blyleven, Dick Enberg; Tom Mack, Jackie Slater, Jack Youngblood, Eric Dickerson, Kevin Greene, Mike Haynes, Howie Long,
Marcus Allen; Elgin Baylor, Jerry West, Gail Goodrich, Wilt Chamberlain, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Jamaal Wilkes, Magic Johnson, Bob McAdoo, James Worthy, Shaquille O'Neal, Pat Riley, Phil Jackson; Marcel Dionne, Larry Murphy, Luc Robitaille, Wayne Gretzky, Rob Blake, Larry Murphy, Jiggs McDonald, Bob Miller, Nick Nickson, Scott Niedermayer, Chris Pronger.

Los Angeles separately, 24: Sandy Koufax, Don Sutton, Mike Piazza, Tommy Lasorda, Vin Scully, Jamie Jarrin, Dick Enberg; Tom Mack, Jack Youngblood, Mike Haynes, Howie Long, Marcus Allen; Elgin Baylor, Jerry West, Gail Goodrich, Wilt Chamberlain, Shaquille O'Neal, Pat Riley, Phil Jackson; Rob Blake, Larry Murphy, Jiggs McDonald, Bob Miller, Nick Nickson.

Inglewood separately, 19: Elgin Baylor, Jerry West, Gail Goodrich, Wilt Chamberlain, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Jamaal Wilkes, Magic Johnson, Bob McAdoo, James Worthy, Shaquille O'Neal, Marcel Dionne, Larry Murphy, Luc Robitaille, Wayne Gretzky, Rob Blake, Larry Murphy, Jiggs McDonald, Bob Miller, Nick Nickson.

Anaheim separately, 10: Nolan Ryan, Rod Carew, Reggie Jackson, Bert Blyleven, Dick Enberg; Jackie Slater, Eric Dickerson, Kevin Greene; Scott Niedermayer, Chris Pronger.

4. Boston, 41: Bobby Doerr, Carl Yastrzemski, Carlton Fisk, Jim Rice, Dennis Eckersley, Wade Boggs, Pedro Martinez; Nick Buoniconti, John Hannah, Mike Haynes, Andre Tippett, Curtis Martin, Bill Parcells, Don Criqui; Bob Cousy, Frank Ramsey, Tommy Heinsohn, Bill Russell, K.C. Jones, Sam Jones, Satch Sanders, John Havlicek, Bailey Howell, Dave Cowens, Jo Jo White, Larry Bird, Kevin McHale, Robert Parish, Tiny Archibald; Milt Schmidt, Leo Boivin, Johnny Bucyk, Bobby Orr, Phil Esposito, Gerry Cheevers, Brad Park, Jean Ratelle, Ray Bourque, Cam Neely, Adam Oates, Harry Sinden.

5. Toronto, 41: Roberto Alomar, Pat Gillick, Tony Kubek; Damon Allen, David Braley, Michael “Pinball” Clemons, Jim Corigall, Doug Flutie, Condredge Holloway, Marv Luster, Don Matthews, Bob O’Billovich, James “Quick” Parker, Willie Pless, Dave Raimey, Bill Symons, Pierre Vercheval, Tom Wilkinson; Lenny Wilkens; George Armstrong, Leo Boivin, Dick Duff, Bob Pulford, Frank Mahovlich, Johnny Bower, Bert Olmstead, Leonard "Red" Kelly, Dave Keon, Norm Ullman, Darryl Sittler, Lanny McDonald, Borje Salming, Doug Gilmour, Mats Sundin, Ed Belfour, Jim Gregory, Cliff Fletcher, Howie Meeker, Brian McFarlane, Bob Cole, Harry Neale.

6. Chicago, 39: Billy Williams, Ferguson Jenkins, Bruce Sutter, Ryne Sandberg, Andre Dawson, Greg Maddux, Luis Aparicio, Goose Gossage, Carlton Fisk, Frank Thomas, Tony LaRussa; Doug Atkins, Mike Ditka, Dick Butkus, Gale Sayers, Alan Page, Richard Dent, Dan Hampton, Mike Singletary, Charlie Trippi; Chet Walker, Artis Gilmore, Jerry Sloan, Michael Jordan, Scottie Pippen, Dennis Rodman, Phil Jackson, Jerry Reinsdorf; Pierre Pilote, Glenn Hall, Bobby Hull, Stan Mikita, Phil Esposito, Tony Esposito, Denis Savard, Ed Belfour, Michel Goulet, Chris Chelios, Pat Foley.

North Side separately, 10: Billy Williams, Ferguson Jenkins, Bruce Sutter, Ryne Sandberg, Andre Dawson, Greg Maddux; Doug Atkins, Mike Ditka, Dick Butkus, Gale Sayers.

West Side separately, 19: Chet Walker, Artis Gilmore, Jerry Sloan, Michael Jordan, Scottie Pippen, Dennis Rodman, Phil Jackson, Jerry Reinsdorf; Pierre Pilote, Glenn Hall, Bobby Hull, Stan Mikita, Phil Esposito, Tony Esposito, Denis Savard, Ed Belfour, Michel Goulet, Chris Chelios, Pat Foley.

South Side separately, 11: Luis Aparicio, Goose Gossage, Carlton Fisk, Frank Thomas, Tony LaRussa; Mike Ditka, Alan Page, Richard Dent, Dan Hampton, Mike Singletary, Charlie Trippi.

7. Detroit, 39: Al Kaline,Jim Bunning; Joe Schmidt, Lem Barney, Dick LeBeau, Barry Sanders; Bailey Howell, Bob Lanier, Dave Bing, Isiah Thomas, Joe Dumars, Dennis Rodman, Larry Brown, Bob Wolff; Ted Lindsay, Gordie Howe, Leonard "Red" Kelly, Alex Delvecchio, Glenn Hall, Norm Ullman, Marcel Dionne, Dino Ciccarelli, Adam Oates, Steve Yzerman, Sergei Fedorov, Viacheslav Fetisov, Nicklas Lidstrom, Igor Larionov, Brendan Shanahan, Larry Murphy, Dominik Hasek, Brett Hull, Chris Chelios, John Ziegler, Mike Ilitch, Scotty Bowman, Jim Devellano, Bruce Martyn, Mickey Redmond.

8. Montreal, 37: Andre Dawson, Pedro Martinez, Dave Van Horne; Montreal: Junior Ah You, Wally Buono, Ben Cahoon, Terry Evanshen, Gene Gaines, Ed George, Tracy Ham, Dickie Harris, Marv Luster, Don Matthews, Elfrid Payton, Mike Pringle, Uzooma Ukeke, Pierre Vercheval, Dan Yochum; Henri Richard, Dick Duff, Jacques Laperriere, Yvan Cournoyer, Guy Lapointe, Jacques Lemaire, Serge Savard, Frank Mahovlich, Ken Dryden, Steve Shutt, Larry Robinson, Guy Lafleur, Bob Gainey, Rod Langway, Chris Chelios, Patrick Roy, Denis Savard, Scotty Bowman, Dick Irvin Jr.

9. Edmonton, 35:  Damon Allen, Danny Bass, Hugh Campbell, Tommy Joe Coffey, Red Connop, Dave Cutler, Matt Dunigan, Ron Estay, Dave Fennell, Brian Fryer, Tracy Ham, Larry Highbaugh, Brian Kelly, Danny Kepley, Norm Kimball, Normie Kwong, Neil Lumsden, Don Matthews, George McGowan, Warren Moon, James “Quick” Parker, Willie Pless, Tom Scott, Terry Vaughn, Pierre Vercheval, Tom Wilkinson, Henry “Gizmo” Williams; Wayne Gretzky, Mark Messier, Paul Coffey, Jari Kurri, Glenn Anderson, Grant Fuhr, Glen Sather, Rod Phillips.

10. St. Louis, 29: Red Schoendienst, Bob Gibson, Lou Brock, Orlando Cepeda, Steve Carlton, Bruce Sutter, Ozzie Smith, Whitey Herzog, Tony LaRussa; Larry Wilson, Dan Dierdorf, Jackie Smith, Roger Wehrli, Orlando Pace, Marshall Faulk, Aeneas Williams; Bob Pettit, Lenny Wilkens; Glenn Hall, Bernie Federko, Joe Mullen, Doug Gilmour, Brett Hull, Al MacInnis, Brendan Shanahan, Grant Fuhr, Chris Pronger, Scotty Bowman, Emile Francis.

11. Pittsburgh, 24: Bill Mazeroski, Bert Blyleven; Joe Greene, Terry Bradshaw, Franco Harris, Jack Lambert, Jack Ham, Lynn Swann, John Stallworth, Mel Blount, Rod Woodson, Dermontti Dawson, Jerome Bettis, Dan Rooney; Connie Hawkins; Mario Lemieux, Paul Coffey, Bryan Trottier, Larry Murphy, Joe Mullen, Ron Francis, Craig Patrick, Scotty Bowman, Mike Lange.

12. Washington, 24: Frank Robinson, Bob Wolff; Bobby Mitchell, Sonny Jurgensen, Charley Taylor, Sam Huff, Paul Krause, Chris Hanburger, Ken Houston, John Riggins, Art Monk, Russ Grimm, Darrell Green, Bruce Smith, Joe Gibbs; Elvin Hayes, Wes Unseld, Bernard King; Mike Gartner, Rod Langway, Scott Stevens, Larry Murphy, Adam Oates, Ron Weber.

13. Dallas, 23: Ferguson Jenkins, Gaylord Perry, Nolan Ryan, Eric Nadel; Bob Lilly, Mel Renfro, Rayfield Wright, Mike Ditka, Roger Staubach, Randy White, Tony Dorsett, Troy Aikman, Emmitt Smith, Michael Irvin, Deion Sanders, Larry Allen, Charles Haley, Bill Parcells; Don Nelson; Mike Modano, Joe Nieuwendyk, Ed Belfour, Brett Hull.

14. Milwaukee/Green Bay, 22: Robin Yount, Paul Molitor, Rollie Fingers, Bob Uecker, Hank Aaron, Red Schoendienst; Bart Starr, Forrest Gregg, Paul Hornung, Jim Taylor, Willie Davis, Willie Wood, Herb Adderley, Dave Robinson, James Lofton, Jan Stenerud, Brett Favre, Ron Wolf; Oscar Robertson, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Bob Lanier, Don Nelson, Wayne Embry, Eddie Doucette.

15. Calgary, 22: Wally Buono, Jerry Campbell, Eddie Davis, Terry Evanshen, Doug Flutie, John Helton, Alondra Johnson, Jerry Keeling, Tony Pajaczkowski, Allen Pitts, Rocco Romano, Terry Vaughn, Harvey Wylie, Dave Dickenson; Al MacInnis, Lanny McDonald, Joe Nieuwendyk, Doug Gilmour, Joe Mullen, Phil Housley, Cliff Fletcher, Peter Maher.

16. Houston, 21: Joe Morgan, Nolan Ryan, Craig Biggio; Houston Oilers, 9: Curley Culp, Elvin Bethea, Earl Campbell, Dave Casper, Ken Houston, Charlie Joiner, Warren Moon, Mike Munchak, Bruce Matthews; Elvin Hayes, Calvin Murphy, Ralph Sampson, Hakeem Olajuwon, Clyde Drexler, Dikembe Mutombo, Yao Ming; Gordie Howe, Mark Howe. 

17. Philadelphia, 19: Jim Bunning, Steve Carlton, Mike Schmidt, Pat Gillick; Sonny Jurgensen, Tommy McDonald, Bob Brown; Hal Greer, Chet Walker, Billy Cunningham, Julius Erving, Charles Barkley, Allen Iverson, Larry BrownBernie Parent, Bobby Clarke, Bill Barber, Mark Howe, Ed Snider.

18. Winnipeg, 19: Greg Battle, Paul Bennett, John Bonk, Dieter Brock, Tom Clements, Bud Grant, John Helton, Gerry James, Tyrone Jones, James Murphy, Elfrid Payton, Ken Ploen, Joe Poplawski, Dave Raimey, Charles Roberts, Tom Scott, Chris Walby; Bobby Hull, Dale Hawerchuk.

19. Minnesota, 18: Rod Carew, Bert Blyleven; Fran Tarkenton, Carl Eller, Alan Page, Paul Krause, Ron Yary, Mick Tinglehoff, Chris Doleman, Gary Zimmerman, Randall McDaniel, Cris Carter, John Randle, Bud Grant; John Kundla; Dino Ciccarelli, Mike Modano, Jacques Lemaire.

20. Baltimore, 18: Brooks Robinson, Luis Aparicio, Frank Robinson, Jim Palmer, Eddie Murray, Cal Ripken, Roberto Alomar, Jon Miller; Raymond Berry, Gino Marchetti, Lenny Moore, Ted Hendricks, Don Shula, Rod Woodson, Jonathan Ogden, Ozzie Newsome; Earl Monroe, Wes Unseld.

21. Buffalo, 18: Billy Shaw, O.J. Simpson, Joe DeLamiellure, James Lofton, Jim Kelly, Bruce Smith, Thurman Thomas, Andre Reed, Marv Levy, Bill Polian; Bob McAdoo; Gilbert Perreault, Phil Housley, Dale Hawerchuk, Pat LaFontaine, Dominik Hasek, Scotty Bowman, Rick Jeanneret.

22. Hamilton, 18: Paul Bennett, David Braley, Less Browne, Bernie Custis, Tommy Joe Coffey, Grover Covington, Rocky DiPietro, Terry Evanshen, Darren Flutie, Tony Gabriel, Garney Henley, Danny McManus, Joe Montford, Angelo Mosca, Peter Neumann, Bob O’Billovich, Don Sutherin, Ben Zambiasi

23. Miami, 17: Felo Ramirez, Dave Van Horne; Pavel Bure, Bill Torrey; Larry Csonka, Nick Buoniconti, Bob Griese, Jim Langer, Larry Little, Paul Warfield, Dan Marino, Dwight Stephenson, Don Shula; Shaquille O'Neal, Alonzo Mourning, Gary Payton, Pat Riley.

24. Vancouver, 17: Norm Fieldgate, Tom Hinton, Willie Fleming, Tom Brown, Joe Kapp, Jim Young, Al Wilson, James “Quick” Parker, Lui Passaglia, Jim Mills, Darren Flutie, Don Matthews, David Braley, Wally Buono, Dave Dickenson; Pavel Bure, Jim Robson.

25. Denver, 15: Willie Brown, Floyd Little, John Elway, Shannon Sharpe, Gary Zimmerman; Dan Issel, David Thompson, Alex English, Dikembe Mutombo, Larry Brown; Joe Sakic, Peter Forsberg, Patrick Roy, Rob Blake, Ray Bourque.

26. Regina, 15: Hugh Campbell, George Reed, Ed McQuarters, Ted Urness, Bill Baker, Hugh Campbell, Roger Aldag, Ray Elgaard, Dave Ridgway, Bobby Jurasin, Tom Shepherd, Don Narcisse, Jack Abendschan, Gene Makowsky, Eddie Davis

27. Kansas City, 14: George Brett, Whitey Herzog, Denny Matthews; Bobby Bell, Len Dawson, Willie Lanier, Emmitt Thomas, Curley Culp, Jan Stenerud, Marcus Allen, Willie Roaf, Will Shields, Mary Levy; Nate “Tiny” Archibald.

28. Ottawa, 14: Jerry Campbell, Tom Clements, Tony Gabriel, Gene Gaines, Tony Golab, Condredge Holloway, Russ Jackson, Ken Lehmann, Rudy Phillips, Moe Racine, Ron Stewart, Dave Thelen, Whit Tucker, Kaye Vaughan

29. Atlanta, 13: Hank Aaron, Phil Niekro, Tom Glavine, Greg Maddux, John Smoltz, Bobby Cox, Joe Torre; Deion Sanders, Claude Humphrey; Walt Bellamy, Dominique Wilkens, Dikembe Mutombo, Lenny Wilkens.

30. San Diego, 12: Dave Winfield, Ozzie Smith, Rollie Fingers, Goose Gossage, Dick Enberg; Ron Mix, Lance Alworth, Fred Dean, Dan Fouts, Charlie Joiner, Kellen Winslow; Bill Walton.

24. Cincinnati, 11: Frank Robinson, Johnny Bench, Tony Perez, Joe Morgan, Tom Seaver, Barry Larkin, Ken Griffey Jr., Marty Brennaman; Charlie Joiner, Anthony Munoz; Oscar Robertson.

31. Cleveland, 10: Gaylord Perry; Jim Brown, Bobby Mitchell, Leroy Kelly, Paul Warfield, Joe DeLamiellure, Ozzie Newsome; Wayne Embry, Lenny Wilkens, Joe Tait.

32. Seattle, 10: Randy Johnson, Ken Griffey Jr., Pat Gillick; Steve Largent, Cortez Kennedy, Walter Jones; Lenny Wilkens, Gary Payton, Spencer Haywood, Bill Russell.

33. Indianapolis, 8: Eric Dickerson, Marshall Faulk, Marvin Harrison, Tony Dungy, Bill Polian; Reggie Miller, Chris Mullin, Slick Leonard.

34. Phoenix, 6: Randy Johnson, Aeneas Williams; Connie Hawkins, Charles Barkley, Jerry Colangelo, Al McCoy.

35. Portland, 5: Bill Walton, Clyde Drexler, Arvydas Sabonis, Scottie Pippen, Bill Schonely.

36. Utah, 4: Adrian Dantley, John Stockton, Karl Malone, Jerry Sloan.

37. Tampa Bay, 4: Warren Sapp, Derrick Brooks, Tony Dungy, Ron Wolf.

38. Carolina, 4: Bill Polian; Alonzo Mourning; Ron Francis, Chuck Kaiton.

39. San Antonio, 3: George Gervin, Artis Gilmore, David Robinson.

40. New Orleans, 3: Rickey Jackson, Willie Roaf, Jim Finks.

41. Nashville, 1: Bruce Matthews.

42. Orlando, 1: Shaquille O'Neal.

43. Sacramento, 1: Mitch Richmond.

44. Columbus, 1: Sergei Fedorov.

45. Oklahoma City, none.

46. Memphis, none.


47. Jacksonville, none. 

Yanks Take 2 of 1st 3 vs. Astros

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When you start a season 0-1, it's not good. But, in the words of the immortal Casey Stengel, "The Yankees don't pay me to win every day, just two out of every three."

Win 2 out of every 3 games, you'll finish 108-54.

Nathan Eovaldi, whose great season put the Yankees in position to win the AL East last year, but whose injury caused him to miss all of September and was one reason why they didn't win it, started the series finale with the Houston Astros yesterday, and was shaky. He had a great strikeout-to-walk ratio of 7-0, but went just 5 innings and allowed 5 runs on 6 hits.

The bullpen, however, was superb. (Yes, I know: I use the word "superb" a lot. I also overuse "shaky.") Between them, Kirby Yates (a 29-year-old righthanded native of Hawaii, wearing Number 39, making his Yankee debut, brother of former Met pitcher Tyler Yates), Chasen Shreve, Dellin Betances and Andrew Miller went 4 innings, allowing only 3 baserunners, all singles.

Between them, the 5 Yankee pitchers had 14 strikeouts and no walks. Cliche alert: "Those walks will kill you" -- but not if you don't issue them.

The Yankees trailed 3-0 in the bottom of the 2nd inning, and 5-2 in the bottom of the 4th. But Brain McCann and Starlin Castro (now looking like a great pickup) both hit home runs in the 4th (McCann's 1st homer of the season, Castro already with his 2nd), and Mark Teixeira hit a Teix Message in the 7th (his 2nd).

Yankees 8, Astros 5. WP: Shreve (1-0). SV: Miller (1). LP: Will Harris (0-1).

As bad as that opener was, the Yankees took 2 out of 3 against the 'Stros, 26-16 on aggregate. (I know, it doesn't work that way in this sport, and it doesn't give us credit for 3 wins, only 2.) It was 9-5 on the average. (It doesn't work that way, either.)

The Yankees have gone out to Detroit for a 3-game series. Today is the Tigers' home opener. It's expected to be cold. Here are the intended starting pitchers:

* Today, 1:10: Luis Severino vs. Jordan Zimmermann.
* Tomorrow, 1:10: CC Sabathia vs. former Met Mike Pelfrey.
* Sunday night, 8:10 on ESPN: Masahiro Tanaka vs. Justin Verlander.

The Mets have their home opener at Pity Field today, against the Philadelphia Phillies. No doubt, they will unveil their 2015 National League Pennant, their 8th banner, along with their 1969 and 1986 World Championships, their 1973 and 2000 Pennants, their 1999 Wild Card berth, and their 2006 NL East title.

The Mets hang banners for sub-World Series wins.

That's cute.

How to Be a Red Bulls Fan In San Jose -- 2016 Edition

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This coming Wednesday night, the New York Red Bulls will be in the San Francisco Bay Area, to play the San Jose Earthquakes. It will be Metro's 1st visit to the new Avaya Stadium, not having been scheduled to play them away last year.

Before You Go. The San Francisco Bay Area has inconsistent weather. San Francisco, in particular, partly because it’s bounded by water on three sides, is the one city I know of that has baseball weather in football season and football weather in baseball season. Or, as Mark Twain, who worked for a San Francisco newspaper during the Civil War, put it, “The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco.”

The websites of the San Jose Mercury News and the Oakland Tribune, and SFgate.com, the website of the San Francisco Chronicle, should be checked before you leave. For next Wednesday, they're predicting mid-60s during the day and high 40s at night. So a scarf, a traditional soccer accoutrement, would be appropriate for the night game.

San Jose, the Bay Area as a whole, and the entire State of California are in the Pacific Time Zone, 3 hours behind New York and New Jersey. Adjust your timepieces accordingly.

Tickets. The Earthquakes averaged 20,979 fans per home game last season, a sellout. Getting tickets should not be very difficult.

Section 134, at the upper right corner of the horseshoe, is where away supporters are assigned. Tickets are $22.

Getting There. It’s 2,906 miles from Times Square in Midtown Manhattan to Union Square in downtown San Francisco, and 2,925 miles from Red Bull Arena in Harrison to Avaya Stadium in San Jose. This is the 2nd-longest Red Bulls roadtrip, behind only Vancouver. In other words, if you’re going, you’re flying.

You think I’m kidding? Even if you get someone to go with you, and you take turns, one drives while the other one sleeps, and you pack 2 days’ worth of food, and you use the side of the Interstate as a toilet, and you don’t get pulled over for speeding, you’ll still need over 2 full days. Each way.

But, if you really, really want to drive... Get onto Interstate 80 West in New Jersey, and – though incredibly long, it’s also incredibly simple – you’ll stay on I-80 for almost its entire length, which is 2,900 miles from Ridgefield Park, just beyond the New Jersey end of the George Washington Bridge, to the San Francisco end of the San Francisco-Oakland Bay Bridge.

If you're driving directly to San Jose (i.e., if your hotel is there), then, getting off I-80, you’ll need Exit 8A for I-880, the Nimitz Freeway – the 1997-rebuilt version of the double-decked expressway that collapsed, killing 42 people, during the Loma Prieta Earthquake that struck during the 1989 World Series between the 2 Bay Area teams. From I-880, you’ll take Exit 3, for Coleman Avenue.

Not counting rest stops, you should be in New Jersey for an hour and a half, Pennsylvania for 5:15, Ohio for 4 hours, Indiana for 2:30, Illinois for 2:45, Iowa for 5 hours, Nebraska for 7:45, Wyoming for 6:45, Utah for 3:15, Nevada for 6:45, and California for 3:15. That’s almost 49 hours, and with rest stops, and city traffic at each end, we’re talking 3 full days.

That’s still faster than Greyhound and Amtrak. Greyhound does stop in San Jose, at 70 S. Almaden Avenue at Post Street, within walking distance of the arena. But the trip averages about 80 hours, depending on the run, and will require you to change buses 2, 3, 4 or even 5 times. And you'd have to leave no later than Sunday morning to get there by Wednesday gametime. Round-trip fare is $570, but it can drop to $438 with advanced purchase.

On Amtrak, to make it in time for a Thursday night puck-drop, you would leave Penn Station on the Lake Shore Limited at 3:40 PM on Friday (tomorrow afternoon), arrive at Union Station in Chicago at 9:45 AM Central Time on Saturday, and switch to the California Zephyr at 2:00 PM, arriving at Emeryville, California at 4:10 PM Pacific Time on Wednesday. Round-trip fare: $523. Then you'd have to get to San Jose by 7:30 PM local time.

Amtrak service has been restored to downtown Oakland, at 245 2nd Street, in Jack London Square. Unfortunately, it’s a half-mile walk to the nearest BART station, at Lake Merritt (8th & Oak). For A's and Raiders games, the station at the Coliseum site, which is part of the BART station there, might be better. 700 73rd Street. And yet, for either of these stations, you'd still have to transfer at Emeryville to an Amtrak Coast Starlight train.

Getting back, the California Zephyr leaves Emeryville at 9:10 AM, arrives in Chicago at 2:50 PM 2 days later, and the Lake Shore Limited leaves at 9:30 PM and arrives in New York at 6:23 PM the next day. So we're talking a Thursday to the next week's Thursday operation by train.

Newark to San Francisco is sometimes a relatively cheap flight, considering the distance. Not this time: A round-trip flight will cost around $900. You'd have to change planes once on the way to San Francisco, and then taking BART into the city. BART from SFO to downtown San Francisco takes 30 minutes, and it's $8.65. However, San Jose does have its own airport, named for the still-living former Congressman Norman Y. Mineta, and round-trip flights (again, nonstop) can be had for under $700. And Avaya Stadium is right next to that airport.

If you're trying to get from downtown San Francisco to San Jose, a 48-mile trip, CalTrain takes an hour and a half, and it's $19.50 round-trip to Diridon Station, 65 Cahill Street, 2 blocks south of the arena.

Once In the City. San Francisco was settled in 1776, and named for St. Francis of Assisi. San Jose was settled the next year, and named for Joseph, Jesus' earthly father. Both cities were incorporated in 1850. Oakland was founded in 1852, and named for oak trees in the area.

With the growth of the computer industry, San Jose has become the largest city in the San Francisco Bay Area, with a little over 1 million people. San Francisco has about 850,000, and Oakland 400,000. Overall, the Bay Area is home to 8.6 million people and rising, making it the 4th largest metropolitan area in North America, behind New York with 23 million, Los Angeles with 18 million, and Chicago with just under 10 million.

San Francisco doesn't really have a "city centerpoint," although street addresses seem to start at Market Street, which runs diagonally across the southeastern sector of the city, and contains the city's 8 stops on the Bay Area Rapid Transit (BART) subway system.

Most Oakland street addresses aren't divided into north-south, or east-west. The city does have numbered streets, starting with 1st Street on the bayfront and increasing as you move northeast. One of the BART stops in the city is called "12th Street Oakland City Center," and it's at 12th & Broadway, so if you're looking at a centerpoint for the city, that's as good as any. San Jose's street addresses are centered on 1st Street and Santa Clara Street.
A BART train

A BART ride within San Francisco is $1.75; going from downtown to Daly City, where the Cow Palace is, is $3.00; going from downtown SF to downtown Oakland is $3.15, and from downtown SF to the Oakland Coliseum complex is $3.85. In addition to BART, CalTrain and ACE -- Altamont Commuter Express -- link the Peninsula with San Francisco and San Jose.
CalTrain

The sales tax in California is 6.5 percent, and it rises to 8.75 percent within the City of San Francisco and the City of San Jose. It's 9 percent in Alameda County, including the City of Oakland. In San Francisco, food and pharmaceuticals are exempt from sales tax. (Buying marijuana from a street dealer doesn't count as such a "pharmaceutical," and pot brownies wouldn't count as such a "food." Although he probably wouldn't charge sales tax -- then again, it might be marked up so much, the sales tax would actually be a break.)

Important to note: Do not call San Francisco "Frisco." They hate that. "San Fran" is okay. And, like New York (sometimes more specifically, Manhattan), area residents tend to call it "The City." For a time, the Golden State Warriors, then named the San Francisco Warriors, actually had "THE CITY" on their jerseys. They will occasionally bring back throwback jerseys saying that.

Going In. Avaya Stadium, named for a local communications technology company, is at 1123 Coleman Avenue & Newhall Drive. It is 3 1/2 miles from downtown San Jose, 41 miles from downtown Oakland, and 46 from downtown San Francisco. It is between San Jose's Norman Y. Mineta International Airport (named for a former Congressman) and Santa Clara University.
If you're driving, parking is $25. If you're taking public transportation, you take ACE (Altamont Commuter Express) to Great America-Santa Clara.

The stadium it is soccer-specific and seats 18,000 people. They do not share it with anyone. The stadium is a horseshoe, with the open end pointing northeast, and its surface is natural grass.
It has hosted matches of the U.S. women's soccer team, but not yet the men's team. It has also hosted rugby. This coming July 28, it will host the MLS All-Star Game, featuring the MLS All-Stars vs. North London giants Arsenal.

Food. San Francisco, due to being a waterfront city and a transportation and freight hub, has a reputation as one of America’s best food cities. San Jose's arena benefits from this.

Avaya Stadium is said to feature "the largest outdoor bar on the West Coast." I don't know if that's true, but the possibility will appeal to some of you. There are concession stands all over, but nothing particularly specialized aside from a Beers of the World stand, and no chains.

Team History Displays. Like the Seattle Sounders, the Portland Timbers and the Small Club In Hempstead, the Earthquakes use the name of a team in the old North American Soccer League, in a vain attempt to convince people that their history actually precedes MLS.
In their case, it's actually a bad idea, since now only was the new version, founded with MLS, known as the San Jose Clash from 1996 to 1999, but it has been more successful than the old one. They won the MLS Cup in 2001 and 2003 and the Supporters' Shield in 2005 and 2012. But there doesn't seem to be any representation of that in the spectators' viewing area. They do, however, wear 2 stars, for the 2 MLS Cups, on their club crest.

Nor do they have any retired numbers. They do have a team Hall of Fame, which includes "Builders" Milan Mandaric and Peter Bridgewater, and 7 players: From the old Earthquakes, England's Paul Child, Scotland's Johnny Moore and Croatia's Momcilo Gavric; from the new Clash/Quakes, Americans John Doyle, Troy Dayak and Ramiro Corrales, and El Salvador's Ronald Cerritos. Northern Ireland legend George Best briefly played for the old Quakes, but is not in the team Hall of Fame.

The Bay Area Sports Hall of Fame (BASHOF) is unusual in that its exhibits are spread over several locations. No induction plaques are on display at Avaya Stadium, and no Earthquake players, old version or new, have yet been inducted.

Stuff. There are 6 Team Stores located throughout the stadium. There is no 20th -- or even 40th -- Anniversary team history video. But, last year, in conjunction with the new stadium opening, Gary Singh published The San Jose Earthquakes: A Seismic Soccer Legacy, which looks at the history of Bay Area soccer all the way through.

During the Game. This is not a Raider game, where people come dressed as pirates, biker gangsters, Darth Vader, the Grim Reaper, and so on. Nor is this a Giant game where you might be wearing Dodger gear. This is an Earthquakes  game. While they're not particularly fond of their fellow Golden Staters the L.A. Galaxy (their rivalry is called the California Classico), you will be safe wearing your Red Bulls colors.

The Quakes' supporters groups, including the San Jose Ultras, the 1906 Ultras (named for the San Francisco Earthquake of the same year), Club Quake, Soccer Silicon Valley, The Casbah and The Faultline, take this seriously: In April 2013 at Buck Shaw Stadium, a Portland Timbers fan taunted them, and a Quakes fan assaulted him. He was arrested, and kicked out of the group.

The ultras do, however, make a lot of noise. Like South American soccer fans -- and Sharks fans, and college football fans at the University of Mississippi -- they are known for ringing cowbells. And, while they don't tolerate violence from their groups, they can get mean.
They have, however, forgotten that Pamela Anderson is from Vancouver, not Seattle.

Lars Frederiksen wrote a theme song for the Earthquakes, "Never Say Die," and recorded it with his band, which certainly sounds like a British soccer hooligan firm: The Old Firm Casuals. He says they're "the most punk rock team in MLS." I'm not sure about that: When you think of the Bay Area and music, you think jazz in the 1950s, psychedelic rock in the 1960s, heavy metal in the 1970s and 1980s, and grunge in the 1990s (though they were secondary to Seattle in that regard). Punk? The Sex Pistols played their last concert at Winterland in San Francisco in 1978. Though San Fran psychedelic band Jefferson Airplane's "Somebody to Love" could easily be tweaked into a soccer chant.

The "Casbah" firm name comes from the fact that the current version of the team was originally named the Clash, and The Clash had a song titled "Rock the Casbah." Their songs include some originals, such as "Since I Was Born," with its "Oh, San Jose" chorus.

The game against the Red Bulls this Wednesday will be College Night. Expect to see a lot of people wearing San Jose State, Santa Clara University, Stanford, Cal and USF stuff.

They hold auditions for National Anthem singers, instead of having a regular. The mascot is Q, a blue thing with white hair. He kind of looks like a Muppet version of Bernie Sanders.
After the Game. Again, Quakes fans are not Raider fans. And Avaya Stadium is far from any crime issues. Don't antagonize anyone, and you'll be fine.

If you want to go out for a postgame meal or drinks, In-N-Out Burger, MOD Pizza and Smart Cookies are all just to the east of the stadium. Lillie Mae's House of Soul Food is just up the block at 1290 Coleman Avenue (albeit with a Santa Clara address, not San Jose).

There are three bars in the Lower Nob Hill neighborhood of San Francisco that are worth mentioning. Aces, at 998 Sutter Street & Hyde Street in San Francisco’s Lower Nob Hill neighborhood, is said to have a Yankee sign out front and a Yankee Fan as the main bartender. It’s also the home port of Mets, NFL Giants, Knicks and Rangers fans in the Bay Area.

R Bar, at 1176 Sutter & Polk Street, is the local Jets fan hangout. And Greens Sports Bar, at 2239 Polk at Green Street, is also said to be a Yankee-friendly bar. Of course, you’ll have to get back to San Francisco to get there.

A recent Thrillist article on the best sports bars in every State named as California's the Kezar Pub, at 770 Stanyan Street, opposite the new Kezar Stadium in Golden Gate Park. Number 7 bus.

Sidelights. The San Francisco Bay Area, including the South Bay (which includes San Jose), has a very rich sports history. Here are some of the highlights:

* SAP Center. Named the San Jose Arena from its 1993 opening until 2001, the Compaq Center at San Jose until 2002, and the HP Pavilion at San Jose until 2013, the SAP Center at San Jose, a.k.a. the Shark Tank, is easily identifiable by its triangular, "shark-toothed" roof.
The arena also hosts the San Jose Barracudas of the American Hockey League. The Golden State Warriors played the 1996-97 season there, while their arena at the Oakland Coliseum complex, now named the Oracle Arena, was being renovated. The San Jose SaberCats of the Arena Football League played there, making the Playoffs 16 times, winning 10 Division titles and 4 ArenaBowls: 2002, 2004, 2007 and 2015. And yet, despite being the current holders of the league title, the SaberCats have suspended operations.

In the entire world, only Madison Square Garden, the Manchester Evening News Arena in England, and the Air Canada Centre in Toronto are stadiums or arenas that sell more tickets to non-sporting events, including concerts and wrestling.

If you’re a fan of the TV show The West Wing, this was the convention center where the ticket of Matt Santos and Leo McGarry was nominated. The official address is 525 W. Santa Clara Street, and it's right downtown. From San Francisco, ACE to San Jose Diridon Station.

* AT&T Park. Home of the Giants since 2000, it has been better for them than Candlestick -- aesthetically, competitively, financially, you name it. Winning 3 World Series since it opened, it's been home to The Freak (Tim Lincecum) and The Steroid Freak (Barry Bonds).

It's hosted some college football games, and a February 10, 2006 win by the U.S. soccer team over Japan. 24 Willie Mays Plaza, at 3rd & King Streets downtown.

* Oakland Coliseum complex. This includes the stadium that opened on September 18, 1966, and has been home to the A’s since 1968 and to the NFL’s Oakland Raiders from 1966 to 1981 and again since 1995; and the Oracle Arena, a somewhat-renovated version of the Oakland Coliseum Arena, home to the NBA’s Golden State Warriors on and off since 1966, and continuously since 1971 except for a one-year hiatus in San Jose while it was being renovated, 1996-97. Various defunct soccer teams played at the Coliseum, and the Bay Area’s former NHL team, the Oakland Seals/California Golden Seals, played at the arena from 1967 to 1976.

The Oakland Coliseum Arena opened on November 9, 1966, and became home to the Warriors in 1971 -- at which point they changed their name from "San Francisco Warriors" to "Golden State Warriors," as if representing the entire State of California had enabled the "California Angels" to take Los Angeles away from the Dodgers, and it didn't take L.A. away from the Lakers, either.

The arena also hosted the Oakland Oaks, who won the American Basketball Association title in 1969; the Oakland Seals, later the California Golden Seals (didn't work for them, either), from 1967 to 1976; the Golden Bay Earthquakes of the Major Indoor Soccer League; and select basketball games for the University of California from 1966 to 1999. It's also been a major concert venue, and hosted the Bay Area's own, the Grateful Dead, more times than any other building: 66. Elvis Presley sang at the Coliseum Arena on November 10, 1970 and November 11, 1972.

In 1996-97, the arena was gutted to expand it from 15,000 to 19,000 seats. (The Warriors spent that season in San Jose.) This transformed it from a 1960s arena that was too small by the 1990s into one that was ready for an early 21st Century sports crowd. It was renamed The Arena in Oakland in 1997 and the Oracle Arena in 2005. The Warriors plan to move into a new arena in San Francisco for the 2017-18 season.

* Seals Stadium. Home of the PCL’s San Francisco Seals from 1931 to 1957, the Mission Reds from 1931 to 1937, and the Giants in 1958 and ’59, it was the first home professional field of the DiMaggio brothers: First Vince, then Joe, and finally Dom all played for the Seals in the 1930s.

The Seals won Pennants there in 1931, ’35, ’43, ’44, ’45, ’46 and ’57 (their last season). It seated just 18,500, expanded to 22,900 for the Giants, and was never going to be more than a stopgap facility until the Giants’ larger park could be built. It was demolished right after the 1959 season, and the site now has a Safeway grocery store.

Bryant Street, 16th Street, Potrero Avenue and Alameda Street, in the Mission District. Hard to reach by public transport: The Number 10 bus goes down Townsend Street and Rhode Island Avenue until reaching 16th, but then it’s an 8-block walk. The Number 27 can be picked up at 5th & Harrison Streets, and will go right there.

* Candlestick Park. Home of the Giants from 1960 to 1999, the NFL 49ers since 1970, and the Raiders in the 1961 season, this may have been the most-maligned sports facility in North American history. Its seaside location (Candlestick Point) has led to spectators being stricken by wind (a.k.a. The Hawk), cold, and even fog.

It was open to the Bay until 1971, including the 1962 World Series between the Yankees and the Giants, and was then enclosed to expand it from 42,000 to 69,000 seats for the Niners. It also got artificial turf for the 1970 season, one of the first stadiums to have it – though, to the city’s credit, it was also the 1st NFL stadium and 2nd MLB stadium (after Comiskey Park in Chicago) to switch back to real grass.

The Giants only won 2 Pennants there, and never a World Series. But the 49ers have won 5 Super Bowls while playing there, with 3 of their 6 NFC Championship Games won as the home team. The NFL Giants did beat the 49ers in the 1990 NFC Championship Game, scoring no touchdowns but winning 15-13 thanks to 5 Matt Bahr field goals. The Beatles played their last “real concert” ever at the ‘Stick on August 29, 1966 – only 25,000 people came out, a total probably driven down by the stadium’s reputation and John Lennon’s comments about religion on that tour.

The Giants got out, and the 49ers have now done the same, with their new stadium opening last year. The last sporting event was a U.S. national soccer team win over Azerbaijan earlier this year, the 4th game the Stars & Stripes played there (2 wins, 2 losses). It has now been demolished, and good riddance.

Best way to the site by public transport isn’t a good one: The KT light rail at 4th & King Streets, at the CalTrain terminal, to 3rd & Gilman Streets, and then it’s almost a mile’s walk down Jagerson Avenue. So unless you’re driving/renting a car, or you’re a sports history buff who HAS to see the place, I wouldn’t suggest making time for it.

In spite of the Raiders' return, the 49ers are more popular -- according to a 2014 Atlantic Monthly
article, even in Alameda County. The Raiders remain more popular in the Los Angeles area, a holdover from their 1982-94 layover, and also a consequence of L.A. not having had a team since.

* Kezar Stadium. The 49ers played here from their 1946 founding until 1970, the Raiders spent their inaugural 1960 season here, and previous pro teams in the city also played at this facility at the southeastern corner of Golden Gate Park, a mere 10-minute walk from the fabled corner of Haight & Ashbury Streets.

High school football, including the annual City Championship played on Thanksgiving Day, used to be held here as well. Bob St. Clair, who played there in high school, college (University of San Francisco) and the NFL in a Hall of Fame career with the 49ers, has compared it to Chicago’s Wrigley Field as a “neighborhood stadium.” After the 49ers left, it became a major concert venue.

The original 60,000-seat structure was built in 1925, and was torn down in 1989 (a few months before the earthquake, so there’s no way to know what the quake would have done to it), and was replaced in 1990 with a 9,000-seat stadium, much more suitable for high school sports. The original Kezar, named for one of the city’s pioneering families, had a cameo in the Clint Eastwood film Dirty Harry. Frederick & Stanyan Streets, Kezar Drive and Arguello Blvd. MUNI light rail N train.

* Emeryville Park. Also known as Oaks Park, this was the home of the Pacific Coast League’s Oakland Oaks from 1913 until 1955. The Oaks won Pennants there in 1927, ’48, ’50 and ’54.

Most notable of these was the 1948 Pennant, won by a group of players who had nearly all played in the majors and were considered old, and were known as the Nine Old Men (a name often given to the U.S. Supreme Court). These old men included former Yankee 1st baseman Nick Etten, the previous year’s World Series hero Cookie Lavagetto of the Brooklyn Dodgers (an Oakland native), Hall of Fame catcher Ernie Lombardi (another Oakland native), and one very young player, a 20-year-old 2nd baseman from Berkeley named Billy Martin. Their manager? Casey Stengel. Impressed by Casey’s feat of managing the Nine Old Men to a Pennant in a league that was pretty much major league quality, and by his previously having managed the minor-league version of the Milwaukee Brewers to an American Association Pennant, Yankee owners Dan Topping and Del Webb hired Casey to manage in 1949. Casey told Billy that if he ever got the chance to bring him east, he would, and he was as good as his word.

Pixar Studios has built property on the site. 45th Street, San Pablo Avenue, Park Avenue and Watts Street, Emeryville, near the Amtrak station. Number 72 bus from Jack London Square.

* Frank Youell Field. This was another stopgap facility, used by the Raiders from 1962 to 1965, a 22,000-seat stadium that was named after an Oakland undertaker – perhaps fitting, although the Raiders didn’t yet have that image. Interestingly from a New York perspective, the first game here was between the Raiders and the forerunners of the Jets, the New York Titans.

It was demolished in 1969. A new field of the same name was built on the site for Laney College. East 8th Street, 5th Avenue, East 10th Street and the Oakland Estuary. Lake Merritt BART station.

* Cow Palace. The more familiar name of the Grand National Livestock Pavilion, this big barn just south of the City Line in Daly City has hosted just about everything, from livestock shows and rodeos to the 1956 and 1964 Republican National Conventions. (Yes, the Republicans came here, not the “hippie” Democrats.)
The ’64 Convention is where New York’s Governor Nelson Rockefeller refused to be booed off the podium when he dared to speak out against the John Birch Society – the Tea Party idiots of their time – and when Senator Barry Goldwater of Arizona was nominated, telling them, “I would remind you, my fellow Republicans, that extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice! And I would remind you also that moderation in the pursuit of justice is no virtue.” (Personally, I think that extremism in the defense of liberty is no defense of liberty.)

Built in 1941, it is one of the oldest remaining former NBA and NHL sites, having hosted the NBA’s Warriors (then calling themselves the San Francisco Warriors) from 1962 to 1971, the NHL’s San Jose Sharks from their 1991 debut until their current arena could open in 1993, and several minor-league hockey teams.
A Sharks game at the Cow Palace

The 1960 NCAA Final Four was held here, culminating in Ohio State, led by Jerry Lucas and John Havlicek (with future coaching legend Bobby Knight as the 6th man) beating local heroes and defending National Champions California, led by Darrell Imhoff.

The Beatles played here on August 19, 1964 and August 31, 1965, and Elvis Presley sang here on November 13, 1970 and November 28 & 29, 1976. It was the site of Neil Young’s 1978 concert that produced the live album Live Rust and the concert film Rust Never Sleeps, and the 1986 Conspiracy of Hope benefit with Joan Baez, Lou Reed, Sting and U2. The acoustics of the place, and the loss of such legendary venues as the Fillmore West and the Winterland Ballroom, make it the Bay Area’s holiest active rock and roll site. 2600 Geneva Avenue at Santos Street, in Daly City. 8X bus.

In addition to the preceding, Elvis sang at the Auditorium Arena (now the Kaiser Convention Center, near the Laney College campus in Oakland) early in his career, on June 3, 1956 and again on October 27, 1957; and the San Francisco Civic Auditorium (now the Bill Graham Civic Auditorium, 99 Grove Street at Polk Street) on October 26, 1957.

* Levi's Stadium. The official address of Levi's Stadium is 4900 Marie P. DeBartolo Way, after the mother of former 49ers owner and newly-elected Pro Football Hall-of-Famer Eddie DeBartolo. (If you're going to apply to the U.S. Postal Service to make it 4900, why not 4949?) The intersection is Marie P. DeBartolo Way and Tasman Drive. It's 46 miles southeast of downtown San Francisco, 39 miles southeast of downtown Oakland, and 9 miles northwest of downtown San Jose. CalTrain from downtown San Francisco to Santa Clara station. California's Great America theme part is next-door. From downtown San Jose, take the 916 trolley.

It hosts the Pacific-12 Conference Championship Game, and in 2019 (for the 2018 season) it will host the College Football Playoff National Championship.

The NHL hosted a Stadium Series outdoor hockey game there last year ago, with the San Jose Sharks losing to their arch-rivals, the Los Angeles Kings. It is contracted to host 1 San Jose Earthquakes game per year, and last year Manchester United beat Barcelona there. It will host games of the 2016 Copa America.

* Previous Earthquakes Stadiums. The current team is actually the 3rd version of the San Jose Earthquakes. The 1st one played in the original North American Soccer League from 1974 to 1984, at Spartan Stadium. This has been home to San Jose State University sports since 1933, it hosted both the old Earthquakes, of the original North American Soccer League, from 1974 to 1984. It's hosted 3 games of the U.S. national team, most recently a 2007 loss to China. 1251 S. 10th Street, San Jose. San Jose Municipal Stadium, home of the Triple-A San Jose Giants, is a block away at 588 E. Alma Avenue. From either downtown San Francisco or downtown Oakland, take BART to Fremont terminal, then 181 bus to 2nd & Santa Clara, then 68 bus to Monterey & Alma.

The 2nd version of the Quakes played at Spartan Stadium from 1996 to 2005, but ran into financial trouble, and got moved to become the Houston Dynamo. The 3rd version was started in 2008, and until 2014 played at Buck Shaw Stadium, now called Stevens Stadium, in Santa Clara, on the campus of Santa Clara University. Also accessible by the Santa Clara ACE station.

* Stanford Stadium. This is the home field of Stanford University in Palo Alto, down the Peninsula from San Francisco. Originally built in 1921, it was home to many great quarterbacks, from early 49ers signal-caller Frankie Albert to 1971 Heisman winner Jim Plunkett to John Elway. It hosted Super Bowl XIX in 1985, won by the 49ers over the Miami Dolphins – 1 of only 2 Super Bowls that ended up having had a team that could have been called a home team. (The other was XIV, the Los Angeles Rams losing to the Pittsburgh Steelers at the Rose Bowl.)

It also hosted San Francisco’s games of the 1994 World Cup, and the soccer games of the 1984 Olympics, even though most of the events of those Olympics were down the coast in Los Angeles. It hosted 10 games by the U.S. national team, totaling 4 wins, 2 losses, 2 draws.

The original 85,000-seat structure was demolished and replaced with a new 50,000-seat stadium in 2006. Arboretum Road & Galvez Street. Caltrain to Palo Alto, 36 miles from downtown Oakland, 35 from downtown San Francisco, 19 from downtown San Jose.

* California Memorial Stadium. Home of Stanford’s arch-rivals, the University of California, at its main campus in Berkeley in the East Bay. (The school is generally known as “Cal” for sports, and “Berkeley” for most other purposes.) Its location in the Berkeley Hills makes it one of the nicest settings in college football. But it’s also, quite literally, on the Hayward Fault, a branch of the San Andreas Fault, so if “The Big One” had hit during a Cal home game, 72,000 people would have been screwed. With this in mind, the University renovated the stadium, making it safer and ready for 63,000 fans in 2012. So, like their arch-rivals Stanford, they now have a new stadium on the site of the old one.

The old stadium hosted 1 NFL game, and it was a very notable one: Due to a scheduling conflict with the A’s, the Raiders played a 1973 game there with the Miami Dolphins, and ended the Dolphins’ winning streak that included the entire 1972 season and Super Bowl VII. 76 Canyon Road, Berkeley. Downtown Berkeley stop on BART; 5 1/2 miles from downtown Oakland, 14 from downtown San Francisco, 48 from downtown San Jose.

Yankee Legend Joe DiMaggio, who grew up in San Francisco and later divided his time between there and South Florida, is buried at Holy Cross Cemetery in Colma, on the Peninsula. 1500 Mission Road & Lawndale Blvd. BART to South San Francisco, then about a 1-mile walk.

The Fillmore Auditorium was at Fillmore Street and Geary Boulevard, and it still stands and hosts live music. Bus 38L. Winterland Ballroom, home of the final concerts of The Band (filmed as The Last Waltz) and the Sex Pistols, was around the corner from the Fillmore at Post & Steiner Streets. And the legendary corner of Haight & Ashbury Streets can be reached via the 30 Bus, taking it to Haight and Masonic Avenue and walking 1 block west.

San Francisco, like New York, has a Museum of Modern Art (SFMOMA), at 151 3rd Street, downtown. The California Palace of the Legion of Honor is probably the city’s most famous museum, in Lincoln Park at the northwestern corner of the city, near the Presidio and the Golden Gate Bridge. (Any of you who are Trekkies, the Presidio is a now-closed military base that, in the Star Trek Universe, is the seat of Starfleet Command and Starfleet Academy.) And don’t forget to take a ride on one of them cable cars I’ve been hearing so dang much about.

Oakland isn’t much of a museum city, especially compared with San Francisco across the Bay. But the Oakland Museum of California (10th & Oak, Lake Merritt BART) and the Chabot Space & Science Center (10000 Skyline Blvd., not accessible by BART) may be worth a look.

The San Jose Museum of Art is at 110 S. Market Street. The Tech Museum of Innovation, something you might expect to see in the capital of Silicon Valley, is a block away at 201 S. Market. Both are downtown.

The tallest building in Northern California is the iconic Transamerica Pyramid, 853 feet high, opening in 1972 at 600 Montgomery Street downtown. If all goes according to schedule, it will be superseded next year by the Salesforce Tower, also downtown, at 415 Mission Street, rising 1,070 feet. Another skyscraper will open around the same time in Los Angeles, slightly higher, so the Salesforce Tower won't be the tallest building in California, much less the American West.

Unlike its anchor to the north, San Jose isn't a big skyscraper city. Its tallest building is "The 88," at 88 San Fernando Street, just 286 feet high.

The Bay Area has never produced a President. Herbert Hoover comes the closest, as he was in Stanford's 1st graduating class, but he grew up in Iowa and Oregon. His residence on the Palo Alto campus does not seem to have been preserved, but the Hoover Tower at 550 Serra Mall is adjacent to the Herbert Hoover Memorial Exhibit Pavilion.

Earl Warren, then Governor, was nominated for Vice President by the Republicans in 1948, before becoming Chief Justice of the United States, but, while he went to Berkeley and lived in Oakland, he grew up in Bakersfield. Pat Brown, whom Warren crossed party lines to support for San Francisco District Attorney, was elected to 3 terms as Governor, but his 1960 Presidential bid fizzled. His son Jerry was both the youngest (1975-82, 36) and the oldest (2011-present, almost 78) Governor in the State's history, but his 1976, '80 and '92 Presidential runs also went nowhere. And no Bay Area politician has even gotten that close since.

As I said earlier, the Republicans had their 1956 and 1964 Conventions at the Cow Palace, nominating Dwight D. Eisenhower successfully and Barry Goldwater unsuccessfully, respectively. The Democrats had their 1920 Convention at the aforementioned Civic Auditorium, nominating Governor Jim Cox of Ohio, who lost to Warren Harding in a massive landslide. They returned in 1984, to the Moscone Convention Center, named for Mayor George Moscone, elected in 1975 assassinated in 1978, along with Supervisor Harvey Milk. 747 Howard Street, downtown.

The Palace of Fine Arts isn't just an art museum, it has a theater that hosted one of the 1976 Presidential Debates between Gerald Ford and Jimmy Carter -- the one where Ford said, "There is no Soviet domination in Eastern Europe." 3301 Lyon Street. Bus 30.

While San Francisco has been the setting for lots of TV shows (from Ironside and The Streets of San Francisco in the 1970s, to Full House and Dharma & Greg in the 1990s), Oakland, being much less glamorous, has had only one that I know of: Hangin' With Mr. Cooper, comedian Mark Curry's show about a former basketball player who returns to his old high school to teach. And San Jose hasn't had enough that much.

In contrast, lots of movies have been shot in Oakland, including a pair of baseball-themed movies shot at the Coliseum: Moneyball, based on Michael Lewis' book about the early 2000s A's, with Brad Pitt as general manager Billy Beane; and the 1994 remake of Angels In the Outfield, filmed there because a recent earthquake had damaged the real-life Angels' Anaheim Stadium, and it couldn't be repaired in time for filming.

Movies set in San Francisco often take advantage of the city's topography, and include the Dirty Harry series, Bullitt (based on the same real-life cop, Dave Toschi); The Maltese Falcon, starring Humphrey Bogart; Woody Allen's Bogart tribute, Play It Again, Sam; The Lady from Shanghai, the original version of D.O.A., 48 Hrs., and Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home -- with the aircraft carrier USS Ranger, at the Alameda naval base, standing in for the carrier Enterprise, which was then away at sea.

The 1936 film San Francisco takes place around the earthquake and fire that devastated the city in 1906. And Milk starred Sean Penn as Harvey Milk, America's 1st openly gay successful politician, elected to San Francisco's Board of Supervisors in 1977 before being assassinated with Mayor George Moscone the next year.

Movies set in San Francisco often have scenes filmed there and in Oakland, including Pal Joey, Mahogany, Basic Instinct, the James Bond film A View to a Kill, and Mrs. Doubtfire, starring San Francisco native Robin Williams.

In contrast, San Jose has not yet been a major location for TV shows and movies. Alfred Hitchcock filmed Vertigo and The Birds in and around San Francisco, but did go to San Jose's Diridon Station to film the Connecticut-based train scene for his 1964 film Marnie.

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So, if you can afford it, go on out and join your fellow Red Bulls fans in going coast-to-coast, and take on the San Jose Earthquakes. Just be nice to your hosts, and (if you're also a Devils fan) hope that ex-Devils coach Peter DeBoer, now coaching the Sharks, doesn't come of, and you should be all right.

Yankee Bats: That's Cold, Man. That's Cold.

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The Yankees started a 3-game series away to the Detroit Tigers yesterday. Here's what they got at bat:

* A walk by Brett Gardner in the 1st inning -- erased by a double play.

* A walk by Chase Headley in the 2nd -- stranded.

* A single by Jacoby Ellsbury in the 3rd -- and then he was caught stealing.

* A single by Mark Teixeira in the 4th -- stranded.

* A walk by Teixeira in the 7th, and he reached 2nd base on a wild pitch, still only 1 out -- stranded.

* A walk by Austin Romine in the 8th -- stranded.

* A leadoff single by Gardner in the 9th, subsequently forced out by a Starlin Castro grounder -- and Teix and Carlos Beltran called out on strikes. (When you're Carlos Beltran, you take a called 3rd strike to the end game with a man on base. It's what you do.)

That's it. We got 3 singles and 4 walks, and only 1 guy got as far as 2nd base (and even that wasn't his own doing). The bottom 5 places in the batting order went a collective 0-for-14 (with 2 walks).

I know it was a bit chilly in Motown, but the Yankee bats? That's cold, man. That's cold.

I know Comerica Park is a pitcher's park, but that is unacceptable.

Also unacceptable is this Yankee trend of the 2013, '14 and '15 seasons, apparently back for '16: Scoring runs in bunches (25 over the preceding 2 games) and then we can't hit the ground if we fell off a ladder.

Luis Severino didn't pitch great, but our bats could very well have given him a chance to win. Johnny Barbato (a 23-year-old righthander from Miami, wearing Number 26) and Luis Cessa (a soon-to-be 24-year-old righthander from Veracruz, Mexico, becoming the 1st Yankee to wear Number 85 in a regular-season game), pitched decently in relief (Cessa did give up a home run to Miguel Cabrera), but it didn't matter.

It's worth noting that, since it was a roadtrip day game after a home night game, manager Joe Girardi gave Alex Rodriguez the day off. He also gave Beltran the day off until sending him up to pinch-hit in the 9th. In both cases, you can see how well that worked out.

Tigers 3, Yankees 0. WP: Jordan Zimmerman (1-0). No save was credited. LP: Severino (0-1).

The series continues this afternoon. CC Sabathia pitches his 1st game since going into alcohol rehab, against former Met Mike Pelfrey. I hope we get both the Sabathia and the Pelfrey of 2011.

It's supposed to be even colder. Maybe T.S. Eliot was right: "April is the cruelest month."

Actually, he was from St. Louis. He would never have written that if he was from New England. Or Chicago. Or a Met fan. He'd know it's October.

How to Be a Red Bulls Fan In Colorado -- 2016 Edition

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On Saturday night, April 16, the New York Red Bulls will visit the Denver area to play the Colorado Rapids.

If there's anything left of them, that is. They looked hopeless in losing 2-0 at home to Sporting Kansas City last night. Don't tell me SKC are a good team: It shouldn't matter who the opponent is, Metro should have put up a better effort than that.

Before You Go. The Denver Post is predicting low 60s for Saturday or Friday afternoon, but high 30s and rain for the evening. Bundle up and wear a hat.

Denver is in the Mountain Time Zone, so you’ll be 2 hours behind New York time. And there’s a reason it’s called the Mile High City: The elevation means the air will be thinner. Although the Rocky Mountain region is renowned for outdoor recreation, if you’re not used to it, try not to exert yourself too much. Cheering at a sporting event shouldn’t bother you too much, but even if the weather is good, don’t go rock-climbing or any other such activity unless you’ve done it before and know what you’re doing.

Tickets. The Rapids averaged 15,657 fans per home game last season, dead last in MLS, although it was about 86 percent of capacity, ranking them 13th out of 20. Tickets might not be hard to get.

Visiting supporters are assigned Section 100 at Dick's Sporting Goods Park, in the stadium's northeast corner. Tickets are $29.

Getting There. It’s 1,779 miles from Times Square in New York to downtown Denver, and 1,760 miles from Red Bull Arena in Harrison, New Jersey to Dick's Sporting Goods Park in Commerce City, Colorado. You’re probably thinking that you should be flying.

You can get a round-trip flight for Saturday morning, and buy it today, for a little over $500, depending on what time you want to fly. But it won’t be nonstop. While Stapleton Airport (named for 1923-47 Mayor Benjamin F. Stapleton) was a major change-planes-here spot for going to the West Coast and Las Vegas, the new Denver International Airport isn’t. You want to fly there, you’ll have to change planes, most likely in either Chicago or Dallas.

Amtrak’s Lake Shore Limited leaves Penn Station at 3:40 PM Thursday, arrives at Union Station in Chicago at 9:45 AM Frisday (that’s Central Time). The California Zephyr leaves Chicago at 2:00 PM Friday and arrives at Denver’s Union Station at 7:15 AM (Mountain Time) Saturday. The return trip would leave Denver at 7:10 PM Sunday, arrive in Chicago at 2:50 PM Monday, leave Chicago at 9:30 PM Monday, and get back to New York at 6:35 PM Tuesday. The round-trip fare is $448.

Union Station is at 1700 Wynkoop Street at 17th Street, which would be great if you were going to a Rockies game, as it's just 3 blocks from Coors Field. The front of the building is topped by a clock, framed by an old sign saying UNION STATION on top and TRAVEL by TRAIN on the bottom.
Greyhound allows you to leave Port Authority Bus Terminal at 4:00 PM Wednesday, and arrive at Denver at 10:50 AM on Saturday, a trip of just under 45 hours, without having to change buses. That 44:50 does, however, include layovers of 40 minutes in Philadelphia, an hour and a half in Pittsburgh, an hour in Columbus, an hour in Indianapolis, 2 hours in St. Louis, and and hour and a half in Kansas City; plus half-hour meal stops in Pennsylvania, Illinois, Kansas and Colorado.

Round-trip fare is $430 -- not much cheaper than the train, which is better -- but you can get it for $332 on advanced-purchase. You can get a bus back at 7:10 PM Sunday and be back in New York at 3:50 PM Tuesday. The Denver Bus Center is at 1055 19th Street.

If you actually think it’s worth it to drive, get someone to go with you, so you’ll have someone to talk to, and one of you can drive while the other sleeps. You’ll be taking Interstate 80 most of the way, through New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Ohio, Indiana, Illinois, Iowa and Nebraska, before taking Interstate 76 from Nebraska to Colorado, and then Interstate 25 into Denver. (An alternate route: Take the New Jersey and Pennsylvania Turnpikes to Interstate 70 and then I-70 through Pennsylvania, Ohio, Indiana, Illinois, Missouri, Kansas and Colorado into downtown Denver. It won’t save you an appreciable amount of time over the I-80 route, though.)

If you do it right, you should spend about an hour and a half in New Jersey, 5 hours and 15 minutes in Pennsylvania, 4 hours in Ohio, 2 hours and 30 minutes in Indiana, 2 hours and 45 minutes in Illinois, 5 hours and 15 minutes in Iowa, 6 hours in Nebraska, and 3 hours and 15 minutes in Colorado. Including rest stops, and accounting for traffic (you’ll be bypassing Cleveland and Chicago, unless that’s where you want to make rest stops), we’re talking about a 40-hour trip.

Get a hotel and spend a night. You’ll be exhausted otherwise. Trust me, I know: Trains and buses are not good ways to get sleep.

Once In the City. Founded in 1858 as a gold rush city, and named for James W. Denver, then Governor of the Kansas Territory, from which Colorado was separated, Denver is a State capital and city of 630,000 people, in a metro area of 3.2 million -- roughly the population of Brooklyn and Staten Island combined. It's easily the biggest city in, and thus the unofficial cultural capital of, the Rocky Mountain region.
The State House

Broadway is the main north-south drag, separating East addresses from West. But the northwestern quadrant of the street grid is at roughly a 45-degree angle from the rest of the city, and this area includes the central business district, Union Station and the ballpark.

The sales tax in the State of Colorado is 2.9 percent, however, the City of Denver adds a 3.62 percent sales tax, for a total of 6.52 percent. The Denver Post is a good paper, but don't bother looking for the Rocky Mountain News: It went out of business in 2009. Bus and light rail service in Denver is run by the Regional Transportation District (RTD), and goes for $2.25 for a single ride, and $6.75 for a DayPass.
Don't worry, the weather isn't forecast to look like this during your visit.
I chose this picture for the look of the train, not for the snow and wet streets.

Going In. The Denver area's Major League Soccer team, the Colorado Rapids, plays at Dick's Sporting Goods Park in Commerce City, about 8 miles northeast of downtown. It is distinctive because of its paneled triangular roof.

The official address is 6000 Victory Way. If you're going in by public transportation from downtown Denver, Number 48 bus to 60th Avenue & Dahlia Street, then Number 88 bus to 60th & Monaco. Then they make you walk 10 blocks on 60th to get to the stadium.

If you're driving in, parking is free! Yes, free: According to the team website...

For Colorado Rapids home games, the parking fee is already included in the price of each Rapids ticket, so no additional parking fees are required when arriving at the stadium for Rapids games. Parking attendants will be on site for directional purposes only.

Visiting Supporters have a specific tailgating location. This location is located between Lot BB and the West side of field 19. At this location you will be able to park and set up on the sidewalk while utilizing the restrooms located just north of your location.

Visiting Supporters are encouraged to meet at gate "A" 30 minutes prior to kick. During this time Argus Security will scan tickets and approve above cheering items.

Some fans call Dick's Sporting Goods Park by its initials: "DSG Park" or "DSGP." Better than its other nickname, "The Dick." It opened in 2007. The field is natural grass, and is aligned north-to-south. The West Stand is known as the Western Ridge. The East Stand is known as The Range.

The U.S. national team has played there 3 times: A 2009 win over Guatemala, and a 2013 win over Costa Rica, and a 2015 draw with Panama. The women's team has played there twice: A 2008 win over Brazil, and a 2012 win over Australia.
It's also hosted football, rugby, lacrosse and concerts. The band Phish always spends Labor Day weekend there.

Food. Being a “Wild West” city, you might expect Denver to have Western-themed stands with “real American food” at its arena. Being in a State with a Spanish name, in a land that used to belong to Mexico, you might also expect to have Mexican food. And you would be right on both counts.

There are 9 separate concession stands around the stadium, including a food court at the South End, called The Cantina. and another at the North End, called The Canyon. There's also a Picnic/Party Area outside at the northwest corner, similar to The Bullevard outside the west entrance to Red Bull Arena.

Team History Displays. The Rapids won the MLS Cup in 2010 (and, as a result, wear a star on their club badge), and were Finalists in 1997. They were also defeated Finalists for the U.S. Open Cup in 1999. As far as I can tell, there is no display in the stadium's spectator area honoring the 2010 MLS Cup win.

The Rapids Gallery of Honor is on the West Stand, and serves as a team hall of fame. However, their numbers are not retired.

Defender Marcelo Balboa, Number 17, was an original Rapid from 1996 to 2001, and a member of the 1990, '94 and '98 U.S. World Cup teams. Midfielder Paul Bravo, Number 9, played with the Rapids from 1997 to 2001, was an assistant coach the next 2 years, and since 2009 has been the club's technical director, partly responsible for building the 2010 MLS Cup win. They were the 1st 2 players honored, in 2003.

Midfielder Chris Henderson, Number 19, was an original Rapid, playing from 1996 to 2005, and closed his career with the Red Bulls in 2006. He represented the U.S. at the 1990 World Cup, the 1991 CONCACAF Gold Cup (winning it), and the 1992 Olympics. Scottish forward John Spencer (the only 1 of the 5 honorees not trained in the U.S.), Number 7, was a Rapid from 2001 to 2004. And Argentina-born, Arizona-raised midfielder Pablo Mastroeni, Number 25, starred for the club from 2002 to 2013, including the Cup win. He is now their manager. He helped the U.S. win the CONCACAF Gold Cup in 2002, 2005 and 2007, and was on the 2002 and 2006 World Cup squads.
From left: Balboa, Bravo, Henderson and Spencer.

Stuff. The Rapids' Team Store is on the West Stand, behind Section 127. In addition, Altitude Athletics has a store located in the Grand Atrium at the Pepsi Center arena's west end. It sells merchandise for the Rapids, as well as the teams that call the arena home: The NHL's Colorado Avalanche, the NBA's Denver Nuggets, and the Arena Football League's Colorado Mammoths. These stores may sell cowboy hats with team logos on them, to tie in with the State's Western heritage.

Despite being a charter MLS franchise now celebrating its 20th Anniversary, and with a title to their credit, the Rapids have no books or team videos telling their official (or even unofficial) story. Maybe on their 25th, they'll produce them.

During the Game. Coloradans love their sports, but they’re not known as antagonistic. Although the Jets came within a half of derailing a Bronco Super Bowl in 1999 (1998 season), and the Devils came within a game of short-circuiting their Stanley Cup run in 2001, the people of the Centennial State don’t have an ingrained hatred of New Yorkers, despite the 2006 brawl between the Knicks and the Nuggets at Madison Square Garden.

Rapids fans will be fine, especially seeing as how the Red Bulls aren't regional rivals Real Salt Lake or Sporting Kansas City, or the L.A. Galaxy. As long as you don’t wear Kansas City Chiefs or Oakland Raiders gear, you’ll probably be completely safe. (But, as always, watch out for obnoxious drunks, who know no State Lines.)

Three separate supporters groups -- the Pid Army, Class VI and the Bulldog Supporters Group -- united in 2013 to form a single Rapids' supporters group, Centennial 38, named for Colorado's entry into the Union as the 38th State in the Centennial year of 1876. They sit in the South End, and are known for their Colorado State Flags and their graffiti-inspired tifo.
Like Manchester United and Tottenham Hotspur, they have adapted "The Battle Hymn of the Republic," and sing, "Glory, Glory, Colorado!" And like many an English team, they've adapted Doris Day's "Que Sera Sera" to taunt their rivals:

When I was just a little boy
I asked my mother what will I be?
Will I be Rapids
or be Salt Lake
Here's what she said to me:

Wash out your mouth, my son
and go get your father's gun
and shoot the Salt Lake Scum
shoot the Salt Lake Scum

Here's one I like, another adaptation of an English hooligan song, to the tune of "Seasons In the Sun" by Terry Jacks:

We had joy, we had fun
we had Salt Lake on the run
but the joy didn't last
'cause the bastards ran too fast!

And they've adapted another English standby, "Ten Men Went to Mow (Went to Mow a Meadow)":

One man went to war! (War!)
Went to war with Salt Lake! (Scum!)
One man and his baseball bat
went to war with Salt Lake!

It's all in good fun. There is no record of a brawl between Colorado and Salt Lake supporters -- which is no longer the case between the Red Bulls and any of their regional rivals, thanks to the idiots at Man City NYC.

The Rapids do not have a regular National Anthem singer, instead accepting auditions. They have not 1, not 2, not 3, but 4 mascots, all representatives of animals naturally found in the adjoining Rocky Mountain Arsenal National Wildlife Refuge: Edson the Eagle (named for Edson Arantes do Nascimento, a.k.a. Pelé, and wearing the great man's Number 10), Marco Van Bison (named for Marco Van Basten and wearing his Number 9), Franz the Fox (named for Franz Beckenbauer and wearing his Number 5), and Jorge El Mapache, a racoon wearing a Number 1 goalkeeper's shirt.

After the Game. As long as you don't antagonize anyone, you should be safe. To be sure, the Rapids state on their website, "After the game, visiting supporters are encouraged to stay in their seats until the bowl clears out. Once the bowl is cleared out please exit the stadium via gate 'A.'"

If you're looking for a place to get a postgame meal, you'll have to get back downtown: Commerce City is mostly residential, and there's no restaurants or bars within walking distance. The Rapids are one of several MLS teams that fell into the stereotype trap that American soccer fans are suburbanites, and thus made the same mistake that teams in our other sports made in the 1950s, '60s and '70s: Abandoned the cities for the suburbs, and watched their attendance rise at first, then plateau, and finally rise again after building downtown stadiums/arenas. Considering how expensive it is to build stadiums now, don't expect a new, more convenient stadium for the Rapids anytime soon.

Denver has had crime issues, and just 3 blocks from Coors Field is Larimer Street, immortalized as a dingy, bohemian-tinged, hobo-strewn street in Jack Kerouac’s novel On the Road. But that scene was written in 1947. oDo (Lower Downtown) has become, with the building of Coors Field and the revitalization of Union Station, a sort of mountain Wrigleyville, and thus the go-to area for Denver nightlife. So you’ll probably be safe.

Across Chopper Circle from the Nuggets/Avalanche arena is Brooklyn's at the Pepsi Center, a typical sports bar. If you want something a little more substantial, a Panda Express is on the other side of the arena, across Elitch Circle.

LoDo is loaded with bars that will be open after the game, including Scruffy Murphy’s at Larimer & 20th, and an outlet of the Fado Irish Pub chain at Wynkoop & 19th. The Sports Column, at 1930 Blake Street, 2 blocks from the ballpark, was rated as the best sports bar in Colorado in a recent Thrillist article. The only baseball-named place I can find anywhere near Coors is Sandlot Brewery, at 22nd & Blake, outside the park’s right-field corner.

Perhaps the most famous sports-themed restaurant near Denver is Elway’s Cherry Creek, a steakhouse at 2500 E. 1st Avenue in the southern suburb of Cherry Creek. Bus 83L. It’s owned by the same guy who owns John Elway Chevrolet in another southern suburb, Englewood.

About a mile southeast of Coors Field, at 538 E. 17th Avenue in the Uptown neighborhood (not sure why a southern, rather than northern, neighborhood is called “Uptown”), is The Tavern, home of the local New York Giants fan club. Jet fans gather at Chopper’s Sports Grill, possibly named for Chopper Travaglini, at 80 S. Madison Street at Bayaud Avenue, 3 miles southeast of downtown, in the Pulaski Park neighborhood. Bus 83, then a mile’s walk.

Since this game is on a Saturday night, it won't interfere with your viewing preferences if you're a fan of a European soccer team:

* Arsenal, Everton, Newcastle: Three Lions, 2239 East Colfax Avenue. Number 15 bus from downtown.

* Chelsea, Manchester City: The British Bulldog, 2052 Stout Street. Downtown.

* Liverpool: The Abbey Tavern, 5151 E. Colfax. Also Number 15 bus.

* Tottenham Hotspur: Esters Neighborhood Pub, 1950 South Holly Street. Number 15 Bus to Colfax & Monaco, then transfer to Number 65 bus.

If you don't see your club listed, your best bet is to try the Three Lions.

Sidelights. Sports Authority Field at Mile High, formerly Invesco Field at Mile High, has been the home of the NFL's Denver Broncos since 2001. Everyone just gives it the same name as the old facility: "Mile High Stadium." It includes the Colorado Sports Hall of Fame, and the Broncos’ Ring of Fame.

It was built on the site of the McNichols Sports Arena, home to the NBA’s Denver Nuggets from 1975 to 1999, the NHL’s Colorado Avalanche from 1995 to 1999, and the first major league team called the Colorado Rockies, the NHL team that became the Devils, from 1976 to 1982. The Denver Dynamite played there from 1987 to 1991, made the Arena Football League Playoffs every season, and won the 1st ArenaBowl in 1987. But the cost of running the team was too high, and it folded.

It hosted the NCAA Final Four in 1990, with UNLV (the University of Nevada at Las Vegas) clobbering Duke. (The University of Colorado, in Boulder, made the Final Four in 1942 and 1955, although it wasn't yet called the Final Four.  No other Colorado-based school has made it, and none has won a National Championship -- not in basketball, anyway.)

When the time came to play the final concert at McNichols, the act that played the first concert there was brought back: ZZ Top. This fact was mentioned on a Monday Night Football broadcast, leading Dan Dierdorf to note the alphabetic distinction of the long red-bearded men, and say, “The first one should have been ABBA.” Which would have been possible, as they were nearly big in the U.S. at the time. However, the fact that the arena only lasted 24 years, making it not that hard for the act that played the first concert there to also play the last, says something about America's disposable culture.

The old stadium was just to the north of the new stadium/old arena. The current address is Mile High Stadium Circle, but the old intersection was W. 20th Avenue & Bryant St. (2755 W. 17th Avenue was the mailing address.) It was built in 1948 as Bears Stadium, an 18,000-seat ballpark.

When the American Football League was founded in 1960, it was expanded to 34,000 seats with the addition of outfield seating. The name was changed to Mile High Stadium in 1966, and by 1968 much of the stadium was triple-decked and seated 51,706. In 1977 – just in time for the Broncos to make their first Super Bowl run and start “Broncomania” – the former baseball park was transformed into a 76,273-seat horseshoe, whose east stands could be moved in to conform to the shape of a football field, or out to allow enough room for a regulation baseball field. The old-time ballpark had become, by the standards of the time, a modern football stadium.

The biggest complaint when the Rockies arrived in 1993 wasn’t the thin air, or the condition of the stadium (despite its age, it was not falling apart), but the positioning of the lights: Great for football fans, but terrible for outfielders tracking fly balls. But it was only meant to be a temporary ballpark for the Rockies, as a condition for Denver getting a team was a baseball-only stadium. What really led to the replacement of Mile High Stadium, and its demolition in 2002, was greed: The Broncos' desire for luxury-box revenue.

At Bears/Mile High Stadium, the Broncos won AFC Championships in 1977, 1986, 1987, 1989, 1997 and 1998, winning the Super Bowl in the last 2 years after losing the first 4 in blowouts.  (They've now won an AFC title at the new stadium, but not a Super Bowl.) The Denver Bears won Pennants while playing there in 1957 (as a Yankee farm team), 1971, 1976, 1977, 1981, 1983 and 1991 (winning the last one under the Denver Zephyrs name).

The old stadium also hosted the Denver Gold of the United States Football League, the Colorado Caribous of the original North American Soccer League, and the Rapids from their 1996 inception until 2001 -- in fact, they played the stadium's last event, before playing at the new stadium from 2002 to 2006. The U.S. national soccer team played a pair of games at Mile High Stadium in the 1990s, and beat Mexico at the new stadium in 2002 (the only game they've played there so far).

While the 2008 Democratic Convention was held at the Pepsi Center, Senator Barack Obama gave his nomination acceptance speech outdoors in front of 80,000 people at New Mile High Stadium.

The Red Lion Hotel Denver and the Skybox Grill & Sports Bar are now on the site of the old stadium. At McNichols, the Nuggets reached the ABA Finals in 1976, and the Avalanche won the 1996 Stanley Cup (albeit clinching in Miami). Elvis Presley sang at McNichols on April 23, 1976.

The new stadium, and the site of the old stadium and arena, are at Mile High Station on the light rail C-Line and E-Line.

Coors Field has been home to the Rockies since it opened in 1995. 2001 Blake Street (hence the team's nickname, the Blake Street Bombers) at 20th Street, 3 blocks from Union Station, accessible by light rail.

The Nuggets, known as the Denver Rockets until 1974, played at the Denver Auditorium Arena, at 13th & Champa Streets, from their 1967 inception until McNichols opened in 1975. It was also the home of the original Nuggets, who played in the NBA from 1948 to 1950.

It opened in 1908, and its seating capacity of 12,500 made it the 2nd-largest in the country at the time, behind the version of Madison Square Garden then standing. It almost immediately hosted the Democratic National Convention that nominated William Jennings Bryan for President for the 3rd time – although it’s probably just a coincidence that the Democrats waited exactly 100 years (give or take a few weeks) to go back (it’s not like Obama didn’t want to get it right the 1st time, as opposed 0-for-3 Bryan).

The Auditorium Arena hosted Led Zeppelin’s 1st American concert on December 26, 1968. It was demolished in 1990 to make way for the Denver Performing Arts Complex, a.k.a. the Denver Center. Theatre District/Convention Center Station on the light rail’s D-Line, F-Line and H-Line.

The Pepsi Center is across Cherry Creek from downtown, about 2 miles northwest of City Hall. The intersection is 11th Street & Auraria Parkway, but the mailing address is 1000 Chopper Circle, in honor of Robert "Chopper" Travaglini, the beloved former trainer (and amateur sports psychologist) of the Nuggets, who share the arena with the NHL's Colorado Avalanche. It is 1 of 10 current arenas that is home to both an NBA team and an NHL team.

Chopper was actually a Jersey Boy, albeit from Woodbury on the Philly side. He died in 1999, age 77, right before the new arena opened. Chopper Circle is an extension of Wewatta Street.

Pepsi Center/Elitch Gardens station on the RTD light rail. If you're coming in that way, you'll probably enter from the west gate, the Grand Atrium. If you're driving, parking starts at just $5.00. The rink is laid out east-to-west, and the Avs attack twice toward the east end.

In addition to hosting the Avs and the Nugs, the Pepsi Center has also hosted NCAA Tournament basketball games, the NCAA's hockey "Frozen Four," and the 2008 Democratic National Convention.

The Beatles played Red Rocks Amphitheatre in suburban Morrison on August 26, 1964. It is still in business, and a Colorado Music Hall of Fame is a short walk away. 18300 W. Alameda Parkway, 10 miles west of downtown. Sorry, no public transportation.

Elvis played 2 shows at the Denver Coliseum on April 8, 1956, and 1 each on November 17, 1970 and April 30, 1973. Built in 1951, it still stands, seating 10,500, and is best known for concerts and the National Western Stock Rodeo. 4600 Humbolt Street at E. 46th Avenue, off Interstate 70, 3 miles northeast of downtown. Apparently, no public transportation to there, either.

Denver has some renowned museums, including the Denver Museum of Nature & Science (their version of the Museum of Natural History) at 2001 Colorado Blvd. at Montview Blvd. (in City Park, Number 20 bus), and the Denver Art Museum (their version of the Metropolitan Museum of Natural History), at 100 W. 14th Avenue Parkway at Colfax Avenue (across I-25 from Mile High Stadium, Auraria West station on the C-Line and E-Line).

Denver’s history only goes back to a gold rush in 1859 – not to be confused with the 1849 one that turned San Francisco from a Spanish Catholic mission into the first modern city in the American West. The city isn’t exactly loaded with history.

There’s no Presidential Library – although Mamie Doud, the eventual Mrs. Dwight D. Eisenhower, grew up there, and her house is now a historic site. Mamie and “Ike” were married there, their son John (a future General, Ambassador and military historian) was born there, and the Eisenhowers were staying there when Ike had his heart attack in 1955. The house is still in private ownership, and is not open to the public. However, if you’re a history buff, or if you just like Ike, and want to see it, it’s at 750 Lafayette Street, at 8th Avenue. The Number 6 bus will get you to 6th & Lafayette.

After his heart attack, Ike was treated at Fitzsimmons Army Medical Center in nearby Aurora, 12 years after Senator John Kerry, nearly elected President in 2004 and now Secretary of State, was born there. It’s not a Presidential Birthplace, because Kerry narrowly lost. It is now the University of Colorado Hospital. The Fitzsimmons Golf Course is across Montview Boulevard – it figures that Ike would be hospitalized next to a golf course! 16th Avenue & Quentin Street. Number 20 bus from downtown.

The University of Denver’s Newman Center for the Performing Arts hosted a 2012 Presidential Debate between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney. 2344 East Iliff Avenue, about 5 miles south of downtown. H Line light rail to University of Denver Station.

Denver doesn't have as many tall buildings as the nation's bigger cities, nor are they as interesting, architecturally. The tallest building in the State of Colorado is Republic Plaza, 714 feet high, at 17th Street & Tremont Place downtown.

The University of Colorado is in Boulder, 30 miles to the northwest. At Market Street Station, 16th & Market, take the BV Bus to the Boulder Transit Center, which is on campus. The ride should take about an hour and 20 minutes. Colorado State University is in Fort Collins, 65 miles up Interstate 25 north, and forget about reaching it by public transportation. The U.S. Air Force Academy is outside Colorado Springs, 60 miles down I-25. As with Fort Collins, you'd need Greyhound. Unlike CSU, you might not be able to just go there: Some of the area is restricted.  It is, after all, a military base.

A few TV shows have been set in Denver, but you won't find their filming locations there. The old-time Western Whispering Smith and the more recent one Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman were set in old Colorado, but filmed in Southern California.

Probably the most famous show set in Colorado is South Park, and that's a cartoon, so forget seeing anything from that. Not quite as cartoonish was Mork & Mindy, set in Boulder. The McConnell house actually is in Boulder, at 1619 Pine Street. But don't try to copy the opening-sequence scene with Robin Williams and Pam Dawber on the goalposts at the University of Colorado's Folsom Field. You could fall, and end up saying, "Shazbot!"

The most famous show ever set in Colorado was Dynasty, ABC's Excessive Eighties counterpart to CBS' Dallas, starring John Forsythe as Blake Carrington, an oilman and a thinly-veiled version of Marvin Davis, who nearly bought the Oakland Athletics from Charlie Finley in 1978 with the idea of moving them to Mile High Stadium, but the deal fell through. Right, you don't care about Blake, all you care about is the catfights between the 2nd and 1st Mrs. Carrington's: Krystle (Linda Evans) and Alexis (Joan Collins). The Carrington mansion seen in the opening credits is in Beverly Hills, but the building that stood in for the headquarters of Denver Carrington is at 621 17th Street, while the one that stood in for Colbyco is at 1801 California Street.

*

Like the Red Bulls, the Colorado Rapids are a charter MLS franchise now celebrating their 20th Anniversary. It could be a fun roadtrip, especially if you have a car and take it from anywhere in or around Denver to the suburban stadium.

Ed Snider, 1933-2016

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I was working on my Trip Guide for the 2016 edition of "How to Be a Met Fan In Philadelphia," when a bigger Philadelphia story hit the wires.

No, not the basketball team at Villanova University winning the National Championship, as big as that was, particularly with them having avoided talk of their massive choke against North Carolina by winning on a buzzer-beater anyway.

Props to Ed Snider for living as long as he did, and for supporting a great city, and for never calling himself "Duke Snider."

*

Edward Malcolm Snider was born on January 6, 1933 in Washington, D.C. He graduated from the University of Maryland, ran a record company, and, in 1964, along with his brother-in-law Earl Foreman, a lawyer, and their friend Jerry Wolman, a trucking company head, bought the NFL's Philadelphia Eagles.

Shortly thereafter, the National Hockey League decided to expand beyond the 6 teams it had settled on since 1942: The Montreal Canadiens, the Toronto Maple Leafs, the New York Rangers, the Boston Bruins, the Detroit Red Wings and the Chicago Blackhawks.

Snider thought Philadelphia should get one of the new teams, and began planning a new arena, for both this hockey team and the NBA's Philadelphia 76ers, who were then playing at the Convention Hall of the Philadelphia Civic Center, adjacent to the campus of the University of Pennsylvania.

On February 8, 1966, Snider got his wish: The NHL granted him a conditional franchise. On June 5, 1967, the Philadelphia Flyers were officially admitted to the NHL, along with the Pittsburgh Penguins, the Minnesota North Stars, the St. Louis Blues, the Los Angeles Kings, and an Oakland-based team then named the California Seals.

On September 30, 1967, The Spectrum opened, hosting not a hockey game, not a basketball game, but a concert: The Quaker City Jazz Festival. (While there were certainly men older than he was promoting rock music, Ed Snider, then 34 years old, was not a rock and roll fan.)

On October 11, 1967, the Flyers made their regular-season debut, losing to the Seals 5-1 at the Oakland Coliseum Arena. On October 18, 1967, the defending NBA Champion 76ers made their Spectrum debut, beating the Los Angeles Lakers 103-87. The next day, October 19, 1967, the Flyers made their home debut, beating the Pittsburgh Penguins 1-0.

The NHL put all 6 expansion teams in the Western Division, and the Flyers won it. But they struggled after that, until the 1971-72 season, in which they developed their rough-and-tumble, sometimes dirty, image as the Broad Street Bullies. The following season, Captain Bobby Clarke developed into the NHL MVP.

Starting on December 11, 1969, Snider had used a record of Kate Smith singing "God Bless America" before selected games, in place of the actual National Anthem, "The Star-Spangled Banner," and it nearly always worked. For October 11, 1973, the opener of what became an epic season, Snider invited Smith, a fellow Washington, D.C. native, to sing it in person. She was 67 years old and had not been a hockey fan before, but she did it, it worked again (the Flyers beat the Maple Leafs 2-0), and she loved it.

The Flyers reached the Stanley Cup Finals, and Clarke's overtime goal beat the Boston Bruins in Game 2 at the Boston Garden, a place where the Flyers had only won once before. On May 19, 1974, before Game 6 of the Stanley Cup Finals against the Boston Bruins at The Spectrum, Smith sang "God Bless America" live again. As a classy gesture, but also possibly as jinx protection, Bruin superstars Bobby Orr and Phil Esposito skated up to her, and gave her a bouquet of flowers. It didn't work: Rick MacLeish's tip-in gave the Flyers a 1-0 win, and they became the 1st of the expansion teams to win the Stanley Cup, the 1st aside from the "Original Six" to do so since the Montreal Maroons 39 years earlier, beating the Boston Bruins in 6 games. The win made the Flyers 37-3-1 when Smith sang or her recording was played.

The Flyers repeated as Champions in 1975, clinching in Game 6 in Buffalo against the Sabres. In 1976, the Flyers were the only NHL team to defeat the Soviet Union's Central Red Army team on its North American tour. Perhaps "beat" is a better term: Ed Van Impe, one of the dirtiest of the Broad Street Bullies, high-sticked Valery Kharlamov, the Red Army's best offensive player, and coach Viktor Tikhonov took his team off the ice. Snider told the Soviet general manager that if his team didn't play, they wouldn't be paid. They became capitalists real fast: The game was resumed, and the Flyers won.

The Flyers made it 3 straight trips to the Stanley Cup Finals, and the slogan became "Hat Trick in '76." But the Montreal Canadiens were ready to start a dynasty of their own, and they swept the Flyers in 4 straight, beginning a run of 4 straight Cups. The Flyers have never won another Cup: They are 0-6 in Finals since 1975, losing to the Habs in 1976, the New York Islanders in 1980, the Edmonton Oilers in 1985 and 1987, the Detroit Red Wings in 1997, and the Chicago Blackhawks in 2010.

They also infamously lost to the New Jersey Devils in the 1995 Eastern Conference Finals thanks to Claude Lemieux's 65-foot wobbler goal in the last minute of Game 5 at The Spectrum in 1995, and blew a 3-games-to-1 lead over the Devils in the 2000 Conference Finals, losing Games 5 and 7 at the new arena, with Scott Stevens leveling Eric Lindros in Game 7. The Flyers were a 1st seed in 2002, and lost to the 8th seed, the Ottawa Senators.

It has now been 42 years since the Flyers went all the way. Being Jewish, Snider knew that even the ancient Israelites got out of the wilderness after 40 years. Even Connie Mack, who broke up the Athletics during the Great Depression, and whose A's were then so bad for so long, only lasted 24 years as a Philadelphia sports team owner since his last World Championship.

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Snider assumed control of The Spectrum in 1971, and in 1974, he founded Spectacor, as a holding company to run the business affairs of both the Flyers and The Spectrum. In 1996, shortly after selling a majority stake in Spectacor to Comcast, a new arena opened, not because The Spectrum was (yet) considered inadequate to changing times, but because it was overbooked: It was the busiest arena in the country. The new arena has gone through 5 different names, as one bank with naming rights has been bought out by another, and is now known as the Wells Fargo Center.

The 76ers played their last game at The Spectrum on April 19, 1996, losing 112-92 to the Orlando Magic. The Flyers played their Spectrum finale on May 12, 1996, losing Game 5 of the Eastern Conference Finals to the Florida Panthers, 2-1 in overtime. The Flyers made their debut at the new arena on October 5, 1996, losing 3-1 to the Panthers. The 76ers did so on November 1, losing 111-103 to the Milwaukee Bucks.

Today, Comcast Spectacor owns several sports venues. Just within a reasonable drive of Center City Philadelphia, it owns the followers: The Wells Fargo Center, Temple University's Liacouras Center, Talen Energy Stadium in Chester (home of MLS' Philadelphia Union), the Sun National Bank Center in Trenton, Atlantic City's Boardwalk Hall (formerly Convention Hall) and the Atlantic City Convention Center, and the PPL Center in Allentown. It also owns and runs University of Phoenix Stadium in  (home of the Arizona Cardinals), Children's Mercy Park in Kansas City, Kansas (home of MLS' Sporting Kansas City), the XL Center (formerly known as the Hartford Civic Center), AutoZone Park in Memphis, and the home courts of the basketball teams of Ohio State, Cleveland State, the University of Massachusetts, the University of Central Florida, the University of Miami and Saint Louis University. It also owns the companies that do the ticket operations and the concessions for all these venues. And it owns the Borgata Hotel Casino and Spa in Atlantic City.

As the Flyers and Sixers were transitioning to the new arena in 1996, Spectacor bought the Sixers, for whom Snider had been landlord. He was now their owner, and remained so until selling Comcast Spectacor's share in them to Joshua Harris in 2011. The Sixers reached the NBA Finals under Snider's ownership in 2001, but lost to the Lakers, and haven't won an NBA title since 1983.

Snider also founded Comcast SportsNet, which broadcasts most of the Flyers', 76ers' and Phillies' games.

He wasn't all good -- and I'm not just talking about the Flyers and their on-ice, sometimes in-stands behavior. In 1985, Snider was one of the founding contributors of the Ayn Rand Institute, established to promote Rand's philosophy of Objectivism -- essentially, enlightened selfishness. (Newsflash: Selfishness is inherently unenlightened.) In 1990, a split in the ARI led to a new organization, now known as The Atlas Society, and Snider was again a founding member.

He was elected to the Hockey Hall of Fame and the Philadelphia Sports Hall of Fame. He was married 4 times, had 6 children (one of whom, Jay, had helped him run the Flyers, but no longer does), and lived to see 15 grandchildren.

Ed Snider had been battling cancer for 2 years, and thought he had beaten it last year, but it returned, and he died this morning, at the age of 83.

Although Barron Hilton, founding owner of the San Diego Chargers (and grandfather of Paris Hilton) is still alive (at 88, he is the last surviving member of "The Foolish Club," the 8 men who founded the American Football League in 1959), with Snider's death, the longest continuously-operating current owner of an NHL team is now Jeremy Jacobs, who has run the Bruins through his Delaware North Corporation since 1975. (Bill Bidwill, part-owner of the NFL's St. Louis/Arizona Cardinals since 1962 and sole owner since 1972, was already the longest-tenured owner in all of North American major league sports.)

Living Former Philadelphia Athletics & 1950 Phillies "Whiz Kids"

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September 19, 1954: The Philadelphia Athletics play their last home game, at Connie Mack Stadium (formerly Shibe Park). They lost 4-2 to the Yankees. They close their season with 3 games in Boston and 3 in New York.

April 12, 1955: The Kansas City Athletics play their 1st home game, at Kansas City Municipal Stadium. They beat the Detroit Tigers 6-2.

The last active player who had played for the Philadelphia Athletics was Vic Power, who lasted until 1965. The last one who had played for the Kansas City Athletics? My man, Reggie Jackson, who lasted until 1987.

There are 20 living former Philadelphia Athletics, the youngest of whom is 83 years old. They are:

* Carl Miles, 98, from northern Missouri. A pitcher, his entire career consists of 2 appearances for the 1940 A's.

* Fred Caligiuri, 97, from Western Pennsylvania. A pitcher, he was a September callup for the A's in 1941 (5 games) and 1942  (13 games), and never appeared in the majors otherwise.

* George Yankowski, 93, from the Boston suburbs. A catcher, he appeared in 6 games for the A's in 1942, and 12 for the Chicago White Sox in 1946, his career interrupted by World War II.

* Bill Mills, 96, from Boston. A catcher, his entire major league career consisted of 4 appearances for the 1944 A's.

* Dick Adams, 96, from California's Sierra Nevada region. A 1st baseman, he played 37 games in the major leagues, all with the 1947 A's.

* Billy DeMars, 90, from Brooklyn. A shortstop, he was with the A's for 18 games in 1948. He is also a surviving St. Louis Brown, appearing in 61 games for them in 1950 and 1 in 1951. He remained with their organization as they became the Baltimore Orioles. He won the 1964 Midwest League Pennant, managing the Fox Cities Foxes. He was a coach on the 1980 World Champion Philadelphia Phillies.

This leaves only 6 living men who had played for Connie Mack as Philadelphia Athletics manager.

* Ed Samcoff, 91, from Sacramento. A 2nd baseman, his entire career consisted of 6 games with the A's in April 1951.

* Eddie Robinson, 95, from Paris, Texas. Played in the majors from 1942 to 1957, including 1953 with the A's. The last survivor of the Cleveland Indians' 1948 World Champions, and oldest living ex-Yankee, playing in the 1955 World Series.

* Neal Watlington. A catcher, he made 21 appearances for the A's in 1953.

* Tommy Giordano, 90, from Newark. A 2nd baseman, his only big-league experience was in 11 games as a September callup in 1953.

* Ozzie Van Brabant, 89, from near Windsor, Ontario and Detroit. A pitcher, he made 9 appearances for the A's in Philly in 1954, and 2 for them in K.C. in 1955. They were the extent of his big-league experience.

* Carl Scheib, 89, from the Harrisburg area. A pitcher, he had a 45-65 record from 1943 to 1954, all with the A's except for the end, with the St. Louis Cardinals.

* Bill Oster, 83, from Manhattan. A pitcher, he was a late-season callup in 1954, and didn't appear in the majors again after the move.

* Jim Robertson, 88, from Chicago. A catcher, he was a barely-appearing backup in 1954 and 1955, on either side of the move.

* Bill Wilson, 87, from central Nebraska. A center fielder, the A's picked him up in 1954, he made the move with them, and he hit the 1st home run in Kansas City Athletics history on Opening Day 1955. But that was his last year in the major leagues.

* Art Ditmar, 87, from the Boston suburbs. A pitcher, he came up to the A's in 1954, moved with them, and was sent to the Yankees along with Bobby Shantz in 1957. He won Pennants with the Yankees in 1857, 1958 and 1960, and has a 1958 World Series ring. Traded back to the A's, he finished his career in Kansas City in 1962.

* Bobby Shantz, 90, from nearby Pottstown. A pitcher, he was the longest-lasting and most accomplished player on this list. He was with the A's from 1949 to 1956, including on either side of the move. The 5-foot-6 "little lefty" was a 3-time All-Star, and in 1952 he went 24-7 for a mediocre A's team, earning him the American League's Most Valuable Player award.

An injury late that season robbed him of his speed, but he was converted to a reliever. He pitched for the Yankees in the 1957, 1958 and 1960 World Series, winning it in 1958. When the Gold Glove Award was founded in 1957, he won it 8 straight times. In 1962, he was an original member of the Houston Colt .45's. (They changed their name to the Astros in 1965.)

In 1964, he was sent by the St. Louis Cardinals to the Chicago Cubs as part of the Ernie Broglio for Lou Brock deal. The Cubs then sent him back home, to the Philadelphia Phillies, where he closed his career with that ill-fated team (although the infamous Phillie Phlop was hardly his fault). He then retired with a career record of 119-99. He is the only surviving A's player who is a member of the Philadelphia Baseball Wall of Fame.

* Bill Harrington, 88, from Sanford, North Carolina. A pitcher, he was with the A's from 1953 to 1957, including the move, and no other teams.

* Hal Raether, 83, from southern Wisconsin. A pitcher, he made 2 appearances, both for the A's, 1 in Philly in 1954, 1 in K.C. in 1957.

* Joe DeMaestri, 87, from San Francisco. A shortstop, and like DeMars a surviving former St. Louis Brown, "Froggy" played for the A's from 1953 through 1959, including the move. He was an All-Star in 1957. He was a throw-in in the trade that brought Roger Maris to the Yankees. He was sent in to replace Tony Kubek after his injury in Game 7 of the 1960 World Series, and his last major league appearance was on the next year's Series, winning a 1961 World Series ring.

*

For comparison's sake, there are only 4 members of the Phillies' 1950 National League Pennant winners, "the Whiz Kids," are still alive, 66 years later:

* Ralph "Putsy" Caballero, 88, from New Orleans. An infielder, he was with the Phillies from 1944 to 1952, but could never win the starting job at 3rd base from Del Ennis or at 2nd base from Mike Goliat. He is, however, the last surviving Phils player who appeared in the Pennant clincher of October 1, 1950 against the Brooklyn Dodgers, won by Dick Sisler's 10th inning home run.

* Bob Miller, 89, from Detroit. A pitcher, he spent his entire career with the Phillies, from 1949 to 1958, with a record of 42-42. He coached the University of Detroit Mercy baseball team from 1965 to 2000, winning nearly 900 games. He should not be confused with either of the 2 Bob Millers who roomed together on the famously bad 1962 Mets, and each answered the phone by saying, "Hello,
Bob Miller here."

* Paul Stuffel, 89, from Canton, Ohio. A pitcher, he was called up to the Phils in September 1950, too late to make the World Series roster. He also appeared for the Phils in 1952 and 1953, but that was it for his major league career.

* Curt Simmons, 86, from Egypt and Whitehall, Pennsylvania. A pitcher, he was drafted into the Korean War in September 1950, nearly costing the Phils the Pennant, and he could have made a difference in the World Series against the Yankees. He was with the Phillies from 1947 to 1960. He finally got to appear in a World Series in 1964, ironically at the expense of the Phillies -- and, in said World Series, at the expense of the Yankees. He finished his career with a record of 193-183. He is a member of the Philadelphia Baseball Wall of Fame.
*

On June 6, 2003, the Interleague schedule finally allowed the now-Oakland Athletics to make their 1st appearance in Philadelphia since leaving town, 49 years earlier. They came to Veterans Stadium, and the Phillies invited every living former Philadelphia Athletic. A few showed up, including Bobby Shantz, Eddie Robinson and Carl Scheib. Also attending, but now deceased, were Guz Zernial, Eddie Joost, Joe Astroth and Pete Suder.

Robin Roberts, Hall of Fame pitcher for the Phillies, including their 1950 Pennant season, was also on hand that night, signing copies of his book My Life In Baseball. (He had previously written a book titled The Whiz Kids and the 1950 Pennant. He was universally hailed as a great guy, but was much better at pitching than he was at picking book titles.) He has since died.

A crowd of 29,583, including myself, saw the A's beat the Phils 7-4. It was small consolation for anyone old enough to remember the A's, and to know that, not only had the A's won more in Philly before the move (9 Pennants to 2, 5 World Championships to 0), but had won more since the move (6 Pennants to 3, now 6 to 5, and 4 World Championships to 1, now 4 to 2, and, even at their worst, the Oakland A's have never had a collapse like 1964 or heartbreaking postseason moments like 1977 and 1993).

Although how each family managed its money meant that the Carpenters, who bought the Phillies in 1943, would be the team that stayed, and the Macks, who owned the A's, would have to be the team that left, Mitchell Nathanson suggested in his book The Fall of the 1977 Phillies: How a Baseball Team's Collapse Sank a City's Spirit that, for reasons competitive and cultural, the wrong team moved away. In spite of the Phillies' passionate fan base, their nice new fan-friendly ballpark, and their 2007-11 golden age, he may have had a point.

Sabathia Rehabs Self, Yanks; Mets' Moment Over

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Toward the end of last season, CC Sabathia left the Yankees, and checked him self into rehab for alcoholism. It didn't make a difference as far as the American League Wild Card game went: Masahiro Tanaka was the ace last season, and if he able to pitch that game, he was going to pitch it, and he did. Whether CC's absence would have made a difference had the Yankees gone on to the AL Division Series and beyond, we'll never know.

Because of a scheduled day off yesterday, and a rainout the day before, the Yankees' most recent game was last Saturday, at Comerica Park, against the Detroit Tigers, who came into the game undefeated at 3-0.

CC made his 1st start for the Yankees since his rehab. After 4 games, split evenly, 2-2, with no Yankee starter having finished 6 innings, and with the gametime temperature being 31 degrees, the coldest in Comerica Park's 16-year history, a lot of people were worried that the Big Fella, known as an eater of innings (among other things), but now within 3 months of his 36th birthday, would also not last long.

But he did. He went 6 innings, allowing 3 runs on 4 hits and 4 walks, plus 3 strikeouts. He pitched to a batter in the 7th before Joe Girardi replaced him with Kirby Yates, who allowed a 4th run. But Chasen Shreve, Dellin Betances and Andrew Miller went the last 2 1/3rd innings, allowing only 1 baserunner.

In contrast, the Yankee bats, which had been as cold as the weather on Friday afternoon, heated up. In the 1st inning, Alex Rodriguez took former Met Mike Pelfrey deep for his 1st home run of the season, the 688th of his career. Didi Gregorius brought home runs in the 2nd with a single and the 4th with a sacrifice fly. Jacoby Ellsbury tripled home 2 runs in the 4th. Carlos Beltran capped the Yankee scoring (of course he did, he wasn't batting with 2 out in the bottom of the 9th, down by a run, with a man on base) when he hit a 2-run homer in the 5th, his 394th career dinger.

Yankees 8, Tigers 4. WP: Sabathia (1-0 -- Thank you, Big Man). No save. LP: Pelfrey (0-1). Escaping from Detroit with a split isn't bad at all, especially given the Yankees' record there since the Tigers left Tiger Stadium in the ghetto for Comerica Park downtown.

*

Tonight, the Yankees start a 3-game series in Toronto against those pesky Blue Jays, who, for the 1st time since 1994 (or 1995, if you consider the '94 Division title to have been unawarded), are defending American League Eastern Division Champions. All 3 games have an official starting time of 7:07 PM. Here are the scheduled starting pitchers:

* Tonight: Masahiro Tanaka vs. Aaron Sanchez.

* Tomorrow: Michael Pineda vs. J.A. Happ.

* Thursday: Nathan Eovaldi vs. Marcus Stroman.

Then the Yankees come home, and begin a series against the Seattle Mariners. Friday is April 15, Jackie Robinson Day, when the universal retirement of Jackie's Number 42 is reversed for a day, and every major league player wears his number, so that every person in the ballpark, and every person watching on television, must see Jackie's legacy.

Speaking of Jackie, last night, as part of its American Experience series, PBS aired Part I of the new documentary Jackie Robinson, by Ken Burns, who focused heavily on Jackie during his 1994 miniseries Baseball. It will air Part II tonight, and will repeat the series on the weekend. DVR it. I insist. It's about more than baseball: It casts some perspective on the state of American politics in the last 60 years, including our current racial debates.

By the way, has anybody noticed that the Mets are 2-4? They got beat 2 out of 3 at home by the Philadelphia Phillies, "the worst team in baseball," over the weekend. They got shut out on Saturday, and Matt Harvey got beat on Sunday. Then, last night, Steven Matz got clobbered by the Miami Marlins -- again, in Flushing.

Remember Bull Durham? These words should stick in the mind of any Met fan who wants to remind any Yankee Fan about last year's Pennant:

Nuke: Can't you just let me enjoy the moment?
Crash: Moment's over.

How to Be a Met Fan In Philadelphia -- 2016 Edition

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The Mets are going to Philadelphia to play the Phillies next week, Monday through Wednesday. "The best team in New York" (ha ha) is going to have to do better against "the worst team in baseball" than they did this past weekend, dropping 2 out of 3 at Pity Field.

Not that long ago, the Philadelphia Phillies played at Veterans Stadium, a concrete oval (officially, they called its shape an "octorad," which sounds like a made-up word), which seated 62,382 fans for baseball in its final years. Granted, about a third of these seats, 20,000 or so, were in the outfield and well back of the action. But with a few exceptions, during the regular season you could show up at the Vet’s ticket window at 7:00 at night, Monday through Saturday, or at 1:00 on a Sunday, and buy pretty much as many seats as you could afford.

It’s a different world at Citizens Bank Park, which opened in 2004. It’s not a multipurpose facility, it’s a baseball-specific stadium. Every seat has sufficient width, legroom and alignment to view a game in comfort. Behind you will be concession stands that are plentiful and varied, restrooms that are clean and not beset by noxious fumes, and no 2-inning-long lines at either. In front of you are informative and attractive scoreboards and a nice, natural-grass field, instead of the hideous lime-green carpet at the Vet. Depending on where you sit, you might even get a good view of the skyline of Center City Philadelphia.

(That turf was often called the worst playing surface in the NFL. I don’t know if it was the worst in baseball, though: Pittsburgh’s Three Rivers Stadium and Houston’s Astrodome had artificial fields that looked even worse to me.)

For the first 10 years of its existence, because “The Bank” is a nice park, and also because the Phillies were contenders pretty much since it opened, its seats went pretty quickly. That is no longer the case, as the Phils had the worst record in baseball last year.

Before You Go. Philadelphia is just down the road, so it's in the Eastern Time Zone, and you don't have to worry about fiddling with various timepieces. And the weather will be almost identical to what you'd have on the same day in New York.

Still, check the combined website for the Philadelphia newspapers, the Inquirer and the Daily News, before you head out. For the moment, it looks like temperatures in Philly will be in the low 70s in daylight, and the low 50s at night when the games will be played, so you should bring a jacket.

Tickets. Citizens Bank Park seats 43,651 fans. The Phillies averaged 23,475 last year, about 54 percent of capacity, and, as the Mets often seem to do, they may have been fudging those figures. Still, it never hurts to buy your tickets ahead of time.

Infield 100 sections will be $70, Baseline 100s will be $53, Outfield 100s will be $38, Infield 200s and 300s will be $38, Outfield 200s will be $30, Outfield 300s will be $28, Infield 400s will be $30, and Outfield 400s will be $20. Get a “Power Ticket” for an additional $10, and you’ll receive a $10 credit toward food or merchandise.

Getting There. It’s 99 miles from Times Square in Manhattan to City Hall in Center City Philadelphia, and 111 miles from Citi Field to Citizens Bank Park. (Yes, they both have names of banks slapped on them, and the names are very similar. Don’t be confused, especially since Citi’s dominant logo color is blue and Citizens Bank’s is green, although the parks’ seats reverse those colors, green in Flushing and blue in South Philly.)

This is close enough that a typical Met fan could leave his house, drive to the Citi Field parking lot, meet up with friends, head down to CBP, watch a game, head back to Citi Field, pick up his car, and drive home, all within 10 hours. But it’s also close enough that you could spend an entire day in Philadelphia, and, hopefully, you’ve already done this. Having done so many times myself, I can tell you that it’s well worth it.

If you are driving, you’ll need to get on the New Jersey Turnpike. If you’re not “doing the city,” but just going to the game, take the Turnpike’s Exit 3 to NJ Route 168, which forms part of the Black Horse Pike, to Interstate 295. (The Black Horse Pike later becomes NJ Route 42, US Route 322 and US Route 40, going into Atlantic City. Not to be confused with the White Horse Pike, US Route 30, which also terminates in A.C.)

Take I-295 to Exit 26, which will get you onto Interstate 76 and the Walt Whitman Bridge into Philly. Signs for the ballpark will soon follow, and the park is at 11th Street and Pattison Avenue.

From anywhere in New York City, allow 2½ hours for the actual drive, though from North Jersey you might need only 2, and from Central Jersey an hour and a half might suffice. But you’ll need at least another half-hour to negotiate the last mile or so, including the parking lot itself.

If you don’t want to drive, there are other options, but the best one is the train. Philadelphia is too close to fly, just as flying from New York (from JFK, LaGuardia or Newark) to Boston, Baltimore and Washington, once you factor in fooling around with everything you gotta do at each airport, doesn’t really save you much time compared to driving, the bus or the train.

And I strongly recommend not taking the bus. If you do, once you see Philadelphia’s Greyhound terminal, at 10th & Filbert Streets in Center City, the nation’s 2nd-busiest behind New York’s Port Authority Bus Terminal, you’ll say to yourself, “I never thought I’d say this to myself, but thank God for Port Authority!” The Philly terminal is a disgrace. I don’t know how many people are in Atlantic City on an average summer day, when both the beaches and the casinos are full (I'm guessing about half a million, or one-third the size of Philly), but it has a permanent population of 40,000 people, compared to the 1.6 million of Philadelphia, and it has a bus station of roughly equal size and far greater cleanliness than Philly’s.
The Art Deco front entrance is the only good thing about it.

If you do want to take Greyhound, it’s about 2 hours and 10 minutes each way, and $34 round-trip (as little as $20 on advance purchase), and buses leave Port Authority just about every hour on the hour.

If you can afford Amtrak, and that will be an even $100 round-trip, it takes about an hour and a half to get from Penn Station in Midtown Manhattan to the 30th Street Station at 30th & Market Streets, just across the Schuylkill River from Center City. Unlike the dull post-1963 Penn Station, this building is an Art Deco masterpiece from 1933, and is the former corporate headquarters of the Pennsylvania Railroad. Ironically, it never had the official name “Pennsylvania Station” or “Penn Station.” (If you can’t afford Amtrak, or if you can but you’d rather save money, I’ll get to what to do in a minute.)
The east front of 30th Street Station,
with the Cira Center in the background

From 30th Street Station, you can take a cab that will go down I-76, the Schuylkill Expressway, to I-95, the Delaware Expressway, to South Broad Street to the Sports Complex. I would advise against this, though: When I did this for a Yankees-Phillies Interleague game at the Vet in 1999, it was $15. It’s probably $25 now.

Instead, you’ll need to take the subway, which, like Philly’s commuter-rail and bus systems, is run by SEPTA, the SouthEastern Pennsylvania Transportation Authority. You might recognize their “S” logo from the film Trading Places, and the bus that hits Tommy Morrison at the end of Rocky V. You’ll have to exit 30th Street Station and cross 30th Street itself to get into the 30th St. station on the Market-Frankford Line.

Philadelphia and Toronto are the only 2 cities left on the North American continent, as far as I know, that still use tokens rather than farecards (or "MetroCards" as New York's MTA calls them) or tickets for their subways. One ride on a SEPTA subway train is $2.25, cheaper than New York's, but they don’t sell single tokens at booths. They come in packs of 2, 5 and 10, and these packs are damn hard to open. Two cost $3.60; five are $9.00, and a ten-pack costs $18.00. They are also available for bulk purchase.

From 30th Street, take the Market-Frankford Line to 15th Street (that's just one stop), where you’ll transfer to the Broad Street Line at City Hall Station. Being a Met fan, you’ll notice that the MFL’s standard color is blue, while the BSL’s is orange. Blue and orange. Don’t think that means they want to make Met fans feel at home, though.

From City Hall, if you’re lucky, you’ll get an express train that will make just 2 stops, Walnut-Locust and AT&T (formerly "Pattison" -- yes, they sold naming rights to one of their most important subway stations). But you’ll want to save your luck for the game itself, so don’t be too disappointed if you get a local, which will make 7 stops: Walnut-Locust, Lombard-South, Ellsworth-Federal, Tasker-Morris, Oregon, Snyder and AT&T. The local should take about 10 minutes, the express perhaps 7 minutes.

If you don’t want to take Amtrak, your other rail option is local. At Penn Station, you can buy a combined New Jersey Transit/SEPTA ticket to get to Center City Philadelphia. Take NJT’s Northeast Corridor Line out of Penn Station to the Trenton Transit Center. This station recently completed a renovation that has already turned it from an absolute hole (it was so bad, it made Philly’s bus station look like Grand Central) into a modern multimodal transport facility.

At Trenton, transfer to the SEPTA R7 train that will terminate at Chestnut Hill East. Because there will be a lot more stops than there are on Amtrak (especially the SEPTA part), it will take 2 hours and 40 minutes, but you’ll spend $51.50 round-trip, only a little more than what you'd spend on a same-day purchase on Greyhound, and less than half of what you’d be likely to spend on Amtrak.
Main waiting room of 30th Street Station.
You might recognize it from Trading Places.

And if you are riding NJT and SEPTA, you’ll still get to 30th Street Station, but you’ll need to bypass it and keep going to the next stop, Suburban Station at 17th Street & John F. Kennedy Blvd. (which is what Filbert Street is called west of Broad Street). Getting off there, a pedestrian concourse will lead you to the City Hall station on the Broad Street Line, and then just take that to Pattison.
A recent renovation gave the interior a much-needed cleanup,
but, like the Greyhound station, an Art Deco front entrance
is easily the best thing about this place.

The subway’s cars are fairly recent, and don’t rattle much, although they can be unpleasant on the way back from the game, especially if it’s a football game and they’re rammed with about 100 Eagles fans who’ve spent the game sweating and boozing and are still loaded for bear for anyone from outside the Delaware Valley. It’s highly unlikely anyone will give you anything more than a little bit of verbal on the subway ride into the Sports Complex, while they might give a little more gusto to the verbal on the ride back. But despite Philly sports fans’ reputation, this will not be the equivalent of the London Underground on a Saturday afternoon in the 1980s: They might tell you that your team sucks (even if your team is ahead of theirs in the standings), but that’s about the worst you’ll get.
Once In the City. Philadelphia is a Greek word meaning "brotherly love," a name given to it by its founder, William Penn, in 1683. So the city is nicknamed "The City of Brotherly Love." The actions and words of its sports fans suggest that this is ridculous. Giants coach Bill Parcells was once caught on an NFL Films production, during a game with the Eagles at the Vet, saying to Lawrence Taylor, "You know, Lawrence, they call this 'the City of Brotherly Love,' but it's really a banana republic." And Emmitt Smith, who played for that other team Eagles fans love to hate, the Dallas Cowboys, also questioned the name: "They don't got no love for no brothers."

On a map, it might look like Penn Square, surrounding City Hall, is the centerpoint, but this is just geographic, and only half-refers to addresses. Market Street is the difference between the north-south numbering on the numbered Streets. But the Delaware River is the start for the east-west streets, with Front Street taking the place of 1st Street. Broad Street, which intersects with Market at City Hall/Penn Square, takes the place of 14th Street.

In the Colonial and Revolutionary periods, Philadelphia was the largest city in America, before being overtaken by New York. As recently as 1970, it had about 2 million people. But "white flight" after the 1964 North Philadelphia riot led to the population dropping to just over 1.5 million in 2000. It has inched back upward since then. The metro area as a whole -- southeastern Pennsylvania, South Jersey and most of Delaware -- is about 7.1 million, making it the 6th-largest in the country, behind New York, Los Angeles, Chicago, San Francisco and Boston.

The sales tax is 6 percent in the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania (Massachusetts, Virginia and Kentucky are also "commowealths" in their official State names), 8 percent within the City of Philadelphia.

Going In. The Philadelphia sports complex is 3 1/2 miles south of Center City. It once included Sesquicentennial/Municipal/John F. Kennedy Stadium (1926-1992), The Spectrum (1967-2009), and Veterans Stadium (1971-2004). The arena now known as the Wells Fargo Center was built on the site of JFK Stadium. Citizens Bank Park, the new home of the Phillies, was built to the east of The Vet. And Lincoln Financial Field was built south of the new ballpark, and east of the Spectrum.
The Sports Complex, sometime between 1971 and 1992.
Top to bottom: The Vet, the Spectrum, JFK Stadium.

There is plenty of parking in the complex, including a lot on the site of  The Vet. But you'll be a lot better off if you take the subway. Not really because of the price of parking: At $16, it's one of the cheaper parking prices in baseball. But traffic is going to be awful. The first time I went to a sporting event in Philadelphia, it was a 4th of July celebration at the Vet, and 58,000 people showed up to see the Phils face the Houston Astros, with Nolan Ryan pitching. The game and the fireworks combined did not last as long as it took to get out of the parking lot and onto the Walt Whitman Bridge: 2 hours and 40 minutes. Trust me: Take the freakin' subway.

Coming out of the AT&T subway station, you’ll walk down Pattison Avenue, with a parking lot on the former site of Veterans Stadium to your left, and the site of the Spectrum, the 1967-1996 76ers & Flyers arena, to your right.

Further to your right is the successor to the Spectrum, the Wells Fargo Center. This building is 18 years old and is now under its 5th name. It was built on the site of John F. Kennedy Stadium, formerly Municipal Stadium, a 105,000-seat structure that hosted all kinds of events, from the Army-Navy Game to heavyweight title fights (Gene Tunney taking the title away from Jack Dempsey in 1926 and Rocky Marciano doing the same to Jersey Joe Walcott in 1952), from the occasional Eagles game that was too big for Shibe Park in the 1940s and ’50s to the U.S. half of Live Aid in 1985. And it hosted the Phils’ victory celebration in 1980, with its huge capacity coming in handy.

By that point, it was crumbling, and it surprised no one when it was demolished to make way for the new arena. The 76ers and Flyers moved in for the 1996 season. The Republican Party had their Convention there in 2000, nominating George W. Bush; the Democratic Party will meet there in 2016.

Continuing on Pattison Avenue until 11th Street, Citizens Bank Park will be on your left, and the new home of the Eagles, Lincoln Financial Field (a.k.a. The Linc), will be on your right. The complex's traditional address is 3601 South Broad Street, but the ballpark's official address is 1 Citizens Bank Way. (Citizens Bank Way is the block of 11th Street on the stadium's west side.)
Don’t be fooled by the map: Philadelphia International Airport is 4 miles from the Sports Complex, so you won’t get rattled by plane after plane after plane going overhead, like in Flushing Meadow.

You'll most likely be entering the park from the gate behind home plate, or on the 1st base side. Inside the park, concourses are wide and well-lit, a big departure from the Vet (as Citi Field’s are from Shea Stadium). Escalators are safe and nearly always work, as opposed to the Vet, which did not have escalators, only seemingly-endless ramps. Getting to your seat should be easy.

The park faces north, and buildings such as the Comcast Center (tallest building in Pennsylvania), One Liberty Place (tallest between New York and Chicago when it was completed in 1987), Two Liberty Place and City Hall (tallest in the world from 1901 to 1908) can be seen from seats behind home plate.

The field, thankfully, is natural grass. Outfield distances are as follows: Left-field pole, 329; left-center, 374; deepest part of the park, left of dead center, 409; center, 401; right-center, 369; right-field pole, 330.
It's not clear who hit the longest home run at Shibe Park/Connie Mack Stadium, as Jimmie Foxx (A's) and Dick Allen (Phillies) regularly launched drives over the double-decked bleachers in left field. Mickey Mantle also hit a couple of blasts over it, most notably in April 1953, a month in which he also crushed them out of the old parks in Washington (the alleged 565-footer) and St. Louis. Foxx and Lou Gehrig each hit a drive out to Shibe's distant center field corner, 447 feet away from home plate.

In spite of epic blasts by Mike Schmidt and Greg Luzinski (including hitting the replica of the Liberty Bell on the upper deck in 1972, leading to that area of seating being nicknamed the Bull Ring), the longest home run at the Vet was hit by Pittsburgh's Willie Stargell, in 1971, well over 500 feet, into the 600 Level. Which is only fair, because, while "Pops" had the longest homer at several stadiums, Luzinski had the longest at his home park, Three Rivers, in 1979. Ryan Howard, with a 505-foot blast on June 27, 2007, currently has the longest home run at Citizens Bank Park.

Citizens Bank Park hosted the NHL Winter Classic on January 2, 2012 -- the day after New Year's Day, because January 1 was a Sunday, and the NFL was finishing its regular season. The whole point of the Winter Classic isn't to evoke memories of childhood hockey on outdoor ponds, but to give the NHL a single day every season where it is the focus of attention -- its "Super Bowl" in midseason. The rink was laid out over the infield, dugout to dugout. Unfortunately, the Flyers lost to the one team I would want them to beat, the Rangers.

Food. From Old Original Bookbinder's (125 Walnut Street at 2nd, now closed) and Le Bec Fin (1523 Walnut at 16th) to the Reading Terminal Market (Philly's "South Street Seaport" at 51 N. 12th St at Filbert) to the South Philly cheesesteak giants Pat’s, Geno’s and Tony Luke’s, Philly is a great food city and don’t you ever forget it. The variety of food available at Citizens Bank Park is unbelievable. Little of it is healthy (no surprise there), but all of it is good.

Some of the best is at the outfield concourse known as Ashburn Alley, named for Richie "Whitey" Ashburn, the 1950s center fielder and longtime broadcaster (and original 1962 Met center fielder), whose statue is in the Alley beyond straightaway center field. In left field is Harry the K’s, a bar named for Ashburn’s former broadcast partner, the late Harry Kalas. A statue of Kalas, microphone in hand, is outside.

In right field is Bull’s BBQ, named for 1970s slugger Greg Luzinski, a takeoff on the Boog Powell concept at Baltimore’s Camden Yards, right down to the Bull himself often being there to pose for pictures with fans. And Luzinski’s stuff is better than Boog’s. Seriously: I've tried them both, and while Boog's is good, it's a little too spicy for my taste; as for Bull's, as my girl Rachael Ray would say, “Yum-O.”

Ashburn Alley also includes outlets of Tony Luke’s cheesesteaks, and another South Philly legend, Chickie’s & Pete’s. This is a seafood restaurant – or, should I say, “Dis is a fish joint” – famous for its “crab fries.” Turns out, it’s just French fries with Old Bay seasoning mix, not fries with crabmeat. They’re okay, nothing special; unlike Bull's BBQ (or Shake Shack), you shouldn't go out of your way to get some. Chickie’s & Pete’s has a restaurant near the Sports Complex at 1526 Packer Avenue; one on the Black Horse Pike in Egg Harbor near Atlantic City; one on the Wildwood Boardwalk; and one at Arm & Hammer Park, home of the Trenton Thunder, a Yankee farm team.

Team History Displays. Citizens Bank Park has 6 statues. As I mentioned, statues of Ashburn and Kalas are inside. A statue of old-time Athletics owner-manager Connie Mack that was first placed outside the stadium named for him, and later moved to the Vet, now stands outside the 3rd base stands. One of 1970s-80s Phillies slugger Mike Schmidt is outside the 3rd base gate. One of 1950s Phils ace Robin Roberts is outside the 1st base gate. And one of 1970s-80s Phils ace Steve Carlton is at the left field gate.

Back inside, next to Ashburn’s statue is a display of every Phillie that has made the All-Star Team at each position -- as far as I know, this is a feature that no other MLB team has at its park. Behind the Alley are their championship pennants: The 1980 and 2008 World Championships (red with white numbers); the 1915, 1950, 1983, 1993 and 2009 National League Pennants (blue with white numbers); and the 1976, 1977, 1978, 2007, 2010 and 2011 NL Eastern Division titles (white with blue numbers).

On the wall holding up these pennants are the Phils' retired numbers. In addition to the Number 42 retired for all of baseball for Jackie Robinson, they are: 1, 1950s center fielder Richie Ashburn; 14, 1960s pitcher Jim Bunning; 20, 1970s-80s 3rd baseman Mike Schmidt; 32, 1970s-80s pitcher Steve Carlton; and 36, 1950s pitcher Robin Roberts. They also have "P" designations for 1910s pitcher Grover Cleveland Alexander, who played before uniform numbers were worn; and for 1930s slugger Chuck Klein, who changed numbers so many times that it wasn't worth retiring a single number for him.

Along the Alley is the Philadelphia Baseball Wall of Fame. The Phillies used to honor one ex-Phillie and one ex-Athletic every season, with the exception of 1983, which was the Phils’ 100th Anniversary season. That year, they polled the fans for their Centennial Team, and posted a plaque with the winners on it. When they left the Vet, the A’s plaques were taken to a museum dedicated to the memory of the A’s, while a plaque containing all of those honorees' names was placed on the base of Mack's statue outside. Each year still sees the induction of a new Phils hero.

Despite Ashburn having played his last season with the expansion Mets, the honoree most Met fans will be interested in is Tug McGraw, Met reliever in the 1969 and 1973 World Series, and the man who closed out so many games for the Phils, including the clinching Game 6 of the 1980 World Series. But “Ya gotta believe” that no Met fan will be interested in seeing Juan Samuel’s plaque on this wall.

As yet, Lenny Dykstra, whom the Mets foolishly traded for Samuel in 1989, has not been honored. Since "Nails" is now a convicted felon, and is now in prison for up to 3 years, his induction is not likely to come anytime soon. But, just as some members of the '86 Mets have been honored in the Mets Hall of Fame, so, too, are some of the '93 "Macho Row" Phils honored.

On August 12, the Phils will make Jim Thome their 38th honoree on this Wall of Fame. The 38 honorees are as follows:

From the 19th Century: Left fielder Ed Delahanty, right fielder Sam Thompson and center fielder Billy Hamilton.

From the early 20th Century: Right fielder Sherry Magee.

From the 1915 Pennant: Alexander and right fielder Clifford "Gavvy" Cravath.

From the 1920s, '30s and '40s: Klein and center fielder Cy Williams.

From the 1950 "Whiz Kids" Pennant: Roberts, Ashburn, left fielder Del Ennis, 2nd baseman Granville "Granny" Hamner, pitcher Curt Simmons, and 3rd baseman Willie "Puddin' Head" Jones.

From the 1964 near-miss: Bunning, pitcher Chris Short, 3rd/1st baseman Dick "Don't call me Richie!" Allen, right fielder Johnny Callison, 2nd baseman Tony Taylor, and broadcaster Ashburn.

From the 1980 World Champions: Carlton, Schmidt, Luzinski, McGraw, manager Dallas Green (who was also a pitcher on the '64 team), general manager Paul Owens, shortstop Larry Bowa, center fielder Garry Maddox, catcher Bob Boone, infielder John Vuckovich (later a longtime coach), and broadcasters Ashburn and Harry Kalas. MLB's ban on Pete Rose has prevented the Phils from officially honoring him in this way.

From the 1983 Pennant: Manager/GM Owens, Carlton, Schmidt, McGraw, Maddox, 2nd baseman Juan Samuel, and broadcasters Ashburn and Kalas.

From the 1993 Pennant: Catcher Darren Daulton, 1st baseman John Kruk, pitcher Curt Schilling, and broadcasters Ashburn and Kalas.

From the interregnum between the 1993 and 2008 Pennants: Catcher Mike Lieberthal, 1st baseman Jim Thome and broadcaster Kalas.

From the 2008 World Champions: Kalas, manager Charlie Manuel, and left fielder Pat Burrell. Shortstop Jimmy Rollins, 2nd baseman Chase Utley and pitcher Cole Hamels are still active; and 1st baseman Ryan Howard and catcher Carlos Ruiz are still with the Phillies. However, pitchers Jamie Moyer and Brad Lidge have retired, and could be elected.

Although he, like Kalas, has received the Baseball Hall of Fame's Ford Frick Award, Byrum "By" Saam has not been elected to the Philadelphia Baseball Wall of Fame. Bill Campbell, who also broadcast for the Phils, has received the broadcaster's award for the Basketball Hall of Fame.

A Phillies' All-Time Team was chosen in 1969, in conjunction with the 100th Anniversary of Professional Baseball. Most of the players were from the 1950 Whiz Kids: 1st baseman Eddie Waitkus, shortstop Hamner, 3rd baseman Jones, left fielder Ennis, center fielder Ashburn, catcher Andy Seminick, and pitcher Roberts. Surprisingly, only pitcher Short and 2nd baseman Cookie Rojas were chosen from the recent near-miss of 1964, not Bunning, Allen or Callison. Klein was the only pre-Whiz Kids player chosen.

The Centennial Team chosen in 1983 was as follows: 1st base, Rose; 2nd base, Manny Trillo; shortstop, Bowa; 3rd base, Schmidt, who was also then selected as the franchise's greatest player ever; outfielders, Ennis, Ashburn and Maddox; ; catcher, Boone; pitchers, Roberts, Carlton, McGraw and 1950s reliever Jim Konstanty; and manager, Green.

When Veterans Stadium closed in 2003, an All-Vet Team was chosen: 1st base, Kruk; 2nd base, Samuel; shortstop, Bowa; 3rd base, Schmidt; left field, Luzinski; center field, Maddox; right field, Bobby Abreu (the only then-current player to make it, although Bowa was then the Phils' manager); catcher, Daulton; pitchers, Carlton, Schilling and McGraw; and manager, Green.


On the other side of the plaza containing the Wall of Fame is a wall featuring the histories of the Phils’ former home fields: Recreation Park, 1883 to 1886; National League Park, 1887 to 1894 when it burned down; Baker Bowl, built on the site of National League Park in 1895 and abandoned in 1938; Shibe Park, built for the A’s in 1909, the Phils moved in during the 1938 season, renamed Connie Mack Stadium in 1952, the A’s left after 1954 and the Phils did so after 1970; and Veterans Stadium, 1971 to 2003.

In 1933, Chuck Klein and Dick Bartell were the Phillies' selectees to the 1st All-Star Game. In 1999, Schmidt and (despite his ban) Rose were named to the Major League Baseball All-Century Team. That same year, The Sporting News named them, Alexander, Klein, Roberts and Carlton to their 100 Greatest Players.

Stuff. The Phillies love to sell team-themed merchandise, from DVDs (including team histories and a tribute to Ashburn) to books to caps to jerseys to autographed balls. They sell stuffed Phanatic dolls and children's books with the Phanatic as the protagonist, written by Phanatic portrayer Tom Burgoyne, who succeeded original Phanatic Dave Raymond (who wore the outfit from 1978 to 1993). There's even a takeoff on the "build-a-bear" theme, "Build Your Own Phanatic." I don't think I've ever seen so much team merchandise available per square foot at any stadium or arena I’ve ever visited.

There are some terrific books written about the Phillies. Some have been favorable, such as the newly-published The Fightin' Phillies: 100 Years of Philadelphia Baseball from the Whiz Kids to the Misfits, by official team historian Larry Shenk and pitcher-turned-broadcaster Larry Andersen; and You Can't Lose 'Em All: The Year the Phillies Finally Won the World Series (Frank Fitzpatrick's book about the 1980 team). Some have been not so favorable, such as The Fall of the 1977 Phillies: How a Baseball Team's Collapse Sank a City's Spirit (Mitchell Nathanson's Philly answer to The Bronx Is Burning).

There are DVD collections for the 1980 and 2008 World Championships, and an official video history of the team, Phillies Memories: The Greatest Moments In Philadelphia Phillies HistoryThe Essential Games of the Philadelphia Phillies DVD features 4 entire broadcasts: Game 5 of the 1980 NL Championship Series, the Pennant-clincher over the Houston Astros; Game 6 of the 1993 NLCS, the Pennant-clincher over the Atlanta Braves; Game 5 of the 2008 World Series, the clincher over the Tampa Bay Rays; and Game 1 of the 2010 NL Division Series against the Cincinnati Reds, Roy Halladay becoming only the 2nd pitcher ever to throw a postseason no-hitter.

Some of these "Essential Games" collections include 6 games. They could easily have included Game 6 of the 1980 World Series, the clincher over the Kansas City Royals; and the 2007 regular-season finale that clinched the NL East title while the Mets... Uh, let's move on.

During the Game. A recent Thrillist article named the Phillies' fans Number 5 on a list of "the most intolerable in baseball." For perspective, they named the Yankees' fans 4th and the Mets' 8th. The article compared Phils fans with the characters on the sitcom It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia. Unfavorably.

Well, this is not Veterans Stadium, or the Spectrum. It's not an Eagles or Flyers game. You can wear your Met gear at CBP without fear of drunken bums physically hassling you. And you don’t have to worry about them making fun of your less-traditional Met gear (such as orange caps or black jerseys). If they do, just remind them that the Phillies' uniforms haven’t always been classy red-pinstripe jobs. (The 76ers have had some whacked-out togs as well, and don’t even get me started on the Flyers’ 1980s duds. Seriously, long pants for hockey? Cooperalls?)

The Mets and Phillies have hardly ever both been good at the same time. This is a good thing, considering the proximity of the two cities. Giants vs. Eagles has been very nasty at times. The one Eagles game I ever saw at the Vet was the 2001 season finale, when a furious Giant comeback fell just short and the Eagles won the NFC East. It was Christmas/New Year’s week, it was about zero degrees, and the only hot things were the coffee, the hot chocolate, and the tempers.

The Flyers have had hard rivalries with all 3 New York Tri-State Area hockey teams: In the 1970s and ‘80s, Rangers-Flyers was always good for a punch-up, either on the ice or in the stands, Garden or Spectrum; the Islanders beat the Flyers to win their 1st Stanley Cup in 1980 (and you should never mention the name of referee Leon Stickle to a Philadelphian); and fans of the Devils and Flyers have been going at it hammer and tongs pretty much since the 1995 Eastern Conference Finals. (I don’t think Ron Hextall has seen that 65-foot wobbler off the stick of Claude Lemieux yet.)

But the Mets and Phillies? I saw the matchup twice at the Vet, and on neither occasion did I see anybody get rough with anybody else. And on neither occasion did the Mets win -- in fact, in both games they blew a lead.

Of the 5 seasons with the most combined wins for the Mets and Phils, 3 were 2006, ’07 and ’08. The top 2 were 1986, when the Mets won 108 and the Phils 86; and 1976, when the Phils won 101 and the Mets 86. To this day, 2008 is the only season in which both teams won as many as 88, and only 8 times in their 54 years of joint existence have both teams even finished above .500 – 4 of those, half, from 2005 to 2008. And 1986 and 2006 are the only seasons in which the Mets and Phils have finished 1st and 2nd, in that order; and 2007 and 2008 are the only times it was the other way around. While the Yankees and the Philadelphia Athletics had a real rivalry in the first half of the 20th Century, especially from 1927 to 1932, Mets vs. Phillies simply hasn't been of the same caliber.

So, unlike the hatred that exists between Philly fans and the New York Giants (football edition), the Dallas Cowboys, the Boston Celtics, the Los Angeles Lakers, and the New York-area hockey teams (but not between the 76ers and the Knicks or the Nets), Mets-Phils is still a recent thing in terms of a rivalry. As a result, while I can’t guarantee anything, you will probably be safe.

Except, maybe, from the Phillie Phanatic. He won't run you over with his ATV, but he might come into your section and razz you a bit. Since he’s supposed to be silent, it’ll be limited to gestures. Nothing obscene, of course, since he’s supposed to be there to entertain kids. But he might blow the kazoo streamer that serves as his "tongue" out of his nose and hit you with it. Usually, though, there's an usher nearby in case the Phanatic makes a mistake and does it too hard. (This wouldn't be unprecedented, though: For this and other reasons, he is the most-sued mascot in sports history.)
The Monday game is Asian Pacific Night. The Tuesday game is Autism Awareness Night. There will be functions related to both themes. There is no promotion for the Wednesday night game.

The Phillies hold auditions for National Anthem singers, instead of having a regular, like the neighboring Flyers do with Lauren Hart. There is no recognizable Phillies chant, not even, "Let's go, Phillies! (clap, clap, clap-clap-clap)" However, as John Facenda narrated (most likely, from Steve Sabol's writing) on an old NFL Films piece about the Eagles, "A Philadelphia fan learns to boo before he learns to talk." And the idea of Philadelphia fans becoming "The Philly Boo-Birds" goes back at least as far as the Athletics teams of the early 20th Century. (And, yes, these are the people who booed and threw snowballs at a man in a Santa Claus suit at an Eagles game in 1968.)

But Philadelphia fans are just as liable to boo their own players and management as the opposition. As Angelo Cataldi, the morning host on 610 WTEL (formerly WIP) and 94 WIP-FM (formerly WYSP), put it, "Should we reward apathy?"

During the 7th inning stretch, after "Take Me Out to the Ballgame" is played, the Phanatic and 2 young lady ushers will jump up onto the roof of the Phils' dugout and dance to some song or other. In the 1980s and early '90s, it was usually "Johnny B. Goode" by Chuck Berry. Now they mix the songs up, and it could be anything from the 1950s up to the present day. The Phanatic usually stays on the dugout roof for the entire bottom of the 7th, and gets back on in the top of the 9th (if the Phils are winning) or the bottom (if they're losing or tied).

The Phanatic won't dress up in an Elvis jumpsuit, complete with hair, like Mr. Met does, but he might dress up in boxing gloves and a robe, and pretend to punch something out as the theme from Philly-based movie series Rocky plays.

If a Phillie hits a home run, the big white Liberty Bell replica over right-center field will light up, and sway from side to side as it "tolls," complete with sound effects, while fireworks (something Philly knows a bit about) shoot off from the roof. This will also happen at the end of the game if the Phillies win. This bell replaces the one that used to hang from the outfield roof of the Vet, and before that from the Vet’s mezzanine until Luzinski hit it with a home run. (I wonder if it cracked on impact?)
An interesting feature is included in the out-of-town scoreboard: Minor-league games. A running score is kept of the Phils’ farm teams, some of which are not that far away: The Triple-A Lehigh Valley IronPigs in Allentown, the Double-A Reading Fightin' Phils, the Single-A Lakewood BlueClaws near the Jersey Shore, and the "Short A" Williamsport Crosscutters. As far as I know, the Yankees and the Mets have never done this, despite each having, since 2001, a farm team actually in The City (the Staten Island Yankees and the Brooklyn Cyclones) or nearby (currently, the Yankees have the Scranton/Wilkes-Barre Railriders and the Trenton Thunder, while the Mets have the Binghamton Mets).

In 1976, as they were storming their way to the NL East title, Schmidt, Luzinski, Bowa, Maddox and 2nd baseman Dave Cash, then the team Captain who popularized their "Yes We Can" slogan, appeared on a disco record, "Phillies Fever." Lot a lot of disco acts, they turned out to be one-hit wonders, because the Phillies got swept in the Playoffs. And, like a lot of one-hit wonders, the song is forgettable.

If the Phillies win, they'll play a version of the Frank Sinatra song "High Hopes," sung by Kalas during a locker room victory celebration in the Pennant season of 1993. Though I still don't know why an ant would want a rubber tree plant.

After the Game. Philadelphia is a big city, with all the difficulties of big cities as well as many of the perks of them. Especially at night, the risk of Phils fans getting rough increases, as they've had time to drink, but not by much. If it were an Eagles or Flyers game, you might have to worry, but probably not after a Phillies game. After all, just because they like to call CBP "the National League's answer to Fenway Park" (it isn't: Wrigley Field is), doesn't mean that they'll act like the drunken boors of Kenmore Square.

What you should do at the end of the game depends on what time it is and how you got there. Except for non-ESPN Sundays, the occasional Thursday afternoon "Businessperson's Special," and rain-forced day/night doubleheaders, all Phillies home games are night games.

If you took the train(s) down, you shouldn't have too much trouble getting back onto the subway, and to Suburban Station, in time to catch the 10:45 PM SEPTA R7 back to Trenton, which will allow you to get the 11:51 PM NJ Transit train back to New York, arriving at Penn Station at 1:22 AM. If, for whatever reason (extra innings, you stopped somewhere along the way, something else), you end up missing this train, there will be another an hour later, but the NJT train it connects to at Trenton at will be the last train of the night.

If you drove down, and you want to stop off for a late dinner and/or drinks (except, of course, for the designated driver), the nearby Holiday Inn at 9th Street & Packer Avenue has a bar that is co-owned by former Eagles quarterback, now ESPN pundit, Ron Jaworski. As I mentioned earlier, the original outlet of Chickie's & Pete's is at 15th & Packer. Right next to it is a celebrated joint, named, appropriately enough, Celebre Pizzeria.

(The legend is true: Richie Ashburn and his broadcast partners, Harry Kalas, Chris Wheeler and Andy Musser mentioned their great-tasting pizza on the air so often that, since Phils broadcasts were then sponsored by a pizzeria chain, they couldn't mention Celebre's anymore. So, just as Ashburn's New York counterpart, Phil Rizzuto, liked to mention birthdays and food, especially Italian food, on the air, "Whitey" rattled off a few birthday wishes, and said, "And I'd like to wish a Happy Birthday to the Celebre's twins, Plain and Pepperoni! Say, Wheels, how old are Plain and Pepperoni?" And Wheeler said, "Oh, about 20 minutes, I hope!" Sure enough, 20 minutes later, the delivery of the 2 pizzas was made. And nobody fired Richie Ashburn -- although he died from a diabetes-induced heart attack in 1997, and his eyesight was already getting bad enough that he was getting pressured to retire, and was considering it. He died at the Grand Hyatt adjacent to Grand Central, during a Phils roadtrip to play the Mets -- and he wasn't alone as initially reported: He had his mistress with him.)

The legendary Pat's and Geno's Steaks, arch-rivals as intense as any local sports opponents, are across 9th Street from each other at Passyunk Avenue in the Italian Market area. My preference is Pat's, but Geno's is also very good. Be advised, though, that the lines at both are of Shake Shack length, because people know they're that good. Also, Pat's was "the original Soup Nazi": You have to have your cash ready, and you have to quickly order your topping, your style of cheese, and either "wit" or "widdout" -- with or without onions. I haven't been there in a while, but I've been there often enough that I have a "usual": "Mushroom, whiz, wit."

Both Pat's and Geno's are open 24 hours, but, because of the length of the line, unless you drove down to the game, I would recommend not going there after the game, only before (if you can make time for it). Broad Street Line to Ellsworth-Federal, then 5 blocks east on Federal, and 1 block south on 9th.

The Tavern on Broad, at 200 S. Broad Street at Walnut, sand the Fox & Hound, at 1501 Spruce Street and 15th Street, have both been alleged to be the headquarters of the local Giants fan club. Revolution House, at 200 Market Street and 2nd Street, is apparently the local Jets fan hangout.

A particular favorite restaurant of mine is the New Deck Tavern, at 3408 Sansom Street in University City, on the Penn campus. You can also pick up a sandwich, a snack or a drink at any of several Wawa stores in and around the city. If you came in via Suburban Station, there's one at 1707 Arch, a 5-minute walk away; if the game lasts 3 hours or less, you have a shot at getting in, getting your order, getting out, and getting back to the station in time to catch your train.

Sidelights. The Philadelphia sports complex once included 3 buildings that have all been replaced and demolished: From north to south, the Vet, the Spectrum and JFK Stadium. The arena now known as the Wells Fargo Center was built on the site of JFK Stadium. Citizens Bank Park, the new home of the Phillies, was built to the east of The Vet. And Lincoln Financial Field was built south of the new ballpark, and east of the Spectrum.

* Sesquicentennial/Municipal/JFK Stadium. Built in 1926 for a 150th Anniversary (Sesquicentennial of American independence) world's fair in Philadelphia, this 105,000-seat horseshoe (open at the north end) was designed for football, but one of its earliest events was a fight for the Heavyweight Championship of the World. For the 1st time, that title changed hands on a decision, rather than on a knockout. But Gene Tunney so decisively outfought champion Jack Dempsey that no one disputed it. (When they had their rematch a year later, at Soldier Field in Chicago, that was another story.)

The stadium was renamed Municipal Stadium in 1931 (sometimes it was called simply Philadelphia Stadium), and, due to being (roughly) halfway between the service academies, became the site of the Army-Navy Game from 1936 to 1941, and again from 1945 to 1979, before it was moved to The Vet.

The Eagles played home games there from 1936 to 1939, and in 1941, and select games thereafter, including the 1950 season opener that was, as soccer fans would call it, a "Charity Shield" game: The 2-time defending NFL Champion Eagles vs. the Cleveland Browns, 4-time titlists in the All-America Football Conference. The Browns were 47-4-3 over the AAFC's 4-season history; the Eagles, 22-3-1 over the last 2 years, thanks to a 5-2 alignment that was the 1st defensive unit to have a memorable nickname: Before San Diego and Los Angeles had a Fearsome Foursome, Philly had a Suicide Seven.

Some people then called it "The Game of the Century," and some now think of as an unofficial "first Super Bowl" -- ironic, since neither team has won an NFL Championship in the Super Bowl era, and the Browns haven't even been to a Super Bowl yet. Playing on a Saturday night -- making it, sort of, not just "the 1st Super Bowl" but "the 1st Monday Night Football game" -- in front of 71,237 fans, which is still the largest crowd ever to watch a football game in Philadelphia (and nearly double the capacity of Shibe Park, which really limited the Eagles' attendance), the Browns beat the Eagles 35-10, stunning football fans all over the nation. The Eagles never recovered, while the Browns won the NFL title that year, and appeared in 7 title games in 8 years, winning 3.

In 1964, Municipal Stadium was renamed John F. Kennedy Stadium. On August 16, 1966, the Beatles played there. On July 13, 1985, it hosted the American end of Live Aid. But that show exposed to the world that it already falling apart. The Rolling Stones, who had packed the place on their 1981 Tattoo You tour, chose the considerably smaller Vet for Steel Wheels in 1989. It was demolished in 1992, and the new arena opened on the site in 1996.

* The Spectrum. This modern (for its time) arena opened in 1967, and 2 teams at the opposite ends of the competitive, uh, spectrum moved in: The 76ers, the NBA's defending Champions; and the Flyers, an NHL expansion team. Although the Flyers won inspirational (and confrontational) Stanley Cups in 1974 and '75, they also lost in the Finals in 1976, '80, '85 and '87. And while the Sixers won the 1983 NBA title in a dominating season-long performance, they also lost in the Finals in 1977, '80 and '82, and were lost after a couple of puzzling Draft Day trades in 1986.

The Spectrum hosted the NCAA Final Four in 1976 and 1981, both times won by Bobby Knight's Indiana. Since 1976 was the Bicentennial year, it also hosted the NBA and NHL All-Star Games. The Vet also hosted baseball's All-Star Game that year. And the Spectrum was the site of both fights between Philly native Rocky Balboa and Apollo Creed, the former in the first Rocky, on New Year's Day 1976, and the latter in Rocky II, on Thanksgiving of that year. (Rocky II was released in 1978, but the scripts make the dates definitive. All the movies' fights were actually filmed at the Los Angeles Sports Arena, due to its proximity to Hollywood.)

The Spectrum was also a big arena for college basketball: Villanova used it for home games that were too big for its on-campus Pavilion, the Atlantic 10 Conference used it for its tournament, and it hosted NCAA Tournament games at the sub-Final Four level, including the 1992 thriller that put Duke into the Final Four at Kentucky's expense, thanks to the last-second shot of Christian Laettner.

The 1st rock concert there was by Cream, on their 1968 farewell tour. The last, and the last public event there, was by Pearl Jam in 2009. Elvis Presley played it on November 8, 1971; 2 shows on June 23, 1974; June 28, 1976; and, on what turned out to be his final tour, May 28, 1977. The Grateful Dead and Aerosmith became known for their Spectrum shows. So did Billy Joel and Bruce Springsteen, who are honored with banners for their shows at the Wells Fargo Center. (Billy and Elton John are so honored at Madison Square Garden.)

The Spectrum became, in the words of its promoters, "America's Showplace" and the most-used sports arena in the world. This was a blessing and a curse: They could make a lot of money off of it, but it was limited. So Spectacor, the company that owned the Spectrum and the Sixers, built Spectrum II -- which, in a series of naming-rights changes due to bigger banks swallowing old ones, became the CoreStates Center, the First Union Center (Flyer fans loved calling it "the F.U. Center"), the Wachovia Center and now the Wells Fargo Center.

From 1996 to 2009, the arenas stood side-by-side. The main Spectrum tenants said goodbye as follows: The Flyers with an exhibition game on September 27, 2008, with all their former Captains on hand, as the Fly Guys beat the Carolina Hurricanes 4-2; Villanova with the building's last college basketball game on January 28, 2009, a win over the University of Pittsburgh; and on March 13, 2009, the Sixers beat the Chicago Bulls 104-101 in a special regular-season game.

The Spectrum was demolished the next year, and replaced in part with a live concert venue called "Xfinity Live!" (Yes, the exclamation point is included in the official name.) This structure now hosts the statues that were outside the Spectrum: For Julius Erving, for Kate Smith, and a statue titled "Score!" depicting Gary Dornhoefer's overtime goal against the Minnesota North Stars in the 1973 Playoffs. The statue of Sylvester Stallone as Rocky was moved, appropriately enough, to the Philadelphia Museum of Art, not far from the steps he ran up in every movie. A hotel is planned for the rest of the Spectrum site.

* Veterans Stadium. When it opened on April 10, 1971, it was considered state of the art and wonderful. And, as the Phillies had a great team from 1976 to 1983, reaching 6 postseasons in 8 years, winning 2 Pennants and the 1980 World Series, it became beloved by Phils fans. The Eagles, too, had a resurgence in the late 1970s, and hosted and won the 1980 NFC Championship Game.
The Vet was seen as everything that Connie Mack Stadium was not: New instead of old, in good shape instead of falling apart, in a safe place instead of a ghetto (unless you were a New York Giants or Dallas Cowboys fan), and -- with Paul Owens and Dallas Green working their magic for the Phils, and Jim Murray and Dick Vermeil doing the same for the Eagles -- representative of victory instead of defeat.
The yellow-orange-red seat scheme was replaced
with all-blue in 1995. The video screens were added in 1986.
Note the Liberty Bell replica atop center field. 

The Vet hosted the Army-Navy Game every year from 1980 to 2001, except for 1983, 1989, 1993, 1997 and 2000. (The 1983 game was played at the Rose Bowl, the 2000 game at the new Ravens' stadium in Baltimore, and the rest, as well as the 2002 game, at the Meadowlands.) Temple played home games there from 1978 to 2002, and the USFL's Philadelphia Stars in 1983 and 1984. In the old North American Soccer League, the Philadelphia Atoms played there from 1973 to 1975, and the Philadelphia Fury from 1978 to 1980.

The Eagles had a down period in the mid-1980s, but rebounded toward the end of the decade. But the Phils had collapsed, and the Vet's faults began to be seen: It was ugly, the sight lines were bad for baseball, and the turf was bad for both sports. The turf was bad for everything, from eyes to knees.

By the time the Phils won the Pennant in 1993, Camden Yards had opened just down the road in Baltimore, and suddenly everyone wanted a downtown "retro park," and no one wanted one of the suburban (or sort-of-suburban, as in the Vet's case) "cookie-cutter stadiums" that dominated the 1960s and '70s.

It took a few more years, and a lot of complaints from opposing NFL players that the stadium was deteriorating and the turf was dangerous, for a new stadium to be approved. The Eagles closed the Vet out with a shocking and devastating loss to the Tampa Bay Buccaneers in the 2002 NFC Championship Game, and the Phils did so with a loss to the Atlanta Braves on September 28, 2003. The Eagles had already moved into their new stadium by that point, and the Phils moved into theirs the next April, a few days after the Vet's demolition. The baseball and football sculptures that were outside have been placed on Pattison Avenue, in front of the parking lot where the Vet once stood.

* Wells Fargo Center. Despite having 5 different names in its 1st 15 years, this arena, built on the site of JFK Stadium, is a big improvement over the Spectrum, which had a common flaw in arenas built in the 1960s, '70s and '80s: Two levels of seats but only one level of concourse. The Fargo has a lot more concourse space, and even a sellout doesn't feel cramped.

Since it opened, the Flyers have made their sport's Finals twice, in 1997 and 2010; the Sixers, once, in 2001; all 3 were lost. While the new arena is much more comfortable for the fans, it's not especially intimidating: The sound doesn't carry as well as it did in the Spectrum. No opposing hockey player is afraid of the noise that Flyer fans make anymore, the Sixers don't exactly have a good home-court advantage, and as for anyone being afraid of Villanova, well, even their newly-won National Championship won't make that happen: They're called "Vanilla-Nova" for a reason.

The arena includes a statue of Philly native, and former Warriors and Sixers star, Wilt Chamberlain, dedicated a few years after his death in 1999. (Dr. J got his statue shortly after he retired.) It hosted the Republican National Convention in 2000, nominating George W. Bush and Dick Cheney. So if you need a reason to dislike the place, there's a good one.

* Lincoln Financial Field. The new home of the Eagles has seen them make the Playoffs more often than not, and reach the Super Bowl in the 2004 season. And fan behavior, while still rowdy, is not as criminal as it was at The Vet: No more municipal court under the stands is necessary.

"The Linc" has hosted the Army-Navy Game every year since it opened, except for 2007 and 2011. It will also not host it this year or in 2016, as Baltimore will on those occasions. It's hosted 3 games of the U.S. National Soccer Team, an MLS All-Star Game, and several games by touring European teams such as Manchester United, Glasgow Celtic and A.C. Milan.

If you drove down, or you came by train early on Saturday and have the whole day to yourself before a 7:05 gametime, in addition to the other stadiums and arenas at the Sports Complex, there are lots of interesting locations for you to check out. Remember that, although the city's centerpoint is technically Broad & Market Streets, where City Hall is, the numbering of north-south streets starts at the Delaware River, so that Broad takes the place of 14th Street.

* Site of Shibe Park/Connie Mack Stadium. This is where the A's played from 1909 to 1954, the Phils from 1938 to 1970, and the Eagles in 1940, and from 1942 to 1957. The A's played World Series there in 1910, '11, '12, '13, '14, '29, '30 and '31, and the Phils (against the Yanks) in '50.
Home plate entrance, 21st & Lehigh

The Eagles played and won the 1948 NFL Championship Game at Shibe Park, beating the Chicago Cardinals 7-0 in a snowstorm, and also won the NFL title in '49 (though the title game was played in Los Angeles against the Rams). The Frankford Yellow Jackets sometimes used it in the 1920s, winning the 1926 NFL Championship.
3rd base dugout during the infamous 1964 season.
Number 4 is Phillies manager Gene Mauch.

On October 14, 1948, shortly after Israel declared its independence, its national soccer team faced the U.S. at Shibe Park, shortly after doing so at Yankee Stadium. These were Israel's 1st 2 matches, and the U.S. won them both.
After the Phillies bought the ballpark from the Mack family in 1952, they renamed it Connie Mack Stadium. The A's moved to Kansas City, and the Phils were alone in the increasingly inadequate 33,608-seat relic. They finally got Veterans Stadium built, and left Connie Mack Stadium after the 1970 season. A fire the next year gutted the place, and it was finally demolished in 1976.

The site sat vacant for many years, until Deliverance Evangelistic Church was built on the site in 1991. Be advised, though, that this is North Philly, and the church is easily the nicest building for several blocks around. Across the street is Dobbins Tech, a high school known for its great basketball program. (Remember the story of Hank Gathers and Bo Kimble? They went to Dobbins. So did Dawn Staley.) 21st Street & Lehigh Avenue. By subway, use the North Philadelphia station on the Broad Street Line, and walk 7 blocks west on Lehigh.
* Site of Baker Bowl. This was where the Phils played from 1887 to 1938, and the Eagles from 1933 to 1943 (though sometimes moving to Municipal Stadium, the one renamed for JFK). It was also the Eagles' 1st home, in the 1933, '34 and '35 seasons; and their predecessor franchise, the Frankford Yellow Jackets, played their last season there, 1931.
It was the last 19th Century ballpark still in use, and the last wooden one, too. A fire burned down the original, named Huntingdon Avenue Grounds, in 1894, but the new one opening in 1895, named for team owner William F. Baker,  was made of wood and steel as well. It wouldn't be until Shibe Park's opening in 1909 that one would be built of the far safer concrete and steel.

It seated 18,800, making it the smallest in the majors after World War I. It was not kept up well, and the Reading Railroad tunnel gave center field a bit of a rise. Baker Bowl became known as The Dump By the Hump. The team was just as bad, winning just 1 Pennant there, in 1915.

Because of the shape of the land, the right-field foul pole was just 280 feet from home plate, and so a high fence was erected. The fence was tall enough for a giant soap ad, reading, "The Phillies use LIFEBUOY." The joke was, "And they still stink!"

Southwest corner of Broad Street and Lehigh Avenue, 8 blocks east of the Connie Mack Stadium site. Same subway stop as Shibe/Connie Mack. The A's original home, Columbia Park (1901-08), was nearby at 29th Street & Columbia Avenue; and the Phillies' original home, Recreation Park (1883-86), was at 24th and Columbia, which is now named for a local civil rights leader, Cecil B. Moore Avenue. With any of these North Philly ballparks, if you want to visit, do it in daylight.

* The Palestra. Built in 1927, this is the arena aptly nicknamed the Cathedral of Basketball. It even has stained-glass windows. (I swear, I am not making that up.) The home gymnasium of the University of Pennsylvania (or just "Penn"), it also hosts some games of Philly's informal "Big 5" basketball programs when they play each other: Penn, Temple, La Salle, St. Joseph's and Villanova.

Penn, a member of the Ivy League, has one of the nicest college campuses anywhere, but do not be fooled by its Ivyness: In Philadelphia, even the Ivy Leaguers are tough. 235 South 33rd Street. Take the "Subway-Surface Line" trolley, either the Number 11, 13, 34 or 36, to the 33rd Street stop.

As I said, Philadelphia has hosted 2 NCAA Final Fours, both at the Spectrum. 'Nova has made it 5 times: 1939, 1971, 1985, 2009 and 2016. La Salle made it in back-to-back years, 1954 and 1955. Temple made it in 1956 and 1958, although never under legendary coach John Chaney. St. Joe's made it in 1961, and just missed in 2004. Penn made it in 1979, under future Detroit Pistons coach Chuck Daly. Temple won the NIT in 1938, but the only Philly-based National Champions under the NCAA banner (which began in 1939) are La Salle in 1954 and 'Nova in 1985 and 2016.

* Franklin Field, right next to the Palestra. The oldest continuously-used college football site, the Penn Quakers have played here since 1895 (which is also when the Penn Relay Carnival, the nation's premier track-and-field event, began), and in the current stadium since 1922. That year, it supposedly hosted the first football game ever broadcast on radio (a claim the University of Pittsburgh disputes), and in 1939 it supposedly hosted the first football game ever televised (a claim New York’s Columbia University disputes). The amazing building in the west end zone is the University administration building.

The original Franklin Field was the 1st midpoint/neutral site game for Army vs. Navy: 1899 to 1904, 1906 to 1912, and 1914. The current structure hosted it in 1922, and 1932 to 1935, before it was moved to Municipal/JFK Stadium.

The Eagles played here from 1958 to 1970, including their last NFL Championship, December 26, 1960, beating the Green Bay Packers in a thriller, 17-13. Half a century. Penn’s football team has been considerably more successful, having won 14 Ivy League titles since the league was formally founded in 1955.

Like the Palestra, the stadium at Franklin Field is in surprisingly good shape (must be all those Penn/Wharton Business School grads donating for its upkeep), although the playing field has been artificial turf since 1969. Same trolley stop as the Palestra.

* Site of the Philadelphia Civic Center. This complex included the Convention Hall, where Franklin D. Roosevelt was nominated for President by the Democrats in 1936, Wendell Willkie by the Republicans in 1940 and both Harry Truman and Thomas E. Dewey were nominated in 1948 – that year’s Republican Convention being the first televised convention. It was built on the site of the Exposition Auditorium, where the Republicans renominated William McKinley in 1900.

(The Democrats met in Atlantic City at the Convention Hall, now named Boardwalk Hall, in 1964, nominating Lyndon Johnson. 2301 Boardwalk at Mississippi Avenue. New Jersey Transit Atlantic City Line from 30th Street Station. The Beatles played there a few days before.)

The Beatles played here on September 2, 1964. Pope John Paul II said Mass here. The Philadelphia Warriors played here from 1952 to 1962, when they moved to San Francisco (and now the "Golden State Warriors" play in Oakland), and the 76ers from 1963 until the Spectrum opened in 1967. Titles were won here by the 1956 Warriors and the 1967 76ers. The Philadelphia Blazers played the 1st World Hockey Association season here, 1972-73, but were terrible, and with the Flyers on the way up, nobody wanted to see the WHA team. They moved to Vancouver the next season.

So many Philly area greats played here, in high school, college and the pros, but you need know one name -- pardon the pun -- above all others: Wilt Chamberlain. I saw a concert here in 1989, and the acoustics were phenomenal, with a horseshoe of seats and a stage at one end, much like Boardwalk Hall in Atlantic City and the building once known as the Baltimore Civic Center.

Built in 1931, it was demolished in 2005 to make way for the Perelman Center for Advanced Medicine. an addition to the University of Pennsylvania Hospital. 34th Street & Civic Center Boulevard. Same stop as the Palestra and Franklin Field, which are a block away.

* Site of Philadelphia Arena. Built in 1920, this was the first home of the NBA's Warriors from 1946 to 1952, and site of some 76ers home games as well. It seated only 6,500 at its peak, so the Civic Center and later the Spectrum were preferable.

The Arena made its name hosting college hockey: Penn playing there was understandable, but, at the time, Princeton and even faraway Yale did not have their own rinks, and used the Arena as home ice.

The worst team in NHL history played there: The 1930-31 Philadelphia Quakers. After 5 seasons as the Pittsburgh Pirates, they clowned their way to a record of 4 wins, 40 losses and 4 ties, making them about as bad as the worst team in NBA history, the 1972-73 76ers (9-73). They were strapped during this 2nd indoor sports season of the Great Depression, and went out of business thereafter. Although several minor-league teams would play at the Arena -- the Arrows, the Comets, the Ramblers, the Falcons and the Rockets -- it would not be until 1967, with the opening of the Spectrum and the beginning of the Flyers, that Philly would have another NHL team.

Baseball pitcher-turned-evangelist Billy Sunday delivered sermons there in the 1920s,, and Charles Lindbergh used it for an America First speech in 1940. Early in his career, Elvis sang at the Arena on back-to-back days, doing 2 shows each on April 5 and 6, 1957.

Philly's ABC affiliate, Channel 6, formerly WFIL and now WPVI, built its studio next-door. It still stands. The Arena does not: It caught fire on August 24, 1983, and had to be demolished. A housing project is on the site today. 4530 Market Street. Market Street Line to 46th Street.

* Talen Energy Stadium. Built in 2010 for the expansion Philadelphia Union of Major League Soccer, and named PPL Park until last year when PPL was bought by Talen Energy, it seats 18,500 people, on the bank of the Delaware River in Chester, under the Commodore Barry Bridge (U.S. Route 222), linking it with Gloucester County, New Jersey.

The main supporters' section is called the River End, and is home to The Sons of Ben. The group named themselves after Benjamin Franklin, and they created an alternate logo for the team, showing a skull, with a Liberty Bell-style crack in it, wearing Franklin's hairstyle and bifocals, on a kite-shaped background. Of course, fans of the rival New York Red Bulls and D.C. United tend to call them The Daughters of Betsy -- after Ross. The U.S. national team played Colombia there on October 12, 2010, but lost.

1 Stadium Drive, in Chester. SEPTA R2 train to Highland Avenue (not to the Chester Transportation Center), then a 15-minute walk. If you're only going for a visit, not a game when there would be plenty of police protection, do not visit at night: Chester can be a dangerous city.

* Site of Frankford Stadium. Philadelphia's 1st pro football team was the Frankford Yellow Jackets, who played at Frankford Stadium in Northeast Philly from 1924 to 1930, winning the 1926 NFL Championship, before a fire on the eve of the 1931 season forced them into Baker Bowl and then into folding.

The stadium was on a plot bounded by Frankford Avenue, Devereaux Avenue, Hawthorne Street and Benner Street. An AutoZone (at 6137 Frankford) and rowhouses are on the site now. Market-Frankford Line to Frankford Transportation Center, then transfer to SEPTA Bus 66 Frankford & Harbison Avenues.

* Site of Broadwood Hotel. From 1924 to 1991, this hotel stood at the intersection of Broad and Wood Streets, just north of Center City. From 1924 to 1946, its ballroom was the home of the Philadelphia SPHAs -- a basketball team run by the South Philadelphia Hebrew Association, even though it wasn't in South Philly. This team would evolve into the Warriors. A parking deck for Hahnemann University Hospital is on the site now. Broad Street Line to Race-Vine.

* Site of Cherry Hill Arena. Before the Devils, the 1st hockey team with major league pretensions to call New Jersey home was actually in South Jersey. In the 1973-74 World Hockey Association season, the former New York Raiders set up shop at the Cherry Hill Arena in Bergen County, and renamed themselves the Jersey Knights.

The building went up in 1959 as the Ice House, and was later renamed the Delaware Valley Gardens before assuming its most familiar name, but no one was confusing it with Madison Square Garden (old or new), the Boston Garden or Maple Leaf Gardens in Toronto. Sports Illustrated called it "perhaps the worst facility" used by any WHA team, noting that it lacked showers in the dressing room for visiting teams, who had to dress at a Holiday Inn 2 miles away, and that the ice surface was not even level, giving the home team a distinct advantage, as, 2 periods out of every 3, the visitors would have to skate uphill to the opponent's goal.

The Eastern Hockey League placed 2 teams there: The Jersey Larks in 1960-61, and the Jersey Devils (the 1st pro hockey team with the name) from 1964 until 1973, when the arrival of the Knights forced their move. The Philadelphia Warriors played an occasional "home game" there.

The Knights left for San Diego after the 1973-74 season. In 1978, the Arena was renamed The Centrum, and the Northeastern Hockey League placed the Jersey Aces there, but they only lasted a few games. The Arena was demolished in 1981. 

The site is now a parking lot for a shopping center that includes a Burger King and a Retro Fitness. 1447 Brace Road, at Haddonfield-Berlin Road. Not easy to reach by public transit: PATCO train to Haddonfield, then almost a half-hour walk.

* Temple University. Straddling the border between Center City and the mostly-black North Philadelphia ghetto, Temple has given thousands of poor urban kids a chance to make something of themselves, including comedian Bill Cosby, who ran track for the school, including in the Penn Relays at Franklin Field.

Temple now plays basketball at the Liacouras Center, at 1776 N. Broad Street, across from its former arena, McGonigle Hall, at 1800. Broad Street Line to Cecil B. Moore station.

The Owls have played football at the South Philly complex since 1978, first at The Vet and now at the Linc. From 1928 to 1977, they played at Temple Stadium, a 20,000-seat facility on the city's northern edge. On September 25, 1968, the U.S. soccer team played Israel to a draw there. It was demolished in 1996, and, like Shibe Park/Connie Mack Stadium, the site is now home to a church. 2800 Pickering Avenue at Vernon Road. Broad Street Line to Olney Transportation Center, then transfer to the Number 18 bus toward Cedarbook Mall.

* LaSalle University. All of Philly's Big 5 basketball universities are private; unlike Penn and Temple, La Salle, St. Joe's and 'Nova are Catholic. LaSalle is in the northernmost reaches of the city, its bookstore at 1900 W. Olney Avenue, and the Explorers' new Tom Gola Arena, named for their late 1950s superstar and 1960s coach, and 2100 W. Olney. Broad Street Line to Olney Transportation Center.

* St. Joseph's University. St. Joe's straddles the western edge of the city, on a hill bisected by City Line Avenue. They are known for their Hawk mascot flapping his wings throughout the game, never stopping, thus leading to the chant, "The Hawk will never die!" This, of course, leads their Big 5 opponents to chant, "The Hawk must die!" and, if victorious, "The Hawk is dead!"

Their fieldhouse, now named the Michael J. Hagan Arena, is at 2450 N. 54th Street, and features a plaque commemorating a 1967 speech delivered there by Martin Luther King. Number 44 bus from Center City.

* Villanova University. The Wildcats just won their 2nd National Championship, defeating North Carolina in a thriller in Houston, 31 years after their even more amazing upset of Georgetown in Lexington, Kentucky.

Famously (well, famous within the Philadelphia area, anyway), they played a Big 5 game against St. Joe's at the Palestra a few years back, having beaten each of the other Big 5 schools, and, pulling away, their fans chanted, "We own Philly!" The St. Joe's fans, no fools, reminded them of their location, in the town of Villanova, 18 miles northwest of Center City: "You ain't Philly!"

Jake Nevin Field House, their home at the time of their 1985 National Championship, and The Pavilion, which that success allowed them to build, are next to each other, along with their bookstore, at 800 E. Lancaster Avenue. They also have a 12,500-seat stadium for their Division I-AA football team. SEPTA R5 commuter rail to Villanova Station.

Of the Big 5, only Temple plays Division I-A football: Temple, 'Nova and LaSalle play I-AA, and while St. Joseph's Prep has one of the better programs in Philly-area high school football, their collegiate namesake doesn't play football at all.

* Spike's Trophies. When the Philadelphia Athletics Historical Society closed its facility in the northern suburb of Hatboro, they moved their operations, and the plaques honoring A's greats that used to be on the concourse wall at the Vet, to this store near Northeast Philadelphia Airport. 2701 Grant Avenue at Ashton Road. Market-Frankford Line to Frankford Transportation Center, then transfer to Number 50 Bus.

* Laurel Hill Cemetery. This is the final resting place of former Phillies manager Harry Wright, who founded the 1st professional team, the Cincinnati Red Stockings, in 1869; and of longtime broadcaster Harry Kalas. 215 Belmont Avenue in Bala Cynwyd, not far from the St. Joe's campus. Use the Number 44 bus to get to both.

* Gladwyne Methodist Church. Kalas' longtime broadcast partner, the Hall of Fame center fielder Richie "Whitey" Ashburn, is laid to rest here. 316 Righters Mill Road in Gladwyne. The Number 44 bus can also be used for this.

* Holy Sepulchre Cemetery. This is the final resting place of Connie Mack. 3301 W. Cheltenham Avenue. Broad Street Line to Olney Transportation Center, then Number 22 bus.

Philadelphia is home to Independence National Historic Park, including Independence Hall and the Liberty Bell. The Visitor's Center is at 6th & Market Streets: At this complex, there will be people there to advise you on what to do. 5th Street on the Market Street Line.

The President's House -- that's as formal a name as it had -- was where George Washington (1790-97) and John Adams (1797-1800) lived while Philadelphia was the national capital before Washington, D.C.. It was demolished in 1832. When digging to build the new Liberty Bell Center, the house's foundation was found, and somebody must've asked, "Why didn't anybody think of this before?" So, an exhibit has been set up, at 530 Market Street at 6th. The new Liberty Bell Center is between it and Independence Hall (Chestnut Street between 5th and 6th). Be advised that since 9/11 -- and since the movie National Treasure -- they're understandably a bit finicky about security there.

The oldest surviving Presidential residence (chosen specifically for the President, not counting homes like Mount Vernon or Monticello) is the Germantown White House, which still stands at 5442 Germantown Avenue. George Washington and John Adams used it to escape the heat and, more importantly, the yellow fever epidemics of what's now Center City Philadelphia, making it less "the first Summer White House" and more "the first Camp David." SEPTA R7 to Germantown, then 3 blocks down Armat Street and a left on Germantown Avenue. Definitely not safe at night.

Speaking of George Washington, Valley Forge National Historical Park is just an hour's bus ride from Suburban Station. On JFK Blvd. at 17th Street, board the SEPTA 125 bus. Valley Forge Casino Resort and the King of Prussia Mall are a short drive (or a moderate walk) away. The fare is $4.75 each way ($9.50 total).

Only one President has ever come from Pennsylvania, and he might be the worst one of all: James Buchanan, whose Administration began with the Panic of 1857 and ended with the secession of several Southern States. (Whether Buchanan was gay has been debated since even before he became President, but the evidence is flimsy.) His home, Wheatland, still stands at 1120 Marietta Avenue in Lancaster, and he's buried about a mile away in Greenwood Cemetery. But Lancaster, the heart of "Pennsylvania Dutch Country," is 80 miles west of Philly. It's a cheap trip by Amtrak standards, but unless you've always wanted to visit the area, or you're a big history buff, I'd suggest forgetting about it if you're pressed for time.

The Musical Fund Hall hosted the 1st Republican National Convention in 1856, nominating John C. Fremont for President. (He lost to Buchanan.) It was one of many historical meetings at this building, which has stood since 1824. 808 Locust Street, Center City. The Academy of Music hosted their 1872 Convention, renominating President Ulysses S. Grant. It opened in 1857, and hosted the Philadelphia Orchestra from 1900 to 2001, when the Kimmel Center opened across Locust Street. 240 S. Broad Street, Center City.

And the Walnut Street Theatre, which opened in 1809 and is the oldest continuously operating theater in America, hosted the 1st Presidential Debate of the 1976 campaign, between Gerald Ford and Jimmy Carter. 825 Walnut Street, Center City.

Philadelphia's answer to the Museum of Natural History is the University of Pennsylvania Museum, at 33rd & South Streets, across from Franklin Field. (Same trolley stop.) Their answer to the Hayden Planetarium -- and a better one -- is the Franklin Institute, which is also the national memorial to Big Ben, the man who, more than any man made any city in the Western Hemisphere, made Philadelphia. 20th Street & Benjamin Franklin Parkway. Number 76 bus. 76, get it? The bus is nicknamed "The Ben FrankLine."

At the other end of the Parkway, at 25th and Spring Garden Streets, is Philly's answer to the Metropolitan, the Philadelphia Museum of Art. The Rocky Balboa statue is here, and it doesn't cost anything except sweat to run up the steps.

The chocolate city of Hershey, Pennsylvania is 95 miles west of Center City, and only 15 miles east of the State Capitol in Harrisburg. The smell of chocolate wafts over the city, and is the source of the nickname "The Sweetest Place On Earth." Amtrak goes from 30th Street station to Harrisburg and nearby Middletown (the home of the infamous Three Mile Island nuclear power plant, which is still in operation and hasn't had an incident since the one in 1979), but if you want to go to any prominent place in Hersey, you'll have to rely on local bus service.

There are 4 prominent places in Hershey. There's the Hershey's chocolate factory. There's Hersheypark amusement park. There's Hersheypark Stadium is a 15,641-seat high school football stadium, opened in 1939. On May 9, 1990, the U.S. soccer team beat Poland there. Most notably, Hersheypark Arena, formerly Hershey Sports Arena, which now seats 7,286 people. The Warriors and 76ers played a few home games here, including the March 2, 1962 contest between the Warriors and the Knicks, when Wilt Chamberlain scored 100 points.

The minor-league Hershey Bears used it from its opening in 1936 until 2002, when the 10,500-seat Giant Center opened next-door. It still hosts college hockey and concerts. Appropriately, the address of the Arena is 100 W. Hershey Park Drive.

No college football rivalry has been played more than Lafayette College and Lehigh University, separated by 17 miles of U.S. Route 22 in Northeastern Pennsylvania. Lafayette is in Easton, 69 miles north of Center City; Lehigh is in Bethlehem, 56 miles north. On occasion, they've played each other twice and, during World War II, even 3 times a season. Now, they limit themselves to 1. In 2014, on the occasion of their 150th meeting, they played each other at the new Yankee Stadium, with Lafayette winning. Lehigh won last year, but Lafayette leads the series, 78-68-5.

Lehigh's Goodman Stadium hosted a U.S. soccer game on October 23, 1993, a draw vs. Ukraine -- although I doubt too many people in the Delaware Valley were paying attention, as that was the day of Game 6 of the World Series, which the Phillies lost to the Toronto Blue Jays on the Joe Carter home run.

Believe it or not, it's easier to reach both Easton and Bethlehem without a car from New York than it is from Philadelphia: Transbridge Lines runs buses from Port Authority into the Lehigh Valley, and Susquehanna Trailways runs them from Philly's Greyhound Terminal at 1001 N. Filbert Street, across from the Market East Station.

Not surprisingly for a city of its size, Philadelphia has had a few TV shows set there, but not many actually filmed there. Boy Meets World was filmed entirely at the Walt Disney Studios in Burbank. (Its sequel series, Girl Meets World, featuring Cory & Topanga Matthews and their kids, is set in New York.) Neither does It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia film in Philly -- and it is not always sunny there. Nor did Thirtysomething film there. Nor did Body of Proof. And, being a cartoon, Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids didn't have to "film" anywhere.

The 1960s flashback series American Dreams did some filming under the Market Street Elevated Line, but most of it was filmed in L.A. The films PhiladelphiaThe Philadelphia Story and The Philadelphia Experiment had a few Philly locations put in, but all filming was done in Southern California. For chronological reasons, the film version of the musical 1776 couldn't be filmed on the streets of Philadelphia, or even inside Independence Hall -- although National Treasure used the Hall, and the Franklin Institute, and the Reading Terminal Market.

Probably the best-known film set in the city is Trading Places -- except a lot of it was filmed in and around New York! The New York Chamber of Commerce Building (65 Liberty Street) and the Seventh Regiment Armory (643 Park Avenue) stood in for the Heritage Club. Mill Neck Manor for the Deaf on Long Island stood in for the Duke Brothers' estate. And, of course, the climactic scene was set at the New York Mercantile Exchange, at 4 World Trade Center, which was at destroyed in the 9/11 attacks. Locations in the film that were absolutely in Philly were: 30th Street Station; Duke & Duke, at Fidelity Bank at 135 S. Broad Street, 2 blocks south of City Hall; and Lewis Winthorpe's residence, with exterior shots at 2014 Delancey Place at 20th Street, near Rittenhouse Square, which is where Eddie Murphy pretended to be a blind, legless Vietnam veteran. (This is a private residence: Walk down there if you like, but leave the residents alone.)

*

So, to sum up, I would definitely recommend to any baseball fan, even a Met fan, that they take in a Phillies game at Citizens Bank Park. I think it's the best of the 1992-present "retro ballparks" -- even if the home fans aren't always nice.

I’d tell you to have fun, but, since you're Met fans, facing Philly fans, I'll say, instead, "Try not to get yourself or anybody else killed."

Yankees Make a Different Difference vs. Pesky Blue Jays

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The Yankees opened a 3-game series away to those pesky Toronto Blue Jays last night, and if they'd played most of the games between them last season the way they played this one, it would have been the Yanks, not the Jays, winning the American League Eastern Division. Alas, the Yanks went 6-13 against the Jays, and that made the difference.

Last night, the Yankees made a different difference.

A baseball team shouldn't need 5 separate pitchers to hold the opposition to 2 runs on 3 hits over 9 innings. But when Joe Girardi is the manager, it can happen.

Masahiro Tanaka started for the Yankees, and Girardi hit the panic button by removing him after 5 innings, in which he threw 92 pitches, allowing said 2 runs on 3 hits, walking 4, striking out 6. Any manager who isn't a scaredy-cat would have let Tanaka continue.

Girardi didn't. He used Johnny Barbato, Chasen Shreve, Dellin Betances and Andrew Miller. Between them, they allowed only 2 baserunners: A walk each by Barbato and Shreve.

The Yankees got a run on a Starling Castro groundout in the 2nd, Brian McCann's 2nd home run of the season in the 6th, and a Jacoby Ellsbury single in the 7th.

Perhaps the biggest moment in the game came in the bottom half of that inning. With 2 out and the tying run on 2nd base, Jose Bautista, who had earlier doubled home Toronto's runs off Tanaka in the 3rd, batted against Betances. Betances has struggled in big moments since the start of last season, and Bautista has been trying to succeed David Ortiz as the big Yankee Killer of the age.

But, last night, in the big moment, Betances struck Bautista out looking. Now that is making a different difference. The Jays didn't get another baserunner, as Betances pitched a perfect 8th, and Miller a perfect 9th.

Yankees 3, Blue Jays 2. WP: Barbato (1-0 -- his 1st major league win). SV: Miller (2). LP: Brett Cecil (0-2).

The Yankees got a bit of a scare when McCann took a foul tip off his foot and had to leave the game. X-rays showed a bruised toe. He'll be out for at least a couple of games, but it looks like he won't have to go on the Disabled List. It looks like Austin Romine will be the catcher in the interim.

The series continues tonight. Michael Pineda starts against J.A. Happ.

*

Meanwhile, the Mets fell to 2-5, losing to the Miami Marlins 2-1. The New York Daily News, which slobbered over the Mets so much last year their writers needed a bib at time, ripped them this morning.

The Yankees are 4-2, the Mets are 2-5. At this rate, the Yankees will finish 108-54, and the Mets will finish 48-116.

"But, Uncle Mike," you say, "it's still early. It's a long season. Anything can happen."

True. But, last season, the Mets won 90 games. To match that this season, they'd have to win 88 of their last 155 -- a 92-win pace. Hardly impossible for a team that won 90 games last season, but, right now, they're hitting as badly as they did in last year's World Series, which is worse than the Yankees hit from September 1 onward.

As they say on medical dramas, "I'm not going to lie to you: It doesn't look good."

Paul Carey, 1928-2016

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When you think, "The Voice of the Detroit Tigers," the legendary Ernie Harwell comes to mind. But it was his partner who knew them better, because, unlike the Georgia gentleman Harwell, he was a fan of theirs first.

Paul Carey -- apparently, no middle name -- was born on March 15, 1928 in the Detroit suburb of Mount Pleasant, Michigan. He went to Central Michigan University, transferring to Michigan State University. When WCEN, 94.5 FM, went on the air in 1949, he was part of its first broadcast staff, including broadcasting CMU football games. This was interrupting when he was drafted into the U.S. Army during the Korean War.

In 1956, he joined the announcing staff at Detroit station WJR, and became assistant sports director in 1958. He became known throughout Michigan for his scoreboard show for high school football and basketball.

In 1964, he became the main producer for the Detroit Tigers Radio Network, including their 1968 World Championship. The announcing team was Ernie Harwell and Ray Lane. In 1973, Lane left (he juggled several sportscasting jobs, and was eventually brought back by the Tigers), so Carey became the Hall-of-Famer Harwell's partner, and remained so until 1991, when the two of them were "retired."

"Maybe one of the reasons we got along so well is that there was quite a difference in our personalities and approaches," he said. "Ernie got up early and exercised early. I got up late as I could, and exercised as little as I could. I'm a worrier. Ernie was not. He didn't fret. Again, maybe that's why we got along so well. We weren't finishing each other's sentences."
Ernie and Paul in the broadcast booth at Tiger Stadium

Carey also did pregame and postgame shows for the Detroit Lions, and, occasionally, games of the Detroit Pistons. But he's best remembered for the Tigers. He called Al Kaline's 3,000th hit and farewell, the rise of Mark Fidrych and Ron LeFlore, 19 years of double plays by Alan Trammell and Lou Whitaker, Jack Morris' no-hitter, Cecil Fielder becoming baseball's 1st 50-homer man in 13 years, and, most importantly, the Tigers' 1984 season, when they got off to a 35-5 start, ran away with the American League Eastern Division title, and won the World Series, beating the San Diego Padres in 5 games, including a Game 5 clincher at Tiger Stadium, which featured 2 home runs by Kirk Gibson. (What, you thought he was only a World Series hero for the Los Angeles Dodgers?)

Current Tigers play-by-play radio announcer Dan Dickerson described the Harwell-Carey team as follows:

The team of Ernie and Paul was, such a great team. I think the thing I took away from listening to those broadcasts, just the way they called a really good game. I grew up listening to these guys. It was Ray Lane first with Ernie, then it was Paul. And I just liked the way he called the game. It was straightforward.
He had a powerful voice that kind of sucked you into the radio. Ernie was different, but they had that same magic”
He was just very humble and gracious and kind, he loved to share a laugh. He had a big, booming laugh that I’m sure you can picture and he was just a very likable, nice person and for me, it was just a treat to be able to spend any time with him. A truly nice person to go along with being a great broadcaster.
"He had the voice that all broadcasters would love to have," said Detroit Red Wings radio play-by-play voice Ken Kal, a native of the West Side of Detroit. "He made you feel good by the way he broadcast Tiger games. I always felt I was at the ballpark when he was describing the action."

Paul Carey was named Michigan Sportscaster of the Year 6 times, and was elected to the Michigan Sports Hall of Fame. He died yesterday at his home in the Detroit suburb of Rochester, Michigan, after battling heart and lung disease. He was 88 years old.

He is survived by his wife Nancy. His lost his first wife, Patti, to cancer as the Tigers were going for the title in 1984. He had no children. But he had many survivors who enjoyed listening to his broadcasts.

As Lynn Henning put it in today's Detroit News, "His voice was God-granted and God-graced. His broadcast skill, and certainly his personal decency, were gifts also, perhaps as self-enhanced as qualities can be."
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